Lately, I've been experiencing some psychological issues, always afraid that my family might leave.

I want to give you a big hug and a thumbs up. At the tender age of 13, you have already sensitively and wisely realized the preciousness of time and the rarity of true feelings, which has led to some anxiety, sadness, and sadness.

I can sense that you may have experienced something that is difficult to talk about, if you feel comfortable sharing that with me.

If I may, I would like to share three thoughts with you.

Your sensitivity to time and panic at the thought of losing a family member shows your love for life. Life is a process that cannot be rehearsed or repeated, and we will all disappear one day.

This is why each day is so precious and wonderful for us all, and it makes us appreciate the people and things in our lives even more.

Secondly, it is possible that excessive worry may have an impact on your study life and mood. Conversely, maintaining an appropriate level of anxiety could be beneficial to your growth and progress.

You are only 13 years old now, and it would be beneficial to focus on your studies and enjoying a happy life. While studying is challenging, it is an essential process.

It might be helpful to consider that your loved ones would be happy to see you thriving in a healthy and happy way, and making progress in your learning. It's possible that your anxiety is affecting your ability to live normally. You might find it helpful to make new friends, try new sports, listen to more pop music, and read more. These activities could help distract you and improve your quality of life.

Third, if there is something from the past that has caused you distress and left a lasting impression, you might consider writing it down or speaking with a trusted teacher or friend. In your sharing, it seems that you did not mention your mother. I believe there may be reasons and concerns that you are holding back, which we can respect and address. Waiting until the right time to open up and let it go may be the best choice.

In short, you are a well-behaved, sensible, kind, and grateful child. If you can adjust yourself appropriately and boost your self-confidence, you will undoubtedly have an even better life, and you and your family will undoubtedly be happier.

I hope this message finds you well. I am a young man who is eager to connect with you on a personal public account (ID: qingnianJIA2020).

Yixinli We kindly invite you to visit the following links for more information: Answering Questions Hall Mutual Aid Community, the World and I Love You >> https://m.xinli001.com/qa

Good morning, I hope this message finds you well. I would like to extend a warm greeting to the 13-year-old facing the most significant separation anxiety in their life.

First, let us review the situation based on your description.

1. The significant age difference between you and your family members. You are a 13-year-old child, your father is 55 years old, and your grandfather is over 80 years old. From this perspective, your father is a late bloomer.

The significant age difference has prompted some concern.

2. The anxiety you feel about ultimate separation. Despite their good health, the age difference causes you to anticipate that your family will eventually separate, resulting in the loss of past experiences.

As a result, you are particularly sensitive and anxious about the passage of time, and you find that each day seems to pass more quickly than the last.

3. How to address the facts and inner panic in a more constructive manner. Based on the facts and inner thoughts, it is causing you to feel negatively about the situation, which is affecting your studies.

Therefore, you are seeking guidance on how to effectively navigate these challenges and thrive in the face of adversity.

Secondly, we will examine the issue you have raised.

1. Insufficient sense of security during the growth period. In the current social climate, there is a growing trend towards marrying and having children later in life. This is reflected in the fact that there are numerous individuals of a similar age who have a significant age difference with their parents and grandparents.

Such families typically enjoy a relatively comfortable material lifestyle, with parents who are mentally mature and have accumulated a certain amount of wealth in their careers. Consequently, when the children are born, they are afforded the best of everything and have a very good environment in which to grow up.

When children are protected and grow up carefree, they may exhibit a more childlike spirit than others. However, as they age, their parents often appear to be aging, creating a noticeable gap between them.

At this time, children may experience a sense of psychological conflict and crisis. On the one hand, they may feel that they are still young and require the support of their parents. On the other hand, they may be concerned about their parents' aging process and the need to provide support as soon as possible. This can be described as an "insufficient sense of security during growth" or a "sudden feeling of being forced to grow up."

This is a psychological phenomenon resulting from an inherent truth, and I believe that individuals of a similar age will likely experience a similar response.

2. The fear of the "ultimate separation" is a common problem among humans. Your ability to ask this question demonstrates a level of maturity that is commendable. The topic you are concerned about is also a challenge that many philosophers and religious scholars have been grappling with for centuries.

The renowned contemporary psychologist Irwin Yalom identifies four fundamental existential concerns: inevitable death, profound loneliness, the need for freedom, and the absence of a clear purpose in life. Many individuals strive to comprehend the inevitability of death in order to find an explanation that resonates with their personal beliefs.

It is not detrimental to your development that you are experiencing distress at this early stage of your life. There are external and internal factors at play.

3. Understand and face the "ultimate separation." It is a source of concern because it is not fully understood, because it will result in a shift from "we" to "I," because it is not a choice, and because it may result in a permanent loss.

As a given, what can we do? Is it to fear it, to want to escape it needlessly, to pretend not to see it, or to face it while making the most of the present moment? I believe that through learning, we can make wise choices.

We can also broaden our understanding of life to mitigate this fear. From a holistic perspective, the Taoist view of life posits that life is a unified entity, shaped by the fundamental principles of the Tao. Birth and death are also part of this natural cycle. There is no reason to be afraid. From a generational standpoint, the Confucian perspective views life as a continuous stream, flowing from one generation to the next. As long as our legacy lives on in the hearts of future generations, we continue to exist.

4. Based on the aforementioned points, what actions and mindset should be adopted to address this issue? Primarily, there is a need for self-improvement.

The most effective way to address the unavoidable is to take the initiative. Your parents and grandparents are advancing in age, and you are currently 13 years old, a transitional age. Regardless of your family's current financial status, it is essential to pursue academic excellence and maintain a regular exercise regimen. You should actively engage in learning, both at home and beyond, acquiring knowledge about the world around you.

First, your family is still young and able to provide you with the necessary learning conditions. Second, as you become stronger, you will become less dependent on your parents and feel more secure. Third, your parents and grandparents will feel less worried and more relieved when they see your abilities growing day by day. Second, capitalize on the present.

The most effective way to control the unpredictable future is to seize the present moment, as it is in the present that the eternity of life is born. Many people desire to live forever, yet they lack the knowledge to truly value life. While it is not possible to extend each day to 25 hours, there are ways to make full use of the 24 hours we have.

Do not dwell on past experiences or fantasize about future scenarios. Instead, concentrate on the tasks that are currently relevant. In addition to your studies, it is beneficial to spend more time with your parents and family members, and to interact with them in a genuine and sincere manner.

Seizing the moment can provide an unexpected sense of strength. Third, treat and help others sincerely.

All relationships are subject to change. Family relationships are also formed between two people who originally did not know each other—parents and children. Therefore, while some relationships will naturally evolve and change over time, new relationships will also emerge.

Now that you have established your own circle of friends, you will eventually form your own family and establish new relationships. From this perspective, it can be said that others (us) are also part of our (others') happy lives.

I am a repository of knowledge and a fountain of ideas. I believe that you can start from a small seedling that is carefully nurtured, bravely accept the various challenges that nature and society have to offer, and before you know it, you will have become a tree with lush branches and leaves that can provide shelter from the wind and rain for others!

Hello, landlord. I'm Auntie Xiang'er.

From what you've written, I can tell you love and care for your family. I understand your fear and anxiety about being separated from them. This is hard to bear. I wonder what you've experienced that has caused such a young person to carry such a heavy burden.

Your dad is 55, your grandparents are over 80. You feel they could leave at any time. If they do, you'll never see new people again. You'll no longer be loved by your family. You'll no longer hear them nag. You'll no longer receive any of their text messages or WeChat messages. You'll no longer hear from them at all. Thinking about this makes you sad. It even affects your life and studies. You have developed meta-anxiety. You're also anxious about your studies being affected by anxiety. You're doing the right thing by actively seeking a solution. Auntie Xiang Er appreciates you for having such self-awareness and perception.

Your grandparents are over 80 but still healthy. This is a blessing. When they die is unknown. No one knows when they will leave. Maybe soon, but they could live another 10-20 years. Dad is 55, middle-aged. Are you afraid he will leave because of recent events?

Do you learn about death from TV or the internet? Are you worried about your family leaving because of what you see?

You didn't mention your mother. Are you worried about her too? We also have to think about ways to overcome fear and anxiety.

Auntie Xiang Er has some tips.

I understand you want to be with your loved ones forever, but you don't know when they'll leave this world. It could be soon or it could be a long time from now. Why believe it will happen tomorrow and make yourself fearful?

Death is part of life. Everyone dies.

Birth, aging, sickness, and death are natural laws. They affect everyone, no matter who they are or how much money they have.

③ Control what you can. You feel helpless and think you can't do anything.

You can't control life and death, especially not at 13. Why not just accept it?

We can't control when our loved ones leave us, but we can control how we spend time with them. Seize the opportunity!

When you're feeling down, try painting or keeping a diary. Negative emotions build up in the brain and enter the subconscious.

The subconscious mind is hard to detect and affects our health. If we write it down, it becomes conscious and can be removed from the body. This is emotional release.

When you think of something bad, focus on something else.

When you feel fear and anxiety, try this: Play some classical music, find a comfortable place and a comfortable position. Sit up straight with your feet flat on the ground.

Breathe in through your nose, then hold for a few seconds. Breathe out through your mouth. Repeat a few times.

Our brain waves are most relaxed during alpha waves, so breathing deeply expels turbid air from the body.

Death is not the end of a relationship. It is forgetting. Even if a loved one really has to leave, you will stay connected.

They're still there, in your heart. So enjoy the moment and make the best memories you can.

Auntie Ying believes you can.

Hello! I'm sending you a warm hug from afar.

I am pleased to see that you have sought help, and I am confident that my input will provide you with the support and assistance you need.

You are worried that your family will suddenly leave you. This indicates that you long for your family to spend more time with you and are particularly afraid of them leaving you.

I believe this sudden fear, unease, and worry of yours is related to the books, movies, or TV dramas you've been watching recently. The fates of the characters in these stories have triggered your thoughts on life and given rise to a strong sense of abandonment and unloved loneliness if the people close to you were to leave. It's also likely that your recent interpersonal relationships at school have played a role. The loneliness of being ignored, isolated, and rejected in a group can also lead to a fear of abandonment and death.

You need to be aware of this.

The opposite of death is a better life. When you realize that death is a life issue that everyone must face, your fear of death will dissipate. Instead, you will confront your emotional feelings about death, become more aware of your emotions, and identify the hidden needs behind them, such as the desire to be loved, accompanied, supported, accepted, understood, and encouraged.

You will be guided by your own needs to cherish your time with your family more, support each other, and appreciate the beauty of being together.

I am Lily, the little ear of the Q&A Museum. The world and I love you.

Hello, child.

At first, you wrote, "Please read this patiently," and I felt a rush.

You feel you need care but it doesn't seem to be there. You're afraid of being ignored or blamed.

It's a cry from the bottom of your heart: "Please read me patiently. I hope someone wants to see me and read me."

They are good books. I want to be colorful and lovable.

You're young and already worried about your dad and grandparents leaving you.

What made you think of these things?

If you need support, I remember Tang and Song poems from school.

"Waterfalls 3,000 feet straight down, I wonder if it's the Milky Way falling from the sky."

"This feeling can be remembered, but at the time it was confusing."

You have your own experiences and life. What you read at different ages will also be different. Try to connect with poets. There must be people who will listen to you and give you comfort.

Thinking about family matters affects the learning process. Since this has already happened, self-blame will consume your energy.

If you want to keep up, talk to your teachers and classmates. Then you can find the best way for you.

Be selective about taking on board other people's advice. You can also do so with curiosity.

You worry about your grades because of your environment. You think good grades mean everything is okay.

But happy learning is more valuable. Confucius said, "Even if he only has a bamboo container and a wooden dipper, Zi Hui is happy."

"Xun zai, Hui ye."

Playing games with kids in gym can help relieve stress.

Please read it patiently. I am 13 years old. My grandparents and father are all very healthy. Recently, I have been thinking a lot about when my family will leave me. And if I remember something, I can't help crying at night. After all, my father is 55, and my grandparents are over 80. I'm really excited to see what the future holds for me. And these past three days, I've been thinking a lot. Yesterday, I was thinking that today would be fine, and today I was thinking that tomorrow would be fine. No, it's always on my mind. These past few days, I was supposed to have an exam at school, but when I think about this, I'm going to be late for studying, and it's also making me think about what I want to do with my life. Now that I think about it, time has passed very quickly, and now I'm especially aware of how quickly time flies. Sigh, I hope someone can enlighten me a little, so that I don't feel so sad. Really, that's all.

Hello! I just wanted to give you a big hug!

My child, I have a child the same age as you. And guess what? He has also raised the same questions you have!

So, it's totally normal for you to have such thoughts!

My child, your father's age is the reason you have these thoughts. The children of your age have young mothers and fathers, but your father is so old.

You're going to have some thoughts about your family members leaving you one day, and that's okay! It's all part of growing up and learning about the world around you.

At the same time, it also shows that you currently lack a sense of security. But don't worry! This is something you can work on.

I'm here for you! If you have any ideas or questions in the future, just leave me a message. I'll answer you as soon as I open the app and see it.

My child, you are only 13 years old, so you have so much time to focus your energy on your studies first. Once you are knowledgeable, you will be able to help your family in so many ways!

Birth, aging, illness, and death are natural phenomena. They're all part of life! And death is no cause for fear. It's a normal part of life. So, don't worry about it! Instead, focus on studying hard, learning new things, and getting stronger with every book you read.

And our attitude towards life is to live in the present! Children, let's remember that today is the only day we need to focus on and make the most of.

Go for it! Do what you should do today. Study when you should study, eat when you should eat, sleep when you should sleep.

Tomorrow is a brand new day!

Go for it! Remember what your uncle said and live today to the fullest.

I am Chu Mingdeng, and I love you all!