The child is depressed at home, complaining about why she was born to suffer. How do you respond?

Hello, question asker! I'm Jiang 61, and I'm here to help.

Thank you so much for reaching out to us with your question. We're here to help! It's so great that you're willing to share your confusion with us so that we can help you find answers. We're ready to hear from you! You've asked, "My child is depressed at home, complaining about why she was born to suffer, how do I respond?"

"After reading your brief introduction, I understand the confusion you are experiencing. Let's discuss it together, my friend."

1. Introduction

1️⃣, Complaining

You said, "My child is depressed at home, complaining that she has nothing, that she is not pretty, that she doesn't have a perfect appearance, that there is no endless money at home, no clever mind, and no friends. Why did you bring her into this world, when some people are born with everything?"

I can see you're struggling with your child's depression. It's so hard when our kids are unwell, isn't it? I'm here to listen and help in any way I can. You said, "My child is depressed at home, complaining that she has nothing, that she is not pretty, that she doesn't have a perfect appearance, that there is no endless money at home, no clever mind, and no friends. Why did you bring her into this world, when some people are born with everything?" It's so sad when our kids feel like this. I'm wondering if there's something going on at home that's causing this?

It's so sad to see a child feeling depressed at home, complaining that they have nothing and feel very inferior. It really makes you wonder what might have caused this poor child to lose their self-confidence and only see problems.

I have a question for you.

The child's question is a great one. She's asking a lot of questions! It makes me wonder, why did you bring her into this world? Why wasn't she born with everything just like everyone else?

2. Opinion

You said, "In fact, she is at least above average in our eyes, and our family's conditions are above average in our area. She might not be listening to what we say, and it's okay if she doesn't think she can change anything through hard work."

Perception

From what the questioner said, it seems like she's not totally happy with her child's appearance or her family's situation. It's understandable! In our minds, we see ourselves as middle to upper class.

It can be tough to persuade others, can't it?

It can be tough to convince others of something we're not totally confident in ourselves. This is the situation my daughter is currently in. She sees everything about herself as a problem, so it's hard for her to believe that she can change everything through hard work.

3️⃣. No response

You said, "I'm not sure how to respond to her."

From what the questioner said, it seems like she understands what her daughter is saying. But it's not easy to come up with the right words to help our daughter see that everything in life is changeable.

2. Let's figure out why this is happening

1️⃣, Relationship with self

Let's talk about your relationship with yourself.

When we're talking about our relationship with ourselves, we're really talking about our understanding and acceptance of our identity, value, abilities, and emotional state. This relationship is the core and foundation of all other interpersonal relationships, and it determines how we perceive ourselves, how we interact with others, and how we deal with the external world.

It involves several aspects, including self-identity, love and dependence, emotional transference, inner peace and love, and self-realization.

? Problems

From what the original poster said, it seems like your daughter might be having a bit of trouble with her self-perception. It's totally normal for kids to have ups and downs, but it sounds like she might be having a rough time seeing her own strengths and abilities right now.

This can then affect her emotions and relationships with others.

2️⃣, Family Education and Living Environment

The original family

The original family is the one you were born and raised in. It's so important to understand how the atmosphere, traditions, and customs of this family affect you. The role models for children in the family and the interactions between family members all play a part in how children will behave in their new family in the future.

The impact of education and life experiences

It's possible that the questioner isn't aware that the reason the child only sees their own problems is related to our usual family education and interactions.

I think it's fair to say that the questioner usually pays more attention to the child's shortcomings and makes more negative comments, which can lead the child to perceive themselves as average in terms of appearance and grades. We rarely encourage children to pay more attention to their strengths and areas of excellence, which can result in a lack of self-confidence.

Oh, poor thing! Why on earth did you bring me into this world to suffer?

3️⃣, Comparison psychology

Let's talk about comparison psychology!

The psychology of comparison is something we all do from time to time. It's our natural tendency to compare our own advantages, disadvantages, achievements, status, and so on with others. We do this to evaluate ourselves and figure out where we stand in the world.

This psychological phenomenon isn't just about comparing ourselves to other people. It also includes comparing ourselves to who we used to be and who we want to be in the future.

It affects

It's so common for both the questioner and her daughter to compare themselves with others. We often compare our shortcomings and the challenges of our family with the strengths of others and their privileged backgrounds, which can lead to negative emotions and a strong sense of inferiority. This can make it difficult for the questioner to deal with some of her child's problems.

3. What to do

A child's lack of self-awareness can cause some pretty big problems, as we can see from the original question. So, when we're responding to her, it's really important to recognize and accept her, affirm her strengths, and show her her own advantages.

And help her to start by understanding herself, building self-confidence, improving self-awareness, and establishing a harmonious relationship with herself. In this way, she can gradually change her self-perception and establish a good relationship with others. Here are some specific methods:

1️⃣, Understand yourself

It's so important to understand yourself!

Knowing yourself is all about having a deep and thorough understanding of who you are. This includes your character, interests, strengths and weaknesses, areas of expertise, abilities, and even your thoughts, language, and behavioral habits.

It's so important to build self-confidence!

We love and support our kids, cheering them on as they discover their strengths, explore their talents, and build their confidence. We encourage them to choose projects that make use of their unique skills and abilities, and to share their gifts with the world.

2️⃣, improve self-awareness

Self-awareness is so important!

Self-awareness, also known as self-knowledge or self, is a pretty complex psychological phenomenon with lots of different dimensions and levels. It's made up of three different psychological components: self-knowledge, self-experience, and self-control. These three components are all connected and work together to form a unified sense of self-awareness in each of us.

Let's work together to improve your self-awareness!

We start by helping children enhance their self-awareness, improve their self-perception, self-observation, self-analysis, and self-criticism.

In terms of self-experience, we can really enhance our self-experience by increasing self-awareness, self-love, self-esteem, self-care, self-deprecation, a sense of responsibility, a sense of duty, and a sense of superiority.

In terms of self-control, we work on strengthening our awareness of independence, autonomy, self-control, self-improvement, self-defense, self-discipline, and so on. This helps us improve our ability to control ourselves.

When we become more aware of ourselves, we can see our own strengths, embrace them, build self-confidence, and motivate ourselves, control ourselves, find the best version of ourselves, and make even greater progress.

3️⃣, Nurture a loving relationship with yourself.

Self-identity is so important! It's the foundation of a friendly relationship with yourself. When you understand and trust your identity, value, and abilities, you can build a great relationship with yourself.

Self-identity is the foundation of a friendly relationship with ourselves. It's all about understanding and trusting our identity, value, and abilities.

It's so important to establish a harmonious relationship with yourself!

We tell our daughter that the first step to building a happy, healthy relationship with herself is to love herself just as she is, to recognize her own strengths and weaknesses, and to develop a close, supportive relationship with herself. This is the foundation for all other relationships.

It doesn't matter how she gets along with her classmates, family, and friends. What matters most is that she has a good relationship with herself. When we have a good relationship with ourselves, we can eliminate various emotions such as anxiety and inferiority.

And it'll help you feel more relaxed about other problems, too!

And the same goes for the questioner! While helping her daughter, she is also re-acquainting herself and building a relationship with her child. We inspire our children, and we inspire ourselves to progress and grow!

It's so wonderful when we can help our children progress by growing ourselves. It's a wonderful, mutually reinforcing process of growing together!

I really hope the poster and her child make great progress together!

Hello, I'm Xintan Coach Feixiang. Life is a beautiful journey, not just for appreciation, but for blossoming.

You feel your child's worries and love, but you're unsure how to respond to her "negative energy," fearing that your reaction will cause further harm to your sensitive, depressed child. Let's take a closer look at the situation:

1. Children

If you tell your child she's depressed at home, she'll feel low. If she has nothing to do, she'll feel even more empty. People in a depressed state have a very low sense of self-worth, low self-esteem, and obvious negative emotions.

The child's never-ending gripes about her looks, intelligence, social life, and money situation are not her genuine feelings. They're also negative emotions that can't be released.

It's better to vent and express your feelings than to stay silent and shut yourself in, isn't it?

It's been observed that in people with depression, there's a harsh inner critic who's always watching what they say and do. When they make a mistake, this critic will harshly judge and condemn them. This can lead to self-blame, low energy, and a negative view of themselves, which can trigger depression. - "Surviving: Notes on Healing Depression"

So, leave the professional stuff to the professionals and get some help from a counselor to help your child.

2. Parents

First, don't be afraid to tackle it head-on. You'll want to be extra careful and accommodating with your child because you're unsure of how to respond, and your child will pick up on that. The best way to handle it is to do your best and respond and care for your child with love. Don't carry too much psychological burden, and don't blame yourself.

Be understanding, listen, and care for your child. Let her express her negative emotions. Only when they are expressed will parents know her true feelings and be able to respond better and offer help. At the same time, catharsis is also a way to vent and has a healing effect.

Help your child to "see" what they have. She complains because her negative emotions make her focus on what she doesn't have. And we only have so much energy. When you are more grateful, you will complain less.

It all comes down to where you focus. If you focus on what you've achieved, you'll be grateful. If you focus on what you haven't achieved, you'll complain a lot.

In particular, there should be no accusations, criticism, or negation. The child is showing a low sense of self-worth and especially needs encouragement from the outside world to boost her self-confidence. Affirming words from parents and quality companionship can help her find a sense of worth, security, and achievement, which are exactly the forces that make up life.

Parents should be there for their kids during these tough times with love and patience. Everything will be okay. I'd also suggest watching the movie "The Child in the Mind." And parents should make sure they're taking care of their own emotional needs.

I hope this was helpful for you. Best regards, The World and I

If you'd like to continue the conversation, you can follow my personal page, "Heart Exploration Service."

How are you?

Parents of depressed children probably feel a lot of anxiety, pain, worry, and pressure. They may also feel angry.

As parents, you probably have a lot to deal with.

Depression is harder on kids. They can't go to school, lose friends, and feel ashamed and powerless.

Children also suffer from depression, which makes things twice as hard for them.

When we're sick, we need to relax and rest. We can also understand and help with symptoms like vomiting, headaches, and dizziness.

People with mental illness have to endure pain and may display symptoms like aggression, anger, powerlessness, radicalization, or self-harm.

Dealing with mental illness is harder than dealing with physical illness because the other person's symptoms can shock us.

It makes us lose our calm.

Your child may have extreme thoughts, make unreal statements, and get angry. You may not know how to respond.

I also recommend the book Teen Depression. It records the experiences of children and families who have depression. I hope it will help you.

I'm therapist Xu Yanlian. Welcome to chat.

Best wishes!

Hello, I'm Strawberry.

It is possible that some children may still experience depression even when their parents pay attention to them and respond to them in a timely manner. This is not necessarily a reflection of the parents' lack of care, but rather a consequence of the children's exposure to external influences and the development of a competitive mentality in their interactions with others.

It would be helpful to try to understand the true thoughts behind the complaining behavior.

The child in the questioner's family is currently experiencing some challenges at home, and his words and actions reflect a tendency to express negative sentiments. His mentality seems to be more negative than positive. The child has expressed feelings of inadequacy, concerns about his appearance, doubts about his intelligence, a lack of social support, and financial constraints within the family. It's important to recognize that everyone is born with unique strengths and abilities, and it's essential to provide a nurturing and supportive environment for the child to flourish.

The questioner listens to her child express dissatisfaction with various aspects of their lives. While the child's perception of their situation may be negative, the questioner believes that their reality is not as dire as they portray it to be. The questioner acknowledges that their child's appearance may not be particularly outstanding, but believes that they are above average. Regarding academic expectations, the questioner has not placed excessive pressure on their child and has not set their expectations too high.

The child complains that the family does not have endless money. On this point, the questioner believes that although the family is not particularly wealthy in the area, it is considered a well-off family and there is no need to worry about food, clothing, or shelter. However, in the face of her daughter's complaints, the questioner has tried to guide the child on how to view material and economic issues, but found that the child simply does not listen to what she says. The child in the questioner's family does not think that she has the ability to change in the face of these complaints.

How might one gently guide a child out of a depressed mood?

People can learn, improve, and grow from comparison. However, excessive comparison can sometimes turn into competition, which can negatively impact a child's values and perceptions.

It would be beneficial to learn to listen. The child in the questioner's family is currently experiencing a negative and passive state of mind. The questioner is encouraging and guiding the child, but it seems that the child is not yet ready to listen or to return to a positive state of mind. In this situation, it would be helpful to learn to be a good listener to your child, in order to understand why the child has such negative thoughts and denies himself based on what the child tells you.

It is commonly believed that bullying is a harmful behavior. However, it is often overlooked that verbal bullying, such as putting down and insulting, also falls under this umbrella. This form of bullying can cause significant psychological harm, which is just as damaging as physical harm.

It would seem that the child in the original poster has rejected himself and fallen into depression. If the family members have never suppressed the child's behavior, it may be worth considering that this has a lot to do with the people the child usually comes into contact with elsewhere.

It might be helpful for the questioner to let the child know that parents are people that children can rely on and trust. This could help the child to feel at ease talking about it and understand who or what is causing it. It may also help to identify whether the child is too concerned about what others think and say about them.

External attribution: From the words of the questioner, it seems that in the process of denying themselves, the children in the questioner's family may be more inclined to complain than to truly feel inferior and become consumed by internal conflict. This could be a form of competitive mentality, which may also be influenced by the suppression and criticism of others.

It might be helpful to teach our children "external attribution," sending them positive signals. For example, just because someone says something negative about you, it doesn't necessarily mean you are as bad as they say. This is because everyone has different aesthetics and focuses, and what the other person expresses can only represent themselves.

It would be beneficial to set a good example. It's possible that worrying about what others think of you is partly due to a lack of confidence in oneself and partly due to peer pressure. In the same age group and same environment, many aspects may seem inferior to others. It's understandable that you're constantly comparing yourself, which could lead to a lack of confidence in oneself and the development of self-denial.

It seems that the child in the original poster is trying to extricate himself from the depressive emotions caused by the negativity, and is perhaps unwilling to admit that it is all his own problem. As a result, he is pushing more of the blame and responsibility onto his parents, which could be seen as a way of avoiding taking responsibility for his own actions.

If the questioner has tried guiding the child but the child is reluctant to listen, it might be helpful to consider leading the child by example. This could help the child to gradually regain confidence and strengthen themselves, and may also assist them in avoiding internal conflict due to other people's opinions or their own comparisons.

It would be beneficial for parents who wish to alter their children's negative outlook to maintain a calm and composed demeanor, ensuring that their children are not unduly influenced by their anxieties. By embracing positivity and optimism, parents can foster a similar outlook in their children, encouraging them to embrace contentment and recognize the beauty and joy in their lives. It's important to understand that this transformation may require time and patience, and parents should be prepared to provide guidance and support as their children grow and develop.

I hope my answer is helpful to the questioner. Best wishes,

Hello, dear questioner! I'm Jia Ao, your Heart Exploration coach. I'm here to help in any way I can.

After reading your post, I could tell you're going through a rough patch. It seems like your daughter has been feeling down lately. She's been in a bad mood, and it seems like she's struggling with some negative emotions. She's been complaining that she has nothing, that she's not pretty, and that she doesn't have a perfect appearance. She's also feeling like there's no money, no clever minds, and no friends at home. I can understand why you're asking these questions. It's natural to wonder why some people are born into a world of abundance while others are not. It's tough to see your child struggling, and it's hard to know how to comfort her and help her through this.

It's true that she's at least above average in appearance in your parents' eyes, and her family's conditions are above average in the area. It's so hard for her to listen to advice, and she doesn't think she can change anything through hard work. I really don't know how to respond to her, but I still need to find out what problem she is facing first. Did someone say something?

Or maybe something bad happened? It's probably best to wait until you understand the situation before trying to guide your child.

I'm here to help you analyze and sort things out.

1. Learn to listen and understand.

When this problem arises, as a parent, it's so important to listen to your child's true thoughts and feelings, ask about their real needs and expectations, pay attention to your own communication and expression, and avoid arousing your child's negative emotions. Let your child feel understood and supported, for example, "What's wrong with you lately? Have you encountered something unhappy?

"Hey, let's talk about this," or "Do you see what I mean? You are saying..." Expressing your concern and understanding in this way is more helpful than criticism and blame.

2. It's also a good idea to set some clear boundaries and distances.

As we all know, getting along with children isn't always easy. But it's so important to try! It's possible to set some clear boundaries and distances, and even parents must abide by them and not break them easily. These boundaries or principles allow children to understand which behaviors are acceptable and which are not. If problems arise, they must promptly explain the situation to their parents. If there are problems that parents cannot solve, they must find a way to seek help from outside. Parents need to clearly express their love and care for their children's safety.

3. Give your child the love and support they need!

No matter what happens, be there for your child and give them all the love and support they need. It's totally normal for kids to feel down when they're feeling depressed. Let them know you're there for them and that you'll always be their biggest cheerleader. Give them a hug or a pat when they're feeling sad to let them know you're there for them and that you'll help them feel better.

4. Take a deep breath and explore the root cause behind the problem together.

If it's not just a bad mood, it's important to figure out why your child is struggling. Depression can have a lot of underlying causes, so it's essential to get to the heart of the matter. I'd suggest going to the school to learn more about what's going on. That way, you can address the issue in a targeted way. It's also important for parents to adjust their attitude and behavior when needed. When you realize you're not doing as well as you could be in a particular area, it's time to reflect and make adjustments. This will help you support your child in getting out of the emotional whirlpool as soon as possible. Don't worry too much. You're doing a great job!

I really hope my answer helps! If you need to chat some more, you can follow me (just click on my profile page) and choose the Heart Exploration service to send me a private message. Sending you lots of love and hugs!

Hello, and thank you for your question.

I can see how anxious and helpless you must feel right now. As a parent, seeing your child fall into depression and feel hopeless about life must be an awful experience for you.

You want your child to live a happy and confident life, but it can feel like you're at a loss.

I get it. You might be wondering if you've done enough to raise your child right. Have you given them enough love and support?

This self-doubt makes you feel even more miserable and lost. But please believe that you've already done your best as a parent.

Every child has their own growth trajectory. Sometimes, they need to explore and experience on their own to find their own direction and value.

You might feel like you don't know what to say when your child is complaining or seems helpless. You want to find the right words to comfort your child and help them regain their confidence and courage.

But remember, sometimes just listening and understanding can give your child more strength than words. Being there for them and showing them you support and understand them is probably what they need most right now.

I get it. You're worried that your child's depressed mood will stick around and affect their future.

But please believe that as long as you give your child enough love and support, they will be able to come out of the darkness and embrace the sunshine. This process may be long and challenging, but please remain patient and confident, and be there for your child through this difficult time.

As a parent, you want to give your child the best of everything, both materially and emotionally. But sometimes, no matter how hard you try, your child doesn't seem to appreciate it and may even develop a resistance towards you.

It's natural to feel frustrated and disappointed, but it's important to remember that it's not your fault. Every child has their own thoughts and feelings, and they need time to grow and understand.

It's also important to take care of yourself emotionally and in your personal life. Don't let your child's problems take over your life, and make sure you're looking after your own needs and feelings.

When you're feeling tired or anxious, try to relax. Go for a walk, read, or meet up with friends. These activities will help you adjust your emotions and be in a better state to face your child's problems.

I just want to say that you're doing a great job as a parent. Raising a child is a complex process that requires time and patience.

Have faith in your child and in yourself. No matter what difficulties or challenges you may face in the future, stay confident and courageous.

You're not alone in this. We're here for you as fellow parents. Let's work together to give our kids more love and care as they grow up and shape their future.

I also suggest you look into professional psychological counseling or family therapy. A professional counselor or therapist can give you more targeted advice and support to help you cope better with your child's problems and your own emotional distress.

Remember, asking for help is not a sign of weakness. It's a way to take better care of yourself and your family.

My dear colleague, we understand how you feel. Please know that you are not alone, no matter when or where.

We'll always be there for you, giving you a boost when you need it. I hope you and your child will be able to get through this tough time and look forward to a bright future.

If you're looking for some guidance on how to respond to your child in this situation, here are a few ideas to consider.

My dear child, I can see you're hurting and feeling helpless. You feel like you were born into this world to suffer, like you have nothing—not the right looks, not the perfect body; your family doesn't have endless money, you don't have a gifted mind, and you even feel like you don't have any friends.

I get it. I really do. And I'm here for you through this tough time.

First of all, I want to tell you that beauty is not only reflected in appearance. Everyone has their own unique beauty, and this beauty is not limited to appearance.

You might not be considered traditionally beautiful, but you have your own unique charm and temperament. Your smile, your kindness, and your talents are all important elements that make up your unique beauty.

Also, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Everyone has their own idea of what's beautiful. So, don't be too hard on yourself when it comes to your appearance. Believe in your uniqueness and be confident in who you are.

Money and wealth are important, but they're not the only measure of a person's value. Our family's not the wealthiest in the area, but we have a warm family, mutual support, and love.

These things can't be measured in money. Plus, wealth isn't static; it can be created and accumulated through our efforts.

So, don't let the current economic situation make you doubt your own value. Believe in your potential and abilities, and go after your dreams and goals.

You said you don't think you're particularly clever, but remember that wisdom isn't just about academic performance or IQ. We all have our own strengths and weaknesses, and wisdom is a broad concept.

You might not be as good as others in some areas, but you have unique talents and abilities in others. So don't be too demanding on your intelligence, but discover your strengths and specialties, and show your wisdom and talent in your own way.

As for friends, I know you may feel lonely and helpless right now. But remember that true friends are there for you when you need them, offering support and companionship.

It's not about the quantity of friends you have, it's about the quality. If you open your heart and actively seek out like-minded people, I'm sure you'll find friends who truly understand and support you.

Life can be challenging and difficult at times, but these experiences are necessary for growth. The difficulties and suffering you are facing now are temporary.

If you're ready to face the situation head-on and move forward with courage, you can overcome the difficulties and embrace a better future.

You've got our support every step of the way. As your family, we're here for you, ready to give you a helping hand when you need it.

No matter what difficulties and challenges you encounter, please know that we are always here for you and rooting for you. At the same time, I also hope that you can learn to find strength within yourself and believe in your own abilities and value.

Everyone has their own rhythm and pace, so try not to be too impatient or anxious. As long as you stick to your own path and pursue your dreams and goals, you'll be able to realize your own value.

I also want to remind you not to dwell on your negative emotions too much. When you feel frustrated or lost, try to distract yourself by doing something you enjoy.

For instance, activities like drawing, listening to music, or reading can help you relax and relieve stress while also helping you discover your interests and passions.

You might also want to talk to us or your friends about how you're feeling. Sometimes it can help to talk through things with someone else.

Finally, I want to say: my child, please value your life and what you do with it. Everyone is different, with their own purpose and worth.

Your existence is a miracle and a gift. Please cherish it and make the most of it. No matter what difficulties and challenges you may face in the future, stay confident and courageous. Believe that you can overcome all obstacles and achieve your dreams and goals.

We're here to remind you that you're not alone, even when things get tough. We've got your back, cheering you on, and offering support when you need it.

As long as you're ready to face life head-on and go after your dreams and goals, you'll be able to create a great life for yourself. No matter what, believe in yourself, the future, and hope.

Good day. I am Qu Huidong, a psychological counselor who employs visual imagery as a therapeutic tool.

The questioner discovered that she was unable to communicate effectively with her depressed daughter. Confronted with her own feelings of self-doubt, the questioner was motivated to provide her daughter with guidance and reassurance. However, her efforts were unsuccessful, and her daughter remained unresponsive.

Indeed, there is a problem with communication. When parents express anxiety about their inability to keep pace with their daughter's verbalizations and assert that she is unresponsive to their persuasive efforts, it is crucial to assess whether they are truly attuned to her innermost needs and concerns.

When parents attempt to provide comfort and persuade, they are still refuting her perspective. Both parties are positioned on opposing sides, attempting to substantiate their own interpretations as truth, which hinders effective communication.

Naturally, it is instinctive to seek self-preservation. However, it is crucial to comprehend that the daughter will only be deemed suitable to remain at home when she acknowledges her shortcomings.

Furthermore, the fact that she is able to return to her home despite her depressive state indicates that she still has trust in her family and believes that they will provide her with protection and support.

At this juncture, it is imperative to establish a connection with a depressed daughter through the means of acceptance, unconditional love, and the establishment of boundaries. The following methods may be employed to achieve this end:

It is essential to listen attentively to the other person's thoughts and feelings, as well as to comprehend their needs and expectations. Only through such active listening can we truly grasp the depth of our understanding of each other and, consequently, the extent of our capacity to love.

It is advisable to refrain from immediately refuting the proposition; instead, it would be more prudent to inquire as to whether that is indeed the case, or whether there are alternative explanations.

An alternative approach is to use the phrase "Do you see if I understand it correctly, you are saying..." to indicate that you are listening and that you want to hear.

It is essential to establish clear boundaries in the context of a loving relationship. These boundaries can be defined as rules or principles that delineate the behaviors that are acceptable and those that are not.

For example, individuals experiencing depressive episodes often engage in self-harm. It is imperative to ensure their safety and to communicate clearly that it is distressing to witness self-harm and that, should they wish to engage in it, they may do so while we observe and provide companionship.

It is imperative to provide sufficient support and encouragement to one's partner when they require it. It is crucial to convey to them that they are not alone and that one will be present to assist them through challenging periods.

It is imperative that we respect each other's independence and individuality. Attempting to alter the other person or exert control over their actions and thoughts is unacceptable.

It can be argued that respect is a prerequisite for the establishment of genuine trust and respect.

It is essential to adjust one's attitude in a timely manner. During the process of loving, it is crucial to modify one's attitudes and behaviors as needed. When difficulties arise, it is vital to reflect on and address these issues promptly.

It appears that my daughter exhibits certain cognitive biases, and attempting to force her to correct them may potentially lead to a further distancing of her from me. As a parent, I believe that leading by example can effectively demonstrate the appropriate values and behaviors.

By means of verbal and non-verbal communication, it is possible to convey to one's daughter what is right and what is worth pursuing. This will have the effect of influencing her in an imperceptible manner, and thus enabling her cognitive bias to be corrected gradually.

In conclusion, maintaining a balance between unconditional love and love with boundaries necessitates continued exploration and adaptation in practice. As long as there is an effort to comprehend and care for one another, it is likely that an optimal equilibrium can be achieved, which will consequently enhance communication.

I wish you the best of success!

Dear Landlord, I have read your description and can understand your current feelings. I hope my suggestions will be of assistance to you. When faced with your child's depression and self-negativity, it is important to demonstrate patience and employ an appropriate approach.

The following suggestions are offered to assist parents and their children in coping with this situation.

1. Understanding and Empathy

1. Attend to her emotional state: Initially, it is crucial to listen to her feelings without hastily refuting or lecturing her. It is essential to convey genuine care and concern for her emotional well-being, rather than merely perceiving her expressions of distress as mere complaints.

2. Demonstrate empathy for her confusion: Attempt to comprehend her confusion and distress, and convey that you grasp the underlying reasons for her emotional state. For instance, you might say, "I comprehend that you currently feel inadequate and lack sources of pride."

2. Provide guidance on positive thinking.

1. Affirm her strengths: When the time is appropriate, gently direct her attention to her own strengths and positive attributes. One approach is to begin with a topic she is interested in, which can facilitate her discovery of her abilities and potential in specific areas.

2. Set Small Goals: Assist the child in setting incremental objectives and provide encouragement as she works to achieve these goals. By meeting these goals, she will gradually develop a sense of self-efficacy and accomplishment.

3. Provide support and encouragement.

1. Create a positive environment: It is recommended that a positive and supportive family environment be created in order to reduce the impact of negative emotions. One possible method of doing so is to arrange more family activities, which may increase the sense of participation and belonging that the child feels.

2. It is advisable to seek the assistance of a qualified professional, such as a counselor or psychotherapist, if your child's depressive mood persists. These professionals can provide guidance and support to help your child cope with emotional problems more effectively.

4. Guide Self-Identification

1. Assist her in identifying and pursuing leisure activities: Promote the exploration and cultivation of her own interests, thereby fostering self-confidence and a sense of self-identity.

2. Guide her to accept herself: Assist her in comprehending and accepting her distinctiveness, emphasizing that all individuals possess their own strengths and weaknesses, and that the concept of absolute perfection is unattainable. You may illustrate this concept for her through the use of motivational literature or films that illustrate the growth and challenges faced by numerous individuals.

5. Facing Reality and Working Hard

1. Educate her about reality: It is important to gently inform her that no individual in reality has an effortless life, and that everyone must confront challenges and difficulties. Through diligence and perseverance, one can alter one's present circumstances and future prospects.

2. It is important to emphasise the process rather than the result. This entails guiding the child to focus on the process of effort rather than the result, and helping them to understand that growth and learning in the process is what matters most.

6. Parents' Own Adjustments

1. Remain Calm and Patient: It is imperative that parents maintain composure and patience when confronted with their child's negative emotions, as their emotional stability exerts a profound influence on their offspring.

2. Self-care: Parents must also prioritize their own emotional and psychological well-being, maintaining a positive outlook and a healthy lifestyle to better support their children.

In the event that a child is experiencing depression or self-doubt, it is imperative that the parents demonstrate understanding, support, and provide accurate guidance. By employing empathy, positive guidance, support, and seeking professional assistance, children can gradually overcome negative emotions and enhance self-confidence and self-identity.

It is my hope that these suggestions will prove beneficial. I am optimistic that a solution to the problem will be found in the near future, allowing both you and your child to navigate this challenging period together. I am confident that with your guidance and support, your child will gradually regain confidence and a positive outlook.

When your child is depressed and complaining, you can respond and help in the following ways:

1. Listen and understand. First, listen patiently to her complaints and don't rush to deny her feelings. Let her know that you understand how she feels and that you're willing to face it together with her.

2. Affirm and encourage. Tell her that everyone has their own unique value and beauty. Appearance is not the only criterion for measuring a person's value. She has merits and potential.

3. **Provide support**: Let her know that she can count on the family for support and that no matter what difficulties she encounters, the family will be there for her and help her.

4. Guided thinking: Make sure she considers the good things in life, such as family love, the support of friends, personal interests and hobbies, etc.

5. Seek professional help immediately if the situation is serious. Professionals can provide more effective guidance and treatment.

6. **Joint activities**: Take part in activities with your child. Go for a walk, watch a movie, or do arts and crafts together. This will strengthen the parent-child relationship and make your child feel the warmth of the family.

7. Educate and guide. Make sure she understands that the value of life is not determined by material conditions, but through personal effort and growth. Help her establish correct values.

8. Set goals: Help her set some short-term and long-term goals, and make sure she works hard to achieve them.

9. Set an example. As a parent, you must demonstrate a positive attitude towards life and the ability to solve problems. Be a role model for your child.

10. Keep the communication going. Your child needs to know she can share her feelings and thoughts with you whenever and wherever she wants.

Depression is a serious emotional disorder that requires time and patience to deal with. As a parent, you must be there for your child and support them unconditionally.

It is also crucial to seek professional help.

Hello, After listening to your child's complaints, I feel that the main problem is low self-esteem. Adler believed that everyone has a different degree of low self-esteem because we all feel that our position could be improved.

If we keep our courage up, we can make improvements in a straightforward, effective, and ideal way, and free ourselves from the feeling of inferiority.

It's not easy to live with low self-esteem for long, so people will do whatever they can to relieve their tension. If they're still disheartened after trying and think that they can't change their situation with their current efforts, they'll either indulge in a sense of superiority or numb themselves.

Meanwhile, his inferiority complex will build up, and every step he takes will gradually lead him into deeper self-deception, while various problems will also put increasing pressure on him.

Low self-esteem happens when someone is faced with a situation that they can't handle and they show that they think they can't solve the problem. Old situations can make someone feel low about themselves and keep them down mentally.

Anger, like tears, can be a sign of inferiority complexes, and a sense of superiority doesn't solve real problems. People are always trying to avoid failure rather than pursue success.

In real life, there are lots of people who try to seem superior in the wrong ways and end up making themselves feel more inferior. For example, some people show off their wealth a lot and constantly attack me, saying that I am not as good as their daughter's boss. They always use the wrong methods to seem superior, so that the harder they try to seem superior, the more inferior they feel.

I'll also share some tips on how to help your child overcome their inferiority complex.

?1. Try to understand and empathize with your child more.

It's been shown that feeling the pain of others has a healing and calming effect. Regular communication with your child and showing understanding for his thoughts can go a long way towards relieving his pain.

First, treat your child kindly, with tolerance and understanding of their shortcomings and flaws. Second, understand your child's vulnerability. Nobody's perfect, and we all make mistakes. This is normal, so don't be too critical of your child's mistakes. Third, view your child's current life objectively and in a balanced way, neither ignoring your child nor dwelling on the negative aspects of their life.

? Secondly, you need to learn to identify your child's strengths.

It's important to pay attention to the little things your child does well and give him more praise. This will help him build confidence.

?③Avoid "depleting" relationships with children.

If a child lives in a family where there's a lot of criticism and little encouragement and affirmation from their parents, they'll likely develop a low opinion of themselves, which can lead to low self-esteem. If you notice these issues in your own parenting, it's important to address them promptly.

Wishing you the best!

Good morning,

I can sense your frustration and concern regarding your child's struggles with self-confidence and depression. I want to extend a supportive gesture and offer some suggestions that I hope will be helpful.

First and foremost, it is crucial for us to remain calm and take a step back to gain a better understanding of what might have led to this perception in our child. It is important to recognize that excessive anxiety may not be the most helpful approach and could potentially have a negative impact on the child.

Secondly, it may be helpful to listen to your child's heart and try to understand the underlying reasons.

There are many potential reasons why children may express frustration, lack confidence, or experience depression. By communicating with the child, we can gain insight into the underlying psychological factors and identify the most pressing issue.

1. Cognitive bias: It is possible that the child may have fallen into a one-sided and negative cognitive pattern, which could result in an exaggeration of what they don't have and a lack of acknowledgment of the advantages and resources they already possess. This could lead to a more extreme view of things.

2. Social comparison pressure: In today's society, which is flooded with all kinds of information, children may unconsciously compare themselves with others, especially when they see people who appear to have a glamorous life, which can potentially lead to a strong sense of disparity and inferiority.

3. Adolescent sensitivity: Children in adolescence experience a greater range of emotions, explore themselves and the world in greater depth, and may be more susceptible to external influences that can lead to feelings of self-doubt and self-negation.

4. A lack of a sense of accomplishment: It's possible that she hasn't had many experiences in the past where she's felt successful through hard work, which might have led to a lack of confidence in her abilities and a feeling that hard work can't change things.

5. It is also possible that she has experienced some setbacks or unpleasant things in the past, which may have had an impact on her state of mind.

6. Environmental influence: It is possible that if the surrounding environment places too much emphasis on external factors such as material things and appearance, it may also cause the child to develop such a perception.

7. Personality factors: Some children are naturally more sensitive and introverted, which can make them more prone to negative emotions and thoughts.

As parents, we can also take some positive measures to help our children get out of trouble. This can be done in the following ways:

1. Guide positive thinking: In daily communication, it may be helpful to gently encourage her to recognize her own advantages, progress, and the beauty in life, with the aim of gradually cultivating a positive way of thinking.

2. Share your own experiences: You might consider telling her about how you faced and overcame difficulties and setbacks in the past. This could help her understand the meaning and value of hard work.

3. Set small goals: It might be helpful to work with her to set some small, practical goals that she can achieve, which could help to boost her confidence.

4. Encourage socializing: It might be helpful to encourage her to join some interest groups or activities, and perhaps start with a smaller social circle to slowly make friends.

5. Seek professional help: You might consider taking your child to see a professional psychologist or counselor, who could use professional methods to intervene more effectively.

6. Develop hobbies: It might be helpful to help her find something she loves, as getting involved in it could potentially divert attention and enhance a sense of self-worth.

7. Role model: It would be beneficial for parents to demonstrate a positive and hardworking attitude themselves and serve as role models for their children.

8. Reading and watching movies: You might like to consider suggesting some books or movies about self-growth and a positive attitude, and discussing and thinking about them together.

Finally, with regard to how to respond to the child's feedback, it represents an opportunity to begin breaking down barriers between us and our children and releasing the influence of parents. We can start by feeling, then being surprised, and finally guiding the way we talk to our children.

For instance, you are not worthless. You have our love, which is priceless. Appearance is not the only way to measure a person. Your kindness and uniqueness are all valuable, and everyone has their own strengths. You are no exception.

"The conditions in the family have been achieved through the hard work of mom and dad, and we also believe that you have the potential to create your own bright future through your own hard work. It's just that you haven't discovered your own strength yet."

It is only natural that as a parent, you may feel anxious when facing this situation with your child. It is important to remember to take a deep breath and remain calm. Try to identify the root cause of the problem objectively and be there to support your child as they grow and overcome difficulties. Not only will you see your child's progress, but you will also be learning and growing together.

My name is Tao Zhu Gong, and I'm here to offer you some advice. I hope it's useful to you. Thank you.

Dear questioner, I can totally relate to how you're feeling right now. It's so tough when our kids are going through tough times. It seems like your child is wrapped up in a dark cloud, unable to see the good things in her life and only focusing on her imperfections.

First of all, I want to tell you that your child has so much. She has your selfless love and a warm home, which are the most precious things in the world.

She's got a kind heart and endless possibilities and potential, which make her one-of-a-kind!

When she feels confused or frustrated, we can try to understand and be there for her in a gentle way. For example, when she complains that she is not beautiful, we can tell her in a kind and reassuring way, "My dear, your beauty lies not only in your appearance, but also in your kindness and talents."

And you are beautiful in your own way. You are unique, and that's a wonderful thing!

At the same time, we can help her see all the wonderful resources and opportunities she has. You can tell her, "Even though we don't have an endless supply of money, we have enough to let you pursue your dreams and interests."

"We can explore your interests together and see how we can create more opportunities for you to learn and grow."

I've got a few ideas that I think you'll find really helpful! To help her face life more positively, I suggest you try the following specific and effective suggestions:

1. Set small goals together: Set some short-term, achievable goals with your child, such as reading a book every day, learning a new skill, or participating in a community activity. It's so rewarding when we achieve our goals, and it's a great way to help your child feel their own progress and sense of accomplishment.

2. Help her capture her beautiful moments: Let your child know it's great to record the moments that make them feel happy and content. This could be anything from seeing a beautiful landscape, eating delicious food or spending time with friends. These records can help her pay more attention to the beauty in life and reduce the impact of negative emotions.

3. Cultivate a grateful attitude: Guide your child to learn to be grateful and write down three things they are grateful for every day. This can help her to cherish what she has more and reduce complaints and dissatisfaction.

4. Get some help from a professional: If your child's mood is still really low or getting worse, I'd really recommend that you get some help from a professional counselor or psychologist. They can give your child a more professional assessment and guidance to help them get out of the situation.

5. Regular family activities: Plan some fun family activities, like going for a hike, having a picnic, going to the movies, or playing games. These activities can help you and your family interact and connect with each other, and they'll also show your child that they're loved and supported.

6. Develop hobbies: It's a great idea to encourage your child to develop hobbies such as drawing, music, sports, etc. These activities can give her pleasure and satisfaction in pursuing her interests.

When your child is going through a rough patch, it's important to be there for them. Show them you care by being a warm, understanding, and supportive presence in their lives. Let them know they have beauty within them. Encourage them to take part in activities that make them happy. Help them to see the good in things and to be grateful for what they have. If they're struggling, don't be afraid to seek professional help. With your love and support, your child will gradually emerge from the shadow of depression and regain their confidence and happiness.

I'm sending lots of love and healing thoughts your way! I'm sending you the best wishes for your child to recover a healthy mindset and positive attitude towards life soon!

Hi, I'm Duoduo Lian. I hope I can help.

We understand. It must have been hard to tell us like this without anyone helping. Your child is complaining to you because they are releasing pent-up emotions. Don't worry.

It's a lot to take in at school. There are relationships with classmates and teachers, and the pressure of learning. If these things are not sorted out, they will build up and weigh on the mind. Every child wants to be seen and feel valued.

As parents, we must be patient and attentive. How do we support our children, agree with them, and accompany them as they come to terms with their emotions? First, agree with your child. You are right. There is no perfect appearance, endless money, clever mind, or friends. As parents, we have been remiss and careless. We have no idea how you have managed all these years.

You have faced many challenges. You have kept your struggles to yourself, not wanting to worry your parents. You have felt helpless and in the wrong. You can cry and talk when you want. I will be there for you.

You are a good child who takes on responsibilities at a young age. We can't let you keep doing this. Let's face it together, okay? Let your parents also experience your difficulties.

You've tried hard, but you haven't got the results you want. You're a role model for your parents.

You're not complaining, but you're pushing yourself to be better. What does a motivated person have to worry about? Everyone has a different flowering period. You're unique. We love you, no matter what.

You're young but thinking about life and the future. It's tiring, isn't it? You have a plan and know yourself. We're sad and happy. You've grown up with your own ideas. If you want to rest, rest well and recharge. We applaud you.

Parents can show love and support to their children. Life is unpredictable, but you can help your child get through difficult emotions.

Dear Sir/Madam, I am Bai Li Yina, the respondent to your query. I hope that my reply will be of some assistance to you.

The questioner revealed that her child is experiencing a range of negative emotions due to depression. She believes she is not attractive, not intelligent, and that her family is not financially secure. She feels that these circumstances are unchangeable, which is causing her distress. You are unsure of how to communicate with her effectively and are experiencing significant distress as a result. What should you do?

[Situation analysis]

It is evident that you are unable to communicate effectively with your child. It is also apparent that you are extremely anxious about the situation. While your child's perception may be biased, it is not within your control to change it. You are even afraid that your words may irritate your child, which could potentially exacerbate the situation. You are in a challenging position. I empathize with your situation and understand your pain. Let us collaborate to find a solution.

[Questions to ponder]

1. Could depression be the cause of these thoughts? Has she sought medical treatment, and would she still have these thoughts if she took the medication as prescribed?

2. The rationale behind the desire for a change in perspective is the assumption that a shift in mindset would alleviate the pain and depression.

3. Are you aware of your child's daily life and the nature of their social interactions?

Has she experienced any form of disadvantage or mistreatment due to her appearance or financial circumstances?

[Recommended Methods]

While you may not endorse your child's current line of thinking, it's evident that her current perception is misguided. Have you considered the potential origins of this perception? I'm not sure if you're aware of them.

It is important to ascertain what experiences may have contributed to these thoughts and how long the depression has been present. These are the key areas that require our attention and understanding.

Before attempting to comprehend your child's perspective, it is advisable to refrain from dismissing their opinions. Obtaining further insight may be achieved through the use of guiding statements, such as:

1. If you do not consider yourself to be beautiful, who do you believe is beautiful?

2. Do you consider yourself to be lacking in intelligence, or do others perceive you as such?

3. Have you recently desired to make a purchase, but lacked the financial resources to do so?

4. Could you please elaborate on the source of your distress?

When a child is depressed, they may perceive everything as negative. At this time, it is crucial to provide patient companionship and express love. For instance, you can say, "Mum hopes you can feel that I gave birth to you because I love you. I'm sorry I haven't been able to give you everything you want, but I hope you know that you were born into this world with the love of mum and dad." Alternatively, you can purchase some beautiful flowers and place them in her room to bring her positive energy.

It is undeniable that a mother's pain is unparalleled when caring for a sick child. It is also clear that there is no universal solution to this challenge, as every situation is unique. The key is to provide your child with the reassurance of your patience and love, while avoiding discussions that may be contentious. It is also essential to minimize any negative feedback and convey your unwavering belief in your child's recovery.

As children grow and develop, their ideas and perspectives will evolve. With time, we will gain insights and understandings that may not be apparent at the outset. It is essential to provide children with the space and opportunity to grow and evolve. By consistently demonstrating the values and principles you believe in, you are effectively teaching by example. With patience and consistency, children will eventually return to a positive and productive path.

I hope that the aforementioned methods will prove beneficial to you.

Please be aware that change takes time and patience. There is no need to worry or be afraid. Many people are experiencing or have experienced similar problems.

You have my full support and that of the company. I hope we can find a solution to the problem you're facing soon and that you're able to find a solution that works for you.

I would like to express my gratitude to those who have liked and provided feedback. I wish you peace and joy.

Hi there!

A little encouragement goes a long way. Try to understand the questioner.

How should you respond when a child complains that they were born to suffer?

A child with depression stays home and complains about everything: she's not pretty enough, not smart enough, not rich enough, not popular enough. When there's nothing else to complain about, she starts complaining about being born. All her emotions are a cry for help. As a mother, you'll feel even worse.

Since mothers are usually the most emotionally connected to their children, they often feel responsible and stressed when their child develops an emotional disorder.

It's important to remember that mothers aren't doctors. When a child's emotions reach the point of an emotional disorder (depression), as a mother, there will also be times when you feel helpless and confused. The best thing you can do is just be there for your daughter. Listen to her, understand her, accept her, and provide all the resources you can to help her heal.

So, the first thing this mother can do is to give her daughter greater emotional tolerance and understanding of her illness with the help of a psychiatrist or professional counselor. She needs to understand what depression is and exactly what the cause of her daughter's depression is. Secondly, in life, she needs to use empathy to better soothe her daughter's negative feelings and emotions, provide psychological support and help, and finally, she needs to help her daughter better establish a sense of self-worth and internal self-identification.

Depression can cause strong mood swings, making it difficult for patients to cope with negative feelings and emotions. Sometimes these swings occur periodically, and the underlying causes can be complex. This can also lead to family members struggling to meet their loved one's needs in a timely manner, which can further exacerbate conflicts.

"Why were you born?" is often a question asked by people with depression. It often comes from a place of self-doubt and inferiority. When they can't meet their ideal needs, they often turn their aggression inward or outward (toward their mother). They may also complain or blame themselves.

As a mother, you might also feel your daughter's strong negative emotions or even get attacked. But it's more important to understand your daughter's true emotions and needs first. This is because at this time, the patient can't use a normal cognitive mindset to deal with emotions and interpersonal relationships. So, they need more emotional acceptance and space, as well as emotional confirmation, expressions of love and support. This can calm the other person's emotions and help them see the impact of emotions.

"Of course it's because I love you. Mom is very happy to have such a beautiful and lovely daughter like you. Thank you!" Affirming your daughter's value and encouraging her can help improve her sense of self-esteem and self-confidence.

In everyday conversations, mothers should also listen and understand with greater empathy, rather than using our normal logic to demand things from our daughters. For example, in the past, there was a "critical education" approach, which was thought to motivate children to improve more quickly. But when this approach is found to be unsuitable, then changes need to be made to accept the daughter's real needs and support her with real responses, rather than ignoring them and putting even more pressure on her internally.

If a daughter's growth process has been taken care of and she's been well looked after, it's easier to rebuild the emotional connection with her mother. The daughter will also be more willing to take her mother's advice, even though she might still have doubts about taking action. At this time, the mother needs to be more patient and encouraging, and to tell her child that everyone has value and that even if everyone has shortcomings, it doesn't mean that they've lost the ability to be loved.

On top of spiritual support and encouragement, it's also important to focus on physical health. Regular exercise can help boost immunity and release negative emotions. Try activities like walking, running, playing badminton, dancing, or singing to improve physical function and emotional relaxation.

Furthermore, after doing the above basic operations, it is important to reduce stress and irritating factors, avoid unnecessary stressors, and provide better emotional protection. Stress and irritants can worsen symptoms or directly stimulate or trigger depressive episodes. It is therefore essential to learn coping skills and methods from a professional doctor.

Finally, while depression can take a long time to recover from, it is possible to recover. People who are depressed often doubt their self-worth. Therefore, in the process of companionship and healing, it is important to provide positive guidance to help them see their own value and discover their own strengths. At the same time, when encountering problems, they should try to avoid overgeneralizing and polarizing forms of cognition. It is also important to help them rebuild their excessive inferiority complex to regain a sense of confidence and self-esteem.

I hope these answers are helpful for you.

I hope you get better soon.

Hello, my name is Evan, and I'm a counselor trained in the Transactional Analysis school of thought.

From the questioner's description, I can sense a certain helplessness and impatience. It's not uncommon for a child's emotions to be influenced by her family's approach to education, in addition to her own personality.

From the author's text, it seems that the author is uncertain about how to respond to her child's emotions and is hopeful that things will improve soon. In some ways, this could also be seen as a kind of inability to accept emotions.

I would like to suggest that, when your child is expressing such emotions and complaints, it is important for you, as a parent, to show understanding and support. Your child may be at the stage of forming self-identity and self-esteem, and in the face of peer pressure and the influence of social media, it is easy for them to feel that they are not good enough.

Sometimes, in her heart, the child may realize that her family is not as bad as she thinks, but she just can't help complaining. As a parent, the question asker can try to accept the child's state and allow her to stay in her emotions.

As I am unable to communicate with the questioner's child and cannot fully comprehend her true thoughts, I will offer some advice here on the platform in the hope that it will assist you in communicating with your child.

It would be beneficial to listen and understand.

It would be beneficial for the parent to listen to the child's complaints patiently, without immediately offering solutions or dismissing her feelings.

It might also be helpful for the host to express their understanding and sympathy for your child, and to suggest that feeling dissatisfied and frustrated is a normal part of life.

Affirmations and encouragement can be helpful in these situations.

It would be beneficial for the questioner to affirm the feelings expressed, while also gently pointing out that everyone has a different definition of "perfect" and that everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses.

You might like to encourage your child to consider what they see as their strengths, whether these are special talents, qualities or interests in a certain field.

It would be beneficial to establish the right values.

It would be beneficial for the questioner to guide the child to understand that external conditions are not the standard for measuring a person's value. Rather, a person's value lies in their character, behavior, and contributions to society.

You might consider sharing stories of successful people who overcame difficulties through hard work and perseverance, and realized their own value.

It may be helpful to consider ways of cultivating a positive mindset.

It might be helpful to encourage your child to believe that they can change the situation through hard work, and that everyone can improve themselves through continuous learning and hard work.

The questioner might suggest that the child start with small things and set small goals to achieve gradually, which could help to enhance self-confidence.

It might be helpful to encourage her to participate in social activities and expand her circle of friends. This could help her build confidence and improve her mood.

It might be helpful to seek professional assistance.

In cases where a child is experiencing severe depression, it may be helpful to seek the guidance of a counselor or psychologist.

Seeking professional help together with your child can help her understand that this is a normal part of life and that you care about and support her.

It would be beneficial to consider the role of family support in this situation.

As parents or close family members, we can influence the child's behavior and attitude. The family environment can affect the child's emotions, so it's important to create a warm and harmonious family atmosphere.

It may be helpful to consider that mutual support and encouragement among family members could potentially contribute to a child's positive attitude towards life. It might also be beneficial to demonstrate a positive and optimistic lifestyle, which could help a child to perceive the beauty and hope in life.

When addressing your child's concerns, you might consider saying something like this:

"My dear, I understand how you feel right now. We can all feel frustrated when faced with life's disappointments and challenges. I want to tell you that everyone has their own path and their own timing, and I'm here to support you in finding yours.

Your value is not defined by external conditions, but rather by your heart, your actions, and your growth process. We as your parents always believe in your ability to pursue your dreams, even when the process may be challenging.

If you feel it would be helpful, we can work together to find a way that suits you to achieve your goals. At the same time, if you feel it is difficult to deal with these emotions on your own, we can also seek professional help together.

Please remember that you are not alone. Your mother and father will always be here to support you and love you.

It is of the utmost importance to accept your child's emotions and allow her to express them. The family provides a safe and nurturing environment. Your child may display her emotions in front of you, perhaps seeking acceptance or attention. As parents, it is essential to provide her with a stable and loving foundation.

I hope my answer is helpful to the original poster.

I would like to suggest a few related book recommendations.

I would like to suggest the book Take Your Time, My Child by Lung Ying-tai.

This book comprises a series of letters written by Lung Ying-tai to her son. In these letters, she expresses her love and expectations for her child, while also conveying an educational philosophy of tolerance and understanding.

I would like to suggest the book How to Raise Adult Children by Judith Rich Harris.

The author thoughtfully considers how we might support children in developing their independence and sense of self, while also offering insights into the psychological needs of children during their growth process.

I would like to suggest Positive Discipline by Jane Nelsen.

This book offers a variety of practical methods and strategies for parents who wish to guide their children's behavior in a positive way, while also fostering their self-esteem and sense of responsibility.

Another valuable quality to cultivate is self-control. Kelly McGonigal offers some insights on this topic.

While this book is primarily intended for adults, the self-control strategies it outlines could also prove beneficial for children in learning to manage their emotions and behavior.

I would like to suggest another book that I found helpful: "Emotional First Aid" by Guy Winch.

This book offers some helpful strategies for dealing with emotional trauma in daily life, which can be beneficial for children in managing negative emotions.

I would like to suggest another book that I think you might find helpful: Authentic Happiness by Martin Seligman.

This book introduces the concept of positive psychology and offers insight into how children and parents can enhance their sense of well-being through a positive mindset.

I would like to suggest another book that I found helpful: "I Care About Your Emotions, Child" by John Gottman and Joan DeClaire.

This book offers guidance on how to communicate emotions with children, with the aim of helping parents gain a deeper understanding of their children's emotional needs and respond to them in a more effective manner.

I would like to suggest another book that I think you might find helpful: "Decoding Adolescence" by Mary Pipher.

This book offers parents a variety of strategies to help them better understand and support their children as they navigate the psychological changes that often accompany puberty.

Dear parents, I get it. You're anxious and confused right now. Your child's psychological state is really important for her healthy growth, especially when she's facing depression and negative self-evaluation. As a parent, you're in a unique position to help.

It seems like your child has fallen into the trap of negative self-evaluation and comparison. It's like she feels like she has nothing to offer and is comparing herself to some unattainable standard of perfection, whether it's in terms of appearance, family background, intelligence, or social circle.

There are many factors that can influence the formation of this mentality.

I. Mistakes in children's values

Kids often focus too much on what others are doing right and what they're doing wrong. They tend to neglect their own strengths and growth potential.

Over-reliance on external evaluation: Kids can get too caught up in what others think of them. They might think their value depends on what others say, rather than on who they are and what they can do.

When kids are faced with challenges, they may lack the courage and confidence to respond positively. This is often because they believe that they cannot change the situation, which can lead to negative emotions.

2. How to adjust your child's world view

First, as a parent, you need to listen to your child and understand what they're feeling. By listening, you can understand your child better and give them more targeted support.

Give your child positive guidance based on your understanding of her. Let her know that everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses. It's important to recognize your own uniqueness and value, rather than comparing yourself to others.

At the same time, encourage her to tackle challenges head-on and believe in her own abilities and potential.

Set a good example: As a parent, you can set a good example for your child by showing them what you're made of. Demonstrate your positive attitude, courage in the face of challenges, and problem-solving skills so that your child can see how you deal with various difficulties and challenges in life.

Encourage your child to explore new things and fields and discover their interests and potential. When kids explore themselves, they understand themselves better and establish a more positive and healthy self-image.

Storytelling examples: You can guide your child's thinking and help them develop the right values by sharing stories or examples. For instance, you could tell stories about successful people to show them that success doesn't happen overnight. It takes hard work and perseverance.

You can also tell stories about regular folks to show them that they can stay positive even when they're facing challenges in life.

3. Reflection and improvement

As you guide your child to develop a positive outlook on life, it's also important to reflect on your own approach. Do you tend to focus on your child's grades and performance to the detriment of their mental health and developmental needs?

Are you too focused on external evaluations and comparisons, and have you overlooked your child's own feelings and growth trajectory?

If your child feels inferior at an ordinary school compared to a high-end school, you might want to talk to her about it. Find out why she feels this way, whether it's because of comparisons by others or because she's set her expectations too high.

You can then work with her to come up with some practical solutions, like adjusting her mindset, finding her own interests, and getting involved in social activities.

Finally, I just want to say that your support and companionship are the most valuable things you can give your child as they grow. Please believe that your child can overcome their current difficulties and become a more positive, healthy, and confident person.

It's also important to stay patient and confident, and to tackle the challenges and opportunities that lie ahead together with your child.