Is it wrong to curse a friend who refused to save me when I was gravely ill?

Hello, I'm Zhang Qi, and I'm going to give you some help and warmth with my answer. You have every right to feel the way you do.

When faced with difficulties and stress, people react differently. Some choose to escape, while others choose to support, depending on their experiences and personalities. Your heterosexual friend's actions may not be malicious; he may simply have a different way of dealing with the situation.

You did nothing wrong. You have the right to express your feelings and the right to seek help when you need it.

Your opposite-sex friend may not have realized your needs or may not have been able to help for some reason. This does not make his behavior correct. In a relationship, if one party does not receive support when they need it, the relationship may not be healthy.

The reaction of your other friends when you got sick does not mean they don't care about you. They may have different ways of expressing care and support, or they may not know how to handle the situation.

Communication is crucial right now. Talk to them about how you feel and tell them what you need.

You have the right to seek treatment and support to recover your health. It is not your fault that you are depressed and in poor physical condition.

Don't blame yourself for the actions of others. You are not at fault. Be kind to yourself and seek professional help and support.

You are not alone. Many people have encountered similar situations and have found ways to resolve them. You will find a way to resolve yours.

Hello!

You think the boy you are sick with is infectious. He is your friend and you have a good impression of him. However, he is also indifferent, which disappoints you.

Another friend didn't care when I was sick and went to celebrate someone else's birthday.

I understand. You've invested a lot in friendships and romances, and you never thought they'd be so indifferent.

We can't control others.

But you also know if someone is worth your time.

If the man responds positively, you'll fall in love and think he likes you. If it's not true, you'll be hurt. At least he was honest.

Human relationships are amazing. You don't always get what you give. Both sides need to invest in the relationship. When someone is sad, care can help. But arguments can hurt it.

If you give and they take, you'll run out.

Be nice to me if you want me to be nice to you.

Is your kindness to others what they need?

Can the other person treat you well?

Nothing is a must.

Just because parents are good to their children doesn't mean the children will be good to them.

Some parents' love can suffocate their children. Some children only care about having fun.

These beliefs are unreasonable and make you paranoid.

Your emotions are yours.

You think it's their fault, but they might not feel the same.

Depression is feeling lost after your expectations aren't met.

While you were sick, many people cared about you.

There are still lovely people in life.

You say you don't want to lose him, but he never belonged to you.

Just let it be. You'll be happier as friends.

Get well soon!

Hello! I'm Gu Daoxi Fengshou Slender Donkey, your heart exploration coach!

The questioner's experience is very heartbreaking. Ping allows me to give the questioner a big, warm hug!

Perhaps no one in the world cares for each other—and that's okay! No giving is bound to be rewarded, and no liking is bound to be reciprocated. When we understand the reasons behind it and still treat the other person well, it's because we are willing to love like parents love their children—without seeking a return.

But if we know that the other person will not be good to us, we can still choose to be good to others and to expect nothing in return. This is a great way to avoid hurting ourselves and disturbing others!

I'd love to know what the questioner thinks makes a good friend! And in their usual interactions, do the two people interact and respond equally?

Or could it be that the question asker's enthusiasm is one-sided? Before you got sick, were there any conflicts that made him misunderstand?

The other person's refusal to help the seriously ill questioner is a statement. It's a bold move! It seems like the relationship just isn't quite there yet for him to take you to the hospital. Or, perhaps he's just not ready to take things to the next level based on his past experience of getting along with you, thinking that you might be joking.

Oh my goodness, the girl the questioner thinks she is getting along with well doesn't care about herself and celebrates other people's birthdays! What is the relationship between the other person and this person like? Is the relationship between oneself and the other person the result of one's own unilateral efforts?

All the usual interactions hide the closeness of the relationship, but that's okay! The other person may just care more about the relationship with another person, and that's not the questioner's fault.

The questioner has experienced illness and emotional ups and downs. It is actually normal to experience emotional fluctuations. It is impossible to suppress all emotions all the time; they will erupt at some point. It is actually normal for the questioner to be angry. And that's okay!

It's totally normal to lose your cool when emotions get the better of you. We've all been there! But remember, it's not your fault. If you feel like swearing is wrong, you can always apologize. And while the other person might not accept it, that's not your concern. You've done your best, and that's all that matters!

Pay attention to yourself! You'll be rich inside and better able to cope with changes. Don't rely on others for your emotions. Once they leave, your emotional world will collapse.

Don't force it! Not all love will be reciprocated, but as long as you stay true to yourself and treat people with sincerity, you will eventually meet a better version of yourself!

I highly recommend reading the following books: "When You Start Loving Yourself, the World Will Come to Love You," "Find Your Place in the World," "Maybe You Should Talk to Someone," and "Accepting Imperfection."

Wishing you all the best!

Dear friend, I can see you're confused and hurting. It's tough to face health crises, relationship challenges, and inner pain and confusion. When you're feeling helpless, angry, disappointed, or even blaming yourself, it's normal to have these reactions when facing stress and challenges.

We all face challenges in our relationships and sometimes find it tough to ask for help and understanding.

This expectation and dependence in relationships is sometimes called "projection." It means that we project our emotions and needs onto others and expect them to meet our expectations. There are many factors that influence interactions in relationships, including personal emotions, expectations, and socio-cultural backgrounds.

It's natural to feel affection for this friend and expect him to show the same care and respond to you in kind. However, everyone has their own emotional boundaries and ways of coping, and sometimes they may not be able to meet our expectations. This isn't our fault, nor is it his fault; it's just a difference in emotional needs between people.

The term "moralistic entrapment" you mentioned is when someone demands that another person behave in a way that goes beyond what is reasonable in the name of morality. In this case, you may have put pressure on him to respond to your needs in the way you expect without realizing it.

However, everyone has their own boundaries and comfort levels, and sometimes they may not be able to meet our expectations.

Your friend may not have given you the comfort you expected when you were sick, which may make you feel neglected and betrayed. However, people may react differently when faced with the suffering of others. Some may not know how to express their concern, while others may be unable to provide support due to their own problems.

Just because he's not willing to go to the hospital with you doesn't mean your feelings aren't important. It could be a personal boundary or a fear of hospitals.

Just because you asked him to come with you to the hospital doesn't mean you were unreasonable. And just because he didn't go with you doesn't mean he doesn't care about you. We all have different comfort zones and ways of dealing with stress.

Regarding your female friend, it's possible that her behavior triggered an emotional response in you. In relationships, we often expect understanding and support, and when this isn't met, we may feel hurt and angry.

However, we all have limited emotional resources and abilities, and we can't always expect to get the support we need from others.

Emotions can be a double-edged sword. They can either make us or break us. When our emotions get the better of us, we often lose our sense of reason and say things we regret afterwards.

It's not our fault, but we have to live with the consequences. Your emotional outbursts, including scolding your friends, are a way for you to release your stress and pain.

While this kind of behavior can hurt others, it's also a way of dealing with your own pain.

In these moments, it's important to take a step back and reflect on our own actions. We need to recognize that our emotions aren't always logical. When we realize that we've hurt someone, an honest apology is essential, even if the other person doesn't accept it.

We can't control how other people feel.

As for your relationship problems, there's nothing wrong with liking someone. But if your actions make the other person feel uncomfortable, you might want to reconsider your approach. Liking someone doesn't mean trying to possess or force the other person to reciprocate your feelings. It means respecting the other person's feelings and choices.

Not every love will be returned, and not every effort will be acknowledged. But as long as we stay true to ourselves and treat others with sincerity, we'll be able to meet the right person at their best.

We may hit some bumps along the way, but every hiccup is an opportunity to learn and grow.

Your feelings are understandable, and your actions are driven by a desire for care and support. However, building and maintaining healthy relationships requires mutual effort and understanding.

It's important to learn to pay attention to yourself and cultivate inner abundance. Relying on others to handle your emotions is a form of dependence and also carries a risk.

When the other person leaves, our emotional world can come crashing down. To avoid this, we should learn to be independent, cultivate our own interests and hobbies, and establish a stable sense of self-worth.

Let's treat ourselves and others with a forgiving heart. In life, we need to learn to navigate the ups and downs, but we also need to find moments of calm.

When we're emotionally strong, we can handle whatever life throws at us, whether it's good or bad. True strength comes from having a calm, resilient mindset.

If we can stay calm when things get tough, we can keep a lid on our emotions and stay focused on the task at hand.

Every effort deserves recognition, and every drop of sweat deserves respect. Feedback, attention, and praise are not just forms of recognition; they're also incentives.

This kind of feedback is like spring rain nourishing our hearts, giving us more motivation to pursue excellence and create more value.

Good day.

It is often difficult to distinguish between right and wrong, as the two are often intertwined. When I watch TV dramas with my grandmother, she always asks me, "Is this person a good person or a bad person?"

I would inform her that it is challenging to ascertain whether this individual is inherently good or bad. History shows that even those who have done some good have also done some bad, and vice versa.

"

Regarding a colleague with whom you have a professional relationship. Even if there is a lack of interest in maintaining the relationship, they are simply a colleague.

In the event of a classmate becoming seriously ill, failing to provide assistance is also a particularly cold and disapproved of act. I do not believe you were in the wrong; it was your two friends or classmates who were too indifferent. They were in the wrong in this matter, you were not.

You have recently commenced studies at the university and are residing in the dormitory. You are currently unwell and in a precarious condition. It is likely that it is nighttime, and you have stated that none of your roommates have yet awoken. You have also indicated that you did not consider contacting emergency services.

If you request assistance from acquaintances or friends in an emergency, I believe that is a reasonable expectation. However, the individual in question was uncooperative and dismissive, even refusing your request because he wanted to take a shower.

Such a rejection is likely to result in a strong emotional reaction, including feelings of hatred, resentment, and rage. In an emergency, you can also disturb the sleeping roommate next to you. They also have the responsibility to take you to the hospital.

It is not acceptable to simply stand by and observe the situation without taking action.

Regarding your other friend, you indicated that she did not offer any support or assistance when you were ill.

I believe there are some underlying issues with her as well. How can this be accomplished by a reliable associate?

She should have visited you or otherwise taken care of you, or at the very least, provided some form of comfort. She did not offer any such support, and it would be inadvisable to continue the friendship in its current state.

If you feel negative emotions towards this individual as a result of this situation, I believe this is an entirely normal reaction. You did not act incorrectly; the other party is simply exhibiting a lack of warmth.

If you wish to be cordial to someone, it is reasonable to expect that person to reciprocate. This line of reasoning may be perceived as somewhat immature.

In a relationship, there is no expectation of reciprocity. My preference is to be nice to you, but I recognize that is not a universal standard.

The decision of whether or not to be nice to me is yours to make. However, if the relationship is unbalanced and we can only be friends when I am nice to you, it will not work.

You have assumed that you are friends, but he has not reciprocated. Without a mutual commitment to friendship, there is no basis for considering you to be friends.

He has indicated that he does not wish to maintain the status of friendship with you, and has expressed the opinion that your actions are bothersome.

Furthermore, in a group chat where both of you were present, your girlfriend expressed support for another individual's birthday. In my view, there was no wrongdoing on her part.

She should provide comfort as a friend, as she is also friends with other people. Friendships are broad, not narrow. While exclusivity is a quality of romantic relationships, it is not a defining characteristic of friendships.

It is possible for individuals to maintain positive relationships with multiple parties simultaneously, fostering a multitude of deep connections.

It is evident that individuals are often correct and incorrect in their assessments. The distinction between right and wrong is often blurred. I believe this is also true of our situation.

It is not possible for any of us to be infallible. We are all capable of making mistakes. You were kind to your friend, and that was your own behaviour. There is no fault to be found on your part.

You desire to spend the remainder of your life with this individual. A romantic relationship is one that is mutual, and only those who love each other can spend the rest of their lives together. It is not one-sided, so it cannot be considered a romance.

It was not a genuine friendship; it was merely a one-sided infatuation.

There is not sufficient scientific evidence to corroborate your assertion that he infected you with the disease. The incubation period between infection and the onset of symptoms is typically three to five days.

It is also possible that you met someone else during this period of time and were infected by them. Alternatively, it could have been an indirect infection. We are unable to subjectively determine who infected you, and this is not a scientific approach.

Mistakes in judgment are an inevitable part of life. You have stated that you have lost your best friend and that you have lost something important.

If the individuals in question do not consider you a friend, then it would be inaccurate to say that you have lost their friendship.

Once you have recovered, you may wish to consider returning to school and forming a new friendship. It would be beneficial to re-evaluate your approach to friendship and treat it with a more mature attitude.

It is important to recognize that our friendships are built together, and that one-sided passion does not constitute a genuine friendship. When one party is investing a disproportionate amount of effort in a relationship, it may be beneficial to consider choosing again, selecting someone who is genuinely committed to being friends with you and investing in a genuine friendship.

I would like to take this opportunity to extend my love and best wishes to you, as well as encourage you to love yourself.

Hello, question asker.

Sharing warm hugs.

You're confused. Let me explain. My best friend is a guy I met at university. I have a crush on him and he knows it. We've known each other for six months. We met in the first half of the first year.

I knew right from wrong, and I knew I had caught his illness. I asked him to come with me to the hospital at around 11 o'clock to have a look.

He made excuses not to go. His life was hanging by a thread, his roommate was unconscious, and the rest of the people were not in the same place. He didn't think about calling 911, but he should have. The situation was already serious enough to call 911.

I didn't call 120. After communicating with my then-best friend (we hadn't contacted each other for 15 days), he didn't say anything specific.

He said he wanted to take a shower. His life was hanging by a thread, he was out of breath, and he could faint at any moment.

My best friend said she wanted to take a shower. The truth is, I had already broken down a bit.

When something like this happens when you first go to college, you do everything according to your previous behavior patterns. I am nice to you, and you must be nice to me.

In fact, I heard from others that it was a bit of moral kidnapping. In the afternoon, he bought an apple and said he wanted to give it to me as a way of consoling me.

I still have a good impression of him. We can definitely be friends.

I was determined not to lose him. Later, his condition worsened and he was transferred back home for treatment. I was helpless, miserable, and hopeless.

For more than a week, he was severely depressed and lost 20 pounds.

He had suffered from depression since junior high school and was already a freshman in college, having taken medication for six years. That moment, he exploded.

The trigger was a girlfriend who was also a good friend at the time. When I was sick, she didn't even comfort me. She was busy cheering for other people's birthdays in the group chat we had in common. I went completely crazy.

He cursed everyone, including the two of them. I poured all my emotions into them, and they had no right to ignore me.

I hated it. I resented it. Such resentment can be transformed into a ghost.

At the time, I said I wanted to die and haunt them as a ghost. But I came to my senses.

I asked the other students, and they confirmed that the boy never liked going to the hospital.

Even when he was sick himself, he still managed to find a way to avoid going to the hospital. I felt like I was always doing the wrong thing.

You messed everything up. I had a good relationship with that guy, but I kept trying to do things that were out of the ordinary, and he thought I was harassing him.

I had a good relationship with everyone before, obviously.

I deliberately distanced myself from other people, thinking only about spending the rest of my life with this guy. I never expected that my affection would become a burden to him. He didn't say it was a burden, but he hinted at it to me, and I was foolish to not understand.

I refuse to do the wrong thing and lose something important.

I was unaware that my preferences were causing issues for others. I also didn't realize that I couldn't empathize with others and that I could potentially infect them.

"Have I really done something wrong?"

From your description, it's clear you're a girl with a strong sense of self-awareness and self-reflection. You know that when you give to others, you must expect a corresponding return. You're confident that if you want to love others, they must love you. When you meet a boy you like and see that he's getting too close to other girls, you get angry. You know it's not right, but you also deeply blame yourself, worrying that you will hurt others by doing this.

The first step to change is acceptance. Everyone has their own personality, and you must accept yours, not reject it. There is no right or wrong. You also learned that in your attempt to stop the boy you liked from getting with this girl, you ended up pushing him away. This shows that our methods and approaches to interpersonal relationships need to change. This is the first step to growth.

You have to know what good relationships are like. Independence is the first requirement. You have to be independent of each other and have independent personalities. He also has to be independent of each other. Let me be clear: if you say that I should be nice to others, others must be nice to me. In fact, from one perspective, you hope that others will be nice to you, so you are nice to others. You are relying on others to be nice to you. If you are strong enough, you can take care of yourself and be good enough for yourself, and you don't need others to be nice to you. That is why when you are nice to others, others not only don't appreciate it, but become more and more distant from you.

Start becoming valuable and shining from now on. Those who appreciate you will find you. Don't waste your time trying to force it with those who don't appreciate you. If it's not meant to be, there's no point in forcing it.

That's all for now. I love you all, and I'm going to make a difference in this world.