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Because of self-negation due to appearance, is self-doubt falling deeper like an endless pit?

unattractiveness confidence plummet constant tension self-loathing inferiority complex
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Because of self-negation due to appearance, is self-doubt falling deeper like an endless pit? By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024

The root of the matter was simply that I thought I was unattractive. Ever since then, my confidence and ambition have plummeted. The carefree me has transformed into a constant state of tension and fear, repeatedly questioning whether my behavior aligns with the persona of someone who is ugly. In my narrow-minded psyche, if one is ugly, they should be cautious at all times and adopt a low profile, because their ugliness disqualifies them from showcasing themselves, and they should live in a vortex of self-loathing and inferiority, shrouded in the shadows and rotting. They cannot attract anyone, and their existence should be deeply disliked by everyone except their parents. Each morning, I wake up with these thoughts, transitioning from a state of relaxation to one of extreme tension and tightness, with a sinking feeling of self-loathing that seems to have no bottom. Initially, I felt unworthy of such ease, then unworthy of thinking, and eventually unworthy of living. This cycle continues, making each day feel like living death. I desperately want to find an escape, to reconcile with myself. However, I fear the judgmental glances of others, the fear of being called someone with inexplicable confidence. I hope to appear harmonious in the eyes of others. My narrow-mindedness has a firm grip on me, and I know it's wrong, yet it tortures me like an obsession.

Elizabeth Rose Parker Elizabeth Rose Parker A total of 7162 people have been helped

Good topic, author!

I totally get where you're coming from. I was in the same boat not so long ago and it was a real struggle. I spent a long time thinking about it and I realised that it wasn't about my appearance at all.

Could it be that my appearance anxiety is actually caused by low self-esteem?

After thinking about it for a long time, I finally figured something out. I realized that for me, it's my inferiority complex that causes appearance anxiety. At the time, I thought, "If I look better, will I really be confident?"

We all have things about ourselves that we're not so proud of. It could be our appearance, our knowledge, our qualifications, our height, our figure, our job, our family background, our educational experience, or anything else. When we feel inferior about any of these things, it can make us feel like we're living in the shadows.

If we recognize that inferiority is the root cause, then we just need to find out why inferiority arises. What do you really want from the bottom of your heart?

It's not easy to find this, but you've got this! Keep talking to yourself and exploring your true inner needs. For me, it's all about self-acceptance and embracing my flaws.

I know that I'll never be perfect, and that's okay! In the past, present, and future, I'll always have a series of shortcomings. But that's just who I am, and I'm learning to embrace it.

We all do it! We pin our hopes on the outside world, hoping to gain self-recognition and self-affirmation through external recognition. But that is just a drop in the bucket, and it is never possible to gain the approval of everyone. What really needs to be done is to make the self strong, and the strength of the self comes from self-affirmation.

As the saying goes, confident people are the best and the most beautiful. And we all know that feeling!

I love you, world! And I love you too, my dear friend!

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Bryan Gregory Allen Bryan Gregory Allen A total of 7672 people have been helped

You say you don't think you're pretty. You think that if you're ugly, you should be careful and keep a low profile at all times. Ugly people don't deserve to show themselves, and should live in confidence-and-mild-self-doubt-in-the-future-9475.html" target="_blank">inferiority and self-loathing, unable to attract anyone and deserving of the hatred of everyone except their parents.

Your irrational beliefs are making you feel increasingly inferior. You don't deserve to relax, think, or live. You're afraid of being criticized, of being seen as too confident, and of being seen as a bad person. These beliefs can't be eliminated, and they control you, causing you pain.

You're engaging in the greatest form of narcissism by attacking yourself like this. You fight against yourself every day, and you don't spare even a little bit of your attacking energy for others, do you?

It would be good for you to give a little bit to others.

You should talk to someone other than your parents to see if they agree you're really that ugly. I think you have your own unique advantages. Even if you are ugly, so what?

Does being ugly mean you don't deserve to live?

If you don't have one advantage, you still have others.

For instance, you've got strong work skills and are good at expressing yourself. From your lengthy text, I can tell that you have a very clear logical expression ability, which is your strength.

You can write about your ten strengths, identify your advantages, continuously improve yourself, love your work, and enhance your self-esteem through practical experience.

I'm curious, if you're very confident and ambitious, what will happen? By attacking yourself like this and making yourself suffer, are you avoiding having to face your imagined success?

If you're struggling to deal with it on your own, you can also find a counselor to help you. Together, you can explore the reasons why you're so obsessed with causing yourself pain.

Best of luck!

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Xavier Woods Xavier Woods A total of 1897 people have been helped

Hello. I am Fei Yun, the Heart Detective Coach. I will accompany you with warmth and listen to your story with sincerity.

I can sense your inferiority complex, your self-doubt, your negative self-assessment, and the strong sense of loneliness caused by your appearance.

Your writing also reveals a valuable strength: your perceptiveness and ability to portray your true feelings with particular accuracy and delicacy. These qualities are what make you so sensitive and talented as a writer.

Read the book High Sensitivity is a Gift. It's the perfect place to start. You have a talent that you haven't even discovered yet. Go ahead and explore your potential.

Next, we will examine what is troubling you.

Living in an "ivory tower" requires an understanding of human nature. People with high emotional intelligence often have good interpersonal relationships. You don't have to be good at everything and get along with everyone. Having good interpersonal relationships and a good mood will enable you to better devote yourself to your studies and lives.

?1. Your judgment of yourself is a perseverance that lacks correct self-awareness.

Your judgment of yourself is a lack of correct self-knowledge.

We are used to evaluating a person or thing using our own values and standards. Having values means having judgments, and judgments are a person's beliefs.

We are used to evaluating a person or thing using our own values and standards. Having values means having judgments, and judgments are a person's beliefs.

Judgment is good. It can give us direction. But when judgment becomes fixed, each fixation has a "limited belief." Fixation = hardened obsession, caused by limited perception.

Judgment is good. It can give us direction. But judgment solidifies. Every fixation has a "limited belief." Fixation = hardened obsession. It's caused by limited cognition.

In the Tang Dynasty, being fat was considered beautiful, and Yang Guifei was so plump that she became the fat beauty of that era. Different eras have different interpretations of beauty.

Westerners judge Eastern beauty as Gong Li's kind of healthy beauty. This proves there is no unique standard for appearance, nor is there a fixed standard.

You must please yourself before you can please others. Accept yourself.

This judgment you have made about your own ugly appearance is an obsession that will make your life lack fluidity. It will distort relationships and even destroy them.

If you are fixed, the world will remain at the stage of your perception. You will lack the height of perception and lose your curiosity.

A fixed person loses the fluidity of life and becomes rigid, hindering communication in relationships. Once fixed, they cannot listen and label the other person. To listen, you must let go of your fixation.

Boost your self-confidence by changing one belief: "My appearance is not my strength. My strength is high sensitivity, good perception, initiative, and enterprising." Find many more things to appreciate about yourself.

You need to stop worrying about what other people think and start focusing on your own self-confidence.

?

2. You will feel that sense of loneliness with your heart.

? 2. Feel that sense of loneliness with your heart.

Let me be clear:

Low self-esteem is a self-evaluation that is cognitively biased and emotionally perceived as incompetence and weakness. This is a false belief that must be corrected. There is no difference in ability between people with low self-esteem and those with high self-esteem.

Low self-esteem causes loneliness. Loneliness is a subjective feeling of isolation or alienation from others or from the outside world.

Let me be clear:

It is self-withdrawal, severing of connections, a form of escape, the painful feeling of isolation from others, and a passive form of isolation.

You are not alone.

Alone: a person feels connected to the world and is open to experiencing everything it has to offer.

The reason for loneliness is simple: he cannot connect with himself. He can only give himself a positive evaluation (especially a good one) when he is connected with himself.

Loneliness is the result of being unable to connect with oneself. To give oneself a good evaluation, especially a good one, one must first connect with oneself.

Connecting with others is a key factor in distinguishing loneliness from solitude.

Connecting with others is the key to distinguishing loneliness from solitude.

If you give yourself a bad review, your relationships will undoubtedly suffer. You'll cut off the connection and break the relationship. You'll make negative comments about yourself, such as being boring, uninteresting, looked down upon, flawed, and unable to keep up with others.

If you give yourself a bad review, your interpersonal relationships will undoubtedly suffer. You'll be unable to enjoy the simple pleasure of getting along with other people. You'll cut off the connection and break the relationship. You'll make negative comments about yourself, such as "I'm boring," "I'm uninteresting," "I'm flawed," and "I can't keep up with others."

A person with high self-worth gives positive feedback to themselves, likes themselves, enjoys a good connection with themselves, likes other people, is respected in crowds, and is liked. They also give positive feedback to others, enjoy connections with people, and are open.

Loneliness: Those with low self-worth cannot get along well with themselves or give themselves positive feedback. They need to "affirm themselves in everything," avoid some rules, and dislike themselves, others, and are unwilling to be constrained.

They simply cannot bear the loneliness of being alone when they escape from people.

Read my article "It turns out that the root cause of psychological problems is this: self-worth." It's the best way to improve your self-worth. Just follow me on Weibo to read it.

A person's self-confidence is directly related to their sense of self-worth. Self-worth is a subjective evaluation of oneself. A child who is often affirmed, praised, and recognized by their parents will have a high sense of worth and be very confident.

Children who are often criticized and rejected by their parents are easily sensitive and suspicious, and develop a sense of inferiority.

The simplest and most effective way to boost your sense of self-worth is to give yourself positive feedback, affirm, praise, and approve of yourself, and accept yourself. A child's self-confidence requires 8,000 affirmations, praises, and approvals from their parents.

Adler was a renowned psychologist who struggled with low self-esteem as a child but went on to achieve great things. He believed that everyone experiences this, and I highly recommend reading his book, "Low Self-Esteem and Transcendence," to gain insights on how to overcome it.

I am confident that the above will be helpful to you, and I love you.

I am confident that the above will be helpful to you. The world and I love you.

Click "Find a coach" in the upper right corner or at the bottom to continue communicating and grow with me one-on-one.

If you want to continue communicating, click "Find a coach" in the upper right corner or at the bottom. I will communicate and grow with you one-on-one.

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Leonardo Leonardo A total of 5731 people have been helped

Good day, landlord. It is my hope that the following answer will prove to be of some assistance to you.

From my perspective, you appear to be experiencing a multitude of internal conflicts and difficulties, accompanied by a pronounced sense of self-doubt and self-negation. Do you recognize these sentiments? It is important to understand that the path to personal growth and improvement does not entail constant self-denial and self-criticism. Instead, it necessitates a process of understanding and acceptance, which provides the foundation for the courage and resilience required to make meaningful changes. Furthermore, when we strive for harmony in the eyes of others, it is essential to prioritize inner harmony first. When we achieve internal harmony, it naturally manifests in our external interactions.

The following recommendations are offered for your consideration:

It is recommended that you practice self-acceptance.

I have authored an article on the topic of self-acceptance, which I believe you may find of interest. It contains information that may prove useful to you.

Self-acceptance is the foundation of self-confidence and self-change. A lack of self-worth and feelings of shame caused by a lack of self-acceptance are at the core of many anxieties, depressions, obsessive-compulsive disorders, personality disorders, and numerous other negative experiences.

Self-acceptance serves as the foundation for self-confidence and self-change. A lack of self-worth and feelings of shame caused by a lack of self-acceptance are at the heart of many anxieties, depressions, obsessive-compulsive disorders, personality disorders, and many other negative experiences.

Self-acceptance can be defined as an individual's positive attitude towards oneself and one's own characteristics. This entails the capacity to accept one's current situation with joy, without feeling pride in one's own merits or inferiority due to perceived shortcomings. Furthermore, self-acceptance can be considered a fundamental human right.

An individual is not required to possess exceptional qualities, attain remarkable accomplishments, or undergo alterations in accordance with the expectations of others in order to be accepted.

In the view of psychologist Maslow, a healthy individual should be capable of accepting themselves and human nature without experiencing distress or discontent. This is analogous to the way in which one does not complain about the fundamental characteristics of water or rocks. It is possible to lead a fulfilling life despite one's shortcomings and flaws.

The act of accepting oneself entails a comprehensive understanding of one's position in life, including an awareness of one's needs, desires, and limitations.

The act of accepting oneself entails a comprehensive understanding of one's position in life, an awareness of one's needs and desires, and a clear perception of one's capabilities and limitations.

The act of accepting oneself entails maintaining composure and patience in the face of one's perceived shortcomings. This entails a belief in the capacity to continue improving and growing in reality.

The act of accepting oneself entails the ability to remain calm and patient in the face of one's own imperfections, with the conviction that one can continue to improve and grow in reality.

The act of accepting oneself entails a valuation and cherishing of one's inherent qualities, a respect for oneself and for others, an objective perception of the differences between oneself and others, an understanding that one's life is a singular phenomenon, and an ability to comprehend and approve of oneself in the absence of external validation.

The act of accepting oneself entails a valuation and cherishing of one's inherent qualities, a respect for oneself and for others, an objective perception of the differences between oneself and others, an understanding that one's life is a unique phenomenon, and an ability to understand and approve of oneself even in the absence of external validation.

The act of accepting oneself entails recognizing that when an error is made, it is a singular action or occurrence, rather than an indication of inherent defect. It is not a reflection of one's overall character. One must be willing to acknowledge mistakes and accept that they are an inherent aspect of life. Mistakes serve as a conduit for growth and learning.

The act of accepting oneself entails recognizing that when an error is committed, it is a singular action or occurrence, rather than an indication of inherent deficiency. One must be willing to acknowledge mistakes and recognize that they are an inherent aspect of life. Errors serve as a conduit for personal growth and development.

The act of accepting oneself entails the acceptance of all genuine phenomena in life. This implies a stance of impartiality and non-prejudice, neither subjectively biased nor bigoted, neither arrogantly self-assured nor humble.

As Romain Rolland famously observed, there is only one kind of heroism in the world: to love life after having understood the truth of life.

Consequently, it is also necessary to love oneself after having gained a clear understanding of oneself.

The difficulty in accepting oneself can be attributed to one's personal growth experience. During this period, individuals often receive criticism and negation from others, which can lead to the formation of a self-critical pattern. When confronted with perceived shortcomings or challenges, this internal voice may emerge, expressing self-doubt and criticism.

The difficulty in accepting oneself is related to one's growth experience. During this period, individuals often receive criticism and negation rather than unconditional acceptance. Consequently, this pattern gradually forms within the individual, leading to the emergence of a self-critical voice when faced with perceived shortcomings.

Consequently, self-acceptance necessitates practice. It required a considerable length of time for me to achieve incremental improvement in my level of self-acceptance, and I still find it challenging to fully accept myself. However, based on my personal experience, the more we accept ourselves, the more confident we become, the more motivated we are to change, and our state of mind continues to improve.

Consequently, self-acceptance should be conceptualized as a skill that is continuously developed and refined on a daily basis, rather than as an innate trait that is simply present.

The following five strategies have been identified by a clinical psychologist as effective methods for cultivating self-acceptance:

1. Establish the objective of self-acceptance as a personal goal.

"Self-acceptance begins with intention," states psychologist Jeffrey Zimbardo. It is crucial to establish a goal aimed at transforming a world characterized by blame, doubt, and shame into one that fosters inclusion, acceptance, and trust. This notion recognizes that self-loathing is an ineffective pathway to a fulfilling life.

"Self-acceptance begins with intention," states psychologist Jeffrey Zimbardo. It is crucial to establish a goal for oneself, aiming to transform a world characterized by blame, doubt, and shame into one that is inclusive, accepting, and trusting. This notion recognizes that self-loathing is an ineffective approach to achieving a fulfilling life.

Sambur posits that establishing a goal of self-acceptance in place of self-hatred will initiate a process of adaptation within the individual, leading to a more peaceful existence.

2. Record your strengths.

It is recommended that one record one's strengths on a daily basis in order to affirm one's own value. By doing so, one can gain insight into one's advantages. Furthermore, by leveraging one's strengths, one can achieve a greater sense of confidence than by attempting to correct one's weaknesses.

In the contemporary social context, deficiencies can be compensated for through collaboration, and an individual's strengths will reflect their distinctive value.

3. It is recommended that the individual seek support from interpersonal relationships.

It is beneficial to spend time with individuals with whom one feels comfortable, who will provide unconditional acceptance, support, and love. This allows for the establishment of a supportive interpersonal relationship, which in turn contributes to a more stable, peaceful, and joyful heart.

It is recommended that the reader engage in the following activity:

4. Engage in intrapersonal communication with one's optimal self-image.

Envision interacting with your optimal self. Envision that your optimal self, which resides within you, has emerged from your body and is observing your present circumstances. What counsel would your optimal self offer you in this situation?

This visual detachment allows for the separation of the current self, or the self experiencing suffering, from the individual's inner wisdom, or the self that is capable of facilitating healing.

This visual separation allows for the detachment of the current self, or the self experiencing suffering, from the situation at hand. This enables the utilization of one's inner wisdom, or the best self, to facilitate healing and growth.

This exercise is designed to facilitate the development of optimal parenting skills and self-compassion. It can be performed as a brief meditation practice during periods of distress or when seeking guidance or self-soothing.

This exercise is designed to facilitate the development of optimal parenting skills and foster self-compassion and self-love. It can be integrated into one's daily practice as a means of providing guidance and self-comfort when needed.

5. Model the characteristics of the individual you aspire to emulate until such a point is reached where you become that person.

If an individual lacks self-worth, it is imperative that they instill a sense of value within themselves. Only when we can unconditionally approve of ourselves can we finally forgive our mistakes and cease the pursuit of external validation.

It is indisputable that errors are made by all, and that the defining characteristic of an individual is not the occurrence of such errors.

Furthermore, it is important to reiterate that when an individual lacks something within themselves, they will seek it externally. If they are unable to accept themselves, they will develop a particular desire for acceptance from others. However, it is crucial to recognise that everything in the external world is inherently unstable. Consequently, the only way to achieve stable acceptance is to seek it inwardly. Once an individual has attained self-acceptance, they will no longer be concerned with the approval and evaluation of others, and they will gain true inner freedom.

2. Modify one's cognitive processes and cultivate a constructive self-concept.

The Pygmalion effect teaches us that outcomes are a function of expectations. In other words, one gets what one expects, not what one wants, but what one expects.

If expectations are formulated with confidence and a conviction that things will go smoothly, then they will indeed proceed smoothly. Conversely, if expectations are formulated with the belief that obstacles will arise, then obstacles will indeed arise.

It is therefore important to consider the role of positive beliefs in this process. When individuals possess positive beliefs and attitudes, when they are in a state of confidence, and when they believe that good things will happen, and consistently maintain this positive expectation, it is of significant importance.

The assumption that positive beliefs lead to positive actions, and that positive actions often lead to positive results, is a logical one.

The self-expectations that individuals hold are reflected in their level of effort and commitment. Those who believe they are capable of becoming a certain person or achieving a specific goal will invest the necessary effort to make that happen. Conversely, those who believe they are inadequate or incapable will remain stagnant and fail to improve.

Individuals tend to expect themselves to become the person they aspire to be and are motivated to work towards that goal. However, if they consistently perceive themselves as inadequate and believe they are unable to achieve their desired outcome, they may remain stagnant and fail to make progress.

Therefore, it is imperative to consistently affirm that, despite one's perceived lack of physical beauty, one unconditionally accepts and loves oneself. It is possible to attain one's desired outcomes through one's own efforts and to persistently advance and develop oneself, thereby approximating the person one aspires to become.

3. Cultivate self-confidence and a sense of security.

It is important to note that attempting to alter one's physical appearance is a challenging endeavor. Fixating on this pursuit can lead to persistent distress. However, it is possible to modify one's self-perception, attitude toward life, and inner feelings. When individuals cultivate confidence and satisfaction with themselves, they begin to radiate their own distinctive beauty and charm. It is essential to recognize the intrinsic value of one's existence and the singularity of one's identity in this world. This uniqueness deserves affirmation and recognition.

Confidence is derived from strength and hard work. When an individual becomes the person they aspire to be through their own efforts, they will become increasingly confident and feel more secure.

One may set appropriate goals and then achieve them in a step-by-step manner. By repeatedly achieving these goals, one's abilities will gradually improve, one's knowledge will accumulate, and one's experience will become richer. One will feel increasingly secure, have a greater sense of control over one's life, and naturally become more confident.

The aforementioned "appropriate" goals are those of medium difficulty, which can be reached by standing on tiptoes. If the goal is too small, it will fail to challenge the individual, resulting in boredom and a lack of motivation to complete it. Conversely, if the goal is too large, it will present an excessive amount of resistance, leading to a lack of confidence in the individual's ability to achieve it. Medium-intensity goals, therefore, are the optimal choice for stimulating motivation. When individuals work hard to achieve these goals, they will experience a sense of accomplishment and self-confidence.

For example, if an individual's current walking level is 4,000 steps per day, it would be more beneficial to set a daily goal of 4,500–5,000 steps rather than a goal below 4,000 or above 10,000.

When establishing goals that align with one's abilities, perseverance is of paramount importance. Only through action can one overcome adversity and truly ascertain one's intrinsic value.

It is recommended that you continue to encourage yourself, provide yourself with positive mental suggestions, and maintain the belief that you are capable of achieving your goals.

I wish you the utmost success.

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Amelia Brooke Carter Amelia Brooke Carter A total of 9458 people have been helped

Hello!

Host:

Hi, I'm Zeng Chen, a heart coach on this platform. I've read your post and I can really feel the conflict and struggle you're going through.

I also want to say that I admire you for facing your own heart and seeking help on the platform. It takes courage to do that, and I'm sure it will help you understand yourself better and adjust your thinking.

I'd also like to share some thoughts and observations that I hope will help you to see yourself in a different way.

1. It would be really helpful for you to go and see what your friends say about your appearance, and what others say about you too.

From reading your post, I can see that you feel ugly. I wonder if I can apply this to my own experience? I didn't realise this was a problem for me for quite some time.

I'm wondering if something that happened might be making you feel this way. Have you ever thought that maybe it's just our own perception?

In my experience answering questions, there are many people who others think are quite good-looking, but they themselves don't think they are good-looking. I'd really love to know how the poster defines "ugly."

I think it would be really helpful for us to look at what others say about our appearance. Let's go and see what our parents say about our appearance, what our friends say about our appearance, and what society says about beauty and ugliness.

This can really help us to understand and recognize ourselves more objectively, and to look at our appearance in a new way.

2. Give yourself a break and try to adjust your unreasonable perception.

From the post, I can see that the poster was having some pretty negative thoughts. It's so sad when we feel like we're not worthy of showing ourselves to the world. It's like we're stuck in this whirlpool of inferiority and self-loathing, living in the shadows and rotting away.

It's so sad when someone feels like they can't attract anyone. It's like they feel unworthy of thinking and eventually, of living.

I'd really love to know where you get these ideas from!

Could it be that there are people around you who are "ugly" and are treated like this by others? Or is it because the people around you all hate people who are "ugly"?

Or do you think that only "perfect" people can be confident and show themselves?

Let's change perspective and look at those who are ugly. Is Jack Ma handsome? Oh, but he is talented, isn't he?

Oh, is Huang Bo handsome? Well, he can attract Taiwanese goddess Lin Chi-ling!

He can show off his amazing music on stage and his incredible talent on TV. He has so many fans who love him!

I'm sure you'll agree that when it comes to you, the landlord, you don't deserve to show yourself. So let's try to realize that our absolute thinking is unreasonable.

So, let's try to replace these thoughts with some more reasonable ones.

3. Give yourself a big hug and accept yourself, just as you are!

From the post, I can see that the poster really wants to reconcile with himself. I can relate! I'm also afraid of other people's comments, and I'm afraid that other people will say that I have inexplicable confidence in myself.

So, host, have you ever thought that we behave this way because we are constantly criticizing ourselves and do not accept ourselves? It's so important to remember that how we treat ourselves is how others will treat us!

It's so true that how others treat us is a reflection of ourselves.

If we don't approve of ourselves, it's hard for others to do so too. And if we don't respect ourselves, it's also difficult for others to respect us.

So, if we want to gain the approval and acceptance of others, it's really important that we first accept and approve of ourselves. The reason we're so miserable is because we don't accept our real selves.

We all want to be our best selves, right? But sometimes, when we're trying so hard to be the ideal version of ourselves, it can be easy to forget about the real, imperfect version.

If we don't like ourselves, we'll end up hating ourselves. And if we hate ourselves, we'll have no energy left to grow and improve. We need to remember that we're all limited by our energy. If we use too much of it on negative thoughts, we won't have any left to use on positive things.

But on the contrary, our gentle care for ourselves will give us the strength to go further. We accept the real us, accept the parts of ourselves that we cannot change, and focus on the parts that we can change. Then, we will become better and better, and more and more confident!

Of course, self-acceptance isn't something you can just answer a question and be done with. It's something you have to work on constantly, and that's okay! You should also give yourself time and space to learn and improve.

I really hope these are helpful and inspiring for you! If you'd like to chat some more, you can click on Find a Coach to talk and grow together.

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Sofia Isabella Price Sofia Isabella Price A total of 625 people have been helped

Good day, inquirer.

It is imperative to identify strategies that can facilitate the alleviation of distress associated with obsessive thinking, particularly when it leads to self-denial due to perceived deficiencies in one's appearance. This is a crucial aspect that requires collective attention and exploration.

The phenomenon originated from my perception of myself as lacking physical attractiveness. This has subsequently led to a notable decline in my self-assurance and ambition.

The formerly carefree individual has become increasingly nervous and fearful. A constant review and self-evaluation is undertaken to ascertain whether one is behaving in a manner that aligns with the stereotype of an ugly person. At what point did the individual begin to pay attention to their appearance, and on what criteria is the "beauty" and "ugliness" of one's appearance defined?

One may attempt to rebel against one's own beliefs and refrain from accepting them. This is because such beliefs can significantly impede one's behavior and engender considerable confusion in one's life.

The inability to live carefree is a consequence of a shift in focus.

Our appearance is a fixed characteristic, regardless of whether we focus on it or not. The confusion we experience is a result of the association between appearance and other, more complex factors.

To illustrate,

Individuals who are physically attractive tend to receive a more favorable initial impression and are more readily accepted by others. This phenomenon is known as the "halo effect," which suggests that individuals who are physically attractive are also perceived as being more attractive in other ways, leading to a range of subsequent outcomes.

Individuals who are physically attractive tend to experience greater success in romantic and other interpersonal relationships.

These phenomena are not mere transient occurrences; rather, they exert a discernible influence on one's life. However, their impact is not enduring.

The long-term effect is contingent upon an individual's character and abilities. In other words, it is only when an individual is loved, has positive interpersonal relationships, and is capable at work that they can achieve a state of happiness and contentment.

It is not uncommon for individuals who are not particularly attractive to compensate for their physical shortcomings by leveraging their acquired knowledge and upbringing.

The questioner may be aware of these principles but still unable to distinguish between appearance and the value attached to it. This is because our way of thinking is dichotomous, and we generalize from a partial view. That is, if one does not meet a particular standard of physical attractiveness, they are deemed to be of no value.

One can attempt to consider the positive attributes of one's character apart from one's physical appearance. For instance, one might reflect on the value of a healthy body, a welcoming demeanor towards others, a sharp memory, gratitude towards one's parents, and so on. By focusing on these positive traits, one can foster a sense of contentment and joy in one's life.

"However, I am concerned about the potential reactions of others, particularly the possibility that they may perceive me as having an unusual degree of self-assurance. I aspire to be perceived as harmonious and well-adjusted by those around me.

When there is an excessive focus on how one is perceived by others, there is a tendency to project one's own internal judgments onto the words and actions of others. This can be conceptualized as a form of self-directed finger-pointing.

When individuals adopt a perfectionist mindset and accept themselves, they are more likely to refrain from self-criticism. When individuals adopt a more lenient approach towards themselves, they are more likely to be open to the words and actions of others, or even to engage in self-reflection and humor.

The lyrics, "I'm ugly, but I'm gentle," represent a voice of self-compassion and the discovery of one's inherent worth.

It is my sincere hope that this information is of some assistance to you. Sincerely,

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Ryan Ryan A total of 5065 people have been helped

Everyone has their own amazing persona and appearance! It's so important to remember that your appearance doesn't define you. You can be kind and do good deeds even if you don't look good on the outside. This will make you happy with those around you!

You have also seen your own narrow-mindedness, and you have made yourself lower your profile, which is to say, you have allowed yourself to continue on the path of inferiority and self-loathing. What has this brought you? It seems to have brought you only more pain and unwillingness, and it seems that you are still accepting this torture. But guess what? You can change all that!

♠Because of looks, I don't like myself.

♠ Confident and ambitious, but also nervous and afraid

♠Repeatedly review whether you are behaving like an ugly person.

Looks

Personality

If you have already been surrounded by some negative ideas, then it is absolutely the best thing you can do to allow yourself to make appropriate adjustments so that you can find a path that suits you and truly break through the shadows of your appearance!

⏯️⏯️⏯️⏯️ Reconcile with yourself, accept your appearance, and rebuild confidence!

☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂☂ And there's more! You can also enhance your appearance through postnatal beauty and makeup.

☂︎☂︎☂︎☂︎☂︎ The great news is that mental depression and inferiority complexes can be overcome with the help of psychological counseling!

You feel that you are hated by the outside world, but in the final analysis, it is possible that you yourself hate yourself, do not accept your appearance, and even less accept this complex and negative state of mind. This is why you make yourself so miserable! But there is hope!

Then put these feelings into the external level, so that you don't have too many positive thoughts. Your heart is full of tension, and you even feel that you don't deserve to be happy. This is also the words of the appearance association. But don't worry! You can change all of this.

You even feel that you are not worthy of thinking, so how can such thoughts bring you a good life? Think about it! You must think carefully about your current performance and some of your own thoughts. These are all worth focusing on.

I highly recommend that you seek psychological counseling and engage in long-term psychological counseling with a suitable counselor. You'll be amazed at how much better you feel when you stop caring so much about what other people think!

You deserve to be happy! It's time to stop letting your thoughts torture you. You have the power to make positive changes in your life. There's room for improvement in your appearance, but the biggest room for improvement lies in your thoughts. It's time to reflect on the pain and re-evaluate your inner self. You can do this!

ZQ?

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Comments

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Alexandra Thomas Honesty is a shield against the arrows of deceit.

I can totally relate to feeling down on myself over how I look. It's heartbreaking how a single thought can take over and make us doubt everything about ourselves. We all have our insecurities, but it's important to remember that beauty is so much more than what meets the eye. Everyone has their own unique charm that deserves to shine.

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Katia Weller A teacher's love for students is a warm embrace that makes learning a pleasant experience.

It's really tough when you feel like you're not good enough, especially when those thoughts start affecting your daily life. But you're not alone in this. Many people struggle with selfimage, and it's okay to seek help. Maybe talking to someone who understands or a professional could provide some comfort and guidance. You deserve to feel good about yourself, no matter what anyone else thinks.

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Melvin Davis Life is a race against time, make every second count.

Your feelings are valid, and it's clear that this has been weighing heavily on you for a while. The first step to healing is acknowledging that these thoughts aren't serving you. Try to focus on the things you love about yourself, no matter how small they may seem. Building up from there can lead to a more positive outlook on life. Remember, you're worthy of love and respect, just as you are.

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Aurora Lancaster Life is a symphony of nature and nurture.

I'm sorry you've been going through this. It sounds incredibly painful. Sometimes we need to remind ourselves that we're more than just our appearance. Our value comes from within, from the person we are inside. Take it one day at a time, and be gentle with yourself. You might find that the more you accept yourself, the easier it gets to let go of those negative thoughts.

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Roland Anderson The greatest compliment that was ever paid me was when someone asked me what I thought, and attended to my answer.

It's hard to break free from such deepseated beliefs, but it's not impossible. Surround yourself with positivity and people who uplift you. Consider practicing selfcompassion; it can be a powerful tool in changing how you view yourself. Little by little, you can challenge those limiting beliefs and start to see yourself in a new light. You don't have to do this alone; reaching out for support is a brave and important step.

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