A 22-year-old girl, having been broken up for a week, cries herself to sleep every day and can't pull herself out.

I am pleased to have this opportunity to respond to your query.

Let us proceed to an examination of the aforementioned statements.

Given that the individual in question is 22 years of age and has only been in a relationship for a week, it is to be expected that they would experience feelings of sadness.

Furthermore, your partner is already 30 years of age and is exhibiting a high degree of rationality in their response to the breakup.

& Currently, you are hesitant to move on and uncertain of your next steps.

The questioner is currently experiencing a profound sense of sadness. However, there is a widely held belief that what transpires in the present will eventually become a mere memory.

The current emotional state may be characterized as sadness. However, it is likely that this will subside over time, unless the individual in question is unwilling to move on.

Furthermore, it would be beneficial to acknowledge the depth of your feelings for one another.

The other person is 30 years old and has likely encountered a variety of experiences, which may make their perspective more nuanced than yours. It is possible that they align with your ideal type, which could contribute to your current level of distress.

It would be prudent to explicitly acknowledge the depth of your feelings for one another and the strong sense of connection you both share. Reflection on the care, concern, and love he has demonstrated over the past ten months would likely reinforce this admission.

As the process of remembering unfolds, it is natural to experience a range of emotions, including tears and a sense of emotional distress. However, it is important to acknowledge that these feelings are normal and should be allowed to surface gradually. It is essential to recognize that although love has been experienced, there is no need to dwell on the past or hold onto regrets.

The decision to terminate the relationship was not a voluntary one; however, it was the only viable option at the time.

One might inquire whether the other person is truly as admirable as one believes.

After considering the positive attributes of the individual in question, one may begin to question whether the other person truly possesses the qualities they initially perceived. Is it a result of romantic attachment that one has exaggerated the positive traits and overlooked certain shortcomings in the other person?

For example, the rational fear that was previously mentioned also indicates, to a certain extent, that the other party is constrained in their emotional expression and is unable to allow themselves to be influenced by their feelings.

One must also consider the duration of the desired period of detachment.

The relationship lasted 10 months, during which time the subject experienced positive emotions. How long do you wish to allow yourself to grieve the loss of this relationship? This decision is entirely up to you. When one is not ready to move on, no external force can facilitate the process.

However, when one desires to terminate a relationship, external forces can be employed to facilitate a gradual exit. Thus, it may be beneficial to establish a timeline and gradually disengage from the situation.

The trauma of a broken heart can also be viewed as an opportunity for personal growth.

The dissolution of the relationship has had a profound impact on you, resulting in a state of psychological distress. However, this trauma can also serve as a catalyst for personal growth. By examining the factors that led to the breakdown of the relationship, you can gain insights into your own strengths and weaknesses, and identify areas for improvement.

In the event that the relationship were to be renewed, how might one ensure that it would proceed in accordance with one's expectations? To whom could one turn for assistance as one begins to mature?

What assistance can be expected from this individual?

Indeed, I am the optimal candidate for this role. I encourage you to consider my response as a potential source of insight and value.

Good morning, host.

First, it is essential to ascertain whether there is any possibility of reconciliation. It is vital to engage in a process of introspection and self-reflection to determine whether the relationship was genuinely fulfilling and whether the prospect of reuniting is something that can be embraced. If the answer is negative, it is crucial to develop the resilience and courage to navigate a life without the other person, to accept the future with grace and to embark on a new chapter of one's life with optimism.

What actions can be taken to embrace a new phase of life?

1. Formulate a new and upgraded overall goal for oneself.

It is important to recognize that an individual's energy is finite. By redirecting one's attention to a practical matter, it is possible to effectively overcome the pain associated with a broken heart. However, this requires a certain degree of perseverance, as it is challenging to begin with. It is essential to eliminate the negative mindset that hinders success and promotes unsuccessful outcomes.

However, upon reaching this point, it becomes evident that one's daily life remains replete with opportunities for excitement and engagement. Furthermore, there exists a multitude of hitherto unexplored fields that present a worthwhile challenge, particularly if one derives personal benefit from them. In this regard, one's mental well-being is likely to flourish.

2. It is inadvisable to pester or disturb.

In the event of a romantic dissolution, it is imperative to refrain from any further communication with the other party. Any subsequent attempts at contact are likely to be met with annoyance and will ultimately prove futile.

Consider the multitude of possibilities at your disposal, including what you will eat for lunch, your cat, your idol, a television series, a movie, or a good friend.

3. It is recommended that you take a period of time for yourself, during which you can appreciate the poetry and the distance.

Life is not merely about the drudgery of the present; there is also poetry and distance. In the event of encountering something one is reluctant to face or experiencing an unhappy occurrence, it is advisable to take a walk. This will result in a notable transformation of the individual. The individual's state of mind will undergo a significant shift, their perspective will alter, and they will emerge as a renewed person.

In the event of experiencing a profound emotional distress, it is imperative to acknowledge the situation, disengage from it, and embark on a new journey of growth and self-transformation. With the advent of personal growth, an enhanced version of oneself emerges, ready to embrace the future with resilience and positivity.

Hello, dear questioner! Reading your words is like meeting you in person. I can feel from your words your disappointment, pain, and reluctance in this relationship. I'll describe my point of view, and I hope that my answer will be enlightening to you.

Have you ever heard of the investment defense effect? It's a concept in psychology that's part of the cognitive dissonance theory in social psychology. It basically means that the more you invest in something, the more you like it. So, if you've invested a lot in a relationship, you're probably going to care a lot about it and the other person. That's one of the reasons why it can be so hard to let go after a breakup.

I know it can be tough to let go of the past, but it's important to remember that the above-mentioned defense effect is also known as the sunk cost. In finance, sunk cost refers to past expenses that aren't related to current decisions. It's like irrecoverable expenses.

I can tell you're having a hard time letting go of this relationship and I'm really sorry to hear you're feeling sad. I just want to say that if you keep acting like this while the other person keeps growing and you stay in the same place, this behavior might end up causing you more harm than good.

It's totally normal to feel reluctant to let go of memories after a breakup. It's not just because the other person has been with us for a long time, but also because excessive thoughts of them can make us feel sadder and more upset. One way to cope is to keep yourself busy and try to forget all the pain and things. If you remember memories between you and your ex, don't avoid them, but focus on the present while thinking of them.

Then, try to avoid anything that reminds you of him, and let the pain of the present slowly fade away with time. You can also write down five things that make you feel happy!

Wishing you all the best!

I love you, and so does the world!

Give the questioner a simple hug. It's important to remember that emotional-connections-lead-to-severe-somatization-what-to-do-2776.html" target="_blank">relationships are not a one-person show. They are about growing and facing challenges together. The other person is very rational, so they know exactly what they need. However, relationships require a little emotion and impulsiveness. It's normal to have disagreements.

The other person chose to break up, so they must have their own thoughts and decisions. They are very rational, so they will not be impulsive in their relationships. They understand what they need, what they should do, and what they can do.

The questioner has invested a great deal in this relationship and deserves a future together. However, there are practical considerations that the questioner may not have fully considered. It's time to reflect on the differences and reasons for the breakup, apart from the initial attraction.

The early stages of a breakup are painful, especially when sweet memories keep popping up in your mind. But the other person has already left, and you need to learn to let go and grow. You will heal with time, and you will find the right person for you.

If there's no chance between the two parties, you can't just wallow. The questioner isn't a child; they're about to face work, so they need to be prepared.

If the other person thinks you're being unreasonable, don't give up. Use this as an opportunity to identify areas for improvement. People with confidence are confident in everything they do.

The beauty of the past is to be remembered, but the problems of reality also need to be considered carefully. Know what you need and what you can do, and you'll be calm and unhurried.

I am a small frying pan, and I love you, world.

Hello.

Hello. I understand how you feel. Everyone who encounters such a thing during such a time period needs a period of self-adjustment. It's normal to perceive pain and reluctance.

You see nothing but memories, whether you open your eyes or close them. You feel you can't let go of this relationship. When a relationship ends, someone always leaves first, someone gets broken up with, someone suffers, someone lets go last, and someone cares a lot about the relationship and is reluctant to let go of the little things between the two.

In this relationship, you feel the other person's rationality is terrifying, while you are the one who is reluctant to let go. There will also be a lot of inequality in it, as well as grievances, anger, pain, and reluctance.

First of all, you will feel pain, reluctance, and depression when you face this stage. These emotions and feelings are a normal part of the grieving process for the relationship. It is healthy to allow yourself to experience these feelings freely. It is unhealthy and unproductive to hide your pain and depression and instead face it with excitement and joy.

It's okay to think about and remember what you cared about at this stage and what parts you cared about.

For example, in your memories with him, it is always like this kind of picture. Tell me what kind of things you have experienced and what kind of feelings and experiences you have brought to yourself. Then, throughout this whole process, from your meeting and falling in love to the final breakup, tell me what you know about him as a person.

At this stage, it's time to let go and pay attention to these things. We'll inevitably fall into some scenes and things again and again, but that's okay. We need to allow ourselves more, and we can follow our emotions to perceive and explore, allowing our emotions to flow freely. Whether they are positive emotions such as joy and pleasure, or negative emotions such as pain and anger, they are all energy in our body. As long as these energies are not blocked and as long as they flow freely, our body and mind are well taken care of and expressed.

What is the part that you are reluctant to let go? It's likely that our attachment to the relationship and reluctance to let go, along with our thoughts and fondness for him as a person, still exist. This is also a place where we can repeatedly obsess and expend energy.

We must identify what it is about him that attracts us. Is it his qualities? Is it that she meets our criteria for a partner? Is it something else? Whatever it is, it is the part that makes us reluctant to let go. We can think about it and explore it. As we do, we will see it more clearly and accept it more fully. This will have a very positive effect on how we get through the period of heartbreak.

Hello!

I am a mindfulness coach, and learning is the treasure of the body!

From your description, I can feel the reluctance, discomfort, pain, and helplessness in your heart, but I can also feel your resilience and strength!

I won't go into the details of your troubles over the breakup, but I do have three pieces of advice for you that I think you'll find really helpful!

I have a suggestion for you! I think you should try to accept your current state.

Doing so will make your heart feel slightly easier, which will help you think about what to do next!

You say that you are a 22-year-old girl who fell in love with a 30-year-old Virgo man and broke up after 10 months. Now it's been a week since the breakup, and you cry every day, unable to move on and unwilling to let go. In fact, your state of mind is understandable, because anyone who faces a breakup will be difficult, not to mention that you were probably the one who broke up (because in your description, you said that the other person is rational and scary, and you can't help but remember the good old days). So you have to try to accept your state of mind and "see" that painful self of yours who is unwilling to let go but doesn't know what to do for the time being. This will give you extra mental energy to think about other things, otherwise your mind will be filled with all kinds of negative emotions.

The good news is that you can change your situation by simply accepting it! It might sound a bit contradictory, but it's true. All you have to do is allow for change.

Secondly, I suggest you take a rational look at your situation!

Rational thinking is a great way to gain a deeper understanding of yourself and the world around you!

A rational approach is an exciting one! It requires you to do three things:

One thing is for sure: love is a matter of two people. So if you still can't let go, if you still can't bear to let go, and if the other person has already made it clear that they want to break up, or if you know that there is no chance of you getting back together, then you have to accept the reality. But don't worry! There are plenty of other exciting things in your life to focus on.

In other words, you need to understand that you and he have broken up. And now it's time to move on to bigger and better things!

Second, get excited about all the other amazing things in your life!

In other words, you need to understand that there are so many worthwhile things in your life! Don't let the breakup get in the way of doing other valuable things.

And of course, saying this doesn't mean that love is unimportant! Love is important, and everyone longs to love and be loved. But in addition to love, other things you care about, such as family ties, friendships, and your career, are also very important!

And the best part is, you can change the status quo!

When you change, your life situation will naturally change, so you need to give yourself a reason to change now. And you know what? Change is only possible if you "want" to change!

Of course, this doesn't mean you have to let go of this relationship! Sometimes it's okay not to let go. What's more, that experience with him has become a part of your life. So, avoid being trapped by the breakup and embrace the exciting future ahead!

When you look at it rationally like this, you'll be amazed at how quickly some of those negative emotions inside you will start to disappear!

I've got another great suggestion for you! Focus on yourself and think about what you can do to make yourself feel better.

When you take a step back and look at the big picture, you might just see what you need to do to make things better! At this point, you focus on yourself and try your best to do a good job.

For example, you can give yourself some time to think about whether you and the other person still have a future together. Such introspection may help you to recognize reality and thereby ease some of your negative emotions. This is a great opportunity to reflect on what you want and don't want in a relationship.

If you are sure that you cannot be together, try to "express" the content of your "memories" by writing them down or talking about them (here, you can use the empty chair therapy in psychological counseling). When you "express" your inner thoughts, you are likely to feel more relaxed, because once thoughts or emotions start flowing, they can have a healing effect. Of course, you can also "express" your reluctance, which will also make you feel more relaxed.

If you think there's still a chance for you, then go for it! Try to communicate with him sincerely and tell him what's on your mind. This communication itself may also make you feel better, because whether or not it is finally salvaged, you have made an effort!

You can also talk to your family, close friends, and other trustworthy people. This kind of emotional release may also make you feel better, so go for it!

You can also try telling yourself that you don't necessarily have to let go, because the experiences you had with him are already part of your life. You can't completely cut yourself off from the past and forget it, but you can reduce the interference and negative impact of the past on your current life! For example, if you can't control the memories, let your mind go back to them. This kind of "permission" may actually make you remember less, because that's just how the brain works: the more you try to control it, the less you can. Then you try to do other things (reading, working, exercising, etc.). Slowly, you may find that even if you still can't let go, life can still go on, and this will make you feel better! In short, you have to know that you can do something to change the situation.

And the best part is, when you start taking action, those negative emotions will start to melt away! Because guess what? Action is the enemy of negative emotions!

I really hope my answer helps you! If you want to chat some more, just click on "Find a coach" at the bottom and I'll be in touch!

Hello, question asker!

After reading your question, I totally get where you're coming from. Let me give you a big, warm hug first!

Let's dive into the problem you encountered!

You've been in love for more than ten months, and your partner is a 30-year-old Virgo male, who is incredibly rational when it comes to love. I can't help but think about the memories all the time, and I don't want to let go. What an amazing experience! What should I do?

Let's dive right in and analyze the problem!

1. The questioner has spent 10 amazing months with the 30-year-old boy and has many fond memories. She is reluctant to let go, but in fact, she is reluctant to let go of not only him, but also herself, who has given so much but is not willing to admit her own powerlessness in the face of reality. She is excited to see what the future holds for her and the 30-year-old boy!

2. The other person is 30 years old, while the questioner is 22 years old. The needs of the two parties are different, which makes things really interesting! The other person, a boy, may be in a relationship and wants to get married in the short term. He will take into account many practical considerations, including the personalities of each other, family backgrounds, etc. In the context of worldly values, he cannot afford to wait, or he just wants to find someone who is ready to get married right away. As for the questioner, she may think that she is still young and that girls can be in a relationship for two more years without rushing into marriage, which is a great attitude to have!

But for him, there are so many possibilities after two years! He has the exciting opportunity to explore different paths and make decisions that align with his values and goals. While his parents may have certain expectations, he has the freedom to make choices that are right for him. He can embrace the uncertainty and embrace the journey!

I'm excited to share the solution with you!

(1) Get your emotions in order! The most important thing to remember is that nothing is irreplaceable. If someone loves you, they'll come back even if they lose you. And if they don't love you, they'll leave even if you hold on to them!

Regret is just a part of life, and beautiful memories will eventually fade. Loved ones, including our parents, will eventually leave us, and that's a good thing! It's then that we realize just how important they are to us.

(2) Remember to love yourself! The original poster should absolutely not give up on themselves. Love others by loving yourself first, put on some nice makeup, and do all those things you wanted to do before but never got around to. This is the only way to let go of someone and start an amazing new chapter!

(3) Let's toss the past! Get rid of all those things that remind you of the past so you don't get emotional and sad when you see them. And don't go to the places you went to together so you don't feel down.

(4) Get out there and explore! You can join a tour group or go on a solo trip. A wider perspective will clear your mind and make you feel better. Your suffering and loss will go away.

(5) Unconditionally accept yourself and the other party with reason. Don't suppress yourself. It's okay to cry when you should, and it's okay to eat when you should. But give yourself a deadline. You deserve to move on from this. When you can't forget, think about his good points, but don't have too many illusions. You'll find the right one for you!

(6) Embrace reality! It's okay, life goes on. And you can't do anything about it anyway. If he doesn't like you, he just doesn't.

(7) Find things to enrich yourself, such as learning handicrafts DIY. It's a great way to make the most of your time!

(8) Take your time and enjoy the journey to your next relationship. You can't fit two hearts in one chest, but don't doubt the beauty of love. All the experiences you miss and lose are just clues that there is someone even better waiting for you ahead. You are worth it!

(9) You can do it! Stop meaningless self-mental depletion, do more with less, and stop overthinking.

I really hope my answer helps you! I wish you could leave this sad situation behind you and find love. The world is your oyster! ?

Leave it to time.

Many people who have been heartbroken are unable to forget the other person. It's actually very simple. If you can't forget, just don't forget. There's nothing wrong with keeping this memory in your heart.

Time is the best litmus test. Everything will fade with time. You can get through this. It's not insurmountable. You will be able to come out of it sooner or later. Don't rush things and make things difficult for yourself.

You will only make things worse for yourself if you struggle in your heart and try to hold on to something you cannot let go of. This will only intensify and amplify the painful feeling.

You must not struggle or resist. Instead, establish a third perspective and observe your emotions. Just watch them silently, without judging or blaming.

Feel your painful feelings. When you become aware of them, they will fade away.

Your heart will return to peace.

You gain more than you lose.

You haven't lost anything apart from losing someone who doesn't love you. You're still the same person, but you're more perceptive when it comes to relationships. You also have the right to be loved by all the men in the world. This is a gain.

In the world of relationships, there is no right or wrong, only suitable or unsuitable. You spent 10 months proving that this type of man is not the one for you, avoiding a pitfall for your future happy marriage. You did the right thing.

You don't have to do anything to feel better when you're heartbroken. Just be with yourself, quietly.

You've got this!