Two months before the college entrance examination, I was broken up with, and I feel somewhat numb. How can I deal with this?

Dear question asker,

When faced with a challenge that seems insurmountable, people often react in one of three ways:

One might consider three possible responses to a challenging situation: fight, flee, or freeze.

As you mentioned, you have become numb, unsure of how to handle the situation, and have become frozen.

Could I ask what you think might have caused the breakup?

You mentioned that she is tired. Could it be that you are expecting too much companionship because you come from a single-parent family and are looking for the love that you did not receive as a child to find in your girlfriend, which might be putting a lot of pressure on her?

And with the college entrance exam approaching, it's understandable that the pressure of studying can be quite intense.

It might be helpful to try to understand her perspective.

I believe that when we are independent, we are better able to enter into and gain true love.

It might be helpful to consider that if someone is not mentally or financially independent, their so-called love for another person could be more about dependence or even taking.

If you want others to love you, it would be helpful to first learn to love yourself.

After all, you are still in high school, and it would be beneficial for you to continue growing and developing in order to be able to love in a more mature way.

In just two short months, the college entrance exam will be here.

I believe your ex-girlfriend made this decision probably to focus on her exams, and that she didn't necessarily want to hurt you.

You may be experiencing a sense of abandonment, as if your mother abandoned your father and you. This could be a painful feeling to revisit.

It's important to remember that she's still just a high school student. She made a choice based on her own wishes and didn't lie to you.

It's important to remember that relationships come and go, and that's perfectly normal.

If you become stronger and more independent, you may find that you attract the opposite sex.

You might consider talking to that part of yourself that is wounded, to understand what you feel and what you can do to feel happier and more relaxed. Your college entrance exam is also a turning point in your life. If you want to avoid regret, you might try to persevere for these next two months. I believe that you and your ex-girlfriend will both get good results.

I wish you the best of luck!

It is recommended that you offer yourself physical affection in the form of a hug.

It is not uncommon to experience a sense of numbness and depression when confronted with the dual pressures of the college entrance examination and a romantic relationship's dissolution. The following recommendations may assist in navigating this challenging period:

1. It is important to accept one's emotions, including feelings of sadness and loss. These emotional experiences are normal and should not be forced to subside rapidly.

It is important to allow yourself sufficient time to adjust to the changes.

2. It is advisable to seek support from friends, family members, or trusted teachers. Their understanding and support can be beneficial in helping one cope with difficult circumstances.

Should the necessity arise, one may also seek the assistance of a professional counselor.

3. **Focus on your studies**: Despite the potential for emotional distress to impede concentration, it is advisable to channel your energy towards academic pursuits. Formulating a well-structured revision plan is crucial for ensuring preparedness for the college entrance examination.

4. It is essential to maintain healthy habits, including adequate sleep, a balanced diet, and regular exercise. Good physical health is conducive to better coping with emotional stress.

5. Self-care: It is of particular importance during this period to prioritize self-care. Engaging in activities that promote relaxation and stress reduction, such as deep breathing, meditation, walking, or listening to music, can be beneficial.

6. Set incremental objectives: Establish short-term objectives for your academic and personal endeavors. Attaining these goals can facilitate the restoration of self-assurance and contribute to a more structured lifestyle.

7. It is advisable to avoid isolation, as although one may wish to deal with these emotions alone, interacting with others can help distract one from the pain and ease the emotional distress. It is therefore recommended to engage in social activities and spend time with friends.

8. It is important to maintain hope that with time, one will gradually adapt to one's new life situation. It is also crucial to maintain a positive outlook and to believe that better things await in the future.

9. Professional Help: In the event that one is unable to cope with these emotions or that they are affecting one's daily life, it is imperative to seek the assistance of a professional counselor.

10. Time is an important factor in the healing of emotional wounds. It is therefore important to allow oneself sufficient time to heal and to avoid seeking quick solutions.

It is important to remember that you are not alone and that there are people who are willing to provide assistance. It is crucial to maintain strength during this challenging period and to have confidence in your ability to overcome it.

It is important to maintain a focus on the future and to believe that these challenges can be overcome.