I feel like my husband is driving me crazy, and I want to kill myself to get relief. Should I get a divorce?

Hello, dear question asker! As I read about your internal struggle, I could almost feel the heaviness and helplessness you must be feeling.

I know you're tired, but please believe that there's a gentle force supporting you, even when you feel like you can't go on.

I know that feeling of being so overwhelmed that you want to escape, and even have extreme thoughts. But please remember that these emotions are only temporary and they cannot define you. You are so much more than this!

You are so strong and beautiful, and these emotions don't define you.

Let's try to step out of this tricky situation and look at things from a different angle. Do you remember a time when you were close and things just clicked?

Maybe, in those lovely moments, you'll find the way to reconnect with each other. It's also important to remember that every relationship needs effort and tolerance from both people involved. It's worth looking for ways to improve things together.

In psychology, self-care is seen as a really powerful inner resource. It teaches us how to treat ourselves gently, comfort and support ourselves in difficult situations.

When you're feeling helpless, try some self-care techniques. They can be as simple as taking a hot bath, listening to a favorite song, or writing down your feelings. These seemingly simple actions can bring you unexpected warmth and strength.

It's totally normal to feel this way. It's possible that what you're really looking for is understanding, respect, or a different way of looking at things. Identifying these core issues and trying to communicate with your partner in depth is the key to solving the problem.

Remember to be patient and open-minded when communicating. Listen to the other person's point of view with kindness and be brave enough to express your own feelings.

I hope these suggestions help! Please feel free to reach out if you have any other questions.

1. Keep an emotional diary: Take a few minutes each day to record your emotional changes and the events that trigger them. This is a great way to gain a clearer understanding of your needs and prepare for subsequent communication.

2. Take a little "cooling-off period": When a conflict arises, it's a great idea to agree to temporarily stop arguing and calm down on your own. You can use this time to engage in relaxing activities such as deep breathing, taking a walk, or meditation.

3. Attend marriage counseling together: Find a professional marriage therapist or counselor and attend marriage counseling sessions together. It's so helpful to have a third party who can guide you through things and help you understand each other better.

4. Develop personal interests: It's a great idea to develop some personal interests and hobbies outside of your marriage. This will not only make you feel valuable and attractive, but it will also breathe new life into your relationship!

5. Set family rules: It's a great idea to discuss and set some family rules with your partner. You could agree to respect each other's personal space and have regular emotional exchanges. These rules can really help maintain family harmony and stability.

6. Get some help from your friends and family. They're there for you, so don't be afraid to share your feelings with them. They'll be there for you when you need them the most!

Dear friend, We all have the right to choose our own path when faced with a difficult situation. And remember, no matter which way you choose to move forward, you are strong and wise.

You have the power to change the situation, and you deserve a relationship full of love and respect. I hope you find inner peace and happiness in the days to come.

Hello, I'm Xintan Coach Fei You. Life is a beautiful journey, and it's so important to appreciate all the wonderful things it has to offer.

I'm here for you, my friend. I don't know exactly what happened, but I can feel your sadness, frustration, loneliness, and helplessness. Take a deep breath and calm your emotions. This will help you to once again activate your original wisdom and show you the way.

1. Looking back at the specific events that triggered these emotions, you can see your intimate relationship patterns.

You say that your husband "drives you crazy," which I'm sure is not true!

A great intimate relationship is all about equality, trust, and mutual respect. When you have a relationship like this, it's a win-win! You can nourish each other, grow together, and share the happiness of mutual love.

It's so sad when you feel like you're being driven crazy by someone you love. It shows that you're passive in the relationship and that he doesn't understand, trust, recognize, or respect you. It also reveals a pattern in your relationship: one party controls the other, and effective communication is impossible.

It's so important to communicate everything! You're feeling driven crazy by him, which shows that in your relationship, he is the dominant party and you are the passive party. The other party is completely denying you opportunities or the right to speak and choose.

It's so sad when you feel so many negative emotions, to the point where you hurt yourself. It's because in such an "unequal" relationship, you can't express your emotions, even anger. You suppress it and attack it internally (self-harm).

How on earth did you end up where you are now? It's okay, we've all been there! Relationships are patterns of interaction that develop between two parties. Although the other person is responsible for the outcome, you in the relationship can also be responsible for changing the outcome. The "responsibility" here emphasizes the ability to change the outcome.

For example, in response to his attitude, what changes can you make? If you have previously submitted to his attitude, then you can absolutely express your own views and feelings! You can even gain support from family members and outside sources.

2. Take a moment to think about what it is about this relationship that is draining you. This can help you to see what you really want, and it might be a good idea to write it down!

You asked, "Should I or shouldn't I get a divorce?" Well, the answer to that question is something only you can know. Marriage is a matter between two people, just like wearing shoes, only you know if they fit.

But the question "should or shouldn't" can make you feel lonely and helpless, as well as disappointed and even desperate. My dear, let's rephrase the question: should we get a divorce?

You can feel it, I know you can! Can you feel the difference in the power of just one word?

"To" or "not to" reflects your right to choose. You always have a choice, and that's something to be grateful for! The author of "Living a Meaningful Life" was in a Nazi concentration camp, but he was still sunny and optimistic. He had a choice: he could face it happily or spend the day depressed.

You are capable of taking responsibility for the outcome of the change. You have the power to choose! You can end the relationship, change the way you get along with each other, or change yourself. In short, you have the remote control of life, so take it back courageously!

I really believe that the question of whether or not you should divorce will not become a problem for you, and the other person will not be able to hurt you. Why? Because you know that the most important thing is to love yourself more.

I really hope this helps you, and I just want you to know that the world and I love you.

If you'd like to keep in touch, I'd love for you to visit my personal website, Heart Exploration Service.

Good morning, my name is Jane.

First and foremost, I empathize with your situation. It is undoubtedly distressing when such circumstances arise within a family.

The original poster is seeking guidance on whether to pursue a divorce. The decision requires a thoughtful assessment of personal values and circumstances. It may be helpful to consider whether continuing the current situation is aligned with your long-term goals and aspirations.

Do you wish to continue living in this manner?

It is important to note that the decision-making process often requires a significant investment of time. Allowing yourself the space to observe your life from a third-party perspective can be invaluable in this regard.

It is possible that you may discover how your husband's actions annoy you. Furthermore, you may find that you have nowhere to express your anger, which could ultimately result in self-harm.

If you were not directly involved, how would you assess the situation?

Please describe the changes you would like to implement.

Divorce is an option to consider. It is important to recognize that you have the ability to stop living this way.

An alternative lifestyle may not entail a complete 180-degree change, but it is nevertheless a viable option.

In business, it is not the fear itself that is of consequence. Rather, it is the decision made in the face of that fear that matters.

The reason you are considered brave is not because you ignore fear, but because you face it head-on.

Please describe the circumstances that led to the loss of control.

It is often recommended that one should trust one's instincts and follow them. However, if one loses control and becomes unhinged, it indicates that one's body and heart are rebelling, and one is experiencing a sense of hurt.

It would be more beneficial to take a step back and assess the situation calmly, rather than allowing frustration to affect your judgement.

Ultimately, I encourage you to heed your heart's guidance.

Good day, My name is Qi Ao, and I am a Heart Exploration coach.

Please accept my sincere condolences. I can sense that you are currently experiencing significant distress and suffering.

You have indicated that your husband is causing you significant distress, that you have lost control of your emotions on multiple occasions, that you have even begun to self-harm, and that you are so unhappy that you are considering divorce and seeking relief from your suffering. You are interested in learning more about the direction your relationship will take. Have circumstances reached a point where divorce is a viable option?

Have the issues been accumulating for an extended period?

Given the particularly painful nature of the marriage, what steps should be taken?

You have indicated that your husband's behavior causes you to experience emotional outbursts and suicidal ideation. Could you please elaborate on the nature of the conflict between you? Did you engage in a heated discussion?

Has he done something that you find unacceptable? It would be advisable to take a moment to calm down, take a deep breath, and relax. It is important to avoid acting impulsively and engaging in further negative conflict with him. It is also crucial to ensure that you do not engage in any actions that could cause you harm. It would be beneficial to address the issue together.

The decision to divorce is also a matter for the two of you. Once you have calmed down, you should communicate effectively with each other to determine the best course of action. Regardless of the severity of the issue, it can be addressed. Divorce may not be the only solution, but it is important to find a way to resolve your conflicts as soon as possible. The most crucial thing is to avoid any actions that could harm yourself.

The decision to end a marriage is a difficult one. It is important to consider all aspects of the situation before making a decision.

Psychology teaches us that the most important relationship is the one we have with ourselves, followed by our relationship with our spouse, and then the relationship between our spouse and our children. Regardless of whether you divorce or not, you must first learn to take care of yourself, pay attention to yourself, and love yourself well. There are two kinds of people who suffer the most in the world: those who should divorce but don't, and those who can't divorce and think about it every day. Ask yourself, have you really given up on this relationship and are you thinking only about divorce?

☀️Confront the issue directly: The worst has already occurred, so there is no room for further deterioration. Since avoidance is not an option, the most effective course of action is to address the issue head-on and resolve it. The solution is straightforward: If you are unable to manage your marriage effectively and your partner is unwilling to make any compromises, and the situation is causing you significant distress, your primary objective should be to prioritize your well-being, survival, and self-care. This will help you avoid engaging in self-destructive and self-harming behaviors. It is important to note that your partner's actions are unlikely to change unless you take the initiative to improve your own situation. By developing a stronger sense of self-love and resilience, you will become better equipped to handle the challenges that arise in your marriage.

☀️Open communication: If both parties are experiencing distress, the initial recommendation is to pursue a divorce and allow each individual to pursue their own happiness. If the relationship is consistently dissatisfying, it may be more beneficial to terminate the marriage as soon as possible to achieve true freedom. However, if there is still a foundation of affection, there may be an opportunity to salvage the marriage through open communication and a collaborative effort to identify solutions for a more fulfilling future.

Identify and address the issues in your marriage in a collaborative manner.

Listen to your heart. If you are unable to manage your marriage and lack the courage to make the decision to break up, you must accept responsibility for this situation. You are the source of all problems and also the key to all solutions. Do not take yourself too seriously, but also do not take yourself too lightly. It is crucial to listen to your heart. Instead of dwelling on negative thoughts about your husband or your circumstances, you must have the confidence to live your life well. Either you have the ability to change the other person, or you have the courage to leave him. You can work hard to manage a happy marriage, or you can live a high-quality single life on your own. The choice is yours. I believe you already have the answer in your heart, so you must face it bravely.

"The Meaning of Marriage" posits that marriage is the most painful and most wonderful interpersonal relationship. The core of it is still love. We must be a source of strength for each other, embrace and appreciate each other. This is the mystery of marriage. If there is only mutual disgust, what is left of marriage? In any relationship, your own emotions and feelings are the most important.

I hope my response is helpful to you. If you require further communication, you may follow me (click on my personal homepage), select the Heart Exploration service, and communicate with me directly. Best regards, [Name]

Hello, my name is Tongyan.

From what you have told me, it seems that you and your husband have experienced some challenges in your marriage. On several occasions, your husband has pushed you to the point of losing control, and you have even considered suicide as a way of escaping. You are unsure whether you want a divorce.

From your description, I'm not sure exactly what happened between you and your husband, or what your interaction pattern is like. I'm not certain what happened when you said your husband pushed you out of control a few times.

I couldn't help but notice that when your husband pushed you to the point of losing control, you would have thoughts of wanting to commit suicide to relieve yourself, and you also engaged in self-injury and self-harm.

I'm not sure when you first started self-harming. Could you tell me what happened at the time?

Could you please tell me how you resolved the matter afterwards? Is anyone around you aware of this?

If I might make a suggestion, I believe that your primary focus at this time should be on learning to manage your emotions rather than on making a decision about divorce.

I'm not sure if you ever had thoughts of self-harm or suicide because of certain things that happened when you were growing up.

Could you please clarify what you're trying to relieve yourself of?

In addition to these thoughts and behaviors in your marriage, have you ever experienced similar suicidal thoughts or self-harming behaviors in other relationships or situations?

It might be helpful to consider dealing with your emotions and exploring the roots of your reactions before making the decision to get a divorce.

Could I ask you to consider why, when you have a conflict with your husband, you choose to harm yourself or to seek relief and face the conflict on your own, rather than choosing another way? It might be helpful to think about what is preventing you from making other choices.

You may find it helpful to talk to someone about your current situation. It could be a friend, a family member, or someone else you trust. Having someone there to offer support and understanding can be really beneficial.

You may find it helpful to seek the guidance of a psychologist or engage in psychotherapy.

It might be helpful to try to record the kind of stressful conditions under which you may have thoughts of self-harm or wanting to escape.

Given the circumstances, it would be advisable to avoid returning to that environment as much as possible and to seek a more supportive and comfortable environment.

If you are feeling distressed, it is advisable to contact the person you feel most comfortable with, whether that be your parents, a close friend, or someone else.

If you feel you need to talk to someone, you can also call the helpline: 24-hour toll-free crisis intervention hotline: 010-82951332; 800-810-1117 (Beijing Huilongguan Hospital Psychological Crisis Intervention and Research Center).

I hope this finds you well.