You need to give yourself a warm hug. From your description, I can tell you have strong inner feelings of self-rejection, confidence-and-mild-self-doubt-in-the-future-9475.html" target="_blank">inferiority, and lack of confidence.
A person's relationship with others is a reflection of their relationship with themselves. If you don't fully accept yourself, it's difficult to feel the kindness and friendliness of the people around you.
Once you are aware of your behavior, you can change it. For example, if you realize that you are too quick to anger, you can take the initiative to explore and identify the underlying needs driving your anger. When you feel your anger rising, you can take deep breaths, acknowledge your angry emotions, and explore the hidden needs behind them.
You can also record your painful emotional feelings in writing by keeping an emotional diary. This will help you to better perceive and understand your emotions. Remember, emotions are neither good nor bad, right nor wrong. You need to see, accept and respond to them.
Behind every emotion is an unmet expectation or need.
Be aware of what needs you want to express by hurting yourself. These include gaining attention, being valued, being cared about, and the desire to hurt yourself to make close family and friends feel a certain sense of guilt and change the way they treat you. The possibility of these needs being met is too small.
You must understand yourself and your needs clearly if you want to express them honestly and courageously to others. This requires a process. You have to be able to perceive and record your emotional feelings promptly and respond appropriately in your daily life.
I am Lily, the little listener at the Q&A Center. The world and I love you.


Comments
I can relate to feeling overwhelmed and the frustration that comes with it. It's important to recognize these feelings and how they affect you. Have you considered talking to a professional who could provide support and guidance? Sometimes just sharing what you're going through with someone who understands can be incredibly relieving.
It sounds like you've been experiencing a lot of intense emotions lately, and it's okay to feel this way. The thoughts you're having about not being loved and the fear of rejection are tough, but remember that your value isn't determined by others' perceptions. Maybe reaching out to a therapist could help you explore these feelings in a safe space and work on understanding yourself better.
Feeling this mix of anger, loneliness, and uncertainty is really challenging. It seems like you're questioning a lot about yourself and your relationships. With the family history of mental illness, it might be beneficial to seek professional advice to get a clearer picture of your mental health. There's no shame in asking for help; it's a brave step towards taking care of yourself.