Two months since the breakup, it's impossible for the other person to return, yet I still feel deeply heartbroken?

Hello, I'm Gu Yi. I'm modest and self-effacing.

Time is either big or small, depending on how we think about it.

Every encounter helps us grow.

Love is beautiful, but is the love we encounter the one that will stay with us? There is no answer. Meeting and staying with love requires luck. If not, we should take a proper view of our situation.

After a breakup, we know we can't get back together. We'll cry and feel sad. This is normal. It shows we have good memories. The sadness is a result of the past. It shows we're sentimental. Don't blame yourself. With the right guidance, you'll be fine.

We have awe for the past and anticipation for the future. Those who have been missed so far will always bring us something. Therefore, every encounter is meaningful.

How to get out of it.

Have the right attitude. The world is always changing.

People are born and die. Everything happens for a reason. If you miss an opportunity, you should treasure the good times. There will be more good times in the future. So can we let go?

When a relationship ends, it can feel like a way of life is ending too. Even if you stop contacting your ex, it can still feel lonely and like you have no one to turn to. It's also hard to change your habits so quickly, so try to make some new routines and arrangements to help you cope.

You will cry and delay your work because of sadness. This ending is not friendly, but you can still change your life.

It's not hard to accept reality and start over. As long as you have goals and a plan, you can achieve them.

Zhen Huan became part of the harem because she stopped loving. But did Ruyi's fate come about because she loved too much?

Love treats everyone differently. Forget the past.

Life goes on, and so do encounters.

People search for a lifetime, but they're looking for the right person and the right thing.

Being a practitioner is also suffering.

Best wishes!

If I may ask,

Hello! I wanted to reach out and express my understanding and support after reading your story. I can relate to the challenges you're facing, particularly the difficulty in concentrating on work due to the pain of a breakup. I'm confident you're committed to taking the necessary steps to move forward.

It is natural to experience pain when a relationship ends. Many people find it challenging to move on after a breakup, as they have invested a significant amount of emotional energy into the relationship. It is a common experience, and with time and resilience, individuals can gradually work through the pain and suffering.

This is what falling in love is like. No matter how beautiful it starts, it may end in a way that is painful for us. Since this is a fact of life, let's allow time to help us gradually accept reality and adjust our state of mind. Perhaps you can do something to relieve your painful emotions, for example:

1. It is important to accept your emotions. It is normal to feel miserable and unable to work because of a broken heart. With time, this state of mind will pass. It is important not to blame yourself.

2. It might be helpful to talk to someone you trust and share your feelings. When you gain the other person's understanding and support, you may find the strength to face it.

3. You might find it helpful to keep a diary and express your feelings in writing. This could be a way of recording all your emotions, the gains and losses you have experienced in this relationship, and the growth you need to achieve. When you feel better, you could look back over your diary and take comfort in the knowledge that you have made progress.

4. If you're feeling low and it's not convenient to talk about it, you might find it helpful to listen to music or doodle to help you feel a little better.

5. If you find yourself slipping into a negative mindset, you can gently remind yourself that you have the capacity to overcome it and that this phase will eventually pass.

6. It might be helpful to set yourself work and study goals, and to write them down and post them in a prominent place to remind yourself every day and motivate you to take action.

If I may make a suggestion, I believe you would benefit from reading the following books: "You will thank yourself for your hard work in the future," "May you become the best version of yourself," "Overcome inferiority complex," and "The courage to be hated." I truly believe that your hard work will help you meet a better version of yourself!

I hope you can find a way out of your current situation soon and find happiness. Thank you!

Hello.

Thank you for inviting me. I saw your description and I want to hug you.

Our broken hearts prevent us from working hard, and we feel our condition worsening. Despite our anxiety, we remain stuck in this state.

The questioner said the other person has "no chance" of coming back, which means there's no hope of us getting back together. We know the outcome, but we're still missing the other person.

First of all, this is a normal situation. It shows that we have truly invested in the relationship. We have love, and we will grow even if we are in pain.

We can't let go of the other person for the time being because we know the outcome. We subconsciously can't let go because we initially invested too much emotion and energy.

We must get through it. We know that constantly deceiving ourselves like this actually drains us.

It's challenging, I know. You're going to miss the person you've given your heart to. But you have to tell yourself from another perspective that it's better to keep the good memories than to blame and hate each other.

From this perspective, it is clear that after a breakup, not getting entangled is for the betterment of loving oneself.

After a breakup, you can't be friends, but you don't have to become enemies either.

I firmly believe that partners who turn love into hate are hurting each other and losing their dignity and decency.

We have seen many couples in the entertainment industry act like enemies after breaking up. This kind of behavior only provides the audience with something to talk about. Who cares who is right and who is wrong? Besides, even an impartial judge would have difficulty deciding a family matter, let alone the parties themselves, who may not be able to explain it clearly.

From this perspective, it's clear that exposing the other person's "ugly face" only leads to a loss of face for both parties. It's time to move on and be like traveling companions from now on.

You must move on from a breakup without dragging your feet or harboring resentment or hatred. Preserving your dignity is essential.

This is loving yourself.

The original poster is affected at work because he is thinking too much about the breakup. He needs to shift his focus.

Here's a tip for the questioner:

We know that behavior and thoughts can influence each other. You can control your behavior, but you can't control your thoughts.

Sign an agreement with yourself on paper. You will think about it every day, but you can give yourself a break. Set a corresponding number of times or time. For example, think about it 10 times between 7 pm and 8 pm, and then start to compensate yourself by practicing towards a certain goal. This could be yoga, fitness, playing sports, etc. Get moving.

Exercise will help you build self-confidence and get over the pain of a broken heart.

Read the book "After the Breakup, Become a Better You." It explains in detail how to get out of a past relationship and move on with your life. It not only analyzes the reasons and significance of each step, but also provides practical methods.

This book is a must-read for anyone looking to gain insight into why some relationships end, what true love is, and how to spot the warning signs in a seemingly good relationship. It also offers practical advice on how to start a healthy relationship. The author's analysis is detailed and thought-provoking, and it's a valuable resource for anyone seeking to understand themselves and their relationships better.

I am confident that my answer will be helpful to the original poster. Thank you all for your time. I am Jiusi, on Yixinli, and I love you all.

Good day.

As a mindfulness coach, I believe that learning is the greatest asset to the human body.

From your description, I can discern the distress and desire for change that you are experiencing.

I will not delve into the specifics of the challenges you have faced following the dissolution of your relationship. However, I do have three pieces of advice for you:

Firstly, I suggest you accept your current situation.

This will help you to think more clearly about your next steps.

You indicated that the separation has been two months, during which you have experienced elevated levels of distress. This has affected your work performance, which has caused you concern. It is understandable that your state of mind would be affected by the separation, as many individuals in similar circumstances experience sadness and difficulty letting go. When you are feeling sad, you try to be rational and not take love so seriously, but you find this challenging. It is important to accept your state of mind and recognize that you are experiencing a period of confusion and anxiety. This can be a time of feeling overwhelmed and temporarily at a loss as to what to do. It is beneficial to focus on other things to give your mind a break from negative emotions.

It is crucial to accept oneself as a first step towards effecting change. This may seem paradoxical, but it is the only way to embrace the status quo. Change is contingent upon allowing for no change.

Secondly, I recommend that you adopt a rational perspective on your own situation.

Rational thinking can assist in gaining a deeper understanding of oneself and the surrounding reality.

To gain a rational perspective on the situation, it is essential to:

First, it is important to recognize that the breakup is a fact that cannot be changed.

It is possible that you are still holding out hope for the relationship to be salvaged, but it is important to acknowledge that the breakup is a reality. Regardless of your feelings on the matter, it is not possible to change the situation. You have also mentioned that the other party is unlikely to return, which means that you need to accept the situation and move on, even if it is not what you would prefer.

It is important to note that this does not imply complete isolation or the absence of sadness. Given the integration of the relationship into one's life, complete severance is not a realistic option. It is understandable that letting go may be challenging, but it is essential to exercise caution to prevent negative emotions from disrupting one's work and daily life.

Secondly, it is important to recognise that the current situation can be altered, as you have the capacity to make changes.

When you take the initiative to act on your own behalf, your inner state will change.

A rational assessment of the situation may help to resolve any negative emotions.

I recommend that you focus on your own needs and consider how you can improve your situation.

When you objectively assess the situation, you may also be able to identify a solution. At this juncture, it is important to focus on your own efforts and give them your best.

For instance, when you are experiencing a lack of motivation to work, you can remind yourself that regardless of your emotional state, the other person is not coming back, and you should not be overly affected by this. After repeatedly providing yourself with positive suggestions such as this, you may feel motivated to make a change, and your mood will improve.

It is also recommended to confide in trusted family and friends. This can help to alleviate negative emotions, as sharing these feelings with others can have a healing effect. Additionally, they can provide advice and support, which can facilitate change.

It is also possible to learn to take responsibility and be accountable for one's actions. This involves considering the potential consequences of continuing to be negative. For example, if an individual's work performance surpasses their own expectations, they may experience feelings of sadness, which could affect their work and, subsequently, their income and quality of life. Additionally, they may become self-limiting. After identifying these potential consequences, it may be possible to let go of the matter and devote oneself fully to one's work, which could lead to an improvement in overall well-being.

You may also find it beneficial to read some related books to help you grow, such as After the Breakup, Become a Better Version of Yourself and Psychology of Breakups.

Once you begin taking action, you will naturally start to resolve all kinds of negative emotions because action is often the best way to overcome them.

I hope this information is helpful to you. If you would like to discuss further, please click on "Find a Coach" at the bottom of the page, and I will contact you directly.

Hello!

Thanks for asking this question and trusting us to answer it. We get it—you're going through a lot right now.

I want to tell you, my friend, that it's totally normal to feel all kinds of emotions, like grief, shock, and fear, when you're facing a breakup that's final and has ended the relationship.

We use the word "very, very" to show that we're all human with emotions. When something like a breakup happens, it can cause a big emotional reaction.

And it often takes a long time to mourn and grieve the aftershocks of this earthquake before we can return to peace and repair.

So, all emotional reactions are normal, and this is a journey that requires time to repair the aftershocks of a breakup.

If you try to force yourself to be in the present moment or to immediately adjust to a fast track of nothing happening and to be positive and optimistic, it's almost impossible to do so. Even if we're forced to do so, forcing ourselves to "relax," forcing ourselves not to dwell on the pain, and forcing a smile are all very cruel to ourselves and are not in line with the normal laws of humanity.

Right now, let's try to let go of this impatience and any worries like "all my peers have achieved more than me." Instead, let's focus on the part of us that's injured right now.

Yes, we're hurt. We need more energy to take care of ourselves, and we need a little time to let our emotions catch up. Accepting who we are right now is the key to healing.

Yes, we're hurt. We need more energy to take care of ourselves and give our emotions a chance to catch up. Accepting who we are now is the key to healing.

Once we've got all that out of the way, we can really move on to the next stage: relaxation, recollection, and release.

In other words, our emotions have caused a bit of a cognitive dissonance in the brain. You can find a place you feel safe in, talk to a friend, or seek professional counseling to release our sadness, grief, and other emotions, and soothe our own wounded hearts.

In other words, our emotions have caused a cognitive dissonance in the brain. You can find a safe place, talk to a friend, or seek professional counseling to release sadness, grief, and other emotions and soothe your wounded heart.

Once you've gone through the stages of grief, pain, and anger, you'll probably enter a period of reflection.

You can also think about what your last question, "How can I take love less seriously?," really means.

I get it. You've invested a lot of effort in this relationship, and it's been frustrating. It seems like if you could take it less seriously and not put so much effort into it, you'd feel better.

I know all this, but we also know in our hearts that there's an emotional need behind this relationship that we haven't fulfilled yet.

If you'd like to talk more about what this breakup means to you, you can find a professional counselor who can help.

Let's look at what feelings this person evokes in you, what old patterns from your past he seems to represent, and what unmet emotional needs you're really seeking.

Often, the person we find in an intimate relationship is also the person we unconsciously want to help us heal.

This is a later story, and it's quite complex. In short, after you've gone through this journey of repair and healing, you'll find that the value it has brought you has more than made up for the breakup itself.

When we finally emerge from the emotional swamp and see a new turn for the better, we will rebuild the strength of our inner lives.

Yes, you're still you, but you've been sorted out and are different. Your life has risen to a new level, and you've begun to break out of your old patterns and enter a new world.

By that point, you'll have connected with your past self and be on your way to a new, shining you.

You'll see that the amazing thing about life is that it uses tough moments to nudge us to make changes. And we have the power to heal and save ourselves.

You'll see that the amazing thing about life is that it uses tough moments to nudge us to make changes. And we have the power to heal and save ourselves.

It's not an easy process, but it's worth putting in the effort.

I also suggest reading "Becoming a Better Version of Yourself After a Breakup."

I also suggest reading "Becoming a Better Version of Yourself After a Breakup."

When you're ready, take the plunge and start this healing journey!

When you're ready, I encourage you to take the plunge and start this healing journey!

Wishing you the best!

Good morning,

I can see your question, and I empathize with your emotions, feelings of helplessness, and pain. I understand your desire to break free from this state and live your life to the fullest. Dear hug,

I would like to share a quote from the book Yes to Life:

Whatever the circumstances may be, it seems that things didn't work out the way you had hoped, and it's likely that they won't in the future either. It's understandable that you might still have some hope and expectations, but it's important to recognize that they're probably not going to be fulfilled.

Perhaps it would be best to let it go. After all, nothing can change the situation.

However, it is important to recognize that these thoughts can have a detrimental impact on our well-being, gradually eroding our energy and sanity.

Perhaps it would be helpful to come back to reality. It seems that your dreams have been shattered and dissipated, which may have inspired your pain and fear.

It would be beneficial to gain an understanding of the unconscious mechanisms that may be causing you pain and fear. If you can identify these mechanisms and work to overcome them, they may no longer have the same influence over your life.

It might be helpful to remember that you were once so full of life and happiness, at least until you met him. Perhaps you have also had other relationships and had beautiful dreams about that person.

Perhaps it wasn't perfect, but it was good, wasn't it? Have you ever considered that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with that person?

It is still possible, even if it seems unlikely. You can still get your life back on track without him and even be happy again.

Perhaps, if you allow your imagination to run wild, you might even see the possibility of falling in love again.

I want to reassure you that breaking up does not mean "you are not good enough." You are valuable.

As the quote from the book above suggests, before you met him, you were living well on your own, and it wasn't painful at all!

It's understandable that after experiencing so much and learning so much, you might feel like you've ended up back where you started. It's not as if you've leveled up and gained experience points, but rather that your health bar is empty and you're reluctant to rest and regain your health. It's possible that you've just been in a relationship, and it must have been really hard. You might benefit from taking a break.

It's important to remember that breaking up doesn't mean anything negative. It's not because you're bad, but rather that you and your partner are both very good, but you're going in different directions next.

You may choose to take a short break from your relationship. This could be a good time to focus on your own happiness and wellbeing, and to work towards achieving your goals. It could also be an opportunity to reflect on your relationship and to consider making some new choices.

"Honey, you're great, you've done so much already, and you can take as much time as you need to take care of yourself."

It might be helpful to express it in a positive way.

"Why am I so unhappy?" or "Is there anything I can do to feel better or improve my situation?" You could also suggest to a friend that you spend the May holiday together doing something enjoyable.

Perhaps we can approach life in a more proactive way. If you feel bad, it might be helpful to ask yourself what you want and then do something to make you feel better.

It could be said that relationships act as a kind of mirror, helping us to improve and adjust ourselves.

In this mirror of relationships, we may observe our own discomfort and also the unusual behavior of others. Have you ever considered the possibility that you met, got to know, and fell in love with this person for a reason?

It's not simply a matter of bad luck or stubbornness.

Rather, it could be said that the way we see our parents' relationship, the way we get along with them, the way we interact with them, and the feelings and emotions we experience in the process all influence the kind of partner we will find. So, might I suggest that we consider ways to unlock these patterns?

Over the course of her career, Wu Zhihong has consulted on numerous cases and reflected on her experiences. She has developed a nuanced understanding of the ways in which family and romantic relationships can be challenging and cause discomfort.

At the end, it also proposes ways and methods on how to grow and become a better version of yourself. These two books are "Why Home Hurts" and "Why Love Hurts." After reading them, you may find that you gain a deeper understanding of yourself, learn how to heal yourself through positive actions, and experience more happiness and joy.

I hope my answer is helpful to you. I wish you a good night!