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By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024
Hello, question asker! I'm Du Ying, a listening coach. I'm confident my answer will help you.
I give the questioner a warm hug from a distance. You say, "You are a pessimist who always thinks the worst. You worry about failing the high school entrance exam and see no better way out. You have suicidal thoughts. I can feel your helplessness and anxiety. In fact, the pressure of the high school entrance exam is really great, and many children have similar thoughts. I think it is also a very positive sign that you can seek help here, so I applaud you.
Let's cut to the chase and analyze why you have this kind of mentality.
First, the original family: The questioner said that he was originally a pessimistic person. This raises an important question: why did we develop a pessimistic personality? The answer lies in the environment in which you grew up. It is mainly related to the way your parents treat you and the concept of family education.
All of this can lead you to think in a pessimistic way. You cannot objectively and rationally face the problems and difficulties at hand if you have a negative mentality.
Second, puberty problems: The questioner has entered puberty at this age. The physiological characteristics of puberty are increased endocrine secretion and rapid and unstable brain development. Moreover, this period is characterized by a transitional stage towards personal independence. This means that previously repressed and unintegrated parts are exposed for integration. Therefore, during this period, children will have many negative thoughts and ideas that they cannot control, and their emotions will be unstable. Some will show signs of rebellion, depression, anxiety, etc. This kind of behavior on the part of the questioner is actually a manifestation of excessive anxiety. They are very worried that they will fail in the future, and they don't know what to do. They are afraid to face it, so they will have suicidal thoughts.
Third, studies: entering junior high school is completely different from elementary school. There are many difficult courses in junior high school, and teachers have high expectations. There is also the pressure of the entrance exam.
Therefore, it is inevitable that both families and schools will put pressure on students. Then, as we move from primary school to junior high school, if parents do not prepare us mentally and just keep demanding and putting pressure on us, we will undoubtedly be at a loss as to how to deal with it.
Based on the above analysis, the questioner should know that this problem has occurred. It is not unilateral, but caused by various aspects, and it is also a common phenomenon.
We shouldn't be overly anxious. What should we do instead? I have the following suggestions, which I am confident will be helpful.
First, communicate with your parents. You need to explain your situation to them honestly, while also letting them understand more about adolescence. This will help them be more understanding and tolerant of you. It will also help them realize the impact of your education methods and erroneous educational concepts on you. You can suggest that they go to a bookstore and read books on this topic.
If your parents agree, you should ask them to take you to see a psychologist and have the psychologist communicate with them.
Second, communicate with your teachers. Based on your academic performance, communicate with your teachers in each subject. Understand where the gap in your grades is in relation to getting into high school, and how you should work hard to achieve it. Set specific goals to improve your studies with the help of your teachers.
You can meet the conditions for entering high school with three years of hard work. If you find it difficult to communicate with your teachers, ask your parents to take you along to communicate with them.
Third, adjust your mentality. I remember a story about a bunch of grapes. The pessimist saw them and said, "Oh no, I'm eating one and there's one less, and less and less, it's so sad." The optimist said, "Wow, I still have so many left, they're so sweet, I'm so happy to eat them." The fact is, things are the same. It's our mentality that makes the difference. A different mentality leads to different results, and the process is felt differently.
The questioner must recognize their own pessimistic thoughts and make positive adjustments when encountering such situations. They must adopt a positive attitude to face problems and difficulties, learn to ask for help from parents, teachers, and classmates, and help themselves to find solutions. This will ensure peace of mind and prevent anxiety.
I am confident that my answers will help the questioner overcome the obstacles he is facing and achieve his goal of attending high school.
Helpful to me 546
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Comments
I can understand feeling overwhelmed by those thoughts. It's important to reach out to someone you trust, like a friend or family member, and share how you're feeling. They might offer support that could help.
Sometimes we need to remind ourselves that it's okay to feel this way, but it doesn't mean we have to act on these feelings. Seeking professional help from a counselor or therapist can provide tools to cope with these emotions more effectively.
When I feel down, I try to focus on small achievements and things that bring me joy. It might be helpful for you to find something that makes you happy, even if it's just for a moment.
Remember, failing an exam does not define your worth. There are many paths in life, and one setback doesn't close all doors. Maybe thinking about what you can learn from each experience can shift your perspective a bit.
It sounds really tough, but have you tried expressing your feelings through writing, art, or music? Sometimes creating something can be a release and also a way to understand our emotions better.