Sometimes suppressed, lacking interest, why aren't we as happy as before now?

If one were to close their eyes for an extended period, one could recall all the instances in which they made a decision autonomously or recognize that they never exercised such autonomy.

— Frederick Backman, The Life List

In the past, it was possible to work assiduously towards a goal and strive to obtain the things one wanted. Upon achieving success after considerable effort, one was filled with joy.

As individuals age, a variety of responsibilities and constraints necessitate the maintenance of a delicate equilibrium at all times. There is a pervasive concern that even the slightest deviation from this equilibrium may have adverse consequences.

Gradually, it becomes the foundation of our existence, and we live less and less in accordance with our true selves. In the process of attrition, our passion fades, and we become indifferent. Perhaps it is not optimal, but "just about right" is sufficient.

In our youth, despite the pressure, we kept moving towards our goals. The sweat on the court, the tears after the exam, no matter how difficult it was, we were always so brave. In contrast, childhood is often characterised by a lack of responsibility and the pursuit of happiness without the burden of significant costs. Even a small amount of happiness can provide a sense of warmth throughout the day.

The elements of wind, rain, and mud can be transformed into playthings in our hands, which we use to pursue our own forms of happiness.

Despite the pressure, during our youth we continued to pursue our objectives. We demonstrated fortitude in the face of adversity, whether it manifested as perspiration on the court or tears after an examination.

As we age, our lives gradually become less independent, and each day is no longer solely our own. We tend to repeat our daily routines, leading similar lives day after day.

Even when there is something we wish to pursue, it is often swiftly dismissed. We have traditionally viewed this as a way of releasing ourselves from the demands of daily life. However, it can also be seen as an admission of our own limitations.

One's current situation may become so familiar that one is no longer aware of the emotional state it evokes. Even a seemingly minor action may be perceived as a threat to the status quo, leading to hesitation and a lack of courage to take the initiative.

Do you recall the commitments you made during your younger, more carefree years?

Have you maintained contact with your former associates?

Have you persisted in exerting effort on your own behalf?

Have you been anticipating a specific encounter?

Have you achieved the life you sought to live?

The passage of time does not cease simply because one elects to pursue a conventional existence. Each individual traverses a unique trajectory, whether imbued with fervor or characterized by a more straightforward trajectory. How might one's genuine aspirations be confined to a singular mode of expression?

Hello, question asker!

From your description, I can totally understand your current depression and depression.

I'm a little confused, but I'm excited to hear more! When you describe it as "no interest in people or holidays, even depression, and nothing to be interested in,"

When you think about your current state, what is your mood?

When I see you confused, I'm excited to help you understand this is open-mindedness!

I think you are absolutely right! You want to feel better, and you know what you have to do? Adjust your perception and accept this state of mind as "open-minded."

Absolutely! When we want to adjust our perceptions to improve our emotional state, this actually also expresses our desire for happiness.

If we want to be happy, then we absolutely have to think about

Absolutely! The things we do in the present, in life, can be helpful to this goal.

If it does, then we can definitely try to persevere and continue to experience life, paying attention to all the amazing, positive experiences it has to offer!

If that doesn't help, we can also think about why we were happy before but not now. What has changed in the meantime? Let's find out together!

Let's discover how we can use past experiences to bring happiness back!

If we actively experience life, awaken those positive emotions, and increase our satisfaction with life,

Then, we'll finally understand why we're not as happy as we once were!

I've got some great tips for you!

1. Create some amazing surprises to increase the joy in your life!

We often tend to ignore the familiar and only notice the new. So it's a great idea to surprise yourself regularly! And it's even better to surprise each other with the people around you. For example, you could surprise them with an unexpected cup of milk tea!

2. Focus on the happy experience and soak it up!

We can also share the experience at the time, or keep things that can evoke happy and pleasant memories. In life, please be generous in accepting praise and blessings, be grateful, and enjoy life to the fullest!

3. Observe!

All the senses are open, we concentrate on the details, we slow down, and experience life with our hearts. We see the world in a whole new way!

In life, we often neglect many things that are of great significance, just like the young monk in the following story:

After three years of hard training, the young monk came to his master, knowing all there was to know about the Buddhist teachings and ready for his master's test.

"I have a question to ask," the master said, his voice brimming with excitement.

"Excuse me," the young monk replied, his eyes alight with excitement.

"Should the flowers in the hallway be placed to the left or right of the umbrella?"

The young monk withdrew, a little embarrassed, and embarked on three more years of ascetic practices.

4. Go out there and actively seek to feel satisfied!

It's actually quite simple! We just want to do something challenging and technical, concentrate fully, have a clear goal, and get immediate feedback. When we are deeply involved in what we are doing, we feel a sense of control, and at the same time, we forget about time and feel as if it has come to a standstill.

If we can change our negative thoughts about the past and focus on the positive experiences of the present and the positive expectations of the future, we will no longer be troubled by the question of why we were happier before. And that's something to get excited about!

Let's gain a better emotional state of ourselves, experience more of ourselves in life, and evoke more of ourselves with positive emotions!

I wish you all the best! Have an amazing day!

Hello, host! I really hope my answer can help you in some way.

The host said that no matter if it's a holiday or in a crowd, he doesn't feel any ups and downs in his mood. He's neither happy nor unhappy, but sometimes he feels very depressed. There's nothing that interests him. You want to know if this is being open-minded, right?

Oh, and here's another thing! True open-mindedness isn't about being calm as water or having a heart as still as stagnant water. It's not about being uninterested in everything.

True open-mindedness is the ability to remain calm in the face of pain and difficulties. It's the power to face others' comments with equanimity, knowing what you are like and what you want. It's not letting a few comments from others make you resentful. It's the ability to devote yourself fully to what you want to do and to accept it calmly when you don't achieve the expected result.

I'm so excited to tell you that I don't think you're being open-minded. I think you're in a state of emotional isolation. Let me give you a big hug! I don't know what you've been through recently, but I'm here for you. Is there something very special that happened?

No matter what happens, I really hope you can find a way to express your feelings and emotions! Don't suppress them, because they won't just disappear. They'll come back in a more intense way, either as depression or anger. But you can solve these problems by releasing them regularly. That way, you'll stay happy and healthy!

There are so many ways you can release your emotions!

1. Socialize with the right friends and talk about your worries and confusions. It's so important to find the right friends! Look for people who can give you support and encouragement, and who you feel comfortable with. We can find the right people to talk to, spend time with, and socialize with. Spend time chatting, eating, gathering together, talking about our worries, feeling their support and love, and finding a sense of belonging in socializing. It's so important to have people in your life who love and support you!

2. Go exercise, do those sports you like, and feel the incredible rush of relaxation as you improve your physical fitness. Feel the strength of your body and the joy in your heart through exercise, and help yourself regain a fantastic state of mind and body!

2. Go for a run, play some tennis, or do whatever sport you love! Not only will you relax your body and mind, but you'll also get in shape. Feel the strength of your body and the joy in your heart through exercise, and help yourself regain a good state of mind and body!

3. Get ready to dive deep! Using the method of writing therapy, write down all your inner feelings and thoughts on paper. Don't worry about whether the handwriting is clear and neat, or about the logic of the content. Just express your feelings to the best of your ability!

Writing therapy is an amazing way to heal yourself through expressive writing. This type of writing is all about exploring your inner world and expressing your thoughts and feelings. It's a form of introverted writing that's directed inward toward the mind itself. The goal is to experience catharsis and express yourself in a creative way. It's different from other practical genres of writing, like literature, plays, and novels. These are called extroverted writing because they're more outwardly focused.

Psychoanalytic theory reveals the incredible news that the core source of writing is the subconscious, involving the bottom layer of the mind's structure. This means that expressive writing is actually a way to make the subconscious conscious – how amazing is that?

And that's why writing has such a healing effect!

The wonderful thing about writing is that it allows us to feel our deepest emotions, express our deepest needs, think about our deepest understandings, and even sublimate our deepest mind.

The great thing about writing is that you don't have to worry about being neat or logical. It's a fantastic way to learn to communicate with yourself and listen to your inner needs and fears.

When we truthfully record what is happening in the present moment and truthfully record our inner feelings without any concealment, we are actually putting our absolute trust in life!

When writing, it's so important to open our hearts and minds to write, to faithfully record what is happening in front of us, and to express our hearts directly!

"Writing for the Soul" mentions something really interesting. If all you write is rubbish, and you've been writing rubbish for three months, it means that this rubbish has been accumulating in your heart for much longer than three months. So when we write it out, we get to explore those shadows in our hearts that we've always been reluctant to face!

Embrace your inner voices! When you stop avoiding them, you'll be free from fear of other people's judgments.

This is the amazing idea behind writing therapy! It doesn't teach you how to write beautiful words. Instead, it helps you explore yourself through writing and presents a beautiful mind!

4. Punch pillows and sandbags to release your anger by hitting soft objects. It's a great way to let out all that pent-up frustration!

5. Try the amazing empty chair technique to release those emotions! If you can't find the right person to talk to, you can use the empty chair technique. Imagine the person you want to talk to (someone who can give you support, encouragement, and comfort) is sitting in the chair, and then talk to them as much as you like. You can also imitate their attitude to give yourself support, comfort, and encouragement. You can also imagine the person you want to abuse is sitting in the chair, and then express yourself as much as you like (anger and abuse are fine) to get those feelings out!

6. Take a walk in nature and feel your connection with it! You are just a part of nature, and that's pretty amazing. It's ordinary and extraordinary all at once. You're small, but you're also unique. When we're in nature, we'll feel relaxed and have different feelings and experiences.

7. Draw a mandala! Mandala drawing is a fantastic way to calm your mood. For example, "The Secret Garden" is an excellent choice.

8. Record three good things in your life every day and feel the positive side of

8. Record three good things in your life every day, feel the positive side of life, and feel your sense of well-being soar!

The good news is that we don't have to worry about the same dangers our ancestors did. But our anxiety gene is still there, so we still get anxious sometimes.

The good news is that we don't have to worry about the same dangers our ancestors did. Modern life is long past those dangers, but our anxiety genes are still there, so we can still get a big anxiety from a small danger. But here's the best part: we are not encountering a big tiger, but just a little cat! So, relax, life is not that bad...

It's a great idea to record three good things in your life every day to enhance your happiness!

Here's an awesome tip: Record three good things in your life every day to supercharge your happiness!

And now for something really fun! Write down all the amazing things that have happened to you recently. It could be something as simple as calling a good friend, or something as big as passing an exam. And don't forget to thank whoever deserves it, whether it's yourself, your family, your friends, or even nature!

It's so simple! Just record each event in a sentence, and you can also add a sentence to upgrade gratitude. Record what makes you happy in life and what you have done. It can be something small like calling a good friend, or something big like passing an exam. Whoever is worth thanking, you can thank yourself, family, friends, nature...

And the best part is, you can even experience the feelings this event brings you while you're writing! Once you're done, you can share it with your family, friends, or even strangers. You can even invite your family and friends to participate together!

And there's more! While writing, you can also reflect on the feelings that the event brought you. After you finish writing, you can share it with family, friends, or even strangers. You can also invite family and friends to participate together.

9. Enrich your life! Keep yourself busy, do the things you like, read your favorite books, learn an instrument, join a club, go hiking, go jogging, paint...

9. Enrich your life! Keep yourself busy, do the things you like, read your favorite books, learn an instrument, join a club, go hiking, go jogging, paint...

10. Read! Read books that make you feel comfortable. Good books can heal you. Through dialogue with the books, you will gain enlightenment and tranquility within, and you will also know how to act!

11. Meditate regularly. Meditation is a fantastic way to calm your mood. By connecting with your deeper self, you'll get to know yourself better than ever before. With long-term practice, you'll reap the amazing rewards of inner peace and joy!

I truly believe that when our inner emotions can flow and express themselves more freely, our emotions can be channeled in a timely manner. This will lead to a continuous improvement in your inner energy and a heart that becomes more and more stable. In addition, I also suggest that you continue to grow and learn, and continue to improve yourself. This is the only way to grow our inner strength! Of course, before we change ourselves, please accept yourself first. On the basis of affirming yourself and accepting and understanding yourself, continue to grow, and slowly, you will get closer and closer to what you call "open-minded"!

Wishing you the very best of luck and sending you all my best wishes!

Good day.

A person with a troubled heart may find it challenging to embrace any belief, but when they feel a sense of concern or heartache, they may find comfort in the seemingly ordinary joys and sorrows. It is important to learn to understand ourselves so that we can avoid self-blame, compromise, or becoming numb to the pain caused by others or the environment.

There was a child who had an especially large collection of toys. At first, everyone thought that he would share them with the other children, but it became apparent that this was not the case. The toys were his, and he had the right to distribute them, so no one could blame him... Later, he was left all alone, with no friends nearby. He began to be willing to share his toys in exchange for attention and friends, and his expression began to relax...

It seems that he may not be as strong as he believes, strong enough to be selfish without limits. It is often said that the world rewards you according to how you treat it. Many believe that the eyes are the windows to the heart. When we see bad and good situations, if we take a moment to consider our own heart and feel the real needs of our heart, we may find that we are not confused by the immediate scene and can continue to follow our own path with determination.

The happiness and unhappiness that the original poster feels are emotions produced under the original perception. It is generally understood that people's emotions do not remain the same, but rather follow a parabolic curve, with emotions of joy, anger, sorrow, and happiness occurring at irregular intervals. However, they will still return to a constant line, which is the ability to love. It could be said that a person with the ability to love themselves is a person who loves life, and then their world will have warmth. This warmth will inevitably warm others as well, and they will interact and support each other in both the visible and invisible environments.

If you're interested in changing your state of mind, you might consider adjusting your original perception. While it's true that things aren't always as good as they seem, it's probably best not to take everything to heart.

[Viewing the world and oneself correctly]

It could be said that a strong self and a weak self perceive the world in different ways.

A strong self may perceive the world as a place of peace, while a weak self may perceive it as a place of oppression.

It is therefore understandable that when imagining how the world feels, people are likely to be somewhat subjective and biased. In order to avoid extremes, it may be helpful to try to eliminate negative thoughts, learn to view the world in a more positive way, and consider your own thoughts from a more objective perspective. This could help to make your thoughts more rational and avoid extreme views.

[Consider learning to relax and live in the present.]

Love and hate are like the brothers Ruan, and the same can be said of other emotions. Each has its own emotional roots. When a person feels that life is tasteless, it may not necessarily mean that they have truly let go inside. It could be that they are unsure of how to deal with the pain and are in a state of helpless compromise. However, there is no need to feel discouraged by this, nor to put undue pressure on ourselves to have an explanation that convinces us. When faced with emotional confusion, we can temporarily learn to relax and let go. After all, there is nothing more meaningful than living in the present and feeling alive.

It would be beneficial to be aware of yourself and provide yourself with comfort.

When we were young, we had the company of our family, but as adults, few of us can afford such luxuries. It is therefore inevitable that we will encounter confusion and accumulate problems over time. Crossing this threshold is a new growth experience. If you are unable to cross it, you may benefit from learning to be aware of yourself internally, learn to take care of yourself, let your emotions be soothed, and have the ability to love yourself. This could be a helpful step towards being able to love others and the world.

It is often our inclination to prioritize self-care and self-love after we have extended love and care to others. However, this order of things may not be the most optimal. It is possible that a different sequence of events could lead to a healthier approach to love.

I wish you well and hope that the world treats you kindly.

Hello, question asker!

Let's talk through what you told me.

You're 28 and nothing brings you joy.

Sometimes you feel depressed and uninterested.

Question asker, this is hard. You can't enjoy life.

These are the questions that need to be answered.

How long has this been going on?

What happened before? Can you remember?

What was the emotional experience and how did you respond? How is your sleep now? Is it normal?

If you can't concentrate and your sleep has been poor for several months, see a doctor.

What interests you?

What situations would be good for you?

Can you think about what you were feeling at the time?

What's the difference when you're not suppressing? If your ideal state is 10 and the opposite is 1, what's your current state?

Why did you get this score? What would make you improve by one point?

Who can help you improve by one point?

If you improve by one point, what will you notice? Who can help you?

Question owner, answer these questions one by one. This is a simple process.

How do you adjust yourself?

Sometimes you feel depressed. How do you cope with this and adjust yourself?

How do you stay strong? How long does it take to recover?

Find a counselor.

If the tests are normal and you want to feel better, you can find a counselor on Yixinli and let them help you reach your goal.

I hope my answer helps.

Hello, question owner!

You're 28, which is the prime of life. There's a saying that goes: "Seventeen and eighteen are wasted years; twenty-seven and twenty-eight are the prime of life; thirty-seven and thirty-eight are the years of decline; forty-seven and forty-eight are worse than the previous year." You're in the prime of life, and the future should be slowly unfolding before you, full of endless possibilities. You can't say that you're too young to dream, and you may still be in the afterglow of your dreams.

I think it's important for you to understand your current state of mind, given your age. I suspect something must have happened in recent years that has affected you. You might not have realized it at the time, but it's likely that it's been affecting you subconsciously, which has led to your current lack of interest in anything.

I know there are bound to be disappointments in our lives, and it's only natural to feel this way. But it shouldn't be this much. As you described it to me, whether it's the holidays or being in a crowd, there are no ups and downs in your mood, no joy, no unhappiness. You feel particularly numb. In that case, I feel that you must have definitely experienced something very sad.

I know that mental illness needs to be treated with a mental cure, so you have to think about the relationship between work and personal life, some stories in life, and you can only solve it by finding specific events. Of course, it may not be easy for you to trace the source yourself. I think, if conditions permit, you can find a psychological counselor and let them talk about this state of mind, so that they can help you find the cause of this state of mind in a targeted way, which will allow you to embark on the road to a happy life as soon as possible.

If your finances are tight, you don't need to see a counselor because your situation is pretty common. In other words, at least 1/5 of your peers are in the same boat. You might not be able to get out of it, but you should be able to live a normal life. So don't panic. We all want a better and happier life, even if we can't afford a counselor.

If you can't afford to go to a counselor, you can still find ways to help yourself. For example, you can write down how you're feeling and why.

What's my plan for this? And what about the future?

Or how did this happen? Wait, anyway, you should write down everything that happens around you, every day, and then reflect on it. I think if you keep doing this for a long time, you will definitely find a way out of your problems. In psychology, writing is also a form of healing.

You can also check out the Yixinli platform book club for lectures from various experts. These lectures will be helpful for your future too. Check out the story collection and write your own stories. In short, I just want you to get moving and not just keep your thoughts to yourself. You must find a place to express them.

I hope to see a happy, engaged you at work!

Hello? Questioner, I saw your description and it seems like you're going through a rough patch. Let me give you a warm hug first!

1.

There are a few signs that you might be experiencing mild depression. These include feeling that life is meaningless, having no appetite, and not feeling like you're worth anything.

2.

Leonardo da Vinci said that exercise is the source of all life, and that it can give you more strength and inspire a love of life!

3.

Are you feeling down because of a relationship or work issues? Being aware of your state is the first step to making a positive change!

Your emotional state is a key indicator of depression. However, in true depression, your low mood must last for at least two weeks and significantly impact your social functions (such as schoolwork, daily tasks, socializing, etc.). You may also experience a lack of interest in things and a sense of meaninglessness and exhaustion in everything you do. I've experienced this myself. It occurred during the three years of high school when the pressure to study was intense, and again before and after becoming pregnant and giving birth. However, I managed to overcome it. Keeping a diary and processing your emotions can be extremely beneficial.

When you're feeling up to it, you can also find a friend to chat with, which can help relieve some of the pressure.

4.

If you have the time, take a walk outside and enjoy the scenery. If you can afford it, take a trip. You'll be amazed at how blue the sky is, how vast the sea is, and how beautiful the world is! It's a great way to relax.

5.

You can also talk to the listening therapists or counselors on this platform. They're more professional and can answer your questions quickly, help you sort out the past, move towards the future, and live in the present!

I wish you the best and hope that my sharing can be helpful and inspiring. Stay strong; the difficulties are only temporary, and everything will be fine!

When did you first notice these issues? Was it something that happened, someone, or a family situation?

Once we know what's causing it, we can target the solution more effectively.

I've had this problem before, but it didn't last long. I made myself unhappy because of some people, and I lost faith in many things.

I feel like my life has lost its meaning and purpose.

My logical self knows this isn't the way my life should be, and I need to make myself happy, but it's tough to do.

Ultimately, I found a friend from childhood who I could rely on. We spend time together, chatting, laughing and going out for meals. We also go to the movies together.

He also takes me hiking and on trips to see the best views.

When I climb a mountain, I like to go see the sunset in the afternoon. The view is really stunning and it helps me feel a bit better.

Sometimes he takes me to do exciting things. I was really nervous on the Ferris wheel, but it really helped. I don't dwell on the negative.

I was really nervous and scared, and I would yell and scream. Once I let it all out, I felt really different.

You can do a lot of similar things, and it will help.

You're 28 now, so it's time to start thinking about your goals and ideals.

It's tough to be happy when you're feeling down. And the opposite is also true: if you're happy, you're less likely to feel depressed.

I hope this helps.

Hello! Your description makes me think of a Buddhist.

The situation you describe is more appropriately described as "Buddhist."

I believe you still hope for happy experiences. I don't know what festive occasions or parties in your memory you were happier at.

Tell me what happened at that time. I want to know what the main situations were that triggered your happiness.

Tell me what positive meaning those happy memories had for you at the time.

If you can clearly perceive the previous emotional ups and downs, it means you have a clear perception of external things. Your perception of external affairs seems less sensitive, which is a change in acceptance.

Tell me what it is like when you feel depressed.

You need to experience the time when that depression came, what state you were in at the time, what circumstances, and what happened to make you feel depressed.

Tell me what depression reminds you of. And what does it want to tell you?

Depression wants you to see it as it really is.

Talk to the repression and see what it means to you. This is the best way to understand yourself better.

I am Fangyuan, a psychological counselor. Best wishes!

Good morning, I hope this message finds you well. I am contacting you today regarding a query you posted on our website. Please let me know if this is not the correct way to contact you. Kind regards,

From my review of your description, I understand that you may be experiencing some confusion or dissatisfaction with your current situation.

I believe this feeling is the result of a gradual process rather than a sudden occurrence.

This sentiment can be likened to a lack of grounding. At times, it may appear that you possess an open-minded disposition, yet in reality, you may find yourself unable to fully engage with and perceive certain aspects of life.

This may be due to an overreliance on cognitive processes at the expense of sensory perception.

Instead, most people are preoccupied with intellectual pursuits, which results in a disconnect from reality.

There is no absolute right or wrong in this state of mind, except that the current state may require minor adjustments.

You may develop the present situation in a direction that is more in line with your true inner needs. You have already recognized that this state of affairs represents a significant step forward, and you just need to gain a deeper understanding and implement improvements.

I am confident that you can overcome this challenge and flourish in alignment with your true self.

Regular exposure to natural elements such as sunlight and soil can stimulate and activate dormant awareness within the individual.

I would like to extend my sincerest blessings to you.

If you want answers, you have to be open-minded. You can't solve your doubts with just the word "open-minded." I'll tell you what I think next.

The phrase "neither festivals nor crowds can make my heart rise or fall" makes me feel that life is like the surface of a calm lake, without a ripple. But before you can throw a stone in to cause a ripple, you already know that there will be a ripple, and even the image of a ripple in your mind makes the ripple unruffled.

Similarly, we can see various landscapes around the city through our mobile phones, but when we actually go out and look, we know the real landscapes are not as good-looking as those captured in the photos. In such a situation, we will obviously feel unruffled.

Let's be clear: our own negative perceptions are hindering our exploration of the outside world and keeping us calm.

We can break such a perception. Using CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy), I can record the events we receive, our own feelings, and negative thinking. By recording, we can understand our current state and adjust our perception to get a way of thinking that allows us to feel the ups and downs.

For example:

I can't find the key.

I am feeling neutral.

Negative thinking: I can't find it, there's nothing I can do, I'll get the locksmith to change the lock.

Thought: It's probably hidden somewhere. I'll look for it, and if I can't find it, I'll think of something else.

My feelings are 40% curious and 60% indifferent.

I am confident that my answer will be helpful.

Hi, I'm Yiya Tree, and I'm here to help you tackle this issue.

From what I can see in the text, your energy level isn't great right now. You seem calm on the outside, but in reality, your emotions are depressed and suppressed. I'm not sure if you fully understand what it's like to be depressed. Depression isn't just a mood; it's an emotional state. When you're depressed, you lose all enthusiasm for life, you lose interest, and you lack motivation. You feel very low.

This is because in the past you've been too hard on yourself. You've been constantly suppressing your psychological need to relax and be free. You've been consuming yourself without realizing it and then stopping to rest. As a result, your subconscious mind couldn't bear to watch any more and depression set in to prevent you from continuing to drain yourself.

I hope you can take a look at what you've been doing recently. Have you been feeling exhausted without taking a break? Have you been trying to improve and advance too much, which has meant you haven't had a chance to relax?

What you need right now is rest. You can treat yourself and rest easy, doing the things you usually want to do but have been putting off, like sleeping, reading, or binge-watching TV.

If you're physically and mentally exhausted but unable to relax on your own, you can also find a therapist to help you out. Doing relaxation exercises with a pro can be really effective. I'd recommend meditation exercises. They're a great way to relax and heal depressive emotions, so you can give it a try.

You might also want to try using some essential oils and scented candles to help you relax more effectively.

When you give yourself a break, you'll feel more energized.

Once you've had a chance to recharge, you can think about the following questions:

What's been holding me back from relaxing lately? What's been draining my energy?

What state do I usually use when I'm dealing with these things? Do I face them by ignoring my own mental state and suppressing my emotions?

What's driving me to stay busy and push myself without taking a break?

What are my unmet needs, and are they important to me?

5. What changes should I make in the next period of time to prevent myself from being constantly overwhelmed by things and to better meet my own needs?

You can get a better handle on your state by using the above self-examination form. By looking at your past patterns of energy use, you can make some effective changes so that in the future you can reduce some of the experiences that drain you.

Naturally, this review should only be done when you're feeling a bit better. At the moment, your best bet is to relax, rest, and do something you enjoy.

Give yourself a reassuring hug. No matter how much pressure there is from the outside world, you need to take care of yourself.

My name is Gu Yi, and I am a modest and consistent individual.

Reading your words has left me with a profound sense of powerlessness.

At 28, we should be in the prime of life and in the prime of youth, full of curiosity and desire for everything, with energy and drive. However, your description does not reflect this. It is possible that you were very tired at the time you wrote about your mood.

If you are fatigued, allow yourself to pause and recuperate before embarking on the next task. It appears that we are perpetually in motion, yet we lack clarity regarding the starting point and the ultimate destination. This leads to a proliferation of doubts. Eventually, we recognize that this is a universal experience, and we are simply ordinary members. Everything is a result of people creating momentum. At this juncture, the seed of love within us has already dissipated.

I would then recommend that you make a list.

Please create a list of individuals you hold in high regard and those who may hold you in high regard. Include their names and consider ways you can demonstrate greater love and appreciation for them.

Create a list of accomplishments from your past and compare them to your current achievements.

Take the time to reflect on your personal goals and aspirations. Consider whether there are any activities or endeavors that would bring you a sense of fulfillment and self-worth. The concept of "sense of worth" is a crucial aspect to ponder.

I hope you can gain some self-awareness and resolve these issues. If you are open to new ideas, you will not have these doubts.

Best regards,

Good morning, I am Xin Tan, Coach Fei Yun. Thank you for sharing your story with me.

You experience a lack of emotional engagement and a sense of having lost your enthusiasm for life and your aspirations for the future. You are uncertain as to whether this is a positive or negative development, but you have lost your passion.

Let's take a moment to discuss the topic of happiness.

Firstly, it is important to understand the connection between happiness and motivation.

Despite the enviable lives of many well-known entrepreneurs and public success stories, many have experienced feelings of emptiness. Some have succumbed to temptation and fallen apart, while others have sought solace in spirituality, as evidenced by the number of entrepreneurs who have become monks or ended their lives in depression and loneliness.

Psychological research has revealed that there are typically two motivational drivers when we engage in an activity: the desire to pursue happiness and the need to avoid pain.

Furthermore, attempting to avoid pain can result in a significant drain on our resources, both physical and mental, over an extended period. Consequently, a focus on pursuing happiness can provide a more sustainable motivation.

Furthermore, avoiding pain is akin to being pursued by a tiger. Over time, it will deplete our energy and leave us physically and mentally exhausted. Consequently, a propensity towards happiness can provide greater motivation to take action.

There are two avenues for pursuing happiness: outwardly (seeking) and inwardly (cultivating).

There are two methods for pursuing happiness: the external, or seeking, approach and the internal, or cultivating, approach.

When an individual attains external material and other tangible things, they will experience a positive emotional state. Similarly, they will also feel gratified when they fulfill the spiritual needs of others, including recognition, affirmation, praise, acceptance, and love. These are all sources of motivation for an individual.

However, many of these external sources are beyond one's control. Just as we cannot change the way our parents or others perceive us, this outwardly seeking approach is akin to relinquishing control of one's life to external factors.

If the initiative is in someone else's hands and you are only under their control, how can you achieve a state of happiness?

The pursuit of fame and fortune, or the avoidance of pain, are the two common motivations for ordinary people to take action or refrain from taking action. Most people are driven to success by these two motivations. Unfortunately, human desires are endless, and fear is like an abyss without a bottom. No matter how hard you work and how much wealth you acquire, you will still not be satisfied, because you want to get even more.

Happiness is contingent upon one's inner motivation.

As the pessimist Arthur Schopenhauer once observed, "Life is a mass of desires. When desires are not satisfied, there is suffering; when they are satisfied, there is boredom. Life is either spent in suffering or wasted in boredom."

We will now examine the second method for achieving happiness: internal cultivation.

The second way to pursue happiness is through internal cultivation.

In order to achieve happiness, it is necessary to take control of one's own destiny. This can be achieved by turning one's attention from external sources of happiness to the inner self. There are many ways to cultivate the inner self, and I will share with you a simple method that anyone can do.

When an individual shifts their focus from external gains to inner development, they regain control of their initiative. There are numerous approaches to inner cultivation, and I will present a straightforward method that is accessible to all.

In Maslow's theory, this is self-actualization, which is also commonly referred to as the "mission" of life.

The term "mission" originally referred to the responsibility that individuals should assume when they complete a task. It is now used to describe the value of a person in the context of their professional activities.

The term "mission" originally referred to the responsibility that individuals should assume when they undertake a task, either initially or upon its completion. It generally denotes the value of an individual in the context of their professional role.

In the modern era, the concept of a mission has expanded to encompass a broader scope. When an individual is able to create value for society and others, and experiences a sense of purpose and fulfillment as a result, that can be considered a mission.

Many great historical figures have achieved success under the driving force of such a mission. For example, South African President Mandela, who worked for the elimination of apartheid his entire life, said, "When I walked out of prison, liberating the oppressed became my mission."

One method of developing your mission and values is to focus on introspection. This process can be both empowering and rewarding.

What steps can be taken to identify one's own distinctive mission?

(1) First, it is essential to maintain awareness. It would be beneficial to inquire whether you are deriving enjoyment from your learning, work, life, or emotions.

If the answer is negative, it indicates that your motivation is driven by external factors, such as pursuing desires or escaping pain.

(2) Shift from seeking outwardly to cultivating inwardly. Many individuals are accustomed to satisfying their desires by pursuing material things, money, power, and reputation externally, or by avoiding their inner fears.

Please take a moment to pause and reflect on your desires and inner fears. You may find it helpful to engage in meditation, sitting in silence, or Zen meditation.

3) Psychotherapy can facilitate healing. Frequently, fears are not genuine. The deficit resulting from the trauma experienced during the growth process is precisely what leads to greed.

To satisfy these desires, one must exert significant effort to obtain external resources. This is an internal obsession that can be overcome to achieve a state of freedom.

Observation can facilitate change, and observation provides the foundation for informed decision-making. Admitting is the first step in the growth process.

Observation can facilitate change, and observation provides the foundation for informed decision-making. Admitting is the first step in the growth process.

I hope the above is helpful to you, and I wish you well.

I hope the above is helpful to you. Best regards, [Your name]

Should you wish to continue the communication, please click on the "Find a Coach" link, which can be found in the top right-hand corner or at the bottom of the page. I will communicate and grow with you on a one-to-one basis.