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What should a prospective ninth-grader do who has been suppressing her negative emotions?

Personal information Personality type INFJ Interpersonal problems Psychological tolerance Negative emotions
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What should a prospective ninth-grader do who has been suppressing her negative emotions? By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024

Personal information as stated in the title, personality type infj. Specific description as follows: Whenever I fail an exam or encounter interpersonal problems, I will feel quite unhappy.

When I was in seventh grade, I encountered the above problems and expressed my unhappiness to my parents. They said that I had a poor psychological tolerance and was a "glass heart", etc., and after they had finished talking, they made a long face at me all day and ignored me until I pretended to them that I didn't care and wasn't sad about these things. Later, when I encountered the above problems, I would pretend to everyone that I didn't care or that I was very optimistic (I was afraid that others would tell my parents), but I was actually very unhappy, and sometimes I would secretly cry at night.

I didn't have any particularly close friends at school that I could confide in (I had a teacher that I trusted more that I could confide in, but I would try not to go to her to avoid affecting her with my negative emotions). I had hobbies, but when I was unhappy, I didn't want to do anything. I would hold back any negative emotions that I had during the week. Because of the negative emotions that built up over the years, I often felt tired of living, and even wanted to end my life (the zs plan was ready).

I'm preparing for the entrance exam, and the pressure to study will be even greater, with more exams.

Ryan Nicholas Clark Ryan Nicholas Clark A total of 5125 people have been helped

Hello, classmate! Let me give you a warm hug first, okay?

I totally get it. From what you've told me, I can see how confused you are right now. I've got a few suggestions that might help:

1. Emotions are just a part of life, and they're totally normal! We all feel happy when things go well and sad when things don't go so well. It's these different emotions that make our world so rich and full of color. Of course, nobody likes feeling sad or unhappy, but it's okay to feel whatever you're feeling.

2. It's so important to remember that when we're feeling emotions, the first thing we can do is accept that they're there, whether they're good or bad. When we accept all our emotions, it makes it so much easier to get along with them!

It's totally normal to have all kinds of emotions! Even if we try to control them, they still exist. It's okay to let them out, you know? Try exercising, running, listening to music, or anything else that helps you feel better. There are so many ways to release emotions, and you'll find what works for you. Just keep trying until you find what feels right for you. If you don't let your emotions build up, they won't hurt you. They'll just pop!

3. Do you remember that your classmate had a tough time in seventh grade? It was really hard for her, and she didn't get much support from her parents. I'm sure you felt really sad for her back then. Well, now you're in ninth grade, and you can see how tough it was for her to go through that alone.

We all encounter these situations from time to time. When we're feeling sad, it's something only we can know. Sometimes, our loved ones might think we're making a fuss or are acting strangely. Unlike other illnesses, where symptoms are visible and can be treated with medicine, when we're feeling down, our parents can't always see what's going on inside us. In the past, we might have just needed to be well-fed and warmly clothed, which might have been the life of our parents, but we are different now. We long for more spiritual recognition.

So when our parents feel misunderstood, if we look at it this way, we can try to understand them a little bit better, right? After all, times and cultural backgrounds are different.

4. It's clear that the person asking the question would rather bear all the grievances himself than trouble others too much or make them worry. He has silently endured everything alone. We're sure you'll promise us that you will not bear your emotions alone like this in the future. First, you can talk to someone you trust. The purpose of talking is not to release more emotions, but to find a solution to the problem. The same goes for coming here.

Second, we can think about what is most important to us in the present. For example, we could think about the college entrance exam. This can also help us to distract some of our energy and focus on studying, which is great!

5. We also want you to promise us that you will never think about or do anything to hurt yourself again, because this will not solve any problems. In fact, apart from other people, we also have ourselves, and we want you to be your best self!

We're not dependent on other people's circles. We have our own circles within ourselves, and we're the masters of those circles! You must believe that there is an answer to every problem. We just don't find it sometimes.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with being emotional! It just makes our emotions more sensitive, which helps us to empathize with others more. In fact, there's no such thing as good or bad, right or wrong in many things. We're the ones who think so, but it's not true!

It's totally normal to feel afraid when things happen. Even if you don't do it well, it's still a valuable life experience. When you're not happy and don't want to do something, it's okay to put it aside for now. But don't hold back your emotions. Find a way to release them, and then start again.

Your state of mind is shaped by your environment. Often, the things we encounter are related to our thoughts. Is there really an absolute good or bad, right or wrong? It's all in our minds, my friend. Just be yourself!

With a beautiful expectation of the future, try again and work hard, and don't let yourself feel regret about your future. Your life is your own, and you should never let other people's emotions sway you. You don't have to compromise yourself. I truly believe you will definitely find the most comfortable way to get along with others. As long as you think about it, you will be able to find it. I believe you will also be able to handle everything.

For example, why not try keeping a success journal? It doesn't have to be long, just a sentence or two. If you look back in it from time to time, you'll feel full of energy!

I'm really looking forward to meeting a better you! I really hope everything goes well for you in the middle school entrance exam. I really hope the above can be inspiring and rewarding for you. The world and we love you together!

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Rosalind Rosalind A total of 2257 people have been helped

Good day, host. I am July.

After reading your description, I have a better understanding of the question you wish to ask, and I would like to extend my support in whatever way I can.

From your description of the problems, it is evident that you have been suppressing your negative emotions due to the influence of your family environment. The family environment you are in does not allow you to express negative emotions, which in turn requires you to refrain from doing so.

Indeed, it is not uncommon for parents to react in this manner, as the educational paradigm of their generation did not equip them with the skills to effectively navigate negative emotions. Consequently, they may also lack the requisite knowledge to address the challenges you are currently confronting.

Indeed, recognizing the issues one is confronting is beneficial, as it paves the way for gradual transformation. It is therefore advisable to allow oneself the requisite time to effect these changes, avoiding undue pressure that could impede progress.

In this regard, I have also provided a summary of methods that may assist in alleviating the current situation, with the hope that they will prove beneficial to some extent.

(1) There is no inherent problem with actively expressing one's thoughts and emotions. The issue arises when the individuals with whom one shares these feelings are unable to tolerate negative emotions themselves and, as a result, discourage the expression of such emotions.

(2) It is of great importance to attempt to express one's emotions and thoughts, as excessive suppression of negative emotions can result in significant distress.

(3) It is recommended that the individual confide in a friend with whom they have a positive relationship, express their thoughts and feelings, and further release any repressed thoughts and feelings.

(4) One may choose to record the occurrence and development of one's emotions in the form of a diary, rather than repressing them to an excessive degree.

(5) When one is experiencing elevated stress levels, it is possible to alleviate this through the engagement in physical activity, the listening to of music, the engaging in of conversation, and so forth, as opposed to allowing oneself to remain in a situation that is perceived as stressful for an extended period of time.

The world and I extend our affection to you.

I extend my best wishes to you.

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Brooke Elizabeth Stanley Brooke Elizabeth Stanley A total of 3980 people have been helped

Hello, child! I'm here to give you a big hug. I'm so sorry to hear you're feeling sad. I really hope my answer can help you feel better!

You are particularly sensitive and considerate of your parents, which is wonderful! But perhaps you feel that repressing your emotions and suppressing your needs will satisfy the needs of others. You might think that this will make your parents feel at ease and relieved. But in reality, this is just an unreal side of you that you are suppressing. I think that your parents don't want to see you suffering so much inside that you even want to end your life. But you can change this!

They want you to be more tolerant and not be so sensitive, but this cannot be achieved by repressing our emotions and hiding our feelings. You know what?

Emotions are not suppressed. They have a way of finding their way out, whether that's through tears or simply feeling tired. When we understand the characteristics of emotions, we can use them to help improve our psychological resilience! We can learn to control our emotions rather than being dominated by them. We can let negative emotions occupy our lives and hearts, but we don't have to let them take over!

Once you find ways to release these pent-up emotions within yourself and accept their appearance and generation rather than suppressing them, you'll feel your heart opening up! You'll become more relaxed and able to feel more of the beauty and happiness in life.

I've got some great advice for you!

From now on, accept all your emotions and don't suppress them!

Just as you can't experience the warmth of spring without having experienced the cold of winter, you can't live day and night. There are four seasons in a year, and a day has both day and night! Day has sunshine, and night has moonlight. You can't say that day is good and night is bad—they're both great in their own way!

And the same goes for emotions! Every emotion has a function and meaning. It's simply not possible for us humans to be only happy and joyful while suppressing our sadness, anger, etc. Otherwise, our emotions would become stagnant and unable to flow.

Absolutely! Emotions are neither good nor bad. In fact, what we call bad emotions actually have their own meaning.

For example, anxiety is like the flashing "low fuel" warning light in the car. It brings us a bad feeling, but it is just a reminder that we need to refuel or stop before running out of fuel.

For example, a single mother was feeling restless because of a layoff notice from a colleague. The reason for her anxiety was that she was excited to explore new opportunities and confident that she would be able to provide a great life for her child.

This worry is actually a great thing! It's a reminder for her to work hard, learn new skills, or even find new ways out. In short, anxiety is a sign that she needs to be vigilant in times of peace.

Anger is a great example of a tense and unpleasant emotion caused when your actions are thwarted. It's like water in a closed pipe: if you hold it back here, it will come out elsewhere.

Psychologically speaking, bad moods are a biological response to dissatisfaction with the outside world, or, to be precise, a defense mechanism that exists to protect us from external harm. So, bad moods are not

It's not as scary as we think! As long as we learn to get along with it, we can also benefit from it.

2. How can I embrace these so-called "bad emotions"?

Since repression is not a good way to deal with emotions, there are plenty of other ways we can use to release them!

You've been suppressing your emotions for a long time, but it's time to let them out! There's no need to rush, just keep using reasonable methods to release and relieve your emotions, and you'll see how much better you feel in no time!

I've got some great recommendations for you!

1. Choose the right person to talk to in the right place. For example, you can talk in the chat rooms and groups on our platform. It is a very safe place where no one will accuse or attack you. It is a supportive environment where everyone will listen carefully and try to express their emotions. Expressing your emotions many times is a great way to relieve and release them!

2. Go exercise, do those sports you like, and relax in the process. It's a great way to feel better! Exercise produces substances that make us feel happy, such as dopamine and endorphins. The more you exercise, the better you'll feel!

3. Writing therapy: Let your thoughts and feelings flow onto paper! Don't worry about neat handwriting or logical content. Just let it all out! Set aside 15 minutes every evening to write in your emotional diary.

4. Punching pillows and sandbags is a great way to release your anger by hitting soft objects!

5. Try the amazing empty chair technique to release your emotions! In a room, place an empty chair, assuming that the person you want to confide in is sitting in it. Then, you can express yourself to the chair (anger, abuse are fine)!

3. How to conquer the pressure of the middle school entrance exam!

I think you should focus on two things right now, and I'm excited to tell you what they are!

The first thing you need to do is some self-analysis!

It's time to create a study plan that's perfect for you! When you're putting together your plan, it's essential to take a close look at your own learning style. Don't let other people's goals influence yours. If you set goals that don't align with your strengths and interests, you might lose motivation or confidence along the way. So, let's make sure your goals are tailored to you!

So, the first step to creating a learning plan that works for you is to recognize your strengths and weaknesses in learning and clarify what you need to work on.

It's time to discover your own unique learning style! Everyone's learning style is different. Some have a strong memory and can easily recall what they've learned. Some have a good understanding and can understand what the teacher says the first time they hear it. Some are fast but often make mistakes. And some are slow but very careful.

It's time to discover your own unique learning style! Everyone has a different approach to learning, and that's a beautiful thing. Some have a strong memory and can easily remember what they have learned. Some have a good understanding and can understand what the teacher says the first time they hear it. Some are fast but often make mistakes, and that's okay! Some are slow but very careful, and that's great too!

For example, in mathematics, some people have a strong understanding and are good at learning applied problems; some are good at mental arithmetic and can calculate faster; some have a good memory and remember formula definitions more easily; some have a rich imagination and are good at finding patterns in figure transformations. So geometry is a better subject to study! You can do a comprehensive analysis of yourself and discover your strengths.

It's time to take a look at your current learning situation! You've got this! Determine your grade in the class by comparing it with the rest of the class, which can be evaluated using the following scale: "good, better, average, poor, and bad." You're doing great! Compare your performance with your past performance to see the development trend, which can be evaluated using the following scale: "great progress, some progress, the same as before, regress, and great regress." You've got this!

Now for the fun part! It's time to set some reasonable learning goals.

Now for the fun part! It's time to set some reasonable learning goals.

Learning goals are the direction of learning efforts. Reasonable learning goals can motivate people to forge ahead, thus generating internal drive to achieve the goal. Without learning goals, we'll be lost, but with them, we're set!

Learning goals are the direction of learning efforts. Reasonable learning goals can motivate people to forge ahead, thus generating internal drive to achieve the goal. Without learning goals, we'll be lost, but with them, we'll be set on a path to success!

Make sure your learning goals are appropriate, clear, and specific!

Learning goals should be appropriate, clear, and specific—and you can make them work for you!

Appropriate means that the goal should be challenging but achievable. If it's set too high, it might be impossible to achieve, which could lead to a loss of confidence and procrastination. But if it's set too low, it might not be motivating. The right level is moderate, and that's where the magic happens!

Appropriate means that the goal should be just challenging enough to keep you on your toes! If it's too high, it'll be impossible to achieve, which will easily lead to a loss of confidence, procrastination, and resistance. But if it's too low, you'll breeze through it without putting in any effort, and you'll lose all motivation. Moderate-intensity goals are the ones that can best stimulate our internal motivation. So, set goals that you can achieve with effort according to your actual situation—the kind of goal that you can "reach with a jump!"

Clarity is key! It means that learning goals should be easy to compare and check. For example, the goal "I will study hard in the future and strive for greater progress" is not clear. How should I study? What aspects should I improve? If it is changed to "I will carefully prepare for both math and Chinese classes,"

Go for the gold and achieve an average to above-average level in mathematics in the class! You can do it, and you'll be able to check in the future whether you've reached this awesome goal.

Specific goals are easy to achieve! For example, how can the goal of "an average to above-average level of mathematics" be achieved? The answer is simple: do 10 arithmetic problems and 5 application problems every day, and recite each mathematical formula accurately and without doubt.

I really hope these tips help you out! Best of luck!

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Parker Joseph Singleton Parker Joseph Singleton A total of 1862 people have been helped

Dear question author, My name is Xu Yan, and I am a psychological listener. I understand that you are facing significant challenges, including academic pressures and emotional distress. I extend my deepest sympathies to you.

Firstly, it is important to acknowledge and recognise your own state of mind, which indicates that you are capable of independent and perceptive thought.

Secondly, it is of great importance and benefit to encourage the individual to take the initiative to seek assistance from others.

You have indicated that you possess the INFJ personality type.

Individuals exhibiting this personality type are also referred to as "guides of the spiritual world."

Individuals with the Myers–Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) personality type INFJ are typically characterized as thoughtful, independent, and original thinkers, with strong emotional responses, firm principles, and a high level of integrity.

Typically, INFJs opt to remain silent when confronted with conflict. However, they often possess the capacity to foresee impending conflict before others.

Individuals with the INFJ personality type are characterized by introversion, intuition, and emotional preferences that enable them to act as an early warning system, akin to a radar. However, this ability can be rendered ineffective when faced with intense fear of conflict.

The aforementioned INFJ personality traits need not be applied in isolation. Collectively, we will consider how to utilise the information to analyse and respond to the issues you are facing, thereby facilitating the identification of potential ideas and opportunities.

From the information provided, the following primary circumstances can be identified:

The stress and unhappiness experienced as a result of academic and interpersonal problems.

◇ Due to concerns about a lack of understanding and neglect from their parents, the individual in question attempts to conceal their sadness, suppress their emotions, and even feign happiness.

A lack of channels and opportunities to talk about and release emotions can result in the accumulation of negative feelings, which may eventually lead to depressive episodes and even extreme thoughts.

Anxiety about the future without assistance, for example, the final examination.

Emotions are outward expressions of human experience, providing a wealth of information about the interaction between an individual and their environment. Psychologists define emotions as complex patterns of somatic and mental changes, including physiological arousal, sensations, cognitive processes, and behavioral reactions.

It is important to note that when an individual expresses suicidal ideation, their brain is already sending a warning signal. It is therefore crucial for children who are experiencing suicidal thoughts to seek help from a qualified psychologist at a specialized institution or hospital. This will facilitate a comprehensive diagnosis, consultation, or treatment plan.

Prior to doing so, it is imperative to inform your parents of the situation and temporarily set aside any concerns about their potential reaction.

In addition to the aforementioned crucial measures, there are also some potential avenues for exploration.

It is recommended that you keep a diary.

The act of writing can provide a sense of control and agency, allowing individuals to document their thoughts and experiences in a structured manner.

It is important to accept all of one's emotions and allow oneself to experience sadness and unhappiness.

It is important to consider the underlying causes of events and emotions in order to identify one's own needs.

It is advisable to alter one's self-talk or coping mechanisms in order to mitigate stress.

1. Preparation – A plan is formulated to address the situation. It is preferable to consider potential courses of action rather than succumbing to worry.

2. Confrontation – One step at a time, I can exert control over this emotion. It is permissible to experience this emotion, as it prompts me to respond and practice. I should take a deep breath, slowly, and gradually regain control.

3. Coping – When the fear of conflict arises, it is not advisable to attempt its complete elimination; rather, it is more beneficial to maintain control over it. It is essential to remain focused on the present situation. It is important to ask oneself, "What must I do?" It is also helpful to remind oneself that the situation is not as dire as it may initially appear. It is possible to find solace in the knowledge that it is not the worst thing that could happen. It is also beneficial to engage in constructive thinking by considering alternative possibilities.

4. Self-reinforcement – The situation is not as unfavorable as initially perceived. The approach is proving effective, and the progress is satisfactory.

It is recommended that one should endeavor to practice expressing one's authentic emotions in person.

It is essential to express one's genuine emotions.

It is important to ensure that one does not deliberately hide one's emotions.

It is unwise to feign emotional states, particularly in the presence of one's parents.

It is of the utmost importance to take care of your body.

It is recommended that individuals adhere to a regular sleep schedule, including going to bed early and waking up early, while also ensuring adequate exposure to sunlight.

It is recommended that one engage in physical activity to achieve a state of perspiration, which may be achieved through activities such as jogging, ball games, or walking.

It is recommended that you take pleasure in the attractive natural scenery, musical entertainment, and palatable cuisine.

It is important to recognize that there are always more solutions than problems. It is my hope that this will facilitate the generation of additional ideas. Should you require a platform to express your thoughts, you are welcome to utilize the Yi Xinli platform. I extend my support and love to you and the world.

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Michael Carter Michael Carter A total of 8640 people have been helped

Hello, questioner!

Your "late" comment gave me more information about you and raised three questions. I've set aside time today to write another response to discuss this with you.

You're no longer comfortable writing in a diary.

Mom went through your diary without your consent and "did not react well." I'm sure you didn't feel very good at that moment either. You are still young, and your parents have a legal obligation to protect you. However, they need to know your physical and mental condition in a timely manner. Going through your diary without your consent is unacceptable. It is a lack of respect for your privacy. I'm sorry that she chose to understand you in this way.

Use your mobile phone to ask your questions on the Yi Xinli platform. This way, your mother won't find out and stop you from getting the help you need. You can keep a diary in electronic form. There are many apps to choose from online. Register your account and set a password. This way, no one else can log in and see it.

However, the security of information on the internet itself may also be a problem. Apart from setting passwords for accounts and files, there is no good way to deal with this. I would choose to write and save some of my own texts in electronic form. I know that there is no absolute security, but it is more important to help yourself than to be afraid of being seen.

I want to find the right counselor for me.

This is a very representative and typical question. Many people are confused by it because finding a counselor who is a good match for you is not simple. There are many factors to consider. For example, your own counseling goals, your psychological state, and how much you trust the counselor all play a role. So do the counselor's theoretical and technical schools, availability, professional experience, and personality. All of these things must match your situation.

You will find this information in the "Articles" section of the Yixinli platform, where you can read information introduced by different authors.

However, I feel that the above information provides only a superficial and brief understanding of the counselor and the counseling knowledge. The suitability of the counselor for you can only be determined through conversation. It is also common for some help-seekers to actively seek out a counselor and still not be truly ready to receive help after a considerable period of time. There are many factors that affect the effectiveness of counseling.

This cannot be solved by finding a "process and standard" and following it. However, in the sense of self-exploration, even if you find that the counselor is not suitable for you, this journey has not been in vain. When you are sure that it is not suitable, it actually shows that you have also identified this part of yourself that you have explored. You may not know what you like, but at least you have identified some aspects that you don't like.

I want to know if there is a 100% effective way to get mom and dad to listen to me and hear me out when I express negative emotions.

The meaning of "effective" as mentioned by the questioner is complex and multifaceted. When you express negative emotions, you require your parents to demonstrate active listening skills, emotional understanding, and a willingness to engage in meaningful dialogue about your experiences and feelings. This dialogue should encompass a discussion of the underlying challenges you've encountered and the ways in which the family can collaborate with you to overcome them.

Another example is if the parents discuss with you further what the source of your negative emotions is, whether there is some need behind it that even you are not sure of, and discuss together how to meet these needs.

If you express very negative emotions, they just won't respond to you harshly by ignoring you. Without being able to follow up with attention and care for your situation and condition, your emotional expression is actually just being "responded to" and "ignored" in another way. It's like talking to air—the problem still won't be truly resolved.

Let me be clear: this "effectiveness" requires professional knowledge and skills. Those who have not received training usually lack such abilities. Even some professional counselors may be unable to withstand the strong negative emotions of their clients when working with them if they themselves still have a lot of unresolved personal confusion, which may hinder the progress of the counseling.

It takes a lot of inner strength to accept the expression of other people's negative emotions and to be a "container" for the visitor's spirit. This is also a process of consuming oneself, and it is difficult to do without enough energy.

This is why people hide their negative emotions. They can't catch the negative emotions they throw out. Judging from the situation described by the questioner, it's clear that the parents, like most people, haven't had the chance to learn about psychology or receive psychological skills training. They also haven't realized that their child's negative emotions are asking for help.

They only feel the negative emotions you throw at them, and they are unable to catch these emotions. This makes them instinctively reject you with their own negative emotions to protect themselves from being over-consumed. I believe they are not aware of this, and it all happens subconsciously.

My advice is to express yourself by writing down your feelings and demands and presenting them to them in writing. Include what you need them to do for you to feel free to express yourself. Write in the order of what happened, the feelings it aroused, and what you want them to do for you.

For example, in this incident you mentioned in the discussion area, they were unable to accept your negative emotions and responded to you in such a decisive manner, blocking the flow of your emotions to them and also the channel for the two-way flow of emotions between you. This has caused emotional alienation and a gap between you and them, which is a loss to the relationship between the two parties. They need to allow you to express yourself freely and be willing to understand your difficulties and seek help. Then, mum doesn't have to understand you by going through your diary, and you don't have to rely on your diary to deal with your emotions.

This loss of relationship is mutual. You lose some sense of security and belonging, such as the warmth and support you can get, and the possibility of relying on them with peace of mind. They lose a lot of channels to understand you and the information they need to protect you, and they will gradually lose your trust in them.

There are other benefits to expressing your demands in writing. Instead of having to face them directly, which can cause a tense emotional atmosphere between the two of you, you give them room to feel and digest their emotions. They are more likely to calm down and think about what's going on between you and them, and are more able to devote their attention to trying to understand you. They also have time to think about what they can improve. Moreover, the way you express yourself when writing is bound to be mixed with your own thoughts. This process will make you understand yourself better, so when you express your emotions and needs, you will be clearer in your thinking and more precise in your expression, which will make it easier for them to understand you.

If you want someone to understand you, you have to make an effort to express yourself clearly and make yourself a bit more understandable.

Express your negative feelings towards your parents in a way that is not angry and will make them understand.

That's all. I love you.

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Josephine Josephine A total of 250 people have been helped

Hello, host!

I'm so impressed by your writing! It doesn't sound like that of a ninth grader at all. You have such a mature way of describing events and expressing emotions. It's clear you're much more grown up than your parents!

I can totally see how exhausting it would be to grow up in a parent-child relationship where the mature one is the child.

You mentioned that you are an INFJ, and if I'm not mistaken, you are also someone who is particularly emotional. This is totally normal! The emotional response that the same thing brings to you is, I'm afraid, stronger and more lasting than that of your peers with other personality types. As a result, negative emotions also bring continuous and heavier pressure. It can be really tiring to keep trying to rely on yourself to bear this pressure. You have worked hard!

Would they even hug you tenderly?

I've got some advice on "what if I keep repressing my negative emotions?" below, but I promise it's not as complicated as it seems! It's just a handy reference for you.

If you're feeling overwhelmed, why not ask your parents to share their emotional stress?

I'm not sure about this subtitle either. After all, your parents are not capable of listening to and understanding your feelings and needs, and they do not give you warmth and support when you are vulnerable and suffering. On the contrary, they may even cause you distress or even harm when you ask for help by using crude judgments such as "fragile heart." I know it can be tough! So you have two choices: first, keep up the pretense in front of your parents; second, express yourself repeatedly until they finally stop judging and realize how much they have ignored your needs and what they should do for you.

The good news is that you don't have to put in any extra effort to get the attention you need. You can avoid being bothered by increased parental judgment. The even better news is that you can learn to take responsibility for your own emotions. You'll know what you need, you'll do your best to fight for yourself, and you'll persist without fear of difficulties.

This experiment is worth trying for a couple of reasons. First, parents are your legal guardians, so it's their job to care about you and keep your mental health in good shape. Second, parents might not understand you because they're worried. They judge kids who are well-fed and well-clothed and still sent to school by their own feelings. That's why they say things like that—they're worried. So if you're confused, you should ask for their help. If you keep asking and telling them what you need, they'll realize that you're really in trouble and not as fine as they thought. Otherwise, why would you keep asking?

? You're not alone! There are lots of great mental health teachers and counselors out there who can help.

It's totally normal for parents to have a hard time understanding you when you're going through something tough. It's not easy to respond in a way that's helpful and supportive when you're not trained in this area. It's natural for parents to make judgments based on their own feelings, especially when they want to teach their kids to be strong and resilient.

I have a feeling their parents probably raised them the same way. We all learn how to be parents from our parents, right?

I really think it would be a great idea for you to invite your parents to seek professional help from a counselor together, especially the first method. It's even more important to seek professional help if you've tried repeatedly but to no avail. This will not only enable you to get professional advice on "what to do," but it will also enable your parents to learn and understand what is wrong with the way they treat you. This will help them to think in a different way, and it will fundamentally change their perception and behavior. It will also rebuild your parent-child relationship. This will be really beneficial for your future interactions with your parents. After all, the further you go, the greater the pressure to learn. If your parents cannot give you understanding, warmth, and support, you will always be fighting alone, even under attack from all sides. This will have a really negative effect on you psychologically. It may also affect your physical health and learning efficiency.

I'm here to help you learn to help yourself by recording your emotions in writing.

This method doesn't contradict the two above, but it can really help you. I highly recommend using a writing method to record an emotional diary to relieve emotional stress. Emotions are a form of psychological energy, and energy always needs to flow and is always seeking expression.

In the past, you instinctively wanted to talk to your parents, and you also sought help from a trusted teacher. These actions were all about you seeking to express yourself. It's so important to express yourself! Once you expressed yourself, the energy flowed between you and your parents or between you and your teacher, relieving the pressure and soothing your emotions.

Emotional energy is like water: it flows and does not rot. When we express and flow our emotions, it gives us a wonderful sense of hope and vitality, a feeling of being alive! But if our emotions are blocked, for example if they are suppressed and kept inside, this energy will stagnate, accumulate, and rot. This can make us feel desperate and without a way out, even though we are still breathing and walking!

I totally get why you're in touch with the ZS plan.

I really think you should give keeping an emotional diary a try. It's a great way to let this energy flow and express itself. It's also a really socially acceptable and safe way to do so without harming yourself or others (just make sure you choose a notebook or e-notebook carefully so that no one else has access to it). You can write whatever you want, including those terrible thoughts.

For example, ZS's plan is to write down everything about it on paper, which is a great way to symbolically implement the plan. You've recognized that desperate self and said goodbye to that self to move towards a new life.

You can gradually start to notice your emotions and think about the reasons behind them. This process requires a lot of thinking, and I'm here to support you! If you don't do this, you might miss out on an opportunity to develop this talent.

This process is really helpful for understanding yourself better and learning to tell the difference between things you can do by yourself and things you need help with. It also helps you learn how to be happy! We all need to take responsibility for our own happiness, and there will come a day when your parents can no longer understand and support you.

It's so important to remember that most people haven't had the chance to think and train themselves this way since childhood. And yet, we still expect to be happy! I think this is a topic we need to talk about more in parenting and education. It's up to us to make a change. Everyone who has experienced this kind of pain and despair can make even the slightest change. When you work hard for your own happiness, and you become a little better, your children or the people around you will also benefit a little more. This is how the world becomes a little warmer and more loving, with understanding and support.

? Share a snippet of an article from a WeChat public account here as a closing remark: "How determined are INFJs? They're so inspiring! Even if they are knocked down 100 times, they will get up again for the 101st time.

They are the kind of people who believe in their ideas and decisions, even when others doubt them. They rely on perseverance to achieve success, and it's so inspiring to see them stick to their guns!

That's a wrap! I love you all! ?

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Comments

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Dionysus Davis Success is a matter of having a flair for the thing that you are doing; knowing that it is not enough, that you have got to have hard work and a certain sense of purpose.

I can totally relate to feeling down after failing an exam or having troubles with people. It's hard when you don't feel understood by your parents. I would find comfort in small moments and things that bring me peace, like nature or music. Maybe talking to someone outside of the family, like a counselor, could help express those feelings without fear of judgment.

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Julio Miller Life is a symphony of voices, listen to them.

It sounds incredibly tough dealing with such pressures and not being able to be open about your feelings. I think it's important to acknowledge how you feel instead of hiding it. Finding a support group or community where you can share your thoughts might make a difference. Remember, it's okay not to be okay all the time.

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Jack Miller A teacher's ability to adapt teaching methods is a lifeboat for students in the sea of different learning styles.

The weight of pretending must be exhausting. I admire your strength for enduring through that. If you ever feel overwhelmed, consider reaching out to a professional who can provide the support you need. They can offer strategies to cope with stress and exams without bottling up emotions.

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Larry Jackson Time is a riddle, always slipping through our fingers.

Hearing about your struggles breaks my heart. It's vital to have someone who truly listens. Perhaps there's a helpline or online forum where you can talk anonymously. Just knowing you're not alone might help lift some of the burden. Take care of yourself and remember that seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

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