How should I handle my boyfriend's seamless transition to the next girl?

Dear Author,

You feel frustrated and angry because your trust was betrayed and your feelings were belittled. Here are some suggestions for dealing with these emotions:

1. Accept the reality: Your boyfriend has already moved on. His actions show that he no longer respects you or the relationship.

2. Set boundaries. It's important to set clear boundaries in relationships. You've already taken the first step by removing yourself from his life.

Pay more attention to these boundaries in future relationships.

3. Express your feelings. Talk about your feelings with someone you trust, or see a counselor.

4. Focus on yourself: Do things you enjoy, such as exercise, learning a new skill, traveling, or starting a new hobby.

5. Don't blame yourself. You did nothing wrong.

6. Look forward: It may be hard, but try to forget the past and look to the future. There are many wonderful things and people in life waiting for you.

7. Learn to let go. Sometimes the best thing to do is move on. It will be painful, but you will meet someone who truly values you.

Everyone has the right to be loved. Time will heal you, and you will meet someone better.

I hope you can escape your unhappy past.

Dear author, It's as if meeting someone in person when reading their words.

It is understandable that the transition may feel abrupt and cause discomfort. It is natural to experience feelings of betrayal, isolation, and uncertainty about your own emotions.

I can sense that you are currently facing some challenges. His actions and the lack of clarity in your relationship over the past two months have made things more difficult. "We still did the things couples do and were still as close as a couple during these two months." "On the contrary, he still asked me to spend Valentine's Day with him on February 14th." "At the same time, he mentioned the new person he likes." An unresolved relationship can be confusing and unsettling.

He mentioned you both in his circle of friends. When you confronted him about his anger, he said you didn't cherish this opportunity. It seems that he already had no respect for the relationship. Love is exclusive, and his actions may have violated the principles of love.

Additionally, his words indicate that there is a discrepancy in the level of power and influence between the two parties. However, you were able to prevent further damage and take the initiative to end the relationship, which is a rational and proactive decision that many people are often reluctant to make. I understand that this must have been a difficult and painful experience for you.

If I might humbly offer you a word to consider, it would be "allowing everything to happen." This is an open-minded attitude towards life, which means accepting all kinds of changes and uncertainties in life, not resisting or complaining, but facing them with a calm mind.

In this situation, allowing everything to happen can help you better accept this reality, let go of the past, and stop obsessing about why this happened. It can also encourage you to pay more attention to your own inner feelings, rather than focusing too much on the other person's actions.

It is important to note that "letting go" does not necessarily imply giving up or being passive. In fact, it can be a constructive approach that allows you to face difficulties with greater composure and determination, actively seek solutions, spend more time with friends and family, and participate in activities you enjoy, thereby enhancing the fulfillment and meaning of your life.

You may encounter many uncontrollable things in the future, and I hope you can start again with this mentality. As the saying goes, "nothing is impossible." Although this relationship is over, it also opens up new possibilities for you. You can learn from this experience, grow, and find someone who is more suitable for you.

At the same time, it also encourages you to bravely face pain and difficulties, and not be afraid to change your habits without him. Perhaps by letting go of the past and breaking your dependence on this relationship, you will find that you have more strength and courage.

If I may make one more suggestion, I would like to recommend a book about love called "What kind of love is worth being brave for once?" by Shen Yi. The book mentions some views on love, such as learning to enjoy your own charm in

I would like to respectfully suggest a book about love that I found particularly insightful: "What kind of love is worth being brave for once?" by Shen Yi. The book offers some valuable perspectives on love, such as learning to appreciate your own unique charm in a relationship, gradually defining the relationship between the two parties, and not setting too many expectations at the beginning. The goal is to embrace the present, without necessarily having to be with someone in particular.

It is also worth noting that when in a relationship, it is important not to let the burden of love weigh you down too much. Falling in love and getting along with each other itself only helps to make a choice, choose the right person, and choose a way of getting along that you like. In addition, the book also mentions the principle of the bottom line, which you can read and learn.

I hope that we can find a way to unite our knowledge and actions, and that we can all enjoy a happy life.

Hello, I am a heart exploration coach. I believe in the beauty of life and the importance of appreciating it. However, I also believe that life is about growth and self-development.

You thought you could face the end of a relationship with grace, but when the day really came, you realized that you, too, could be very sad. It would be helpful to find a solid shoulder to lean on, a corner where no one could see you cry, and someone who understood you to talk to.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider that all the words are just a cover-up for your own feelings.

Two months ago, he indicated that he was no longer interested in pursuing a relationship with you. Your decision to forgive and understand his actions may have inadvertently provided him with an opportunity to back down gracefully and to share his experience with others.

It seems that he is not seamlessly connecting with the next person, but rather, he is a "sea king" who may benefit from learning how to cherish and cultivate self-love. It appears that he is engaging in a complex relationship with two women simultaneously.

Perhaps what makes you angry is that he cheated on you first, and then proceeded to insult you with his arrogant words and by naming the "little third party."

Perhaps it would be more constructive to direct your anger at yourself for misplacing your affections. It is certainly a cause for reflection that you were friends with someone of such a despicable character for a whole year.

You are upset that you misjudged the situation and feel that you may have wasted your prime years on someone who was not a good match for you.

It would be beneficial for you to rediscover the feeling of loving yourself first.

I would like to bring to your attention an incident that occurred when I first started working. A senior supervisor used another colleague at fault to discipline me. I would like to clarify that I am not her parent and therefore do not have any responsibility or obligation to educate her.

He is who he is, you are who you are, and as a parent, you are not obliged to educate him. Sooner or later, he will have to face the consequences of his actions.

It seems that, whether you are emotionally attached to him or resent him, you are lamenting the fact that you once gave your true feelings and devoted a year of your time.

He has lost someone who treated him well, and that is unfortunate. You, on the other hand, have just seen someone with flaws and realized that love and cherishing are not his strengths.

My dear, I believe that taking a step forward can bring happiness, while taking a step back can lead to feelings of loneliness. Ultimately, the choice is yours whether to cocoon yourself or become a butterfly.

"You have the opportunity to become a better version of yourself after a breakup." It is important to remember that the person who loves you first loves you first. It is not necessary for anyone to deserve to be loved more than you.

I hope these words are helpful to you. I also want to say that I love you, and I hope the world can see that too.

If you would like to continue the conversation, you are welcome to follow my personal homepage, "Heart Exploration Service."

First, identify the reason for your unhappiness.

1. Your boyfriend has already started liking another girl. You feel betrayed and hurt.

2. Your boyfriend found someone new but didn't tell you. You felt cheated and let down.

3. Your boyfriend's behavior hurts and disrespects you.

4. Your boyfriend blames you for the situation, which makes you feel wronged.

5. You blame yourself for not helping your boyfriend move on.

2. What does the end of this relationship mean to you?

The end of this relationship may mean:

You value your dignity and self-worth.

This can help you focus on your own values and needs in future relationships and seek out people who respect you.

2. Growth and learning: This relationship can be an opportunity for you to grow and learn. You have already begun to reflect on your own shortcomings and guilt in dealing with this relationship, and this reflection will help you better understand your needs and be clearer and more steadfast in future relationships.

3. Rethinking relationships: The end of a relationship is a chance to think about what you want from a partner.

Ending a relationship can help you protect your emotions and release past hurts. Although ending a relationship often brings pain, it also paves the way for personal development and happiness.

3. Getting rid of negative emotions quickly

Leaving a bad person is a good thing. Get over your negative feelings and start a new life.

1. Opportunity to reinvent yourself: Use the end of the relationship to examine your goals, values, and passions. Grow personally and explore new possibilities.

2. Use past experiences to help you in the future. Think about past relationships to understand your needs and expectations.

3. Promote creativity and innovation: Losing a relationship can also inspire new ideas. Express your feelings through art, writing, music, etc., or try new activities to find new goals.

4. Be more self-reliant. Develop your skills, pursue your career goals, and build an independent support system.

You will have more opportunities and be more confident.

5. Try new types of relationships. You can try friendships or peer relationships to meet your emotional needs.

6. Focus on the happiness of the moment. Appreciate the little things and build your own happiness.

This positive mindset helps you face relationship challenges.

I hope these ideas will help you see things differently and start anew.

Hello! I'm Rose, and I'm here to listen.

You seem distressed, unhappy, and dissatisfied. You value this relationship.

Let's talk!

1. Even after breaking up, you still feel strange because you can't bear to be apart. What are your feelings and thoughts?

What do you think about your breakup? Did you tell him how you felt?

2. When he likes someone, you'll end the relationship.

Are you ready to end it?

3. You're disappointed and frustrated.

You didn't think he would like someone so soon. You can't accept this or your actions.

You were hurt because you didn't break up with him completely. You blame yourself.

4. Someone else talked badly about you in a group of friends.

You haven't done anything wrong. You expressed your opinion about his behavior, and it made you feel uncomfortable.

You know how you feel, but you still break up with her. She makes you feel like a third party, which makes you unhappy.

Many people tell you to forget, but you can't. You can't just forget your emotions.

You care what others think and find it hard to accept negative comments.

When you're in love, everything is sweet. When the relationship ends, it's heartbreaking. This is something everyone goes through. It makes you stronger and helps you understand what you want.

Next, we'll look at ways to make you feel better.

Accept yourself.

If you don't accept yourself, you can't love yourself. Any negative comment from others will hurt you, even if it's not true.

You're not wrong to feel this way. You're taking it seriously, giving your love and energy, and following your heart. This is your way of loving.

No matter what happens, accept the self that loves you so much. This self is the most charming and lovable.

When you accept your past self, you can let go.

2. Adjust your perspective.

Your emotions are based on how you perceive things. If you see the good in something, you feel good. If you don't, you feel bad.

If you find something wrong with your partner, it doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. It just means they're not right for you.

3. Love yourself.

From your writing, I can sense that you care a lot about what others think of you. Even if you feel uncomfortable, you still blame yourself.

You are a serious girl with your own bright spot.

When we let others evaluate us, we lose the right to evaluate ourselves.

Learn to respect your feelings. Accept your choices. You haven't done anything wrong. You're just following your heart.

Love yourself by accepting yourself, including the parts you don't like. Affirm yourself and recognize your contributions.

Respect your feelings and choices, and don't worry about what others think.

4. Make new friends.

When you love yourself, you'll find good friends.

Treat yourself well and others will too.

Making new friends can also teach you about human nature.

5. Do what you like.

Do things you enjoy to feel better about yourself.

In this world, only you are your lifelong companion. Even if you are alone, you should still live a wonderful life. Love is what makes relationships special.

It's hard to let go of a relationship when it ends. It's hard to let go of the love and the self that gave of itself.

There will be pain. Allow yourself to feel it and think about it. Then you'll know what to do next.

When a relationship ends, it's over. Accept the past to let go. Ending isn't bad. Look at it as a new beginning.

The end of a relationship doesn't mean you're bad. It just means you're not right for each other. The happiest and most joyful couples are the ones who are right for each other.

I hope these words bring you comfort.

I love you, and may the world embrace you.

Hello, I'm Jokerev. I can relate to the complex emotions and confusion you're experiencing.

In the world of relationships, we often encounter such turning points, which can bring with them a certain degree of bitterness and loss. However, they can also be an important step in self-growth.

First of all, I want to reassure you that your feelings are completely normal and that you should not blame yourself. It is only natural to still be emotionally dependent on him and to try to maintain an intimate relationship, especially after a long period of emotional investment.

However, when he expressed a change in his feelings for you and started paying attention to others, you chose to respect his choice and clarify your position, which has already demonstrated your maturity and reason.

I can imagine that what is happening now is really frustrating and hurtful. It seems that he did not promptly and honestly disclose the new relationship development, but still maintained intimate behavior with you. This approach may not align with the principles of honesty and respect. His behavior in the circle of friends and his attitude towards your questioning may have made you feel even more belittled and betrayed.

Regarding your current emotional state, it is understandable to experience a range of feelings, including anger, sadness, and confusion. It is important to acknowledge these emotions and allow yourself to process them in a healthy manner. With time, these feelings will gradually subside, and you will begin to heal.

At the same time, you might consider drawing strength from this experience and understanding that your value does not necessarily lie in how others treat you, but rather in how you view and cherish yourself.

I believe your decision to delete him was a positive step in protecting yourself from further harm, which is a sign of self-care. As for his comment that you "don't know what's good for you," it seems like it might be a defense mechanism he's using when facing contradictions in his own actions. You might not need to pay it too much attention.

It is important to remember that you have the right to maintain your emotional boundaries and to pursue a healthy, equal, and mutually respectful love.

When you feel down, you might find it helpful to distract yourself by doing something you enjoy, talking to friends, or even seeking professional psychological counseling. It's important to give yourself time and space to accept reality, heal your heart, and then look forward, believing that a better future awaits you.

You deserve someone who loves you unconditionally and respects you as an individual.

It is understandable that you are experiencing these emotions in this situation. It is challenging to navigate the emotional transition and loss that accompany such a relationship dissolution. From your narrative, it is evident that you are hesitant to let go of this relationship and reflect on your own reactions.

It is important to recognize that experiencing a range of emotions, including anger, sadness, and disappointment, is a normal response to an emotional breakup.

It is important to accept the full range of emotions that arise in the process of emotional recovery. It is not advisable to attempt to "get better" quickly; rather, it is essential to allow oneself the time and space to experience these emotions fully. The process of emotional recovery is gradual.

It is beneficial to communicate with friends and family members. Sharing one's feelings can facilitate a sense of support and understanding. Additionally, these individuals can offer a different perspective and assist in viewing the relationship with greater objectivity.

It is important to establish clear boundaries in order to protect one's emotional well-being and facilitate the healing process.

It is advisable to focus on one's own wellbeing. This may entail engaging in physical activity, pursuing pastimes, or pursuing personal growth. It is important to engage in activities that promote happiness and fulfilment.

It is important to reflect on the relationship and learn from it when the time is right. Consider what kind of partner you would like to be and how you can establish healthier boundaries and communication in future relationships.

It is advisable to seek professional assistance if one finds it challenging to cope with these emotions independently or if they have a detrimental impact on one's daily life.

It is important to note that time is the most effective healer. While the process may not be immediately apparent, with each step taken, progress is being made. By ending a relationship with an individual who does not value you, new opportunities and potential for happiness are created.

It is important to be patient and kind to oneself in order to facilitate the process of improvement over time.

It's okay to feel angry.

Interpersonal relationships are based on trust. The other person has had the chance to interact with you, but unfortunately wasn't as loyal as you'd hoped. The thing he did wrong was that he wasn't faithful and he hid things from you and lied.

The poor guy is going to lose your trust in him, but that won't stop him from finding a new girlfriend.

In relationships, if the other person has a lot left undone and forces you to get involved, you can say that if you're just ordinary friends, you'll try your best not to lose money or time. We all make mistakes! Some people often fail to correct the problems in their lives, but we can all try our best to make things better. For example, we can try to be honest and open with each other.

Even though you set clear boundaries when interacting with others, things don't always go as planned. The other person might be dealing with some challenges, like hiding or deceiving. Once you've identified that the other person needs help and is at fault, you have the option to completely reject them. It's best to address problems as soon as possible, without hiding or deceiving.

To avoid any hiccups, it's best to act quickly. It's always a good idea to face the facts and take action more quickly.

It's okay, we all have our flaws. It's likely that you'll find that there are various things about him that you don't particularly like, but that's okay!

He does it on purpose, poor guy. You manage your relationships with all your heart and take life seriously. You will definitely have a better chance of success in your relationships and career than someone who is not committed and not dedicated like your partner.

I know it's a tough decision, but I really think you'll be happier if you make it sooner rather than later.

Dear questioner,

I'm a psychological counselor, and I'm also Xiaoliu, your friendly neighborhood heart detective!

I can see that you're feeling angry and upset. Even though we already know the truth about this relationship, it's only natural that you're still feeling hurt. It's okay to take time to heal and work through your feelings.

I truly believe that you can come out of this dark place.

You deserve the very best!

1. Looking back often involves strong traumatic experiences. Let's try to analyze what happened and re-examine the beginning and end of the incident together. I'm sure that, through this process, we can see more.

(1) Love needs to be nurtured by both parties. In an intimate relationship, it's so important to respect each other.

Involves some "agreements," which I'm sure we can all agree are important!

Of course it does!

Of course, exclusivity is a big part of it.

You were once a couple, experienced mutual attraction, finally confirmed each other as lovers, and have interacted as lovers. This "agreement" means that we cannot just take without giving. It also means that this relationship should probably be based on "love."

It's totally normal to still be attached to him when he tells you that he no longer feels the same way about you as he used to. It's like he's trying to take responsibility for himself, but he's still reluctant to let go of the companionship and emotional value you bring to the relationship. It's okay if he can't guarantee that he can adapt to the empty period after breaking up with you.

He selfishly chose a solution that would allow him to have his cake and eat it too. It's likely that he'll continue to maintain a de facto romantic relationship with you until he finds a new romantic partner who can keep him company, while at the same time publicly stating that he is already "single." This way, he won't have to endure the loneliness of the "window of opportunity," and he'll be able to start a new relationship as a single person.

I just want to say that his behavior is not as simple as "seamless connection." It's actually pretty bad, in my opinion.

He made you go through the awful experience of not being liked by this person, while still demanding that you maintain absolute attachment to him, while he could come and go as he pleased. This is like transferring all the risks in the relationship to you, which is just not fair.

I can imagine this is really tough for you.

I'm really sorry to say that this is not fair to you.

(2) Since the other person already has a new favorite, whether or not the relationship is confirmed, it would be really kind and respectful to both people involved to seriously say goodbye to the previous one and sort out the relationship itself. And he chose to lie.

I know you still can't let go of him, but your subconscious mind is still protecting you. In your statement, you mentioned that you told him that if the other person had someone new they liked, you would choose to cut off contact.

I really admire you for making this proposal, especially given the difficulties you've been facing.

But, sweetie, he doesn't deserve your kindness.

I just want you to understand that when you spend time with someone and start to feel good about them, and then you start to think about getting more serious, it all takes time.

From what you've told me, it seems like he was probably already looking for someone else when you suggested this plan. It's possible that you needed to chat and communicate before meeting. And given that he was in a single person setting, it's understandable that he felt confident about the new relationship until things settled down.

He didn't even let you know, sweetie. He even kept you hanging on, thinking you still had a chance.

In other words, he may have been seeing two people at the same time. He was greedy and wanted to take advantage of the love from multiple sources at the same time.

It's so sad to think that if you hadn't spoken to a friend, you might have ended up in a love triangle without even realising it. And he could have got away with it!

My dear friend,

Oh, don't you worry, sweetheart. None of this is your fault.

You haven't stopped anyone from being happy, though. In fact, he's the one who started it all. He only thought about himself and his own interests, and he chose to deceive you.

This is enough to show that this person is a bit of a hypocrite. It seems like the only person they love is themselves.

Oh, we don't even dare to think about it! If he had tasted the benefits of being loved by both sides, would he have kept it a secret forever? I'm so glad you learned the truth about him before things got any worse!

Secondly, please don't be too hard on yourself for not seeing him clearly in the past. It's okay to make mistakes!

I totally get it. We'll all have dizzy moments in our lives and we'll probably regret falling into certain traps. We'll probably even wonder why we weren't more vigilant in the first place! At that time, the power of self-examination will probably make things even more painful, almost like a punishment.

My dear friend,

Please, be more lenient with yourself, my dear friend.

My dear friend, you've already had a hard time.

Please, don't take on any responsibilities you don't have to.

Love is not Bluetooth, my dear friend.

It's not something you should share, sweetheart.

It's so important to recognize that the other person is trying to shift the blame onto you. They want you to feel like the little bit of care you get from them is something to be grateful for. Unfortunately, they've distorted the relationship into one where they're in the high position. They can sit back and relax while they treat their love as a scarce resource for the other two people to fight over.

This is a sign that he has some extreme narcissistic tendencies. He's trying to make you feel bad about yourself and make you feel guilty.

It's so important to be careful in these situations because the other person might be trying to manipulate your emotions.

3. Based on your situation, I'd love to offer you some suggestions that I hope will be helpful.

(1) It might be a good idea to cut the ties for a while. We need some time to adapt and face it.

If we keep getting tangled up with them, we'll probably end up in a relationship. It's important to realize that this kind of relationship can be risky for us. I get it. We were once in love and dependent on each other. It'll be tough to adapt, and it'll be hard to break free from the inertia and longing for the intimacy we once had.

But this may seem like a sweet thing, but it's actually poison.

It's so important to take care of yourself right now. It's time to focus on your own happiness and rebuild your boundaries. You've got this! You can do it! You'll be amazed at how much better you feel when you stop connecting with this person and try not to pay attention to everything about him.

This is just a little bit of self-care!

(2) Give yourself permission to be happy first, distract yourself, and enjoy your own life.

I know you're going through a lot right now. It's natural to feel the pain of a breakup. We tend to look at the other person's situation and it's hard not to. But it can also lead to internal conflict. This can make it hard to sleep and affect our emotions.

So, the first thing we should do is take care of ourselves. It's okay to feel sad or angry. But remember, this relationship isn't going to last forever. It might be over already.

It's so important to learn to make peace with yourself. You need to recuperate now, my dear.

We can try going out and enjoying the beautiful scenery, letting nature heal us, watching our favorite movies and books, and enjoying the warmth of life. We can also give love and care to those who really care about us.

It's so important to love yourself before you love others.

You deserve all the best, my friend.

3. Please take care of yourself mentally and consider talking to a professional counselor.

My dear friend, your world has been hit by a storm.

It's totally normal to feel a bit down or anxious after going through something traumatic. If you're struggling to cope, it might be helpful to chat with a mental health professional or try regular counseling. They can help you work through your feelings in a safe and supportive environment.

Because when we're hurting, our minds can get in the way of us understanding our feelings. That's where talking to someone can help. It can help you understand your thoughts, express your feelings in a safe space, and help you feel less anxious.

I can see that you still have endless power within you, which is your own wonderful psychological resource. You are so brave and admirable for writing down this problem.

It's a wonderful time of new opportunities!

That's all I can say for now!

I just wanted to say a big, heartfelt thank you for reading!

I wish you all the very best!

Hi, I'm Liu Quanyan, a listening therapist.

Please, don't hesitate to talk to me.

Hello, question asker!

From your description, I can feel the anger, grievance, and helplessness in your heart. At the same time, you have a very good ability to perceive these uncomfortable emotions, and it is great that you are brave enough to face them.

From your description, I know you are a very brave girl. You have shown incredible strength in facing these challenges alone, and you deserve better.

Let me be clear: this is not your fault. You did the right thing by noticing it in time and breaking off contact.

This is something many people cannot do. You will suffer, but you will survive.

I want you to know that time will heal your heart.

All problems are our resources, and all problems help us grow. We are experts at solving our own problems. Based on your description and my feelings, I am going to give you some suggestions that I know will help.

First of all, I know you are very sad, and anyone would feel angry and aggrieved. You need to release and vent your emotions through more exercise. When we exercise, our brains secrete dopamine, which produces a sense of pleasure and can help us release these uncomfortable emotions.

Secondly, you must accept these uncomfortable emotions and endure this period of discomfort since you have already made the decision.

Do your own thing. Distract yourself with something you enjoy or use positive mental suggestions and meditation exercises to calm your mind. This will help.

Don't label yourself. Love yourself. Respect your feelings. Set boundaries. Protect yourself. When we learn to love ourselves, we can love and be loved. We won't miss out on true happiness. We'll have the strength to stop people from hurting us.

And then, you must learn to let go. You may think you are very brave, but it makes you feel uncomfortable and aggrieved to see your sincere efforts come to nothing.

You can do this. Learn to let go in life. Don't fall into a cycle of negative emotions. Don't let them create mental depletion. You will get through this. Believe in yourself. Believe that time will be the best proof.

If you're still struggling, you can seek help. Talk to a good friend, go for a walk, take a trip, or find a professional counselor. They can help you heal and learn to love yourself again.

Dear Question Asker, Thank you for your inquiry. Best regards, [Name]

I have read your written communication.

I informed him that his actions were unacceptable and he responded by stating that I did not appreciate the opportunities his friends had mentioned, that I lacked an appreciation for things, and that he would never mention me again.

I empathize with your situation. Despite the actions of your former partner, you still value the opportunity. It's surprising that he believes he's entitled to such treatment.

I must ask whether this is not simply adding to the difficulties of the New Year. I appreciate the frustration you are experiencing. Please accept my hug.

As a fellow woman, I empathize with the nuances of female behavior in romantic relationships. Reading your account, I recognize similarities in our circumstances. When he expressed disinterest two months ago, you still opted to remain in the relationship. I recall feeling a sense of injustice at the time. However, I understand that if I were in your position or if I were younger, I would have likely made the same decision. Given the circumstances, there was no clear alternative to move forward. Otherwise, the situation would have been extremely challenging to navigate. Only by releasing your attachment to the relationship and exploring other options could you have potentially reversed the outcome.

In less than two months, his true character has already begun to emerge. It is unlikely that he will choose to stay together simply because we are warm-hearted, gentle, and kind. He may even feel disgusted by our personality. He may be more willing to challenge something new. This man is difficult to figure out. If you meet a similar man again, he will make people even more helpless.

At the outset of the relationship, we informed him of our positive attributes, our feelings for him, and our intention to terminate the relationship in the event that he formed a new partnership. However, we ultimately chose to accommodate his actions. He failed to fulfill his commitments, and when we discovered this, he was uncooperative and accused us of lacking appreciation for him. This led to a significant degree of frustration, and we sought an outlet to express our concerns.

It is within our rights to feel angry if we so choose. How can a relationship of more than a year just end so easily? We women can say that sometimes a relationship goes in slowly, but it also goes out slowly. Unlike men, whose relationships come quickly and go quickly, we must be aware of our own character traits and avoid making things difficult for ourselves. Allow us a period of sadness and pain, and we will heal the wounds ourselves.

Now that the Spring Festival is upon us, it is an ideal time to visit friends and family and take a break from the stress of work. We propose that we catch up with friends and family, and then take a vacation to a distant destination, even if it is just by yourself. We suggest going somewhere where you are unknown and observing the mountains and sea from afar. Nature can be a powerful healer.

I have posed a question to you via this channel, and I can see that your thinking is very clear, and your writing is quite good. I believe the most useful thing I can do is to first use paper and pen to write out all the pent-up emotions in my heart. When writing with paper and pen, it is okay, but when you are angry, press the pen harder. This will allow your emotions to be released. I will write from the bottom of my heart. After I finish, even if I can burn it all and let it drift away with the water, that would be fine. This is also a very good way to immediately and readily release your emotions.

I believe that when you initially received the news, you were taken aback. However, with a degree of composure, you will undoubtedly identify a solution to navigate this period of your life with greater equanimity and insight.

I am confident that you will succeed. The future will undoubtedly bring you good fortune. The world and I support you!

Hello! I see that he said he didn't like you, but he still maintained a close relationship. You must really love him very much! Even though you know you may be separated at any time, you are willing to fall.

You made the great decision to delete him, but you are still feeling a little angry. I can feel your frustration and anger, and I'm here to help!

You feel like you have no bottom line because you're still close with him and helping him get to know his next girlfriend. He's not telling you that he's fallen for someone else, but he's mentioning you and his new crush in his circle of friends. You think that's a crappy thing to do, but he thinks you don't cherish him.

I can say with confidence that he is really scum, and it's none of your business. Last night I saw an incredible TikTok video of former 101 contestant Wang Qing, in which she talked about having been in two relationships in the past, both of which ended with the other person cheating. She always couldn't help but get teary-eyed when talking about this, which shows that cheating by a partner really brings a lot of trauma.

When a relationship is about to end, it's time to get excited! You have the chance to prepare yourself mentally in advance and face the reality rationally. If you can't accept the reality, no problem! You can relieve the painful emotions in your heart through other means, such as travel, shopping, reading, watching movies, etc. In short, you get to distract yourself!

However, don't push yourself too hard to distract yourself, as this may have the opposite effect. If you have decided to break up, don't keep hanging on — it's time to move on to bigger and better things!

When a relationship ends, it often takes a while to calm down. This is totally normal! Give yourself the time you need to grieve. Accept your emotions.

It's a great idea to avoid contacting such a person. Shift your focus from him to yourself instead!

You are not wrong for still having feelings for him! You are still valuable, even if things don't work out. You are a wonderful, unique person, and you have so much to offer the world!

A while ago, there was a popular bgm in TikTok that I just loved! I don't know the name of the song, but it was the one that said, "There's a reason why God made you miss the one you love." Isn't it great that some people can miss someone, because it means they're not that great!

Guess what! The name of the person I once liked is still in my input method. And occasionally, when I type in a word with the same initials, it will pop up! But there are no more waves in my heart. He was also the person who could make me feel so bad that I wanted to throw up.

Time will eventually smooth everything over, and I really hope the same for you!

Hello! I see your question and confusion. I'll answer your question from the following points.

First, take a step back and understand your current feelings and state of mind towards your boyfriend. It seems like you're both angry and entangled and unable to let go. In this situation, it's even more important to keep a clear head and be aware of what's going on. It'd be helpful to figure out what stage your feelings for your boyfriend are at. Based on what you've said, it seems like they haven't reached the stage of marriage. In my opinion, for a woman, any relationship that isn't aimed at marriage will always feel insecure. While marriage isn't necessarily a guarantee of a relationship, it's difficult to feel at home in a relationship without it. Personally, I value the feeling of home, and the feelings given by family and lovers are different. So, if the two of you have been together for a long time without talking about marriage, what's the point of maintaining this relationship? It's worth exploring and thinking about. Do you have any common goals and values to pursue together?

If you're able to complement and appreciate each other, then you can maintain the relationship. If you're draining each other, then ask yourself: if you leave him, do you have a chance to become better? And if you leave him, will he become better?

2. What are you really concerned about? Is it that you can't live without him, or that he's still seeing other girls while maintaining an ambiguous relationship with you? Which of these matters more to you? If you're worried about your own feelings, then in his eyes you're obviously worthless.

If you don't respect yourself and give yourself value, you can't expect others to give you value. If you care about him dating other girlfriends at the same time, you have to ask yourself whether you should let this happen to save his feelings or end the relationship and start over with someone better.

Move on from the past. He can have a new girlfriend, and you can meet someone who loves you more. Your attachment to him will only get in the way of you meeting someone who's better for you.

Hello, I'm Zeyu.

"My boyfriend has moved on to the next girl. What should I do?" If this happened to someone else, we might say, "It will pass. Forget about him and move on." But when it happens to us, everything changes.

Reality: What other people say is not wrong, and we understand why they say it. But it is easy to say than to do. It is normal to feel any emotions from liking someone to breaking up, especially after being broken up with. If we don't let ourselves feel these emotions, it is unfair to ourselves. Therefore, the first thing we do is allow ourselves to feel pain, sadness, and grief. After trying to accept these emotions, we let them out through reasonable channels to reduce our burden.

Reality has already happened. We shouldn't blame ourselves for not seeing the other person sooner. We can't predict the future or read people's minds. We can only make the right choice at the right time. We may regret our actions, but we haven't done anything wrong.

We don't have to forget this experience. We can't forget it completely, but we can seal it away. But doing so will hurt us.

This relationship may have failed, but we are also lucky. This kind of luck comes from seeing the true face of the other party. Seeing the true face of the other party and seeing through the actions of a person in a relationship. These experiences are painful, but this does not prove that we are a victim. We will become a better version of ourselves and meet someone more suitable for us.

A relationship ending doesn't mean the end of our lives. We'll meet someone better. We can't change the past, but we can use what we learned from it to start a new chapter.

Hello, question asker.

It is understandable that you might experience some negative emotions when your boyfriend moves on to the next girl.

I hope you will find it helpful to have some thoughts to refer to.

Emotionally, it is important to recognize that the prospect of a breakup is a natural part of life. The key is to minimize the trauma caused by the breakup and the "seamless connection" with your boyfriend, and to find a way to move out of your current negative emotional state as soon as possible.

The questioner describes some situations and psychological experiences, such as "I must admit that I was not as principled as I should have been, and I helped him seamlessly get his next girlfriend," "I should have rejected all intimate behavior when he first mentioned that he didn't like it," and "I realize now that such behavior is not acceptable."

It would seem that this experience has had an impact on your sense of security.

Safety is a fundamental need, second only to physiological needs according to Maslow's hierarchy of needs. It is a very strong need. When the feeling of safety is affected, it can impact one's mood, leading to an objective judgment and evaluation of oneself and the surrounding environment, which can in turn give rise to negative emotions.

For instance, it can lead to feelings of persistent anger and anxiety, which may result in a sense of being "very bad" and "still very angry," with uncertainty about the next steps and the future direction.

It seems that, for whatever reason, after a person loses their love and breaks up, their psychological development is generally divided into several stages.

It would seem that the questioner is currently experiencing a period of elevated psychological pressure and uncertainty. It is not uncommon for the short-term impact of a relationship breakup to result in some changes in mood and the emergence of some irrational thoughts and ideas.

It is not uncommon after a breakup to feel reluctant to face reality, to find it difficult to believe in the fact of the breakup, and to try to maintain mental balance through denial.

With time, however, you will gradually come to terms with reality, rationally consider and analyze the facts of the breakup, and eventually come out of the shadow of the breakup.

Dealing with a breakup due to a failed relationship will require your own active efforts and time to digest.

It would be advisable to respect either party.

I would gently suggest that you avoid discussing your ex's privacy, regardless of the nature of your relationship with them. It is important to protect the past you have shared together.

It would also be helpful to understand your own boundaries.

I believe that maintaining an open and clear attitude will be beneficial in addressing this issue.

In light of these experiences, it might be helpful to consider that your relationship still has the potential to evolve in a positive way. However, it's also important to recognize that the possibility of a breakup is always present.

If there are any issues you would like to resolve with your ex, it might be helpful to communicate with him honestly and clearly define the boundaries. This could potentially help you establish a healthier relationship.

It might be helpful to consider that setting clear boundaries could assist you in dealing with this issue more effectively, while also demonstrating to your ex that you are a responsible person.

When you're feeling down, it can be helpful to talk to friends. It's also good to let off steam and relieve stress in whatever way works for you.

You might find it helpful to calm yourself down and think slowly about the causes and consequences, and reflect and summarize.

You might also consider learning more about the psychology of relationships and how that could help you to think and judge more wisely.

Another option for stress relief is comprehensive counseling with a professional counselor.

Ultimately, the most effective approach is to allow time to gradually help you to calm down, as it can be a very effective form of therapy.

I hope these suggestions are helpful for you.

Hello, question asker. I'm Gu Daoxi Feng Shou Lu, your Heart Exploration coach.

After reading the original poster's description, I feel angry and indignant. I feel the original poster is not worth it, but looking at it from another perspective, the original poster is lucky to have discovered it in time.

The questioner may be more grateful for the other person's appearance than the girl the other person is dating. This allowed him to see his boyfriend for who he really is. The other person's cheating may not be that bad. It allowed the questioner to stop the loss in time and be grateful for not marrying him.

The questioner said, "If you ever fall for someone, let me know, and I'll break up with him." This implies the other person doesn't value the questioner's devotion.

Unconditional tolerance can lead to betrayal.

I once read that how others treat you is something you approve of. This means the questioner may be able to learn from this failed relationship, such as being too kind and tolerant. Will this help the questioner feel better?

When I grew up, I noticed that if someone has their own way of thinking, no matter what you do, they will remain stuck in their own circle. This is why the questioner was at a loss for words in the process of arguing with him.

Some people feel entitled to be choosy because they think more people like them. This is also the logic behind his saying that the questioner should be grateful that he mentioned the questioner in his circle of friends.

The old saying goes, "A summer insect cannot talk about ice, and a well frog cannot talk about the sea." The modern saying goes, "Don't argue with a fool."

People with different views in a relationship will argue over small things like chores. It's better to end the relationship now than risk being unfaithful later.

Moving from a relationship to being alone is hard. It's not about love, but about attachment. If you're still dependent on someone after a breakup, they'll think you're still interested. This can be confusing and hurtful.

If someone you trust betrays you, you have to accept it and move on. Give yourself time to heal.

It's not rational to feel bad about someone who doesn't deserve it. It might even make them think they can get away with it. Forgiving others doesn't make you happy, but letting go of the past might help you move on.

The questioner may be feeling angry at the other person for their flaws. Sorting out your emotions can help you to vent them.

You deserve to be loved. Don't dwell on the past. Learn from your mistakes and move on.

Read Human Nature's Weaknesses, Review, It's Okay Not to Forgive, and Burns' New Emotion Therapy. These books can help you understand your emotions.

I'll give the questioner a hug and wish you well!

Dear question asker,

From your description, I can sense your inner feelings of grievance, anger, and helplessness. At the same time, you have a remarkable ability to perceive these uncomfortable emotions, and it is admirable that you are courageous enough to face them.

I empathize with the complex emotions and confusion you're experiencing. In our lives and our world, we will all encounter these uncomfortable emotions, but I believe that all problems help us grow.

I want to start by saying that it is not your fault, and your feelings are real. You have invested a lot of emotion in your relationship with him, and you are emotionally dependent on him, so you don't need to blame yourself.

Two months ago, he indicated that he was not as fond of you as he once was, but they did not end the relationship. He has always been quite attached to your emotional support.

You also respect his choice. When you found out that he was with someone else, you were able to decisively block him, even though it was painful.

I believe this is a way of protecting yourself and caring for yourself.

I can imagine this has been a difficult and painful experience for you. When he chose to be with another girl, he didn't communicate with you in time. His behavior could perhaps be perceived as immoral and disrespectful, and it may have caused you to question your true feelings for him.

I understand that you are experiencing a range of intense emotions, including anger, frustration, and sadness. These feelings are completely normal.

I want you to know that you are not at fault. It is important to try to accept and allow these emotions to exist. After all, you have given so much, and it is natural to want to take it back all at once. This is also a very difficult situation to navigate.

I want to tell you that time can help you to heal your wounds. I also want to tell you that you are not to blame. You don't need others to judge you. You are the master of your own emotions.

We all have the capacity to make ourselves happy.

Secondly, deleting him could be a way of protecting yourself and learning to love yourself again.

It is important to remember that you have the right to protect yourself from being hurt by others. It seems that his verbal attack on you is a pattern of his own self-protection after you exposed his lies.

It is important to remember that you have the right to defend your own interests and to seek an ethical relationship with boundaries and equality.

Finally, when you feel down, you might consider taking up an activity you enjoy. You could also try venting your emotions by exercising more or talking to friends, or you might want to think about seeking professional psychological counseling for help. The most important thing is to give yourself time and space to accept reality, heal your heart, and then look forward, believing that a better future is waiting for you.

We all deserve to be loved by someone who gives their all to us, who loves us, respects us, trusts us, and treats us as equals.

Dear Questioner, My name is Duoduo Lian, and I hope my reply will be of assistance to you.

You have been in a relationship with your boyfriend for over a year and value the connection you have built. He is also able to communicate his intention to end the relationship with you, and you accept this and are willing to withdraw. When this occurs, you experience confusion, anger, and self-hatred for your lack of position in the situation, as well as resentment towards the other person's character. It is a challenging situation.

In this relationship, you feel passive. People are attracted to you. You expect the other person to be by your side. You say you don't care, but what kind of feeling does that give to the other person? The other person already has you under control. If he wants something, just go for it. But you have no boundaries, no position. You are attracted to the other person's behavior. Do you agree?

Do you believe that your generosity will win back your boyfriend's affections? What advantages do you possess that attract the other person? When the other person is not as desirable as you want, you may even attack the other person. Your boyfriend has also informed you in advance that he is constantly testing you, and you constantly cater to your boyfriend. What is the other person's perception of this dynamic?

Men are naturally inclined to assert their dominance over others. Individuals have the right to make their own choices. You are able to sense your boyfriend's changes, and it is quite normal to make friends. Outstanding individuals never lack friends. It depends on how the other person makes a choice. Your boyfriend also feels aggrieved that he has not confirmed the relationship with others. Do you agree?

It is important to manage expectations effectively. While expectations and disappointments are inevitable, it is preferable to transform expectations into requirements. After a year of collaboration, you have invested significant time and effort. When challenges arise, you can communicate your genuine thoughts to the other party. You have reservations, but you are not yet prepared to concede.

This occurrence also indicates the necessity for you to assume a dominant role in the relationship, safeguard your interests, refrain from compromising your principles, and cultivate relationships with others on an independent basis, maintaining boundaries and the capacity to tolerate others, in order to ensure the relationship's longevity.

Do you want the other person to stay with you because you truly love them, or because you enjoy being loved? You are aware of the answer to this question. Do you believe it is worthwhile to pay for the mistakes of others? It is essential to love yourself and meet your needs. You deserve to have a good life.

I extend my sympathies to you.

Hello, I'm listening.

Hug you. You have been wronged, and it hurts too much.

I can feel the love of a year, and the man suddenly saying he doesn't like it. It came as a shock to you, and you don't want to believe it's true. You want to keep him, and you're going to promise him all kinds of intimate acts.

You only woke up from your dream when you heard from someone else that he had someone else he liked and was going to meet them. You feel betrayed.

You regret not breaking up with him decisively enough, and you still have intimate gestures with him. You hate his heartlessness and seamless connection.

He is condescendingly accusing you of not cherishing the opportunity for him to mention you in his circle of friends, which makes you feel belittled. You know you are not worthless, so you are angry that you were abandoned. You feel like a mistress. You regret having been blindsided.

Your heart hurts.

Here's the advice you need to hear:

1. Accept the facts.

Admit it. The one-time lover no longer loves you. Your previous efforts have come to nothing. This relationship has caused you great pain. You were wrong about the person. Accept the truth. Accept that this relationship has hurt you and caused you pain. Then, face the present and face the pain head-on.

2. It's not your fault, so don't blame yourself.

I can feel the deep self-blame in your description, but you don't blame him. Why not? What is it that stops you from expressing this hatred?

This man is half-hearted and indecisive in his treatment of relationships. He gives you hope and engages in intimate acts with you even though he himself has said that he doesn't like it. And in the end, he betrays you.

This is his problem, not yours.

3. Learn from experience and establish clear boundaries.

You must distinguish between your affairs, his affairs, and God's affairs. The principle is simple: whoever is responsible is responsible for what is theirs.

You can only control yourself, not him. Learn from this experience and avoid getting hurt again.

4. Change your mindset: Everything that happens is for the best.

When something happens, look at it from a dialectical perspective. His departure was only for a year, which was fortunate. It took a year to see what kind of person he really was, and there was no more time cost, which is a good thing.

He'll be replaced by someone who treats you better, so you should be happy you got out while you could. A year is nothing compared to what you've got coming.

4. Build self-confidence and expand your circle of friends.

Use small successes to build your self-confidence. Give yourself more certainty and encouragement.

Let me be clear: his abandonment is his loss, not yours.

5. Speak your mind.

You are clearly upset about this relationship, and you need to express your feelings. You feel like the third party, but you are not. You need to speak up and share your anger and emotions.

I will listen and I will understand.

Hello, question asker. My name is Evan, and I'm a counselor with the Jingliu school.

From the description provided, it seems that the questioner is experiencing a range of negative emotions, including sadness, resentment, disappointment, frustration, and sadness. It is understandable that it may be challenging to forget and move on immediately in the face of such a situation.

The questioner feels that she was emotionally betrayed by her boyfriend. It is natural to feel sad when an intimate relationship comes to an end. When the questioner saw her boyfriend seamlessly move on with another girl, she felt that her efforts in the previous relationship were not worthwhile and that she was unappreciated.

Everyone wants their intimate relationship to be valued by their intimate partner and to be unique. However, the way the questioner's ex-boyfriend acted made it easy to feel that the questioner was a mistress and a spare tire, which is indeed quite outrageous.

How might one adjust one's mentality in the face of such a situation and emerge from this unpleasant experience in a more positive frame of mind? Here are some simple suggestions for the questioner:

It is important to accept the emotions that arise from the separation of an intimate relationship. Everyone experiences these emotions in different ways, and it is essential to allow yourself to feel whatever you are feeling.

It is important to recognize and accept your emotions. You have the right to feel angry and sad about the end of the relationship.

It is not necessary to forget immediately, but it is important to allow yourself to feel these emotions and learn to deal with them slowly. There are many ways to express and deal with these emotions, including keeping a diary, drawing, exercising, or other activities.

It is important to learn to let go, even if you are still feeling a range of emotions. It is not helpful to dwell on the relationship, as this can make your ex feel more confident and in control. It is a valuable learning experience to reflect on what you can improve in your own behaviour in the relationship.

For instance, the questioner mentioned that she still maintained a close relationship with her ex-boyfriend even though she was aware that the relationship could potentially end at any time. This may give the impression that there is no clear limit to what you are willing to accept. It is important to remember that everyone is likely to make mistakes or make decisions that may seem irrational in the context of a relationship.

It would be beneficial to learn to let go and grow from this experience, and to set clearer boundaries for yourself.

It may be helpful to talk to friends and family about how you feel and to seek their support. You might like to share your feelings with them and let them show you their care and encouragement.

They may be able to provide some comfort and advice to help you get through this difficult time. Their support could help you feel warm and strong, and assist you in better facing this challenging period.

It is important to maintain your boundaries and avoid getting involved in your ex's games. This will help ensure that things don't end badly.

Perhaps it would have been helpful to recognize that your ex was not truly interested in being in a relationship with you when he seemed to play with your heart. Learning to set boundaries can be a good way to protect yourself and avoid getting caught up in multiple relationships.

It would be beneficial for the questioner to recognize their good fortune in having extricated themselves from the situation in a timely manner.

It may be helpful for the questioner to focus on themselves, invest in personal growth, and take care of themselves. Participating in new activities, learning new skills, or restarting old hobbies could potentially help the questioner rebuild their confidence and sense of self-worth.

It might also be helpful to try to find things that can make the questioner feel happy and fulfilled. For example, spending time with friends could be beneficial. Socialising can distract the questioner from the distress of the ex-boyfriend, enhance self-esteem, and help them to move on from the situation. These experiences could gradually help the questioner come out of the gloom and rediscover the joy of life.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider learning to forgive. From some perspectives, the behavior of the author's ex-husband could be perceived as somewhat immature and irresponsible. His attitude may not fully align with the author's values, but it is important to recognize that it should not be the primary focus of your emotions.

I would gently suggest to the questioner that their value is not defined by their attitude, but by themselves. It may be helpful to consider forgiving him and forgiving yourself.

Forgiving does not mean forgetting or accepting misconduct. Rather, it is a process of releasing oneself from emotional burdens.

Time is often the best medicine for emotional wounds. It may take a while to forget someone, but it's important to remember that the questioner deserves better love and healthier relationships.

It may be helpful to allow yourself some time and space to gradually work through your feelings, and to trust that the person who asked the question will emerge from this experience with a sense of happiness that truly belongs to them.

It is my sincere hope that my answer will be of some help to the questioner.