Doubt myself, lack of security, internal consumption, unable to find myself, unable to find confidence.

Hello question asker!

From your description, I can feel your discomfort and determination. Well done. We can only break through problems and improve ourselves by finding a breakthrough. I give you a thumbs up.

From your description, the questioner is focusing on appearance, self-doubt, lack of security, a pleasing personality, and cold family relationships. What's the overall reason for this?

No one is perfect. Our family environment affects our self-confidence, sense of security, and character. It's not your fault, but your parents' fault for not giving you enough courage and support to face the gossip.

You are an adult now. You can make your own decisions.

If you want it, you can break free from your parents' influence.

You're having trouble because you've let your parents influence you. You need to break free from them.

They will continue to affect your life.

Many people grew up in similar families. You are not alone. You can get out of it too.

If you want to change slowly, learn some basic psychology or seek help from a counselor.

I also want to ask you to think about what you want to look like. How will you try to look like that?

If you look the way you want, will you be different?

I have tips to help you relieve your anxiety. I hope they help.

Accept yourself!

To focus on action, we must accept and understand ourselves.

First, accept negative thoughts and emotions. Then, focus on finishing the task.

And most importantly, learn to affirm yourself and your past efforts, even if they did not meet expectations. This will help you start again. Think of yourself as the best you can be today!

② Self-psychological suggestion

Strengthen yourself mentally in a positive way. Don't give up when you encounter difficulties.

Tell yourself you can do it, you're great, you can do better. Repeat these words to yourself to build confidence.

Psychological research backs this up.

Don't doubt yourself.

Don't doubt yourself. When you doubt yourself, you lose confidence. This makes you look unconfident to others. They may not even notice, but they'll comment on it.

④ Knowledge

The more you learn, the wider your perspective. You can respond calmly to anything that comes your way. This helps you stay calm and respond calmly to things.

Appreciate small successes.

In daily life, whenever you feel good about something, write it down. You can look at it later.

My hypnosis master, Shen Jian, said:

Many friends are sensitive and take things to heart. This can lead to a bad mood.

People are often sensitive because they have low self-esteem.

We need acumen, not sensitivity.

Keen is paying attention to what matters.

Things that deserve attention are responded to well, and there are standards and results. Things that don't deserve attention are ignored, and one is open-minded.

Everyone has the potential to be a source of inspiration, whether they are seeking answers or providing them. By sharing their insights through words, they can enlighten the hearts of many, and this is our collective strength.

Good day. I am a heart exploration coach. I empathize with your feelings of loneliness and helplessness, your desire for affirmation and approval from your parents and others, and the resulting inferiority complex that makes you feel unloved and insecure. You strive to please others at every turn in an effort to gain their approval.

Let us examine the issues that are causing you concern, beginning with a supportive gesture.

1. During our formative years, our parents provided us with the essential life energy that enables us to grow and thrive.

As you mentioned, your parents do love you, but they are accustomed to offering criticism, blame, and denial, which, over time, has led to feelings of worthlessness and unimportance. A sense of worthiness, existence, and security provides the energy to live.

It is important to understand that self-worth is a subjective evaluation and has no bearing on the opinions of others. However, during our formative years, our parents' assessment of us can significantly influence our sense of self-worth. For instance, an individual who is frequently affirmed, praised, and approved of by their parents will possess a high sense of worth and demonstrate confidence.

Individuals who are frequently criticized, blamed, and rejected by their parents tend to have a low sense of self-worth, exhibit heightened sensitivity and suspicion, and experience feelings of inferiority.

Similarly, the author of "Low Self-Esteem and Transcendence," Adler, also experienced feelings of inferiority due to his appearance and physical disability. Despite writing a notable work, he continued to face these challenges. It is evident that inferiority is a common experience, and it can also serve as a source of strength.

It is important to note that problems are not inherently negative. The way we perceive and respond to them can significantly impact our outlook and actions. For instance, the statement "Good-looking bodies are a dime a dozen, but interesting souls are hard to come by" can be interpreted as a unique quality rather than a limitation. By viewing challenges in this way, we can transform them into opportunities or even advantages.

2. Let us now consider your agreeable personality.

Your inclination to please others stems from an underlying fear: that if you fail to meet their expectations, you will be rejected and become isolated. You seek love, attention, and acceptance.

It is important to note that these factors are not contingent on external influences, but rather on one's own actions and perceptions. As previously discussed, self-worth represents an individual's evaluation of their own value.

Everyone is valuable. If you are unsure of your own value, you may inadvertently undermine it and fail to leverage it fully. For instance, your current attempts to please others may be negatively impacting your sense of self-worth.

As children, we lacked the independence, autonomy, and judgment to fully care for ourselves. However, as adults, we have the capacity to become our own primary source of support and provide ourselves with the psychological nourishment we need. One of the simplest ways to do this is to give ourselves positive feedback consistently. Affirm, praise, and accept yourself.

In today's world, it is crucial to seek external validation. If you cannot find it within yourself, it is imperative to identify it from others. The question is not whether you should seek it, but when.

For information on how to enhance your self-worth, please refer to my article "It turns out that the root cause of psychological problems is..." on my personal homepage. At the same time, it is important to learn to accept your parents' imperfections. It is essential to remember that although they are your parents, they are also human beings first and foremost. The love they have for you and the way they express it is only what they can show within the limits of their perception.

It would be beneficial to consider the role of your parents' behaviour as a model. It is possible that they did not intend to criticise or blame you, but rather that their behaviour was a habit.

Approach all situations with a positive, optimistic outlook. Consider multiple perspectives and prioritize those that align with your personal goals. Life is beautiful, and the world is beautiful. These experiences can serve as valuable resources for future endeavors, including material for writing. You have more influence than you may realize.

Rather than focusing on pleasing others, prioritize your own growth and development through learning. Books such as "Psychological Nutrition," "You Should Fly Like a Bird to Your Mountain," and "Inferiority and Transcendence" are available through the platform reading club for your reference.

I hope the above is helpful to you. Best regards,

Should you wish to continue communicating, you may click "Find a coach" in the upper right corner or at the bottom. I will communicate and grow with you one-on-one.

Good morning, question asker. My name is Evan.

From the author's own description, it can be seen that the author has been subjected to ridicule by others due to her appearance, which has led to self-doubt and a heightened concern with meeting external expectations. Additionally, the limited support provided by her parents has contributed to feelings of insecurity and an inability to navigate social interactions effectively.

If we are unable to alter the circumstances, we can at least modify our own behaviour and accept ourselves. Prior to this, I believe it is crucial to understand oneself.

Provide a reassuring gesture, such as a pat on the shoulder, to offer encouragement and support. The process of understanding oneself, recognizing one's strengths and limitations, and accepting one's identity is an ongoing journey of self-discovery.

If you lack clarity regarding your own strengths and weaknesses, or if your understanding of yourself is one-dimensional, you may find yourself overwhelmed by a multitude of thoughts and feelings.

Given the extensive discussion of the question on this platform, I will limit my advice to a few key points on how to gain self-awareness.

Know yourself.

It is essential to learn to recognize oneself, and the questioner must also recognize their own strengths and qualities. Different personalities have different strengths and weaknesses. Understanding one's strengths and the qualities one values can provide balance when one attempts to understand one's own shortcomings. If one is unable to clearly identify one's strengths, one should try writing them down on a piece of paper, for example:

I enjoy engaging in critical thinking.

I have a strong sense of justice.

I will conduct an internal assessment of my personal strengths and weaknesses.

I observe the behaviors of others and identify strategies that have proven effective for them.

I am a kind and considerate individual.

It is important to note that there is no need to list all of your strengths at once. If you are unable to think of them all immediately, simply write them down as you remember them. This process will help you gain a deeper understanding of your strengths and abilities.

Please provide a list of your achievements.

By listing our achievements from childhood to the present, we can identify and recognize our strengths. These achievements can be divided into three categories: assistance provided to others, personal achievements, and difficulties overcome. It is not necessary for these achievements to be publicly recognized or praised for them to be considered achievements.

The questioner indicated that they were teased due to their appearance. How did they cope with these challenges? By paying closer attention to oneself and identifying past achievements, individuals can gain a deeper understanding of their strengths.

By way of illustration,

At the age of ten, I acquired the ability to ride a bicycle without any formal instruction.

Despite facing teasing from numerous individuals, I demonstrated resilience and did not engage in any harmful actions towards myself or others.

During the pandemic, I had to identify my strengths in order to maintain my livelihood. Now that I have overcome this challenging period, I am in a position to recognize my own capabilities and am in a positive place.

List your achievements that are worthy of recognition. This will provide the questioner with a better understanding of their strengths.

It is important to recognize any negative views you may have of yourself.

It is important to recognize how you see yourself. Sometimes, we may be overly critical of certain unsatisfactory aspects of ourselves. In some cases, we may even develop negative emotions in order to rebel against a stagnant life. For example, the questioner feels that their appearance is not good enough, that their parents do not care enough about or support them, and that they feel resentment and inferiority towards their appearance.

These thoughts may have originated in the original family environment or may be intrinsic to your personality. Administering excessive self-criticism for these negative traits may result in the formation of negative perceptions and even baseless harsh judgments. In addition to fostering negative emotions such as self-doubt, this approach is not conducive to positive outcomes.

For example, feelings of shame or disappointment are counterproductive to self-acceptance. The questioner can attempt to list negative views of themselves, such as:

I do not meet the standards of physical attractiveness.

My interpersonal relationships are not optimal.

I have difficulty maintaining a positive relationship with my parents.

I consistently reject the reality of the situation.

In order to gain a more objective perspective, it is helpful to question the inner voice that criticizes oneself.

When faced with negative and self-deprecating thoughts, it is important to challenge these beliefs and promote positive self-talk. Utilise affirmative language or thoughts to counteract them, or leverage your previously identified strengths to resist negative thoughts.

If you find yourself thinking, "I did not exercise self-discipline yesterday," consider rephrasing it to reflect a more positive outlook. For example, you could say, "I did not exercise self-discipline yesterday, but I did well in other areas. I was just a little tired."

It is important to remind yourself of your strengths. Everyone has talents and expertise in different areas, and it is important to recognize your own. Negative thoughts should be addressed and corrected.

"I am aware that my inner critic often comments on my physical appearance. However, I have now identified my strengths and believe that I am capable of excelling in other areas.

It is important to treat your inner critic with respect and to provide yourself with constructive feedback.

It is important to accept yourself.

It is important to pursue activities that align with your interests and values, and to identify your life's goals and meaning in these areas. It is also essential to accept your current state, whether positive or negative.

When you are in a low mood, you have the option of taking steps to improve your mood. One way to do this is to engage in an activity that brings you pleasure. Additionally, consuming a sweet treat can have a positive effect on your mood.

In any case, it is important to ensure your own happiness without causing harm to others. Self-acceptance is a process that requires time and patience. It is essential to remember that you are in the process of reshaping your own perception of yourself.

Individuals possess unique characteristics. At times, we become accustomed to following a similar trajectory. However, a repetitive routine can foster adverse emotions and impede our ability to embrace our authentic selves. It is essential to venture beyond the confines of our self-imposed limitations, seek joy in life, and discover our genuine selves.

It is important to be patient, recognize your own qualities, accept yourself, and make yourself more comfortable.

It is my hope that this response will prove helpful to the individual who posed the question.

Hello, question asker.

I empathize with your feelings and understand your state of mind. I perceive the sensitivity and fragility of the questioner's heart, the low sense of self-worth, the internal conflict and helplessness, and the psychological desire to make changes urgently. Let's explore these together:

"Due to appearance-related challenges, I have experienced some teasing from others, which has led to feelings of self-doubt and insecurity. I have also learned to navigate life with a personality that is generally well-liked, but with some internal struggles."

"Due to appearance-related issues, I have experienced ridicule from others, which has led to feelings of self-doubt and insecurity. I have striven to be a kind and agreeable person, yet I find myself struggling with internal conflicts."

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider that true security often comes from within. It's possible that appearance is a source of ridicule for many people, though I'm not sure if this is the opinion of the questioner or if they have experienced something similar. It would be valuable to understand more about what happened at the time.

It could be said that true security comes from within. It's possible that appearance is a source of ridicule for many people. I'm not sure if this is the opinion of the questioner or if they have really experienced something. Perhaps it would be helpful to know exactly what happened at the time.

It could be said that true security comes from within. It's possible that appearance is a source of ridicule for many people. I'm not sure if this is the opinion of the original poster or if he has really experienced something. Perhaps it would be helpful to know exactly what happened at the time.

As a general rule, people tend to discuss other people's actions and behaviors rather than their appearance. It's possible that the questioner is feeling a bit sensitive. Additionally, appearance is something that is innate and cannot be changed (except by relying on some techniques, such as plastic surgery, of course). Appearance does not determine everything. It might be helpful to shift your attention from your external image to the improvement of your inner self.

It's not uncommon for people to avoid discussing others' appearances. They're more likely to focus on the way someone does things. It's possible that the questioner is feeling a bit sensitive. It's also worth noting that appearance is something we're born with and can't change (except through certain techniques, like plastic surgery). Appearance doesn't define us entirely. It might be helpful to shift our attention from our external image to the inner self.

"Family relationships are not as close as I would like, and I've been used to keeping things inside since I was a child."

"Family relationships are somewhat distant, and I've been used to keeping things to myself since I was a child."

Everyone is influenced by their family to a certain extent, and it is important to understand this.

It is natural for everyone to be influenced by their family to a certain extent. However, it is important to recognize that we are all individuals with our own thoughts and practices. While it is valuable to learn from our parents, it is also essential to embrace our own unique identity and make decisions that align with our personal values and goals.

Perhaps we could take a moment to consider how we might go about doing this?

Let's take a closer look at how to do this.

Try to accept yourself, if you feel that this is something you need to work on.

It is important to consider one's strengths and weaknesses, as well as one's past experiences. For instance, it is helpful to accept that everyone experiences self-doubt, a lack of security, and a talkative personality from time to time. It is also important to recognize that there are some things and aspects that we cannot do alone. Therefore, it is crucial to maintain a balanced perspective and avoid becoming overly stressed, self-critical, or guilty.

It is important to consider one's strengths and weaknesses, as well as one's past state. This includes accepting that we all have moments of self-doubt, a lack of security, and a talkative personality. It is also essential to recognize that there are certain things and aspects that we cannot do alone. In such cases, it is natural to feel stressed, to blame oneself, or to experience guilt. However, it is also important to give oneself a little more time.

It is also important to accept yourself as you are and recognize that this is who you truly are, not perfect. However, it is essential to believe in your ability to improve and make positive changes. For instance, you can choose to believe that you can make a difference, starting with small steps and gradually making a significant impact.

It is also important to accept yourself as you are and recognize that you have strengths and weaknesses, just like everyone else. While it is natural to have self-doubt and feel insecure at times, it is essential to believe in your ability to improve and grow. You can start by taking small steps and seeing significant changes over time.

It might be helpful to encourage yourself and believe in yourself.

You might find it helpful to read some celebrity biographies and inspirational books and movies, and compare yourself to the protagonists to identify the psychological qualities you share with them. This could be a useful way to affirm yourself and motivate yourself.

You might find it helpful to read some celebrity biographies and inspirational books and movies, and compare yourself to the protagonists to identify the psychological qualities you share with them. This could be a useful way to affirm yourself and motivate yourself.

It might be helpful to try replacing negative thoughts with positive ones. For example, you could say "I'm great" and "I can" instead of "I'm no good" and "I'm afraid."

It might be helpful to consider trying more things in order to enrich your life.

It might be helpful to consider trying more things to enrich your life.

It might be helpful to consider trying something new.

It might be helpful to consider developing several hobbies, trying new things, or participating in activities such as flower arrangement, reading, writing, sports, and so on. Anything that you feel is new and interesting can be tried. It's also worth noting that sometimes you only discover something is interesting after trying it.

You might also consider studying, taking exams, or improving your qualifications. When you are busy, you may find that you feel very fulfilled and that other concerns recede into the background.

It is not always necessary to be overly concerned with the opinions of others.

I try not to concern myself too much with the opinions of others.

Given the vast differences in family backgrounds and upbringing, it is understandable that everyone's way of thinking and doing things may differ. Even when faced with the same situation, their opinions may vary.

I believe that being yourself is the best way forward. It is not always necessary to care too much about what other people think.

It might be helpful to consider saying no.

If I might make a suggestion, I believe that people with a pleasing personality often don't know how to say no, so they end up agreeing to things they don't really want to do. One way to start might be by saying no to small, insignificant things. If you're not confident in your ability to say no outright, you can try saying no in a more tactful way, for example, saying that you'd love to help but you're really busy this time and can't, but you'll be there next time if you need anything.

People with a pleasing personality may sometimes find it challenging to say no, leading them to agree to tasks they may not truly want to do. It can be helpful to start with smaller, less significant requests. If you're not confident in your ability to say no directly, you can try saying no in a more tactful way, such as explaining that you'd love to help but you're currently busy and can't, but you'll be there next time if you're needed.

I hope my answer will be of some assistance to the questioner. Best regards!

I hope my answer will be helpful to the original poster. Best wishes!

Hello, host!

I really hope that giving you a warm hug can bring you some comfort!

From what the landlord said, it seems like they're a little confused about their own situation.

So, what's causing all this confusion, and how can we fix it?

It's so sad that because of their appearance, they are mocked by many people.

Over time, they start to doubt themselves and feel insecure.

They try their best to be a nice person, but they can't seem to get out of their own way.

You are loved just the way you are!

We are all born into this world as unique individuals, and that's a wonderful thing! Even twins have their own personalities and characters.

It doesn't matter what they look like, how well they do at school, how well they do at work, how much money they make, whether they get married and have children, or whether they are successful or not.

There's no reason to dislike ourselves along the way in life. We need to accept ourselves, and we can do it!

Family relationships were on the cool side, and from an early age I got used to keeping things inside. My parents, bless their hearts, tried to be funny but sometimes came across as a bit sharp-tongued and sarcastic.

You deserve to love yourself!

We can see how the original family of the host has shaped this family atmosphere, which is also the main reason for the host's current lack of security and lack of love.

The reason the host has such serious internal conflict is that they hate and dislike this self so much.

It doesn't matter what others say about you, and it doesn't matter whether you received enough love as a child.

As adults, it's so important to learn to love ourselves.

Showing that you love yourself is not about treating yourself well or dressing well. It's about accepting yourself, and that's something we can all do!

Appreciate yourself, affirm yourself, and believe in yourself, my friend.

It's so important to love yourself! If you don't, who will?

There's no amount of parental love that can fill the love you have for yourself.

Love may seem like a gift from others, but as I grew up, I realized that

I've learned that I need to be love itself, because no matter how much love I get from others, it won't help me if I don't love myself.

It can be tough to find opportunities to communicate, and I know how it feels to feel like you've shut yourself off from the world.

To give your self-confidence a boost, the first thing you need to do is connect with the people you love.

It's clear that the original poster is hoping to find a way to communicate with others and break out of his own closed circle.

So, my dear friend, start by reconciling with your parents. And start by finding the closest friends around you and share your true thoughts.

You know, only when you are true to yourself can you generate the greatest strength and energy.

My existence can only reflect my self-worth when I connect with others.

Have faith in yourself, give yourself a boost, and let yourself know that you can do it!

It's so important to not worry about how you look, whether you can speak, and to find your strengths and express them. And you can do it! You can find confidence.

And, slowly but surely, you'll build up your self-confidence!

I really hope the original poster can break free from the shackles he has set for himself.

I'm Warm June, and I just want to say that I love you, world!

Dear question asker,

It is distressing to observe you disclosing your personal difficulties.

I extend to you a warm embrace.

It is challenging to lack a sense of security, and I empathize with your struggles.

I, too, am an insecure individual, plagued by self-doubt, an absence of self-confidence, internal conflict, and an inability to identify my true self. Your discussion of these issues evokes a profound sense of empathy for your situation. It appears that you are experiencing a sense of identity crisis, potentially stemming from a lack of parental attention, which can lead to feelings of insecurity and vulnerability. Your loneliness and lack of affection can also contribute to a lack of self-confidence.

Family relationships are typically characterized by a certain degree of emotional distance, and since childhood, individuals may have been conditioned to internalize their emotions. As a result, they may experience a certain level of discomfort when confronted with external pressures and the comments of those around them.

(As a result of appearance-related issues, they have been subjected to ridicule by numerous individuals, leading to a gradual onset of self-doubt and insecurity. In their daily lives, they have adopted a persona that is perceived as agreeable by others, yet they remain unable to fully disengage from this internal conflict. Witnessing this situation has enabled me to gain insight into your inner experiences of insecurity. Appearance can be conceptualised as a person's mental outlook and social facade. You perceive yourself to be inferior, which makes it challenging for you to feel confident.)

It is important to gain an understanding of one's own feelings.

It is, in fact, not always the case that appearance is the primary source of insecurity. It is important to note that societal acceptance remains a prevalent phenomenon. There are numerous individuals on various forms of media who may be perceived as lacking conventional standards of beauty, yet have achieved notable success. These examples illustrate that external factors, such as physical appearance, are not necessarily determinative in one's ability to excel in a given field.

Everything has two sides, and there are advantages and disadvantages. While appearance may contribute to feelings of insecurity, it also serves as a form of protection from external harassment and ensures personal safety.

Let us consider the character of Wei Shen once more. He is depicted holding a steamed bun in his left hand and a bottle of water in his right. His speech is incoherent, and as a result, he is unable to attract a marriage partner in his village.

However, he displays remarkable confidence in his mathematical abilities. This concept can be applied to one's personal growth through dedication and effort. When one possesses an optimistic outlook, it becomes easier to perceive positive aspects in any situation.

The physical form is a gift from one's parents and is intrinsic to the individual. It is not something that can be altered by external influences. It is possible to accept one's friends and to accept oneself.

An individual's achievements cannot be determined by their appearance, nor can they be labeled as "ugly" based solely on their outward appearance.

The true beauty of a person lies not in their outward appearance, but in their moral character and inner strength. It is this inner beauty that truly sets them apart.

Your perspective is not erroneous. It is unnecessary to perpetually question the value of life and our own existence in order to determine our own paths. Each individual possesses unique preferences. There is no rationale for doubting the value of life in order to align with the aesthetic standards of others. If you doubt yourself and expend energy in this manner, you will not receive understanding from others, nor will they understand you. This would undoubtedly be a more exhausting state of being.

One might consider undertaking an activity that would facilitate personal growth. Such an activity could include a shift in perspective regarding the opinions of others, particularly in regard to what is considered beautiful or ugly.

Your personality is agreeable, which evokes a strong emotional response in me. You are willing to make personal sacrifices for the benefit of others. However, you have the capacity to cultivate yourself at a gradual pace, prioritize your emotions, recognize that you are not beholden to others, and prioritize your own happiness.

The concept of beauty is not contingent upon outward appearance; rather, it resides within the heart.

It is inevitable that someone will love you and that someone will pay attention to you. It is merely a matter of time before you meet someone who makes you feel safe. Your heart is beautiful, and your world is beautiful too.

It is recommended that you place your trust in this assertion and endeavor to cultivate a sense of confidence in yourself.

I will accompany you on your journey of growth and development. Let us proceed together.

Everyone has an inner desire to be recognized and accepted. When the voices from the outside world, especially those from the people closest to you, lack encouragement and are full of sarcasm and judgment, individuals living in such an environment for a long time may become uncertain about themselves and lack a sense of security.

The internal desire and internal voice can sometimes create internal friction, making this state of life quite challenging. I hope that the following sharing can help to alleviate the host's worries to some extent.

1. It might be helpful to recognize that external rating systems have often been perceived as violent towards individuals from the perspective of "the other."

It seems that the source of the questioner's self-doubt and lack of security is appearance. It may also be the case that aesthetics is a subjective evaluation system.

From ancient times to the present, from the domestic to the overseas, and from a variety of perspectives, there has never been a definitive conclusion on the concepts of beauty and ugliness.

It is unfortunate that the environment in which the questioner operates largely aligns with the same aesthetic evaluation system. Those who do not adhere to this system may face criticism from some individuals.

It would be fair to say that such "violence" occurs in all aspects of life.

It is understandable that it can be challenging for individuals to change their identity in the cultural environment. However, with the right support and encouragement, this can be achieved.

In such cases, it is helpful for individuals to maintain a clear awareness and recognize the irrationality of such evaluation systems and the "violence" of evaluation formed by the collective unconscious. This can help us distance ourselves from such evaluations, thereby minimizing the harm.

Secondly, it is important to recognise that while closing oneself off may be a natural response to protect oneself, it can also act as a barrier to growth and development.

It is not uncommon for individuals in this situation to feel the need to protect themselves from the unfriendliness of their surroundings and the harshness of their parents' words. This can result in a tendency to withdraw from the outside world. It is understandable that this may feel like the best option in the short term.

This approach may help us to be less vulnerable to external harm at the beginning, but it also brings another kind of greater "invisible" harm over time. Because of the decrease in external communication, the self may become more and more closed off, while the individual's ability to deal with emergencies or improve interpersonal communication skills is generated and developed through constant interaction with others.

If you're interested in breaking the deadlock and restoring your self-confidence, you might consider starting in a safe place and gradually expanding your social circle. For example, you could contact a professional psychological counselor or a psychological growth support group. In a safe environment, you can experience interpersonal interactions, grow your social skills, and care for yourself.

With each successful experience, there is an opportunity to improve the original negative cycle and re-establish a safe and benign path of self-growth.

3. It might be helpful to try to maintain a certain psychological distance from the part that consumes your inner strength.

I'm not sure how old the questioner is. It would be helpful to know if they are able to live independently.

If you are able to live independently and your parents are unable to recognize your need for autonomy, it may be helpful to consider creating some distance between you and them, even if it means moving to a different living situation. When external influences continue to challenge the inner strength you have recently developed, creating some distance can be an important first step.

Gradually, as you become stronger and more able to help improve your relationship with your parents, actively reaching out can be a good way to repair your relationship with others. It may be helpful to do this with the support of a professional, at your own pace.

If you are unable to live independently and need to rely on your parents for material support, it might be helpful to consider developing more external support systems, which could help you gain more strength.

It may be helpful to consider seeking support from sources such as friendly classmates and teachers at school, psychological groups and mutual aid groups in society, and friendly colleagues at work. The screening process can be achieved by taking small steps as mentioned above.

In the above, I am not attempting to delve deeply into the intricacies of human nature. Instead, I am simply sharing the perspective of a therapist who cares about the human heart. I wish you well.

In the above, I am not attempting to explore human nature, but rather to present the perspective of a psychologist who cares about the human heart. I wish you well.

Hello! I'll give you a warm hug from afar first!

They can feel the deep inferiority and lack of self-confidence that comes from being teased and mocked by their parents since childhood. But there's hope! They can learn to accept themselves.

Children are amazing! They often interpret and understand themselves from their parents' words and actions. If parents can always face their children with words and actions that affirm, accept, encourage, and praise them, especially when the children do poorly or make mistakes, then the children will feel unconditional self-acceptance-yet-still-struggle-to-accept-the-past-self-9544.html" target="_blank">acceptance, love, and support from their parents. At this time, the children's inner self-confidence and sense of self-worth will be established and cultivated.

If, during a child's development, the parents are emotionally neglectful, insensitive, and dissatisfied with the child, denying, scolding, and rejecting the child, no matter how hard the child tries, as long as they don't meet the parents' expectations, it's time to make a change! At this time, the child's heart will develop extreme inferiority, lack of self-confidence, and rejection of themselves, because the child sees a bad, not good enough self through the parents' words and actions. So he will become extremely sensitive, withdrawn, passive, and worried about being rejected and denied. But there's hope! With the right guidance, this child can become the amazing person they were meant to be.

So, when a child is not aware of this part, he will do his absolute best to gain affirmation and acceptance in all subsequent stages of life! He may even sacrifice his legitimate needs to deliberately please others. Why? Because being accepted and affirmed will satisfy one's internal sense of belonging and security, which is a person's most basic psychological need.

So, the anxiety you feel about your appearance is actually a reflection of your feelings about yourself. You use your appearance as a way to relieve the anxiety of not accepting yourself, right? And you know what? The standard of beauty varies from person to person. Someone who likes you will definitely like your appearance, and someone who doesn't like you won't. It's as simple as that!

So, the good news is that the problem with appearance is more a projection of your inner self-rejection and lack of confidence.

So, let's dive in and learn to accept ourselves better and cultivate self-confidence!

It's time to understand that the low self-esteem, lack of confidence, and lack of acceptance of oneself that resulted from the parents' immature parenting style in the original family is not because you are really not good enough or are terrible. To a large extent, it is because the parents were also children who were raised in that way by their parents and grew up unloved, deprived, inferior, and lacking in self-confidence. But here's the good news! When they are not well aware of the parenting model in which they grew up, they instinctively replicate the way their parents once raised them in their parent-child relationship. This means you have the power to change things!

You're in a great position right now because you've already gained some awareness of the way you were brought up. This means you can start making changes right away, guided by this self-awareness!

Write a letter to your parents! Tell them about the psychological trauma you've suffered since childhood due to their immature parenting style. At the same time, express how you want to be treated and what support you need from your parents for your own healing. Don't pass judgment on their past actions. Express your deep love and understanding for your parents, too!

This is you trying to reconcile with your parents and your own inner trauma. And you can do it! All you have to do is face it, try to accept it, and understand what has happened. Then you'll have the strength to try to change.

Absolutely! You can definitely try to learn to accept yourself better by making a list of your self-acceptance strengths. This will enable you to see both your shortcomings and your many bright spots and strengths.

Guess what? You can cultivate self-confidence and enhance your sense of self-worth by keeping a gratitude journal!

It's time to start living your life for yourself! Try to cultivate more interests and passions outside of study and life, so that you can take control of more and more things.

I highly recommend that you take the initiative to read some psychology books and learn psychology knowledge to nurture yourself again from the inside out!

I highly recommend you read "The Family of Origin," "The Neglected Child," "A Life Not Controlled by Parents," and "High Energy Posture." You'll love them!

The world and I love you!

Good day, my name is Du Xi.

I empathize with your situation and perceive the distress and solitude you are experiencing. From perusing your correspondence, I discern that you are a highly astute individual with a profound understanding of your own identity.

It should have been possible for you to interpret the theoretical content without assistance. There do not appear to be any issues that require resolution.

Let us engage in a straightforward discussion.

The attribution of ridicule to one's appearance leads to self-doubt and a loss of self-confidence. It is therefore erroneous to assume that individuals with good appearances are necessarily superior and self-assured.

The answer is "not necessarily." If one decides that ridicule is a result of one's appearance and allows it to continue, one may develop the belief that this is an irreversible outcome. Since one cannot alter one's appearance, it may seem that one cannot change the opinions of others.

If this line of thinking persists over time, it can lead to depression, desperation, and avoidance behaviors.

The "pleasing personality" results in a loss of self, disregard for one's own feelings, the practice of accommodating others, and an intense effort to become the person others desire. Concerns about inadequacy, the opinions of others, and accusations of wrongdoing are common.

Ultimately, these experiences will result in suffering, anxiety, and a loss of self-identity. As previously discussed, these outcomes are closely linked to the way in which one's parents treated them.

It is evident that you are aware of the underlying cause; however, it would be beneficial to ascertain the most effective method for its resolution. It is postulated that the fundamental issue can be addressed by initiating a process of familial reconciliation and resolution.

Although one may be aware that one's parents love them, this awareness does not necessarily translate into an emotional sense of being loved. A sarcastic tone used by one's parents can have a detrimental effect on one's self-esteem. This kind of hurt from childhood can persist into adulthood.

Thus, while you possess a robust sense of self-esteem, you also exhibit a notable degree of vulnerability. It is imperative to recognize that they are perpetuating the same patterns of behavior observed in their upbringing by their parents, which has resulted in a similar level of disadvantage for them.

It is imperative that you extend forgiveness to them. They were also first-time parents, and it is crucial to recognize that in their era, there was not the same abundance of information available as there is today. They lacked access to resources that could have equipped them with the knowledge to navigate their circumstances more effectively. They were young when you were young, and they were not yet mature enough to control their emotions well.

It is therefore recommended that you adopt a genuinely forgiving and accepting attitude towards your past.

From this point forward, they are no longer as young and have experienced more challenges. You are no longer that childlike individual either, and you can communicate in a manner that is characteristic of adults.

It is recommended that the individual open their heart and engage in discourse regarding their comprehension of the other person's perspective, their feelings of affection and concern for them, and their recollections of childhood experiences, including those that caused distress, were incomprehensible, and were misinterpreted.

It is recommended that you inform your parents of your preferred method of communication. Additionally, it is advised that you address any apprehensions you may have regarding their knowledge of your innermost thoughts and feelings.

It is recommended that an in-depth conversation be held with one's parents, that any residual pain be released, and that forgiveness be extended to one's younger self.

It can be argued that only when an individual opens up internally can they allow love to enter their life. This will result in feelings of warmth, security and confidence. It is recommended that individuals identify an activity that will provide them with a sense of accomplishment when they complete it and then proceed to do so.

For example, one might consider maintaining a fitness routine or acquiring a new skill.

It is my sincere hope that this message will prove beneficial to you. It is a well-established fact that bold and decisive action yields tangible outcomes, whereas analysis and theory often prove ineffective. I wish you the utmost success.

I am eager to receive your response.

Hello, questioner! I am impressed by your self-awareness and your determination to understand your destiny. I also empathize with your feelings of helplessness.

You are already on the path to change, and you're doing great! We don't live in reality, but in our own perception.

First, you've identified the impact your parents' relationship and interactions with your children have had on you. You've also recognized the need for change. I advise you to take this a step further by concretizing these influences, listing them, and creating a plan of action for each change.

Set periodic goals for yourself, from your manner of speaking to the details of your life. Make the first change, no matter how small.

Second, you must accept that parent-child relationships and living habits are difficult to change. The only way to influence your family is to start by changing yourself. (This is a later point.) Stand on your own growth.

You must believe, once again, that you are a unique being, the master of your own destiny. Many famous psychologists are role models for change and success in adversity. Adler's "Inferiority and Transcendence" states that people must have the courage to be hated in order to achieve unexpected self-transcendence. Regarding the mockery of appearance, I am certain that the icon of the Apple phone is a unique bite out of it. God has given a special mark to every unique life, and we are the unique "one".

Girl, you will have no time to please others when you become strong inside, constantly enriching and perfecting yourself, growing yourself. With knowledge and culture, you will naturally exude charm, and beauty will come to you as promised.