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By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024
Hello, questioner! I can feel your sadness and confusion through your words, but I'm here to help! I'll describe my point of view, and I hope my next answer will inspire you!
As your relationship deepens, you'll start to see the best in others. For example, when you think you have poor grades, you'll look for the best in people with poor grades because you'll realize that your grades are just a fact of life. You'll see that other people's grades are just as valid as yours. It's a bit like the pot calling the kettle black, and in fact, they are essentially the same.
This fascinating psychological behavior is called projection. Have you ever considered whether you exhibit this behavior when you disapprove of your husband's actions?
Secondly, you can establish good communication with your husband. Conflicts are not that bad! It's more about how we deal with problems that arise after the conflict. Look at your relationship with your husband with a developmental perspective. Zhang Shengyu You can communicate with your husband and establish some rules with him. For example, when you discuss things with others, you can let your husband sit in on the conversation and better explain the reasons and consequences of the matter.
It's so important to remember that what you think is not always real. Once you've had a calm and peaceful conversation with your husband, you'll be able to understand his perspective. Our brains play a huge role in how we perceive things, and this is the ABC theory of psychology! When you encounter something negative, if your thoughts are negative, you'll have negative thoughts about the matter. This will affect your next series of actions. But don't worry! You can change your perception and try to communicate with your husband.
Second, you need to remember that both of you are feeling tired. But there are ways to relieve your inner suffering! Try taking up a new hobby, writing short essays, meditating, or even drawing. All of these activities can help you feel better!
Wishing you all the best!
I love you, world! And I love you too!
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Comments
I can see how challenging it must be to navigate these dynamics. It sounds like you're feeling quite stuck and are trying to balance very different family cultures. Communication seems to be at the heart of this issue, and finding a way to express your feelings without triggering conflict might help. Maybe focusing on "I" statements could ease the tension when you talk about your needs.
It's tough when you feel like you're walking on eggshells around someone you love. Perhaps suggesting professional counseling as a neutral ground where both of you can express yourselves more openly could be beneficial. A therapist might provide tools for healthier communication and mutual understanding.
Your husband's sensitivity and need for protection seem to come from a place of deep care for his family. It might help if you acknowledge his feelings and assure him that you respect his family, even if your ways of showing it differ. Sometimes just knowing someone is trying to understand can make a big difference.
Balancing two contrasting family styles is no easy task, especially when raising children. Have you considered setting up a regular time with your husband to discuss household matters calmly and constructively? Setting boundaries for these discussions could prevent them from escalating into arguments.
Feeling trapped between two worlds must be incredibly draining. It's important to take care of yourself too. Can you find support elsewhere, perhaps through friends or community groups? Sometimes having an outlet outside the immediate family circle can provide relief and new perspectives on handling complex family situations.