Intense separation anxiety; how to seek internally?

Hello, question asker!

I'm thrilled to answer your questions and help you in any way I can!

From your narrative, I understand that your separation anxiety is caused by traumatic experiences in your childhood, and this separation anxiety has brought a lot of negative impacts to your life. But don't worry! I'm here to help.

You've tried so many things! Movies, articles, code, research, news, games—the list goes on. While the results haven't been what you hoped for, I admire your dedication to trying different things.

That's why you're looking for help online!

First of all, I want to say how much I appreciate your self-awareness. It's so great that you understand that your psychological problem is separation anxiety!

I really appreciate your efforts to cure (alleviate) your separation anxiety.

This shows that you are an amazing person who is great at identifying problems, analyzing them, and finding ways to solve them. I can learn so much from you!

I've learned so much from you here!

You've made an excellent observation: your separation anxiety has its roots in a traumatic childhood experience. I'd love to hear more about the circumstances surrounding this event.

I'd love to know how you felt and what impact he had on you!

How did you overcome it? How did you move on from the trauma?

It's amazing how much we can understand about the reasons and extent of the harm caused to us by traumatic events at the time through reflection. We can even analyze how we faced the traumatic events under the circumstances at the time and how we responded after the traumatic events, which can reduce the harm caused to us by the traumatic events.

By repeating this review and analysis, you can let go of the traumatic event and free yourself from the traumatic feelings!

Your current life is greatly affected by separation anxiety, which presents an incredible opportunity for growth and transformation! You will fiercely grasp at others in interpersonal relationships, causing great discomfort and pressure to others, and thus losing the relationships and people you feel are important. Think about it: what is your subconscious grasping for when you fiercely grasp at others in relationships?

Are you repeating the traumatic event in your childhood, when you wanted to grab something fiercely? You see the traumatic event happened in your childhood, but you are still stuck in your childhood state, worrying about losing things and grabbing them fiercely. But guess what? You can change this!

You can analyze this! Is the person you are clinging to now still the same person you clung to as a child?

Obviously, times have changed and people have changed. And then, you find that the person you want to hold on to so tightly is actually the same person you held on to in childhood!

Do you feel like you want to grab someone again? The traumatic event in your childhood has given you an incorrect self-perception: that you can be easily abandoned and your needs can be easily ignored. But you know better now! You are stronger than you think.

You are so much more than you were as a child! You have grown up and are now able to protect yourself.

You will no longer be easily abandoned or ignored. You also don't need to violently grab hold of anyone.

In your attempts, such as writing code, doing research and analysis, watching the news, and playing games, these things can give you a wonderful sense of happiness that makes you forget about reality. You can do them often!

Don't pay too much attention to what other people say! It's much better to do something that can take your mind off the pain than to wallow in it.

Am I right? You say that if you do the things you used to like, like watching movies and writing articles, you will repeatedly project yourself into your current situation, which will affect your mood even more.

Since watching movies and writing articles are things you used to love doing, go for it! As for the idea that you will repeatedly project yourself into your real situation and affect your mood,

Then stop your thoughts from wandering in time, or distract yourself. If you really can't control your thoughts from wandering, let them run wild for a while.

But don't dwell on it! Let it run its course for a while, then bring it to an end.

Absolutely! Psychological problems caused by childhood trauma can be resolved with psychological growth in adulthood. You can absolutely find an inward approach.

This means you get to grow and flourish! You can trust that you will find the sunshine within.

I hope my answer can be of some help to you.

It is important to remember that when we experience anxiety, it is not necessary to force ourselves not to be anxious. Instead, it is helpful to understand and accept our anxiety, and to find ways to express our emotions in a healthy manner. This allows us to gradually heal the wounds inside. If you are unable to give yourself warmth and love at the moment, you can find it in supportive groups, where you can feel supported and cared for. In turn, you can transform this acceptance, understanding, support, warmth, and love for yourself into warmth and love for yourself.

In addition, it may be helpful to believe that our inner selves are inherently complete and self-sufficient, and that we can give ourselves the mental nourishment we need. This could allow us to truly seek within and truly find what we seek.

If I might offer you a suggestion, it would be this:

It may be helpful to try to understand your own anxiety, identify your inner needs, and express your emotions and needs in a reasonable way.

Perhaps it would be helpful to try to see that child in your childhood, that little child, and to consider what she really needed. Was it companionship, acceptance, understanding, recognition, care, respect, or something else?

It is often the case that we become anxious because we feel that something is missing inside us. When this occurs, we often feel the need to go outside in search of these things that we don't have. However, it can be difficult to identify what these things are. If we are unable to do so, it can lead to confusion. We may feel the urge to ask others for them, but we may not fully understand what we truly want. This can leave others feeling perplexed as well.

Similarly, when I began to examine my emotions and identify the underlying needs, I found myself asking, "What is my need? What need of mine is not being met, and why do I feel so bad?"

I came to understand that when I felt denied, I would often become emotional, and that I had a need for recognition. By identifying the underlying need behind my emotions and recognizing what that little girl really needed, I was able to find ways to satisfy and comfort myself in a targeted way.

I will kindly express to those who can offer me support and recognition that I need their recognition, not their negation. I will engage in activities that can provide me with a sense of affirmation and enhance my sense of self-identification. I will also engage in a variety of self-affirmation exercises to continuously improve my level of self-affirmation. I see that the helpless little girl is gradually becoming more confident and stable.

2. It is possible to seek warmth and love in relationships, but it is important to find the right people, people who can give you this psychological nourishment, in order to truly support and nourish ourselves. Otherwise, it may result in a kind of depletion, and we may not get what we want.

People need relationships, but it's important to remember that we don't have to compromise or sacrifice ourselves in a relationship to gain warmth and love. It's beneficial to seek out those who can give us understanding and support, who have love and warmth within themselves. These individuals can provide us with the warmth and love we need, as well as support and understanding. In other relationships, when you get along with them, it's natural to have self-doubt. However, when you seek warmth and love in such relationships, it can often lead to disappointment.

It may be helpful to consider three potential sources of supportive relationships. First, it can be beneficial to reflect on your current circle of friends and identify individuals who consistently demonstrate understanding, support, and acceptance. Second, establishing a counseling relationship with a professional counselor can be a valuable step. A counselor who accepts you unconditionally, without judgment or blame, can provide a safe space for you to explore your strengths, receive encouragement, and develop inner resilience. Third, joining a supportive group can be an excellent way to connect with others who share similar experiences. In such a setting, members can provide mutual support, encouragement, and insight, helping you to recognize your own resources and strengths that you may not have fully acknowledged.

3. Our inner self is inherently complete, and we have all the psychological nourishment we need. It is important to be sure of this and to activate the power of love inherent within yourself through constant practice of self-care.

Ultimately, we must turn inward because relying solely on external sources of support is inherently unstable. No one can provide us with unwavering stability and warmth, except for ourselves. It is essential to recognize that our inner selves are inherently complete and perfect in their own right. We all require love, warmth, and strength, and our inner selves possess these qualities in abundance.

I would like to suggest the book The Power of Self-Care, which offers guidance on how to practice self-care. By consistently caring for ourselves, we can nurture the caring system within ourselves and cultivate a sense of warmth and love. This approach allows us to connect with our inner selves and respond to life's challenges with a sense of acceptance, love, and support.

Please feel free to refer to this information as needed. Wishing you the best!

Hello, I'm Xin Tan, Coach Fei Yun here. Life is a beautiful journey, not for appreciation, but for blooming.

Holding someone in your arms from a distance, facing separation anxiety, makes you feel miserable. You've been trying hard to change and seek a breakthrough through writing articles, watching movies, etc., but it doesn't make you feel any easier. Let's share and discuss how to "turn inward."

?1. Always seeking outside help is a dead end. You're your own best support system.

As you've analyzed yourself, the trauma from your childhood has caused separation anxiety, and you constantly seek external affirmation and recognition from others to gain a sense of security, existence, and worth.

However, when you look for external validation, you'll likely end up feeling disappointed or even despairing because you've handed over the choice to someone else. You'll constantly feel the loneliness and pain of "seeking but not obtaining."

Cultivating inwardly is about connecting with yourself on a deeper level, understanding yourself better, and learning from every experience.

You mentioned that watching movies and writing articles that involve vicarious experiences in reality might make you feel more sad and emotional.

Growth doesn't happen overnight. As long as you see a gradual improvement over a period of time, it means you're growing.

So it's important to keep an open mind and to be patient while you learn and practice, waiting for each bit of growth to come along naturally.

?2. How can we achieve inward cultivation?

Take a moment to focus on your inner self, reflect on the meaning of life, and appreciate your own value in the little things.

First, make sure you feel good about yourself and your abilities. Having a sense of worth gives us self-confidence. When we have self-confidence that looks outward, we need a material foundation to support it and the assurance of others.

Having confidence in yourself is key, and this confidence should extend to the future too. There are a few simple ways to improve your ability to love yourself: meditate and calm your mind, give yourself positive feedback all the time, and achieve self-acceptance through self-affirmation.

Writing is a way to have a dialogue with yourself. It can bring up some painful memories of growth. It's okay to face them, experience them again, and feel that pain and fear. When you were a child, you couldn't resist or protect yourself. Now, you're an adult with the strength to deal with the difficulties and pain of the past.

The past is in the past, but now you have unlimited possibilities. Take back control of your life, rewrite your story, and rewrite your destiny. I highly recommend "The Power of Self-Growth," and I hope you have a life illuminated by love.

I hope this is helpful to you. Best regards, [Name]

If you'd like to keep the conversation going, you can check out my personal website, Heart Exploration Service.

Hello!

After reading your question carefully, I fully understand the anxiety you feel from "having a strong separation anxiety" and "feeling incapable of giving yourself warmth." I'm excited to help you overcome these challenges!

I'm excited to share some thoughts with you that I think you'll find really helpful!

I'm thrilled to see your clear self-awareness regarding "separation anxiety." This is a fantastic opportunity to gain an in-depth understanding and experience of your inner self, emotions, and behaviors. It's a truly valuable and significant process!

Self-awareness is an amazing tool that can help you understand yourself better, identify your needs and values, and manage your emotions and behaviors more effectively.

For example, you can think positively and look for answers in areas such as "experiencing childhood trauma that leads to constantly looking outside for the missing warmth," "causing great disgust and stress to others," and "what to do to seek within."

So, by constantly improving self-awareness, you can absolutely achieve personal growth and development and bring more happiness and satisfaction to your life!

Separation anxiety is a common anxiety disorder that presents as excessive worry about separation or the threat of separation from people in close relationships or important places.

If separation is required or imminent, a person may feel extreme discomfort and a desire to return to the person in the close relationship.

Because separation anxiety can lead to intense feelings of anxiety and panic, even a brief separation can trigger strong physical and emotional reactions such as tension, restlessness, and fear. But don't worry! There are ways to overcome these feelings and live a happy, healthy life.

As you described, it's totally normal to feel like "clutching at the other person violently" and "being unable to do anything but focusing on the person they care about."

A holistic approach to coping with separation anxiety is a great way to get back to feeling like your best self again! It can include self-management techniques and professional psychological treatment.

We've got some great suggestions that will help you relieve separation anxiety!

First, get the help you need right away!

We highly recommend that you have face-to-face counseling with an experienced professional counselor. They can help you understand and deal with the root causes and triggers of separation anxiety, and provide you with relevant treatment recommendations.

Because everyone's situation is unique, the best solution is a treatment plan that adapts to individual needs!

A professional counselor can develop an appropriate treatment plan based on your specific situation to help you relieve separation anxiety and improve your mental health. This is a great opportunity for you to get the help you need!

Second, it's time to learn and improve some coping skills!

Guess what? Relaxation techniques such as the simplest deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, and meditation can help reduce anxiety and panic.

These techniques are easy to incorporate into your daily life, especially when faced with separation triggers. They'll help you stay calm and collected!

On this basis, you can gradually adapt to and reduce your anxiety about separation by gradually exposing yourself to separation situations, such as leaving people in close relationships for a period of time. It's a great way to build your resilience!

Then, it's time to gradually increase the time and distance of separation! You can do it! Take it one step at a time and slowly challenge and change your own way of thinking.

And once again, develop your own healthy lifestyle!

Always maintain a positive and optimistic attitude! This has a wonderful, positive effect on your ability to give yourself warmth.

And there's another great reason to maintain a positive and healthy lifestyle: it's important for mental health!

The great news is that you can reduce anxiety symptoms and alleviate a negative mindset by making some simple changes to your lifestyle. All you need to do is make sure you get regular physical exercise, good sleep habits and a balanced diet.

And finally, it's time to establish your own support system!

Absolutely! You can seek support and understanding from family members, friends, and other close people.

Sharing your feelings and concerns is a great way to help yourself cope better and relieve anxiety!

I really hope this helps a little!

Good morning. I am a mindfulness coach, and I am pleased to be able to offer you some advice.

From your description, it seems that you are looking for an inward approach. How can you remove this separation anxiety from others and become more productive?

I will then assist you in organizing your current situation based on the following information, with the aim of providing you with some assistance.

As a result of a childhood trauma, you have developed a tendency to seek warmth and care from others. This has made you highly sensitive and meticulous in your interpersonal relationships. You are adept at discerning whether a person is sincere and capable of treating you well.

Once you have confirmed this, you will devote your full attention and commitment to the relationship, seeking to be in his presence at all times, for the sense of security it provides.

Given your perceptive nature and awareness of the other person's kind and tolerant demeanor, you recognize that even if they make a request, you will always inquire about spending time with them. Regardless of your emotional state, there may be instances when the other person is unable to decline and ultimately agrees to the arrangement.

However, you are reluctant to discuss the matter with the other person, as you wish to avoid any potential conflict. Consequently, you have been seeking external sources of support and guidance to address your concerns. You recognise the need to improve and grow, but you are unsure how to proceed without causing distress to the other person.

I would advise you to take the time to clarify your own point of view. This will help you to think divergently based on your own principles, rather than those of the other person.

It is important to recognise that we often prioritise our own emotional state, which is not selfish behaviour but an indication of greater self-awareness.

As an illustration, if you are experiencing a modicum of unease and insecurity today, you may wish to adopt the "I" position and inquire of yourself, "Why am I feeling this way? It's because I'm alone during the Chinese New Year holidays, and I'm feeling the lack of security caused by my childhood trauma."

I have been attempting to make adjustments for a number of years, and I am just beginning. While progress has been slow, I am confident that I can make the necessary adjustments and regain my optimal state.

A monologue of this nature is an example of introspection, with the speaker as the starting point, that is, focusing on the speaker's current state of mind.

You were experiencing a high level of distress, which may have manifested as panic, unease, or fear. It is important to recognize these feelings and explore ways to alleviate your discomfort.

It is not uncommon for individuals to have a close relationship with a select few friends, to the extent that they find it challenging to maintain distance. In such cases, external factors may be relied upon to provide a sense of numbness and forgetfulness, as there is a lack of effective coping mechanisms to address inner feelings.

You have also observed that engaging in activities you enjoy, such as watching movies and writing articles, has the effect of bringing your real-life situation into focus. This is because your capacity to be alone still needs to be continuously strengthened.

As people grow older, they often experience feelings of loneliness due to the natural process of people slowly leaving them. It is important to learn to be alone.

When first attempting to practice positivity, it is possible that a thought may arise. In such an instance, it is advisable to become self-aware. Should fatigue and a desire to escape arise, it is acceptable to allow oneself to engage in activities such as watching the news or playing games. It should be noted that it has been a significant period of time since this state of mind was formed, and it is a process to adjust back to the optimal state.

As a result, you may wish to consider trialling this approach yourself. Should you be experiencing internal fluctuations or feelings of distress, we would advise you to organise your thoughts, visit my personal homepage and submit any questions you may have about your situation. I will do my utmost to assist you.

I will await your reply and wish you the best in the meantime.

Dear author, It is a pleasure to meet you.

I can sense the pain and confusion you are experiencing due to your traumatic childhood experiences, and I understand your desire to look within and find the warmth of your own self.

First of all, I would like to say that everyone has their own way of dealing with emotions and seeking inner balance. It is important to find a way that suits you to face and deal with these issues. In the past, you may have been unaware of yourself and not handled relationships well, which has led to your regrets and remorse.

Secondly, in response to your observation that engaging in activities you enjoy can sometimes lead to a re-experiencing of past traumatic experiences and subsequent mood swings, it might be helpful to consider exploring new interests or activities that you haven't tried before. This could help to create a more balanced and positive emotional experience.

For those things that don't require emotional investment, such as writing code or doing research and analysis, they can bring you a sense of joy, which is not a form of self-avoidance. At some point, shifting your attention to other things and allowing yourself to temporarily forget your troubles is an effective way to protect yourself. However, you might also consider slowly exploring and understanding your inner feelings during these activities.

As for how to turn inward, it's important to understand that this is a process that takes time and practice. Here are some suggestions that may be helpful:

It may be helpful to pay attention to your inner feelings, emotions, and thinking patterns. You might find it beneficial to try to understand yourself better through meditation, keeping a diary, etc.

Secondly, it is important to be kind to yourself, to accept your imperfections, and to accept the regrets of the past, allowing everything to happen.

3. It may be helpful to learn how to take care of your physical and emotional needs, such as eating well, getting enough sleep, and exercising moderately.

Fourth, it would be beneficial to establish healthy relationships. It is helpful to spend time with people who support and understand you, and sharing your feelings and experiences with them can also be beneficial.

If I may, I would like to suggest two books for your consideration:

Emotional Intelligence: The book offers guidance on how to regulate one's emotions, enhance emotional intelligence, and navigate interpersonal relationships and emotional challenges more effectively, while also providing strategies for managing separation anxiety and stress.

The Art of Loving introduces ways to cultivate and develop the ability to love, which can help with interpersonal relationships and emotional issues, as well as with separation anxiety and stress.

Change doesn't happen overnight, but every step is a step in the right direction. I hope you can find your own inner peace and warmth. If you'd like, you can also talk to me more about how you feel, and I'll always be here to support you.

I believe that knowledge and action are two sides of the same coin. I hope that our future lives will be filled with joy.

I would like to suggest that you offer the questioner a hug. I can sense the questioner's inner turmoil. The Buddha once said, "Find peace within your heart; do not seek it without." What he meant was that peace already exists within us, and we don't need to seek it from others outside our body.

The questioner's behavior may be attributed to a lack of adequate security and attention during their formative years. Despite having reached adulthood, they continue to seek the same level of love and warmth they were deprived of in their childhood.

The questioner is aware of his need for warmth but is uncertain about the source and type of warmth he seeks. I believe this is also the reason why the questioner tends to rely on others during interactions, due to a fear of being abandoned. He is concerned that if the other person leaves him, the attention, care, and warmth they provide will also cease, leading to a need to confront challenges he is reluctant to face.

If the questioner wishes to conduct an introspective analysis, it is first necessary to accept the current situation and associated emotions. This will facilitate the perception and observation of inner emotions, such as the expression of anxiety and restlessness, as well as the identification of underlying desires. Once these questions have been clarified, a deeper understanding of the self will be achieved, leading to the resolution of many issues. The subsequent step is to determine how to satisfy oneself in light of the actual situation. For instance, when the incident occurred during one's youth, the individual was relatively weak and lacked the capacity to undertake certain actions. This is a reality that cannot be forced and must be accepted.

I have undergone a significant transformation. I am now capable of achieving numerous tasks that previously eluded me, and I am able to provide the fulfillment that I previously could not offer myself. However, my subconscious still perceives me as the same individual who struggled to safeguard and satisfy myself. Consequently, I am seeking warmth and support from others.

Naturally, I am not suggesting that simply stating this will immediately resolve the issue. I am merely offering some suggestions for consideration. The specific actions still need to be practiced and experienced by the original poster. Only the original poster can determine the potential benefits. Until they do so, it is not possible to know.

If you experience separation anxiety about a colleague or business partner, it may be due to a lack of compatibility in your respective magnetic fields. This can lead to the generation of negative energy and emotions, which can negatively impact the working relationship. To correct this, it is essential to understand how to truly love and support others, and to adapt to their needs to repair and avoid or reduce negative emotions.

To truly love others is to wish and give others happiness, and to do so for everyone, the outstanding, the ordinary, including the weak. It is important to mentally accept and forgive, and to correct mistakes or shortcomings if possible. Everyone also has the right to happiness. People can bring each other spiritual comfort and even joy. It is beneficial to love and accept others and oneself, to tolerate shortcomings and deficiencies, and to be kind at heart. This is particularly important in the context of benefiting others or society, and avoiding disdain or rejection of ordinary people, as well as jealousy or intolerance of outstanding people.

If you find yourself incompatible with the magnetic fields of most people, it can lead to negative energy and emotional problems. To foster positive relationships and careers, it is essential to love others, adapt to people and situations, and align your energy field. Sharing your thoughts, interests, and experiences with others, both in person and online, can help you connect with like-minded individuals and build meaningful relationships.

Furthermore, it is important to embrace a positive outlook on life and find contentment in the smaller things.

Negative energy can affect your health. To maintain optimal physical comfort and wellbeing, consider incorporating full-body massage into your routine. Head massage encompasses the forehead and face, which also feature meridian points. Perform deep, firm massage with your hands, utilize a firm massage comb on the head, and avoid pressing the stomach on an empty stomach.

If you are experiencing negative emotions or thoughts, feeling uncomfortable or unhealthy, facing challenges in your interpersonal relationships, or encountering difficulties at work, it may be due to an excess of negative energy. Individuals who are overly self-centered or self-absorbed tend to accumulate this energy, which can negatively impact their ability to connect with others. To foster positive relationships and overcome challenges, it is essential to learn how to truly love others, adapt to different situations, correct your energy field, manage negative emotions, resolve conflicts, improve interpersonal relationships, and effectively address the aforementioned issues. If necessary, you can also support those around you in their growth and development.

Hello! I can see from your description that you've had some tough experiences in your childhood, which have led to some strong feelings of separation anxiety and a fierce dependence on others. It's totally normal to feel this way! I've also experienced this, and I know how hard it can be to find that inner warmth. I've learned that the best way for me to cope is to engage in objective activities that help me forget reality for a while. I'm here to support you in finding your own way to cope!

I feel your loneliness, anxiety, and loss, and I'm here to help!

These emotions may be caused by childhood trauma, separation anxiety, and a tendency to rely on others, making it difficult for you to find inner security. You may not like to escape from yourself, but you can! There are so many ways to temporarily escape from reality. You may confuse and self-blame yourself, but you can also learn to love yourself.

In this case, we absolutely must first learn to love ourselves so that we can better love others! Learn to observe your emotions, don't avoid them, and accept your inner experiences.

It's time to create a safe and warm inner environment for yourself! You can adjust your emotional state through calm breathing, meditation, and physical relaxation, and establish the habit of self-care. Just imagine how amazing it would feel to have a few minutes of self-care practice every day to better connect with your inner needs!

You can start with small things around you, like cleaning your room, organizing your closet, and insisting on morning jogs every day. You can also slowly cultivate your hobbies and interests and learn to talk about your feelings. It's totally normal to say that doing something will make you happy and forget reality. When we're immersed in something, we ignore external things and forget our worries.

You have the right to choose your own way of life! As long as it makes you happy, go for it! When we learn to accept our true selves, we become stronger inside and are better able to face the future.

Wishing you the very best!

Hello, question asker!

From your description, I can feel your inner confusion and helplessness, but I also see your amazing ability to perceive this uncomfortable emotion and to face it bravely!

After reading your description, I feel for you because your childhood experiences have given you some very uncomfortable experiences that affect your current life and make you feel helpless. But I want to say that when you become aware and come here, you are already on the path to change—and that is an amazing thing!

Because of some experiences when we were young, we feel insecure inside, so we want to get things from the outside. But here's the thing: when we get things from the outside, not only do we get tired, but we also cause trouble for others. So, what can we do instead?

In addition, I can see that you are constantly looking for solutions to your problems, such as working. This is great! However, you feel that this is a kind of escape. You feel very powerless and a little overwhelmed. Is that right?

All problems are our resources! We are experts at solving our own problems! Based on your description, I have some suggestions for you. I hope they can help!

First, be more aware and clarify!

When we encounter these uncomfortable emotions, it's important to be aware of them. And when do we not feel this way? When we are not feeling this way, it's a great opportunity to reflect on what kind of state of life and environment we're in!

When this kind of emotion has appeared before, how did you face it and adjust your state? In fact, each of us has amazing resources, but sometimes we ignore them. We can do this! We must constantly be aware and clarify our emotions, while also tapping into our potential.

This will give us the strength to change—and we can do it!

Second, try talking to yourself!

You were looking for warmth, love, and security from the outside, and you found it! But in the process, you hurt yourself and affected others.

So, my personal advice for you right now is this: when you feel uncomfortable again, try talking to yourself. Use positive self-talk and meditation to talk to yourself in this state and tell yourself, "I see this emotion in me. I am working hard to change and I will get better and better." When this emotion arises, you will gradually gain strength from giving yourself this positive reinforcement, and you will be able to seek inward.

And then, get ready to release those negative emotions!

I want to tell you something really important: everyone has their own confusion and uncomfortable emotions. This is totally normal. When you come here, you have actually overcome many people who have emotions without knowing it.

Absolutely! I also highly recommend that you release this uncomfortable emotion. When we are in these uncomfortable states, we can vent our emotions through more exercise. And during exercise, our brains will secrete a lot of dopamine to produce a sense of pleasure, which can help us relieve this uncomfortable emotion.

And then, try to believe in yourself!

I know you say that being aware of your inner feelings is very powerless and makes you feel helpless. But I want to tell you something really exciting!

No matter what state you are in at the moment, I really hope you can believe that you can change! Even if you don't believe it now, if you pretend to believe in yourself, pretend to believe in yourself, pretend to believe in yourself one day, you will become confident and learn to look within yourself!

This is what one of my psychology teachers taught me, and it's been so helpful! At the same time, we also have to

Have faith in the power of belief! You will make progress, little by little, day by day. Before you know it, you will be a different person!

And finally, seek help from external resources!

If you can adjust yourself, fantastic! If you don't have the strength to adjust yourself for the time being, you can try to seek help from a professional counselor. Let them use their professional skills to dig deep into the root of your subconscious, heal your heart, adjust your perception, and give you the strength to face it.

And there's more! You can also read more books on psychology and learn more about psychology, while growing and healing yourself.

Finally, I want to tell you that there is a saying that life heals those who are willing to be healed. And I know you are willing to be healed! As long as you don't give up, keep looking and keep breaking through, one day you will be able to overcome that uncomfortable feeling in your heart and find a state of life that is relaxed and comfortable, that you love yourself and have inner strength.

I'm thrilled to recommend a few books to you that I think you'll find really helpful!

I'm so excited to share these amazing books with you! They're all about self-love, healing, and finding happiness. "Mr. Toad Goes to the Psychologist," "Mirror Exercises," "Love Yourself Every Day," "Rebuilding Your Life," "5% Change," and "The Brain Code for Happiness" are all must-reads!

Hello! I'm thrilled to answer your question. I hope my suggestions will be helpful for you!

To help you pay more attention to the inside and ask inwardly, we can use examples to judge these questions.

Let's talk about the fun question of what to wear in cold weather!

1. A and B say it's cold, so you get to add a layer of clothing! For B, this is an external demand on the internal self.

2.b One day, you noticed that you felt cold when you went out, so you turned back and added some clothes. At this time, you were paying more attention to your own perception than to your own requirements.

3. a and b say it's cold, so you should add a layer of clothing. At this time, b feels the temperature outside and indeed feels cold, so he adds a layer of clothing. This is also an internal perception of the self, not following the instructions of a.

4. a and b say it's cold, so you should definitely add a layer of clothing! b also perceives that it is indeed getting colder, so he adds a layer of clothing himself. Afterwards, he tells a that it has indeed been cold the past two days, and reminds a to add a layer of clothing as well, so as not to catch a cold. At this time, it is both inward and outward, and it is mutual care and consideration—it's a great example of how we can look out for each other!

When we focus on the inside, it can be a bit vague, but that's okay! It's often a third possibility, which is great because it means there are more options. We might not be immediately aware of whether we want to do something or whether we feel happy doing it, but that's okay too! It's not as clear as hot and cold, so we can't immediately perceive the answer. But that's what makes life exciting!

So what we need more is to sort out our own feelings, clarify our own interests, love our own goals, and then combine some suggestions from the outside world to think about whether they are true self-feelings or whether people outside think our self-feelings. This is an exciting process!

For example, I absolutely love watching anime! The outside world might say, "You like it because everyone born in the '90s likes it, so you like it as a member of the '90s generation and to have common ground with others, but you don't really like watching anime."

At this time, we will indeed have self-doubts because we have never thought about this deep-seated problem. But that's okay! We can work through it by combining our own thinking, for example, by sorting out our own interests and hobbies. And we can do it our way, without worrying about what others think. Even if no one around me likes watching anime, I will like it. Then this is the true meaning of self-sorting, which is the internal self-care and self-fulfillment.

Once you've sorted through your thoughts and doubts, you can express your feelings with confidence. You can say, "This is something that makes me feel relaxed and happy. I like it."

And it works both ways! When we give advice to others and use our own ideas to demand things from them, we also need to listen properly and give the other person some space to sort themselves out. When the other person has sorted out their own results and answers, we also need to trust the other person's decision-making ability and self-awareness, and combine it to improve ourselves and also to help others improve themselves.

In this process, we have the amazing opportunity to understand ourselves, understand others, and understand the sense of boundaries in the process of getting along with each other!

Just think for a moment about how much you can understand about each other. It's amazing how much you can learn about each other's feelings and concerns! And it's so important to understand each other. After all, you can't build a relationship if you don't understand each other. So, ask yourself: to what extent can the other person understand that you are concerned about them and that they are concerned about you? And to what extent is it a breach of boundaries that the other person will feel pressure and you will feel discomfort?

When you feel uncomfortable, it's time to speak up! Share your feelings in a timely manner, listen to each other, and understand each other's emotions. When we feel respected and cared for, expressing gratitude is the perfect way to show our appreciation!

If we find ourselves in a situation where we feel out of control, we can get help from a counselor. We can work on changing our habits from a cognitive level to help us socialize better and live our best lives!

I really hope that through self-reflection or with the help of a professional, you can become more self-aware and find a social approach that suits you perfectly!

The world loves you!

Dear questioner, I'm happy to answer your question and hope that my response can be helpful to you.

You have separation anxiety and use many ways to deal with it, like watching movies, playing games, doing the things you like, and your friends say that you are avoiding reality. You currently don't have the ability to warm yourself up, and you know you can't do it. In fact, many people are just like you, and you are not alone.

I'm curious about your background. You seem to have a strong sense of separation anxiety, which has had a significant impact on your life. It's possible that you've lost your ability to focus on pleasing others and may have lost yourself. You can turn to a platform for help and gradually find yourself again.

You've lost the most important person in your life. It's unfortunate and frustrating when you cling to someone and put pressure on them, which can make them feel resentful. Being able to live consciously is also a form of growth.

We all experience challenges and feelings of being ignored or abandoned as we grow and develop. How can we overcome these challenges?

It's important to face challenges and fears head-on. The way parents raise us is also influenced by traditional thinking. They don't want the next generation to suffer as they did, and they try to give their children what they think is best, even if it's not what the children want. Kids will hate out of love and hope that their parents will do things their way, which can lead to some pretty tricky situations.

It's easy for kids to think that if their needs aren't met, they aren't loved. In the parents' generation, it was tough to survive, let alone have their own needs met. They also struggled to understand their kids' needs. Nowadays, you're eager for spiritual needs and hope to be supported and understood, but parents are always worried about whether their kids are eating well and drinking well, neglecting their emotional needs. This is a wrong direction, and all your efforts will be in vain.

Separation anxiety is also fear of the future. Childhood experiences are replayed, such as the rejection and indifference of important people. Does it all bring back memories for you? She ignored me, I'm not good enough, I'm alone again, I've been abandoned again, don't leave me, you are the director, constantly reenacting the plot, directing and acting in the fantasy.

Is this really happening? Licking my wounds alone in the midst of my own heartbreak, I feel so pitiful. In the mindset of the weak, where is the energy? I've now grown up and understand the limitations of my parents. They've already given you the best they could.

It's clear that parents often treat their children as if they're their own private property, without much consideration for the child's individuality. This can lead to either the child copying their parent or rebelling. What are your thoughts on this?

I don't know what you've been through, but I know that relationship problems can also be caused by communication barriers and cognitive biases. It's important to have the support of a group when you're going through them. The premise of inner cultivation is also knowing yourself. Living a conscious life is constantly supported by external forces, which enhances a sense of worth and being yourself.

By giving consistently, they build a larger network. By releasing emotions with the support of external forces and a strong sense of self-belief, one's inner strength is enhanced.

External and internal forces go hand in hand and are inextricably linked.

Many people have surpassed themselves by accepting who they are, having the desire to grow, and living a conscious life.

I wish you the best of luck.

Hello, host! I'm thrilled to answer your question. As the information states, due to childhood experiences, you constantly seek warmth from the outside and have a strong separation anxiety.

It will grab the other person with a wild, passionate intensity, causing them to feel a rush of disgust and pressure. This person has lost someone important in the relationship.

I don't think I have the ability to give myself warmth, and I don't want to affect others. But I'm excited to explore new ways of giving myself that same feeling of warmth! I'm looking forward to trying out new activities that I used to enjoy, like watching movies and writing articles. I'll be able to empathize with the content of the movie or article in combination with my own reality, and it will affect my mood in a positive way!

Writing code, doing research, watching the news, and playing games are my absolute favorite ways to forget reality and have some much-needed fun! Some people say that this is escaping from reality and ignoring your own feelings, but I say it's a great way to take a break from reality and enjoy a little bit of me-time!

So, how can we seek within?

You have a very insightful understanding of your own childhood trauma, which has led to a constant outward seeking of warmth. You need a stable external environment, and you output warmth, which in some form leads to an excessive dependence on the external environment and important individuals. This dependence is a form of control for others in your surroundings.

It can lead to impatience and stress, which we all know are not good for anyone! It is the main cause of losing important relationships, which is a shame.

Because any relationship is about mutual achievement, not mutual control—and that's a great thing!

The article also states that you will only feel a temporary sense of happiness when you forget about reality while writing code, watching the news, playing games, or doing research. It also says that this is a form of self-avoidance and ignoring your own feelings. This view is half right. It is indeed a form of self-avoidance and ignoring your own feelings. But here's the good news! You can choose to change this behavior.

This behavior is a great way to protect yourself! When you're facing a big threat, it's totally normal to want to avoid it to keep yourself safe.

To turn inward, you first need a strong self-function that will not easily allow the surrounding environment to harm you. This is where the magic begins! Seeking help from a professional psychological worker is the first step. Let them help you cultivate and train this weak self that you carry within yourself. You'll be amazed at how quickly you'll be able to tell yourself that you are no longer the sensitive, weak self. And in the face of past harm, the strong self is fully capable of stopping harmful behavior and even fighting back against similar harmful behavior.

I'm thrilled to have an appointment! 1983. The world and I love you!

Greetings.

You have indicated that you have experienced trauma during your childhood, which has resulted in a tendency to seek warmth and connection from external sources. This has led to a heightened state of separation anxiety, manifesting as a tendency to cling to others, which can place significant pressure on the individual with whom you are in a relationship. You have demonstrated a capacity for self-reflection.

You are aware that you experience separation anxiety and that it is not the actions of others that cause your anxiety, but rather your traumatic experiences in the past. You are willing to change yourself in order to improve your relationships with others.

Such self-awareness and desire for self-change are to be commended.

I assume you have studied psychology, as you are familiar with the professional terminology associated with separation anxiety, self-avoidance, and introversion. I do not claim to possess superior knowledge; I am merely attempting to offer a different perspective in the hope of facilitating a shift in your thinking.

In particular, the desire to provide oneself with warmth is coupled with a reluctance to affect others and thereby impose pressure upon them. The aspiration is to enhance oneself and to cultivate strength within.

This is indicative of a desire for change. It is evident that there is a strong desire for change, which marks the inception of this process.

It is evident that the subject is currently experiencing a state of intense anxiety, which may be indicative of separation anxiety.

The aforementioned anxiety has a significant impact on one's life, preventing the performance of activities previously enjoyed. For example, the enjoyment derived from immersing oneself in cinematic productions or the composition of written articles is no longer possible due to the overwhelming influence of reality-induced anxiety.

It is evident that separation anxiety has a profound impact on one's life.

One can engage in activities such as writing code, conducting research analysis, viewing the news, and playing games. These activities allow individuals to temporarily escape their real-life anxieties, leading to a sense of happiness. However, some argue that this is also a form of self-avoidance.

The term "self-avoidance" is not entirely negative. When anxiety reaches a certain level and impairs daily functioning, individuals can employ self-directed strategies to mitigate anxiety and resume their usual activities.

Additionally, one may learn relaxation techniques to mitigate anxiety. It is possible that employing one's own distinctive method to reduce anxiety may prove even more efficacious.

Anxiety has a significant impact on both physical and mental health. Reducing anxiety levels can be considered a form of self-healing.

As the Chinese New Year approaches, many couples will be separated from one another as they return to their respective families. This temporary separation may result in a lack of physical contact and emotional connection between partners.

Such an intimate attachment necessitates direct visual, tactile, and physical contact in order to be fully experienced. In the event of a temporary separation, a variety of techniques can be employed to facilitate the expression of inner feelings, thereby reducing anxiety.

For instance, the most efficacious relaxation method may vary from one individual to another. The method that is most suitable for a given individual will, therefore, be the most effective.

Systematic desensitization therapy in behavioral therapy is a method that induces the person seeking treatment to enter the situation that causes anxiety, and then counteracts the anxiety through a state of mental relaxation. After relaxing hierarchically many times, the anxiety is eliminated. It may be assumed that the reader has some knowledge of psychology; therefore, it is recommended that they either find a professional or attempt to learn on their own.

Separation anxiety is a psychological reaction that humans exhibit from childhood. Infants require their mothers the most, and they will vocalize distress for an extended period when separated from their mothers, which is separation anxiety.

In adulthood, individuals may utilize technological devices and visual media to navigate interpersonal dynamics. However, if they persist in exhibiting childlike behaviors, it could have adverse effects on their psychological development, leading to feelings of trauma and anxiety about being abandoned.

This sense of security must mature; it may take a considerable length of time, so it is important to proceed at a pace that is comfortable for the individual.

It can be reasonably assumed that, at some point in the future, we will become relatively independent adults. This will undoubtedly present numerous opportunities for us to experience the effects of separation and to develop and mature as individuals. It seems plausible to suggest that your intimate relationship still allows you to rely on each other and to avoid complete detachment. Consequently, it could be argued that you are not yet independent and that you rely on each other to a significant extent.

It is imperative that you do not blame yourself entirely.

It should be noted that there is no universal model for intimate relationships. The boundaries of intimacy are mutually determined by the individuals involved in the relationship, and as long as both parties are satisfied with the arrangement, it can be considered an optimal state.

If the other person exhibits excessive independence, it is evident that this does not align with your preferences. It is imperative to identify the characteristics that are most conducive to your well-being.

Good day. My name is Coach Yu, and I would like to discuss this topic with you.

Let us begin by discussing the concept of separation. According to Adler, humans possess seven fundamental emotions and six fundamental desires. Among these, the desire for separation and the desire for connection are dialectically unified. This implies that separation and connection are two sides of the same coin, and that the desire for separation must necessarily accompany the desire for connection. This desire manifests throughout our lives, from the moment of birth when we are separated from our mother's body, to the weaning process which separates us from the breast, to our growth and separation from our parents, to marriage, which represents a further separation from the family of origin. The fear of separation at any stage can impede the smooth transition to the next stage of life.

Let us revisit the concept of security. In Maslow's theory, it is defined as a sense of confidence, safety, and freedom from fear and anxiety, particularly a sense of satisfaction with one's current and future needs.

If an individual was raised in an environment characterized by insecurity, animosity, and a lack of trust, these experiences can have a profound impact on their development. Such circumstances often lead to a perpetuation of these patterns in subsequent relationships, giving rise to a perception of surrounding environments as inherently insecure and hostile.

One might inquire as to whether there have been numerous instances of separation and numerous instances of connection.

Furthermore, one might inquire as to the means of sustaining the fervor and ardor in a relationship following a separation.

Additionally, it is beneficial to inquire as to the characteristics of an optimal relationship and the qualities that such a relationship would entail.

One may attempt to evaluate oneself in an objective manner, noting one's strengths and weaknesses. One should then praise one's strengths and accept one's weaknesses.

Additionally, it is imperative to acknowledge that personal growth is a prerequisite for a sense of security. As Adler, a prominent figure in psychology, asserted, past experiences are not inherently valuable; rather, it is our perception and interpretation of these experiences that shape our sense of security.

A heart-to-heart conversation between partners is an effective method for understanding each other's behaviors and expectations. As partners develop from initial encounters to a mutual understanding and affection, they gradually learn to adapt to each other's patterns. Honest expression of thoughts and concerns allows partners to gain understanding and support, while also enabling them to hear each other's expectations. Through this process, partners can establish a lasting and intimate relationship.

The following topic is that of acceptance. It is a fact of life that everyone is imperfect, and that everyone has a side of themselves that they would prefer not to acknowledge. This aspect of ourselves is what we might term the 'dark side'. Those around us are often unwilling to accept this aspect of ourselves, and we are frequently unable to face it ourselves. As a result, we put on a mask, pretending to be someone else's favourite character. However, we are tired of living like this.

One might inquire as to what aspect of the self leads to such intense interpersonal conflict.

One might also inquire as to whether the intention is to avoid affecting others, or rather to address one's own internal needs.

One might also inquire as to what message would be conveyed if this acute anxiety were to be expressed.

However, awareness represents the initial stage of change. As a result, it is possible to attempt to reconcile with our emotions. When negative emotions such as anxiety arise, we can issue a "stop" command in a timely manner, take a deep breath, and observe them without any judgment. We can allow the emotions to come and go freely like clouds and drift away slowly like fallen leaves in the water.

Additionally, one may attempt to document their current emotional state. The act of writing is a cathartic process that allows individuals to express their feelings candidly and openly. This approach can facilitate a deeper understanding of the origins and consequences of emotions, as well as assist in identifying the core issue.

It is also recommended to seek assistance, as overcoming this issue may prove challenging in the immediate term. It is advised to identify a family member or friend who can provide positive support and guidance. Should the need arise, it is possible to consult with a counselor or join a support group, as emotional distress may require an outlet to relieve its burden.

It is also important to pursue knowledge and self-development. When an individual's core is strong, they tend to exhibit greater confidence, which in turn fosters closer relationships with others.

It is recommended that the reader consult the following text: "Intimacy: Finding Your Soul Mate."

The title owner, the present is good! Be grateful for the encounter, my friend.

After reading your description, I can feel your awareness of this separation anxiety, and at the same time, how it bothers you. I'm here for you, and I'm sending you lots of hugs!

Let's chat about this together!

1. Confront separation anxiety

If you find yourself facing separation again and feeling your inner anxiety, it's time to face it head-on! Take a moment to tune in to where in your body this emotion is strongest. What shape, color, and texture does it have? What name can you give it? What object or doll does it resemble that you've seen before?

When you let go of your resistance and meet your separation anxiety with openness and curiosity, it will have less of an impact on you.

2. Accept and allow yourself, my friend.

Even if you have lost relationships and people that you once thought were important because of separation anxiety, you're doing great! This sense of guilt within us should also be seen and accepted. Believe that you are growing little by little, and that one day you will meet someone who understands you and will not leave you because of your separation anxiety.

I wish blessings on those who have lost, and I thank them for being there with you. At the same time, I wish blessings on myself, and I accept myself just as I am.

Once you've done that, you'll be able to find the strength to face up to the internal conflicts that come up when you lose important relationships and people.

3. You can heal yourself, my dear.

You can choose a professional counselor or hypnotist to help you see what you have experienced during your growth process. This will allow you to return to that past and feel what you are feeling in the present, thereby helping you to heal yourself.

It's so important to remember that we're not that little kid who couldn't make it on their own. We've grown up, and we're totally capable of living on our own. We can still make it through this without anyone, and we can create our own lives and make them even better!

You've got this! You have the ability, the conditions, and the resources. Whenever you feel separation anxiety again, remember to calm down and become aware of the emotions in your body. Hug the scared child within you and accompany him as he grows up again.

With just a little healing, you can find peace with separation anxiety.

I really hope my answer helps you out, and I wish you all the best!