Mental state affects normal life. After self-awareness, how should one respond?

Hello,

First of all, I'd like to congratulate the poster on being so self-aware. It's great that you're able to identify where the problem lies and what has caused it.

This is already better than what many people do. Many people often lose control of their lives, but they can't find the problem or the cause.

Knowing where the problem lies is the first step towards solving it. I hope the questioner can relax and not feel bad about being unable to cope with this. You've noticed the problem and that your life has been affected, so you're already on the way to dealing with it.

Second, even though it's unclear what impact your "major event" has had on you, it's a good idea to consider it in a way that feels safe for you and express your emotions.

For instance, things like fear, anxiety, and sadness.

If you need a safe space to process this, you can be accompanied by a trusted colleague or just be alone.

Write down all your emotions on a piece of paper. This should include what you're thinking, what you're worrying about, what you're considering, and what you're torn between.

If writing isn't your thing, just speak your thoughts aloud. If that doesn't work, you can always record them with a voice recorder.

Or, just have a good cry and then work out how you're going to deal with your emotions.

If you don't mind, I'd like to quote a book here.

To eliminate internal conflicts, reduce or avoid anxiety, and maintain the integrity and unity of the personality, the self has many ways to deal with unwanted thoughts and desires, which are collectively referred to as "defense mechanisms."

The defense mechanisms are as follows:

There are eight types of repression: repression, sublimation, substitution, denial, reverse effect, rationalization, projection, and rationalization.

To put it another way, if something in your life makes you feel uncomfortable and affects your day-to-day, it will trigger your defense mechanism.

That means you'll always respond to it in these ways.

It's worth noting that these eight methods have both positive and negative effects.

Let's use an example to explain these eight ways to the original poster.

1. Repression: It's a positive effort by the self to exclude something threatening from consciousness or to keep it from approaching consciousness. It basically takes the form of forgetting.

For example, one night a young boy saw his father beat his mother. When asked about it later, the boy said he'd never seen anything like it.

2. Sublimation: The ego turns dangerous unconscious urges into socially acceptable actions. It's a solid defense mechanism.

For instance, aggressive id impulses can be redirected into activities like ice hockey or rugby.

3. Substitution: redirecting impulses towards something or someone that isn't threatening. For example, taking out anger at work on family members.

4. Denial: Refusing to acknowledge or accept certain facts.

For example, a husband who deeply loves his wife may still behave as if she were alive long after her death. He might leave a seat at the dinner table for her or tell his friends that she has gone to visit relatives.

5. Reverse action: Acting in a way that goes against your unconscious desires to avoid frightening thoughts or desires. For example, a woman might tell others how much she loves her mother, even though she actually hates her mother deep down.

6. Rationalization: Using logic instead of emotion to think about something can help you deal with difficult ideas without feeling anxious. For example, if a woman is pretending to think about why it's important to wear a seat belt, she might be imagining her husband in a terrible car accident.

7. Projection: This is when you attribute an unconscious impulse to someone else rather than to yourself. For example, a woman who thinks that all her neighbors are leading immoral private lives may have sexual desires for the married man next door.

8. Rationalization: replacing the real reason for your actions with a reason that you can accept and that your conscience can forgive. For example, sour grapes, sweet lemons, etc.

These defense mechanisms are called "defense mechanisms," and people always face them this way, although, in reality, we definitely prefer "sublimation."

My view is that as long as the original poster feels better, can recover, and can cope with the consequences,

Just choose one of the above eight.

The original poster doesn't need to worry. You might not be able to cope, but you can believe that you are coping.

It's also worth noting that not responding is a form of coping.

If you don't have the strength to deal with everything, any reason not to deal with it is the best way to deal with it.

That's the best way to handle it in the moment.

If you feel like you've got your emotions under control and you're ready to take action, then go for it.

If there's still something you haven't been able to do, then take some time for yourself. Give yourself the appropriate amount of time and space, and a break.

If you're not ready to do something and you push yourself to do it anyway, it'll only make things worse and you'll only hurt yourself.

But when you can do something as simple as asking someone a question,

That's something you can do to gradually improve your situation.

All you have to do is a little.

If you can't, you can take a little break.

Life isn't perfect. It always has its share of difficulties and regrets.

But life is also beautiful because it's always there, waiting for you to discover it. No matter how tough it is or how embarrassing, it'll always pass, it'll always get better, and you can always turn the page and start a new chapter.

I hope this is helpful for you to refer to.

Dear friend, I can see that you are facing a difficult time, but I am here to help! Let's discuss it together and find a way through it!

1. You have experienced a relatively major setback, and your psychological state has been affected to a certain extent, affecting your normal life. The fact that you can still be self-aware shows that you are great. You deserve a big thumbs-up! Sometimes when people are hit by a setback, they cannot rationally assess themselves, but you can, which shows that you are mentally strong.

2. When facing problems, sometimes people are in the middle of the problem and will not think of a solution. This is the meaning of the saying "the person involved is confused, the outsider sees clearly." But don't worry! At this time, you might as well relax your mind and try to find things you like to do. After a while, you can come back to the problem that has hit you hard, and you'll be ready to tackle it!

3. If you still can't figure it out, don't worry! You can always borrow the strength of friends, books, and teachers. Talk to these people and look for answers in books. You never know, someone else's experience might help you overcome this difficult situation!

4. You are an expert on your own problems! You know your situation better than anyone and understand your own resources better than anyone else. Take a deep breath and think about it at this time. You may make new discoveries!

I'm so glad you found this helpful! Thanks for reading!

I hope my response proves to be of some assistance.

It is not uncommon to experience a certain degree of psychological impact following the occurrence of a significant event. It is unclear how one might "deal with" such an experience after realizing that one is unable to cope with it following self-awareness. Suppressing emotions and pretending that one is fine is an ineffective method of coping.

Following the experience of a significant event, it is crucial to prioritize two key strategies: self-relieving and seeking assistance.

Self-relieving.

Despite our relatively small and vulnerable stature in the context of the natural world, we humans possess considerable resilience and the capacity to repair ourselves. In the face of significant psychological distress, the overwhelming majority of individuals will emerge from the experience with minimal long-term adverse effects.

In response to adversity, individuals employ a range of self-relieving strategies to mitigate the impact of setbacks. These strategies can be broadly classified into three categories: problem-solving, letting go, and adjustment.

The source of stress must be identified and addressed. In the context of the current pandemic, this may entail taking proactive measures to prevent and control infection, ensuring adequate intake of fruits and vegetables to bolster immunity, and reducing anxiety through rigorous study and effective coping strategies. Similarly, in the face of an impending examination, it may be beneficial to prioritize rigorous study and effective coping strategies.

The greater the number of resources available to an individual, the more effective they will be in coping with stressors. It is therefore essential to identify the resources at one's disposal and to ascertain how they can be utilised to facilitate resilience in the face of challenging circumstances.

However, it is important to note that not all challenges in life can be readily solved. This includes, but is not limited to, circumstances such as birth, aging, illness, death, separation, and natural and man-made disasters. In such cases, it is essential to employ the remaining two methods to effectively address these issues.

The act of letting go involves the lowering of expectations regarding individuals and events, as well as the avoidance of situations and interactions that elicit intense emotional responses.

For example, when individuals experience losses such as the loss of love, loved ones, property and status, or health, it can be challenging to adapt to these changes. In such instances, it is crucial to accept the situation and transition to a new lifestyle to accommodate the new circumstances. Attempting to maintain the same coping mechanisms used in the past to address life transitions may lead to an inability to adapt and a continued attachment to past patterns of thinking and behaving.

Such individuals may become enmeshed in a multitude of complex and potentially detrimental relationships, which can have a profound and long-lasting impact on their personal growth and development. These "love-hate" dynamics, which are often challenging to disengage from, can ultimately impede personal progress and lead to emotional distress.

Adjustment refers to the process of modifying one's emotional state through the application of psychological coping strategies. It is important to note that suppressing emotions is not a viable long-term solution; rather, it is essential to find ways to release and transform these feelings.

The act of confiding in another individual, expressing one's emotions through venting, engaging in activities that provide distraction, or even sublimating one's feelings through activities such as writing or studying, can all serve as effective methods for relieving psychological pressure. These techniques can be selected according to one's personal preferences. It is crucial to understand that rather than allowing oneself to become overwhelmed by emotions and stress, it is more beneficial to engage in activities that are beneficial for both the body and mind. By continuing to learn throughout one's lifetime, individuals can undoubtedly enhance their ability to cope with stressful situations.

2. It is advisable to seek assistance.

In the event that self-relieving is unable to mitigate the stress response, it is imperative to seek external assistance. This represents a crucial step in facilitating one's own recovery.

Those who can provide assistance can be divided into two categories: one's own effective social support system and professionals.

It is advisable to seek the assistance of an effective social support system. It is a well-established fact that humans require the backing of their community. When one feels helpless and isolated, it is crucial to seek help from relatives or friends who can provide resources and emotional support.

It is beneficial to be able to seek assistance from this source and obtain the necessary resources and support. If there are individuals in one's immediate circle who can comprehend and offer assistance, it is advisable to do so. It is also important to recognize that these individuals may have a genuine desire to provide help, which reflects their value as a person.

It is advisable to seek the assistance of a qualified professional. A counselor can provide a secure environment in which to release pent-up emotions. The counselor will assist in the release of emotions, adjustment of perceptions, rebuilding of hope in life, alleviation of current pain, stabilization of emotions, and restoration of self-adaptive functions.

It is my hope that the aforementioned information will prove to be of some assistance. Sincerely,