Suddenly learned about my aunt's sudden death, shocked and in sorrow, a family tragedy, unsolvable?

The unfortunate circumstances of your family are indeed a source of significant distress. The experiences of your aunt and your younger aunt, particularly their unhappy marriages, serve as a stark reminder of the potential challenges that lie ahead.

You indicated that you are introverted and relatively indifferent to the people and things around you, which may increase the likelihood of falling into this kind of situation.

However, there are reasons to be optimistic. You mentioned that you are married and that your husband treats you well, which provides you with a relatively stable environment.

Furthermore, despite the potential impact of your introverted personality on your relationships, you have indicated a willingness to live your life and find joy and meaning in it. This demonstrates your capacity for introspection and personal growth.

In addition, in the context of family tragedy and the challenges that may arise from your introverted personality, we recommend the following courses of action:

1. Engage the services of a professional psychologist or counselor. These professionals can assist you in managing your inner pain and distress, and in developing effective coping strategies and advice.

2. Build Deep Relationships: Despite your introverted personality, you can attempt to cultivate deeper relationships with individuals who share your interests and values. Such relationships may provide you with greater support and understanding.

3. Adopt a more positive and optimistic mindset. Focus on the positive aspects of life and seek out positive feedback and support.

4. Practice self-care. Be more self-compassionate, prioritize your own needs, and avoid letting external expectations and evaluations overly influence your actions.

5. Seek family support. Share your feelings and concerns with your family and seek their support and understanding. The support and understanding of family members can help you better cope with the challenges in life.

It is important to remember that you are not alone in this process. Your family, friends, and counselors can all provide valuable support as you navigate this challenge.

You have the right to pursue your own happiness and inner peace. Believe in yourself and persevere.

You will identify solutions to overcome the obstacles you face.

#01: I can understand how you feel. You are not that old, you are beautiful and talented, and your aunt, who had a somewhat difficult life, has passed away. In addition to the pain of losing a loved one, you may also be experiencing shock, regret, and lamenting the injustice of the world.

From what you have shared, it seems that your aunt may have experienced some challenges in her marriage. She married a man who may have been problematic, and the couple may have endured instances of domestic violence. It is also possible that she developed symptoms of "paranoid delusions" at a later stage.

If these symptoms are indeed present, it is possible that your aunt may have some form of schizophrenia, though the symptoms do not appear to be particularly severe. This illness may have some bearing on her subsequent marital relationship, and her childhood experiences may also play a role.

While there may have been some mental illness involved, it is not necessarily the case that her early death was related to this.

Birth, aging, sickness, and death are all part of the natural cycle of life. It's important to remember that these things are normal and to try to take them in stride.

It is fortunate that your aunt divorced her husband many years ago and has been living a relatively relaxed and carefree life, which seems to have brought her a certain level of compensation for her happiness in life.

#02: You mentioned your father's somewhat unusual attachment to electrical outlets in the house, and his strong reaction after your mother unplugged them. It seems that your father may have some obsessive-compulsive tendencies and a somewhat paranoid personality.

Your sister-in-law displayed rebellious tendencies during her childhood, and her marriage did not flourish. She is undoubtedly attractive, but she fell in love with a man who was significantly older than her and had recently been released from prison. This illustrates how a lack of love can contribute to a series of challenges.

Some of the more obvious personality traits can be seen in your two aunts and your father. It's possible that genetics may not be the primary factor, and that the way they were raised and the environment they grew up in may play a more significant role.

Given their advanced age, it may not be entirely relevant to consider their opinions on the matter.

I just want to suggest that it may be because of certain personality flaws that they have experienced such challenges in life.

From this perspective, it may be helpful to consider how to create a nurturing environment for your children to grow up in.

#03: It's natural for any couple to have their moments, and everyone has a temper and will lose their temper at times. It's not cause for concern if your husband loses his temper occasionally.

In addition, he typically treats you well and has no history of domestic violence. It may be helpful to consider that the experiences of your loved ones (two aunts and your mother) may not directly impact your daily life and happiness.

It might be helpful to communicate more with your husband, talk more about your concerns, and share your thoughts and needs. This could also help him gain a deeper understanding and appreciation of you, which might naturally lead to him taking better care of you.

I hope this is helpful for you.

I appreciate the challenges you have shared regarding your family situation and the internal struggles you are facing. It is clear that family tragedies and complications can cause significant stress and anxiety.

In regard to your aunt's passing, it is clear that this is a significant loss for you and your family. The unfortunate circumstances surrounding her demise are also distressing. Regarding your aunt's paranoia about being persecuted, it is possible that her past experiences and psychological trauma may be contributing factors. In such a situation, professional psychological assistance may be beneficial.

It is challenging to comprehend the nuances of your father's conduct and persona. His tenacity, excessive concern, and persistent criticism may emanate from an underlying anxiety and insecurity.

It would be inaccurate, however, to describe him as a "psychopath." All individuals have character flaws and patterns of behavior. With more communication and understanding, you may be able to improve your relationship.

Regarding your aunt's experience, her marriage choices and relationship with her daughter were similarly fraught with challenges and difficulties. However, it appears that she has found some inner peace and a new partner, which may be beneficial factors in her life.

With regard to your own character and family relationships, it is not uncommon to experience introversion and concerns about deep relationships. It is also important to note that concerns about domestic violence are a significant and serious issue.

Should you feel your safety is threatened or have any concerns, you are advised to seek assistance without delay. This may include communicating with professionals, friends, and family.

Finally, while family tragedies and complications can make people feel powerless and confused, it is important to remember that everyone has the power and opportunity to change their lives. By seeking help, enhancing self-awareness, and improving interpersonal relationships, individuals can gradually find their way out of difficult situations and achieve personal happiness and satisfaction.

It is also important to remember and honor the loved ones who have passed away. You can maintain their memory by remembering and sharing their stories.

Hello. I am Bai Li Yina, and I am here to provide you with the warmth and help you need.

The questioner revealed that she was shocked by her aunt's sudden death and thought about her unhappy marriage. She observed that her parents' marriage was full of arguments, and her younger aunt's marriage was rebellious. Ultimately, she wants to focus on her own marriage. Although her husband is very good to her, she is still concerned that his hot temper may pose a risk of harm to her. What should she do?

[Situation analysis]

Your aunt's sudden death made you realize the impermanence of things. Your shock and grief stem from your kindness, your sympathy for your aunt's unhappy marriage, and your fondness for your aunt. You believe that your aunt's sudden death stems from an unhappy marriage. You see all kinds of unhappy marriages around you, your parents' and your sister-in-law's.

Given the numerous unhappy marriages you observed, it's understandable why you'd be concerned about your own.

We cannot know the whole picture of other people's lives. All you saw was your aunt's unhappy life, the quarrels between your parents, and your younger sister's rebellion. There were also happy times in their lives that you didn't know about and didn't see. So there is no correlation between their marriage and your marriage. You cannot apply some possible similarities to your own marriage out of fear.

They are not you. You are the controller of your own happiness. You are just a bystander to them. You are only a small part of the bystanders, but you are also the most unfortunate part.

[Questions for further thought]

1. If your aunt had not died suddenly, would you have considered the marriages of those around you to be unhappy?

2. Tell me what a happy marriage looks like. Have you ever seen a marriage that made you feel very happy?

3. Tell me, when your husband gets angry, do you get scared that you will be abused? Or is this fear only triggered by the incident with your aunt?

4. What do you like about your marriage?

[Recommended methods to try]

1. You fear that your marriage will also be unhappy. You can change your focus from fearing misfortune to thinking about how you are happier than they are, especially in the face of a husband who is good to you.

2. You are a compassionate and kind person with a soft heart. You are anything but indifferent to the people and things around you. Who thinks you are indifferent? What do you think enthusiasm should be like?

From your description, it's clear you're not indifferent. You need to get to know yourself again and stop letting other people's opinions sway you. Being introverted doesn't mean being indifferent.

3. What kind of marriage do you want? It all depends on you. You must express to your husband the emotions you feel when you are afraid of his violent outbursts, as well as your disgust and aversion to domestic violence. Communicating your inner fears to the one you love is a good way to maintain intimacy. When you speak up, you are actually facing this fear head-on. You will find that you are actually not that afraid. Hiding your fears will make them grow and take root in your heart, which is not conducive to a happy marriage.

I am confident that the above methods will be helpful.

You will get through this. It will take time and patience, but you will get through it. Don't worry and be afraid. Many people are experiencing or have experienced similar problems, and you will get through this too.

The world and I are with you. You are not alone. You will find your way out of this fog and find your own most comfortable state.

I appreciate your likes and feedback. Have a great day!

Hello!

I'm sorry to hear about your aunt. She passed away at a young age, and I know it was a shock and a sad time for you. I'm here if you need anything, just give me a shout.

You described the psychological characteristics and styles of your two aunts and your father, which are very similar. This is probably related to your grandparents' genetics, family style, and parenting style. From your description, I understand some of your concerns about whether there will be an intergenerational transmission.

The term "intergenerational transmission" refers to the phenomenon in which the psychological characteristics and behaviors of one generation are passed on to the next.

Your aunt is always suspicious that someone is harming her. She thinks that she was scalded by boiling water and that she cannot make a profit in the stock market. She also thinks that this "person" is the cause of all her misfortunes. She even thinks that someone is spying on her when she's out. She also thinks that you have been bribed by this "person."

This person is the one she once saw as a life preserver, but who she rightly rejected. You guessed it: she has paranoid delusions. This is possible.

Your father is completely narcissistic, stubborn to the extreme, and overly concerned about safety and health. He taped over all the electrical outlets in the house. Your mother is not allowed to come home until she unplugs the plug sometimes.

He makes a point, but then goes on to make all kinds of tangential remarks and give all kinds of examples, without ever getting to the point. You think he's being really unreasonable.

Your sister-in-law has always been a bit of a rebel. She left school early and married a reformed criminal who was quite a bit older than her. Later, her daughter started to rebel as a teen, fell in love with a bad boy, and had an abortion. She tried to discipline her daughter, but the daughter cut off all contact with her.

Her sister-in-law remarried to a man who is nearly 20 years her senior.

You say you're particularly introverted, indifferent to people and things around you, with no deep relationships. But your husband is nice to you, and you worry about domestic violence when he loses his temper sometimes.

I don't think you've experienced domestic violence from your husband, but you're just afraid of it. Is this similar to your aunt's suspicious nature? Suspicion can definitely affect the relationship between a husband and wife.

This might be something that's been passed down through the generations. The original sound family has had a big impact on you, and genetics plays a part, as does the influence of your father on you, and the experiences of your aunt.

You've got intergenerational transmission issues, but you're way more progressive than your folks were. Your aunt and your dad have no self-awareness and can't identify their own shortcomings.

If you're self-aware, you can identify a few problems in your family. You can even summarize the root causes of many family misfortunes through analogy and thinking. If you start, your family might develop differently and a turning point could appear.

You can't get rid of the genetic part. Your introversion and indifference can also be seen as a preference for solitude and tranquility. So the advantages are emotional stability, quiet introspection, and a high level of thinking ability. You can accept this part of yourself, accept yourself, reinterpret yourself and your loved ones with an appreciative eye, and then slowly transform.

It's important to remember that we can't trust others 100%. We need to protect ourselves and maintain a degree of skepticism. Having a "precautionary" mindset is key, and it's essential not to go overboard. Exceeding a certain degree can affect our relationships with others and might even lead to unexpected outcomes.

The world loves you, and you should love yourself too.

Dear questioner,

My name is Liu, and I am a listening therapist.

I extend my deepest sympathies to you. As I perused your account, I was struck by the resemblance between your situation and aspects of my aunt's life. I was particularly moved by your observation that the twine breaks at the most delicate points. My aunt's life, as you have described it, was fraught with challenges. From your account, it is evident that she strove to break free from the constraints that held her back and to reclaim a life imbued with purpose and joy. She endeavored with great resolve, and her life was rich and full.

To my esteemed colleagues, I hope this message finds you well. I would like to take a moment to address a matter that has been weighing on my mind. As many of you are aware, the recent passing of our

The vicissitudes of fate are often the subject of lamentation.

At this juncture, I ask your indulgence as I join you in remembrance.

I would like to take this opportunity to express my condolences to you all.

1. The aunt's demise was abrupt, eliciting feelings of disbelief and sorrow. Through the text, we gain insight into the life of this woman, whose existence was marked by adversity.

My aunt, who had endured long-term domestic violence in her previous marriage, ultimately terminated the relationship and subsequently assumed the role of primary caregiver for her daughter. Despite her exemplary parenting abilities, the psychological distress caused by her former spouse persisted. At her physical and mental limits, she sought solace in the idea of a savior figure.

The dissolution of this fantasy resulted in a psychological crisis for the aunt.

It is important to note that these are merely speculations, not assessments. Based on the available information, it is possible that my aunt was experiencing significant psychological distress at the time. The successive challenges she faced may have led her to perceive a presence within her, causing her feelings of insecurity and fear.

Long-term psychological problems that are not promptly addressed through scientific treatment can result in significant psychological distress and may manifest as physical symptoms.

As we age, our resistance and other physiological functions also decline. We may also have physical health problems, but we do not pay sufficient attention to them and do not undergo regular physical examinations, so pathological problems become increasingly severe.

In your words, I have been pondering the following: "If" I had the opportunity to receive comprehensive physical and mental healthcare, including timely diagnosis and intervention, or "If" I had undergone a timely health examination that would have identified the underlying cause. However, at this juncture, I also recognize that

There are few opportunities for alternative actions in the course of a lifetime.

It is not possible to travel back in time to rewrite history; therefore, the only option available in the present is to live one's life to the fullest.

It is recommended that you simply live your life to the fullest.

I extend my sincerest apologies.

I extend my sympathies to you in the form of a gesture of comfort and affection.

2. Is there no solution to family tragedies? It is this author's opinion that while one cannot change another person, this tragedy can perhaps be rewritten in our generation.

In your account, it is evident that your father, your aunt's brother, has caused significant distress within the family. He appears to exhibit paranoid tendencies and is the source of frequent conflict within the family unit.

I believe it was similarly challenging for you. Another sister-in-law also endured a difficult life, but she has now met a suitable partner. I posit that the personalities and circumstances of three children in a family are not shaped instantaneously. They are also constrained by a painful past, and the influence of the preceding generation's family of origin cannot be discounted.

In that era, a dearth of resources and the constant struggle to put food on the table meant that grandparents often neglected to prioritize mental health education for their children.

From a macro perspective, the observation of families or even clans evokes a profound sense of powerlessness. The phenomenon of tragedy can be likened to a poisonous vine that ensnares its victims. In the field of psychology, the concept of intergenerational transmission is worthy of note.

One can observe the perpetuation of unfortunate circumstances within family units.

And is transformation truly unfeasible?

I believe that the most challenging aspect is recognizing it.

As awareness of the issue has grown, so too has the scope of popular psychological education. Many individuals have dedicated themselves to investigating this field. The situation has improved, as evidenced by the gradual enhancement of scientific and medical psychological systems and the establishment of social psychological services.

It must be acknowledged that academic education is becoming more advanced, but it is possible that psychological education was not as comprehensive in the past as it is now.

Dear questioner,

The objective is to facilitate self-healing, document personal challenges, and identify solutions within the context of the current generation. This endeavor may prove to be a valuable opportunity.

You are an admirable individual.

It is recommended that you attempt to provide yourself with a greater degree of affection and care.

It is recommended that you begin to love yourself.

This complex intergenerational issue

It is possible to attempt to resolve the issue independently.

I extend my best wishes for your success and offer my encouragement.

III. Based on the circumstances presented, the following recommendations are offered for consideration. It should be noted that these suggestions are based on the personal views of the author and may have inherent limitations. Therefore, they are provided for informational purposes only.

(1) It is imperative to accept oneself and to be tolerant of oneself. It is crucial to understand that suppressing one's feelings is counterproductive and to learn how to effectively cope with them.

You indicated that you consider yourself to be an introvert. It is important to note that the concept of a "good" or "bad" personality is a subjective one. Every personality has its own strengths and weaknesses, and there is no single, universal solution to personality type. It is essential to recognize and appreciate your own personal attributes.

One is not loved merely because the other person is a good person; one is loved because one is worthy of love.

A sense of detachment from others and an inability to establish deep relationships may be indicative of underlying psychological issues pertaining to a lack of security. It is recommended that individuals in such circumstances consult with a qualified psychologist to gain insight into their emotional state. Psychotherapy conducted in a secure setting can facilitate a more comprehensive understanding of one's own psychological makeup.

The death of a loved one can be a significant shock to the psyche, and it is therefore of paramount importance to undertake a comprehensive psychological adjustment process during such a period. One effective method for achieving this is through the written expression of one's feelings.

(2) It is advisable to refrain from excessive catastrophizing about events that have not yet occurred. However, it is also important to establish a clear baseline.

In the event of observed behavior that is harmful to oneself, it is imperative to take decisive action to safeguard one's well-being. This is because the threshold between acceptable and unacceptable conduct in a domestic setting can often be very narrow.

In light of the aforementioned, it is imperative that we do not become complacent in the face of even a single instance of domestic violence. The fundamental objective is to extricate oneself from the situation as expeditiously as possible and to pursue legal counsel.

In the event that one's partner does not engage in domestic violence, yet one remains apprehensive, it is imperative to ascertain the underlying cause of this fear. It is plausible that one may have experienced similar trepidation within their familial history, leading to an apprehension that they may suffer a similar fate.

If we persist in catastrophizing about the future, we risk fostering a state of heightened anxiety. In instances where a partner may occasionally display rage, it may be beneficial to initiate communication, gently reminding the individual to regulate their emotions. Frequent difficulties in emotion regulation can have a detrimental impact on our well-being.

Such matters can be discussed with one's partner in order to facilitate mutual growth and understanding.

This is the extent of my commentary on the matter.

I would like to express my gratitude to those who have read this text.

I am a listening therapist at Yixinli.

Please do not hesitate to contact me should you require any further information.

If an individual exhibits negative emotions or behaviors, experiences physical or mental discomfort, frequently interacts with unhappy individuals or circumstances, engages in interpersonal conflicts, and encounters challenges in their personal or professional relationships, it is indicative of an imbalance in their magnetic field. This imbalance may also manifest in academic or professional endeavors. When an individual is excessively self-centered or pursues self-centered behaviors, a buildup of negative energy occurs. The more self-centered an individual is, the more their magnetic field deviates from alignment with others. Self-growth and change entail understanding and practicing genuine love for others, adapting to diverse individuals and circumstances, correcting the energy field, resolving conflicts, enhancing emotions and interpersonal relationships, and effectively addressing the aforementioned challenges.

To truly love others is to wish them happiness and to accept or forgive everyone, regardless of their abilities or shortcomings. If mistakes or shortcomings are identified, they can be corrected. Everyone has the right to happiness, regardless of the nature or quality of the relationship, whether it is perceived as positive or negative, and regardless of whether it is perceived as a gain or loss. It is human nature to hope for the happiness of others. People can provide each other with spiritual comfort and even joy. It is beneficial to love and accept others and oneself, to tolerate shortcomings and lack of ability, and to be kind at heart. In other words, it is beneficial to others or society to not despise or reject ordinary people, not to be jealous or intolerant of outstanding people.

If one does not get along with most people, it can result in the accumulation of negative energy and the emergence of negative emotional problems. In order to truly love others and adapt to people and things, it is necessary to correct one's energy field, thereby increasing the likelihood of finding and maintaining a loving and suitable relationship and career. Additionally, it is possible to share and exchange what one sees, hears, thinks, feels, or is interested in, including books, movies, music, and so forth, with others in real life and on the Internet, such as the Douban community.

Furthermore, it is important to cultivate a positive attitude towards one's romantic life and to appreciate the smaller, more mundane aspects of life.

Negative energy can affect one's physical health. Maintaining bodily comfort and health can provide a full-body massage. The head massage includes the forehead and face, which also have meridians. The head should be massaged with deep, firm strokes, and the stomach should be massaged with a firm massage brush. It is inadvisable to massage the stomach on an empty stomach and then engage in physical exertion.

Individuals who experience negative emotions, thoughts, or behaviors may perceive their physical and mental comfort to be compromised. They may also encounter unhappy people and circumstances, interpersonal conflicts, relationship and marriage issues (which can affect one's magnetic field), and even challenges in their academic or professional lives. This is because when an individual is excessively self-centered or driven by self-interest, they tend to accumulate a significant amount of negative energy. The more self-centered an individual is, the more their magnetic field may become misaligned with the energy fields of others. To achieve a more harmonious and fulfilling life, it is essential to learn how to truly love others and adapt to their needs, correct one's energy field, resolve conflicts, enhance one's emotions and interpersonal relationships, and effectively address the aforementioned challenges. Additionally, when an individual learns to truly love the people and things in their life, they may experience a reduction in negative emotions such as separation anxiety and pain, and an increase in feelings of happiness and fulfillment.

If necessary, they can also facilitate growth and change in those around them.

The manifestations of excessive self-centeredness vary from person to person. They include the psychological motivations to pursue self-satisfaction, to compete for self-esteem, to suppress self-deprecation and ingratiate oneself, to blindly give in order to gain, to fear losing, and to not care about the gains and losses of self-interest and emotions. Other manifestations include being too narcissistic or inferior, paying too much attention to oneself, generating stress and worry, social phobia, being caught up in one's own emotions and thoughts, attaching too much importance to what others think of oneself, not accepting one's own shortcomings and deficiencies, demanding one's own perfection, forcing, controlling, possessing others, or forcing others to satisfy oneself. Other manifestations include otherwise resenting and being discontent, being unable to let go of oneself to forgive and forgive, and brooding.

Those who prioritize self-interest may experience anxiety, depression, and fatigue, potentially leading to difficulties in adapting to the social and environmental dynamics of academic and professional settings. Conversely, individuals who prioritize the well-being of others and adapt to these environments may naturally displace self-preoccupation, thereby fostering positive energy.

In conclusion, it is imperative to act in a manner that is beneficial to oneself and others, and to refrain from actions that could cause harm or distress to others, as nobody desires to experience suffering.

Hello, I'm a heart exploration coach. Life is a beautiful journey, not just for appreciation, but for growth.

I can see you're sad. Your aunt's sudden death has hit you hard, and it's made you think about the fate of your family. You're thinking about your father, your two aunts, and even yourself.

From what you've written, it seems like your family is controlled by some kind of invisible force, as evidenced by the unfortunate fates of your father, siblings, and other family members. What really happened? Let's take a look.

1. Life is like a circle.

You feel that your aunt has a "persecution complex," and your father is always worried about his safety and health. Your sister-in-law is more rebellious, smart, and beautiful, but she's married to a reformed criminal.

Their behavior, thought patterns, and marital status are all different from the norm, just as your father is described as being very much like a psychopath.

This family also seems to be in a state of illness. As we mentioned at the start, being controlled by an invisible "force" is a pattern that runs in this family.

Everyone has their own patterns when it comes to thinking, emotions, and behavior. These patterns also affect our relationships with others.

My sister-in-law's suspicious nature shows up in her marriage, in her interactions with others, and when she reflects on her school days and work.

Then there's the younger sister, who's always been a bit of a rebel. She interacts with her partner in the same way she does with her parents, and it'll probably be the same with her kids.

These patterns are formed first and foremost through the family of origin and the parents, and are passed down from generation to generation.

What was your father and your two aunts' upbringing like? How did their parents interact and get along?

All of this will affect how they grow and what path they take in life. You, too, are influenced by your parents, so you're part of this intergenerational inheritance.

2. How to break the pattern

You've already started thinking about it, summarizing and reviewing the life experiences of your parents, and looking for ways to break the family "curse." This thinking ability comes first from your awareness.

When we're aware, we can see that these patterns exist and that they benefit everyone. They're maintained and solidified because they protect us to a certain extent.

For instance, your sister-in-law's tendency to be suspicious can give her a greater sense of security and make her feel free from the pressure of responsibility.

We'd say that the first person to leave the family is often the one who can change the family's fate. You might be that person, breaking this pattern: an unhappy marriage and a difficult life.

If you can, find out about your father and aunt's upbringing and learn about your grandparents' life stories. You might be able to find out more of the truth you're looking for, which could help you change the current situation and your own life.

We suggest you try "living with awareness" and "transcending the original family." The deceased has gone, but they've simply changed location and will still maintain a connection with their loved ones.

She just left suddenly, without saying goodbye. Turn this longing and regret into the strength to live a better life. If your aunt were still here, what would she say to you, and what kind of life would she want you to lead?

I don't know exactly what will happen, but I'm sure my aunt wants you to be safe and happy. So, live in the moment and enjoy what's in front of you.

I hope this is helpful to you, and I want to let you know that I love you.

If you'd like to keep the conversation going, you can follow my personal homepage, "Heart Exploration Service."

Hello, I'm Evan, a counselor at the Jingliu School, and I'm thrilled to be here!

From the description of the questioner, I can feel the negative emotions of confusion, worry, and pain. I am so sorry to hear about the misfortunes and difficulties your family has experienced, as well as the challenges you personally faced during your growth process. But I am also excited to hear about the amazing ways you have grown and thrived despite them!

The family environment has a profound impact on everyone's growth and character development. From what the questioner has described, it seems that the family situation has influenced his choice of spouse, which is a great opportunity for him to learn and grow!

Regarding the death of the questioner's aunt, her passing away was indeed shocking and saddening. But her talent and kindness are something to celebrate, and the hardship and suffering she experienced are even more heartbreaking.

I totally get where you're coming from! When someone close to you dies, it's a rollercoaster of emotions.

The life experiences of the questioner's aunt were indeed very difficult. She experienced an unhappy marriage and raised her daughter alone. But after retirement, her life improved! Unfortunately, she died suddenly, leaving the questioner feeling sorry and sad. Her paranoid delusions may have stemmed from past traumas and unfortunate experiences, but this state of mind didn't affect her life and health for long!

We may not be able to change the past, but we can absolutely work hard to create a healthier and more positive future for ourselves!

Regarding the behavior of the questioner's father, his personality and behavior have indeed caused great distress to the family. His behavior is indeed a bit paranoid, which may be related to his past experiences.

His excessive focus on safety and health in life may be due to his fear of loss and his fear of facing danger. And although his behavior makes the questioner feel troubled, it is also a way for him to express his concern, which is great!

His stubbornness and excessive worry may stem from his over-concern for safety and health, but such behavior has led to some exciting challenges in family relationships!

The questioner mentioned that his communication style is also disturbing. This may be the way he expresses problems and deals with emotions, but it does not mean that his views and actions are correct. In this case, effective communication with family members is particularly important. The good news is that there are ways to improve the family atmosphere! One way is to try to express the questioner's thoughts and feelings in a calm manner.

The questioner's younger aunt's marriage has also been full of twists and misfortunes. Her rebelliousness and choices may stem from her different understanding and pursuit of life, but it has also caused her to suffer more setbacks and harm in her marriage and family. However, this has also led her to embark on an exciting journey of self-discovery and growth!

The OP's sister-in-law's married life may be unfortunate, but she has always tried to find her own happiness, which is really admirable! Her daughter's rebellion is also part of the growth process, but in my opinion, it is more of a continuation of her own biological family, which is great because it means she can learn from her mistakes and become a better person!

I really hope they can reconcile soon!

The questioner's introverted nature is not a disadvantage. There's no need to change your personality! Everyone has their own unique traits. The questioner is relatively indifferent to people and things around them, perhaps because they're afraid of being hurt.

But please believe that sincere care and love can warm the heart! The husband of the questioner is good to you, which is worth cherishing!

Building deep relationships is an amazing journey that takes time and effort. You can try to build closer connections with family and friends by sharing each other's lives and feelings. Finally, regarding concerns about domestic violence, you can have an honest conversation with your husband, expressing your concerns and expectations, while seeking professional help and support to ensure your safety and well-being.

You can absolutely work together to overcome this problem, support each other, and grow together!

In this family, everyone has their own stories and pain. It's so important to try to understand them and care for them, while also paying attention to your own heart.

I'm sure you can face this difficult time with strength and bring strength to your loved ones! If the questioner feels a lot of pressure, they can seek help from a professional counselor, who will provide them with more support and advice.

And finally, I'd like to say that family is the cradle of our growth and the emotional home. It's so important to recognize that children who grow up in this original family will often repeat the interpersonal relationships they learned from this family in their own way. This may be the family relationship that the questioner's aunts are experiencing, and it's something the questioner can absolutely overcome! In my opinion, if you want to break through the influence brought by your original family or get out of a certain pattern caused by your original family, it is very important to constantly improve yourself and be self-aware.

It's so great that the questioner has recognized the issues and taken the initiative to ask their own questions on the platform. This is an excellent first step towards leaving the original family!

On a positive note, despite the challenges the author's loved ones have faced, the author has shown resilience and has the power to create happiness and beauty in their own lives.

With a little effort, support, and self-care, the questioner can gradually step out of the shadows of the past and embrace a brighter future. I'm excited to share my answer in the hope it helps the questioner.

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Hello! I'm Bao Bao, a psychological counselor. I've read about your family and I have so much respect for you all. ?

You know, your father, your aunt, your cousin, and you are all really brave people who have fought against fate.

You're not lacking in ability to face life, my friend. What you need is a little guidance on how to change those poor coping patterns.

It's so common for couples to have problems, and it's really tough when each person in the relationship feels insecure and worthless.

In a family, the mother's job is to make her child feel safe and secure. All a mother has to do to give her child this sense of security is to be emotionally stable, kind, and calm.

A father's job is to make his child feel like they're worth something. If a father knows how to give his child a big old pat on the back, tell them they're great, and show them he thinks they're awesome, he can help them see the world in a positive way, feel good about themselves, and have the confidence to take on the world!

It's true that not every family is perfect, and we all face challenges in our lives. But you know what? We can't change other people, but we can change ourselves. And when we do, we'll be better able to nourish our families and help them grow and learn.

If you're looking for specific ways to do this, how to give yourself a sense of security and worth, and how to establish a solid intimate relationship, you can draw on the many examples in "Psychological Nutrition in Practice." The most important thing is to establish the belief in yourself, persevere slowly, and change will happen.

Please don't hesitate to discuss this further if you'd like, and if you think it would help, you can always make an appointment for a consultation. I really hope things work out for you and your family.

Hello,

Your aunt's death came as a shock and was very upsetting. It was sudden and unexpected.

On top of that, when I think about my aunt's life story and family background, I'm concerned that something unfortunate might happen to me.

From what you've told me, it seems like a lot of your relatives have problems forming close relationships.

Your aunt married a bad guy. After the divorce, she thought she could pursue her own relationships, but she was rejected and was very hurt. She feels very insecure in the world and feels like someone is always out to get her.

As a matter of fact, your father is really worried about his safety and health, and he's also anxious because he doesn't feel secure.

Your aunt's romantic experiences haven't been very successful either.

They're both anxious because they don't feel secure and they crave love.

This might be linked to how they were attached as children.

They craved the attention of their caregivers but felt overlooked. They tend to be clingy and require constant reassurance that they are loved, but they also have a tendency to be suspicious.

This can make people in intimate relationships impatient, and some even resort to domestic violence.

It's important to understand that seeing is the first step to healing. You can also observe how you behave with your husband, what emotions you experience, and what your typical behaviour patterns are.

Do you intentionally bait your husband to see how he'll react?

It's not always the husband's fault. Sometimes, the relationship itself forces him to act this way.

Give yourself a bit more security, take some time to nurture yourself, and believe that you are lovable, worthy of love, and capable of loving.

The more you love, support, and tolerate your husband, the more calm he'll be.

I wish you the best of luck in breaking the family curse and having a happy life.