My husband is too close to a female employee, and our marriage is on the brink of collapse. What should I do?

Hello! I know this is a tough situation. Here are a few suggestions that might help:

1. Get some help from a professional: When there are problems in a relationship, it's always a good idea to get some help from a professional marriage counselor or psychologist. They can give you some helpful advice on how to resolve conflicts and improve mutual understanding.

2. Open up and talk about your feelings: It's so important to talk to your husband about how you're feeling. Let him know about any problems you're having and your concerns about his behavior.

If you think your husband might be a bit too trusting with his employees, it's important to talk about it.

3. Build trust: It's going to be tough, but try to trust your husband's loyalty. If you don't trust him, it'll only make things worse and might hide the real issues between you.

4. Set reasonable boundaries: If you have children or a more intimate relationship, it's a great idea to set some boundaries with your husband. For example, you can stipulate that you cannot spend too much time at work on evenings after overtime or weekends.

5. Try to keep your distance from colleagues. If you notice that your husband is getting too close to his employees, it might be a good idea to make sure that you keep a proper distance between you.

6. Think about doing something together that you both enjoy. Having something you both love can really help to strengthen your relationship.

7. Reflect on your behavior: It might also be helpful to think about how you handled this situation. Were you perhaps a bit too impulsive and emotional?

It might be helpful to think about whether you've given your husband enough space and time to deal with the issue.

8. Communication: Last but not least, effective communication is the key to solving any problem. It's so important to communicate openly and honestly, share your feelings and concerns, and try to find a solution together.

I really hope these suggestions are helpful for you. Please remember that this is a complex issue that will take time and patience to resolve.

The anxiety about the future is already affecting how we see the present.

It's understandable that the wife is uneasy and defensive, but at the end of the day, "getting too close" is at most a threat rather than evidence. Just feeling uncomfortable and uneasy, but seemingly anticipating the worst-case scenario, I'm afraid that from any perspective, you wouldn't consider it worthwhile or reasonable.

Given that you trust your husband and believe he's honest and loyal, it seems like you're missing out on something overall in your relationship with him.

It'd be good to figure out if it's a work issue or something personal.

It seems like you and your husband are also colleagues at work. You have your own ideas about the work abilities of the two female employees, which has led to specific points of conflict with your husband. It's easy to get confused and mixed up when you have two roles like that. As a colleague, you need to respect your husband's authority and decisions. But as a wife, it's difficult to stay quiet. Maybe you can separate your current identity and position in specific communication.

In other words, it doesn't matter who the boss is at work, you can communicate and protest over the phone. To be honest, not many people can stand someone who is on the phone for hours at a time at home, whether the person on the other end of the line is a man or a woman.

Regarding your husband's appreciation

It seems like your unease is more about the other party being a woman than your husband's concerns about the potential issues with relying heavily on women in the workplace. You might have a valid point, but if your husband isn't convinced and thinks you're being "unreasonable," it might be time to let it go. It's clear that he trusts his own judgment more than yours.

It's easy to see how everyone's opinion of someone else is shaped by their relationship with them. When you have a good relationship, you tend to see the other person in a positive light. When it's not so good, you're more likely to see the negative side. Your husband's opinion of female employees is a good example of this. Just as he appreciates and trusts them, you might not see them in the same way. And it's not just personal relationships that affect our opinions. The relationship you have with your boss is also an important part of your ability to do your job well.

Similarly, it's more about the relationship and hostility when a female employee is seen as incompetent. The actual facts don't really matter.

The only way to know if something is true is to try it out.

It seems like your husband's "heart still being there" is more important to you than anything. At least he's not hiding from the annoying phone calls anymore. It looks like he's building a relationship with his boss, training him to be his confidant in a certain way. You can negotiate the duration or even ask to "out of sight, out of mind." Given the continuous similar incidents, it's hard to say whether it's the inevitable nature of female employees or a certain tendency. It might be tough to explain your husband's psychological needs and thinking logic clearly. But if you can judge whether this is just a feeling of unease or a threat that may come at any time, then only you can decide.

When things are "on the verge of breaking up," you need to make a choice. Is it better to try to get rid of your own unease and face the consequences, or is it better to believe that your husband "still has a heart," believe in his ability and authority at work, and believe that the two of you just need to make moderate adjustments to your relationship without having to insist on "either you live or I die" and engage in confrontation? Everyone has their own sense of what is right and just based on their own feelings and position. This may be valid in the local and specific sense, but it may not be the best solution. This is especially true when it comes to intimate relationships, especially when there is still "love and affection" between the two of you. There may be more important and more correct needs and pursuits for us than correctness and justice.

I wish you all the best.

Hello. It's clear to me that you're troubled in your marriage. From your description, it's evident that your husband's relationship with his female subordinates has gone beyond the normal scope of colleagues. It's obvious that your husband has developed a fondness for the female employees and even wants to develop some kind of relationship.

You are suspicious of your husband and at the same time very anxious, fearing that he may have fallen in love with someone else. You are afraid of losing your husband and that he may betray you.

As a wife, you must take action to prevent this from happening again. Despite the crisis being temporarily resolved when your last female colleague left, there are still some problems between you.

Your lack of effective communication has prevented you from understanding each other's true feelings. Your husband is attracted to women with extroverted personalities because they are good at expressing themselves and can make him feel warm. They have certain qualities, such as being good at expressing themselves and being charming.

Women can be coquettish to arouse men's desire to protect them, so as to achieve their own goals. You should change yourself and learn from the Chinese to control the enemy.

Those people are quite the tea and quite the bitches. We will come up with a more tea-like routine by learning their tricks.

I suggest you have an open and honest conversation with your husband to let him know your true feelings.

When communicating with your husband, remain calm and don't be emotional. Don't try to persuade the other person with words; put yourself in their shoes and seek their advice.

Don't be too strong, but show weakness when it's needed. You need to examine yourselves and think about how you can regain each other's trust.

Best wishes.

Dear friend, I empathize with your current state of distress and confusion. It is not uncommon for individuals in such circumstances to experience feelings of uncertainty, unease, or even anger. What you are navigating is a challenge that many couples may encounter.

Your sentiments are understandable, as trust and loyalty are fundamental aspects of marriage. Your concerns are rooted in a genuine concern for the stability and integrity of your marriage and family.

The issue of trust and boundaries in relationships is a highly complex one. While there may not have been any actual infidelity on the part of the husband in question, the lengthy periods of private communication and the excessive dependence on work could indeed pose a threat to the marriage.

Individuals with extroverted personalities may be particularly adept at social interactions, yet this does not necessarily translate to suitability for all occupational roles, particularly in the context of personal relationships.

Trust is the foundation of a relationship, while communication serves as the bridge that sustains it. The situation you describe involves multiple aspects of trust, communication, and work and personal boundaries.

It is possible that your husband has developed an over-reliance on certain employees due to factors such as work pressure and his personality. This may have an impact on your feelings and trust as a partner. It is also possible that your husband is unaware that his actions have caused you distress, or that he is seeking a form of support or recognition unconsciously.

You indicated that your husband's affections remain directed towards you, which suggests that the foundation of your relationship is robust. Nevertheless, once trust has been breached, it necessitates collaborative efforts from both parties to restore it.

It would be advisable to attempt another honest conversation with your husband in order to express your feelings. You could use "I" statements, such as "I feel uneasy when...", which may help to reduce the other person's defensive response. At the same time, it would be beneficial to try to understand his position. It is possible that he is simply seeking support and cooperation at work.

Furthermore, it would be beneficial to analyze with your husband the source of his excessive trust in female employees. This could be due to work dependence or other reasons. Additionally, it would be helpful to set boundaries between work and personal life with your husband. This could include distinguishing between working hours and private hours, as well as between work calls and private calls.

Furthermore, it would be beneficial to investigate why other employees are discontented with her. This may entail examining matters of fairness within the workplace and team dynamics.

With regard to the aforementioned female employee's aspiration to become a partner, it is imperative that this decision be based on her professional capabilities and contributions to the company, rather than on personal relationships. A joint evaluation of her actual contributions and her potential value to the company's future can be conducted.

Concurrently, it would be prudent to encourage your husband to cultivate a more team-oriented spirit, rather than relying excessively on individual employees.

It is imperative not to disregard one's emotions and to be unafraid to request assistance. Whether it is communicating with one's spouse or seeking aid from friends and family, it is a courageous action.

It is therefore important to seek assistance in order to maintain one's own happiness and the stability of the marriage.

Every effort is deserving of acknowledgment and every ounce of effort is deserving of respect. Feedback, attention, and praise serve not only to recognize achievements but also to provide motivation for continued effort.

Such feedback can be likened to spring rain, nourishing the heart and providing motivation to pursue excellence and create value.

Good managers know how to use people well. Even good people have shortcomings.

Obedient people are weak. Strong people are shrewd and can start their own business.

A successful manager must learn to deal with people of all personalities. It doesn't matter if some employees are performance-oriented or pleasing; the key is the boss's ability to control them.

We need to check if the information you have is reliable.

I don't know where you got your information, but I can only analyze it based on what you told me.

It seems your husband's relationship with his employee has gone beyond what's appropriate. It involves both the boss-employee relationship and the married person's relationship with the opposite sex.

Your husband used the other person's strong work ability to defend himself against your doubts and objections. This is an excuse for the first case, but not the second.

There may be reasons you don't know about, or maybe you're just too generous. It's also possible he's not self-disciplined and is easily misled.

Believing your husband's heart is with you and he hasn't cheated on you physically doesn't mean you're confident.

If that's true, why did your husband's relationships with his employees cause problems in your marriage?

Maybe you haven't noticed your relationship cooling. Maybe you don't show your husband much concern. If he's cheating, why would he be happy with just an affair with an employee?

If you say it's because of your personality or lack of seniority, that's not convincing.

I think the main reason for the differences between you and your husband is the lack of effective communication between you.

You also need to think about how you act at home and with your husband.

To solve your husband's "entanglement" with female employees at work, you need to work harder, identify the problem, and learn more about your shortcomings.

Hello!

From what you've told me, it seems like your husband and the female employee often chat about work. You feel a bit uncomfortable about this, and you've been hinting to your husband, raising questions, and arguing to try to resolve this issue. However, this problem hasn't been resolved yet, and in the end, the female employee made a mistake and resigned to end the conflict between you. Both times, it was the same conflict and the same way it ended, but in the meantime, it has affected your relationship with your husband, and you are worried about your relationship.

In both cases, it seems like your husband's chat with the female employee was the cause. You handled it in the same way, which may have caused more conflict than if you had handled it differently. But here's the thing: the way you handled the first conflict didn't solve the problem. In fact, in both cases, your husband didn't let the female employee off the hook just because she and he got along. He dealt with her.

This just goes to show that your husband is very rational and has not lost his judgment.

When you questioned your husband's relationship with the female employee, it made your husband feel that you didn't trust him. I know it can be hard to consider your feelings when you're trying to be supportive, but it's so important to remember that you have feelings too! So, what you need to do is tell your husband how you feel, not question him.

I really think that

It's totally understandable that you're comparing the way you get along with the female employee to the way your husband gets along with you. But, this kind of comparison can lead to feelings of jealousy and distrust.

It's so important to tell your husband when you're feeling uncomfortable.

At the same time, the two incidents also show that your husband may be more inclined to be eloquent. What you need to do is encourage your husband to find someone who can speak eloquently, but such a person needs to consider their personal abilities. In the two incidents, you were actually hurt by the employees, and this loss is the common interest of you and your husband. You need to pull your husband onto the same side before you can act in unison.

You can tell your husband that you trust him, but that he needs to consider how people of average ability might affect you.

I really hope this is useful for you! Warm regards!

Hello, I'm a heart detective coach, and I'm grateful for the opportunity to offer some guidance.

From your written description, it seems that there might be some challenges in your relationship as a couple. It appears that the two female employees have a similar approach to interacting with your husband, which could be a contributing factor. They seem to enjoy chatting with your husband about work, sharing interesting stories, and expressing mutual concern.

It is perfectly fine to simply chat with your husband, but if you can find ways to engage in mutual concern and encouragement, it could help to deepen your relationship.

As the relationship deepens, your husband may be more inclined to give opportunities to people at work who interest him more and with whom he is more comfortable. This could include the first female employee you saw.

It is not uncommon for her to be given a great deal of important work, and if she does not make a mistake in following up on it, it is likely that your husband will keep her on.

Perhaps we can gain insight into your situation by considering the example of this first female employee. It may be that you and your husband are not able to provide the same level of emotional support and engagement in conversation as this employee does in her daily life.

It is possible that if your husband meets someone like this, he may feel that it is someone he likes and with whom he wants to continue to interact, which could result in a closer relationship with this female employee.

If it isn't an imposition, I would be grateful to learn more about your daily communication with your husband. Do you often have the opportunity to chat?

Could you please elaborate on the differences between you and this female employee?

It is important to note that a single incident may not provide sufficient insight. However, with the occurrence of a second incident, it is natural to wonder whether a third might also take place. This is a valid concern, and it is essential to understand the underlying issue to address it effectively.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider whether there have been any difficulties in your daily communication as a couple.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider why your husband chose to speak with an outsider rather than with you. It's possible that he finds it beneficial to communicate with her, and that she offers him a sense of empathy.

It would be beneficial for you to learn and adjust the emotional state of your husband-and-wife communication, as both female employees are very good at this communication style. Could you please describe how you communicate on a daily basis?

Before getting married, did you find that you were able to communicate well with this female employee? It's just that after getting married, women may have to gradually adapt to marriage.

It is understandable that women may find it challenging to devote 100% of their attention to their relationship when they have children. Having children inevitably means that one's attention is divided between them and one's spouse.

Additionally, after marriage, there were concerns about matters in both families, which may have had an impact on the relationship and marriage. This is a natural consequence.

So, it seems that your relationship with your husband is not as harmonious as you would like it to be. Perhaps it would be helpful to take a moment to reflect on some of the experiences you have had together over the years of marriage. Let's take a closer look at what might be causing the problem.

And so, we have considered the first person. Might I inquire as to your thoughts on the second person?

The second person, as you describe her, is quite talkative but may have some difficulty working. However, she is able to gain your husband's trust.

It seems that you are feeling quite angry inside. This may be manifesting as arguments with your husband, a lack of happiness or warmth towards him, or other forms of conflict.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider this: if a husband were to encounter his wife's cold demeanor and unfamiliar language at home, or if he were to perceive hints of distrust in her words and actions, would he feel a decrease in the trust he places in his marriage? Could this affect his mood?

It is understandable to feel angry when we see a woman approaching your husband. However, if our relationship with our husband is not as strong as we would like, it could potentially lead to the other person gaining the upper hand.

If she is not very capable, we can gently point it out without being critical. After all, if we say something critical, it may be mixed with our personal opinions, and your husband may not be convinced easily.

Perhaps it would be best to focus on the facts, which are indisputable.

It might also be helpful to ask your husband how he feels about this female employee. You could, for instance, ask him if he'd be willing to chat with her for three hours.

I may be mistaken, but it seems that this female employee doesn't often bring you emotional value. From what I saw, you two seemed quite happy after chatting.

Afterwards, it might be helpful to consider his state of mind. Perhaps it would be best to avoid exposing our emotions just yet, and instead ask him more about his thoughts. We could then guide him to realize that he seems to have crossed the line.

After all, everyone wants to be with someone they get along with, and I believe that's the case for you too. So if there's a man who can give you a lot of warmth and listen to your inner voice, it's possible you might feel interested in him.

Through this kind of empathy, we can gain insight into the communication pattern and way of getting along between the two of you as a couple. This insight may lead to the conclusion that modifications are needed during this incident.

Given the current state of your relationship, it's understandable that you're feeling anxious about the introduction of a third female employee.

If it isn't an imposition, could you tell me a little more about the current situation between you and your husband, how you communicate, and the cold-war fighting and implied questions you ask him?

Could you please clarify whether these content methods are appropriate and targeted? I'm confident we can find a solution together.

You are welcome to click on my personal homepage and ask me questions, so that I can help you to gain a more accurate understanding of the situation. I must admit that at the moment, I am more of a guess at your overall situation based on my personal experience.

It might be helpful to identify some inappropriate places so that we can work on improving them together.

I will then await your reply and wish you all the best.

Give yourself a hug first!

Dealing with marital relationships and trust issues in this situation requires care and patience. Follow these suggestions to help you cope with the current situation:

Have a calm, rational conversation with your husband. Express your concerns and feelings, and listen to his views.

Express your concerns. Tell your husband clearly that his close relationship with the female employee makes you feel uneasy. Make it clear that this is not a groundless worry, but a concern you have about your marriage.

Set boundaries. Discuss and set reasonable boundaries, such as the division of working and private time and appropriate ways to interact with colleagues of the opposite sex.

Seek professional help. Get a marriage counselor. A professional counselor can help you communicate better and address issues of trust and boundaries.

Build trust. Work to build more trust in your marriage. Do this by increasing the amount of time you spend together, participating in activities together, and showing love and support in your daily lives.

You must pay attention to your feelings while dealing with this issue. Find a support system, such as friends, family, or a counselor.

Maintain your self-esteem and confidence when facing marital problems. Don't allow your husband's behavior to make you question your own value.

Make a plan. If the problem persists, make a plan for dealing with it. This should include how to deal with your husband's infidelity and protecting your rights if necessary.

Think long term. Consider your expectations and the future of your marriage. If your husband is unable to meet your needs or if trust cannot be restored between you, you may need to consider a longer-term solution.

Protect yourself. In any situation, ensure your emotional and financial security. Don't neglect your own well-being because of marital problems.

Dealing with marital problems requires effort and communication from both sides. Remain calm and respectful, and ensure that your needs and feelings are taken seriously.

Seeking professional help is the wise choice when necessary.

It's totally normal to feel a bit confused and hurt when you're faced with a dilemma like this. The good news is that there are ways you can protect your emotions while also resolving the problem. Here are some suggestions:

1. Seeking professional advice is a great idea!

You should definitely consider talking to a professional marriage counselor! Marriage counseling is a great way to get some help and guidance from a neutral third party. It's a perfect opportunity to explore issues, express feelings, and find solutions.

2. Communicate clearly!

Try to find a calm moment to have an in-depth conversation with your husband. Use "I" statements to express your feelings and concerns, for example: "I feel ignored and uncomfortable when you have frequent private contact with other female employees."

Avoid accusations and focus on expressing your feelings and needs. This is your chance to show your partner how much you care about them!

Now for some personalized advice!

It's so important to protect your own emotions in the process. Make sure you have your own social circle and activities! Not only will they provide you with additional emotional support, but they'll also help you maintain emotional balance and independence.

Also, it would be really great for you if you could try to understand why your husband appreciates and trusts these female employees. It would also be a fantastic idea if you could explore whether there are healthier ways to meet his need for recognition and a sense of accomplishment in the workplace without over-relying on specific individuals.

Finally, it's time to set some boundaries for yourself! Be clear about what you can accept and what you cannot tolerate.

Self-respect and boundaries are absolutely essential in your relationship and marriage!

You have every right to express your feelings and concerns and to seek a solution that makes both of you feel satisfied and secure. I really hope these suggestions will be of some help to you!

Dear Questioner, Dealing with this can be tough. Here are some tips:

Talk calmly and rationally.

First, communicate calmly and rationally with your husband. Stay calm and don't express your views emotionally.

Tell him your concerns and how you hope he can change. Listen to his thoughts and try to understand his perspective.

Understand the problem.

You need to understand why your husband likes these female employees and why they're often at work. Once you know why, you can solve the problem.

Building trust and consensus is key.

Building trust and consensus is key to solving this problem. Work with your husband to build a closer, more trusting relationship.

You can make rules and agreements to make sure you both meet each other's needs. You should also talk about how to avoid similar problems and build a healthier family relationship.

Get help from a professional.

If the above don't work, get professional help. A marriage counselor or psychotherapist can help you communicate and understand each other better, and give you more targeted advice and solutions.

Finally, stand firm in your beliefs and take action to improve your family relationships. This will help you and your husband lead happier and healthier lives.

Dear Questioner, Thank you for your question. I will address it from the following points, having seen your question and confusion.

1. The recurrence of a particular event may signify a significant underlying meaning or implication. In the face of such a recurring occurrence, it is understandable that you may feel a sense of helplessness and frustration. Attempting to discern the meaning behind your husband's behavior by constantly imagining and guessing may not be the most productive approach. Additionally, the fact that your husband engages in lengthy phone conversations with female employees while avoiding you raises questions about the nature of his interactions.

I believe this indicates a lack of common ground between you and your husband, as well as a deficiency in communication. Effective communication is essential for building and maintaining healthy relationships. It's possible that your husband is looking for you to emulate the communication styles of those female employees. Women who are adept at flirting often gain the attention of men. It's not that other individuals can act, but that the verbal behavior that may feel like acting to you is very effective with your husband.

Secondly, it is important to note that the majority of individuals do not thrive in a work environment that is devoid of stimulation. Your husband's preference for a woman who is adept at small talk and able to infuse work with engaging anecdotes suggests that he values a certain quality in a partner. This indicates that he is a person who finds pleasure in life and possesses a sense of humor. It may be beneficial to focus on understanding your husband's positive attributes rather than attempting to persuade him to alter his preferences or replace those around him. Attempting to influence others to change their needs is an ineffective approach.

Hello, I'm June.

From your description, I can sense your anxiety, anger, and helplessness. Your husband has fallen in the same place twice, but it's clear he's not going to correct it, which is concerning and infuriating.

The husband often works overtime alone with a female employee, admiring each other and entrusting her with important work. After work, the two often talk about work on the phone for 1-2 hours, interspersed with some work jokes, anecdotes, and mutual concern and encouragement in their work and lives.

This female employee is a typical performance-oriented personality who is very good at showing off. While everyone else is working hard at work, she frequently goes to her boss to show off her abilities verbally. Other employees are also very dissatisfied with her.

From this description, it's clear you know your husband's work situation inside and out, what he does at work during the day, what he does after work, how he works with his colleagues, and even the work status of his colleagues. I'm impressed.

You have a lot of insecurities.

Your husband's frequent "mistakes" on the same issue are likely a form of rebellion and defiance. Imagine that he is the boss, but he doesn't have the right to make decisions on hiring. He would undoubtedly feel angry.

Or is he unwilling to accept it?

The questioner needs to figure out where these insecurities come from.

I can say with confidence that my husband's heart is still with me, and I know I haven't cheated on him.

From this sentence, it is clear that you are extremely concerned about your husband cheating on you. What is the root of this concern?

Is it social opinion? Is it family-instilled ideas?

Tell me, is it true that men become bad when they get rich? Or do you feel that you lack an emotional connection with your husband?

If you can't find the root of the problem, you will have to keep arguing about the same thing. Your husband may even think you're being unreasonable.

This is just a reference. I wish you happiness!

Dear questioner, I understand your anger. I hope my reply helps.

Your husband chats with the female staff and won't stop even after work. He feels your loneliness and helplessness, and the couple's relationship is on the verge. He doesn't know how you have gotten through all these days. He has tried everything he can think of. Your husband thinks you are being unreasonable.

You married your husband for a reason. What makes you happy? What have you done to make your husband treat you this way? People like new things. Look at yourself and see what has made your husband treat you this way.

Men like to be respected and valued. Female employees satisfy their husbands' needs. They are all performance-oriented and can handle things. What makes you uncomfortable may be exactly what you need to adjust. Look at it. Does your husband enjoy chatting with them for the company?

Men need to be respected in a relationship. I'm sure their careers are also stressful. Can you understand their difficulties? Men will put on an act for the sake of their interests.

If you only see one side, you'll suffer.

If you focus on other people, you will live in resentment and anger. Your husband made a mistake, so why should you have to bear the consequences? If he is happy, you should be happy too. Find ways to have fun and make yourself happy.

Companies also need to survive and develop. There will be many situations during development. People are the primary productive force. Using the right people can bring in a steady stream of resources.

A couple united is strong. March forward for a common goal. Life is a play. Believe in yourself. Focus on yourself. Everyone is an independent individual. No one can predict the future. Your health and happiness are important.

Best wishes!

Hello, dear questioner. I can tell from your words that you're upset and feeling irrational, but I also sense how much you care about your husband.

I totally get it.

I'm so sorry to hear that you and your husband have had an argument. I can understand how upsetting this must be for you. It's natural for the relationship between husband and wife to be affected when there's a disagreement.

It's so important to take care of yourself, especially when you're feeling upset. Try to calm down and relax. If you're in a bad mood for too long, it can affect your physical and mental health.

Next, you'll want to learn to communicate with your husband in a non-violent way.

It's so important to communicate with your husband in a calm and respectful way. If you feel like he's spending too much time chatting with a female colleague, you can gently ask him to shorten the chat time.

Or you could express your own loyalty to the marriage and sense of responsibility for the family while listening to your husband's explanation.

It's so important to learn to trust! Trust is the foundation of any relationship. If you have any doubts, you can always talk to your husband about them. Showing him that you trust him will help to avoid any unnecessary suspicion and keep your family relationships happy and harmonious.

And finally, try to adjust the relationship.

If you find out that your husband is getting too close to his female colleague, you might want to have a chat with him about it. You could suggest that he maintains a professional distance and pays more attention to you and the family.

The most important thing in a relationship is trust. Without it, affection can't grow.

In a marriage, it's so important to remember that each partner is an independent individual. Everyone should have their own personal space, as long as they don't violate the rules that couples should follow. Of course, you can also have your own personal space and time to improve yourself. It's totally fine to devote some of your time and attention to your partner, but don't feel like you have to devote all of your time and attention to them. It's also important to remember to take care of yourself!

If your husband is unwilling to make the slightest concession or change for you, it might be time to think about whether he truly loves you. You have the option to return to single life or to live together in name only. The choice is yours.

Wishing you all the best!

Hello, question asker. I'm Evan, your relationship counselor.

From what the author says, it seems like she's confused and angry, and has other negative emotions. The author and her husband's intimate life isn't perfect. Often, they don't take care of the author's feelings, and even spend more time with female colleagues at work, which makes the author think her husband is cheating on her.

In an intimate relationship, if the questioner wants something that her husband can't give her, it's only natural that she'll feel negative emotions.

How should a wife act around her female colleagues? This is something the husband needs to be aware of. Are both of you getting what you need from your intimate relationship? In an intimate relationship like marriage, it is necessary to maintain basic trust and do things that reassure your loved one. If you cannot take care of your loved one's emotions and feelings, then it is because their needs are not being met. In this case, the husband can only turn to the outside world for help.

I'm not saying the approach taken by the questioner's husband is the right one, but I want to tell the questioner that when there are problems in an intimate relationship, we learn to understand each other's needs and see if we can meet his needs. This may improve the relationship. If you just force your lover not to do something, it will instead make the other person feel rebellious and even worse.

The key is being able to communicate well about the problems that have arisen in your intimate relationship and making an effort to change.

I'll give the questioner a little encouragement here. When talking to your current husband, you can calmly, sincerely, and clearly state your feelings and communicate about them. Since the questioner asked the question on the platform, I'll also give the questioner some brief advice here:

It's important to understand what you want from a relationship.

In an intimate relationship, everyone's needs are not necessarily the same, and this is normal. So, in this situation, what does the questioner want? The questioner can try to express this to her husband.

Everyone has different needs in an intimate relationship. The questioner wants to feel valued and wants her husband to maintain a distance with other women that reassures her, rather than ignoring her requests and only fulfilling his own expectations. If the questioner's needs cannot be met or are not valued in this intimate relationship, it's worth thinking about how this relationship should be managed.

Discuss your relationship or future plans.

The questioner can talk to her husband about their relationship, about her concerns about the current relationship, or about her current needs, and share her feelings about their respective marital status. To get the ball rolling, ask your husband how your relationship has developed over time.

Have some relationship discussions and future discussions: "What made you first think that we should get married? What is the biggest change you have noticed in me since we started getting married?"

As a partner, what are my strengths and weaknesses? How can I improve?

"What are your thoughts on our future and your plans for the future?"

"I've been thinking about marriage. What are your thoughts?" "I believe that in a close relationship, everyone's needs should be met. What are your thoughts on this?"

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Talk to your husband about your relationship in a calm, objective way.

If the relationship between the questioner and her husband is facing challenges, it's important to stay objective and calm when discussing the relationship. If you're facing problems as a family, it's crucial to keep an open mind and avoid getting emotional.

It's important to keep the spark alive in your intimate relationship and not get stuck in a rut.

If she wants to tell her husband that she has her own needs regarding contact with his colleagues, you could say, "I'm not trying to be difficult. I care about you and our relationship, and I just want our relationship to be more intimate and mutually satisfying."

"If you want to keep things going, I hope you can take my request seriously, give me a sense of security, and maintain an appropriate distance from your colleagues."

Be open about your feelings.

It might seem easier to let things take their natural course and avoid difficult topics. However, avoiding these topics will only make things worse.

Instead, take the time to talk through the issue. You could say, "I know that I'm a bit dissatisfied with our love life at the moment and I want to make some changes."

"I think it would be great if we could find some time to chat."

Remember, avoiding these difficult issues will only make things slowly get worse and eventually destroy your relationship. Tell him, "I think we can calmly and honestly talk about our problems."

"Or, there are a lot of things I need to talk to you about, and I hope you can keep an open mind."

Take a moment to identify your feelings in the marriage. Try to think about the reasons for your feelings and explain them to him.

Tell him, "Both of us have needs when it comes to intimacy. I don't know what you're thinking, but I feel like things are different now that we're married."

I hope my feelings will be taken seriously, or that my requests will be taken seriously for our future married life. I feel lost and desperate about the future. This is not the life I want. I hope that husband and wife can be honest with each other and accommodate each other. I hope you can discuss this with me patiently.

Be patient.

If you run into any issues, it's best to communicate in a patient and compassionate manner. It's important to be understanding and open when talking to your loved ones about your thoughts and concerns.

If there's a conflict or problem, stay calm and try to understand the other person. You could say, "I don't want to put too much pressure on you."

I hope we can talk through this calmly and patiently, and I hope you can listen to me. I'm happy to discuss anything openly and honestly.

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Personal growth

Has the husband of the questioner improved or changed as a result of your communication? In this process, it's important for the questioner to pay attention to their own growth and needs.

It's important to develop your own interests and social circles. That way, you won't depend on your husband for your happiness. In a marriage, it's easy to focus on your loved one and neglect yourself. This can extend to your husband, who might neglect your feelings too. Only when you value your own growth and feelings can your husband change his views and realize that you deserve to be loved.

It might be a good idea to seek professional help.

You can also get help from a professional, like a counselor, psychotherapist, or family counselor, if you need it. Ask them if they have any advice. If your husband agrees, you can go to counseling or therapy together.

It's also a good idea for the questioner to speak with a psychologist about the root of their pain and see if they can offer any solutions. Often, in a difficult relationship, the only way to make a change is to take the initiative. This could be a great place to start.

In a marriage, open communication is key to a long-lasting relationship. Love, respect, and courtesy are the basic ingredients for a happy married life.

Be open and honest with your partner and show them you care.

I hope this helps!

Hello! I'm Qu Huidong, a psychological counselor who can make images talk.

It seems that the husband and female employee of the original poster always have something to talk about! They even bring work home with them to talk about after work. The content of their conversations includes work, jokes, and mutual encouragement and concern. From your description, it seems that their lively conversations don't avoid you, and this may be where your differences with your husband lie. Your husband feels that he is being open and honest, but you feel that he is demonstrating by taking over your territory.

In the face of this situation, arguing is definitely not a wise move! It will only push your husband further away. The questioner also admits that the couple's relationship is on the verge of breaking up because there is no trust. But there is a solution! Without trust, there is no basis for communication.

The farthest distance in the world is not a separation between life and death, but two people facing each other and not knowing what to say? When you see and hear your husband laughing and chatting with another girl on the phone, as a wife you must be jealous and angry. But you can choose to turn this negative emotion into a positive one! Ask yourself, "Why doesn't he have so much to say to me?" "Why is she so important?" "Isn't it enough to have suffered once? Can't you see that she's just acting?" Then, take action! You are an independent individual who does not need to depend on anyone to realize your value.

Remember, you are first and foremost you! You can still have your own pursuits, social circles, and career in your marriage.

A woman who can maintain a relatively independent personality and be rich in the heart has both the courage to weather the storms with her husband and the ability to part ways amicably. Therefore, self-growth is the key word in your life, not "watching over him"!

If you can still communicate, remember to change emotional expressions into expressions of emotions. For example, "I saw that you guys talked on the phone for 1 hour and 35 minutes this time, and I really feel uncomfortable. Because I love you, I get jealous, and I mind it. What should I do?" In this sentence, we describe the facts, express emotions, and make demands, so we won't be seen as unreasonable.

If he emphasizes that they are discussing work, then you can also ask him if he can finish the job in three sentences instead of five. If he still disagrees, then we really need to admit that he is "not loving enough," but you can still love yourself well!

Absolutely! Improving and enriching yourself is always the right choice.

Wishing you all the best!

Dear Question Asker, Thank you for your inquiry.

After reviewing your description, I understand your inner confusion and sense of helplessness. However, I also recognize your ability to perceive and acknowledge this uncomfortable emotion, as well as your courage in facing it head-on.

You describe yourself as taking care of things and not cheating, but you often communicate with employees, trusting your employees' children and employees' abilities to perform personality. You communicate with your husband, and even some feelings lead to a flat relationship between you and your husband. You are confused and don't know how to adjust. Is that correct?

From your description, I can understand how you feel. It is not uncommon for women in this situation to feel uneasy and suspicious.

However, it is important to note that men and women have different needs, and it is essential to possess the necessary skills to navigate these differences effectively.

Psychological techniques can be employed to influence your husband and bring peace to your life.

All problems are opportunities for growth and improvement. We are adept at identifying solutions to our own challenges. Based on your description, I have some suggestions to help you.

Firstly, it would be beneficial to be more aware and clarify the situation.

You have indicated that your husband's trust in the female employee is a source of significant discomfort for you. Additionally, you have stated that arguments with him have not yielded the desired effect.

Your indecision and subsequent return to the original situation leaves you feeling helpless and confused. I would therefore like to ask you to identify the source of this insecurity. Is it a lack of confidence in yourself, or something else? I am also unsure as to whether this is a fact or a feeling. By becoming aware of our own psychology, we can identify the root cause of the problem, which will help us to sort out our emotions and move on from this uncomfortable cycle.

Secondly, it would be beneficial to enhance your self-confidence and make necessary changes to your approach.

From your description, I can discern your inner insecurity, which is a normal human emotion. However, it is not possible to change other people, including your husband, at this time. What are you going to tell him? Men are generally more laid-back and less able to understand our minds. Therefore, it is important for us to become more confident and love ourselves more.

It is important to enhance our personal charm when we adjust our state of mind.

It is also possible to influence the situation. When we are confident and sufficiently resilient, we will not be afraid inside, but will be able to identify and implement solutions when problems arise.

It is also important to learn to communicate without emotional expression.

From your description, it is evident that there is a conflict between you and your husband regarding this matter. My recommendation is that we develop communication skills to express our feelings without emotional involvement. Concurrently, we should also learn to show appreciation for our husbands. Everyone appreciates being treated with kindness, and even women enjoy hearing positive things. During this time, we can also offer more praise, encouragement, and support to our husbands.

This will enhance his confidence and comfort level in your presence. It will also help alleviate some of the discomfort.

As a final recommendation, we suggest seeking assistance from external resources.

Should you feel that you lack the strength to come out, or that you still have a great deal of confusion, you may wish to seek the assistance of a professional counselor. These professionals are trained to use their skills to delve into the root causes in your subconscious, adjust your perceptions, understand your inner self, and provide the courage and strength to face these problems.

Additionally, furthering your knowledge of psychology can assist in developing self-love, confidence, and a sense of power and attractiveness. This can also help in moving beyond this emotional state.

I would like to suggest a few books that I believe will be beneficial.

I would like to suggest the following books for your consideration: "Intimacy," "The Brain's Code for Happiness," "Rebuilding Your Life," "The 5 Love Languages," and "Nonviolent Communication."