What's wrong with me for raising such an ungrateful child while my mother is sick and so fierce?

Hello, question asker!

From what you've told me, I feel sorry for you. You've given your son a lot, but haven't received care and respect in return, which makes you feel a bit uncomfortable. Is that right?

After reading your description, I have to say that you have a great ability to perceive things. When you encounter a problem, you think about how to solve it, rather than getting stuck in it and letting it build up. So I want to give you a thumbs-up for your ability to perceive and reflect.

Did you want to get something off your chest, or did you have a question?

No matter what, the questioner also has certain expectations. So, it'd be good for the questioner to think about what they want to get out of this. What can be done to achieve their expectations?

If expectations are met, how will you feel differently? Who will notice the difference?

From what I can tell from the questioner's description, I get the sense that the mother loves and cares for her child, but also expects a lot from them. Is that right?

Parents are usually the most selfless to their children (except for those from dysfunctional families), and will always give their children what they think is best. But we can think about it: is it when you give what you think is best, or when the child thinks it is best, that the child can truly accept and respect you?

What about how the questioner feels? It seems like your child not only didn't take care of you when you were sick, but also yelled at you. Is that right?

This shows that the questioner has certain expectations of the child, namely that they will care for them and obey them. What are the questioner's expectations?

Apart from this, how would you describe your child's attitude towards you?

I'd like to ask the question owner what they did after being rejected by their child. Did they tell their child how they felt when they were awake?

If, by some miracle, the child cares about you and takes good care of you, what do you think you did to make that happen?

I'd like to offer the questioner some tips on how to handle those uncomfortable feelings that come up when kids don't care, in the hope that they'll be helpful.

First, take a look at your language and attitude towards your child.

The questioner said that they usually don't scold their children, and it is indeed not easy to raise a child alone. So, what kind of language and attitude do you usually use to speak to and educate your children? Being aware of these things can help you figure out why your child has these emotions. Could it be because of over-indulgent parenting?

Or could there be other reasons?

It's important to do your own thing and respect your child's choices.

The questioner said that waking the child up was the cause of the issue. I'd like to suggest that they consider whether they had the habit of sleeping in when they were younger. Do they still do it now?

Everyone has emotions that others don't notice, and children are no exception. Adults think that they shouldn't sleep in, that they should eat breakfast, and that it's good for the children's health. This is true, but think about how we felt when we were children and faced our parents' urging.

I think the best thing for the questioner to do is to give it a try. If it doesn't work out, there's no harm done. Just do your own thing, respect your child's choice, and learn to let him take responsibility for his own choices.

It's important to communicate effectively, let go when you can, and learn to rely on your child.

I know it's tough for the OP to raise a child alone. She might be emotionally sensitive and need support. Your child is 14 now and is a young adult. You can talk to him after things have happened, tell him how sad you are about his unintentional actions, and then in life, try to let go and let your child make his own decisions and learn to rely on him. If you are strong, he will be weak; if you are weak, he will be strong.

This way, the child will get used to caring for you, and you'll be able to live a more carefree life. What do you think?

I just wanted to say that you've done a great job. The rest is about learning to respect your child, guide your child, tell your child your needs, help each other, and making life better and better.

I just wanted to say that I love you and the world loves you too.

Stay strong.

Good day.

It is evident that the adolescent son in question is fully aware of the emotional state of his mother. However, at a time when the mother requires the greatest degree of care and attention, the son exhibits a lack of concern for her feelings. Furthermore, he actively opposes her and even displays a hostile demeanor to express his discontent. This behavior causes the mother immense distress, leading her to question her role in raising a rebellious child despite her love for him.

It would appear that you are interested in learning what you might have done wrong.

It is important to note that the perception of rebellion may be a manifestation of underlying unresolved emotional issues. It is possible that the current behavior is a manifestation of the parent's own unmet needs for care and attention during a period of vulnerability.

If one does not request that one's son arise when one is indisposed, will he do so of his own volition, without protest? It is likely that the response will be similar to the current one: "Ten thousand unwilling, hates me for asking him to get up, I'd rather stay away from him, he looks very fierce!"

"This confrontation between you has been ongoing for some time, has it not?"

The underlying issue pertains to the manner in which you interact with your adolescent son. He is exhibiting rebellious behavior, and your directives are having the opposite effect, prompting him to act in opposition to your requests. Your efforts to influence his behavior have led to a deterioration in the quality of your relationship.

Is that indeed the case?

Let us begin by examining the psychological characteristics of adolescents.

1. A robust sense of autonomy emerges, manifesting as a reluctance to comply with authority figures, including parents, educators, and other adults, as well as a disinclination to adhere to established norms and conventions.

2. They have not yet fully extricated themselves from their dependence on their parents. They seek spiritual understanding, support, and protection from their parents (no longer emotional or life-related dependence).

Upon comprehension of these characteristics, one can then proceed to communicate with the child in an effective manner.

1. It is imperative to cultivate a respectful relationship with one's child, rather than merely issuing commands and imposing expectations.

2. It is essential to instill a sense of trust in one's child and to encourage them to assume the responsibilities that are appropriate to their age and capabilities.

3. It is essential to provide children with mental understanding and support. While basic necessities such as food and warmth are important, a sense of spiritual identity is also crucial.

4. It is imperative that parents regulate their emotions and refrain from allowing their children to be influenced by their negative moods.

The aforementioned information is provided for your reference and is intended to be a helpful resource.