If you don't feel cared for, how can you be happy in a marriage?

Greetings.

My name is Kelly, and together we will examine and exchange ideas about how couples should interact in a marriage.

The question thus arises as to whether it is possible to achieve a state of happiness within the context of a marriage if one does not feel cared for.

Given our profound affection for each other, we are acutely aware of his concerns. In a marriage, seemingly inconsequential matters can have profound implications over time, gradually unveiling the true nature of one's partner.

There is no universally applicable answer to the question of how to achieve happiness. The answer is inherently subjective and resides within the individual.

There are numerous avenues for achieving a state of happiness.

For example, one might consider reducing the amount of attention paid to one's partner and instead directing it towards one's own needs and desires.

When individuals care about themselves, love themselves, and are more aware of themselves, do their interactions in marriage differ from those prior to this shift in perspective? It is recommended that individuals engage in activities that bring them happiness.

Or should one endeavor to further acquaint oneself with one's partner?

It would be beneficial to ascertain his preferences.

It would be beneficial to consider the emotional state of the individual in question.

One might inquire whether it is reasonable to expect one's partner to love them.

Prior to being able to love others, it is essential to cultivate self-love.

2: Reestablish your social network, identify new interests, or reconnect with a previous close friend from before the wedding. This will help you to regain a sense of independence and contentment.

3. It is advisable to lower expectations.

It is important to recognize that your husband is an ordinary individual with the same needs for appreciation and encouragement as anyone else. If you were to experience back pain, for instance, you would likely seek the guidance of a chiropractor.

It is possible that some of the pain experienced by the husband in question is not fully comprehensible to him, and that it is not necessarily indicative of a lack of love on his part.

4: Communicate more. In couple mode, it is possible to gain insight into each other's families of origin. It may be the case that we have learned many of the strengths and weaknesses of our parents, and that we have unknowingly become like them in our marriage. This can be a subject for awareness.

One may also consider reading "Nonviolent Communication." For instance, when one's spouse indicates that they are in a negative emotional state, it may be beneficial to take a moment to calm oneself and engage in a calm and respectful dialogue. One might, for instance, inquire of one's spouse to serve as a mirror, allowing oneself to gain insight into the emotional state. This approach may prove beneficial for both parties and may also serve to strengthen the relationship.

Furthermore, it is possible to discern whether there has been any alteration in the attitude of the husband in question. Should there be evidence of advancement, it would be advisable to maintain communication.

It is recommended that the aforementioned information be conveyed to one's husband and that a discussion be held regarding one's feelings and expectations.

It is essential for couples to engage in cooperative efforts to enhance their mutual understanding and foster continuous improvement. This process of growth and development is a collaborative endeavor that requires both partners to contribute and evolve together.

5: It is imperative to maintain honesty and transparency within the marital relationship. In the event of discord, it is crucial to communicate one's expectations to one's partner in a constructive manner.

Furthermore, it is advisable to offer encouragement and praise to the other person for their positive attributes.

6: Couples should engage in activities together, such as watching a movie, going out to dinner, or meeting up with friends, in order to increase the number of shared experiences and enhance their mutual understanding.

7: A positive and mutually respectful intimate relationship will also result in increased affection between the couple. If there are difficulties in communication between the husband and wife, or if the couple's sex life is causing distress, it may be helpful to seek the guidance of a professional counselor.

A lack of harmony in a couple's relationship can have a detrimental effect on the relationship over time.

8: Adopt an optimistic and cheerful disposition, devote attention to your own happiness, and remind yourself daily of the gravity of the situation, the fact that many people are unable to enjoy the company of their families, unemployed, and that what you have may be a source of hope for many others.

9: It is recommended that couples identify and acknowledge their partner's positive attributes in a timely manner. This approach may yield observable outcomes by the end of the month.

Therefore, happiness is a matter of personal choice.

If one is prudent, one may persist in posing queries if such a course of action is necessary for effective communication.

The world and I extend our affectionate regard to you.

Dear colleague, I empathize with you after reading your statement. Let's collaborate on how to respond.

1. Your husband is pretty straightforward. When you're upset, you expect him to show you care, give you a hug, and say, "I can help you feel better." But he doesn't know how, and thinks you want a solution. He just says, "If you're not happy, leave. I can't do anything if you feel that way." It really makes people feel upset!

He might not realize that men and women have different expectations in a marriage, and he might not be very good at expressing them. I suggest that you communicate with him well and directly express your most intuitive needs, for example: "I'm so tired from work today. I want to go home and relax. Can you hug me, rub my shoulders, and then we can chat together?" For that kind of straightforward man, it's best to state a direct and executable request so that he knows how to respond and won't accidentally enter a situation where he has to make a decision.

2. If your marriage is not as harmonious as you'd like and you're feeling a bit down and exhausted...

This is also something that requires communication and exchange. There's no need to be shy about talking about it. You can discuss how to make adjustments after each time, what you want, how to cooperate better, etc., so that it will better promote the flow of emotions.

It's not realistic to expect to understand each other on a soul level or to understand each other with just a glance. This is based on sufficient early communication, getting to know each other well, and the tacit understanding that is slowly developed. That's why it's a good idea to talk about it.

3. I suggest you take some courses on intimate communication and read similar books. I recommend Chen Hai-xian's "Love Needs Learning" the most. It has real-life examples and teaches specific communication methods. It's also very easy to read. A marital relationship is a long-term game and long-term investment. You must learn to deal with it together in order to do better.

I hope this is helpful for you. Thanks!

Hello, question asker! I'm Du Ying, a listening coach, and I'm excited to help you.

From your description, I can see that you have a lot on your plate! When you come home tired from work, your lower back hurts so badly that you feel like you're going to die from the pain. Whenever you complain about this, your husband's response is always, "Something's wrong with my wife's mentality. If you're not happy, just quit. If you feel that way, there's nothing I can do about it. It makes me feel like I'm not being cared for." On top of that, our sex life is also not harmonious. You feel very depressed and exhausted, which is totally understandable!

You can feel how much you long for your husband to understand and care for you when you are physically and mentally exhausted from work, but his response makes you feel disappointed. Your married life is also very unharmonious, which makes you feel depressed and exhausted, as well as many other unspeakable emotions. But you can change this!

Let's dive in and explore why this is the case!

From what the questioner has said, it seems like they are going through a period of re-evaluation after falling in love and being infatuated. They are seeing some of the problems in each other after getting married, but they are also seeing the potential for growth and improvement! The questioner wants to get the attention of the other person through communication and hopes that the other person will meet their needs.

However, each of us enters marriage with childhood trauma and the interaction patterns of our original family. When the other party cannot satisfy our every wish, we have the opportunity to learn how to communicate our needs in a way that is respectful and understanding. The other party may feel controlled and confused at first, but with patience and communication, we can break the cycle and create a relationship that is fulfilling for both of us. In particular, the party who gives more will feel grateful for the opportunity to contribute to the relationship.

I'm excited to give the questioner a few suggestions that I think will be really helpful!

First, understand marriage. Marriage is a wonderful thing when you know how to manage it! There are certain rules that apply to all marriages, and I suggest that the questioner read "Intimacy" and "The Seven-Stage Journey to a Happy Relationship." These books talk about the different problems that exist at different stages of intimacy, and they're full of great advice on how to deal with them. I believe that after reading them, the questioner will understand the stage they are in, their own problems, and the problems of the other person, and they'll have lots of great ideas on how to solve them!

Second, learn to express yourself! I can see that the questioner describes feeling unwell both physically and mentally. After expressing this to her husband, he did not give a response that satisfied her, and she became even more dissatisfied. But there's no need to feel that way! When we express our feelings, we can choose to make the other person feel heard and understood, rather than accused. This can help to improve the relationship.

So, it's a great idea for the questioner to express their emotions and needs in a non-violent way. That means saying the facts, sharing their feelings and thoughts, and expressing their needs and hopes. For instance: "Mr., I'm feeling under the weather. I'd love for you to show me some extra care and warmth when I'm sick. I'd really appreciate it if you could comfort me more, care about me more, and take care of me more."

Third, learn to love yourself! It's important to remember that even if your partner loves you very much, they can't possibly meet your needs unconditionally. There are many reasons why this might not be possible, such as trauma in their childhood or the patterns they were taught by their family of origin. So, it's essential to lower your expectations of them.

When the other person cannot satisfy us, it's time to learn to love ourselves and take care of our body and mind! The good news is that the pain in the body and mind cannot be alleviated by the other person, even if they love us very much.

It's so important to learn how to take care of our physical and mental state! It's also a great idea to be able to see your own needs in the conflicts of marriage. Once you've expressed your needs, you can either learn to adjust, learn to be satisfied with yourself, or get satisfaction from friends and family. For example, when you have emotions, you can tell a straight man that he just doesn't understand. At this time, you can find a close friend to vent to, and your emotions will also be relieved, released, and understood!

I really hope these suggestions are helpful for the questioner! I also hope that the questioner can use their wisdom to handle the situation in their marriage and find the key to happiness.

Dear questioner, My name is Annie.

After reading your question, I can sense your fatigue and grievances. It seems that your husband's words may have hurt and disheartened you. It might be helpful to give the question asker, who needs to be understood, a hug.

The questioner said, "I just got married less than a year ago, and I feel like I don't get any care, and our married life is not harmonious." I wonder if this state of affairs existed before the marriage or if it's something that's developed recently.

Could I ask if anything has changed in your life recently? For example, have you started a new job or are you dealing with something important?

It is understandable that changes in life can lead to stress and conflict between husband and wife. However, if this has always been an issue in the relationship between the questioner and her husband, it might be helpful to consider the following:

Could you please tell me how you expressed your discomfort to your husband when you said, "When I'm tired from work, my lower back hurts so much that I feel like I'm dying from the pain"? I'm also curious about your tone of voice.

Have you had the opportunity to discuss with your husband how he can be of assistance? Have you had the chance to identify the most effective ways of communicating with him?

Could I ask whether you would like to solve a work problem or just need your husband's attention?

I'm not sure what the OP is thinking, but perhaps all you want is for your husband to show you care and be in tune with your feelings. That might make everything better. But for some reason, the way the OP expressed it seems like she's complaining to her husband. It's like someone was given a burden, and this person suddenly didn't know what to do with it for a moment, felt troubled, and then threw it back.

It would be helpful to include the following elements when expressing yourself to avoid any misunderstandings:

Perhaps it would be helpful to start by expressing what you really mean.

It is not uncommon for there to be a discrepancy between what people think and what they express.

For instance, when giving a speech, one might feel nervous but act as if they are calm. Similarly, someone who cares deeply might appear to be rambling, while someone who is scared might seem angry. And someone who wants love might appear to be blaming others.

Perhaps it's because we have an instinctive reaction to protect ourselves, and we get used to feeling safe by wrapping our vulnerability in armor.

It is understandable that when we feel pain, injustice, fear, or frustration, we may resort to a tough attitude and aggressive words as a way to protect our survival.

If the questioner would like her husband to care about her, she might consider saying something like this.

"I'm not feeling well, and I'm tired. I hope you can show me some love and care."

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider expressing your true feelings directly and calmly, and to try using "I need" and "I hope" instead of "you should" and "you must."

It is not necessary for communication to be overly emotional in order to see each other as we really are.

Secondly, it is important to communicate your needs in a clear and specific manner.

If communication is too general, the other person may not immediately understand our needs, which could lead to misunderstanding and a shift in the conversation.

If your husband is tired from work and experiencing discomfort in his lower back and with the acupuncture needles, you could try saying something like this:

"I'm not feeling well, and I wonder if you wouldn't mind giving me a back massage? I'm sure your kindness will do wonders for my wellbeing."

The "massage" in the last sentence is a concrete expression of what the other person can do for you. Additionally, you may wish to consider including the time, frequency, and parts of the body, if you feel that would be helpful. If we can make things clear during communication, it may increase the chances of achieving our goals.

Third, while you are trying to make your partner understand you, it would be helpful to also try to understand your partner's needs.

It would be advisable to choose the time for communication carefully, as this will affect the effectiveness of the communication.

For instance, if you communicate at an inopportune time, such as when everyone is rushing to work in the early morning, when you are exhausted after work and have not yet rested, when you are hungry, or when your partner is busy, etc., your partner may be willing to listen to you, but may find it challenging to concentrate and listen properly.

It would be beneficial for the questioner to consider her husband's current needs and find a mutually convenient time if she wants to communicate well with him. If you think of the other person first, they will learn to think of you.

It would be wonderful if the questioner could find a way that is comfortable for both of them as their marriage progresses.

I wish you the best and I'm here for you.

Hello! From the title, I can tell that you're longing to receive your partner's attention in this marriage. But when you talk to him about the unhappy and unpleasant things at work, his calm response makes you feel uncared for and unloved. And the lack of intimacy in your marriage makes you feel insecure, depressed, and exhausted. Let's hug! And let's analyze together what went wrong and how to grow from the problem.

♣ It's so important to understand the differences in emotional expression between men and women.

It's true that men and women have different ways of expressing their emotions. There are lots of reasons for this, including biology, social and cultural factors, and the family environment. Men are often seen as more rational, while women are often seen as more emotional.

So when you express your emotions to your partner, what you really want is for him to give you some care and comfort, not for him to provide solutions to your problems. However, your partner feels that you are telling him about specific problems, and according to his logical thinking, his response is to tell you how to solve your confusion.

So he may not love you in the way you need, but he does love you.

It's so important to teach your partner how to communicate with you and love you correctly.

When your partner can't seem to understand your inner needs, it can be really frustrating! But there's no need to get angry or complain. Instead, you can simply tell him what you're feeling and what you'd like him to do. After all, we never had a course in school that taught us how to communicate with others or how to love someone. So, in an intimate relationship, it's important not to take it personally when your partner doesn't understand you. Instead, you can simply teach him how to communicate with you and love you correctly.

♣ Take some time for yourself to improve your life and build a strong sense of security.

It's totally normal to feel this way when you can't feel the other person's care and your sex life isn't as harmonious as you'd like. It's natural to feel insecure in a marriage, and it's okay to feel depressed and tired when you don't know how to break it up.

It's so important to remember that your sense of security in a marriage doesn't come from the other person. It comes from within! We can only look outside for it when we're not giving ourselves enough love and security. So, instead of suppressing yourself, why not take action to improve yourself and build a moat of your own sense of security? You've got this!

It's so important to take care of yourself! Make sure you're communicating well, managing your career, taking care of your health, and making time for your hobbies. When you're happy and healthy, you'll be less likely to worry about a man.

When you're confident and attractive, you'll still be able to live a great life even if you leave the relationship.

♣ Don't be afraid to talk about sex!

We can all learn something new, and that goes for sexual techniques too! Let's put aside traditional conservative ideas and chat with our partners about how we feel during sex and how we can make each other's sexual experiences even better.

If you'd like to, you can even learn some new sexual techniques together to make your sex life even better!

I really hope these tips help you break through to a happier, more fulfilling married life.

Hello, my name is June, and I'm here to help!

It's been less than a year since you got married, and when you're tired or in pain, it can feel like your husband is an outsider. It's totally understandable to feel depressed and in pain when he seems helpless. Let's explore two questions together:

1. It looks like you're still in the courtship phase, while he's already in the marriage phase.

When men are in love, they often go above and beyond to win the favor of the other person. It's like the saying goes, "What's yours is yours, and what's mine is yours."

Men often hide their own needs and make everything revolve around the girl, which allows her to experience the wonderful feeling of being completely taken care of and needed. This often drives the girl to want to marry him.

We all loved being completely cared for and having the world revolve around us when we were babies. But as we grow up, we stop experiencing that kind of "every moment" care. So, there's a gap in everyone's heart, and we always hope to regain that feeling for the rest of our lives.

It's totally normal for girls to feel this way when they're in love. It's like how babies don't want to be weaned.

You say, "I really put him at the center of my life." I'd love to know how you did that!

Love him, attach to him, and cook for him? In other words, your world is only about him, just as a baby's world is only about its mother.

But, sweetheart, his world is no longer just you. He also has work, friends, parents, and games.

Many people say that men change when they get married, but the truth is, men don't change; they just become themselves again. So, you should also be yourself again! Your world also includes work, friends, shopping, beauty treatments, and so much more.

2. When you make a request to the other person, what kind of response do you hope you'll get?

It can be really frustrating when you're tired from work or have a painful injection, and he says there's nothing he can do about it. It can feel like he's not caring about your situation.

I'm just wondering, what do you think he should do?

1. We all feel pain in different ways, and there's no way anyone can describe it perfectly with words.

It's totally normal to feel anxious and aggrieved when you're in pain. It's only natural to want to vent your emotions to relieve the pain. If he doesn't have enough patience and sensitivity to respond to your emotions, it's only human to feel disappointed. It's only natural to feel like he doesn't understand you or love you enough.

This is totally normal, and everyone goes through this at some point.

Let's think rationally, my dear. The fact is, he can't feel your pain for you, and he's not a doctor, so he's really powerless.

2. If you're not sure what you really want, any response from him will be wrong.

He says, "If you don't feel good, you can quit." You get pretty upset when you hear this, don't you?

Your thoughts are: I just said that I work hard, I didn't say I was quitting, I just want you to care, why can't you say something warm?

If he says, "It's just work, it's not that easy, just bear with it and it'll pass," you might feel a little more frustrated.

What you think: I have worked so hard, and you are telling me to be patient? Oh, honey, you're my husband, aren't you?

When I married you, I surely hoped that I could lean on you when I'm tired, didn't I?

You see, any response from him is likely to make you unhappy. So if what you want is care, you might as well just tell him what you expect and need, my dear.

A teacher told you to watch "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" earlier, and I think it's a great idea! It's so important for men to understand that when a woman gets angry, it's not because she doesn't love them — it's just because she needs them to say something warm.

The above are the words of someone who has been married for 16 years and has experienced the seven-year itch of marriage. I really hope they'll inspire you!

Wishing you all the best!

Give the questioner a hug. Marriage and love are different.

When you're in love, you focus on the good. In marriage, you focus on the bad. That's why old people say you should keep your eyes open before marriage and one eye open and one eye closed after.

Ask yourself why you married him. What qualities attracted you to him?

To marry, you must feel at ease with your partner. Do you still feel that way? If not, analyze why.

Do you not understand him? Or is he just like that and you haven't recognized it?

If it hasn't changed, he doesn't care. Is it because he doesn't care or because he doesn't know how you feel? When there are problems, communicate and make your feelings clear.

Love and marriage are not the same. What was once special becomes ordinary. Marriage takes energy and dedication. Some people are tired from work and don't want to spend more energy on their family and partner. This can be fixed through communication and understanding.

Marriage is a process of adjustment. With patience and dedication, you can do a great job.

Your marriage isn't very harmonious. Look for the reason. Maybe it's because you're tired? Have you lost interest?

Or do you feel less attracted to each other? Try going on a romantic date, watching a movie, or going on an outing. This should improve things.

All work is for living. Live comfortably and you'll feel better. Come on!

Hi, I'm Strawberry.

I can see the author is feeling pretty down, so I give her a warm hug from afar. While the author is suffering from lumbar pain and the pain of the treatment process, her husband casually dismisses it as a problem of the author's mentality. They've only been married for less than a year, so why is the author's husband so cold?

The reason they got married was to care for and support each other, but from what the questioner said, it seems like she values the marriage more than her husband does. He seems pretty indifferent to her feelings. That makes her feel pretty sad.

The wrong way to communicate

When the questioner opened up to her husband, was it in person? What was the tone of her voice when she spoke to him?

What was the tone of his reply?

Communication can help build a relationship, but if we don't communicate well, it can make us feel uncomfortable because we feel like we haven't achieved what we wanted during the exchange.

Our bodies are our own, and sometimes when we describe our discomfort, other people just can't relate. At best, people with a strong sense of empathy will offer some comfort and understanding.

The questioner's husband, as an ordinary person, couldn't help her with her pain, so he gave her blunt advice: to quit her job. The questioner only wanted her husband's care when she confided in him, but she got such a response.

Could there be a misunderstanding?

I can't help it if you think that way. From this sentence, it seems like I can sense my husband's anger and sense of grievance. Is there really a misunderstanding?

When you're face-to-face, you can see how the other person is acting and what they're thinking right away. Words can get lost in translation because of how you're feeling at the time. So, whenever you can, try to communicate face-to-face.

I once watched a TV series in which the husband yelled at his wife quite a bit, but what he was really trying to say was that he cared for her. Although he knew that this was the wrong way to express himself, his wife knew that he cared for her because she understood him.

The questioner can think back and see if this is how her husband usually expresses himself, and whether she's tried to understand what he's saying by putting herself in his shoes.

Learn to manage intimacy together.

When we're not feeling well, our emotions can get all over the place. At this time, if we confide in someone, we just want to receive a comforting response from the other person, rather than being told what to do or given a lecture.

It seems that the husband didn't understand what the wife wanted at the time, which shows that he still needs to learn how to handle intimate relationships. We also need to learn not to measure our partners against our own expectations. It's not even been a year since they got married, and both the wife and husband are still learning how to get along with each other. They need to be more patient with each other during the adjustment process. Once they get past the adjustment period and find a way to get along with each other, their relationship will grow even warmer.

I'd also suggest reading "Perfect Love, Imperfect Relationships" and "It Turns Out That Understanding Is More Important Than Love." When it comes to love, it's important to recognize not just your partner's issues, but also your own. Only when we understand ourselves and others can we truly grasp that love requires mutual effort to build and maintain.

I hope my answer is helpful to the questioner. Best regards,

Hello, question asker!

Even though you didn't go into much detail, every word shows how unhappy you are in your marriage. We can really empathize with you and understand how you're feeling. Hugs!

Typically, if you've been married less than a year, you're still in the honeymoon phase. You also said at the beginning that you care about her a lot. I think you must have had a great time before you got married and were happy soon after the wedding. At that time, I imagine you were very gentle and lovely, and your husband should have done his best to make your relationship beautiful.

It's also worth noting that men are often more passionate than women, who tend to take longer to warm up. So, you may have fallen deeply in love with your husband's warm heart and had high expectations of him. This can lead to a situation where your hopes are higher than your reality, which is something we often say: the greater the hope, the greater the disappointment!

I don't know what you do for work, and I don't know what your husband does. You say that you work hard, and you say that your lower back hurts and that you get acupuncture. It's tough for people who haven't experienced it to empathize. Also, your illness is chronic. Is this not the first time you've told your husband?

I've probably mentioned this before, so please think about it. Was your husband's behavior acceptable the first time you said this?

We all know there's no second chance when it comes to men. They don't have much patience, do they? Is that why?

So, what should we do about the current situation? Let me share my views based on my personal experience!

First of all, I think we should adjust our expectations of marriage. We all know that when we are young girls, we are really super narcissistic, and when we are in love, we really think we are like princesses and princes. Anyway, that's how I felt. I always thought that after entering marriage, everything would be wonderful, and that we would never fight like our parents did. We always think that we will manage well, and this should be the dream that many young girls share. So, as women, we should all go through this stage. As the time of marriage grows, only if we adjust our expectations of the beauty of marriage during the process of getting used to each other, will it be possible to live comfortably in marriage!

Next, find a way to communicate with your husband that works for you both.

I've noticed that when you say you have back pain and get acupuncture, your husband's way of responding is always that there's something wrong with your mentality. Then he says, "If you're not happy, just quit." Honey, this kind of response really makes anyone feel bad when they hear it. Our bodies are already suffering enough, and when we see his attitude and hear his words, how can our hearts feel good? I'll give you another hug!

In psychology, there's a saying: who suffers? Who seeks help?

Who asks for help? Who changes?

As we've said many times, that's the only thing my husband says, so let's change the way we talk. For example, if you have back pain and it hurts to get an injection, you can say to your husband, "Please come with me to get the injection. I really can't stand it. I want to rely on your strength, just like you gave me that strength so-and-so time before." In other words, we may get better results by showing weakness. You should know that marriage needs to be nurtured, and there are now many resources in this area, so you can pay more attention to them.

Another thing to think about is the way you communicate with your husband. When your expectations aren't met, it's important to learn to love yourself.

Think about it this way: even though we're married and thought that the two of us would be happy, we're still two different individuals. The pain we feel is something we have to bear on our own. The other person can't act as we want them to. We're already suffering, so why torture ourselves like this and make ourselves feel bad because of the other person's actions? Think about it this way, too: your husband really can't help it. Your lower back pain needs acupuncture, and acupuncture hurts! You're tired from work, and he can't do it for you. What he says may not be a bad solution, and that is to quit your job!

If he says he wants to quit his job again, can you give him a piece of your mind? That's your hard-earned money, and you can let him earn it back through hard work. Of course, you need to be more careful about the way you communicate with him.

It's important to love yourself, and no matter what he says, you shouldn't get angry. Men and women are different, and they can be thick-headed and don't always understand our perspective.

Finally, insist on improving your abilities in every way! If you can truly love yourself and improve your abilities in every way, then why would we be begging for their attention with our eyes wide open? Oh, and I also want to say one thing here: you say you care a lot about your husband, but where do you show that care?

If you really care about your husband, then let's also carry forward the spirit of selflessness and love him! That is, love everything he does, and we will also find it cute when he tells us these things that we used to think were heartless. If you can do this, it will also improve our own abilities.

I think you can definitely change yourself through your own efforts. If you improve your abilities, I believe the discord in your marriage will naturally be resolved.

If you can gradually work through all the issues in your marriage, I think you'll find happiness again.

Give your marriage your all, and I'm here to support you!