The friendship of three, worried about their interaction, feeling tired and scared what to do?

Hi, I'm Fei Yun, your heart exploration coach. I'll be with you every step of the way, offering a warm ear and a sincere, empathetic presence.

I can see how you're feeling. You cared about her a lot, but she started spending time with someone else, which made you feel a bit lost. You thought she was the one for you, and she felt the same way about you.

I can see how you're feeling. You cared for a friend deeply, but she became friends with someone else, which made you feel a bit lost. You thought she was the "one" for you, and you were the "one" for her.

And some worries and fears, as you said, a lack of security. This unease has even affected your life and studies.

Let's give you a warm hug and see what's on your mind.

?1. Let's talk about what security means to you.

Let's talk about what it means to feel secure. Security is the psychological need for stability and safety. It's about having a sense of confidence and freedom from fear and anxiety.

Security is the psychological need for stability and safety. It's about having a sense of confidence and freedom from fear and anxiety.

A sense of security can also mean that you're feeling vulnerable to physical or psychological danger, or that you're feeling strong or weak in dealing with things.

For instance, the issue that's concerning you is that the two of them have become close friends. They sit together, interact, and so on, which makes you feel psychologically "threatened" and isolated and lonely.

When you feel secure, it often comes across as a sense of certainty and control.

It can be improved in both external and internal ways.

External: For instance, some material things, such as designer brands and bags, can help fill an inner void. People who have made it in society have a comprehensive social security system, wealth, or power, etc., which can make them feel secure and at ease. They also find a sense of value/existence in the recognition, praise, and approval of others.

Inner: People with a high sense of self-worth are confident in the future and believe in themselves. True self-confidence means having confidence in yourself as a person, and not letting past mistakes or current limitations hold you back.

When someone lacks a sense of security, they often try to increase their certainty and control by influencing the people around them, especially those who are vulnerable. They may even try to control other people's lives. They often justify this by saying, "It's for your own good," but what they really want is to feel safe. (For example, you hope that this friend is just your friend.)

When a person is confident enough about their sense of security, they don't need to manipulate others. This allows the people around them to truly live their lives and enjoy them.

So, whether a person feels secure or not directly affects the quality of life of those around them.

2. What's related to whether it can generate a sense of security?

It's also about self-worth.

It's also about self-worth.

If you boost your self-worth, you'll feel more secure because people with high self-worth are confident in themselves and the world.

If you boost someone's self-worth, it'll make them feel more secure. People with high self-worth have confidence in themselves and the world.

So, self-worth is the foundation of mental health.

Self-worth is a person's own opinion of how valuable they are.

People with a strong sense of self-worth are always looking for ways to improve themselves and are naturally inclined to do good.

If someone has a very low opinion of themselves, they're like glass: they're very sensitive to the opinions of others, and it's difficult for them to get along with others. They often get in the way of their studies, work, and life because of trivial matters, and thus miss opportunities, affect relationships, and delay their prospects.

A person's self-worth is largely influenced by their family of origin and how they were raised by their parents or other significant figures during childhood.

This part of us is similar to the innate part. The "innate" refers to the part of a person that they can't decide on their own when they're young.

This part of us is similar to the innate part. The "innate" here refers to a person's intrinsic qualities that they can't decide on their own when they're young.

A person's self-perception in childhood is largely shaped by their parents' feedback. A child who receives positive reinforcement from an early age tends to have high levels of psychological resilience. They believe in their own worth and are less likely to be affected by setbacks.

If a child grows up in a family where there are only negative comments and no affirmation or encouragement from their parents, they'll lack psychological nourishment.

He'll start to think less of himself, especially if he was abandoned by his parents when he was young. He'll start to think "I'm not good enough, I'm not worthy."

As they grow up, these people often feel unsure of their own value. They can be easily influenced by others and often care a lot about what others think of them.

As they grow up, people like this are often uncertain about their own value and can get pretty wound up over the slightest thing because they don't believe in themselves. They tend to rely on other people's opinions of their value, so they care a lot about what other people say.

People with low self-worth often have a hard time finding happiness.

For more on how to boost your self-worth, check out my article "It turns out that the root cause of psychological problems is this." Just follow the "me"-personal homepage to find it.

In addition, regarding this friendship, try to stay calm. You've seen that what you need to heal is security, thanks to "a friendship between three people."

So, from this perspective, you're still really grateful for their presence in your life. You can be open with them about how you feel, and the friendship can grow stronger.

I hope this is helpful to you. I love you and the world. ?

I hope this is helpful to you. Best regards, [Name]

If you want to keep talking, just click "Find a coach" in the top right corner or at the bottom. I'll keep chatting with you one-on-one.

If you want to keep the conversation going, just click "Find a coach" in the top right corner or at the bottom, and I'll keep chatting with you one-on-one.

How old is the questioner? From what I can tell from the text, it seems like the questioner is really struggling with the friendship of the "three."

"Sometimes I can't join in their conversations. It's awkward when we walk together, but I can't say anything." Oh, it can be so hard when we feel awkward, can't it? Why does the questioner feel awkward when she can't join in their conversations?

If you could speak to her, what would you say?

"I tried to get close to the girl, but she made me feel unpredictable. In the end, we just became friends with friends." It seems that the questioner has also made some effort to get the girl "closer" to him, but in the end, he gave up because of her "unpredictability" and let her become friends with friends. It's so sad to see him feeling powerless and helpless!

"I'm also very tired and scared." I'd love to know what makes the questioner feel tired. And what is she scared of?

"Becoming more and more worried, afraid that they will sit next to each other, afraid of their interactions, afraid of the "disastrous" consequences if they go out and play together. I totally get it! What is it about these "consequences" that makes you so worried and afraid?"

I know it can be tough, but I'm here to help you figure this out. I'm wondering if what you're worried and afraid of is really worth all the worry and fear. I truly believe that if you can sort this out, you won't feel so "confused and miserable."

We all interact with others from the moment we're born, even though we can't yet express ourselves verbally. It's likely that the questioner has faced similar challenges before.

I'd love to know how the questioner has solved similar problems in the past. And how is the current situation different from before?

What can you learn from your past experiences that you can apply to this situation?

From what I can tell, the questioner has a great ability to observe and analyze. Their personalities are very similar, and they are both excellent at interacting with others. I, on the other hand, tend to be quieter and not as sensitive. They are both very good at their studies, which is a wonderful resource for the questioner.

I also want to say that there's absolutely no need to feel sorry for yourself or feel bad about what others have that you don't have. We all definitely have things that others don't have! Who knows, maybe just around the corner, you'll meet someone who is a perfect match for you, and that person may not be interested in others.

I really encourage you to get out there more often. You'll find there are so many more opportunities for you to choose from. And please don't limit your present and future by saying, "I'm a girl with a special lack of security and a little social phobia." That's just you before the "present," and it's not necessarily the "future you" in the future.

I really hope my reply helps you! Wishing you all the best!

Hello!

So now there are three of them, and having a new friend has turned a stable two-person relationship into an unstable three-person one. It's a bit of a dilemma. What should they do?

Let's figure this out together.

The reason a three-person relationship can feel uncontrollable is that when one person faces the other two, they have a choice. If one person chooses one, the other will feel left out. For example, if you don't feel well and don't want to go out, but the other two want to go out, you may feel a little left out when they go out.

For instance, the person who asked the question said, "Sometimes I can't join in with their conversations, and it's awkward when we're together, but I can't say anything." "They're both good at their studies, but I'm not, and I'm tired and scared. I'm getting more and more worried, scared that they'll sit together, scared of their interactions, scared that they'll go out and have fun together." While feeling left out, we're also afraid of losing the long-established relationship with our friends.

Friendships usually form because people are drawn to each other. What attracts us may be our similarities or differences, which is what's known as the complementary type. No matter which type, both parties can find their own value in each other.

For instance, people with similar types of personalities feel that they have more in common and appreciate each other. People with complementary types of personalities have what the other lacks and can serve as role models and learn from each other.

You can decide what kind of relationship you want with old friends and what kind with new friends, based on what you need and how close you want to be with them. Having a clear position might help you feel less stressed.

It's also worth noting that friendships are often exclusive, but it's important to acknowledge that friends can have other friends besides themselves. People have different needs, so they tend to gravitate towards different friends.

If we click with a friend's friend, we can make it work. If we don't see eye to eye, there's no pressure to force it.

Once you understand this, when the three of you are together and the two of them are talking, you can be a good listener. You might not be able to contribute, but you can still take in useful information, which is not a bad thing.

There's no need to worry when they interact. After all, nobody can meet the needs of others in every way.

When your friend needs you, she'll come to you. Of course, this takes a certain amount of self-energy, and that energy is the ability to "be alone."

It's also important to learn how to be alone. When you're by yourself, you can do things that interest you, read books that help you improve your social skills, or read books on psychology to learn more about yourself.

Then, let go of your worries, speak up about what you need, and if you want to spend time with a friend, ask them out.

In short, I believe you have your own unique charm that will attract people who like to be with you. We just need to be true to ourselves and embrace our individuality.

Dear girl, You are the only one out there. Friends are just your thoughts. The one who really goes with you is yourself.

You care about that girl because she has characteristics you lack.

1. Good at interacting with people

2. Study well.

Do you care about this girl because you want these traits, or because of her?

You wanted these traits, so the girl showed up.

Instead of worrying about whether this girl has other friends, focus on being your true self.

Everyone has many sides.

A comedian who is actually an introvert and sensitive.

Someone who seems cold is actually kind and helpful.

People are complex, so psychology studies often find exceptions to rules.

Introverted and sensitive, lacking in security, easily entangled, and prone to suffering. You can also find these traits in your friends.

Everyone shows their best side to others and has moments like that too.

I think the hostess will also be open and talk to others when she gets to know her friends.

There are only three things in this world:

Other people's business, the business of the gods, and your own business.

We can only focus on ourselves. Looking at the original poster's personality, can we see things differently?

1. You feel insecure and have a social phobia.

Something must have happened to make you afraid and make you protect yourself.

Look back at this to find why you feel insecure.

Everyone wants to feel safe.

The earth was not created for humans. To protect ourselves, we need to feel secure.

If you're open to everyone, you're in danger without knowing it.

It's not bad, but depends on your view. I can also see it as "you are more aware of risks than others."

2. I'm not good at all. I'm also tired and scared.

The host seems to think that people who do well in school are good at everything and that those who are good at interacting with others are better than introverts.

Many artists have been introverted and sensitive people since ancient times. Examples include Van Gogh, Yayoi Kusama, Friedrich Nietzsche, and Yasunari Kawabata.

They have delicate emotions, stronger powers of observation, are exceptionally focused, and have rich inner emotions and are full of compassion.

There is no such thing as good or bad. The world is diverse, everyone has a purpose, and everyone is okay.

The host should love themselves more.

Believe in yourself and keep a diary.

You've done some things very well. You also have your own interests and hobbies.

For example:

I'm good at writing. I feel happy when I write.

I have a healthy body. When I wake up and see the sun, I feel strong.

Start with "I'm good at" and "I have," and keep discovering the good things about yourself. You'll become more confident and full of energy.

2. Look for beauty.

Look for things that make you happy.

You can record them with your camera because you see beauty in things others don't.

As you keep creating, you will feel happy.

3. Record your feelings.

The two of them were talking about a topic I didn't understand.

I feel like they're similar in character and I compare poorly.

I'm afraid of losing my friends. I'm worried about how they interact. I can't join in. I feel awkward.

Reflection: Can I control whether they go out with me?

If they're close friends, have I lost the chance to make friends with this girl I care about?

Am I really worse than them?

I need friends who care about me, notice me, and accept me.

Next step: I'm good too. Making friends is a two-way street. My friends can make more friends, and so can I!

The above is part of the content I compiled. The host can also write down your feelings based on your situation. When you keep recording, you will see a more complete you.

4. Accept your flaws.

Everyone is the same. Accept your sensitivity and believe you have good qualities too.

I wish you the best in this friendship. Good luck!

"I'm excited to see what happens when they sit next to each other! I'm also looking forward to seeing how they interact..."

It's like a love triangle, which is something that goes beyond friendship between friends or girlfriends. It's subtle, but it's there!

It's great that you care so much about this friendship! It's clear that you're the one who feels less secure, but you're showing your friend that you're there for her. You hope that she'll care about you, understand you, and be able to chat with you and solve your problems.

But who knows? She might just be the only friend you have in the world. And you can't stop your friends from having other friends. I feel like the love and affection I see is only found between aliens, which is pretty amazing. It's only here that I realize that friendship can also be as selfish as love.

1. "They have similar personalities and are also good at interpersonal interactions, but I am quieter and not particularly sensitive...

Guess what! It's not always the case that only people with very similar personalities can become friends. Sometimes, people with complementary personalities are more likely to have long-lasting and strong friendships, just as in love. How cool is that?

So don't belittle yourself and feel inferior to others. You're great just the way you are! And remember, your friend and her friends are a great pair, but they're not the only ones who are "a pair" in friendship. There are plenty of other people out there who are great friends too! What you can give to your friend, her friends may not be able to give, but that's okay.

The way she gets along with you will definitely be different from the way she gets along with her friends. This is great! You should be happy to have gained an extra friend, instead of selfishly feeling that you have burned a friend and been taken over by someone else.

And who knows—you might even fall in love again in the future! But how will you face the harassment from the "rival" at that time?

2. "They are all very good at their studies, but I am not. I am also very tired and scared, and I am becoming more and more worried...

It is only when you are with outstanding people that you can improve! Focus on your own shortcomings instead of appreciating the other person's strengths, and you'll only make yourself more and more distant from them.

So, you should be absolutely thrilled to have such wonderful friends! At least they recognize you as their "friend."

Friendship is friendship, pure and simple—and it's a wonderful thing! It's not like love, which can sometimes be selfishly possessed.

Embrace the world with friends who are tolerant!