Unemployed and preparing for civil service exams, I feel anxious and fearful, am I making the wrong choice?

First and foremost, it is evident that you are grappling with a complex dilemma and a considerable degree of anxiety. These emotional responses are not only understandable but also a normal part of the process. However, it is crucial to recognize that this is a transient challenge and that it does not necessarily signify a permanent state of affairs. In light of this, I offer the following suggestions, which I hope will prove beneficial for you:

1. Re-examine your options: When confronted with a challenging scenario, it is not uncommon to question the decisions that have been made. It is beneficial to reflect on the rationale behind initially pursuing the civil service examination and to ascertain whether it aligns with one's interests, abilities, and values.

It is not uncommon for individuals to question their previous decisions in the face of current pressures.

2. Accept Failure and Difficulties: The process of taking the civil service exam is inherently challenging, and it is to be expected that there will be instances of failure and difficulty in both one's career and life. It is crucial to understand that accepting these setbacks is an integral part of the maturation process and should not be perceived as a reflection of one's self-worth.

It is inevitable that one will fail at something at some point; the crucial aspect is to learn from these missteps.

3. Set short-term and long-term goals: While facing the current difficulties, it is advisable to consider future goals and plans. Formulating short-term and long-term goals can facilitate a more precise understanding of one's direction and provide a clear trajectory for future endeavors.

4. Seek Support: It is beneficial to share one's feelings with friends, family, or a mentor. At times, seeking external support and understanding can help to alleviate feelings of anxiety.

Such individuals may proffer counsel or present novel viewpoints.

5. Re-evaluate interests and skills: Re-examine your interests and skills to ascertain whether there are alternative areas that align more closely with your preferences or if you can expand your horizons by developing new competencies.

6. Seek career counseling: It is recommended that you consider consulting with a career planning professional or a mental health professional who can assist you in better understanding yourself and in identifying a career direction that is more aligned with your personal attributes and goals.

It is crucial to avoid excessive self-criticism. Each individual's life trajectory is distinctive, and transformation is a typical aspect of life.

It is erroneous to assume that the thirties signify the definitive establishment of one's circumstances. There is considerable scope for growth and transformation. It is crucial to recognise that a challenging situation represents merely a minor aspect of the broader journey, rather than its culmination.

Hello, question asker.

I'm Kelly Shui.

[Waiting for the results of the postgraduate entrance exam, I feel anxious and frightened. Did I make the wrong choice?

After reading your post, I can see that you're feeling anxious and stressed, and that you have high expectations of yourself.

Let's figure this out together.

[About choices]

The original poster said he's a young person waiting for a job to start after taking the civil service exam, which he's currently focused on after graduating with a master's degree.

Does staying at home put you under some pressure? A friend of mine mentioned "waiting for results" while preparing for postgraduate entrance exams, and she was also very nervous waiting for the results.

When we put our all into something, it's only natural to have higher expectations. I'm sure you had a tough time preparing for the college entrance exam and postgraduate entrance exam in the past. Despite the challenges, how did you manage to make it through?

We can look at this as a process. If there are other options, how will you change your mindset?

My friend decided to study for the entrance exam for his favorite major, aesthetic education. The process of preparing for the exam helped him improve his self-study skills and also expand his professional field because he was able to do something he liked and was good at.

The process was also pretty stressful, but he had a lot of "flow" moments along the way. He said that the six months he spent preparing for the postgraduate entrance exam were really worthwhile.

This includes how to break through your own limitations. At the time, he was really worried that his English wasn't good enough. In the end, his grades were actually pretty good, even if they could have been better.

When he realizes he can push past his own limits and achieve more than he thought possible in a short amount of time, it'll give him the confidence he needs to keep going.

We've had a lot of success in the past, which will definitely show you a different perspective of yourself.

This gives us more options and lets us focus on the current exam. We can also try to imagine the future. If we could choose one thing we like, what would you like to do until you grow old?

It's also a good idea to figure out your strengths, combine them, and tap into your full potential.

After all this time learning, you can start to write your own story and really understand yourself better.

Once you understand yourself better, you'll also have a better idea of what you need.

[About emotions]

There are exams at the end of the week, and I'm feeling a little nervous and restless. I feel like I'm not very good at anything, and I can't seem to get anything right.

I can see you're going through a rough patch right now. It seems like you're dealing with some career and love issues.

So, does passing the postgraduate entrance exam lead to a lifetime of success, or just immediate success?

The current loss in career and love represents our mood right now.

Or is this something we'll have to deal with for the rest of our lives?

I think you understand what I'm saying, given your wisdom.

It's the same with illness. We feel vulnerable and in pain, but is this vulnerability a representation of the present moment, or will we be ill forever?

Everyone has their darkest moments, no matter how outstanding they are. Reading about the experiences of others can be a great source of inspiration.

I want to tell you that our current inferiority and anxiety are no more than that. If we accept and see it, maybe we won't give in, maybe we'll feel powerless, and maybe we'll also stop letting ourselves.

I remember reading a book where the existential humanist Yang Sheng-chang shared his story.

When you first visited him and left, he was pretty frustrated and felt totally powerless. But he decided to face the music, talking to his supervisor and going for walks.

The supervisor can only go with him. Let him know that because he's had some tough times, he needs to help himself in all other ways.

We can learn a lot from these stories about the universal problems that affect us all. We all experience loneliness, inferiority, pain, and anxiety, and we're not always confident because of past successes.

All emotions are just in the present moment. You can focus on your own pain or allow yourself to be frustrated.

We can think of life experience as a stage of thinking, and we're in control of our own lives.

Take the time to find yourself, explore your own thoughts and feelings, and tune out any external voices that might distract you.

[About yourself]

When we're feeling down, we often find ourselves with nothing to nothing. Is that really nothing?

Has your learning experience, your experience, and your insight changed since then?

I believe that your previous student life has given you valuable knowledge that you have not yet had the chance to apply.

We might feel a little anxious about turning 30, and we may also feel social and cultural pressure, including gender-based pressure.

Do you recall last year's discussion between Chizuko Ueno and the female students at Peking University?

"Don't fool yourself" is what Ueno told us.

Our past experiences are a valuable asset. Even if we don't have much, we still have ourselves.

We support, encourage, and accept ourselves as we are.

We all know that even if someone is unemployed and unloved, they can still have themselves, including independence and solitude.

Even someone who's wealthy can lose it all, for example, if they lose their health.

For instance, an entrepreneur or celebrity without the qualifications to pursue further education.

You did what you had to do at the right time. If you had really worked all these years, you might still be thinking about going back to school.

At the end of the day, there are just a few things in life that matter: ourselves, our health, our curiosity, our creativity, and our future.

You'll have these with you for a long time to come.

You'll have different experiences at different stages.

You can also take part in some group activities and develop a different aspect of your personality.

I'd also suggest reading "The Plastic You" and "The Power of Self-Growth."

Good day, inquirer. I am grateful for your willingness to engage in this discourse.

A considerable number of individuals experience analogous sentiments during a comparable phase of their lives when confronted with the prospect of an examination. The stress associated with examinations and the pursuit of employment, coupled with the ambiguity surrounding the future, can collectively precipitate feelings of anxiety and self-doubt.

However, this does not imply that one is incapable or worthless. In the grand scheme of life, each individual serves a purpose.

Firstly, it is imperative to refrain from self-judgment. This entails accepting one's inherent imperfections and ceasing to engage in internal conflict with oneself. Instead, it necessitates adopting a tolerant and understanding attitude towards oneself.

This kind of mentality can facilitate a more nuanced understanding of the self and facilitate personal growth. The absence of judgment and criticism allows for a reduction in negative emotions and anxiety, thereby enhancing one's ability to approach challenges and difficulties with greater focus and efficacy.

One should endeavor to adopt an optimistic perspective, inquiring as to what one might learn from the current situation and what incremental action might be taken today to resolve the problem at hand.

What motivates you to work hard and advance in life? What circumstances lead you to believe that life is not entirely negative? It is beneficial to encourage and affirm oneself. Adopting a positive attitude is a gradual process. Despite the potential for setbacks, perseverance will ultimately reinforce one's outlook.

It is my hope that this has been an inspiring contribution to the discourse.