Does this long-distance relationship, where they always complain of being tired, mean it was wrong from the very beginning?

Good day, landlord. I hope my response proves helpful to you.

I empathize with your situation. I, too, was in a long-distance relationship. There were significant challenges during that period. However, if you are committed to the relationship and willing to make adjustments, it can improve. For long-distance relationships, it's essential to implement strategies to safeguard the relationship.

The issue of distance in a relationship presents a natural conflict between the emotional aspects of love and the practical realities of physical separation. If this challenge is not effectively managed, the likelihood of the emotional bond being compromised by the physical distance is high.

When two individuals are in different locations and unable to be in each other's presence, they may experience feelings of insecurity, which can potentially lead to a crisis of trust. If these crises are not promptly and effectively addressed through communication, the relationship may gradually deteriorate, potentially resulting in a breakup.

The impact of distance on relationships is significant, as there are three essential elements to a perfect relationship: intimacy, passion, and commitment.

The most successful intimate relationships are those in which both partners are committed to maintaining intimacy and enhancing their sense of responsibility towards each other. However, maintaining intimacy in long-distance relationships is challenging. While a hug can be an effective solution in some cases, emotional barriers can lead to misunderstandings and the accumulation of negative emotions. When coupled with the cumulative effect of different living environments and social circles, it becomes increasingly difficult to maintain common ground and understanding. The erosion of trust is a significant concern in long-distance relationships.

There are numerous potential sources of uncertainty for two individuals residing in different locations. These include ambiguous messages, delayed responses to messages or phone calls, group photos with other individuals of the opposite sex, and instances of dishonesty. Such factors can erode trust and contribute to the failure of long-distance relationships due to the challenges posed by distance and time.

What strategies can be employed to overcome the challenges posed by long-distance relationships and maintain a harmonious and long-lasting relationship?

1. Develop effective communication skills to build a trust-based relationship.

The most challenging aspect of long-distance relationships is communication. Many individuals assume that communication is primarily dependent on language. However, empirical evidence suggests that verbal information accounts for a mere 7% of communication, while non-verbal cues, including tone of voice, facial expressions, and body language, comprise a significant 93%.

It is therefore impossible for two people living apart and communicating to fully understand each other's emotional state. Even if communication is via video, it lacks the participation of touch and smell, and it is impossible to fully understand each other. It is therefore important to improve the depth and efficiency of communication.

In order to maintain effective communication over distance, it is recommended to: report daily, learn to share, and avoid conflict. Express your feelings and needs in a timely manner, share each other's lives, provide the other person with insight into your living environment and dynamics, and enhance each other's sense of security.

2. It is advisable to reinforce the sense of ritual, and a brief separation is preferable to a new marriage.

It is essential to preserve the love between two people, which requires a sense of ritual. For couples living apart, it is particularly important to strengthen the sense of ritual to achieve the state of being newlyweds after a short separation.

It is advisable to establish a set of rules.

It is possible to establish a set of guidelines to facilitate regular romantic interactions between the two parties. These could include a practice of saying goodnight to each other every night, maintaining a regular schedule for video calls, and addressing conflicts promptly rather than allowing them to fester. It is important to avoid allowing disagreements to persist overnight.

It is important to create an atmosphere of romance.

It is important to express your thoughts and love for your partner in an appropriate manner to ensure they feel cared for. It is also beneficial to surprise your partner with a thoughtful gift, such as a poem, voice message, or song, when possible. If you travel frequently, consider purchasing a gift from a selection of items your partner has mentioned to you. This demonstrates your consideration and attention to their preferences.

3. Create romantic expectations and leverage the power of commitment.

Among the three elements of love, commitment is of particular importance in long-distance relationships. It serves as a crucial driving force for overcoming current difficulties. Without an expectation of the future, it becomes challenging for the two individuals to withstand the torment of loneliness and longing. Therefore, when apart, it is essential to prioritize opportunities for frequent communication and interaction. Before each separation, it is beneficial to begin establishing expectations for the next time you meet. This can be done by being as specific as possible and sharing the anticipation. For instance, "We will meet in a month, and I will cook a big meal for you, so you can taste the loving cooking I have practiced for you."

If circumstances permit, it is advisable to address the issue of living apart and make an effort to spend time together. This may prove beneficial in fostering intimacy. In the event that this is not feasible, it is essential to demonstrate commitment to your partner and consider ways to compensate for the resulting emotional challenges, thereby fostering a sense of ease and stability in the relationship.

While love is often simple and pure, relationships require management. It is essential to learn how to effectively manage our intimate relationships and navigate various practical issues to ensure a positive and fulfilling relationship.

Best regards,