I see, I have turned my eldest son into my injured childhood self?

Good day. I am Cheng Yan, a listening coach, and I am honored to respond to your inquiry.

From your description, I can appreciate the challenges you face in raising two children on your own. You highlighted some key aspects related to your eldest child, and I can sense the joy, happiness, busyness, and anxiety that come with being a new mother.

In particular, you were torn between focusing on your eldest child and preparing for the civil service exam. You were experiencing significant stress, with limited time and energy. The anxiety, distress, and helplessness, along with the prolonged internal turmoil, significantly impacted your energy levels. Even when your eldest child needed your attention and attempted to gain it through crying, you were unable to respond effectively.

A child's crying is a significant stressor for adults, often leading to feelings of loss of control. Adults may naturally hope that the child will stop crying and demonstrate understanding. This is a common and understandable response.

An individual with sufficient energy may be able to withstand this pressure or may identify a solution to comfort the child and end the crying, thereby eliminating the pressure. However, due to a lack of available energy, it is challenging to cope with the child's crying and to devise a solution to comfort them. This can lead to significant distress. When the relationship between a parent and their child is unresolved and a positive communication pattern has not been established, the arrival of a second child can further exacerbate the situation.

You find it increasingly challenging to maintain a healthy work-life balance. You even consider maintaining a physical distance from him. You believe that he has matured, can be self-sufficient, and should understand your perspective.

You utilize this rationale to persuade yourself that your decision and conduct are justified, thereby alleviating a degree of personal responsibility. However, if you are tasked with addressing the emotional requirements of both children, it can be likened to two immense, all-consuming entities that will overwhelm your capacity as a mother. Consequently, this response represents a form of self-preservation and self-defense mechanism for you, potentially a subconscious behavior.

However, you were not aware that he still requires your support. He also senses your deliberate estrangement and the harsh expectations you have of him. He frequently requests a hug, but you do not offer one. He may have learned to be helpless. He has genuinely become self-sufficient and no longer desires that level of involvement.

Upon resuming physical contact in the form of a hug, you perceive a shift in the emotional dynamic. You sense a growing distance and a sense of strangeness between you. This prompts you to reflect on past actions and their potential impact. Despite his growth and development, he remains a child, only six years old.

You experience a degree of remorse and self-blame, and perceive that you have caused your child trauma. You also wish to implement changes and make amends.

I empathize with your situation as a mother. This process of sorting out and self-awareness is highly meaningful and will have a significant impact on your child's upbringing and the parent-child relationship between you.

It is important to remember that everyone is a first-time mother and that it is impossible to do everything perfectly. This is especially true for second-time mothers. One of the most challenging aspects of parenting is learning how to provide each child with the motherly love they need. This is a profound subject that requires constant exploration and interaction with your child to understand their needs.

My child is now six years old and is maturing at a slower pace. It is possible that he no longer requires the same level of proximity from his mother due to his age, as he is engaged in a more active social group and peer interaction. Your detachment from him is partially influenced by this, and it is not entirely your fault.

From a developmental psychology standpoint, while establishing an attachment relationship in childhood is crucial (as evidenced by your exemplary parenting during his early years), this pattern is not rigidly fixed as one matures. Transformations in roles and the formation of relationships all influence a child's attachment patterns.

Furthermore, the remainder of your life will afford you the opportunity to make necessary corrections, adjustments, and rebuild.

Therefore, it is recommended that you, the mother, attempt to relieve your anxiety. Should you feel that you have not performed adequately, it would be advisable to make the necessary adjustments in due course. It is important to recognise that there is no such thing as a perfect original environment, particularly in the context of childhood trauma.

It would be advisable to apologise to your child, accept your own shortcomings, let go of the past and rebuild the ideal parent-child relationship with your child.

I hope this information is helpful to you. Best regards,

I would like to extend my warmest regards to you and your family.

I get it. Motherhood is tough. It's a big responsibility, and it's not easy to balance taking care of a child with other pressures and expectations, especially if you're raising a child on your own.

From what you've said, it seems like you're feeling a lot of anxiety and pressure when it comes to raising your eldest child. These negative emotions might be affecting your close relationship with him. You mentioned some rejection and hostility towards your eldest child, as well as tension when he needs to rely on and be close to you. This shows that you're facing some inner conflict and struggles.

It's possible that while you're trying your best to provide for your eldest child, you also want to understand and be supported. There might be misunderstandings and communication gaps in your interactions with your eldest child, which prevent you from truly expressing your inner needs and emotions.

On the other hand, your desire to learn and plan for your future has increased your stress and anxiety.

As a mother, it's important to remember to care for yourself too. Raising children is a long-term challenge. Don't be too hard on yourself, and don't blame your anxieties and stress on your eldest child.

It's important to listen to your inner voice, accept your emotions, and find ways to release your stress and regulate your emotions. This could be sharing with family or friends or seeking psychological counseling.

Building a healthier and closer relationship with your eldest child takes time and effort. Try to communicate with him more, express your love and care, respect his feelings and needs, and slowly build trust and intimacy. At the same time, learn to accept your emotions and mistakes, and try to make up for and improve past shortcomings.

Your upbringing may have left you with some complex emotions and perceptions about motherly love and intimacy, which have affected your interactions with your eldest child. You may want to try to review your childhood experiences, explore your relationship with your parents, and think about your understanding of motherly love, dependence, and independence. This will help you better understand and deal with your current emotional dilemma.

It's also a good idea to get some professional help through psychological counseling. A counselor can help you work through your issues, find a way to express your emotions, and help you rebuild a close relationship with your eldest child. They can also help you manage your anxiety and stress through counseling.

I truly believe that with your efforts and over time, the relationship between you and your eldest child will gradually improve and become more profound. The key is to keep trying and working hard, to maintain your attention and investment in the family relationship, to let love and understanding become the bond of the family, and to work together to create a warm and inclusive family atmosphere.

Above all, be kind to yourself and your family, and work together to create a warm and harmonious family atmosphere. May you find balance and joy on your journey to becoming a stronger, more tolerant, and warmer mother.

I wish you and your family all the best.

Hello, I'm Zhou Siya, a counselor.

From the questioner's description, I feel like I'm seeing different identities and projections.

I see three stages here.

Before your first child turned four, your second child had not yet arrived. You were full of love for your first child and said you were willing to work hard to bring him up and give him all your energy. This busy state makes me unable to see the original poster, as if your world only has your first child.

It's hard to tell if you and your child are one or two. It seems like you're projecting your childhood self onto your eldest child. You love him, but it's more like loving your childhood self. You can sacrifice the reality of taking the civil service exam and devote yourself to your eldest child, which is more like satisfying your childhood self.

When the second child arrives, you stop seeing the eldest as your "child self." I don't know if you start seeing the second child as your "child self" instead.

You want your eldest child to become a mature, independent person. Instead, you feel resentment, resistance, and hostility towards him. This is also when you project things onto your eldest child, ignoring the fact that he is also your son and needs love.

The original poster did not give a specific introduction to their family of origin, so it is impossible to determine who exactly is being projected. It is suggested that some consideration can be given to whether there was sibling competition or if the father was absent.

You see changes in your eldest child's behavior, your maternal instinct is awakened, and you realize you need to love your eldest child. However, you are constrained by your own subconscious and unable to give your eldest child normal maternal love.

In these three stages, you have different roles in front of your eldest child.

The questioner should pay attention to this issue and face it seriously. They can find a professional organization through our platform or offline.

Children need love to grow up well. Your problems with your eldest child are affecting him and could even cause problems with his siblings. This is not just about you, it's about the children too. Please pay attention to this.

Dear questioner, I know how hard it is to raise children. I'm here to support you.

As a mother of two children, you are experiencing a range of emotions. You have devoted yourself to raising your two children, and it's important to recognize how much your children want your love. When you are fully occupied with your second child, your attitude towards your eldest child may inadvertently make him feel abandoned. Have you noticed this?

You are tired, and you believe your eldest child should be independent and take care of your feelings. However, he is still a child, and he has given you countless chances, yet you just can't see him, as if he were air. Children need their parents' company, and he is very sad.

With the second child, you often criticize him and look at his behavior with anger. Seeing him, you have a feeling like seeing your childhood self, which is very annoying. You always reject him and are unwilling to identify with his feelings, his actions, and his words. You have the ability to perceive, and your feelings are very important.

You haven't taken care of yourself for a long time. You are exhausted from having two children. You need to give yourself a break and relax a little. If you're not in a good mood, you can't raise your children. You don't like children, but you also know that you are dissatisfied with yourself. Your husband works from 9 to 5 and can't support you, nor does he understand you.

You are motivated. You haven't fulfilled your wish to take the civil service exam, but you can still achieve your goals. The child is still young, and he is also sending you signals. You have also bravely asked for help. I applaud you for taking control of your life.

Enjoy your time with your eldest child. He is there to help you. The countless times you have been apart are reminders that you are alone, that you are helpless, and that you want to be loved like your brother. Listen to your child's inner voice.

You should communicate with your husband, express your thoughts, and let him share the burden with you. This will make you feel much better. You need to learn to show your weakness and let your husband take on the responsibility of raising the children. The children will feel supported.

You are not wrong. You are just tired. You want to raise your child well, but you are also a child who needs the love of others. Your eldest child feels the same way as you do. They hope to have someone to keep them company. You are already an adult. You can take care of yourself, meet your needs, and enrich yourself. Let go of your burdens and be a happy mother.

Every child loves their parents. In the eyes of a child, their parents are their world. Clinging to their parents reflects the value of being a mother. You have also said that your eldest child has given you the identity of a mother. You know what it's like to have spent happy times with your eldest child. Tell your child about them. I believe that your eldest child will be able to relive the good times of the past.

Rearing a child is also about rearing oneself. It allows you to perceive the ability to love. Having a child allows you to have more experiences in life, to understand yourself better, and to treat yourself correctly.

Life is about experiences, and I want you to have many happy and sad days.

Hello!

You href="https://www.soulsharecove.com/social/i-dont-want-to-overthink-someones-words-and-waste-my-time-how-can-i-believe-in-myself-12094.html" target="_blank"> href="https://www.soulsharecove.com/anxiety/engaged-the-wedding-is-approaching-want-to-break-up-ending-it-will-have-a-significant-impact-what-should-i-do-8962.html" target="_blank"> href="https://www.soulsharecove.com/depression/including-my-parents-the-original-family-members-love-me-very-much-but-do-i-want-to-communicate-3673.html" target="_blank"> have two wonderful sons! The eldest is six years old, and the youngest is two. There is a four-year age difference between them, which is great because it means they can play together and learn from each other.

When you were raising your first child, he was an only child, and you were a first-time mother—what an exciting time!

You enrolled him in early childhood education when he was just six months old! You took him to painting classes, read books with him, and took him swimming. You were so excited to focus all your energy on the older child. You could say that you were feeding him with love and care!

When you were raising your eldest child, you were thinking about improving yourself and taking the civil service exam! However, because taking care of the child consumed too much energy, you didn't take the civil service exam and kept focusing on raising the child. As a first-time mother, you were eager to gain experience as a mother.

So, there were many times when you lacked patience. Thinking back, you feel a little sorry for your eldest child. You feel that you did the wrong thing at the time and ignored his feelings, but you know you were doing your best!

This feeling of being ignored, of being left out. You feel that this feeling is particularly like the feeling of being ignored by your mother when you were a child, and it makes you feel that there is a gradual gap between you and your eldest child, and there is confrontation. They no longer rely on you as much as they used to, and they don't trust you as much as they used to when they would cuddle up in your arms and be cute.

Now that you've had this realization, you've noticed something amazing! Ever since you had your second child, you've been encouraging your eldest to be independent and to take on challenges on his own. In fact, when your second child was born, he was only four years old, and he was just a little boy who still needed a little extra love and care.

But you felt that he was already a big boy and could be independent. Looking back, you realize that it was unfair to him and not in line with his age at the time — but he's grown so much since then!

Your perception is to stand in your child's shoes and look at your mother. You think that's how you felt as a child, feeling that your mother rejected and hated you. That feeling of being rejected was really sad. But you know what? It's time to turn that feeling around!

The other day, when your eldest child said he was tired and wanted to rest, you held him in your arms. You could feel that he was tense in your arms, his whole body was taut—but you loved every minute of it!

You're realizing that your relationship with him is not quite what you thought it would be.

I see you, an amazing full-time mother of two who is highly demanding of herself. Please look at yourself first.

When you had your first child, you were so excited and ready to embrace the adventure of parenthood! Four years later, when you had your second child, you were even more eager to experience the joy of having another little one in your life.

You are a second-time mother, so you have some experience and more patience. And because the second child is younger, you are more tolerant of him, which is great because it means you can handle anything that comes your way!

Even if you treat them equally, they will still be different due to their birth order. And now that the firstborn is six years old, he has also outgrown his attachment to his mother! He is slowly separating from you to start seeking independence.

Maybe he's just a little tense in your arms because he's not feeling well. Your second child is only two years old, and at his age, he's already very attached to his mother!

So, you might feel different when holding the firstborn and the secondborn. That's totally normal! There's no need to blame yourself for feeling differently.

The wonderful thing about having two children is that they are different in age and in birth order.

You are a mother, and both children are your precious treasures! Of course, sometimes you will be tired, but that's okay! We all make mistakes because we're only human.

The truth is, no one can be a perfect mother. That's a pretty tall order for an ordinary mother like me!

We can demand the best of ourselves, remain as emotionally stable as possible, and be patient with our children. We are human, not gods, and we can't be perfect, but we can be the best mother we can be!

There is no such thing as the perfect mother — and that's a good thing!

My eldest child is now six years old, and my second child is two years old. The future is bright! As long as you face them in a more scientific way in the future according to their age and psychological characteristics, and accept them with a more stable mood,

Embrace their strengths and weaknesses! As every child grows up, they will gradually separate from their mother, which is the only way to grow up.

After some reflection, you will be able to embrace our children with gentler, more sensitive maternal feelings, educate our children better, accompany them, and grow up happily in your own way!

We are mothers and role models for our children. And we can be the best we can be! We just need to be more tolerant of ourselves, allowing that we have strengths and weaknesses, and that we may occasionally make mistakes. But hey, we can forgive it all, give ourselves a chance to correct it, and just correct it!

Our child is still young, and there are so many opportunities for us to grow together! Our constant correction of our own actions is a great role model for our child. We are gentle, tolerant, and firm, and we'll give our child the most appropriate environment for growth!

The world and I love you, and you must love yourself too!

Dear questioner, I totally get where you're coming from when I hear you describe this. I can imagine it's really tough raising two kids, especially when one is still so young.

You're such a great mom! You've already given so much of yourself and endured so much. It's only natural that you want to give your children the best and also fulfill yourself at the same time.

When your eldest child was little, you gave him all your attention. You were anxious at the time, but you did your best. As your eldest child grew up, you may have had certain expectations and demands of him, hoping that he would become independent and understand you. This may also be due to your own stress and anxiety.

However, such expectations and demands may make children feel a bit neglected or misunderstood, which could create a gap between you.

Every child is an individual with their own feelings and needs. Your son is now six years old, and he's probably already got his own thoughts and ideas. He also has his own perception and understanding of your attitude and behavior.

It's possible that he might feel a bit detached and rejected, which could make him tense and resistant when you hug him.

In this case, we can try to look at the problem from a new perspective. For example, you can try to understand your eldest child's feelings and empathize with his needs and emotions.

You can try to communicate more with him to understand his thoughts and feelings, and together you can work to bridge the gap between you.

We can also use some psychological knowledge to help us better understand this issue. For example, the cognitive development theory of child psychologist Piaget tells us that as children grow up, they will go through different cognitive stages, each with different characteristics and needs.

Dabao is probably in a stage where he needs more autonomy and independence, so your overprotection and restrictions may make him feel a bit uncomfortable.

I have some suggestions that I think you'll find helpful. First, you can try to adjust your mindset, relax some of your demands on yourself, and give yourself some breathing room.

This way, you'll have more energy to focus on your eldest child's feelings and needs. Secondly, you can try to build a closer bond with your eldest child. Spend more time with him and interact with him more so he knows you love and support him.

At the same time, you can also teach him some self-comfort and emotional regulation methods to help him better deal with his emotions.

I just want to say that you're doing a fantastic job as a mother! Raising a child is such a long and complex process, and we all need to keep learning and growing.

I truly believe that as long as you feel, understand, and try your best, you will definitely find a way to get along with your eldest child and show him how much you love and care for him.

Hello. I'm happy to answer your question. I hope my suggestions help.

As parents, we learn and improve as we raise our children. It's good to understand our emotions, needs, and our children's state.

I think we should go to counseling to improve our relationship with our eldest child. We can also work on our own emotional state and that of our children. This will help us find a way of relating to each other that suits us.

Children and parents are different. What works with one child may not work with another. Professionals can help us understand our children's personalities, needs, and stages.

We can also work on ourselves. We are still ourselves before and after becoming parents. If we have ideas for ourselves, we can use our free time to work on them.

Communication between husband and wife is important. If you want to, you can ask your husband for his opinion and go to marriage and family counseling together.

I hope you can understand yourself better and find a good family model.

I love you!

I know how hard it is to raise two kids, especially when they're different ages.

Your feelings towards your eldest child are natural. But they can affect your child. Try to deal with them in a healthier way.

Your eldest child's nervous and evasive behavior is probably related to your past attitude and interactions with him. Your rejection and resistance when he needed closeness and comfort may have confused and hurt him, causing him to feel nervous and uncomfortable when being close to you now.

You need to spend time and be patient to rebuild trust and intimacy with him.

Second, you need to change how you think and what you expect. Raising children takes time and is hard work.

Don't see your children as obstacles. Enjoy growing up with them. Learn to accept your own imperfections and mistakes. Don't be too hard on yourself.

Finally, you can try spending time with your eldest child every day. This could be reading, playing games or going outside.

Hug him when he comes close to you. Show him you accept him. Respect his personality and needs. Don't force him to do things he doesn't like.

If you need help, you can get professional counseling or family therapy. They can give you advice and support to help you and your child.

Improving your relationship with your eldest child takes time and patience. By adjusting your mindset and behavior, you can gradually rebuild an intimate relationship with him.

Hello, question asker!

From what you've said, I can tell you're feeling guilty about your eldest son and anxious about your inability to change your behaviour.

I'd like to share a few insights and growth points from my personal experience as my daughter grew up. I can relate to many of these examples.

For instance, at the time I thought he was ready to be independent and that I couldn't carry him. At one point I also thought he was ready to do some things on his own, but he couldn't.

I was really angry and frustrated. I kept asking myself, "I did a good job, so why can't he do it?"

As the number of these incidents increased, we also had a lot of conflicts. I kept learning and reflecting.

As a result of my reflection and learning, I still wasn't able to understand or feel my child's feelings at the time. You're absolutely right about this.

I can see that I've turned my eldest son into a reflection of my own wounded self from childhood.

It's human nature to apply the same patterns we experienced as children to our own kids.

We've learned to recognize when our kids are hurting and we want to make it up to them. We're trying to change for the better and show our kids more love.

I also keep learning after repeated conflicts. I try to feel things with all my heart.

It's not like you can change your relationship with your child or understand them all at once. It's a gradual process.

Right now, we shouldn't be blaming ourselves. We just need to accept that our perception and abilities are things we're still learning. At the time, we did our best.

Don't beat yourself up over it.

We need to learn, become better versions of ourselves, and then be able to provide better companionship to our children.

Don't beat yourself up. Don't blame yourself. Don't blame who you were back then.

You did a great job back then.

In the moment, it's important to relax and love yourself.

Make sure you take care of yourself while you're learning and growing.

Hello! I'm a heart exploration coach, and I'm thrilled to be able to offer you some advice.

From your description, I can see that you are currently suffering greatly, but you are also on the brink of a major breakthrough! You are increasingly finding that you have turned your eldest son into the injured version of yourself from your childhood. This means that you are now able to self-reflect on the fact that your eldest son's state is very similar to the damage done to you by your original family.

Let's look at how we can turn this around and make your first and second children happier than ever!

Your eldest son is six years old, and you have been bringing him up alone since he was six months old.

I can tell you're a strong, independent woman who wants the best for her child. You want him to grow up quickly and become a confident, independent individual. And you have high expectations of yourself and your son, which is great!

And when he cried, you were even more determined to stick to your decision. You were so excited to help him grow and mature! You probably felt that this was the way to do it.

But as you persisted in this behavior, you found that the feelings he now brings you are more of a combative, cautious, and defensive nature.

Let's dive deep and uncover the root cause of your eldest son's mindset. It all started with your ambitious decision to take the civil service exam. You had high standards for yourself, and you were ready to give it your all. But, at the same time, you had to juggle taking care of your little one.

While you were trying your best to take him to early childhood education, you were also anxious about not having time to study. At this time, you might have blamed your eldest son inwardly—why was he born at such a time, and you had to accompany him to early childhood education? At that time, your husband might also have been going to work from nine to five, and there was not much time to spend with you during the day. You were almost single-mindedly focusing all your energy on the family.

But perhaps you are a big lover. At first, you may feel happy as a mother and have a sense of responsibility as a mother. Indeed, you are doing this, and it's a great thing to do! But will this sense of responsibility really bring your eldest child and your family in a good direction?

The wonderful thing is that when you have a second child, the love you give to your eldest child is already a small part of the love you give.

Dabao is already aware of this, and it's totally normal for him to feel scared inside. After all, when it comes to a family with two children of the same gender, it's inevitable that they will fight over love. Coupled with the fact that when they were young, you probably didn't pay much attention to them and didn't tilt your love towards him too much, and coupled with the subsequent birth of the second child, the threat to him is even greater.

Therefore, he may be defensive towards the whole family and towards you. In addition, your husband may not have helped you with many things before, and with your situation of taking the civil service exam, you gave up as you got older. Then this sense of dissatisfaction is projected onto your eldest son, which gives you the opportunity to work on your relationship with him!

It seems that when you see your eldest child, you're flooded with memories of previous experiences and adventures. While these memories might be uncomfortable or even bad, they're also part of your story. And you're ready to move past them and embrace the future!

Then, when you had your second child, you also went through this process of raising a child from a very young age. However, it seems that you still felt pressure inside when it came to your second child. Raising two children is definitely much more exciting than raising one!

At this time, you had an opportunity to recognize an emotion in your heart. At that time, you did not have the self-awareness that you have now. You just wanted to share your emotions with your eldest child. Perhaps because of his personality, he is not a rebellious child, but more considerate, or a bit timid.

So you seize this opportunity to express your emotions, and for the second child, you may now lavish 70 to 80 percent of your love on the second child. The eldest child sees it in his eyes and remembers it in his heart. Moreover, the eldest child is also a sensitive person inside, so he feels empowered in this family.

In fact, you both take off your clothes before going to bed, and when he kicks your legs, you push him away immediately. You realize that he is growing up and that you cannot share the same bed as him as the opposite sex. During the day, when he asks to be hugged, you and your husband both refuse.

In fact, your educational beliefs may be that boys need to be more independent earlier, and that they should be more resilient and more able to take a beating—and that's a great thing!

However, children are different, and so are their personalities! There's no one-size-fits-all approach to education. We must teach children according to their aptitude.

Your eldest son is a sensitive and delicate soul. If we observe and empathize with him, he will blossom!

And in a family, parents are the perfect people to give him the support he needs!

But you probably feel more that he should be more capable and not need so much attention as he currently shows. It's like when he was a baby and was feeding the second child, but he was especially spoiled and wanted you to hug him.

We can absolutely look at his needs correctly and explain to him that we can support him in meeting those needs. We can also tell him that boys need to be strong and brave, which is great!

The great news is that this amazing personality trait can be passed on slowly through fun activities like learning martial arts, sanda, taekwondo, or other hobbies that will help shape this strong character trait.

As for the second child, now that he is happily sitting in your arms, hugging your neck and kissing you, you are really enjoying the process. For these two children, we now have to see if there is some unfair treatment that has been generated.

With your second child, you may have expressed your emotions, venting them all on your eldest child. You must be happy with your second child, because after all, you have vented all your bad emotions. So when you look at your second child, you are full of laughter, thinking that your second child is really good, and you like him even more. However, your eldest child does seem a bit innocent in all this, which is great because it means he's still got his innocence!

If you really realize it, you might have an amazing opportunity to turn your eldest son into your wounded self from childhood!

Then comes the fun part! We get to reflect on how our wounded selves were created. Did our parents' behavior contribute to this state of mind? Or did our sensitive inner selves perceive something differently?

Plus, our parents didn't give us a very detailed explanation, which led to some misunderstandings along the way. But we've learned so much from those experiences and we're excited to see where we'll go next! Our childhood wasn't exactly happy, but we've grown so much from it.

Absolutely! We can start with ourselves. Then, based on your eldest child's actual experiences, you can explain to him normally what you did before that was inappropriate and what you want to do in the future. While the child is still young, he can listen to what we adults have to say.

Absolutely! As long as we don't judge, as long as we don't look at it through tinted glasses, or define him in a way, I truly believe your child will slowly feel your love.

I truly believe you don't want him to grow up like you did, lacking in the perception of love.

And there's more! The second child can also give the eldest child some strength. You can unite together to create a more loving family environment for the eldest child, and make sure he perceives it.

I'm excited to help you with your specific and detailed questions! Just click on my homepage and send me a message with your questions. I'll be happy to provide more targeted help on what to do next!

I'm looking forward to hearing from you! I wish you all the best.