Why do I tend to buy so much, and suffer from compulsive buying disorder... What causes this?

Hello,

Let's share a warm hug.

Your confusion: "I have to buy everything at once, and I can't even get a pen. If you study accounting, you can buy 200 books."

Anyway, whenever I wanted to learn something, I would buy a whole bunch of stuff first, and then I would buy everything. Once I had everything I needed, I couldn't learn anymore.

I used to think that buying things was the key to happiness. That was only when I was interested in something.

Once I'd finished stocking up, I lost interest after a while. I'm the same way when buying online courses: I fill up my online storage with them, buy whatever I see, and get anxious if I don't buy anything.

I felt like something was missing, so I wanted to buy it. What's wrong with me?

I grew up with this habit, and I had to buy all the dolls. If I saw that there was one I hadn't bought in the store, I just couldn't bear it and wanted to buy it at home.

If I didn't buy all the ones at home, I'd miss the one in the display case. That was the case when I was a kid.

When I was younger, I always had to buy all the books I wanted. I was fine, but I would always go and have a look in that cabinet. I would tap it with my little hand to make sure it was still in place.

"What's the reason for this in me?"

Hello, I read your story and it seems like you like to buy everything in full. If you don't buy it in full, you feel uncomfortable. Then you don't really like this state of mind, but you can't help it. I'd like to know what the reason is.

If I think that the psychological explanation is nothing more than a possibility from a genetic perspective, if your parents are this kind of serious about everything and you just like to buy everything, it is also possible that it is due to the way you were brought up. It is also possible that it is due to the influence of the environment. Well, when I ask the reason in reverse, is it really that important? Anyway, I am also like this now, so I might as well accept myself.

Isn't it a bad idea to buy everything? When you buy a complete set of books, it makes the set more valuable. The same goes for figurines. I don't think this is a bad thing. When you buy lots of reference books, you can find the answer to your question. When I'm researching a topic, I buy all the relevant books. Each book gives me a different perspective, so I can learn from each other and improve. It's worth trying a different way of thinking. You should accept your own characteristics. What's lacking is an eye for discovery.

The second method is to think in reverse. I heard a story about a clerk who used to write very beautifully, but at some point he felt that his writing was not perfect enough. So every time he tried to write perfectly, his handwriting got worse and worse. If he changed his goal from writing perfectly to writing as badly as possible, how could he write the worst handwriting? Then when he wrote the worst handwriting, his obsession got much better.

I think this could be useful for you. When I try to buy all the books, even if I can't get them all, I feel bad. We tell ourselves that we should only buy one copy of this set of books at a time, and if there's one more, we won't buy it. It's like reversing my goal. Let's see if it helps and if there are gains after a while.

All right, the world and I love you.

Hello, I'm Gu Daoxifeng, a heart exploration coach.

Socrates asked his disciples to pick the biggest ear of wheat in a field. They looked at one ear, then another, then shook their heads.

The disciples tried to pick a few ears of wheat, but they were not satisfied and threw them away. They thought there was still more to come.

Socrates reminded them they were still empty-handed.

We always miss what we don't have. We remember unfinished work more than completed work. When we focus on something, we want to complete it quickly.

When this is interrupted, we feel anxious and uncomfortable. Many people are in this state.

The family that lets the question owner move the dolls and buy books when he wants can let him have both. I believe the question owner was pampered as a baby and didn't need to make choices.

The questioner should be aware of:

Why do you want to buy all the books before reading them? Are you worried you'll miss something?

You don't want to read them all at once because there are too many books and you don't know where to start.

Does the questioner want the complete set of dolls because she likes them all, or because of the atmosphere?

Is the questioner unhappy because their needs aren't being met?

The questioner had a wealthy childhood, but was she secure? Did her parents love and support her?

Knowing why you do things can help you change.

What state of mind causes you to hoard? Is it a lack of security? Is it an unfinished plot?

Is it better to not get what you want? When you can identify your emotions, you can make changes.

Most of us think that the more, the better, but demand follows the principle of less is more. When our energy is too scattered, it may be difficult to achieve depth. Tyler Cowen, author of "The Economics of Life," often only reads 1 out of 10 books from beginning to end. However, he has achieved remarkable results, which may provide a good role model for us to focus.

Don't make decisions when you're emotional. When you really want to buy something, distract yourself. Wait until you calm down and then decide.

Keep an emotional diary of why you don't buy things. This helps you understand your motives.

Ask yourself why you want to buy something. Following the "useful principle" can help us make better decisions and avoid unnecessary purchases.

The next time you go shopping, think about what you bought last time and try to calm down.

The questioner might not have to worry about how much they bought. They could ask how much of it is useful to them. It might be worthwhile to satisfy even a little of their needs. Would this make them feel less troubled?

Read "The Nature of Self" and "Behavior" to understand your thoughts better.

Best wishes!

Hello, dear question asker!

From what you've told me, I can see that you're feeling a bit confused and helpless. But you're also doing a great job of recognising and facing up to this uncomfortable emotion. Well done!

You describe yourself so well! When studying, you buy all the books.

Even the learning network disk is full, but I haven't studied myself. Plus, I've got some experiences from when I was a child that I'd like to share with you. You have to buy new dolls. You feel uncomfortable if you don't buy them all. Sometimes you arrange them all together, which causes you to feel very confused now. You feel a bit forced and a bit at a loss. Is that right?

I really believe that all problems have a certain root cause. I'm sure you will too!

Oh, this is totally possible! It could be a kind of energy from when you were a child, or an education that your parents gave you.

Of course, there are also people who are naturally neat. It's so important to take care of yourself!

I'd love to know which one you are! There is an answer for each type, but we are just distracted by some things in the outside world.

I really hope these tips can help you, based on your description and my feelings.

First of all, don't be too hard on yourself. It's possible that we do have some obsessive behaviors, but they're not necessarily OCD. With OCD, we're often told what we must do.

From what you've told me, it seems like you might be struggling with a few obsessive behaviors, which is totally normal! We all have them from time to time. For instance, many of us find ourselves checking whether the door is locked when we go out. It's good to be aware of these things, but it's also important not to dwell on them too much. Our thoughts and attention can shape our reality, so it's helpful to try to adjust your state.

Secondly, it's so important to be more aware. Try to understand the needs behind your emotions. Why do you feel this way?

I'd love to know what kind of things happened when you were a child that made you feel this way. Because behind every one of our actions there is a certain need, it's just that sometimes we ignore it. So we have to constantly be self-aware and self-clarifying to find the root of the problem, which can be of great help.

Then you can take control of yourself and do what's best for you. We all have the power to solve our own problems, but sometimes we just don't have the strength to do something because of certain circumstances. So once you've adjusted your state, you can make choices based on your own plans and your own funds. I believe in you!

If this is really affecting your life and making you feel uncomfortable, you can always seek help from a professional counselor. They can use their professional skills to delve into the root causes in your subconscious, adjust your perceptions, heal your heart, and give you the courage to face this problem.

From your description, it appears that you may be experiencing symptoms of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). OCD is a mental illness characterized by recurrent and persistent obsessive thoughts and behaviors that result in a loss of control over one's actions.

The causes of OCD are not yet fully understood, but they are usually related to genetic, neuroscientific, and psychosocial factors. Compulsive shopping is a manifestation of OCD, and its core features are an obsessive need for completeness and quantity, as well as anxiety and unease about unpurchased items.

In your case, compulsive shopping may have its origins in psychological experiences from an early age. You mentioned an obsession with dolls as a child and the habit of always looking at and poking books you buy. This may be a habit you developed as a child.

With time, this behavior will become more pronounced and may manifest in other areas, such as the purchase of learning materials and online courses.

Furthermore, obsessive-compulsive disorder may be associated with personal trauma and stress. Family issues, emotional challenges, and other factors may contribute to heightened anxiety, which can manifest as compulsive shopping behaviors.

The following suggestions may assist you in reducing your compulsive shopping behavior:

1. Identify the issue: Gain an understanding of your compulsive shopping behavior and recognize its impact on your life and mental health. Be aware that your shopping behavior is a coping mechanism that helps you relieve anxiety and stress.

2. Set a budget: Establish a reasonable shopping budget and adhere to it to restrict your purchases. This can assist in controlling your shopping urges and reducing overspending and over-shopping.

3. Identify alternative activities: Identify other activities that can relieve anxiety and stress, such as sports, artistic creation, meditation, etc. These activities can help you distract yourself from shopping.

4. Form a support system: Connect with family, friends, or support groups to discuss your concerns and gain understanding and support. They can provide emotional support and encouragement, as well as help you maintain your goals and control your shopping behavior.

5. Avoid temptation: It is advisable to avoid shopping venues or browsing shopping websites in order to reduce temptation. Should you be aware that you are susceptible to certain objects or environments, it would be prudent to avoid contact with them.

6. Seek professional assistance. Collaborate with a psychologist or therapist to receive professional psychotherapy and counseling. They can assist you in gaining a deeper understanding of the causes of OCD and in identifying effective treatment options.

In certain cases, medication may be a viable option.

In conclusion, I advise you to tackle this issue head-on. By seeking professional assistance and taking proactive steps to manage your condition, you can gradually reduce the impact of compulsive shopping and improve your quality of life and mental health.

Dear Sir/Madam, Thank you for your inquiry. Best regards, [Name]

There are a number of factors that may be involved in the situation you describe. The following are some possible explanations:

You appear to exhibit a pronounced inclination towards perfectionism, manifesting as a desire for flawlessness and unparalleled quality. This proclivity may manifest as a tendency to purchase items and related accessories to achieve and maintain a state of perfection.

Anxiety and Stress: When faced with anxiety and stress, some individuals may find relief through shopping. The "panic of not buying" and "feeling like something is missing" you described may indicate a certain degree of anxiety and stress.

Habits and Unconscious Behavior: Habits are unconscious actions that are difficult to change once they are formed. It is possible that these habits were formed during childhood, without the individual being aware of it.

This behavior may persist into adulthood, resulting in a persistent need to make purchases.

Psychological Needs: It is possible that you have a psychological need to fulfill a certain need, such as a sense of belonging, security, or achievement. Purchasing items may provide you with a sense of satisfaction, which could enhance your sense of ease or confidence.

To resolve this issue, it may be necessary to investigate the underlying causes and identify an appropriate solution. You may wish to consider seeking guidance from a professional counselor to develop more effective coping strategies through a deeper understanding of your inner needs and emotional experiences.

Additionally, you may wish to consider making gradual adjustments to your shopping habits and learning to regulate your spending in order to avoid unnecessary wastage.