How to deal with overprotection by parents and lack of independence and confidence beyond the original family?

Hello, Your parents have taken care of you and helped you a lot.

But overprotecting you has also caused you to lack independence and self-confidence. You want to become independent and confident.

I'll divide independence into three levels: taking care of yourself, money, and spirit.

1. Independent living skills. This means being able to do some household chores.

For example, doing laundry, cooking, cleaning, and shopping for daily necessities. Being able to take care of yourself is related to the quality of your life.

It's important to be independent.

Start with the smallest things. For example, washing your own clothes, cleaning your room regularly, learning to cook a dish. Gradually, you'll feel like you can do it too. Persevere and form the habit.

Second, financial independence. If you have grown up and entered the workforce,

Can you pay your own bills? Do you still need your parents' money?

If not, work hard to earn more money. When you are financially independent, your parents will trust you.

You can only be financially independent if you are also independent in other ways.

3. Spiritual independence. If you have achieved the first two aspects, you will more easily reach the level of spiritual independence.

But being financially independent doesn't mean you're mentally independent. You need to have your own mature understanding, insights, beliefs, and values.

You can enhance your spiritual independence by:

Read more books on psychology and philosophy to learn more.

Think alone. Create environments for yourself to think alone. Get along with yourself to notice your feelings and thoughts.

3. Take care of yourself. Love yourself, inside and out. You can't take care of others if you don't take care of yourself.

A person who is mentally independent is not lonely, confused, or anxious when they are alone.

This is my answer. I hope it helps!

Hello! I'm Bai Li Yina, and I'm thrilled to be able to offer you some warmth and help through my reply.

The questioner shared that he had been overprotected by his parents, who had arranged and solved everything for him in advance. This had made him feel that he could not face difficulties independently and lacked self-confidence. He was excited to change this state of dependence and was curious about what he could do to make it happen.

[Situation analysis]

You have a wonderful family, and your parents' love has become a sweet burden for you. You are like a princess, enjoying the treatment you deserve as a princess while also wanting to cultivate your ability to stand on your own—and you're already doing a great job! It's fantastic that you can perceive your over-dependence and want to change it. Very often, our goal is to achieve our goals, and we don't care about the process of solving problems. The fact that you want the problem solved by you and no one else shows that you have the ability to think independently and want to take responsibility—and you're doing a fantastic job!

Let's find ways to improve our independence!

[Questions to get your creative juices flowing]

1. From childhood to adulthood, you have encountered many difficulties and problems. What are some of the events that your parents provided solutions for you to implement? Write down some of the events that come to mind, and also write down the solutions to the problems.

2. When did you first get the idea that you could complete tasks independently? Why didn't you think like this before? Did something special happen that made you think this way?

3. What if I told you that whenever you encounter a problem, as long as you ask someone for help, it's not considered independent completion?

4. Have you ever thought about rethinking a problem after you've solved it? It's a great idea to consider what you would do if you encountered the same problem again.

I've got some great recommended methods for you to try!

Each of us has our own unique strengths! Your family and friends are also your strength. You may not have confidence in yourself because you don't like to rely on others to solve problems. You hope to be someone who can help others, not someone who is always asking for help. What you hate is the feeling of asking for help. But you can do it!

Cultivating independence is like learning a new skill. It's an exciting journey where you get to learn new things and put them into practice to confirm whether you have the ability to face the problem. The teachers who teach you knowledge will be different, and the one who must take the exam every time is yourself — it's a chance to show off all you've learned!

I can teach you that the solution to your problem may be a colleague, friend, or parent, but ultimately, you are the person who has to face the problem. You are a crucial presence, and you are the last person to focus on. Celebrate yourself every time you overcome a difficult problem, and your self-confidence will soar!

Independence is something that takes time to develop, but it's worth it! Every time you encounter a problem, you get to rethink it and figure out how to solve it this time and what to do next time. If you encounter a new problem, think about it yourself first. Before asking for help, tell the other person what you think. This is a great way to learn and grow! Don't blame yourself. These are all the necessary steps on the path to independence. You've got this!

Embrace each challenge as a chance to flourish! You'll be amazed at the transformation you'll see in yourself after a while.

I really hope these methods help you!

You've got this! Change takes time and patience, but you can do it. Don't worry or be afraid. Many people are experiencing or have experienced similar problems, but you're stronger than you think.

The world and I are with you, and we're here to support you every step of the way! I wish you an early solution to the fog in your heart and a path to finding your own most comfortable state.

A huge thank you to everyone who has liked and provided feedback! I wish you all peace and joy!

Hello!

Pat on the shoulder,

Your problem is very realistic and concerns the future, so you're already aware of it. The lack of independent decision-making ability is, first of all, a very good thing. The next step is to improve your independent decision-making ability by changing yourself.

Most people don't have decision-making power from the start. They gain decision-making ability, as well as execution and self-confidence, through self-training.

As you mentioned, during the time when you were well taken care of and your parents handled everything for you, others may have gradually become more independent of their parents. Typically, they are between the ages of 13 and 25, and they have developed more effective decision-making skills through their own life experiences and constant challenges.

So, if you want to develop your independent decision-making skills, you'll need to gain experience through real-life experiences and gradually cultivate those skills through real self-investment.

The first method I'd like to suggest is the PDCA method.

Next, you need to make a plan.

Next, put your plan into action.

Next, we'll do an inspection.

Next step: Disposal.

Since making decisions often involves taking risks and we all face challenges in life, it's important to make sure we're making the best decisions possible. The PDCA method helps us do this by making us think more carefully about our goals and how achievable they really are.

For instance, I want to take an exam at a different place, but I've never been there before. Without any experience or a reliable plan, I could end up spending a lot of energy just to get to the exam site.

With PDCA, you set a goal—that is, the plan—and then do a check of the planning process to see if it's feasible before moving on to the next step. You combine different pieces of information to create a plan that you can actually implement.

For instance, what's the best way to get there? When's the best time to go?

How long will this take? Is there a better way to do this?

If something unexpected comes up, do you have a backup plan? Any plan should include a C (check) step.

Then, in the Action implementation stage, you can better control and execute the plan. You can also repeat the four stages of PDCA iteratively, which is why it's also called "reversing the watch."

So, if you use PDCA properly, you'll feel more confident, get a better sense of accomplishment from achieving small goals, and become better at making your own decisions.

Second, you need to understand yourself and accept yourself for who you are.

Cultivating independence takes time and practice. If we don't understand ourselves and the world around us, it can be hard to make decisions. We might also be influenced by other people's ideas and perceptions, which can lead to conflicts.

So, as you go through the process of practice, it's important to keep learning and growing as a person. This will help you become more independent and improve your decision-making ability over time.

I hope these answers are helpful for you.

Wishing you the best!

Hello.

When I was young, I was just like you. I was dependent on my parents. I thought I was useless at everything. I stuttered when I spoke. I was afraid of everything. I had no independence-and-confidence-beyond-the-original-family-2704.html" target="_blank">confidence.

I have a low self-esteem because I feel that no one likes me and no one wants to get close to me when I interact with others.

I know I'll make mistakes when making choices on my own, but I'm confident I'll learn from them. I think it's because my parents have protected me too well and never let me do anything on my own, so I'm not as independent as my classmates. I'm working on it.

I was always hesitant because I couldn't do anything. I looked like a fool.

When I was young, I was convinced that relying on my parents was a bad thing. It was as if I was behind in puberty, and for a few years after I started working, I was always at odds with my parents.

I took a detour, and my relationship with my parents was very tense as a result.

Later, I studied psychology, and at first I resented the fact that my parents protected me so well. After studying for many years, I realized that there is nothing wrong with relying on your parents. I can accept this part of my character, and I am proud of it.

Once I accepted it, I was relieved and let go of the ridiculous concept that because I was dependent, I was not good. I slowly became confident and independent.

Not being completely independent and relying on our parents in some ways shows that we can trust them and that we have a good relationship with them.

At the same time, this is also one's own foundation. When one makes a bad decision, one has one's parents behind one. Even if I make a mistake, I have a way out, and they are a safe harbor where I can always stop by.

I am blessed to have such parents.

I now understand that being independent and confident means that no matter how much experience we draw on and no matter how much advice we get from others, the final choice is in our hands. We are responsible for the consequences, whether they are right or wrong.

Referring to the experience of others and asking for help is a sign of confidence and courage. It is a sign of a broad-mindedness that is open to the advice of others.

This is a sign of not being stubborn. We take other people's opinions into account, but we don't have to agree with them.

We listen to everyone's opinions and seek our parents' advice. We would be honored if our parents could give us advice and help us at any time.

We believe that we have the ability to make choices and to bear the full consequences of our choices as long as we always keep the decision-making power in our own hands.

We have grown into independent, confident, courageous, and decisive people. We learn together and make progress together.

Everyone's choices are not always right. Even parents are not always right; they are also ordinary people.

It is perfectly normal that we will not always make the right choice. Everything is not black and white; it is never that simple. There is always some gray in black and white.

There is no absolute truth in the world, and nothing is absolute. So don't be afraid. Be brave and do what you need to do. Bravely accept the consequences and be true to yourself. That is the best you.

The world loves you, and you must love yourself.

Hello. You have noticed that while your overprotective parents' love and warmth have made you feel loved and secure, they have also led to a lack of independence and self-confidence in problem-solving.

The theory of psychological development is clear: children need to experience frustration in order to develop the psychological traits that will enable them to face reality and challenges head on. Overprotective parents limit their children's ability to adapt when faced with challenges.

Furthermore, children can learn to manage negative emotions like disappointment, frustration, and insecurity by experiencing moderate frustration. Just as our immune system is not stronger in a purer environment, but needs to be exposed to a certain amount of complex and diverse substances to develop more fully, our psychological resilience also needs to be enriched through exercise. This includes love, achievement, and satisfaction, as well as the experience of loss, frustration, and powerlessness.

If you want to improve your independence and self-confidence, you have to allow yourself to make mistakes. It's like growing again, facing problems and challenges (including interpersonal relationships). No one is perfect, and you're going to fall short of expectations or mess up sometimes.

We must accept our imperfections before we can take a step forward.

The psychological topic of "independence and dependence" is also known as "separation and individuation." This means that a child's independence is a process of separation from their parents, and their growth along the way is also a process of separation. This separation is not emotional alienation. It is simply the fact that parents have their own lives and responsibilities, and children have their own responsibilities. Neither is dependent on the other.

Appropriate boundaries are also needed in parent-child relationships. Think about your relationship with your parents. Are there any unclear boundaries, or are your parents still interfering or intervening in your life? Learn to say no and redefine the boundaries between you.

Change doesn't happen overnight. It often requires a long process. Cultivating self-confidence is actually cultivating patience. You'll have breakthroughs in the short term. You'll believe in your ability to change. This sense of hope isn't something you can obtain from the outside. It's something you can only slowly explore by yourself.

Start by trying small things around you. Take the initiative to make choices and decisions. Take responsibility for the results.

Hello, questioner! I'm June Lai Feng, and I'm here to help.

It's great that you're thinking about this now. It shows you're already aware of how serious the problem is, which is a great start. I can see that your parents were trying to protect you, which is a natural thing to do. But it might have meant that you didn't get as many chances to grow as you could have done.

It's totally normal to feel a bit lackluster and unsure of yourself sometimes. We all need a little boost sometimes! It could be that you haven't had many chances to challenge yourself and face difficulties.

In the psychology of Adler's doctrine, he placed a lot of importance on the autonomy and independence of individuals. He believed that human behavior and psychological state are driven by individual goals and motives, rather than determined by external factors.

Adler's theory suggests that your parents' overprotection of you may be due to their own insecurities or because they hope to fulfill their own needs by protecting you. This overprotection may cause you to doubt your abilities and worth, which affects the development of your independence and self-confidence.

From a psychological perspective, while overprotective parents may provide their children with a sense of security and a comfortable zone in the short term, this may have a negative impact on their children's independence and self-confidence in the long term.

Adler's view is really quite profound and significant, don't you think?

First of all, it's so important to recognize that everyone has the ability and right to make choices and decisions about their own lives. Of course, the external environment has an influence, but it's not all about being passive. We can actively interpret, respond to, and shape our own situation!

He believes that human behavior and mental state are driven by individual goals and motivations. This suggests that each of us has our own goals that we aspire to achieve deep down in our hearts. These goals become the internal driving force for our actions. For example, if a person aspires to become a good musician, this goal will motivate him to keep practicing and learning. He'll also overcome various difficulties along the way.

This perspective helps us see that we can't just blame external, uncontrollable factors for our behavior and state of mind. We need to look at what's going on inside us too. It gives us more responsibility and power, encouraging us to set goals and adjust our motivations to achieve self-growth and change.

It's also a great reminder to try to understand the personal goals and motivations behind the actions of others, rather than simply making judgments based on the external circumstances.

We've got some great tips to help you become more independent and confident! Here's what you can do:

It's so important to be self-aware! Take some time to get to know yourself better. Think about your interests, values, and abilities. And don't be afraid to identify your true desires and goals!

For example, you can gain a clearer understanding of yourself by reflecting on your daily behaviors and emotional responses, and analyzing your preferences and tendencies in various situations. This can be a really helpful way to get to know yourself better!

Secondly, be brave and make decisions for yourself. When faced with a choice, don't rely on the opinions and decisions of others. Instead, base your judgment and thinking on your own.

For example, when it comes to career planning, it's so important to choose a path that's right for you. Don't just follow the advice of family or friends — you've got to follow your heart!

Plus, you'll be able to tackle challenges and difficulties with a positive attitude. You'll see setbacks as chances to grow and learn, and you'll actively look for ways to solve problems instead of blaming external circumstances.

For example, when you encounter a difficult project at work, try to think of multiple solutions instead of complaining about the unfavorable conditions. We've all been there!

Then, set some clear goals for yourself! Identify the goals you want to achieve and develop a plan to achieve them. This will help you better understand your needs and motivations, and give you the motivation to achieve these goals. Learning new skills and knowledge will improve your abilities and self-confidence!

There are so many ways you can learn new skills and knowledge! You can take training courses, read books on the topic, or even chat with professionals in the field.

Next, build good interpersonal relationships! These can provide you with lots of support and encouragement, helping you to better cultivate your independence and self-confidence. You can try to establish good communication and trust with others, and seek their help and support.

And don't forget to cultivate your ability to think independently! It's so important to not blindly follow mainstream views and social trends. Instead, have your own analysis and opinions on things.

For example, when reading and obtaining information, always think critically and don't be swayed by other people's opinions. It's okay if you don't always agree with what you read!

And finally, be brave enough to accept the consequences of your decisions and actions. It doesn't matter if the result is good or bad, just accept it and learn from it so you can build up experience for future independent decision-making.

By doing all of this, you can gradually become more independent and confident. You'll also be able to move away from depending on your parents too much. It's a long-term process, but it'll be worth it!

I love you, world! Have a blast!

Hello, my name is Evan, and I work as a consultant in the field of positive psychology.

From the questioner's description, I can sense a certain confusion and urgency. In the process of growing up, if parents always arrange everything for their children, it may unfortunately result in a lack of ability to be independent after growing up.

I wonder if I might ask whether, when the questioner mentioned that their parents had arranged everything for them, they did anything rebellious when they were in adolescence. I feel that rebellion is often a manifestation of a child's pursuit of overprotection-by-parents-and-lack-of-independence-and-confidence-beyond-the-original-family-2704.html" target="_blank">independence.

It appears that the questioner may have missed out on a rebellious youth growth period, which could have contributed to some challenges in transitioning and growing up. One of the reasons for this might be a tendency to seek help when faced with new challenges.

I appreciate your concerns. It's possible that overprotection might inadvertently lead to a lack of independence and self-confidence in our growth process. Given that you've asked your question on the platform, we unfortunately don't have the capacity to discuss your concerns in depth. However, we can offer some suggestions based on your question, with the hope of gradually cultivating independence and self-confidence.

It might be helpful to consider which of your behaviors are dependent on others. You could take some time to reflect on your own patterns of behavior and thinking habits to understand which behaviors are dependent and which are independent.

It may be helpful to identify the source of your fears and insecurities, as they could be a contributing factor to a lack of confidence.

It might be helpful to set small goals. The subject could start with small, achievable independent tasks, such as shopping alone, planning a short trip, or cooking for themselves. For each goal completed, the subject could make a record. This could help the subject to feel a sense of accomplishment, which might in turn enhance their self-confidence.

It might be helpful to consider learning a new skill. Perhaps there is something that interests you but that you haven't tried before, such as cooking, programming, gardening, etc. By learning and practicing, you may find that you can improve your abilities and develop self-confidence in the process.

It might be helpful to consider joining a social group. This could be a way of finding a group of like-minded people, or participating in social activities or joining interest groups. Such an approach could allow the subject to interact with others more, learn how to handle interpersonal relationships, and at the same time find their own position and value in the group. In some mutually helpful teams, the subject could also experience the process of helping each other, and feel that the feeling of helping and being helped is acceptable.

It may be helpful to engage in some self-reflection and affirmation. Consider setting aside some time each day to reflect on your growth and progress. Learning to appreciate your efforts and giving yourself positive feedback and encouragement can also be beneficial.

It may be helpful to practice self-affirmation every day and remind yourself of your strengths and achievements. You might consider changing your self-talk and replacing negative self-evaluation with positive words.

It is important to remember that failure is a natural part of the growth process. Instead of viewing it as a negative experience, try to see it as an opportunity to learn and improve. Don't be afraid to try new things, even if you are initially unsuccessful. With time and practice, you will gain more confidence and be better equipped to handle challenges.

It is important to remember that every failure offers an opportunity to gain valuable experience and confidence. As the saying goes, when you fail at something more than others, it is because you are closer to true success.

It might be helpful to communicate with your parents about your feelings and needs. You could tell them that you would like to have more independence to grow and learn. I believe they will understand and support you.

It might be helpful to seek professional assistance if the questioner feels that they have greater difficulties in this area. A psychologist or life coach could provide guidance and support to help the questioner better understand themselves and develop an individualized growth plan.

It is important to remember that developing independence and self-confidence is a long-term process that requires time and patience. Even when encountering setbacks, it is helpful to maintain a positive attitude and believe in your ability to overcome any difficulties.

Reading and Learning: The questioner may find it helpful to enhance their understanding of the importance of independence and self-confidence and learn how to better deal with various challenges in life by reading self-help books and listening to lectures.

It is important to remember that developing independence and self-confidence is a long-term process that requires continuous effort and practice. It is natural to feel discouraged when we encounter setbacks, but it is crucial to persevere. With perseverance, we can achieve success.

Everyone grows at a different pace. It is important to find a method and pace that suits you, to work hard, and to gradually become a more independent and confident person.

I hope my answer is helpful to the original poster.

I would like to suggest a few related book recommendations.

I would like to suggest Self-Control by Kelly McGonigal.

I believe this book could be helpful for you in understanding how to control your actions and decisions, which could be beneficial for developing independence and self-management.

I would like to suggest How to Stop Worrying and Start Living by Dale Carnegie.

I would suggest this classic as a helpful resource for those seeking to overcome worries and enhance self-confidence. It offers a variety of practical methods and techniques that could be beneficial in improving one's psychological quality and self-confidence.

I would also suggest The Road Less Traveled by M. Scott Peck.

This book offers a thoughtful exploration of some of life's most significant themes, including self-discipline, love, growth, and faith. It may resonate with those seeking to cultivate independence and spiritual growth.

I would like to suggest The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey.

The seven habits proposed in this book may help you improve your personal efficiency and become more mature in your relationships, which could in turn increase your self-confidence.

I would like to suggest Thinking, Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman.

It is thought that understanding the way humans think may help us to make better decisions. This book provides a great deal of insight into the way people think, which could be very helpful in solving problems independently.

Asking Questions by Neil Brown and Stewart Killey

Asking questions is an important part of independent thinking. This book offers guidance on how to ask critical questions and thus develop the ability to think independently.

I would like to suggest another book that I think you might find helpful: Principles by Ray Dalio.

This book offers guidance on how to establish your own principles for life and work, with the aim of enabling you to make independent and confident decisions in a range of situations.

I would like to suggest The Power of Self-Confidence by Norman Vincent Peale.

This book offers a comprehensive exploration of the nature of self-confidence and provides a variety of practical methods to assist individuals in developing self-confidence.

Hello, question asker! I can see the confusion you are facing now, but I'm here to help!

Your question brings back memories of my old self!

In the past, my parents, especially my mother, took care of every detail, even the trajectory of my life.

As a result, more than eight years ago, my mother passed away due to illness.

Although her sudden death was a great blow to me, it also forced me to grow up, and I'm so grateful for that!

For example, her last wish was to be buried at sea on Gulangyu Island, where she was born and raised.

Then I went on my own to arrange for the Xiamen classmates who were going to attend her sea burial, their names, who should be invited, etc.

I had the incredible opportunity to arrange all these things myself, because my husband didn't know her Xiamen classmates.

At that time, I was so excited to take on this challenge and didn't know what to do; so I went and asked someone for advice.

Guess what? There's no one-size-fits-all method for becoming more independent.

You can tell yourself that from today on, you will do small things independently! For example, you can decide what to wear and what to eat for each meal.

Because when you were a child, you had the amazing opportunity to rely on your parents, who were there for you every step of the way!

But now you are already an adult!

For example, you are taller and stronger than you were as a child! You are also more powerful inside.

So now that you're all grown up, you can rely on yourself completely!

I'm sure the problem you're facing will be solved soon!

Now, all I can think of is the above!

I really hope my answer is helpful and inspiring to you, the questioner! I'm the answerer, and I study hard every day.

Here at Yixinli, the world and I love you! Best wishes!

I'm so excited to see what the future holds for you!

While children who are overprotected by their parents may feel happy, their individual abilities may not be cultivated from an early age. This could result in them becoming psychologically dependent. Consequently, when they grow up, they may find it challenging to deal with problems independently, lack the courage to face difficulties, and feel helpless.

While parents are motivated to prevent their children from suffering, this can inadvertently result in children losing the ability to live and survive independently. This could be perceived as the child losing their sense of self under the parents' unconscious control.

Could I perhaps inquire as to why parents do everything for their children?

It may be the case that they don't trust you to handle things without their help.

It might also be the case that they are unable to accept the outcome if they feel you are unable to handle a problem effectively.

It may also be the case that their love and concern for you has reached a level that is not entirely comfortable for them.

If they are reluctant to let you go, it may be because they need your help.

If they don't want you to make mistakes and take over for you, it might be challenging to have the opportunity to grow.

Similarly, when you are eager to find a way to cultivate your independence and self-confidence, you may not have the patience to complete a task.

If you also find it difficult to accept that you might make mistakes, fail, or give up halfway through, you may never have the courage to step out, break free from dependency, and stand on your own.

I believe that experience is accumulated through countless attempts, and that it includes many detours and obstacles.

If you encounter problems and difficulties, it might be challenging to keep moving forward. It's possible that we might find ourselves stuck in a place of self-doubt and self-negation, which could limit our chances of gaining valuable experience.

You mentioned that you feel a systematic approach could be helpful in cultivating your independence and self-confidence.

It might be helpful to consider that perhaps there is a bit of a dependency in this request. It's as if you're saying, "Please devise a set of methods that can solve my problems. Once you've arranged them, I'll do them."

Could there perhaps be a hint of dependency in there?

Could I ask whether you feel the need to get a correct answer?

Could I suggest that after you have realised these two points, you consider letting go of your expectations of others and of yourself, and focus on making yourself independent, just to experience?

As you enrich your life experience, you will gain more experiences. Even negative experiences can teach us valuable lessons about how to improve.

With time, your self-confidence will gradually grow.

I hope this has been helpful.

My name is Yan Guilai, and I am a psychological counselor. I hope you will consider taking the first step towards a new and exciting chapter in your life!

Good morning,

After reviewing your description, I understand your perspective.

Firstly, you stated in your description that during your upbringing, your parents provided you with significant care and assistance in resolving a range of issues, from academic to everyday matters. They consistently took on a high level of responsibility for your affairs. While this approach fostered a sense of family warmth, it also gradually diminished your capacity to independently address challenges.

Many individuals aspire to attain the level of learning you mentioned in your description, but few are able to do so. Parents are typically able to provide for their children's basic needs and even some material conditions, but they are not typically involved in their children's learning.

Some may suggest hiring a private tutor to assist with academic learning. The desire for one's child to succeed is understandable, but it is challenging to predict the outcome.

Furthermore, parenting and hiring a private tutor are not analogous concepts. One cultivates a mindset, while the other transmits knowledge. You perceive that your parents have constrained your autonomy, yet you are the one who is reluctant to take the initiative.

It is also understandable that parents are reluctant to relinquish their concerns, given their perception that you are not yet "safe" enough.

Secondly, you have stated in your description that as you have grown older, you have found it increasingly challenging to face life's challenges independently. You have indicated that you habitually seek help from others in response to any problem you encounter, rather than attempting to resolve it yourself.

"This dependence not only makes it difficult for me to stand out in my studies and work, but also makes me seem immature in my relationships." From the content of the description, it is evident that you have identified a compelling rationale, namely, "parents." As you mentioned in the description, the habit of asking others for help is not a negative trait. In fact, you have characterized it as a normal behavior.

It is important to understand that individuals have limited abilities, and those who are able to seek assistance when needed have a greater chance of success. It is essential to recognize that there is no inherent wrong in asking for help. The challenge arises when individuals become overly reliant on others after receiving assistance and achieving success in learning.

Furthermore, excelling in one's studies and work is the optimal way to build self-confidence. Many individuals aspire to this but are unable to achieve it.

In your description, you stated that your lack of independence and self-confidence is impeding your growth. You expressed a strong desire to develop these qualities.

"I have attempted various methods, such as completing tasks independently, but often ceased halfway through due to a lack of experience and confidence." A lack of independence can be discerned, but a lack of self-confidence is limited to a single area and is not comprehensive.

As you noted in your example, lack of experience, confidence, and perseverance are obstacles to success. No endeavor is 100% successful; rather, it's 15% dependent on fate and 50% on hard work. Experience and confidence are essential for success in any endeavor.

Please find below some advice on the subject.

1. Independence is a straightforward process. It begins with the simplest tasks, such as washing dishes or sweeping the floor. These tasks require perseverance.

2. Household chores range from simple to complex. Only when you have demonstrated proficiency in these tasks will your parents begin to recognize your capabilities. This is also laying the foundation for independence, because true independence still requires having your own space.

3. Regardless of the context, what your parents can provide has already been provided, and the remainder is up to you.

It is not inappropriate to request assistance, but it is important to do so in the appropriate manner.

The aforementioned content is for reference only.

Dear question asker,

It is recommended that you give yourself a hug.

From your description of the problem, it is evident that you are aware of yourself and have taken action. This indicates that you have initiated the process of change, which suggests that you are on the path to change.

Let us examine how this situation is explained in psychology.

Psychological Explanation of Problem 1

The impact of overprotection

A dependence may develop as a result of parents' constant overprotection, which may lead to a lack of autonomy and problem-solving skills when facing life's challenges.

As a result of the aforementioned factors, self-confidence is impaired. The individual may question their abilities and lack the confidence to face life independently, given that they were always arranged and cared for.

The relationship between autonomy and self-confidence is a complex one.

The development of autonomy is a fundamental aspect of the formation of self-confidence. When individuals are able to independently solve problems and make decisions, they tend to exhibit greater confidence in their abilities, which subsequently enhances their self-confidence.

In light of the fact that problems arise in this way, it is necessary to consider how they can be solved. The following views are based on personal knowledge and selection.

The necessity of self-awareness and cognitive adjustment

First and foremost, it is essential to recognize that an over-dependence on one's parents and an underestimation of one's own abilities represent a significant problem that requires immediate attention.

It is recommended that individuals engage in positive self-affirmation practices. This entails identifying one's personal strengths and accomplishments on a daily basis, regardless of their perceived magnitude, and offering oneself constructive feedback.

2. Gradually disengage from the situation and engage in independent practice.

It is recommended that one take small steps, beginning with small, everyday tasks such as tidying one's room or making a study plan, in order to gradually reduce one's dependence on one's parents.

It is important to accept challenges that align with one's strengths and interests. Participation in team activities and social practices, for instance, can foster growth in abilities and self-confidence through practice.

3. Form a support system

It is advisable to seek the assistance of friends, teachers, or counselors when necessary.

It can be beneficial to share experiences and feelings with others who are also facing similar problems, as it can provide inspiration and support.

4. Learning and Growth

Continuous learning is essential for developing independent thinking, problem-solving abilities, and self-confidence. This can be achieved through reading, attending courses or workshops.

Reflection and Summary: Following each attempt to solve a problem independently, it is advisable to engage in a process of reflection and summary in order to identify areas for improvement and ensure readiness for future challenges.

It is my contention that through self-awareness, gradual disengagement, the establishment of a support system, and continuous learning, one can gradually disengage from excessive reliance on parents and cultivate independence and self-confidence. This process requires time and patience, but with perseverance, significant progress can be achieved.

It is imperative to cultivate self-belief and to recognize the strength of one's convictions. By doing so, one can foster a sense of optimism and resilience. The world and I extend our love and support to you.