What should I do if I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for six years and recently gradually feel like I don't love him anymore?

Hello!

I totally get it! I can imagine how anxious, confused, and bewildered you must feel about entering into marriage after a long-term relationship.

Psychology has identified three main elements of love: passion, intimacy, and commitment. Passion is the most emotional element of love and is what keeps love fresh and mutually attractive. To maintain passion, you need to keep your love life exciting and novel. This will help you keep your passion alive and your love fresh. This is an irresistible law, but it does not mean that passion diminishes and love disappears. Deep love is a connection between two people at the deepest level.

First, let yourself relax and enjoy a calm and soothing mood!

After years of dating, you and your partner have formed a wonderful, habitual pattern between you. Now that you are finally getting married, it's time for a change! It's inevitable that there will be some emotional changes, but it's also an exciting time for new beginnings. Women in particular are prone to fear and anxiety before marriage, and will have a lot of worries, worrying about the responsibilities of married life, etc. When there is not enough inner security, they will think of escape and feel tired and unloving. But you can overcome these feelings by focusing on the present and appreciating your partner.

Focus on the present and experience your true inner feelings!

After six years of being in love, you must have experienced a lot and know each other well. But don't worry! You'll get through this. The current inner uncertainty is mainly due to worries about the future, in addition to the fading of passion over time. In fact, no one can find the truest self in the past and the future, and what should be focused on is the current feelings.

So, on the premise of being relaxed, without dwelling on the past or worrying about the future, appreciate the little things between you in the present moment! Appreciate your tacit understanding, mutual understanding, and tolerance, and the depth of your emotional connection through small things.

Communication is key! Talk to your partner more and experience the amazing feeling of interaction and feedback between you.

You can express your inner fears, anxieties, worries, and indecision to your partner in an honest and open manner, and you can also directly express your emotions. But remember, when expressing emotions, don't express them with emotion, and try to communicate with the other person in a calm manner without accusations or blame. At the same time, learn to listen to the other person, feel their emotions, and experience the feeling of interaction and feedback between you. Passion may not be easily present or felt all the time, but the deep connection between the hearts of people who truly love each other can be felt with the heart!

I really hope Hongyu's reply is helpful! Thanks so much for asking!

Hello, question asker!

You've been with your boyfriend for six years. How many six years does one have in life? It's clear to me that after a long relationship, you've reached the stage of marriage. I firmly believe that you two are a pair who are very much in love.

I believe I know why you feel this way. You have undoubtedly experienced many ups and downs over the past six years. Despite all the challenges, you have emerged stronger together. You have even been able to raise several pets. I believe people who can raise pets are kind. You two are both so kind. You said that your current feelings with him are like those of friends and roommates. I interpret this as having gone from the passionate stage to a very stable friendship and affection.

When you're in love, there are always intense moments. It's a time when both parties are intoxicated, with hormones secreting heavily. It's not enough to be together almost every day. That was the most beautiful moment, when both parties felt like the sky was falling and the earth was shaking, and their feelings for each other would be as stable as Mount Tai.

You have to understand that human energy is limited. It is impossible to feel this way all the time. Passion will inevitably fade over time. You have definitely had a passionate period. Now, you have entered a bottleneck period. You are no longer just a couple. You are a family.

Your relationship is based on a family bond, which means it's not just about blood ties. It's about commitment, love, and a shared future. You're discussing marriage, which shows you're ready to take the next step. I admire your strength and resilience. You're truly beautiful.

Your relationship is rock solid. I envy you. Let me start by sending you a sincere blessing!

Next, let's talk about why you feel this way. Now, do you truly love him? Based on my experience, I can say with confidence that:

Let me be clear: if we want to enter into marriage in the future, we have already made a commitment to each other. Then, in the future, we can say that we both have responsibilities. In other words, we both definitely belong to each other. Although it is very common for us to get divorced nowadays, getting married gives us a lot of protection.

You're at a very stable stage in your relationship and have made a commitment to each other. It's normal to feel anxious before entering this stage. You know your partner belongs to you. You know she loves you.

I know I love him. I think many people will have this thought before they get married!

Marriage is a lifelong commitment, and it's only natural to feel confused and helpless at this time.

You feel lost and helpless right now, but I know you'll keep your promise for the rest of your life once you make it. I truly believe that. Look at yourself from this perspective and see if you're a good match.

Now that I can calmly think about this issue, I know it is also a very good thing, which is conducive to a happy life in the future. What about you? You should talk to a few friends and family members about it. You should tell your close friends your true thoughts. If your financial situation permits, you should find a reliable psychological counselor to consult about your future life.

I am certain that your serious attitude towards marriage will ensure that your future choices will not disappoint you. I wish you a wonderful life.

The world and I love you!

OK, hello, thanks for asking. I'm Coffee.

I am confident that my answer will provide you with some valuable ideas and hints.

You must be confused right now. You don't know which way to choose.

You must decide: was it giving up or getting married? It may seem easy to give up on your six-year emotion-and-strength-in-interpersonal-relationships-15900.html" target="_blank">relationship, but it would hurt the other person.

You also have an emotional component to consider. When it comes to marriage, you seem hesitant again.

You and he are more like friends and roommates. You simply can't find the feeling of passion and infatuation anymore.

You are now torn, trying to sort out your thoughts and make a decision that is good for you. This shows that you are cautious and responsible about this important event in your life.

You want to make a decision that is friendly to him, to you, and even to both families and your friends.

Think about it. Did you feel passion and infatuation when you were first in love? What was it like when you first started dating?

You've been in love for too long. The relationship has passed the stage of passion and infatuation.

You know each other very well. It's more like friends and roommates.

Meanwhile, I firmly believe that if it's a truly loving relationship or a passionate affair, there should be a strong sense of dependence, a desire to be together, and a sense of happiness. This is a far superior kind of relationship. However, your current thoughts are that you want to escape.

You're not sure if you'll regret marrying him. So have you met someone else who makes your heart race?

It is true that after a long relationship, the thought of marriage can arise. But there is also a kind of good love, where they say they are in love together and then look forward to getting married. When they get married, they will feel very happy and moved, and want to devote their lives to each other.

Tell me, do you feel that way?

We need to sort out our thoughts. When you were in a relationship with him, was it because of friendship or love?

Think about it. In the six years you've been together, do you want to spend the next few decades with him? Especially if you have children and you form a warm family together, do you like this kind of family?

How is the relationship between your two families? In China, getting married is not just a matter of two people. It is also a union of two families.

Tell me, do you like his family? Or does he like yours?

You need to think about whether your two families are integrated. These are all things you need to consider.

We all make mistakes. Sometimes we mistake friendship for love, and sometimes we miss out on good relationships.

We need more information and news. Recollect the past six years from the time you fell in love until now. What have you gained?

What will you give? It's up to you to decide whether it's worth it.

You need to decide if you want to spend the next few decades of your life with him, just as you have spent the first six years. Find the answer for yourself.

Six years of relationship, even if you are just friends, is not something that can be easily severed. It will make you very torn, and if the relationship is broken up, it will hurt the other party as well, especially after six years.

You want to make a careful decision about this matter. You already know the answer, and you just want a confirming voice.

You may want to hear the opinions of different people before making up your mind. This is undoubtedly a difficult decision.

You have to make a decision either way. Think about it: what will you gain and what will you lose?

This is the kind of family and relationship you want. It will nourish you.

Ask yourself: will it make your life happier in the future? Approach the matter with these questions in mind to gain more ideas.

It's not that simple. You have to consider the pros and cons.

Find the answer you're sure of and then make a decision.

OK, thanks for asking. I'm Coffee. You need to hear your inner voice.

Respect your feelings. Find your own answer.

Be firm. Get a bright future.

The world and I love you.

Hello, I'm Jianlin, a psychological counselor. From your question, I can tell that you and your boyfriend have been in a long-distance relationship for six years. You've gotten used to this kind of life, and it's been pretty calm. When you were preparing to get married, you suddenly felt panic and even doubted yourself a little. You're not sure if he's the one you need, if it's true love, and why there's no joy, but rather a sense of unease.

I get it. You've been together six years, and you've been living together the whole time. At this point, you should treat this as a family problem and an emotional problem, not just a relationship. You've already passed that stage where you had expectations of each other and a sense of mystery.

As you said, living together is just a matter of habit! We say that marriage has a seven-year itch, but we don't mean that there is necessarily something wrong after seven years. It's just that after being married for a few years, the passion of love has transformed into the mutual support of family ties. You no longer feel anything when you are together, but when you are apart, you miss each other terribly!

You've clearly been through a passionate period and are now moving towards a more family-oriented, mutually supportive dynamic. You're thinking about getting married, but you're suddenly not as excited or looking forward to it as you once were. You're even experiencing a lack of heartbeat. So, you have doubts and even panic. You ask yourself, "If I get married, how will I live after the wedding? Will I not have everyone's passionate heart or the excitement of looking forward to being with each other?"

There are all kinds of question marks in your mind, right? In fact, you might as well look at your relationship from this perspective: first, can you leave each other now?

From what you've said, it seems like you're not sure if you can leave each other. And it's been so stable for six years! Have you found any admirers apart from each other?

Of course, it's not right either. It's just psychological doubts that arise when you're about to get married. You just need an answer, right?

Okay, let's go over this together. Your relationship has been stable for six years and has changed from love to affectionate familiarity. It's inseparable! You just can't find the excitement and inner expectation of getting married, so you're a little hesitant about your choice.

If the emotional foundation is there, it's stable, and you care about each other, then why are you feeling so anxious and excited? Is it even panic?

We often have two people in a relationship, whether they are a couple or a married couple with children. It requires both parties to work hard at it, to treat the other person as a customer. Would you still worry that they would run away? No, because you would find a way to keep them as this customer. At this time, we often hear that two people need to have a sense of novelty together, to give each other little surprises from time to time, a sexy piece of lingerie, or to change the style a bit, to add a bit of romantic mood, so that each other has a feeling of infatuation, rather than just the same words, the same style, or knowing each other's next move intimately!

How would you feel if you had to eat celery every day for six years? It wouldn't be a very pleasant experience!

Right? When we think about this, it seems like we're starting to understand something.

A stable relationship also needs to be nurtured and full of new experiences and surprises, right? When we find the reason, can we understand and let go of this kind of mood?

Have you found a solution? It's clear that we started our married life as a couple before we were ready. We're happy, and in this situation, getting married is inevitable, and managing it is also necessary. Is this also the best way to find each other's feelings again?

I hope these answers to your questions help you find a way to solve your problems and rekindle the spark of love so that you can be happy forever. Thanks for meeting with me!

The question can be summarized as follows: "Marriage is the grave of love." Some may be concerned that this viewpoint will dissuade the questioner from pursuing marriage. However, there is no need for concern. Please continue reading.

The process of falling in love involves two individuals meeting, getting to know each other, and developing romantic feelings. This process is also characterized by emotional fluctuations. At the outset of a relationship, both individuals experience a strong desire for this love and anticipate spending time together under the moonlight.

In the real world, both individuals have their own responsibilities. In addition to work obligations, they may have to work overtime. When combined with other factors, the time they spend together romantically may also decrease. Conversely, after a tiring day, they may not feel inclined to engage in romantic activities. Instead, they may prefer to rest and recuperate, which leaves little time and energy for spending quality time together.

If this situation persists over time, the initial passion for love in both individuals' hearts will diminish, and the relationship will evolve into a more peaceful and calm dynamic. At this stage, the nature of the relationship may resemble that of a family bond.

The questioner has been with her boyfriend for six years, and I'm confident she has her own personal experience to draw upon. Marriage is similar to this kind of life where two people get along in a family-like manner. It is equivalent to the end of a passionate life, so it is called the "tomb of love."

On the other hand, marriage is to protect and ensure that love can continue more stably. It is equivalent to putting a "protective shield" on love, which allows the two people to enjoy love freely within this "protective shield." There is a common saying that if there is no grave of marriage, love can only be a lonely ghost.

The confusion and doubts in the questioner's heart may reflect their inner needs. Alternatively, the questioner may simply desire a passionate life of love, rather than a stable family life through marriage. It is also possible that the questioner has an underlying fear of marriage, which may need to be addressed. Once the underlying message is identified, it will be possible to understand the source of the issues and communicate with the partner to resolve them.

Hello, question asker. I can see that you're feeling unsure about this relationship. There's a term for that kind of anxiety: pre-marital anxiety. I don't know if you've heard of it.

I'm Little Flying Fish Floater. I'm a trainee psychological counselor and a home education instructor.

Let's talk about your current situation and I'll give you some advice.

I hope this helps to ease your anxiety.

1. You've been together for six years and have always lived together.

First of all, congratulations! After marriage, you'll have someone to keep you company for the rest of your life, and you'll be protected by the law.

You can live a happy life together. You've been together with your boyfriend for six years and have been living together.

Have you ever had any disagreements? Would your boyfriend help you take care of a pet if you had one?

A man who can raise a pet with you is a good father material.

On the bright side, you won't have to shoulder everything on your own after having children in the future. As long as you can bring it up, he will be there to lend you a hand.

You can take care of your pet together. And of course, the fruit of your love, he can take care of it with you even better.

After all this time dating and being together, I imagine you've had your fair share of conflicts! How did you resolve them?

You're about to get married. What are you confused about now?

What are you concerned about? It's normal to not feel the presence of love after six years together.

Over the past six years, you've gotten to know each other's habits pretty well. You probably know each other better than you know yourself!

What's there to worry about? In fact, during the long period of your courtship,

You've already turned love into affection, which is probably why you don't feel the love anymore.

It might be fair to say that you've become a bit numb to love.

Secondly, when it comes to marriage, you're not sure if you still love him.

You want to take some time to explore your feelings and see if you still love him.

?‍♂️How far along are you in planning your wedding? You've been together for six years, so you must be at least 25 years old, right?

Who proposed marriage? In fact, after being in love for so long,

You've been in love for so long that loving each other has become a habit. Your bodies will even start to show each other love without you even thinking about it.

You can probably guess how much you really love each other.

How do you know if you love someone? The simplest way is to...

You can take a few days apart from him and tell yourself, "It's over, let's go!" to see how you feel.

It's worth noting that the love that has lasted so long may not be as genuine as you think. The thought of breaking up can also be a significant emotional trigger.

I can see where you're coming from. Marriage isn't as free and easy as being in love.

Marriage is a responsibility, and falling in love is something that only two people can do.

Marriage is a two-family thing. You and your partner get along well.

However, there's bound to be some friction between the two families, so it's important to be prepared to resolve any issues that arise.

I think that after being in a relationship for so long, both sets of parents have met and gotten to know each other's children. If there were any objections, I don't think you would have gotten to this point.

You shouldn't worry about this aspect so much.

I'm not sure what your original family structure was like, and I don't know if he's had a negative impact on you.

Are you feeling a little apprehensive about getting married? If you watched your parents when you were young and felt that they were not happy,

It's normal to have some pre-wedding jitters when you're about to tie the knot. After all, when you've been in love for so long, loving each other has become a habit.

If you spend a week apart, you'll know whether you still love him or not. You'll probably miss him and feel a bit nostalgic.

You can try this simple method: take a moment to reflect and see if you still love each other.

Although you just planned to get married, the love between you has already turned into a sense of responsibility.

It's just a matter of getting the official marriage certificate from the government. Think about it. If you don't mention marriage,

Is it possible for you to spend the rest of your lives together? Perhaps you're concerned about how your boyfriend will act once you're married.

It's not as good as it was. Think about it. You two have been together for six years, and he's formed habits.

Take care of yourself. You have already been taken for granted by her. In fact, apart from worrying that you no longer love her,

I'm also concerned that your boyfriend may not love you anymore. If he's willing to marry you after six years of being in love, that means he's a responsible man.

If you don't love each other, you probably stopped loving each other a long time ago.

And you don't have to wait until this time of day. This is a good time to have a chat with your mother.

Have a chat with your mum about her views on marriage. See if she can share some of her expertise in managing a marriage.

It's important to remember that there's still a lot to learn. Just because you have a marriage certificate doesn't mean you're automatically good at running a marriage.

There is another way. You can recall the entire process of your courtship every night.

Of course, there were lots of lovely moments during the six years. You can't possibly remember them all in one night.

Remembering these happy times can help you rediscover what you really feel.

Do you still love them? If you don't resent what you did back then,

Instead, look for the good in every situation and smile at every sweet moment. That will be enough proof that you still love.

It's just that the love is deeper and stronger. It's the kind of love that builds up over time.

If both people are happy, it can be hard to get that buried love back.

?‍♀️The above is my analysis and advice on this matter for you. I hope it helps.

One psychology: the world and I love you.

Greetings!

As a heart exploration coach, I believe that learning is the most valuable asset of the human body.

From your description, it is evident that you are experiencing a state of inner turmoil, accompanied by a plethora of conflicting emotions and a sense of uncertainty about the underlying cause of your distress.

I will not delve into the potential difficulties that may arise when contemplating marriage with a partner with whom one has been in a relationship for six years and questioning one's genuine feelings for them. Instead, I will provide three pieces of advice for your consideration.

Firstly, it would be beneficial to reflect on your personal criteria for a suitable partner and evaluate whether this individual aligns with them.

Given that individuals choose to be in a relationship with someone who meets their criteria for a partner, it is essential to identify one's own criteria and assess whether the prospective partner aligns with them.

It is important to note that there is no such thing as a perfect partner or perfect person. In order to create reasonable and objective selection criteria for a potential partner, it is essential to identify one's priorities and consider what is of primary, secondary, tertiary, and even lesser importance. This process allows for the formulation of criteria that are both reasonable and objective, which can ultimately assist in determining whether a potential partner is an appropriate choice.

Secondly, it is recommended that the following four aspects be considered in order to ascertain whether the love in question is indeed genuine.

The presence of these criteria allows one to distinguish between mere infatuation and the genuine emotion of love.

Firstly, it is important to ascertain whether there is a strong emotional bond between the two parties.

Secondly, when the couple is together, are they willing to respond to each other in a positive manner?

Thirdly, it is important to ascertain whether the other individual is perceived as a unique and exceptional partner, or if they are considered to be the sole individual with whom a romantic relationship is desired.

Fourthly, if one elects to remain in the relationship, it is imperative to ascertain whether the decision is rooted in genuine love or if the individual in question serves a utilitarian purpose.

Furthermore, the aforementioned four aspects can assist in discerning whether he genuinely exhibits affectionate feelings towards you. This may also facilitate your awareness of your own sentiments towards him.

It is once again recommended that visualization be employed to ascertain the veracity of one's feelings for the individual in question.

For example, one can attempt to envision a hypothetical separation and then ascertain whether one would be able to accept such a scenario. This exercise may help to determine whether one would experience feelings of sadness and distress, or whether one would maintain admiration for the individual in question, a sense of longing to remain in their company, and confidence in the future together. If these emotions and sentiments persist, it is likely that the relationship holds significant value for the individual. Conversely, if these feelings dissipate, it may indicate a lack of genuine love. In such instances, it is advisable to allow time for reflection and to avoid hasty decisions, such as marriage, to ascertain whether the relationship can be salvaged.

In general, one can attempt to ascertain whether they truly love their partner by identifying their own criteria for selecting a spouse, evaluating the nature of their relationship based on four key aspects, and contemplating the potential implications of a potential breakup.

It is also recommended to engage in open communication with trusted family members and friends to gain insight into one's true feelings and to solicit their opinions and suggestions. This approach can facilitate the dissipation of negative emotions, as they tend to subside when expressed and discussed. Additionally, it can assist in making informed decisions, as an external perspective may offer a more objective assessment of one's suitability for marriage.

It is my hope that this response will prove beneficial to you. Should you wish to engage in further communication, you are invited to click on the option entitled "Find a coach to interpret – online conversation" located at the foot of this page. This will enable me to communicate with you on an individual basis.

Hello.

We've been living together for six years. We've been thinking about getting married, but I've started to question whether I really love him. I'm confused. How should I explore my inner self?

Let's sort this out together.

After six years together, the initial passion has transformed into attachment. The aura around each other has long since worn off, and what is presented to us is a more realistic version of the other person.

We must distinguish between passion and love.

The initial stage of love is passion, which lasts for a maximum of three years, and usually for 1.5 years. After the passion phase, you enter the attachment phase, which is long-lasting and requires both parties to maintain their commitment and work hard at it.

If you don't see specific actions and responsibilities linked to the word "love," it's difficult to understand whether you love someone or whether they love themselves.

You have to decide if you want to continue living a passionate life. If you feel that the other person no longer loves you as much as they did at the beginning, that's a factor, too.

It is normal during the attachment period to sometimes feel more like friends or roommates than lovers. This indicates that you need to increase intimacy and have some intimate space that belongs to the two of you. You can go on a trip together, do housework or exercise together, etc.

After six years together, you may not agree with the things you dislike about your partner, but you can still tolerate them. If you can't tolerate them, it's time to face the fact that you no longer love each other.

Some people feel anxious or fearful before marriage. This is because marriage is fundamentally different from dating.

Marriage is bound by responsibilities, and there will undoubtedly be conflicts with family members from both sides, as well as with raising children. In contrast, dating is relatively simple: if it doesn't work out, you can always split up.

We must not allow our worries about married life to cause us stress and make us feel that we are limited in our ability to love each other and no longer want to love.

You must be prepared for the following problems that may arise after marriage: finance, power, sex, and each other's families. Read the book "If Only You Knew Before Marriage" to learn more.

I am confident that this will be helpful to you. Best regards!

The questioner is thinking about getting married and wondering if she really loves him. Would she have thought about this if she hadn't been thinking about getting married?

We've been together for six years, living together and raising a few pets. Sometimes I feel like we're more like friends or roommates than lovers.

What kind of connection is the "lover" the questioner is referring to? Is it like how when you don't see each other for a day, a year feels like three years?

Or is there something else going on?

The questioner has these thoughts, maybe without realizing that such expectations are unrealistic and shouldn't be pursued. In reality, very few people can achieve them.

It's not that common for a relationship to last long enough to progress from just being "lovers" to marriage.

"Recently, we've been thinking about getting married, but I've started to wonder if I really love him. I'm so confused. How should I explore my inner self?"

If you don't bring up marriage, would the questioner think about this question? Is the questioner worried and confused about getting married, or about whether or not they "really love him"?

Maybe the questioner is a little worried about getting married. They're wondering if married life will be as carefree as the six years of living together they've experienced so far. They're worried that getting married will take away some of their power to choose and their freedom, while at the same time they'll have to take on more responsibilities and obligations.

I think you might feel it's time to get married after six years of living together. The questioner might have come here to ask this question because they want to feel more certain.

I really hope my reply helps you out, and I'm happy if it's useful. Best wishes!

Hello, I'm Xin'an Zhi.

You've been with your boyfriend for six years, and he recently brought up marriage, but you're questioning your feelings for him. You can feel your confusion, conflict, helplessness, and frustration in the text.

You're willing to come to the platform to seek help, which shows you care about and value this relationship.

Can you tell me where the doubt about love came from?

Can you tell me a bit about your family background? How did your parents get along, and what was their relationship like?

How did you and your boyfriend meet? What made you attracted to him?

After six years together, how would you describe the dynamic between you and your partner? Have there been any changes in the way you interact with each other since you first started dating?

If so, whose attitude changed, or did both parties change? How did your feelings change during this period?

The text says that it feels more like roommates than lovers. When did this feeling start? What are the specific things that make you feel this way, and how do you react to it?

So, in your view, what sets apart roommates from lovers?

I'm a little confused that you only mentioned marriage after being together for six years. Is there a special reason?

Did you both take the initiative? Or did you both have thoughts or needs in this regard?

Did you both feel like it was time to get married when you brought up marriage this time, or did you bring it up because something had happened?

What was your initial response?

What are your thoughts on marriage? Are you looking forward to it, or are you a bit nervous?

Are you feeling any fear or worry?

After six years together, do you feel love, understanding, support, respect, and tolerance for each other?

In your description, you have a few pets. Are your attitudes towards them consistent?

You might want to ask yourself, "Am I questioning marriage or this person?" You could also ask your boyfriend to have an honest conversation with you and tell him what you're thinking and feeling.

Everyone is the expert on their own life and their own problems because they have first-hand experience and real feelings about them. So, you need to explore the answers for yourself.

If you're willing to face the problem head-on and really dig deep to understand your feelings, needs, and expectations, you'll find the answer.

I wish you the best of luck.

Dear Question Asker, It is understandable to experience hesitation and doubt when faced with the significant life event of marriage. A period of six years may seem relatively short, yet it is also not a brief span of time for an individual. After six years of navigating decisions together, individuals may feel a sense of trance, as if the past six years have passed with remarkable swiftness, leaving little time to reflect on the depth of their feelings.

The lack of detail in the text is compensated for by the revelation of a few important facts.

The intensity of your initial feelings for your boyfriend has diminished, yet you and he remain closely connected.

A concise summary of the six years spent cohabiting indicates that the couple in question should have enjoyed a harmonious relationship, free from significant disagreements or irreconcilable conflicts.

It can be reasonably assumed that both you and your boyfriend are caring and responsible individuals, given your decision to adopt several pets. This suggests that you possess highly agreeable personalities.

Individuals with a positive and benevolent disposition tend to exhibit greater emotional stability and a reduced proclivity for impulsive decision-making and emotional volatility. This quality may explain the longevity and stability of your relationship over the past six years. A harmonious relationship often fosters a less intense emotional state and a greater capacity for affection, which may contribute to the ease with which you interact and the depth of your connection.

The aforementioned information may appear ordinary and innocuous, yet it is precisely this "normal" and "not bad" quality that can cause confusion at the critical juncture of marriage. Individuals may find themselves uncertain about the most effective ways to assess their romantic feelings and determine whether their partner is genuinely worthy of lifelong trust.

If circumstances are progressing in a positive manner, it may be beneficial to introduce challenges to the relationship. It is important to avoid testing human nature in a deliberate manner, as this is not aligned with one's personality and is unnecessary. Instead, the significant event of an impending marriage can be utilized as an opportunity to assess the relationship, understanding, trust, and compatibility. Given the multifaceted considerations involved in marriage, it is a comprehensive process that allows for observation of each other, as well as each other's parents, family, and oneself, in various aspects.

For example, the character of both sides can be observed in the manner in which they conduct themselves at the first meeting of their parents. The manner in which discussions are conducted regarding the bride price, dowry, and wedding arrangements can also provide insight into the future dynamics of the family. The way in which discussions are conducted at this stage can serve as a model for the way in which discussions will be conducted by the couple, their in-laws, and other family members in the future. It is therefore important to consider matters such as the handling of property before and after marriage, as well as the care of children after pregnancy, before marriage.

It is possible that these matters may be perceived as mundane, tedious, and boring. However, it is important to recognise that, regardless of one's circumstances, the daily necessities and trivial matters will inevitably arise in a marital relationship. The discussions, planning, and arrangements conducted prior to marriage can serve as a demonstration of one's capacity to sustain a marriage over time. If the prospective spouse is a responsible individual who is capable of withstanding challenges, they will collaborate with the individual in question to arrange these matters in a satisfactory manner prior to marriage. Through this joint effort, it is also possible to gain insight into one's emotional response to significant events.

As previously stated, a relationship that has not been tested by the vicissitudes of life is inherently fragile, lacks the resilience to withstand careful consideration, and is susceptible to confusion. Therefore, it is prudent to initiate the various pre-marital plans and arrangements, conduct a thorough examination and observation of each other, and become fully aware of one's true intentions.

Should the preparation process reveal incompatibility, a careful consideration of the marriage is advised. Conversely, if the process uncovers positive attributes, a decision to proceed with the marriage is recommended.

I extend my sincerest wishes for your happiness.

From what the poster has shared, it seems that they have been trying out marriage for six years. They appear to be able to navigate through the minor challenges in life without getting too caught up in them. Instead, they are asking themselves a fundamental question: do I still love him? I would like to extend my heartfelt congratulations to the poster. It seems that their trial marriage has been a success.

From my own experience, I would like to suggest a few things that I believe are helpful for couples in a marriage.

1. The honeymoon period (the period of romantic passion)

In the name of love, the two people who have tied the knot are in the honeymoon period, reminiscent of the early stages of a relationship when they are in love and in each other's arms. This early stage of marriage is akin to the initial stages of a relationship, when the two people are still excited and happy, and the two people who are right for each other have finally come together to fulfill their dreams. This period lasts approximately 6-12 months, and in some cases it can last longer, 1-3 years, depending on the person. This is for reference only.

It is also the case that some couples remain in love with each other as they did in the early days of their relationship for the rest of their lives.

2. The period of adjustment after marriage (mid-term of the relationship)

When a marriage officially enters its second phase, it is natural to experience some discomfort as a result of differing living habits, temperature preferences, and dietary habits, among other things. At this stage, conflicts and debates may arise, and it is important to consider how to navigate them effectively. Disappointment and conflict can often be the main points of contention during this period.

How might one find a balance in this conflict? Perhaps it would be helpful to put oneself in the other person's shoes more, to respect each other, and to seek a compromise.

This is a crucial time in a marriage. It is during this period that the seven-year itch often arises.

3. The period of a stable marriage (the late stage of love)

When two people have had the opportunity to adjust to each other, have started a small family, worked hard towards a common goal, planned for the future, and expanded their careers, they may find themselves working together.

It would be beneficial to become partners and friends to each other. When there is a problem, it might be helpful to discuss it with each other and try to find a solution together.

Throughout the entire marriage process, love serves as the bond and responsibility as the bridge, working together to build a stable home.

I wonder how many six-year periods there might be in a lifetime. I believe that what suits you is the best.

It is my hope that I can help you find solutions to your problems by sharing my insights on what marriage is like.

I hope that you may find happiness and safety in your endeavors.

Good morning, my name is Jiayun.

You have indicated that, after a six-year cohabitation, you perceive a shift in your relationship, whereby you feel more like friends than a prospective marital partner.

Before making a decision, we can explore these questions.

1. The relationship between the two of you is more akin to that of friends than that of romantic partners.

Please describe the aspects that are similar to a friendship.

Please describe the aspects of the relationship that do not align with the traditional romantic partnership.

2. Please describe the type of marital relationship you desire.

3. You have expressed doubt as to whether you truly love him. How might you ascertain whether you truly love him?

4. It is often overlooked whether there is a harmonious physical connection.

While love and marriage each have their own characteristics, there is never just one model that applies to all cases.

Regardless of external opinions, it is essential to prioritize your own feelings. Identify your desired outcome, recognizing that perfection is unattainable. Select your primary objective and determine the best course of action to achieve it.

In conclusion, I wish you a state of clear happiness.

We have been together for six years, have always lived together, and have even adopted a few pets. There are times when I feel that our relationship is more akin to that of friends or roommates than that of a romantic partnership.

Recently, we have been considering the option of marriage, but I have begun to question whether I truly love him. I am uncertain about the best course of action. How should I conduct an introspective analysis?

From the comments, it is evident that the questioner is perplexed by the onset of doubt regarding her romantic feelings for her boyfriend, despite six years of affectionate attachment. The imminent prospect of matrimony has prompted her to seek guidance in understanding her emotional state.

It is my hope that the following information will provide you with a degree of support as you embark on an introspective journey, offering a multitude of perspectives and ideas with which to re-examine this relationship.

The initial step is to ascertain whether there are underlying concerns, such as a fear of marriage or a fear of having children.

The duration of six years of cohabitation represents a significant challenge in the context of contemporary relationships, which are often characterised by a hasty and superficial approach to intimacy. It is evident that you and your partner have established a certain degree of emotional intimacy, having lived together and raised a number of pets. Additionally, you have gained a profound understanding of each other's habits and have collectively nurtured the growth of several young lives.

These are all significant and profound connections.

The event that prompted your reconsideration of your relationship with your boyfriend was the discussion of marriage. It is evident that the prospect of marriage has a significant personal impact on you.

In the case of such trigger events, it would be advisable to first consider whether there may be a resistance or even rejection of the idea of "getting married" or even "having children."

If the answer is affirmative, then the question of whether it is your current boyfriend is irrelevant; you must understand and address this issue.

If the answer is negative, then it can be reasonably concluded that there is no necessary connection between the occurrence of this trigger event and the beginning of your vague doubts about whether you love your boyfriend. It is merely a coincidence. You may wish to consider whether there are any deeper influencing factors.

Secondly, it would be beneficial to undertake a review of the relationship with the boyfriend in question, in order to ascertain whether the factors that initially attracted the individual to him remain present, and to identify any changes that may have occurred.

The initial attraction associated with romantic love is believed to be caused by the secretion of hormones such as dopamine. Over time, however, the neurotransmitters serotonin and oxytocin, which are released in response to familiarity, are thought to replace dopamine, thereby creating a more peaceful yet long-lasting and stable feeling.

It is therefore pertinent to enquire whether the same feelings of attraction remain, or whether there are still aspects of the partner that attract the subject. Furthermore, it is important to ascertain whether the changes that have occurred are sufficient to maintain the initial feelings of attraction.

One may attempt to make some conditional changes, such as more extreme deformations or assumptions about his character, appearance, wealth, etc. The question then becomes whether one would still be willing to stay with this person and never leave.

Once these distorted conditions have been tested and confirmed individually within the subject's consciousness, the internal voice is likely to become more discernible in its assessment of the relationship.

3. It is recommended that couples engage in open and honest communication in order to ascertain whether their hearts are in sync.

Given that you have already reached the stage of discussing marriage, it can be inferred that you both aspire to grow old together, providing mutual support.

Subsequently, when one's internal monologue remains somewhat disorganized and uncertain, it may be beneficial to engage in a gentle dialogue with one's partner. During this conversation, it is advisable to express one's concerns and anxieties, and to observe the response of the other party.

Such responses may serve to dispel some of our doubts.

It is my hope that the aforementioned information will prove inspirational to you.

As a psychologist, my focus is not on the exploration of human nature, but rather on the examination of the human heart. I extend my best wishes to you.

Good day, question asker. My name is Evan.

From the author's account, it is evident that the author and her boyfriend have a positive relationship. However, concerns about the emotional aspects of their future marriage have caused the author to experience confusion and doubt. When faced with your boyfriend of six years, the author is uncertain about your future life. How can you effectively manage your negative emotions and ensure a successful future marriage?

In this case, a reassuring gesture such as a pat on the shoulder can provide the questioner with a sense of support. When communicating with your current boyfriend, you can calmly, sincerely, and clearly state your feelings and address topics that are important to you. As the question was originally posed on the platform, I will also offer the questioner some brief advice:

Demonstrate emotional availability for your partner.

Provide a clear indication of your interest and support for your boyfriend's decision. Maintain eye contact with your boyfriend and nod your head to demonstrate that you are actively listening and offering your support.

When he talks about something or asks a question, refrain from responding with vague or dismissive comments. Instead, demonstrate active listening by asking relevant questions, expressing support for his decision, or sharing personal experiences and seeking his input.

Demonstrating interest and support, or a bias towards your partner, is fundamental to a successful relationship.

If your boyfriend discusses emotionally charged topics, you can provide support and assistance regarding any challenging issues he raises. For instance, if he mentions a dispute with his supervisor, do not immediately dismiss him. Instead, ascertain the facts and offer guidance on the most appropriate course of action.

You might consider saying something like, "That's unfortunate. I'm sorry to hear you're facing this challenge."

"How can I be of assistance?"

Discuss your relationship or future plans.

It is recommended that the questioner initiate discussions with their boyfriend about the relationship, addressing any issues or concerns, as well as future aspirations and expectations. To facilitate this, it is advisable to inquire about the evolution of the relationship over time.

It would be beneficial to have some relationship discussions and future discussions. For example, you could ask your partner what made them first think that you should start dating. You could also inquire about the biggest change they've noticed in you since we started dating.

"What are my strengths and weaknesses as a girlfriend? How can I improve?"

"What are your expectations for the future? What are your plans for the future?"

"I have some thoughts about the future. Would you like me to share them with you?" "I feel like our life is too boring. Do you have any suggestions for improvement?"

Discuss your relationship with your boyfriend in a calm and objective manner.

In the event that the relationship between the questioner and her boyfriend is experiencing difficulties, it is advisable to maintain an objective and calm tone when discussing the relationship. Should you identify any issues that require attention, it is important to remain open-minded and avoid becoming emotionally involved.

It would be advisable to focus on the occasional passion that spices up your intimate relationship, rather than being complacent with the status quo.

If the questioner wishes to convey to their boyfriend that the engagement is a source of distress, they may choose to say, "I assure you that I am not being overly particular. My intention is to convey that I care about you and our relationship, and that I simply wish for our relationship to be optimal."

"If you wish to marry me, it is imperative that we have a satisfactory romantic relationship before I can even consider such a proposal."

It is essential to address emotional issues directly and honestly.

It may appear more convenient to allow issues to resolve themselves and avoid challenging subjects. However, avoiding these subjects will likely result in prolonged difficulties.

Instead, take the time to discuss the issue. The questioner can say, "I am aware that I am somewhat dissatisfied with the current state of our relationship and I am interested in making some changes."

"I would be grateful if we could find some time to discuss this further."

It is important to note that avoidance of these challenging topics will likely result in a gradual deterioration of the relationship. It is recommended to initiate a candid discussion about the issues at hand.

"I would like to discuss the engagement and hope you will be open to considering my perspective."

It is important to identify whether you are avoiding discussing your feelings. Try to think about the reasons for this and explain them to him.

Identify whether you are avoiding discussing your feelings. Consider the reasons for this and provide an explanation to him.

Inform him that you are aware of the pressure you have been facing regarding the engagement and that you have considered the reasons behind this. You believe that your reaction may be a defense mechanism.

I've always been the type to appreciate a certain degree of passion in my life from time to time. I feel pressure and confusion about the future. I hope that couples can be honest with each other and accommodate each other. I hope you can discuss this with me patiently.

Please be patient.

Should any issues arise, it is advisable to communicate in a patient and compassionate manner. The individual posing the question should endeavour to convey their thoughts to their partner in a clear and concise manner.

In the event of a conflict or problem, it is important to remain calm and strive to comprehend the other party's perspective. One could say, for instance, "I don't wish to place undue pressure on you."

I hope we can communicate about this in a patient and constructive manner, and I hope you can listen to me in a patient and constructive manner. I promise we can talk calmly and honestly about anything.

"

It is important to be transparent about your objectives and intentions.

When discussing emotionally challenging topics, it is important to address them directly. Regardless of whether the individual is seeking to enhance the relationship or resolve a problem, they should be transparent about their intentions.

As an example, you could say, "I would like to discuss the long-term prospects of our relationship. Do you have any plans for our future married life?"

How can we ensure consistency in our married life? Are you prepared to proceed with the marriage now?

Request a discussion about the future of the marriage. There have been occasions when it has felt as though your needs have been overlooked.

"Given the concerns I have about our future life together, I hope you can provide the reassurance and confidence I am seeking. I hope you can value my feelings."

As you embark on your journey into married life, it is essential to recognize that honest communication is a pivotal element in fostering a long-lasting marriage. Love, respect, and courtesy serve as the fundamental building blocks for a joyful and fulfilling marital relationship.

It is important to be honest with your loved one and to express your gratitude and understanding for each other.

I hope this information is helpful to you.