Too much on my mind, unable to study seriously, feeling overwhelmed, what should I do?

Questioner:

Hello? I read your words and I empathize with your inner pain.

It seems as though you may be struggling inside, not knowing what to do, and that it is already affecting you.

You should be able to lead a normal life.

I wonder if certain scenarios might be triggering your memories and underlying sadness.

It can be challenging to move on from things that haven't been resolved. If you were

Perhaps you're considering going back to the beginning and seeking revenge on the person who hurt you.

In real life, there are no ifs and buts. The harm has already been done. What is done is done.

It is important to remember that what has happened in the past is history and cannot be changed. If you are feeling too obsessed,

It's not good for your health to be unhappy and unable to be happy.

If I might make one more suggestion, it would be to try to avoid feeling sad.

Perhaps it would be helpful to come back to the present, focus on yourself, and stop thinking about

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider learning to let go of the past, to forgive yourself, and to avoid being too stubborn.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider ways of loving yourself.

In the past, I was also somewhat stubborn and unable to let go of the people and things that had played tricks on me.

It's understandable to feel frustrated and resentful, but it's important to recognize that expressing these feelings may not reach the other person.

It's important to remember that he can't see it either. Ultimately, it's not about him, it's about you.

If you want to avoid causing yourself pain, you might find it helpful to consider letting go. It can be beneficial to avoid dwelling on things.

Perhaps it would be beneficial to try to cherish yourself.

How can you avoid causing yourself pain? How can you let go?

It would be beneficial to rely on yourself.

For your own well-being, it may be helpful to consider letting go of past experiences and relationships.

Perhaps it would be helpful to let yourself go and learn to forgive yourself, as it is not your fault. According to the law of conservation of energy

It is also said that those who have caused you pain will eventually face consequences, either in the near future or in the distant future.

Perhaps it would be beneficial to consider that the person who causes him pain should not be you.

It might be helpful to find other things that interest you to fill your life.

And may your life be enriched, while also improving your abilities.

Perhaps it would be helpful to reflect on your own experiences and draw wisdom from your pain.

In the book Lifelong Growth, it is suggested that human thinking can be divided into two distinct categories: fixed thinking and growth mindset.

People with a fixed mindset tend to avoid failure, and if they do experience it, they may

It is important to remember that we should not get depressed. A growth mindset is a positive approach that encourages us to view failure as a learning opportunity.

Once they have recovered, they will likely reflect on themselves and draw lessons and strength from their experiences.

And draw strength from it.

It might be helpful to consider going on a trip.

If you're struggling to let go of your obsession, you might find it helpful to go on a trip and see the outside world.

The world on the other side can instill a sense of perspective, reminding us of the vastness of the world and the relative insignificance of our own affairs.

Perhaps this feeling of insignificance could help you to let go of your obsessions.

If you were to visit a hospital, you would likely observe that many people are suffering from significant illnesses.

In the face of such heavy suffering, patients remain optimistic.

And how strong their desire to live is. Your emotional pain is, of course, a very minor issue in comparison.

I wonder if, when you were crying over the lost shoe, you realized that some people

It might be helpful to remember that you could lose your footing.

It is possible to experience love and affection while also recognizing and accepting the presence of obsessive tendencies. It is important to acknowledge these feelings, address them directly, and create a healthy distance between yourself and the situation.

I would gently suggest that the questioner watch A Beautiful Mind, as it might help them gain some insight.

If you feel you are unable to handle the situation properly, perhaps it would be better to let things gradually change.

If I might make a suggestion, perhaps it would be helpful to consider that by allowing more things to gather towards the center of your life, you can create a space for other things to emerge. I hope this is not misunderstood, but I think it's important to clarify that this does not mean replacing one thing with another.

I just wanted to clarify that it doesn't mean "substitute" here; it means "squeeze out." I hope I haven't given you the wrong impression.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider the idea that you don't need to rush to distance yourself from them, or to let go.

Perhaps it would be helpful to view the task as something that can be managed with a gentle push to the side and occasional glances.

Perhaps it seems like a less daunting task. In the long run, you'll

As they become more central to our lives, they may also become more peripheral and increasingly insignificant.

They will remain, but we may not always be aware of their presence.

I am here to support you in healing, and in healing her and yourself. I am committed to growing and improving together with you.

I hope that you will learn to let go and to "断舍离" (Duan She Li), as I am a listener who grows and improves together with you.

Hello, my dear friend. I can feel your inner feelings of depression, anger, powerlessness, and confusion from your description.

It's totally normal to have sad things in your heart about past lovers and friends. It's okay to think you can let go, but these things always come to mind at certain vulnerable moments, which can make it hard to concentrate on your studies.

It's natural to hope that those who have hurt you get what's coming to them, especially when you see that some people who have hurt you are still living happily, as if nothing had happened, and they keep spying on your life. It can be hard to be forced to get along with that person, and it can leave you feeling very broken.

I totally get it. It's so frustrating when you're the one suffering and being punished, even though someone else hurt you. It just doesn't seem fair, does it?

Try to accept your current state, my friend.

It's totally normal to need some time to understand and process your hurt. Give yourself the space you need to heal.

At the same time, you might even get the chance to see yourself and the truth of the matter more clearly. And who knows, maybe this pain and sadness will help you grow and become stronger!

☘️ Why not let go of those past hurts?

I totally get it. You want them to get what's coming to them. It's like you feel like your misfortune was caused by someone else and that they should pay for your suffering.

On the other hand, the other person seems to be living a happy life, which makes you feel a bit out of balance.

I know you've been waiting for someone to give you an explanation, and I'm so sorry that the pain has never really ended in your heart. I'm here to tell you that the wounds inside have never really healed.

It's okay to say that it's you, not someone else, who is holding on to the pain.

☘️ All things are your own choice, sweetheart.

It doesn't matter if we're happy or sad, we get to choose how we live our lives! And we all need to take responsibility for our own lives.

Maybe the past makes us feel pain, but we can choose to let it go. It's our own choice, and it has nothing to do with anyone else.

The good news is that all that is in the past!

How do you want to live your life right now? You get to choose whether you want to work through your feelings and move on from the past, or keep thinking about it.

Wishing you all the best!

Hello.

I don't know if the people and events from the past are still connected to your life now. If you can, cutting off all contact is the best option.

If you can't let go, change your thinking. Don't let go. Accept that you can't let go of the past. Allow yourself to feel sad about these things for a while every day.

This will help you accept yourself and reduce your anxiety. Set a time limit, like no more than an hour. After an hour, tell yourself you need to get on with other things.

Start with the things you can do well to focus your attention. Encourage yourself slowly.

For example, if you like coffee, you should try making it yourself, as well as exploring the shops, making a careful plan, and taking a serious photo while drinking it. This will increase your sense of control over your life, and you will be more satisfied if it is something you like.

Tell yourself more and more that today is another beautiful day. It may sound cheesy, but it works.

If you're interested, try it.

You must learn to let go of the past. Think about why you can't let go. Is it because you still have feelings for the people from the past? Or are you still bitter about the events?

If you still feel aggrieved and believe you deserve an apology, take the time to think about why and then decide how you can best resolve the situation yourself.

Hello!

Always falling apart!

I understand what you mean. I still have to get along with that person. I'm always in a state of collapse. I don't know how long your situation has lasted. I believe the most difficult stage is over. In the future, I will feel a little less collapse.

Unexpected things are like mountains. They are hard to deal with. We have to find ways to adapt and survive. You also said:

Sometimes I feel like I don't care, but then I do.

Sometimes you just need to take a break. When you come back, you'll realize you can adapt. You've come here to seek change. You'll be able to take a longer break. The special moment will become shorter, and the intervals will become longer.

I understand.

I hope they get what they deserve, especially when I see people who hurt me still acting like nothing happened and spying on my life.

It's hard to see someone who hurt you acting like nothing happened. But we can't control other people or their thoughts. We can't understand other people, and they can't understand us. If you hear about your situation, they might think you're making a big deal out of nothing.

We can't blame others for this. We should blame ourselves! Who told us to be romantic? Who told us to be sentimental? Who told us to get involved? So deep that when others walk away, we are still in it, in the middle of emotions. We want others to see us, to pity us, to help us. We want them to reach out, to look over, to give us a hand, to help us. But that is just our wishful thinking.

When the relationship changes, it's different. You should be a woman! The person in the relationship who changes first, whether forced or wanted, has really changed. Even if they're close, when they change, they've really changed. Their hearts are not in it, and it's gone.

But he still allows himself to be trapped in that fantasy. He still feels that he shouldn't change. How can he come before me again?

How can he hurt me? I can't take it!

Why is he making fun of me? You said he's spying on me.

I've experienced a lot in life. I've lived in darkness for over ten years. I've learned that it's easier to let go when love is gone. It's better to face it head-on. The person who changes first should have reached this state from the start.

I hope you can move on from her and forget about him. Even if he's still around, you can't change what's done. I know you think about these things, but you don't need to develop a relationship with them. You might still have hope, but you're in a painful situation.

You can't forget the past. But you can accept yourself. The past and the present make up who you are.

Allow yourself to be sad, angry, or even hate someone. And allow yourself to collapse sometimes. Be vulnerable and weak.

Be vulnerable and weak, but we are adults and we can get through this by relying on ourselves. We must strengthen our hearts.

Take care of yourself. When you feel weak, go outside and get some fresh air or write down your feelings. Or study hard to improve your grades.

I'm just using your love life as an example, but it's the same for friends. We must make ourselves strong and show them that they are human and so are we.

When you become strong and have nothing more to desire, the ball is pointing to something. Reflect on it and I believe good things will come to you.

Go for it! The world and I love you!

Good morning, I hope this message finds you well. I am contacting you today to discuss a few things. Firstly, I would like to introduce myself. My name is [Name] and I am your host. Secondly, I would like to discuss the issue of negative emotions. I understand that you have been experiencing negative emotions, which is completely normal. However, I would like to suggest a few ways to help you gain control over these emotions. I look forward to hearing from you soon. Kind regards, [Name]

From your inquiries, I discern that you frequently recall unfavorable past experiences, which also impacts your learning state, and I comprehend your feelings of helplessness.

In your description, I note a positive indicator: "Sometimes I feel like I don't care about people and things, but then it comes back to the surface during special moments." This suggests that you are gradually developing coping mechanisms and adjusting your mentality through your own strength. When you feel less distressed, what do you do?

It is possible that when you reflect on past experiences, you tend to blame yourself for shortcomings. This tendency to self-reject and deny responsibility may contribute to your emotional distress. Additionally, your emotional state is influenced by how you perceive your experiences.

Every situation and experience has two sides, which can be viewed from two perspectives: a positive one and a negative one.

When you view past experiences through a negative lens, your emotions and feelings may manifest as a sense of helplessness and resentment. You may feel that you have been at a disadvantage and that your life has been negatively impacted.

However, if you alter your perspective and view your experiences in a more positive light, your emotions and feelings can be transformed. For example, you might say, "Although my past is regrettable, I have gained valuable insights from it. I have enhanced my personal growth and wisdom, and I am better equipped to protect myself and navigate future challenges." By adopting this mindset, you can potentially rekindle hope in your heart.

We also suggest some self-help methods for regulating negative emotions for your reference.

1. Engage in meditation exercises to enhance your awareness of your physical and mental state by focusing on your breathing and identifying thoughts. Daily emotions that are obstructed can be addressed through mindfulness. When we begin to relax, identify and organize these emotions, it helps to gain control over these thoughts and change them. It helps to process negative emotions and replace them with new, healthier thoughts.

2. Consider maintaining a gratitude journal as a means of self-reflection. For instance, you might note the presence of supportive family and friends in your life, and the value of your own circumstances in comparison to those who were abandoned by their parents at birth and lack the same level of social support. Focus on the positive aspects of your life. Recording and capturing these positive experiences can positively influence your overall outlook and mindset.

3. Your pain and confusion, in addition to yourself, are also best understood and experienced by your counselor. They are also the group of people who best understand the difficulties you are experiencing. Therefore, when you feel that you cannot be helped by yourself or laypeople, you can seek help from a professional counselor. Let them accompany you and help you uncover the emotional conflicts and root causes of depression within you, release them, and adjust your state of mind.

Best regards,

Hello, dear questioner!

Hi, I'm Yi Ming, your friendly mindfulness coach!

I'd be more than happy to go through this with you, and I really hope it will be comforting and inspiring for you.

1. Give yourself a break! These thoughts are just passing through.

I'm sure you understand what I mean!

I know it can be tough, but try not to think about them too much. The more you try not to think about them, the more they pop into your head.

So, whenever these thoughts come up, try not to control them, OK?

We all have these thoughts that annoy us, but we don't want to think about them.

It's so important to remember that the more we do this, the more these thoughts hurt us.

Let's try to look at them calmly, shall we?

You can't control it, so don't even try!

Just let the thoughts come and go naturally, okay?

There's something really interesting in psychology. It's called a paradoxical intervention.

That's right, give yourself permission to have these thoughts and think about the harm they might cause.

The more thorough, the better!

I really think you should give it a try!

Thoughts are like clouds in the sky: they come and go, my friend.

And we don't want it to come, but it's actually a good thing!

2. It might be helpful to try to sort out past traumas.

It's only natural to feel hurt when someone says or does something that hurts us.

So, from now on, I think it would be really helpful for you to try to look at it from a new perspective.

I know it can be hard to think about, but did they really mean to hurt you in the past?

Or is it just you guys?

Even though they've hurt us, there are still ways we can make ourselves feel better!

If blaming them doesn't help you feel better, there are other ways to cope.

For example, you could try writing down the past, writing out all the unhappiness and pain, even if it is to wish them all the retribution they deserve.

This is the wonderful healing power of writing!

It's so important to give our pain an outlet and let it flow. This will gradually stop it from constantly tormenting us.

It's so important to remember that what others say doesn't change us. We can choose to believe what others say or not. We can also choose to let others upset us or not. It's all about how we react to things.

It's important to remember that it's never anyone who truly wants to hurt us.

It's so important to remember that it's often ourselves who are the ones who are obsessed.

3. Try to take care of yourself, sweetheart.

We love our friends and family, but we could all do with caring for ourselves a little more.

If you ever feel like there's too much going on in your mind and you can't concentrate, you can always adjust and relax.

Just do it naturally, without forcing or denying yourself.

Instead, we can take a moment to see our emotions and give our hurting selves a good hug.

When we learn to soothe ourselves, these pains and frustrations will leave us.

And then there are folks who, after hurting themselves, are still stuck living with that person. We can always try to look on the bright side! For example, we can say, "I choose not to dwell on the past."

"I can be happy on my own, and I will be!"

It's so important to remember that we don't need to compare ourselves with others. We need to focus on living our own lives to the fullest!

Be your own biggest cheerleader!

If you're interested, you're more than welcome to read "It turns out that understanding is more important than love."

Please, just share these!

I love you, world! And I love you too!

The past is like a fly in the ointment, painful as hell. You have been through so much, perhaps a mountain of it, and it has given you a lot of trauma and pain. But you're getting through it! You also said that there are too many things going on in your head right now, so many things all jumbled together. But you're going to get through it!

It's so easy to let your personal time and energy reach a state of concentration! You want to study hard and work hard, but you can't do it yourself. That's okay! You don't have the clear-minded and persistent attitude to let yourself reach a state of concentration.

So, it's time to tackle those real issues head-on and see if they've been holding you back. Record them in a diary — it's your own personal historical record! It's better to let them stay on paper than in your mind.

Many emotions and sad things are very painful. But you can get through this! These traumas have already happened, and even if you have decided that you don't care, the past will still remain in your memory. This is something that is difficult to ignore, which means that the memories and emotions of the past will still come flooding back. But you can handle it!

As for the memories of the past and the people who passed through your life, it doesn't matter what happens to them. They're not really related to you anyway, so you can let them go with a smile on your face! It's fine with me if they're happy or sad. If other people keep spying on you, it's best to block them and delete your friends list so that they can't see you anymore.

You absolutely need to maintain a healthy boundary with the people and things of the past. No matter what happens in the future, you will remain the master of your own destiny. You don't need to get any closer to those who hurt you. I highly recommend that you seek psychological counseling to reconstruct your perceptions, reinterpret the trauma, become aware of your current strength and awakening, and cheer up!

ZQ?