Why do I seem to work hard every day but still get worse?

Hello, Qingxiang here. I'd like to talk to you about this.

After reading your description, I thought, "This is life." I remember Mr. Zeng Shiqiang once saying, "Is work more important than life, or is life more important than work?"

He said life is important and work is for living, but living is not for working.

We get up early and work hard all day, but for what? We're all working for our jobs. We don't have time to live our lives or think about how to live them.

Think about it: what do you think about every day? How do you do your job well? How do you handle relationships? How do you get a promotion? These are all things that have to do with work!

You worked hard for many years and did your best. When you stopped moving forward, you saw that your former friends and classmates have settled down. They have families, children, and even careers. These situations made you doubt your choices.

I remember a saying from traditional culture: "Timing, location, and people are all in place." We often only see one aspect of people and ignore many other factors.

I read your experience again and remembered two texts I memorized in middle school. One is "Se Weng Lost His Horse." He lost his horse and his child was not sent to the battlefield.

This may be the case. It is difficult to see through the stories we experience based on our own perceptions alone. From the story of Se Weng's lost horse, we should pay attention to his attitude towards things. What kind of choice did Se Weng make? His approach to things is worth learning from.

Another article is "Born in Hardship, Die in Comfort." Heaven tests men with great tasks. It makes them hungry, naked, and poor. It disturbs them. It moves their hearts and hardens their characters. It makes them stronger.

This article shows that our experiences have meaning. Bad things can be obstacles to success, but they can also help us succeed.

You chose to challenge yourself at the end of your question. This means you're still fighting with high morale after turning to a completely unfamiliar field. I wish you the best and hope these thoughts help.

I'm Qingxiang. I hope these thoughts help.

I love you, world.

Good day, question asker. It is a pleasure to meet you.

I would like to offer a summary and analysis of the problem.

From what you have said, I get the impression that you are someone who is not content with being ordinary and is dedicated to hard work.

However, you don't seem to have a very high opinion of yourself in this regard. On the surface, it seems to be because of what you mentioned – when compared with your friend who is content with stability, you find that you are not quite as satisfied as you would like to be.

It is understandable that you feel your current situation is less stable than you would like, and that your company is also behind on your salary. Your friend, on the other hand, has had the opportunity to return to Shenyang after graduation, find a stable job, get married, and start a family. They also have the advantage of being able to leave work on time every day.

There seems to be a stark contrast in terms of a sense of stability.

You may have a sense that you should be striving and pushing yourself forward, rather than allowing yourself to drift.

It seems that your professional values may differ from those of your classmate.

If I might offer my analysis, I believe that…

1. In terms of whether you are getting worse or better, it is ultimately up to you to decide based on your own internal evaluation criteria.

Could I ask you to consider what kind of life and work you would like to have in the future? Do you think I am heading in the right direction, or might I be getting by?

Otherwise, horizontal comparisons may not be entirely meaningful.

It's important to remember that other people's lives are not our own, and that everyone has their own standards of judgment and worries.

2. Have you had the chance to reflect on your goals, or are you simply focusing on immediate tasks?

If I may, I would like to share a quote I came across:

It might be worth considering that paying too much attention to short-term results and neglecting long-term personal goal planning could be seen as "covering up strategic laziness with tactical diligence."

Have you considered planning your life and thinking seriously about your career direction?

As we all know, choosing the right path will yield twice the result with half the effort, but choosing the wrong path may lead you in the wrong direction.

If you haven't yet had the chance to reflect on your goals and priorities, it's possible that your current level of activity might be hindering your progress.

At this point, you may find that the past experiences you have gained are not as competitive as you had hoped in the job market.

If you're considering a change in your professional situation, it might be helpful to start with a clear vision of your desired outcome. This could involve identifying the specific needs of your chosen industry and then focusing on developing your own skills and abilities to align with those needs.

3. Finally, it might be helpful to listen to your inner voice.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider why you had this thought.

Could you please tell me under what emotional conditions you made this judgment?

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider whether you have carefully analyzed the other person's choice. It might also be beneficial to reflect on the factors that you tend to accept or reject.

I believe that by asking yourself a few more questions, taking a closer look at your actual choices, and considering your inner desires, you may find that many of these struggles can be overcome.

I wish you the best of luck.

Hello, questioner!

It doesn't matter if the choice is right or wrong, good or bad!

I don't think about it. From the questioner's description, I can see that after graduation, the questioner chose to drift north. I think it's great that the questioner isn't content with a comfortable and uneventful life in his hometown. He's taking advantage of his youth to explore the world! The questioner also said, "I'm still challenging myself and changing careers to a completely unfamiliar field, and I still feel I can do it."

This reminds me of Wang Guozhen's incredible "Love Life"!

I don't think

I'm going to succeed!

Since I have chosen a distant place,

I will just forge ahead regardless of the wind and rain!

I'm going to win love!

I'm going to win love!

Since you are in love with roses,

You can absolutely, 100% reveal your true feelings!

I don't have to think about it!

Oh, what a joy it is to know that there will be no cold wind or rain behind me!

All that's left in this world is your back!

I don't have to think about

The future is flat or muddy,

As long as you love life!

Everything is within your reach!

Like the original poster, if you choose to go far away, then in the gaps between drifting and struggling, you will naturally long for a brief period of peace and contentment. The original poster might as well imagine that your classmate B, who went back to his hometown to work a 9-to-5 job and get married, would you rather have lived the same life as him? I know I wouldn't!

No one's life is a breeze, but that's what makes it exciting!

The original poster may feel that their friends have it all, both family and career, but in their friends' eyes, they also envy you for not having experienced the trials and tribulations of family life, and for being carefree and adventurous on your own.

Everyone has their own worries, and that's okay! While you may feel envious of others, they may also be envious of you.

Absolutely! Anything is possible!

From what you've said, it seems like you're thinking about changing careers to something totally new and exciting! It's never too early to start something new, and youth is a great asset. With time and energy, the world is your oyster! And don't worry about not having a family yet – you've got plenty of time to figure that out. Being on your own means you don't have to worry about too much and can just go for it!

If you try your best, the whole family will be just fine! While you're still young and haven't yet taken on the responsibility of a family, go for it and try all kinds of possibilities!

And finally, I'd like to give the original poster the same advice: "Since you've chosen the distance, just focus on the journey, regardless of the wind and rain." And if you want to return to a comfortable life, there's absolutely nothing wrong with that either. Just go with the flow. You can always go home if you get tired.

I really hope my answer helps the questioner out! I wish the questioner all the best in the world!