How to determine whether a counseling relationship is good or bad?

Good day, question asker. I am Enoch, the designated answer provider.

The client elected to pursue counseling with the assistance of his parents due to depressive symptoms he was experiencing during his senior year of high school. After undergoing counseling, the client felt that the investment was worthwhile. However, he lacked the ability to assess the quality of the counseling relationship and his suitability for such a relationship.

In fact, the questioner has gained a great deal from this relationship. However, over time, due to the harm done to him by his family, he has become suspicious of people and relationships in general. This has led him to question whether the positive counseling relationship is genuinely beneficial.

The questioner views counseling as an act of vulnerability, akin to "going to the hospital to expose myself," rather than a means of healing. This perception leads to the questioner's belief that his parents do not truly believe in his depression and are merely attempting to expose his disguise with ill intent. Consequently, the questioner resists counseling. However, during the counseling process, the questioner observed the counselor's friendliness and experienced a sense of healing. Despite this positive experience, the questioner's doubts about the counselor and the relationship persisted, mirroring his mother's initial skepticism. This led to the questioner questioning the authenticity of the counselor and the relationship.

This is a projection of one's feelings for one's parents onto the counselor in the counseling relationship. Even if the other person is very nice, one still feels that the other person is a kind of disguise, so one can create resistance to the counselor and the counseling relationship. Resistance can destroy the counseling relationship and is not conducive to counseling. Therefore, the questioner should eliminate their suspicious mentality and bravely accept the counselor in order to bring better help to themselves.

It is my hope that the questioner will be able to overcome their doubts, demonstrate active cooperation, and facilitate their own healing process.

Hello!

Many people have the wrong idea about psychological counseling. I used to think that if you have an unsolvable problem, a counselor can help. If you have such hopes, I'm afraid you will be disappointed.

Psychological counseling is a journey where the counselor and client work together to understand themselves better. The counselor listens to the client and helps them with techniques when needed. The client also needs to make personal efforts.

The counseling relationship is a two-way street.

Good counseling is when the client has a positive experience and gets what they need.

A good counseling relationship:

1. You will feel good.

You will feel comfortable and at ease. You will feel like you have gained something and gained some deep insights. You can open up and tell the counselor whatever you want to say. You will feel very comfortable and secure.

2. Better self-esteem

A good counselor helps you see things more positively.

A good counseling relationship is comfortable, warm, and safe. You trust the person in front of you and feel understood.

Best wishes!