A 20-something girl, scared after being scolded by a doctor, now dares not to go to the hospital. What should she do?

Hello!

Hug you! You have really been through a lot, drifting north alone, suffering from chronic illness for many years, going to the hospital to get medicine, and being innocently scolded by the doctor. I can really understand the shadows of fear and helplessness in your heart. But I'm here to tell you that I'm going to help you overcome them! I'm going to bring you warmth and support with my hug!

In fact, when we delve into the real lives of each individual, we will find that almost everyone's life is not easy. Everyone has their own pain points and their own accumulation of negative emotions. So when we see this, we can understand that people cannot always be defined by right or wrong—and that's a good thing!

For example, it's totally understandable that you only came to pick up the report on Saturday. We all have our own difficulties! The doctor was just trying to worry about you and hope that you would pay more attention to your illness.

And his teasing about your hometown and his scolding of you may have been an outlet for the negative emotions in his life, such as the fact that his job as a doctor is really exhausting, which has nothing to do with you and is not your fault. And we can also see that the doctor asked very detailed questions, which is actually being responsible for his patient. Some people just have a sharp tongue but a kind heart—and that's a good thing!

But he has passed on his negativity to you, and you are innocent. If you had enough energy, you might have confronted him at the time for taking it out on you, but that wouldn't have solved the problem, would it? And after all, he is your doctor, and you need his help!

So you can now find a way to digest your own negative emotions and separate them from his emotions. Tell yourself, "I'm not wrong, I'm not responsible for other people's emotions."

What your doctor friend said was spot on! Doctors work under a lot of pressure, but they shouldn't take it out on their patients.

To save your precious emotions, you may need to think back to your past life and see if there was someone who often blamed you. The doctor's scolding has activated your memory of this person and magnified the shadow area within you. If this is the case, you can peel off this part and start fresh!

Once you've sorted out your emotions and figured it all out, it's time to move forward bravely! Even if you do meet her again, there's nothing to be afraid of. Remember, her emotions are her problem, not yours.

Take care of yourself! You've got this!

I really hope Hongyu's reply helps you out! Thanks so much for asking.

Hello,

Seeing the words is like seeing your face. I'm here for you, my dear. When I saw the last sentence, I felt so sad. When I saw the word "hospital," I shivered and wanted to cry. I think this is not a problem that can be solved by just changing hospitals! Rather, you are resisting and afraid because you are emotional and you don't trust hospitals. I'm here to support you.

Could I ask what you think of when you think of that doctor's behaviour? I can imagine it makes you feel scared.

I believe that the person who was able to cause you so much harm may have made you think of a lot of unhappy things.

Perhaps we could revisit the question itself. What do we typically go to the hospital for? To see a doctor, of course. And what do doctors typically go to the hospital for? To work, of course! Could working sometimes include scolding patients?

I wonder if this doctor has studied medical psychology. It would be helpful for him to learn to control his emotions better. Perhaps we could find an opportunity to report and complain about him.

It would be beneficial to consider how we deal with PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder).

It's understandable to feel uneasy when you're in a hospital setting. It's possible that you're experiencing a form of post-traumatic stress disorder. It's okay to feel this way. You can always seek comfort from those around you.

It is important to remember that the world is not as scary or as bad as we often perceive it to be. There are many good and great doctors in the world who are there to help us.

For example, there is Dr. Tao Yong. You may find it helpful to read a book written by Dr. Tao Yong during his recovery after being unable to operate on patients after being attacked. The book is called Guan Mu (The Gaze).

Dr. Tao Yong is very good at taking care of patients and thinking about their needs. In addition, there are many other excellent doctors in the movie "Chinese Doctor" who have made significant contributions to the fight against the epidemic.

It is important to accept yourself.

It is understandable to feel afraid of hospitals and to cry when you see them. It is important to remember that everyone feels this way when they see disrespectful doctors in private hospitals.

It's okay, Bao. We can wait to go to the hospital for now. You can buy medicine online, find a doctor from Alibaba Health to prescribe it for you, and then you can buy it.

After reading Dr. Tao Yong's book and the movie "Chinese Doctor," I was heartened to see that there are still so many good doctors in the world who are responsible, kind, and respectful, and who protect their patients. I would encourage you to take some time to process your emotions. In the future, perhaps we could consider going to a large public hospital. I don't think a small clinic or a private hospital would be the best option at this time.

I hope my answer is helpful to you. I wish you all the best.

Hello. I can see you're troubled. I hope I can help.

You're afraid of being scolded by the doctor. This is because you have chronic diseases and you're worried about seeking medical treatment because of the doctor's rude attitude. I understand your anxiety and confusion. Let's try to improve your mood by:

First, know your goals. The doctor and patient both want to treat the disease as much as possible. Your past cases and feedback affect the doctor's understanding and diagnosis. Knowing this may help you focus on your condition and cooperate better.

Second, know the difference between problems and emotions. Imagine you're a doctor. You have to deal with many illnesses and stress. What if you had a patient who was confused and didn't care?

Can you remain calm? Allow the doctor to have emotions too. This will help you understand them better.

Third, use it as an opportunity to practice and learn. It's not just about seeing a doctor. We often encounter people who seem fierce but with whom we must cooperate. Avoiding the problem won't help. If you truly face it, you may discover that the other person is not as scary as you think.

If you can't convince yourself, you can change doctors.

Have a great day!

Good day, my name is Strawberry.

After reviewing your statements, I empathize with your situation. Interacting with a physician who exhibits these behaviors, I can only conclude that this doctor has significant issues. After being treated in this manner, you sought counsel from a colleague who is also a doctor. However, your colleague advised that doctors work hard and that some disciplinary actions are acceptable. I recognize that managing emotions in a professional setting is challenging, particularly for those in medical roles. However, it is crucial to maintain composure and avoid expressing negative emotions towards patients. I respectfully disagree with your colleague's perspective.

As patients, when we are sick, we are in a vulnerable state. We go to the hospital to facilitate the recovery of our bodies. Additionally, the questioner did not engage in any actions that could be perceived as provocative, so the doctor's behavior can only be described as a failure to control her emotions and learn how to be a good doctor.

I am overcome with emotion when I see a hospital now. How can I overcome this?

1. Attempt to comprehend the other individual's perspective.

While doctors are trained to handle stress, they are not immune to emotional challenges. When this doctor treated you this way, she may have been blaming you for delaying care and for not taking care of your body sooner.

After reviewing your case book, she reprimanded you for being inadequate. In reality, she was excessively superior and was attempting to disguise her inner inferiority complex. She felt superior to others, but in truth, she was afraid of being perceived as inferior. She employed self-deception to convince herself that she was amusing and satisfying to others.

The innocent individual became the object of her venting, and the question owner is understandably aggrieved and angry. Perhaps you could try to understand this doctor with low self-esteem, and remember that not all doctors are the same as this one. There are other doctors in the hospital, and the question owner can go to see them.

2. Identify the appropriate listener.

After the incident, the questioner consulted with a colleague who was also a doctor. He advised that doctors are prone to fatigue and that a degree of criticism is to be expected. It is unlikely that anyone would seek out a situation where they are yelled at for no apparent reason. This colleague of the questioner's had a rather unconventional perspective, and it may be advisable to reconsider the nature of the relationship.

It is evident that this individual is not an effective listener. When one encounters a poor listener, it can exacerbate an already negative mood. In such a situation, empathy is more important than education.

It is also important to find the right listener. You should rely on your trusted friends, who you can discover through your usual interactions. You can also try recent online platforms' confessions rooms and communities, where you can find like-minded people and see solutions to problems from other people's perspectives.

3. Be courageous and resolve this issue.

As a result of this doctor's treatment, the individual in question now has reservations about visiting the hospital and experiences distressing emotions. It is reasonable to infer that the doctor's demeanor during the interaction has left a lasting impression.

Please take a moment to reflect on the situation. Why did the doctor's actions elicit such a strong response? Apart from feelings of discontent and anger, what underlying factors contributed to the sense of fear? Could it be that the doctor's behavior triggered memories or associations?

If this is not the hospital where you received treatment previously, would you prefer to go to another facility? We advise you to tackle this issue one step at a time. If you are feeling particularly anxious, you may wish to ask a trusted friend or colleague to accompany you. Once you have had the opportunity to interact with another doctor, you may find that your concerns are allayed.

When you encounter this kind of unfair treatment, it is important to express yourself in a clear and assertive manner. It is unacceptable for any individual to be treated in such a manner when they have not violated any rules or regulations. It is your right to file a complaint if you feel that the doctor in question has not adhered to the standards of medical ethics. By taking action, you can help ensure that others are not subjected to similar treatment.

I hope my response is helpful to the original poster. Best regards,

Hello!

Host:

After reading the post, I could really feel how scared the poster was of doctors. But I also saw that she was really brave to share her own feelings and look for help. This will help her understand herself better and change her thoughts.

I'd also like to share some observations from the post that I hope will help the original poster to look at the situation from a different perspective.

1. You don't have to be in a bad mood or under pressure to swear!

From the post, I could tell that the poor poster went to the doctor, who had a very bad attitude, was very aggressive, and scolded them, as well as mocking them for being poor. After reading this, I felt really sorry for the poster.

I'm so sorry you were in so much pain. Take care of yourself, and remember that it's not your fault. It's the doctor's problem, not yours.

My doctor friend says doctors work hard, and I think that's so admirable! But who in the adult world isn't tired sometimes? They scold us for our own good, so I'll scold you for your own good.

It's just a way for them to let off steam and get their feelings out in the open. And to think that they're doing it for our own good is so grand!

Don't you think it's a bit of a sham?

As an adult, a doctor should be able to control and manage his emotions. So, don't be too hard on yourself, okay?

Don't be too hard on yourself for what someone else did wrong, okay?

2. Remember, not all doctors are like this!

The original poster mentioned in the post that he has a chronic illness and has also seen a doctor in his hometown. I'm wondering if the doctors there are similar to the doctors at this private hospital?

Not all doctors lack medical ethics, so let's go to another hospital and take a look! The medicine is almost gone, and taking care of yourself is so important, don't you think?

When we face our fears, we can talk to them. We can tell them that we know they are afraid, afraid of other people's strange looks, afraid of other people's ridicule and scolding. We can thank them for trying to protect us.

Not all doctors are like that, so don't worry! You can always change doctors and hospitals if you want to. You can try to calm your fears with a conversation like this.

I really think this will help to ease your mind a little.

3. Take action!

It's so important to remember that our emotions are there to protect us. Even if things seem really bad, there's usually a reason for it. I don't know if the original poster has had this experience, but it's worth sharing.

I remember when I first started selling, I was really nervous about greeting people and pushing products. But I found that once I just went for it, I didn't have those awful images in my head anymore!

I later realized that our emotions can sometimes play tricks on us and make up stories to scare us. But here's the good news: when we actually do something about it, it may no longer affect us. So, if you take action, our fear may no longer affect you.

4. Be your own best friend! Pay attention to your body.

Often, our emotions show up physically. For instance, when I'm feeling anxious, my heart rate increases and I feel discomfort in my heart. The poster mentioned that when they see a hospital now, their legs tremble and they want to cry.

Then, at this time, we can try to focus some of our attention on our legs and then relax our legs, allowing our attention to rest on the uncomfortable area for a while to relax. This often helps to relieve the emotions in just a minute!

This method is also used by many counselors and has been tested and found to be effective. I really think you'll like it if you give it a try!

To find out which part of your body is uncomfortable, just focus your attention there for a while. At the same time, you can learn to relax that part of your body. If you like reading, you can read the famous psychologist Wu Zhihong's book, "The Body Knows the Answer."

I really hope these will be helpful and inspiring for the poster! My name is Zeng Chen, and I'm a psychometric coach at Yixinli.

Dear Landlord, My name is Jiusi, and I am a psychological counselor. I hope my answer will be of assistance to you.

From your description, I can see that you are a particularly vulnerable and kind individual.

I believe it is inappropriate for the doctor to treat you in this manner. We are not in a superior-subordinate relationship, and he does not have the authority to scold us.

It is possible that the questioner is so accustomed to being kind that when faced with this situation, they are unsure of how to respond and have become accustomed to tolerating the other person's grievances at their own expense.

However, this kind of kindness will only lead to suffering. If you do not assert your position, you will ultimately suffer the consequences.

It is not uncommon to encounter individuals in professional settings who exhibit behaviors that are perceived as unprofessional or inappropriate. How should one respond when faced with such situations?

1. A kind heart with a bottom line.

It is not the case that kind people are bad. However, kindness that goes beyond the limits of what is reasonable is not helpful. When faced with unreasonable requests and treatment, it is important to say no and fight for your rights.

2. A kind heart with a sharp edge

While kindness is a commendable quality, it should not be exploited by others for their benefit.

Third, do not accept situations passively.

Endurance, resilience, and acceptance are all qualities of perseverance. However, acquiescing to abuse will only encourage the perpetrator to continue their actions. It is therefore imperative that you refuse.

Seeing a doctor is just one aspect of our lives. Whether it's life, the workplace, or relationships with friends, there are shadows of our lives hidden everywhere. It's like the saying goes: whenever we're having bad luck, there are always a few people who take advantage of that situation. Therefore, we have to either not be overly kind and not give in to their demands, or not give those people exactly what they want.

In conclusion, I would like to reiterate that any action taken for the benefit of others should be driven by a genuine desire to help, rather than by a sense of obligation.

I hope my response is helpful. I hope the questioner can overcome his current confusion soon.

Thank you for your time. I am Jiusi, on Yixinli. Best regards, Jiusi

Good day, I appreciate the opportunity to engage with you on this matter. It is my hope that we can collaborate on a solution. I am here to assist you in any way I can. Let's explore this issue together.

1. Navigating the northern route independently.

2. I am currently experiencing a chronic illness.

In a foreign land, I was the victim of an injustice.

I am apprehensive at the mere sight of a hospital.

The isolation and helplessness that accompany difficulties in unfamiliar settings can lead to feelings of being adrift and homesick. Navigating unfamiliar terrain and interacting with unfamiliar individuals can compound these feelings.

Individuals who experience frequent illness are more likely to feel insecure and vulnerable. During your early twenties, it is crucial to learn self-care strategies if you have a chronic illness.

Do not bear the burden of another's missteps. The conduct and discourse of the physician in question are no longer aligned with the standards expected of a medical professional. My colleague in the medical field simply stated that the situation was understandable given the circumstances.

Similarly, if a teacher is having a bad day and yells at a student, it is not an appropriate response. It is important to recognize that we should not be subjected to psychological pressure. We must understand that the behavior is wrong and take steps to avoid it.

It is imperative that we respect the individual's problem, hometown, and dignity. Respect is a fundamental aspect of interpersonal interactions. In the event of disrespectful behavior from another party, it is within the individual's rights to defend themselves.

It is important to understand that the majority of people in the medical profession are of high quality, and there is no reason to be afraid of hospitals as a result of a single negative experience. If you still have to see that doctor, you should remember that you have already paid the bill and that you are the patient, not the doctor.

There is no need to be afraid.

If it's a new hospital and a new doctor, there's no need to be concerned. We've already demonstrated our resilience by traveling north independently. We are confident that we can overcome any challenges that may arise.

The most effective appearance is one that is neither humble nor arrogant. Come on.

Individuals afflicted with chronic illnesses already face significant challenges. When a patient attends a follow-up examination at a medical facility and encounters a physician who uses profanity, it can compound the psychological burden. The patient may perceive the use of profanity as inappropriate and unprofessional, leading to feelings of doubt and self-doubt.

1. Medical professionals are expected to adhere to ethical standards of conduct, and it is unlikely that the majority of doctors would resort to scolding their patients, regardless of the circumstances. It is not necessary to discard the entire concept of medical ethics due to a single negative experience. The emotional distress caused by a negative encounter with a doctor may lead to a reluctance to seek medical care in the future. This incident also reflects certain perceptions and behavioral patterns.

Such an approach may be akin to merely expressing one's disquiet privately or avoiding the situation subsequently, without contesting the matter or asserting one's rights. Some individuals may be inclined to respond in kind when the physician initially speaks in an impolite manner.

2. It is unprofessional for a doctor to swear, regardless of whether they are in a private or public hospital. Some doctors speak in a heavy tone and are not very polite, and some patients are more sensitive and cannot accept it. This is possible, but it is unacceptable for a doctor to swear at a patient in any hospital.

If a Beijing doctor's perception of you is negatively influenced by your status as a migrant from the north, your socioeconomic background, and your chronic disease, you may be inadvertently reinforcing their arrogance. Having a negative attitude is one issue; failing to read the medical record is another. If you encounter an irresponsible doctor, you have the right to protect your interests. You can file a complaint with the medical affairs department.

It is not reasonable to expect a practitioner who has caused distress to be able to provide a cure. It is possible to change doctors or hospitals.

3. Further reading and research will facilitate growth and development, enabling the individual to become stronger through cognitive correction, learning relaxation techniques, emotional management, meditation, and other practices. When the body and mind are integrated and the individual feels relaxed and happy, the body will recover more rapidly.

My name is Xiaolan, and I extend my warmest regards to you. I wish you a speedy recovery.