How can a marriage of four years be maintained when the couple have become enemies?

Hello, question asker, My name is Ziding Yaxiang, and I want to extend a supportive gesture from across the room.

From what I can gather from reading the question, it seems that the relationship between the questioner and her husband has reached a point where it is struggling to recover. As the saying goes, it is better to demolish ten temples than to break up a marriage, so it would be worth exploring ways to rebuild the relationship.

It is often the case that friends and relatives would rather persuade than argue. Given that no one can experience your life personally, it is understandable that the person in the dilemma may feel they know best.

Perhaps we could work together to find a solution to these current problems.

1. From the outset, there were indications that the union might face challenges. Prior to their marriage, there was a disagreement over financial matters.

However, this matter has yet to be fully resolved. As a result, in the marriage, the questioner would like to exercise the right to manage the family finances, but has not yet received her husband's consent.

This also sets a precedent for the future of the marriage. If this matter can still be discussed, it might be constructive to consider together the financial management of the household income and expenditure, and who is the most suitable person to handle this. In this way, the two people might still have room to manoeuvre.

2. Domestic violence has occurred in the marriage. Regardless of whether or not the couple still love each other, such behavior can have a detrimental impact on the relationship.

It seems that both parties have adopted a negative attitude towards their marriage. It appears that the role of the in-laws was not as constructive as it could have been, and that the child's feelings were not fully considered.

It is unfortunate that the child was hurt.

3. The questioner mentioned that they had previously attempted to obtain a divorce at the civil affairs bureau, but were unsuccessful due to certain issues. It is likely that these difficulties were caused by the questioner's concerns and considerations.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider the impact of this decision on the family's reputation, the children's well-being, and your future plans. It seems that the husband is firmly resolved to proceed with divorce.

We would like to respectfully inquire as to whether there is still a possibility for you both to make the necessary changes for this marriage to continue. We hope that you will take the time to consider these questions in a calm and thoughtful manner.

This is something you should consider for yourself.

It is my sincere hope that my reply will prove to be a source of inspiration and assistance to the original poster.

Hello, Jiayun.

You wonder if your partner wants to leave.

You don't know if you can stay married.

The answer to this question doesn't lie in your husband's thoughts. It lies in how you view your relationship and how you want it to change.

Let's go over this again.

1. You said you had many arguments about money before and after marriage. He didn't tell you how much money he made and didn't give you money, which made you and your parents unhappy.

2. He has a physical disability, and your sex life seems to be unharmonious.

3. You communicate with anger, accusations, attacks, and violence.

Your marriage was falling apart, but you were afraid and didn't go through with it.

What were you afraid of? Take some time to figure that out.

Problems in a relationship are found by both people. The relationship is not healed by one person's decision.

Don't let your husband, parents, or in-laws make you give up the relationship. Take care of your own needs.

Whoever suffers, changes. This is true in relationships too.

If you pay attention to your thoughts and feelings, you can make the right choice.

Hello, my name is Jianlin, and I'm a psychological counselor.

It has unfortunately led to some confusion and distress in your marriage. Financial issues have also caused some difficulties between you.

Additionally, his physical defects after marriage have contributed to your parents' feelings of resistance towards him, even to the point of encouraging you to consider breaking up with him.

This can unfortunately lead to some major conflicts between the two sets of parents. As a result, your feelings for each other may have diverged to a certain extent, and you may feel like strangers.

In the face of his extreme anger, he asks you to get a divorce, but you are afraid and dare not go on. This is precisely why

You may feel that the quality of your relationship has changed. You might have doubts about your marriage and your actions, and you may be unsure about how to move forward in the future. You might feel confused.

First and foremost, from a family perspective, it can become quite challenging when a number of factors are present simultaneously.

It is not uncommon for couples to experience disagreements and conflicts. If both partners are not as tolerant and understanding as they could be, it may lead to more issues. Additionally, when there are physical differences, it can be challenging to navigate.

Such feelings of inferiority may intensify over time if they are not addressed.

If there is a change in your relationship or a problem arises, he may exaggerate the issue and respond in a way that is less than rational. This can lead to a range of psychological challenges.

From love to hate, from hate to mental torture. Of course, this can be a great hurt to each other.

When he expresses a desire to divorce you, you may find yourself acquiescing. It's understandable that what he feels is not your concern, nor is it the family's or your own feelings of love. It's also understandable that you feel you can't live without him, and that you're experiencing a sense of superiority and conceit.

It can become an even greater challenge for you. You may find yourself seeking relief or expressing your inner struggles.

I can sense your inner turmoil, the pain you're experiencing, and the confusion you're grappling with.

It is often said that a marriage needs to be managed. From a management perspective, it would be beneficial to care for and tolerate each other.

If you were in my position, how would you treat a customer you were determined to keep? What approach would you take to accommodate them?

And to achieve your own goals. It would be very beneficial to learn to manage.

If I might suggest, this is a situation that requires our attention.

Perhaps there is another way to approach this. It seems that, in your current approach, there is no way to change the relationship between you.

In such a situation, where there is constant cold violence or various problems, I suggest you consider creating some distance to allow for the possibility of beauty to emerge.

Perhaps it would be helpful to take some time apart to give yourselves space to calm down and think about your feelings for each other.

If circumstances allow, it may be beneficial to continue maintaining the family unit, which can also be advantageous for the children. However, if there are significant differences in opinion and being together is a source of distress for both parties,

It might be helpful to consider that a good parting is also a way forward. If circumstances allow, it could be beneficial to try to maintain a good original family, which could provide a great deal of protection for us and for our children.

I would be interested to hear your thoughts on this.

We have taken the time to carefully consider your feelings of confusion and uncertainty. It is my hope that this has provided you with some inspiration and assistance. Thank you.

Hello.

It sounds like your marriage has hit a wall. You don't know how to move forward.

If you turned against your partner and became enemies, what made you stay?

What now?

If you don't love your husband anymore and only hate him, why don't you divorce him?

How did you meet? How did you fall in love?

What's confusing is:

Are the problems between you and your husband about money? Or is it because you don't talk to each other?

You need to deal with your anxiety and anger if you want to save your marriage.

Which negative emotions are caused by your expectations for your marriage and husband?

Are they caused by your husband's character problems and poor communication?

Your husband belongs to you and your marriage, but he belongs to himself too.

Your marriage is only part of his world. This can help relieve your anxiety and anger.

If it's about money, you need to communicate openly and honestly. Try to express your requirements.

Consider your husband's finances and if your demands are reasonable.

You need to remember that requests should be made in a way that allows for negotiation.

If you complain and accuse, it won't help.

Is it worse?

Husbands and wives should resolve conflicts between themselves.

If you involve the whole family, including the parents, it will make things worse.

If you feel aggrieved in this marriage because of financial problems,

You need to work hard and be financially independent. Otherwise, you should not rely on your husband's money.

You are passive, satisfied with your income, and watch what you say to avoid upsetting others.

Passive, and have no right to speak?

Finally, I need to remind you of one thing.

If your husband is disabled, you should know that most disabled people

They are sensitive and have high self-esteem. They cannot tolerate belittlement or disparagement.

It's lethal for him.

I'm counselor Yao. I'll support and care for you!