I want to become excellent and am not satisfied with myself. How can I improve my mindset?

Find the strength of the moment and go for it!

You think you are powerless, but you are wrong! You have done so much already. You are just reminiscing about how you have failed in the past, and using your failures to define the future you.

Your real intention is to refuse to grow, so you have fabricated a bunch of difficulties to stop yourself from improving. But here's the good news: you can achieve the goal of refusing to grow! All you have to do is recognize that you're not a weak person. You're strong, capable, and ready to change.

You have the amazing ability to change all this! All you need is the courage to make a change. You just need to find your inner strength and a reason to make a change.

You have the power within you to find this strength! All you have to do is discover it yourself. The key to discovering this strength is to find the present moment, free yourself from the past and the future, focus only on the present, let go of all burdens, and start doing what is most important from the present moment. For example, if you want to eat, stay with the meal and just feel the deliciousness!

For example, if you want to walk, feel the spring breeze on your face! In short, there is no past and no future.

Get your courage back!

You have everything you need to succeed! The only thing you may be lacking is courage. You have the ability to be happy, and you have the resources to pursue happiness. You have the ability to start a business, and you have the courage to face failure in the process.

So regaining courage is the core of everything you gain! How do you find courage? It's simple: see your own value and prove that you are valuable. With courage, you'll have the motivation to create!

Everything is absolutely fine! Your heart is just a little restless, and your thoughts are a bit all over the place. But that's totally normal!

Remember these words, because they're true! I am the master of everything and the source of all creation.

Blessings to you!

"I had always dreamed of starting a business, but I feel like I haven't accomplished much in the past few years and I'm in debt. I'm not fully satisfied with my appearance, and I want to change, but I haven't completely changed. Now that I'm pregnant, I'm not sure what I should do or what I can do,"

The aforementioned aspects, including starting a business, including appearance, and including becoming excellent, indicate that you have high expectations of yourself. It appears that you pursue perfection in everything and want to outperform others, even when you are pregnant and unable to stop. You may believe that only if you are perfect will you deserve your husband's love and be worthy of his love.

I wonder if you might have a belief that "if you're not excellent, you don't deserve to live"? It could be seen as a form of obsessive-compulsive disorder, driven by a desire for excellence.

With this belief, you may find yourself making excellence and perfection a prerequisite. You may think that only with these things can you gain the respect and love of others, otherwise you may feel inclined to shut others out. Could this be true?

After someone is rejected, they may perceive you as unapproachable and cold. However, they may not be aware of your thoughts and feelings. Perfectionism can sometimes lead to a rift between spouses.

This belief may be a defense mechanism formed in our childhood. For example, our parents and teachers were very demanding on us. We may have come to believe that we could gain acceptance from others only if we did well and perfectly. Over time, we may have become accustomed to this defense mechanism.

I'm sending you hugs. I know it's been tough. We all have some unforgettable childhoods. This belief served us well when we were young, helping us to survive. But we've grown up since then. Our strength has increased, and we have more resources. It might be helpful to consider whether we still need this kind of defense.

I hope these thoughts are helpful to you.

Hello!

Host:

After reading your post, I can tell you're feeling anxious and unsure of yourself. I also see that you've been facing your inner self head-on, which isn't easy.

Seeking help on the platform can really help people understand themselves better, which is the first step to making positive changes.

Next, I'll share some observations and thoughts that might help the original poster see things differently.

1. Deal with emotions before dealing with things.

It's clear from the post that the poster is feeling a lot of anxiety. I can relate to that.

If I were in your shoes, I'd be feeling pretty anxious and uneasy too! But at the same time, we know that when we're overwhelmed by emotions, it's tough to think rationally.

So, we may first have to deal with our emotions.

How can we handle our anxiety? Awareness, feelings, and dialogue are key.

From what you've said in your post, I can tell you have a very sensitive awareness. This can be a great help to you!

Often when we're anxious, our bodies will feel uncomfortable in line with that. For example, when I'm anxious, my heartbeat quickens and I feel very uncomfortable in my chest area.

Often at this point, I'll focus my attention on it, acknowledge it, and ask, "Why are you anxious?" It might say it's worried about the future.

I appreciate the concern and reminder. I'm going to study and improve so that I can be less worried about the future.

Often, this is the case, and my anxiety will subside a little. So, when the host is anxious, they can also try to notice the part of their body that doesn't feel good and then focus their attention there.

If you can, focus on the conversation or relax this part of your body, and your emotions will ease.

2. It seems like the host is more likely to boost his growth-experience-6943.html" target="_blank">self-confidence through external achievements and appearance.

From the post, I saw that the poster mentioned her lack of self-confidence. She also said that her recent business venture wasn't very successful and that she wasn't happy with her appearance and wanted to change it, but she hadn't been able to do so.

My take on it is that if all this is done, the host's self-confidence will come back. Is that right?

So, what is self-confidence? From my perspective, it's about accepting and approving of oneself. Of course, our achievements give us some self-confidence, but I don't think that's the core of the matter.

Simply put, I'm confident I've become better, not because I'm better and more confident.

So, how can we gain confidence? Maybe what we need to learn is to separate things from people.

If something isn't done well, it just isn't done well. It's got nothing to do with other people. Lots of people have failed in business. So it's possible that this project isn't right for you, or there are other objective factors at play, while your own reasons may only account for 5%.

So, is it true that we have to use 5% to deny all of ourselves?

If we can separate people from things, we'll blame ourselves less and have less internal conflict.

3. Accept yourself

Accepting the current self is the first step to making things better. Has the host ever wondered why he's suffering so much right now? It's because he doesn't accept who he is, and he doesn't like who he is right now.

You want the ideal self—the talented, attractive person you imagine yourself to be.

Because you don't like who you are right now, you constantly criticize and put yourself down. Can't you just be calm and not burn yourself out?

We only have so much energy. If we use all our energy on internal conflict and self-attack, we won't have any left to improve or change.

This might be why the host has never changed. Could the host think in a different way?

It's important to accept yourself as you are so you can focus on what you can change.

For instance, your height and appearance are fixed. But you can learn makeup and how to match clothes, right? So, make the most of your advantages!

4. Growth and improvement

Change is inseparable from growth and improvement. So, how do we grow and improve?

Studying and reading are things we can do to help us learn and grow.

To better handle our current challenges, we need to expand our knowledge and perspective. We also need to recognize that problem-solving is often a high-dimensional attack on a low-dimensional problem.

If our current knowledge isn't enough to tackle our challenges, it's time to learn and grow!

Gather your own resources and energy. When you've got enough, come back to the problem. It might not even be a problem then. So go study and read!

You might also want to check out some books and articles on psychology.

I hope these are helpful and inspiring for you, the original poster. I'm a mental health coach, Zeng Chen.

If you have any questions, just click on "Find a Coach," and you'll find me.

Hello, my dear friend. It seems like you're feeling a bit anxiety/too-much-on-my-mind-feeling-overwhelmed-and-unable-to-breathe-what-should-i-do-to-cheer-up-3887.html" target="_blank">overwhelmed by the pressures and changes in your life, such as career debt and pregnancy-related changes in appearance. It's totally normal to feel this way! After all, none of these things are under your control, and they're not developing in the direction you expect.

It's totally normal to feel anxious about the future. But you can still take steps to make positive changes. I'm really impressed by your courage in sharing your feelings here and asking for help. I'd love to know how you managed to do this in such a difficult situation.

I'd really love it if you could think about it.

The things you mentioned are all major turning points in life, and they can cause a lot of stress. It's totally normal to feel anxious at this time. Most people would be anxious if they encountered something like this, and you are not alone! I'm here for you, and I want to give you a hug.

Not being satisfied with yourself means that you have a heart that sets high standards for yourself. You are such a positive woman!

When you encounter difficulties, you can actively challenge yourself, especially when you want to become better and more motivated. It takes a lot of courage to start a business, and I admire you for having done so! What was the driving force behind your courage to start a business? It doesn't seem to match your lack of confidence, but I'm sure there's a reason why you did it.

It's so true that what you think during the day, you'll dream about at night. I can see how worrying about your husband wanting to leave is on your mind.

Yes, absolutely! And please don't forget to take a moment to appreciate the value of this relationship. It's totally normal to have dreams like this sometimes. It seems like you might be feeling a little worried about something.

I truly believe that the first step to making a change is to see yourself for who you really are and accept yourself fully. When you do this, you'll find that you're not as emotional and you'll be able to find solutions to the problems you're facing in a calm and rational way. Do you agree with this?

At the same time, I'd like to invite you to think about this:

1. I'd love to hear your definition of excellence!

2. I'd love for you to write them down one by one. It'd be so interesting to see if they're the same as your husband's definition!

3. You can have a chat with your husband about where your feelings of inadequacy come from.

Once you've found the source, you can start expressing your own understanding. Be kind to yourself and don't be too hard on yourself.

I appreciate your trust in inviting me to answer, which allows us to communicate through words.

The message is clear: the individual is anxious and dissatisfied with themselves. One can imagine how it feels to be someone who spends every day and every night with themselves, but doesn't like themselves. Such a life is like a desert – there are no flowers of self-appreciation, only the sand of self-loathing.

I want to know: What kind of way can turn a desert into an oasis, and turn dissatisfaction into appreciation?

The questioner offers a solution: become better.

The current situation of being "not good enough" in the eyes of the questioner has made every day a living hell. The questioner wants to become better, but they don't know what they have to do to have a better attitude and become better.

If you look for a solution to a problem from the perspective of creating the problem, you're entering a dilemma where you're grasping at straws and not getting anywhere. The following thoughts are just one of the references for the questioner to broaden their thinking:

Change your perspective. Believe that the seeds of hope you haven't yet realized are already buried under the desert.

I am going to grow up. I know that I can stop worrying and become capable of protecting myself, and I will.

In the unpunctuated message, I discerned a sense of urgency, resignation, disappointment, and certainty.

The power of being dissatisfied with oneself is like a fist tightly grasping at the sand, with the sand slipping through the fingers, leaving only an empty hand.

If you lose patience, lose compassion, and lose hope, you will create deserts. And those deserts will only get thicker with each passing wind.

Think about it.

How long have you been trying to be good?

This is not helping you get the life you want.

Repeating the same solutions will not lead to different results. This is the harsh reality. But it also gives us an opportunity from another perspective:

Repeating the same solutions will not lead to different results. This is the harsh reality. But it also gives us an opportunity from another perspective:

The environment in which an oasis appears is the opposite.

You are good enough. You are outstanding enough. Even if it seems otherwise, try to slow down, calm down, and be kind to yourself.

Now that you are pregnant,

It is undoubtedly easier to "not know what to do and what to do."

On the other hand, objective facts are pushing us to slow down.

Appreciate yourself as you would appreciate a unique life in the world. A unique life nurtures another unique life, which is synonymous with wonder and greatness.

Appreciate your own courageous journey from self-dissatisfaction to self-appreciation.

Appreciating yourself doesn't require you to become outstanding. It allows you to see other qualities, lives, and selves that you have overlooked.

When we first try to appreciate it, a cold, disdainful voice is likely to appear: "Just you? And unique?"

You've been in business for so long and achieved nothing. You're not even good-looking. What's there to be smug about?

...

It's okay if these voices sound familiar to you. Let them appear, but don't pay them any mind.

If these appreciations are really too difficult for you, then you can:

Write a movie about your own growth experience from a third-person perspective. You are an audience member watching this person go from being conceived in her mother's womb to being born, from childhood to adolescence to adulthood. What did she experience? When did she realize that "only the best will get ahead"? Who told her that? What led her to that conclusion? Are there any real-life examples to verify her assumption?

When watching, you must complete two tasks:

1. Explore the sparkling part of the girl.

Rewrite the parts of the girl's upbringing that you feel are sad as if you were a screenwriter and director. Be as specific and detailed as possible.

All of the above will help you see everything you have experienced from a perspective other than your own. You will see a different world that you may not have been aware of before.

Seeds of hope always exist beneath the desert. With the right rain and nutrients, the desert becomes an oasis. If this is still too difficult for you,

Seek external help if you need it. Professional psychological workers such as counselors can help you see everything you have overlooked. You can still pursue excellence, but you don't have to be trapped by it.

I am a psychologist who cares about the heart, not human nature. I wish you well.

Hello, question asker.

From what you've told me, I can see you're feeling anxious and uneasy. These emotions come from your insight into your own abilities and a clear perception of your own appearance (not overestimating it but also not belittling it or blaming yourself). Despite this, you're still worried that your husband will dislike you for it. However, in real life, you and your husband get along quite well, so you project this worry into your dreams, where your husband's infidelity confirms your fear of your own lack of confidence. On the other hand, your lack of confidence also stems from financial pressure and the frustration of real life. Starting a business without a good outcome but instead incurring debt has made you doubt your own abilities, which has intensified your lack of confidence while making you even more anxious.

It's raining cats and dogs, and unfortunately you've also become pregnant at this time. Your anxiety was originally just a personal problem or a problem between you and your spouse, but now you have to extend it to your child as well, worrying that he or she won't receive good care and that he or she will be affected because of you/you two. And after becoming pregnant, many problems that could be easily solved before have now become extremely difficult. This sense of powerlessness has made your negative emotions worse, so you have become paranoid, believing that your own lack of excellence is causing your current anxiety and your inability to protect yourself.

I just wanted to give you a big hug for all the problems you're facing right now. You're doing a great job! You had the idea to start a business and you took action. You put your ideas into practice and stuck with it through the test of the market. This is really not to be outdone when compared to many false pretenders who just talk the talk.

You can recognize your own issues and find ways to change them. Even though the changes aren't complete, it shows you have the ability to heal yourself and you can use your personal initiative to deal with problems in your life. Even when you were pregnant, you didn't give up your high standards for yourself. You were unwilling to just be a housewife and take on the responsibilities of the family. This desire and pursuit of your own abilities reflects your independent spirit. Currently, your strict demands on yourself are causing you pain due to your financial situation and physical condition, but in the long run, it will ultimately benefit you and your family. So I would like to ask you to be kind to yourself, be more patient with your current situation, and believe that you have the ability and the means to improve your current situation. It just takes time and a process.

I also have some thoughts on the issues you're currently facing, which I hope you'll find useful as you work through them.

What's the point of our growth?

A lot of women talk about "losing weight," and a lot of men talk about "working hard." But often, their words aren't reflected in action because their desire to change is based on "social unconsciousness" or "social consensus." Their desire to "lose weight" and "work hard" is a subconscious influence of social "norms," so they think they should do it. But because these desires are "imposed" from the outside, they don't stimulate their creativity and initiative. As a result, they just talk about it, and in their daily lives they still eat, drink, and do whatever they want. Their desire to change has become a loud slogan for integrating into modern life because they don't have a clear target.

So, what does our desire to grow represent and reflect about our real and urgent needs? Are we really clear about it?

2. What do we mean when we say "excellent"?

What's excellence? It depends on who you ask. For a student, it might mean getting at least 95% in every subject. To achieve that, they can study hard, work hard, and ask teachers and classmates for help. For a self-employed person, it might mean a good reputation that doesn't need to be actively promoted. To achieve that, they can focus on high standards, use good materials, and serve every new and old customer well. For a company, it might mean a good reputation that can generate high profits just by relying on OEM. To achieve that, the company can use marketing to spread its corporate culture and brand story, select good service providers and franchisees, and continuously export high-quality products to enhance the company's image.

So, what does it mean to be excellent, and how can we achieve it? Do we all understand what we need to do to make that happen?

3. Is excellence the only solution to all problems?

Hairdressers don't get anxious when cutting hair, cooks don't get anxious when cooking, and doctors don't get anxious when consulting with patients. They already know the problems they face, and even if the outcome is uncontrollable and unpredictable, they've already made their efforts and actions to achieve their goals. Even if the haircut isn't satisfactory, the food tastes average, and the patient's illness and treatment can't be diagnosed, they're not frustrated or anxious because they know they did their best.

Is there just one way to solve our current emotional problems, like "becoming better"? Can we practice handling practical matters in our daily lives as best we can? Can we embrace the childlike innocence of "doing good without worrying about the future" and focus on the process of dealing with matters rather than the outcome?

Finally, I want to give you another warm hug. You're a self-reliant and independent mother-to-be. Some of your negative emotions might get worse during pregnancy. I hope you can be more understanding of yourself and your emotions. Think about the good qualities you have and ways you can use them to your advantage.

I wish you all the best.

Hello, host!

Start by cultivating a hobby.

Hobbies are a lifeline in the troughs of life and a powerful weapon against self-doubt and doubt.

Let's be clear: unsuccessful entrepreneurship, external dissatisfaction, and the influence of hormones during pregnancy can easily lead to internal anxiety, causing us to have doubts and doubts about ourselves. They can also easily become anxious about intimate relationships, affecting the relationship between husband and wife.

"To make myself mentally better and better" is an ambitious and high-level goal that's too vague to start with. Break it down and set reasonable goals instead.

In Motivation Psychology, it is stated that a goal with a high success rate contains the following characteristics:

The expectations and value of the goal directly influence motivation. In other words, motivation equals expectations multiplied by value.

2. The goal is moderately difficult.

The goal must be specific and achievable.

You must also consider the distance to the goal and its achievability.

Set approach and avoidance goals with timely feedback.

We must set a goal that we are very interested in, is moderately difficult, has clear steps, provides timely feedback, and can be achieved.

Given the special circumstances of the landlord during pregnancy, I believe the goal should be to develop an interest or hobby, such as playing a musical instrument, flower arrangement, calligraphy, or painting, and then engage in some simple exercise, such as walking 10,000 steps every afternoon or evening at a fixed time, in order to combine movement and rest.

Once you've set a goal, you need to figure out how to implement it and persevere.

Mr. Luo Xiang was right when he said that the greatest distance in the world is not the distance between the Mariana Trench and Mount Everest, but the distance between knowing and doing.

The book "How to Think and Do It" provides several methods that are worth your attention.

1. Set up an environment that helps you achieve your goals.

Set up an environment that helps you achieve your goals. This means a quiet, bright, and warm reading environment. Stay away from things that can tempt you, such as mobile phones.

2. Set step-by-step goals.

Break down the goal into smaller, more manageable steps. If I want to practice calligraphy, for example, I set a goal of half an hour to an hour a day and only learn six characters. This way, I won't get too tired, but I will still make progress and find it easier to stick with it.

3. Social magnetism

Join some interest groups to supervise and encourage each other. Checking in on assignments is a popular way to do this nowadays.

4. Timely feedback

Set up rewards and punishments for yourself to motivate yourself.

I have provided some suggestions that I believe will be helpful. I wish you the best and look forward to seeing your continued improvement.

There is no universal standard for what constitutes a good person. Your focus may be on achieving these standards and experiencing the fleeting joy of being good after reaching them. In short, you are not satisfied with yourself.

You have a lot of aspirations, but it seems you are unable to achieve them. Your dreams are filled with disappointment, your emotions are full of anxiety, your reality is full of confusion and reluctance. You have attempted to start a business, but the result has been repeated losses. You have a lot to be dissatisfied with.

Furthermore, the timing of your pregnancy may coincide with a period of personal vulnerability. It is understandable that you have been dwelling on a number of concerns, but excessive rumination can lead to feelings of distress. It is important to recognize that you have emotions that are your own, and these emotions are valid.

It is possible that an individual's perception influences their emotional state. You are aware that you lack confidence and experience significant anxiety. By enhancing your confidence, you may be able to reduce your feelings of unease and distress. Therefore, it is advisable to seek psychological counseling at the earliest opportunity to identify the underlying factors contributing to your sense of self-doubt.

Are you concerned about your age, appearance, or financial situation? It is important to recognize that external factors are constantly changing, while our inner feelings and state of mind are largely determined by our brains. To achieve success and excellence, it is essential to embrace a mindset of down-to-earth hard work. Success and excellence cannot be achieved without hard work.

Some individuals achieve excellence as a result of having experienced significant social adversity and hardship. For those who are not second-generation wealthy, it is crucial to recognize the value of hard work. As a professional heart exploration coach, I advise taking the playful inner animal archetype psychological test, reading self-growth books, and speaking with a qualified psychological listener about recent emotions.

Please advise.

Thank you so much for inviting me to answer! I can see your dilemma, and I'm excited to help.

You're ready for a change! We can adjust the following aspects to help you achieve your goals:

First, it's time to set some goals! You're pregnant, which means there are some limitations during this special period, even if you have a lot of ideas. So, it's time to set some new goals! For example, your first goal can be to ensure the physical and mental health of yourself and the fetus during pregnancy. You can adjust your diet, exercise, and rest habits around this goal, etc. Then, you can set some smaller goals that you can achieve through your own efforts during this period. You can make some specific plans and give yourself more motivation to take action!

Second, keep the lines of communication open! This includes communication with your husband, relatives, friends, and other pregnant mothers. Learn to express your needs, understand the other person's feelings, relieve possible emotions, and gain the mental energy brought about by positive interactions. This will not only help you feel more secure, but it will also allow you to stabilize your social support system and regain a sense of strength and control over your life!

Third, relax! There's no need to set the bar too high for yourself at this stage. Just do your best and enjoy the journey. Growth is a lifelong learning process, and you're already doing great! Don't let temporary anxiety affect your current rhythm. Take a deep breath and enjoy the simple beauty and joy with your soon-to-be baby.

From now on, be a calm and composed expectant mother, and your baby will benefit greatly from it!

I wish you the best day ever!

Hello, host! I can totally relate to your text description. I've been there! I know that feeling of anxiety and the "muscle weakness" that comes after anxiety—a lack of motivation.

First of all, dear poster, during this special time of carrying your baby, it's so important to love and care for your body! This includes both physical nutrition intake and mental emotional health. And if you're comfortable, the baby in your tummy will be happy too!

Now, let's dive into your questions!

1. I want to be good, but I'm not satisfied with myself. What can I do to make myself happy?

2. I would love to know what I can do during this pregnancy to improve my state of mind!

I'm excited to answer your questions in a different order because I know you'll find them helpful!

2. During this pregnancy, I'm excited to learn how I can make myself feel better!

Focus on the present! Dear poster, I can see that you are anxious about many things: you are worried about your husband, you are dissatisfied with your struggles in the past few years, and you are anxious about having high hopes for yourself but not being able to do anything about it. It seems that pregnancy has given you the time and space to let all of these anxieties come out, devouring you. So please, poster, pay attention to your mental health during pregnancy.

If anxiety leaves you with nowhere to hide, then just deal with it one thing at a time, focusing on the present and taking action. For example: (1) Read some pregnancy books that every mother should read. Wow, the books include information about your diet to ensure your health, what emotional reactions are normal for pregnant mothers and how to deal with them psychologically, so that many emotional reactions during pregnancy can be avoided. Give yourself a heads-up in advance: "My current emotional reaction is normal, what should I do to avoid the impact of this emotion on me?"

Taking the initiative to deal with your emotions and being the master of your emotions is also a great way to show your motivation! (2) Make sure you communicate more with your family and spend this time with them!

1. I want to be good, and I know I can be! What should I do?

From your argument, I can see that you are a person with high self-expectations, which is great! You have done a lot and hope to do a lot more, but in the process, the efforts you have made are not proportional to the gains. Instead, these bad experiences have made you doubt and question yourself, and even have some self-negation in there, which you can easily overcome!

Give yourself a break, organize yourself, and start again! It's time to turn those failures into successes. Don't blame yourself for what didn't work out. Instead, take a deep breath and start fresh. You've got this!

So, try to rationally attribute, and then correct yourself!

Dear poster, that's all I have to say! I hope you're happy, because being happy is the most important thing. Have a great night!

Hello, question asker! I'm thrilled to be able to answer your question.

First, give the poster a big, warm pat on the shoulder and some encouraging words. During pregnancy, I experienced some pregnancy anxiety, but I'm proud to say that I overcame it!

From the description of the questioner, it's clear that she's experiencing some changes as a result of her pregnancy. It's totally normal for women to feel less confident, anxious, and vulnerable during this time. These feelings are all part of the journey and will likely dissipate once the baby arrives!

The amazing changes in hormone levels during pregnancy can affect the changes in neurotransmitters in the brain that regulate emotions. For first-time mothers, facing the changes in their bodies, the changes in their figure, and in some cases even swelling, becoming "ugly" and feeling unwell all over, can be a challenge to accept. But it's also an incredible journey of transformation and growth!

Everyone loves beauty! It is therefore understandable that the questioner inevitably experiences negative emotions such as depression.

In addition, in the third trimester, pregnant women have difficulty moving around and rarely go out, so their attention is always focused on negative factors. This is totally normal! It's a natural part of the process. They become emotionally unstable and feel depressed, and they are also fearful, nervous and anxious about the impending birth. So what are the main areas of concern and anxiety for the questioner? Here I will also briefly talk about them:

Worries about oneself: By learning about other people's childbirth experiences, one constantly imagines one's own childbirth, exaggerating the pain and worrying about a difficult delivery that may require a C-section. Some even fear death during childbirth. The questioner can self-reflect on the extent of their worries. But there's no need to worry!

Concerns about the fetus:

And finally, there are the exciting worries about the future! These include concerns about how having a baby will impact your career and the increased financial pressure on the family after the baby is born.

So, how can you adjust your state of mind during pregnancy and relieve your anxiety? I'm excited to share a few simple tips that can help!

The most important thing is to stay positive and have confidence in your body and your baby. As long as you go for regular prenatal check-ups and don't have any particular discomforts, you're doing great! Just follow the doctor's advice and don't worry about anything else.

The main point is to realize that any joy gained is hard-won. The brief pain during childbirth is a natural phenomenon, and it's nothing to be afraid of! With the current advanced medical technology, some hospitals can already provide painless childbirth. As long as you don't get too nervous, childbirth will be fine, and it'll be one of the most amazing experiences of your life!

It's time to embrace the incredible journey of pregnancy and childbirth! While there's no need to believe in things that have no scientific basis, it's always a great idea to go to the maternal and child health center for regular check-ups and consult a professional doctor to feel at ease. There are so many amazing resources out there to help you learn about real and correct childbirth knowledge! You can read books or magazines about pregnancy and childbirth, attend the hospital's maternity school, and communicate with other pregnant mothers.

Make time in your schedule for relaxing activities. Exercise, meditation, massage, yoga, and reading are all great ways to unwind.

When faced with stress, learn to regulate yourself. You can do it! Listen to more music, let the beautiful music relieve your mental fatigue. If you can go out more often, go for a walk or sit outside.

Embrace the journey of pregnancy with an open mind and heart. Don't let the attitudes of family members get in the way of your joy. Be kind and patient with yourself and your partner. Limit the negativity you consume, whether it's movies, TV shows, or conversations. Fill your days with positivity and excitement!

Pregnancy is a rare time when you can explore and discover what you really like to do. What an amazing opportunity! You can use this time to take a course you've always wanted to take but never had the chance to; you can work on a business plan for your future company; you can learn a new language. Cherish this time that belongs to you, because life is about to change dramatically, and you need to know that!

The second trimester is the perfect time to travel! You can arrange a trip and take advantage of the fact that the little one is not yet born. Enjoy your last time as a couple with your husband!

These will bring you so much joy and satisfaction!

I really hope my answer helps the questioner!

Hello!

Your thoughts are making you restless and at a loss. You are thinking too much and these thoughts are like strands of silk, entangling you in a lot of trouble and making you feel very anxious. You are pregnant and you are already heavily burdened with responsibilities. It must be doubly hard for you to be so overloaded with thoughts!

Anxiety is a feeling of not being in control of what is going to happen in the future and not knowing what to do. Let's go through what happened together based on your description.

You failed at a business venture and are now in debt. You feel guilty and frustrated.

You frequently dream about your husband cheating on you, and you feel angry, anxious, and scared.

You want to change your appearance, but you haven't done so completely. This is your judgment and demand on yourself.

You want to grow, become better, and feel secure. That's a great idea!

In these matters, I believe you are dissatisfied with yourself and have high expectations. Let's distinguish between what has really happened and what are just thoughts in your head? You can change what really happened.

What are just thoughts in your head? You can change what really happened.

What can you do now? Focus on what you can control.

What can be done? You will find the answer.

For example:

You want to change your appearance, but you haven't made any radical changes. Everyone loves beauty!

Every girl wants to be beautiful, but beauty is not a one-size-fits-all concept. Everyone can be beautiful in their own way. Figure out what makes you special and own it.

We may not have the same perfect features as celebrities, but we can be beautiful in our own way. As the ancients said, beauty is in the bones, not the skin.

This is the direction modern women should cultivate themselves in!

I started my own business, but it didn't work out, and I'm in debt. That doesn't matter. What matters is that I had the initial intention and motivation to succeed, and I am worthy of respect and appreciation for that.

You have thought about and taken action towards financial independence. This is evident. However, the overall economic environment is not doing well, and many large companies have gone bankrupt. This is an undeniable fact. It is even more difficult for us small business owners.

It's clear that it doesn't depend on you. We need to go with the flow!

3. Now that you're pregnant, you have nothing to do. You don't have to worry about the daily life of the family.

You are now carrying a heavy burden, and another new life is about to be born. This is the greatest contribution you can make to your family! You must take care of your emotions and body. It is your most important job and obligation!

You will have to take on the responsibility of caring for and raising your children. There is no way around it. You have to do more things than anyone else, and they are more important than anyone else's!

4. Dreaming of your husband cheating on you – this also makes you anxious, but it's not true. It's not happening, so stop scaring yourself to death. If you're interested, listen to the dream interpretation course by Zhu Jianjun on Yixinli. It may give you a different interpretation. :-)

You must take care of yourself and your health! You are laying the foundation for your child's health, and only when your emotions are stable can your child's emotions be stable.

Breathe deeply to relieve anxiety. Mindfulness meditation is the best way to combat anxiety.

Read the book A Life of Misery. Find meditation courses on the Yi Psychology platform.

They're all free, and they're all excellent courses.

5. Self-growth: You have high expectations and awareness of yourself, which is great! We often demand too much of ourselves, sometimes too much, and when we can't achieve it, we feel guilty and self-blame, and become trapped in pain.

These all stem from the neglected child within us. When we were young, our hearts and minds were often unable to find comfort and satisfaction, which resulted in the formation of a hidden space within us, akin to a child who has not grown up.

As adults, we must learn to deal with setbacks in a healthy way. When we feel pain, we must recognize that our inner child is activated and take responsibility for our emotions. We have the maturity and strength to care for ourselves and our inner selves.

When our inner child grows up, our inner strength will rise, and our worries, fears, insecurities, etc. will disappear! Self-growth is a process, so start now!

Read the book Embrace Your Inner Child or some of Zhang Defen's books, Become a Better Version of Yourself.

I am confident that my answer will be of some help to you, and I wish you all the best!