Mortgage and car loan burdens are too heavy, causing me immense distress and frequent insomnia. What should I do?

Hello, friend.

The world is tough and life is hard. But you're doing well.

We have wasted our time, but we will get married and have children. These days, most people get married.

You want to get married, so you must be able to get along with the opposite sex.

We've had some setbacks buying a house, but we should stay positive about finding a partner. We'll meet someone right for us.

If you can't find time for exercise, see a psychologist. There's nothing serious, so don't worry.

It's just a cold, but we're affected by it.

Stress causes problems. It's hard to get rid of stress.

We can look at this differently.

You can save money, which shows you can work, have a stable salary, and make repayments. I believe you will be able to pay off your loan one day.

Take the pressure off your debt. Make the minimum repayment and spread it out over a longer period.

You are a good person, so don't worry.

You have high standards and enjoy life. You still have to live your life while repaying the loan.

You also need to be happy with your life. Then you need financial support.

This involves money. You know you can't play hard when you're old.

Enjoy your youth.

You can use the extra money to improve your quality of life.

If you're struggling, try working part-time. Find a balance that's comfortable for you.

Fear and anxiety go away.

When times get tough, close your eyes, take a deep breath, and repeat: I am loved and secure, so I am not afraid.

Wish: Be positive and content.

Dear Sir/Madam, From the information provided, it is evident that you have invested a great deal of time and effort into your career.

Given your experience in the workforce and your recent acquisition of a property, it is evident that you have achieved a significant milestone in your personal and financial life. Having a home is a crucial aspect of establishing a family, and your achievement in this regard is commendable. Regardless of the size of your property, having a house of your own is a valuable asset.

You have indicated that the 30-year mortgage term is a significant source of pressure, particularly given your age. Additionally, you have not yet moved in and are aware of market fluctuations, which has led to feelings of insecurity. The situation has also resulted in insomnia, which is a concern.

You have articulated the challenges faced by many young people striving to establish themselves in a challenging economic environment. They are striving to create a positive future for themselves, but the reality is that it is a difficult process.

It is not uncommon for individuals in their early to mid-thirties to experience feelings of anxiety in today's social environment.

First, I have been informed that the price of the property has been reduced for reasons that are unclear. I suggest that you begin by researching the current market conditions and consult with an informed real estate sales professional to ascertain whether the price has genuinely been reduced. Second, regarding the mortgage repayments, many individuals take out a mortgage for a period of 20-30 years, which is calculated based on their income and spending power at the time of the loan. Once the property is delivered, you can move in, and if the location is favorable, you can rent it out to generate a profit, but this should only be done if you can ensure that your own financial situation is not adversely affected.

From my analysis of your situation, it appears that your primary concern is the instability of your income, which is causing you to question your ability to afford the mortgage and daily living expenses. I recommend that you consider ways to increase your income, such as taking on a part-time job or seeking financial support from your family. Given the size of the mortgage, it is crucial to address this issue as soon as possible.

Furthermore, you indicated that repaying the vehicle loan represents a significant burden. If the car is a necessity for daily transportation and you are unable to forego its use, then it would be prudent to continue utilising it. However, if it does not offer any additional benefits, it may be more cost-effective to rely on public transportation, which could also help to reduce your overall expenditure. If you lack the time to pursue an additional source of income, then increasing your income and reducing your expenditure would still be the most effective way to manage your finances.

Naturally, these are merely a few suggestions. It is my sincere hope that you will soon find clarity and alleviate your distress.

Hello, dear!

I don't know if you have a stable job and a relatively stable income now, but I'm sure you'll get there! It's like some major events, such as buying a car or a house. While we own our own house and car, we must bear a certain amount of pressure, but it's worth it!

I think the exciting moment when we paid the down payment to buy the house, as well as the sense of security and accomplishment that the house brings, is also very fulfilling. It is also the envy of others and the lifestyle you are pursuing—and it's totally worth it!

Then the house and car are both paid for in installments, so you have the exciting opportunity to follow up and make more purchases! If you buy a house, you will also have the chance to spend a portion of the cost on subsequent renovations, and for the car, you will have the opportunity to pay insurance, so there are still a series of subsequent expenses. It is as if while you are using them, you are also bearing some financial output and subsequent costs for them, which is all part of the adventure!

So, when making these major decisions, did you consider some future plans? For example, how long is the installment period for the purchase, how much is the monthly payment, and what is the ratio to your income?

While ensuring that our daily lives are relatively carefree, comfortable, and free, we can also take on some of this pressure—and we can do it with a smile!

I can see that you made a great plan for yourself! You purchased the car and the house separately, and you bought them in stages. You're doing what you can, and you're making great progress!

It's totally normal to feel a bit bummed when you see that the price of the house has dropped. It's an indescribable feeling, but it's also a chance to regroup and try something new! And if the price of the house has gone up, you'll feel like you got a great deal and that your vision and judgment were spot on.

And what about the resources we use when we go shopping ourselves? If we have renovated the house and are now using it, including commuting to work by car, and using it often, then these are resources that are being used, and they are actually valuable.

There's absolutely no need to force yourself! The pressure of repaying the mortgage after eight or ten years is spread out over each month, and the cycle is complete after a few years. So, you can't say that you can't bear the pressure of repaying the mortgage for many years to come and put it all on yourself now. You definitely won't be able to bear it, so don't worry about it!

And while we see the pressure these things bring us, we should also see that they are also some of our own resources—and they're great ones at that!

Just like now, I have my own house, car, stable job, and a relatively good income. These are some of our very good external resources, which can give us a sense of security and protection. And in the marriage market, they also add points for yourself and give you certain advantages. For yourself alone, they are also a guarantee of your life—and a great one at that!

In everyone's life, there is more or less some pressure, and everyone has their own share of the burden. But it's also true that everyone has their own unique set of challenges and opportunities! Some people may have the privilege of supporting their families, some have the joy of paying for their children's education, some have the chance to support a mortgage, some have the opportunity to support a car, some have the chance to further their personal development, and so on.

Good day, Dear questioner,

My name is Yi Ming, and I am a heart exploration coach.

I empathize with your situation and am available to assist you in resolving it. I hope this provides some clarity.

1. The common phenomenon of stress in urban areas.

The majority of individuals with mortgages or car loans have encountered this type of pressure.

At times, it can be challenging.

You may even question the rationale for purchasing a property at this time.

This is a typical psychological state.

It would be advisable to reassure yourself and provide yourself with the greatest possible support.

As stated in the book "City and Stress," residing in an urban environment inevitably leads to feelings of stress.

Even in the absence of any action in an urban environment, a certain level of unease and stress is inevitable.

He stated that this is a human psychological mechanism and that we are not yet fully prepared to adapt to city life.

In particular, given the current uncertainty surrounding housing prices and long-term loans, it is to be expected that levels of stress will be higher.

It is evident that individuals who do not possess a house or a car are not immune to stress.

Such individuals may also be concerned about the feasibility of purchasing a home, particularly in light of the financial considerations associated with a down payment.

Given the prevalence of stress, it is crucial to possess effective coping mechanisms.

2. Take the initiative to identify a solution.

The purchase of a vehicle offers convenience and the potential to fulfill certain psychological needs.

The purchase of a vehicle offers convenience and the potential to fulfill certain psychological needs.

Ultimately, you are one of the car owners.

Housing is also a significant social issue in China.

For many young people, the cost of purchasing a house can be a significant barrier to pursuing their dreams.

Furthermore, the ability to make a down payment on a future home demonstrates a certain level of financial stability.

As for concerns such as "I heard from others that the price of the previous house I purchased has decreased" or "I am unsure if the house will be delivered on time," these issues have the potential to impact our emotional state.

It is important to take care of yourself at this time.

It is important to remember that purchasing a property is a personal decision that may involve certain risks. It is also advisable to focus less on potential future outcomes.

Naturally, this is not a straightforward process.

When faced with concerns related to this matter, it is advisable to refocus on the present.

Furthermore, it is important to have confidence in your ability to increase your income over time.

Furthermore, if you are employed, you will likely have access to a provident fund, which can assist in alleviating the financial burden associated with repayments.

Furthermore, you may envisage the satisfaction of handing over the keys to your new residence.

A long repayment period, an increase in future income, the possibility of early repayment, or a smaller repayment proportion of your income are all potential outcomes.

It is also important to create a sound financial plan and to allocate income in a reasonable manner.

It is important to ensure that repayments do not impact your current lifestyle.

From another perspective, although the situation may be challenging at present, it may prove valuable in the long term.

Therefore, when faced with negative emotions, it is advisable to take a step back and assess the situation.

Furthermore, there are numerous methods for addressing uncertainty.

There are also a number of ways in which uncertainty can be managed.

Prioritize the present, minimize focus on the future, and maintain a pragmatic approach to the present situation.

Gradually, circumstances may evolve.

Additionally, you may find solace in the knowledge that insomnia and pain are typical responses to the present circumstances.

Regardless of the level of discomfort experienced, it is unlikely to facilitate a positive outcome. It may be more beneficial to allow the body to recuperate through appropriate exercise, meditation, and a mindset of acceptance.

Please disseminate these messages.

Have confidence in yourself and in our society.

We will achieve a happy life.

Happiness is a state of mind.

I wish you the best of luck!

Hello, question asker! I can already feel the pressure in your words. Home mortgages and car loans are two heavy burdens on people, and I empathize with you because I also live and work in Beijing.

Your anxiety and unease come from worries and fears about the future. You're 35 and you don't see a happy family or a sense of security in your old age. You're stuck with an endless mortgage and car loan. You're confused and wondering what the point of life is.

The problem you're facing is one that many middle-aged people in Beijing, Shanghai, and Guangzhou are also grappling with. Look closer, and you'll see that everyone facing the same challenge has a different mindset and state of mind because everyone perceives stress differently.

Some people wrongly believe that stress is harmful to physical health and will shorten your life expectancy. This perception makes your stress threshold low, making you more sensitive to stress. Just the thought of stress sets off an alarm in your body and mind, putting you on guard, contracting, and in a state of tension. If this continues over a long period of time, your body and mind will suffer.

Some people believe stress is inevitable and that life is full of disappointments. They accept stress as an objective reality and do not resent or criticize it. As a result, the body becomes desensitized to stress, and the emotional and physical stress responses are not as strong. The blood vessels dilate, and the blood pressure and heartbeat fluctuate, but remain relatively stable. The source of stress is still there, but a change in perception reduces the impact of stress on us. Perception is a buffer.

Some people believe that a person's life is not just for themselves, but also for their family. They love themselves and their family. They face pressure with a fearless spirit because they have a sense of responsibility. They have an extra safe haven because of the mutual help, love, and respect between family members. They are not a burden; they are a driving force. Therefore, once the factors of responsibility and love are added, pressure becomes less scary.

Let me be clear: stress does not directly cause physical and mental illness. What causes physical and mental illness is the perception of stress. A positive perception of stress can help maintain physical and mental health. If you regard stress as your enemy, it will really become one. If you regard stress as a "being" and coexist with it, you will be fine. This is why some people cannot stand high-pressure environments, while others are stress-resistant and remain physically and mentally healthy.

Stress can also trigger the release of oxytocin, a hormone that fosters empathy and encourages us to seek comfort and support from others. When we receive care and attention from others, it not only benefits our mental and emotional well-being but also helps us improve our physical health. You are here because you are stressed, seeking help and a listening ear. You will receive advice, some of which may not be directly helpful, but one piece of advice might resonate with you and be beneficial. It is important to feel seen and heard, especially when you are facing challenges.

Stress is not useless. In fact, it can even help people actively seek interpersonal and intimate relationships. If everyone joins together to keep each other warm, encouraging, and comforting each other, life will not be too cold and bleak.

I am certain you will find like-minded people and companions to share your journey, and you will undoubtedly find your own spiritual home and haven. Despite the burdens you may face, you will feel warmth in your heart and see light before you. Best wishes!

Good morning.

People who have reached a certain stage in life have achieved something, but at the same time, they may feel they have lost something along the way. When they look back, they may naturally ask, "Is this all there is in life?"

It is understandable that everyone feels this way to some extent, as they may perceive both familiar and unfamiliar shadows in life, which can lead to questioning the meaning of life. However, if you listen carefully to the voice of wisdom within, it may offer guidance that this is a natural process of life and that it could also become a new turning point.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider your own value and sense of purpose in life.

At the age of 35, if he is not one of those who like to follow the crowd of people who read inspirational articles, then he must not be an idealist who talks about lofty ideals without any practical knowledge about how to assess one's own value correctly or how to anticipate the future and realize one's own value. Instead, he is someone who has both feet on the ground and at the same time has a clear plan and responsibility for achieving his goals in life. This type of person may not be particularly adept at expressing deep sorrow, but is adept at using his head and wisdom to navigate the many disappointments and setbacks in life. He is good at mediating himself, and has the ability to improve his own environment and experience life. Therefore, the accuracy of his feelings about life is more grounded and real. Although pain is unavoidable, he will not lose himself, and therefore will not lose the ability to feel happiness.

It is often the case that when people pursue high goals in life and happiness, they may find themselves giving up the pursuit of the former due to the pressure of reality (high competitive pressure). This can result in feelings of pain that are not too agonizing, but when they encounter obstacles in the pursuit of the latter, that is, happiness in life, they may find themselves losing themselves and looking tired. This is because people who cannot feel happiness inside may find it difficult to feel the value of themselves, that is, the sense of value of existence.

It is therefore suggested that if a person is able to find happiness, their passion, and a sense of purpose in life, they will be motivated to keep moving forward and feel the meaning of happiness in life.

It might be helpful to try to live with an ordinary heart, find ways to balance yourself, and strive to maintain a sense of balance in your life.

In terms of goals, if they truly align with his innermost aspirations, he will likely approach them with great seriousness. It's possible that in the pursuit of these goals, he may have had to make some personal sacrifices, including compromising his health and freedom to relax and spend time by himself. However, when the results don't match the effort and dedication he has invested, it's natural for him to experience a significant sense of disappointment.

Could it be that life has perhaps not delivered on its promises?

It is understandable to feel frustrated about life, but it is important to consider that this may not be the most objective way to view things. Having a more balanced outlook can help us achieve better results and gain more useful experiences. While we cannot predict the future or how we will feel tomorrow, we can be sure of the present moment. In an uncertain world, it is helpful to approach life with an open heart and mind to maintain balance, confidence, and resilience.

It would be beneficial to express gratitude for life and strive to enhance one's capabilities.

It would be fair to say that the feeling of buying a house for the first time and the feeling of getting a favorite toy when you were a child should be similar in terms of the happiness index. When the pressure of repayments dilutes the joy of buying a house for the first time, and when you long for new toys but your pocket money no longer allows you to buy other favorite toys, the experience of happiness will gradually decrease. In the end, it is possible that the sense of disappointment in life sometimes outweighs the expectations for life.

However, feelings can sometimes be misleading. When we face more challenging stages in life or observe others encountering even greater difficulties, we may unconsciously develop a sense of gratitude for our previous experiences. After all, it is often observed that God has a way of providing care and support to those who are suffering. In the quiet contrast between what may appear to be a bleak and uninspiring life and the unseen mercy and care, people are waiting to discover it and find hope in life.

Perhaps we could say that being grateful for life is actually being grateful for yourself. This could help to keep your heart from becoming too burdened with suffering, and allow you to view the world from a broader perspective. You might even become "great" along the way. In fact, the changes we make are not always many. Sometimes it is just an idea, but the feeling is completely different.

It would be beneficial to ensure that evaluations are objective and based on evidence.

In today's world, women are often perceived as "ruthless" or have different views on women. While everyone is entitled to their opinions, they should not be rigid beliefs. Instead, they should be open to change. When evaluating someone you've met, it's important to maintain a positive outlook and treat everyone with fairness and respect. You should greet the next person you meet with the attitude that "it will definitely be better," and then good luck will surround you.

It is important to recognize that our perception of things requires not only internal judgment, but also an objective definition that encompasses the whole. It is not possible for a minority group to rise to the definition of the whole group. It may be more beneficial to pray that the next person you meet is more suitable. In fact, it is a sincere gesture of praying to meet the inner desire, which can strengthen fate and help others perceive your needs.

It is therefore understandable that people may deceive others or even deceive themselves. Although this is a very extreme state, people can easily fall into this cycle without noticing. If you want to firmly walk your life well, you might like to consider constantly enriching your spiritual energy and ensuring it is not depleted, as this will give you more choices and help you to face the challenges of life with a clear mind.

Wishing you the best!

Most people buy a house or a car at some point. If you don't know what it's like to buy a house, it probably won't be a big problem for you. Following the way most people live and spending your life away is also acceptable, and there won't be too many problems.

From what you've told me, it's clear you're unhappy. You're carrying a mortgage and car loan, which has made you a slave to your house and car at the age of 30. It's causing you a lot of pain, insomnia, and may affect your physical health.

I came up with a word: to spend money to suffer. It's like a while ago when I listened to a friend's suggestion to get an essential oil back massage. It really hurt me to death. I will never spend money to suffer again, even if someone else is blowing their trumpet. I have to think about it and maybe it's not for me.

Similarly, you're suffering. Maybe the decision you made in the past isn't right for you, but there's no going back. This is especially true when buying a house or a car, which can lead to bankruptcy. You won't easily get a refund or have your contract cancelled. You were previously unemployed and are currently unmarried, so the pressure is likely to increase.

If you get married and have kids in the future, the pressure is estimated to increase threefold, which is something you should think about. You used all your savings to pay the down payment and buy a house, but you still have to pay the mortgage, and you won't be able to touch your house until two years later when it is delivered. Anything you can't touch may make you feel very uncomfortable and uneasy. If you are unhappy, it is best to talk to someone from the sales department again to see if you can go in regularly to put your mind at ease. I also recommend that you talk to someone about it psychologically. Good luck!

ZQ?

Dear Sir/Madam, I believe that your description of the issues you are facing is representative of those experienced by many people. It seems that the majority of individuals are experiencing pressure to repay loans, confusion about their career paths, and anxiety about remaining unmarried. I can discern that you are also suffering from these difficulties, displaying signs of anxiety and irritability.

I am here to assist you in resolving your issues.

In terms of finance, the individual is required to make monthly repayments on both the mortgage and car loan.

In terms of one's career, it is not uncommon for individuals to experience frequent changes in employment status. Currently, I am employed by a small company.

In terms of emotional well-being, the subject reports difficulty in forming positive relationships with women.

From a material perspective, the value of the house may have diminished, which is a source of distress, and there are concerns about the delivery of the house.

From the aforementioned analysis, it appears that you are experiencing a sense of despair and helplessness regarding the future. Therefore, I encourage you to look beyond the obstacles and challenges and to seek out the positive aspects of life.

It is reasonable to conclude that any individual would experience distress if their property experienced a decline in value. It is understandable that many would be reluctant to acknowledge this reality, particularly given the significant financial investment they have made in the property. The emotional distress associated with this situation is not easily articulated. However, it is probable that your family is not the only one facing this challenge. Many individuals who purchased property in the early stages of its development have encountered similar difficulties.

However, in terms of purchasing a residence, you have planned ahead very well. A residence is a person's home and also a capital for future matrimony. This initial intention is worth a thousand times its weight in gold.

The house has become a source of stress, financial obligation, and uncertainty, leading to feelings of anxiety and regret about the decision to purchase it.

Indeed, when one possesses one's own residence, one is not required to pay rent or relocate. One can establish a family with one's partner in that residence, and engage in daily cooking, which is a very practical and down-to-earth activity.

One might inquire as to the whereabouts of a prospective romantic partner and the reasons behind their continued absence.

It is possible that you have previously experienced some unhappy memories or encountered individuals who espouse more realistic and materialistic views, which may have resulted in a loss of confidence in matters pertaining to love and marriage.

It can be reasonably assumed that, among the millions of girls in the world, there is one who is destined to be with you. When one adjusts one's state of mind, it becomes possible to attract the right person. The law of attraction is a real and effective phenomenon. It is important to be clear about one's goal and to find a hostess for one's future home.

It is possible that you are currently experiencing feelings of low mood, depression, and a lack of personal agency, which may result in a sense of dissatisfaction with your circumstances. In such instances, it is important to prioritize self-care, acknowledge your emotions, and accept your current situation.

When an individual is in a low-frequency state, their energy field is also low, which results in the attraction of things that are of a similar low frequency and are therefore undesirable. However, when an individual adjusts their state of mind, raises their frequency, and becomes more grateful and joyful, they will attract high-frequency, beautiful people and things.

I empathize with the myriad disappointments that currently afflict your life. I hope you will swiftly emerge from your despondent state and illuminate your path forward with a beacon of hope.

I will be your companion on your journey of growth at Yixinli, and I extend my love and support to you.

Hello, landlord. I saw your question and felt your confusion and anxiety. Let me share some thoughts.

What does 35 mean to you?

Adult life is never easy.

However, planning and carrying out your life is something you need to think about at every age. You must take responsibility for yourself and not let others influence you.

What are the reasons for getting a mortgage or car loan?

An adult's material life reflects their inner state and pursuits.

A house gives us stability, while a car gives us freedom. We often mistake these things for the purpose of life. We must recognize this and adjust our perceptions.

Life is a process of change. We must adapt.

We can change how we think about it as we grow older.

Think about your worth.

Know yourself. Self-knowledge is the most important thing in your life.

Reflection helps us discover our inner strength, grow, and return to our true selves.

Our inner desires influence our judgments and decisions. There is no right or wrong, suitable or unsuitable. We must understand this within ourselves. It is the driving force of our inner survival and external lives.

All emotions are caused by going against our inner drive. Rekindling the spark within us is what lights up our lives.

Best wishes!

Hello, friend, I saw your message and I empathize with the pressure, confusion, and disorientation you're experiencing.

Perhaps we could explore the issues you're concerned about together?

I would like to address the perception of women.

In your article, you describe how you find modern women difficult to deal with.

I'm curious to know how the women you meet get along with you. Could you tell me how many girlfriends you've had in total?

I'm not sure what happened between you and your girlfriend that made you feel this way. Could you please clarify what you mean by "disgusting" and "difficult"?

I'm not in a position to comment on your feelings given the lack of information in this case. However, I feel it's important to say that not all women are like this, and such people are also in the minority. It seems that we are making some generalizations and assumptions that may not be entirely objective.

It is to be expected that conflicts will arise in any friendship, given the inevitable differences in our living environments, growth experiences, outlooks on life, and values. However, a good relationship is one that is built on mutual acceptance, a willingness to find common ground while respecting differences, and an openness to discussing any issues openly and honestly.

Once the initial adjustment period has passed, two people who truly love and appreciate each other can continue to move forward together.

I also hope that you will not let any obstacle prevent you from finding happiness, and that you will give yourself and others more opportunities to do so.

With regard to mortgages and car loans,

It would be fair to say that a significant proportion of families, particularly those in the prime of life and career, have some form of loan.

We often take out loans to enjoy a high-quality life early on. It's natural to experience stress, but we can choose how we respond to it.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider what we have gained rather than what we have lost. This could help to reduce our anxiety.

For instance, having purchased a vehicle with a loan, you are able to enjoy the benefits of having a car at an early stage in life. Regardless of the weather conditions, we are no longer required to wait for the bus. We are able to travel at our convenience, whether for work or personal reasons, which greatly enhances our efficiency and quality of life. We can also embark on impromptu journeys at any time, thanks to our own vehicle. Just contemplating these possibilities brings a sense of joy, doesn't it?

Regarding mortgages,

In today's world, it's becoming increasingly challenging for individuals from all walks of life to afford a home outright. For many, the only option is to wait until retirement to live in the home of their dreams, though it's important to consider that a larger home may not be the best choice in the long run. With the option of taking out a loan, it's clear that we have the ability to repay it. This allows us to use a loan to move into a home that we love early on and enjoy a stable life. Having a home can bring a sense of security and stability that is often missing from a wandering life.

It might be helpful to think of paying off a mortgage as similar to buying the things we need to eat, drink, and live. It's not necessary to take it too seriously. As long as we work hard step by step, we will be fine. Many people live this way, so there's no need to feel anxious. This is a common characteristic and trend of this era.

It is a positive sign when you are able to purchase a car and a house. It shows that you have plans for the future and are capable of making decisions that will benefit you. It is also important to recognize that not everyone has the same opportunities. You should be proud of yourself for taking control of your financial future.

If I might ask, could I inquire about insomnia?

It's understandable that some people have trouble sleeping. It's natural to worry about things from time to time, but if you dwell on the negative aspects of a situation, it can lead to anxiety and insomnia.

It's impossible to predict what the future holds, but if we make the most of the present, it's likely that the future will be positive.

You mentioned that you plan to be older when you pay off the mortgage. However, there's no need to wait until then to move in. You can start living in the house as soon as it's built. And if it's financially feasible for you, you can consider paying off the mortgage early.

For instance, the term of our mortgage was 20 years, and at the time my husband was facing some challenges. However, I believed that if others could do it, and we were reasonably competent at our jobs, then we could too. I tried to remain calm and worked hard, saving as much as I could. As a result, we were able to pay it off in five years. Of course, we also had some support from both sets of parents. If we hadn't had their support, we might have needed a bit longer, given that the mortgage is fixed and our salaries keep rising.

I would gently encourage you not to worry, but to take your time.

I hope my message will be helpful or inspiring to you! I wish you the best!

Hugging you, I can tell you're feeling a bit anxious right now.

It's totally understandable to feel anxious about the pressure of real life. It can be overwhelming when you have an outstanding car loan, a new mortgage, and the added stress of a falling house price.

All of this can really weigh on you, like you're carrying a heavy burden in your life. You work hard, and you're still not finding the ease and happiness you deserve. It's natural to question the meaning of your efforts sometimes.

I think we can start by looking at your stress.

It seems like the stress you're feeling is mostly related to your mortgage and car loan. I think it would be really helpful for you to take some time to think about why these things are making you feel this way.

You can write down everything that comes to mind, and don't worry about whether it's right or wrong. Here are some questions to help you get started:

I'd love to hear more about how you feel about the mortgage and car loan. When you think about them, do you feel nervous and anxious? If so, can you describe exactly where in your body you feel it?

I'd love to know more about this uncomfortable feeling. I'm really curious about why mortgages and car loans make you feel this way.

I'd love to hear how you feel your life has changed since taking out the mortgage and car loan. And I'm really interested to know how you feel about these changes!

We hope these questions will be helpful for you as you try to understand your own stress.

I'd love to help you find ways to deal with your stress.

First, let's think about how we can help you relieve your stress. What changes in your current life or state would make you feel better?

I'd love to know how you feel about the distance between your current situation and your desired situation. What do you think you can do to feel more comfortable with this distance?

Second, it's really important to express the pain and anxiety in your heart. For example, try communicating with your trusted family members and friends. Tell them how you feel, listen to their feedback, or also listen to them vent about their stress. You may find that you are not alone, and this feeling may make you feel a little better.

I really think you should try getting into an intimate relationship. I see that you say that you are currently unmarried, and you always feel that women nowadays are disgusting and difficult to get along with.

I'm really sorry to hear that you've had a bad experience in an intimate relationship. It can be really tough to feel like women nowadays are impossible to get along with, especially when you've had such a bad experience.

However, a good intimate relationship can truly give a person a sense of support, worth, and meaning. It also involves a certain amount of responsibility, but it's so worth it! It's a great idea to try to take more opportunities to enter into intimate relationships, which can really help relieve some of your stress.

I really hope these suggestions will inspire you!

Wishing you the very best! With warm regards,

Good day, question asker. It is a pleasure to meet you. Let us proceed to explore this together.

I am currently unmarried and find it challenging to maintain harmonious relationships with women.

Secondly, there are the financial pressures of mortgages and car loans.

The individual also expressed regret over previous decisions and concern about the prospect of aging.

4. Anxiety, restlessness, and painful insomnia.

I am unaware of the nature of the women with whom the questioner has been in contact. It is possible that some of the female friends the questioner has previously encountered have not met the questioner's expectations. However, it is recommended that the questioner take their time, alter their environment and relocate, as this will facilitate the questioner's ability to meet a suitable partner with whom to spend the remainder of their life.

Do not lose hope. When the opportune moment arises, seize it. It is also beneficial to have a support system in place to navigate the challenges and celebrate the successes.

Many individuals are experiencing financial strain due to mortgages and car loans. It is essential to adopt a proactive approach and address these obligations with resilience. Additionally, fluctuations in housing prices are a normal part of the market.

It is unproductive to dwell on past decisions. The future is inherently unpredictable.

It is unclear whether the questioner is aware of the saying "a sound financial foundation can solve 70% of problems." The questioner is an individual with their own ideas and a wealth of work experience. How can you advance your career?

It must be working diligently and getting down to work with a clear focus. This will help minimize distracting thoughts.

What kind of life does the questioner envision for themselves? As General Secretary Xi Jinping said, "Happiness comes from hard work." We are all busy people, striving for stability and happiness.

Regardless of the challenges, a resilient individual will persevere and continue forward.

I hope you achieve success in your career and enjoy good health.

I hope you find this information useful.

Hello, dear question asker! Please take a seat, enjoy a cup of tea, and take in some fresh air.

Don't let the anxiety in your words and the pressure in reality get you down, my friend.

I'll break down your text into two parts, and I'll be totally honest with you:

1. Emotion Frustration

2. Loan pressure

(1) I'm sure that by the age of 35, you've already experienced a lot of ups and downs. It's only natural to feel like women nowadays are difficult to deal with and impossible to get along with!

At the end of the day, relationships are a two-way street. By shifting the problem from yourself to the woman, you might miss out on seeing your own issues and might not grow as much as you could in your relationships. The best way to make progress is to start with yourself. You can't change "women nowadays," but you can work on your own intimacy. Intimacy is something you can learn over time. The questioner wants to change their situation quickly, but that's not something you can do overnight. You'll get the best results by taking it slow, starting from within, learning constantly, understanding constantly, and changing constantly.

(2) You made the decision to take out a mortgage to buy a house three years ago, even though you still had a car loan to pay off. I'm sure you were mentally prepared to pay the loan off over 30 years, and you were able to afford it!

Don't worry about the loan. It's a common path that many people take. Be proud of yourself for having the courage to take this step. You're taking on a social responsibility by choosing to move forward with a heavy load. It's admirable that you want a car and a house. These are big goals, and you should also strive to achieve them for 30 years. This is a way of life. Since you've chosen this path, don't look back. You've got this!

I can see that you're feeling frustrated about the falling house prices. It's natural to feel worried when things change, and it's understandable that you're feeling stressed and unable to sleep. I just wanted to let you know that I believe your situation will improve with time and effort. You've got this! I'm sure your life will get better and better. And it's not just you — it's a general trend in society.

I truly believe that with your incredible drive, sense of responsibility, and commitment, you can absolutely do it!