Moods can suddenly collapse, with a feeling of not wanting to live, and then suddenly become clear again. What is the problem?

Between life and death, death is easy. If you are alive, you will have responsibilities, love, and obligations, but you will also have a sense of accomplishment, belonging, happiness, and joy.

When I was young, I looked for help when I was in trouble. But I realized that I could help myself and others.

I don't know why there is a sun in the sky, but I know there is a sun in the sky. I can also be another sun, lighting up people's hearts and melting ice in their hearts. With this belief, I have achieved this after a few years.

Many of my friends will tell me about their troubles. I encourage them to gain strength.

I always tell my friends: "Believe in yourself. You can do anything. Don't give up."

"The thing that makes me happiest is when people tell me that whenever they encounter setbacks, they read my letters and feel stronger. They find solutions to their problems and gain new abilities. They try to help others, and gradually become more confident. It can be said that everyone around me is influenced by me.

Everyone can be influenced and can influence others. It's just a matter of willpower. The stronger willpower wins.

I learned to be strong. This has had a big impact on my life. Everyone can benefit from this.

Hello, question asker. I am Du Ying, a listening coach, and I am confident my answer will help you.

From your description, I can tell that after junior high school, you live on campus by yourself, facing various problems of puberty, including interpersonal relationships. You have many internal conflicts, and you long for the care and love of your loved ones, but you don't feel it yourself. You become indifferent, but you are not satisfied. You often feel useless and have suicidal thoughts. I give you a warm hug from afar and say to you, "My child, the problems you mentioned are encountered by many students. I can tell that you are already trying hard to find a way to improve, and you are actively seeking help.

Let's identify the root cause and explore more effective solutions.

Let's start by understanding what puberty is. After age 12, children enter puberty, with increased endocrine secretion and rapid brain development. The significant changes in the body make children in puberty emotionally unstable and prone to anger and impulsivity. Personality development also transitions from attachment to independence.

During this stage, some of the so-called rebellious behaviors of adults are actually a reintegration of the repressed parts before the age of 12. This is a crucial process in preparing for independence of character. It is also a process of beginning to explore and establish life views, world views, and values. This may involve thinking about philosophical questions such as why we are alive, where we came from, and where we are going. They do not agree with some of the previous concepts of their parents. They have their own ideas and are eager to prove that they are right.

They crave their parents' approval, understanding, and respect. They dislike the way their parents and teachers lecture them.

However, they know they should be true to themselves, but they're afraid to express themselves or afraid of damaging their relationships with their loved ones and teachers. So they suppress their feelings and thoughts. But if they don't do this, they will feel very uncomfortable, and they'll have a lot of internal conflicts and repression, as well as a lot of doubts.

After reading the above description of puberty, the questioner knows how he feels about it. He can think about what his situation is like. Is it just him?

You must face this stage. The following suggestions will be helpful to you.

First, recognize your true self. You said, "Studying away from home by myself, I was particularly socially anxious in junior high school. I didn't like to interact with strangers, like hailing a taxi, and I also resented the concern of my relatives and my mother-in-law, feeling that it was false and a burden." It's clear from this text that you're particularly afraid of interpersonal interactions. I'm curious: how did you get along with your parents when you were young?

I want to know how this social phobia developed. Did they not feel true happiness and love in their interpersonal communication from childhood to adulthood?

If you feel pain or unhappiness when interacting with your loved ones, you may choose to protect yourself by remaining silent and not expressing your feelings and thoughts. This is a natural response, but it is not the best way to handle things. The way we are now is gradually formed by our past experiences, how others treat us, and how we perceive them.

The questioner should recall and think about what they have experienced since childhood. This will help them understand why they have become socially fearful and indifferent to the concerns of their loved ones.

Second, express emotions and thoughts positively. You said, "I can feel that they really started to care about me, but I don't care anymore. I can't return the care they give me." You also said, "I don't feel sad or upset when they get sick or even die, but I wonder what kind of response is correct and polite." Because of this, you often think of the people who have always cared about you. However, you can't return their kindness to you, so you feel very depressed. You also feel sorry for them.

From this text, it is clear that you are already able to feel their care for you, but you are unable to feel the emotion of sadness. It is evident that you have suppressed the emotion of sadness.

I want to know how the questioner hid his sad emotions from childhood to adulthood. After experiencing something that made him very sad and upset, he hid it to never experience that sadness again.

You can't even feel sad when a loved one dies. You know this is wrong, and you blame yourself a little.

The questioner must find out why they have become what they are. They must also actively express their thoughts and feelings to those around them. This will ensure that they do not hide their emotions or become indifferent.

You can express yourself in a way that is non-violent, which will not damage the relationship, but will also allow others to feel their feelings, thoughts and needs, be true to themselves and improve their relationships. The formula for non-violent communication is: facts (without evaluation) + my feelings and thoughts + my needs and suggestions and hopes.

For example, you came to visit me. I know you care about me, and I expect you to visit me every week. Or what just happened made me feel sad. I hope it won't happen again. You should have communicated with me in advance and considered my feelings.

Third, maintain a positive attitude and find the meaning of life. You said, "I often feel that it is useless to be alive and that no one needs me." This is an extreme idea, but it's important to understand that you're not alone in feeling this way. Many people feel this way when they're under stress. It's natural to feel this way when you're facing challenges. However, it's not helpful to dwell on these feelings. You have to take control of your emotions. You have to take the college entrance exam. Once you take that exam, you'll feel better. You'll feel in control of your life again. You'll feel like you're going to live. This text shows that you're in a state of mind where you feel like you're going to die. You're struggling to control your emotions. You're looking for a way to make your life more positive and meaningful.

Life itself has no meaning. The process of searching for the meaning of life and giving it meaning is the most meaningful thing. The questioner should read the books "Living a Meaningful Life" and "Feeling Love" to learn to feel love and to find the meaning of life.

Nietzsche was right: "A man who knows why he lives can bear any life." Your question is meaningful. It solves your problem and inspires others.

The questioner will undoubtedly gain further experience and feel the meaning of their own life and find the direction of their life.

I am confident that the above suggestions will be helpful to the questioner. I am certain that the questioner will see the problems encountered now as opportunities for growth. I am sure that the questioner will be proactive and brave in facing them, and will soon find a way out of their spiritual dilemma and become the best version of themselves.

Good day, question asker.

From your description, it appears that you are in a state of despair, akin to being in a black hole. However, upon your arrival, it seemed as though you were surrounded by small holes in the black hole, which provided you with a sense of support and helped you maintain your resolve.

From your description, it is evident that you are experiencing a significant degree of depression, self-blame, and internal conflict. However, it is also apparent that you have undergone a transformation, initially exhibiting social phobia but gradually becoming less concerned about certain matters. While this lack of concern may evoke an uncomfortable sensation, it represents a form of change.

It is important to note that each individual is unique, and no two people experience the world in exactly the same way. Our emotional responses to the same situations vary considerably from person to person. There is no obligation for us to feel the same way about things.

From your description, I am curious to know what sources of strength support you in such an uncomfortable situation. What enables you to become aware and to express your uncomfortable feelings through this platform?

I am aware that you are experiencing distress, trapped in your emotions and unable to extricate yourself. However, when you choose to engage in discourse on this platform or cling to a glimmer of hope, that is when change begins.

You have previously described how you felt uncomfortable when you were studying away from home in junior high school. Could you please provide a detailed account of what occurred at that time?

Despite your awareness that others care about you, you may occasionally experience a lack of emotional connection, leading to feelings of depression and discomfort, and even a sense of guilt. Is this an accurate description?

In regard to the meaning of life as you have described it, I also experience a sense of meaninglessness and worthlessness when I am in a state of physical discomfort. This is related to the fact that I did not receive sufficient emotional support from my biological family. What are your thoughts on this matter? You may wish to consider this issue in greater depth.

The notion that life itself is devoid of intrinsic meaning is a fallacy; rather, it is our capacity to prepare for and respond to life's challenges that ultimately determines the quality of our existence. To illustrate this point, consider the cinematic experience of "The Shawshank Redemption," which offers a poignant exploration of hope and redemption.

It is not possible to provide advice that is entirely tailored to your specific situation. However, the following tips may prove helpful in a general sense.

It is recommended that you initially seek the assistance of a professional counselor.

Upon accessing this platform, it is likely that you have conducted a substantial amount of online research. It is not uncommon for individuals to require assistance from external sources, particularly professional counselors, who utilize specialized psychological techniques to assist in understanding the underlying causes of distress. These professionals create a secure and welcoming environment, where individuals can flourish and evolve with resilience.

Secondly, it is important to learn to embrace oneself.

In your description, you have accurately identified the areas you believe to be lacking, which demonstrates your ability to think critically and summarize effectively. However, you have overlooked your strengths. This has led to a prolonged emotional state and an inability to move forward. Therefore, I recommend that you, the next time this situation arises, learn to embrace yourself, to put your arms around yourself, to allow yourself to have this situation, and to confront this feeling of not being accepted. You should say, "I see that you will allow your existence, you cannot affect me, and I will slowly become stronger." This approach may help to promote greater emotional stability.

Furthermore, it is imperative to learn to release negative emotions.

The self-perception formed during one's formative years, whether in junior high school or beyond, can influence one's emotional state. These emotions, if suppressed for an extended period, can impede one's ability to relax and envision a more positive version of oneself. To overcome this, it is essential to learn to release these emotions, which may include feelings of loneliness, discomfort, suppression, fear, and despair. Various techniques can be employed to achieve this, such as meditation, deep breathing, talking to a trusted individual, keeping a journal, or even exercising. It is noteworthy that exercise can serve as a form of self-healing.

During exercise, the brain secretes dopamine, which provides a sense of pleasure. Therefore, exercise can be considered a method of both stress reduction and self-healing, as evidenced by experimental findings.

Ultimately, it is essential to have self-belief and to persevere.

Life presents a multitude of challenges, and each individual must confront their own unique difficulties. When confronted with adversity and find themselves unable to move forward, it often indicates a lack of internal fortitude. A common pitfall is the inability to believe in one's capacity for change and growth. This mindset often leads to a sense of stagnation and prevents individuals from taking the necessary steps to improve. It is crucial to challenge this mindset and instill a sense of self-belief. Having a strong conviction that one can and will improve, even in the face of significant obstacles, is essential for fostering personal growth and resilience. This belief is a powerful driving force that can propel individuals towards positive change and facilitate their journey towards betterment.

In this account, I will delineate my personal experience with low self-esteem and a lack of security. I have been afflicted with social phobia for over eight years. Despite these challenges, I have developed a sense of inner strength. I am convinced that with perseverance, I will identify an effective approach that aligns with my needs. This is the reason I have pursued studies in psychology. While I have not yet attained the qualifications of a qualified psychological counselor, I have consistently engaged in learning and attended courses. I have achieved the ability to engage in social activities such as dining out and shopping independently. Additionally, I have learned to assert myself in the face of neglect and accusations from others.

It is my hope that this message will resonate with you: if we maintain our belief, we can overcome the obstacles that impede our progress and usher in a new era of enlightenment.

Hello, host! I'm smiling!

After reading your description, I have a better understanding of the question you want to ask, and I'm excited to answer it! In this regard, I also give you a hug in the four-dimensional space.

From the problems you mentioned in your description, I can tell you're already taking steps to improve things! It's great that you're aware of your emotions and interpersonal interactions, which have caused some problems. You're already seeking help on social media platforms, which is a great start! Keep up the great work!

The forced socialization you mentioned in your description is something many people face in real life, and you can absolutely conquer it! It's not easy, but you can do it. You have to participate in social situations due to practical reasons, but you can make it work for you.

However, this kind of socializing is something you are not very willing to do at the moment, so it also causes some distress for you. But don't worry! This is something you can work on.

Regarding the social interaction with your loved ones mentioned in your description, you also want to get closer! But at times, you want to escape and resent the excessive care and closeness shown between loved ones. This is because the sudden closeness of the relationship makes you feel uneasy in the moment. So you want to escape this unstable intimacy.

In this regard, I have also summarized some amazing methods to help you alleviate the current situation, which I really hope will help you to some extent.

(1) Regarding intimacy, you just don't know quite how to respond to it, which is why it feels like a problem to you right now. But you can slowly come to accept this kind of care and attention, because you deserve it!

(2) Give yourself some time to digest the psychological burden of intimacy. Even if you still can't quite accept it, you can maintain your current pace and face intimacy!

(3) When you're not feeling your best, there are so many ways to feel better! Try sports, chatting, journaling, music, and more. Don't let negative emotions take over — let's push them out with something positive!

(4) There are still so many people who need you! It's just that at the moment you might be a bit evasive when it comes to intimacy, but that's totally normal. You'll be able to act confidently in intimate relationships before you know it!

(5) You can do it! Try to encourage yourself more, and use positive self-suggestion to give yourself more courage to face the problems you encounter in real life.

The world and I love you!

Wishing you all the best!