They say that modesty is a virtue, and we are encouraged to be modest. But is modesty really necessary?

Dear Question Asker,

The questioner alludes to the topic of modesty, which prompts the consideration of a common adage: excessive modesty is tantamount to pride. The questioner evinces a profound comprehension of self-realization. In the absence of modesty as a fundamental aspect of the questioner's identity and in the presence of a tendency to suppress one's emotions in an effort to align with the expectations of others, the result is a further distancing from one's authentic self.

However, the voice of the questioner feels somewhat uncertain and weak, overestimating the power of such moral demands and perceiving the voice of one's own psychological needs as being particularly weak. People only enter defense mode instantly when they are in danger, and only when they feel threatened do they become hostile. One might consider the example of an angry kitten, which displays a similar behavior pattern.

The kitten arches its back, raises its fur, and makes threatening sounds in its throat. However, what if the mouse is the actual threat?

It is unlikely that one would consider a mouse to be a threat. It would be beneficial to attempt to clarify that one is stronger than external moral demands and has the right to prioritize satisfying one's own psychological needs. This should result in a reduction of hostility and resistance.

The process of growth is gradual.

While modesty is undoubtedly a virtue, honesty is the foundation of all virtues. Only by being honest with oneself can one be honest with others and with oneself. Human development and growth is a gradual process, analogous to the growth of a sunflower. After the disk has just grown, it needs to lift its head every day and bask in the sunshine and rain to gradually mature. When the petals fade and the fruit gradually fills up, the sunflower will naturally lower its head. Such a growth process cannot be achieved overnight.

Consider the sunflower, which requires the nourishment of sunlight and rain but appears humble by lowering its head. Can the fruit still obtain the nutrients necessary for successful photosynthesis? Similarly, your current state can be likened to a sunflower that has just sprouted a flower disk. You require external affirmation, praise, and attention. This sunshine nourishes your heart and gradually forms a stable sense of self. You are aware that your pursuit of excellence is driven by your commitment to yourself, rather than by the pursuit of fame and praise. At that time, when you are fruitful, you will naturally lower your heavy fruit plate, surrender, and be humble. Everything will come naturally.

What are the underlying causes of unmet psychological needs?

Every emotion is the result of an unmet psychological need. The questioner is aware that his psychological need is to seek attention, praise, and acceptance, and he is sensitive to criticism. In the book "Helping Skills," it is stated that psychologist Rogers believes that the organism evaluation process is an internal guide that everyone is born with, which guides people towards self-realization.

When individuals place their trust in this inner guidance system, they are free to engage in experiences that are beneficial to their overall well-being.

In addition to undergoing an organism evaluation process, children also require unconditional positive attention and acceptance, as well as respect. They also require warm and unconditional love.

Having read this far, I am curious whether the questioner has any thoughts on the matter. Does it bring to mind any experiences or situations from your childhood?

Rogers introduced the concept of "value conditions," which refers to a situation in which parents communicate to their children through words or actions that they can only be loved and accepted if they meet the standards imposed by their parents. In such a context, children may begin to believe that they must act in a certain way to gain their parents' love. It is evident that the questioner is a perceptive individual who does not adhere to value conditions. This is a noteworthy attribute.

A child with an excess of value conditions is unable to be open to their own experiences, accept their own feelings, live in the present, make decisions freely, have trust, and simultaneously experience feelings of hostility and affection, and be creative.

The age of the questioner and the nature of their relationship with their family are unknown to me. However, it is evident that the emotional neglect experienced by the questioner has been significant, and that their psychological needs have not been met in a timely manner during their growth process. It is therefore recommended that the questioner reads the book The Neglected Child: How to Overcome the Harm Caused by Childhood Emotional Neglect as a means of initiating the process of self-exploration. This will enable the questioner to understand that it is reasonable and legitimate to have psychological needs, and to explore whether their psychological needs are within a reasonable range, and why they have these psychological needs. Should these needs remain unmet, it is essential to consider how they can be satisfied independently.

I am a psychological counselor, Zhang Huili. It is my hope that my response will prove beneficial to you. I hope that you will mature and develop confidence in a natural and effortless manner, eventually attaining a state of humility that is intrinsic and effortless.

Hello!

The wonderful thing about modesty is that it's influenced by the cultural atmosphere.

Our culture absolutely loves modesty! Foreign cultures also appreciate it, but to a lesser extent.

The great news is that modesty is not necessarily a matter of cultural differences!

Modesty is all about having an open mind and not exaggerating your abilities or value. It's about not being boastful or conceited, and not being reckless or stubborn.

And it also refers to the habit of actively seeking advice from others before making a decision or taking action with confidence!

In ancient China, most people lived in villages, and even the imperial court was made up of family, friends, and relatives!

Over time,

There were definitely many people like you who were eager to show off, express their own excellence, and be recognized and praised by others!

But when people get together, it's a whole other story! Everyone knows each other very well, and they know what you've been through and what the situation is at home.

Even the work was mostly done in the neighborhood, which meant they didn't have to live in a community and learn about others.

What does that lack of modesty usually lead to, compared to the amazing benefits of modesty?

Striving for performance in everything, always trying to be the first in everything, to get rewards and praise—it's a great way to live!

Let's be honest, unless your ability is truly exceptional and you're light-years ahead of everyone else, you're not going to be able to coast through life without facing some challenges.

Otherwise, it is easy to arouse envy and jealousy, and it cannot be ruled out that others will trip you up, isolate you, or even slander you behind your back. But that just means you have the opportunity to rise above it all and prove them wrong!

And if you are on the same level as others, there's still the exciting possibility that luck might be involved when you get something!

Absolutely! There are so many amazing people out there!

The great thing about modesty is that it gives you the freedom to hide your light under a bushel. This means that no one discovers your strength and bargaining chips until you're ready to show them who you are. And when you do, it's like fireworks!

Now, let me tell you something really interesting. I'm talking about how foreign cultures are held in high regard because of their long history of resilience in the face of adversity.

If you want to break free from the status quo, then you absolutely have to stand out, seize resources, and excel! That's how you'll survive and thrive!

But here's the great thing: when they develop well, they'll advance or retreat, in line with their strengths, to keep going strong for a long time!

Otherwise, it's anyone's guess! Once it's clear, if it lasts, it's the person who gets shot first.

The theory of attribution is fascinating! It suggests that we tend to believe our successes are due to our own abilities and that our failures are due to external factors and bad luck.

So, you can have your own strength factor, but no luck at all? Or, do you also feel that every time you fail, it is just bad external luck, not your own lack of ability?

If you are overly biased towards meritocracy, then you might want to check your own thinking to make sure it's not biased too!

The great news is that criticism is always there, but it is becoming less and less, so that praise seems to have meaning!

If there is no criticism at all, it's because they're saving it all up for you! They're keeping it to themselves and hoping you'll collapse sooner rather than later because they disapprove of your lack of modesty.

Or, is it possible that as soon as they praise you, you will be eager to help with everything and agree to everything they ask? For example, you might say that you are a good and hardworking person. Then, they'll be able to relax and not have to do the work!

I'd love to know if you think the other person is using praise as a way to deceive you!

So, from my personal point of view, I really hope the questioner can objectively consider this.

But what can you get from this praise?

If you need to show off to get something, such as an interview or a competition, then show off and stand out!

Because that is what you want! At times like these, even if others want you to be humble, you should absolutely not hide your own strength. Otherwise, you'll miss out on what you've earned and what you desire!

The rest of the time is yours to shine! Show off and win everyone's praise if you want to. Then, when you have the chance, treat each other as an audience when you feel that others also need to be praised just like you.

It's so important to give each other praise! And you also need to learn to recognize others, so that others can also sincerely recognize you in areas where they do not conflict with you.

I've heard this amazing story about a rich man and a beggar!

The rich man passed by and gave a beggar a coin. The beggar didn't respond. The rich man asked, "Why aren't you thanking me?" The beggar said, "You're so kind! You gave me a coin, which is such a small amount, and it's just one of many things you have. It doesn't affect you at all. You were only doing me a favor, so why do I need to thank you?"

The rich man thought for a moment and said, "Then I'll give you half my wealth!"

The beggar said, "Since it's half, we are the same, which means we are equals, so why do I need to thank you in particular?"

The rich man finally decided to give the beggar all his possessions, but still, the beggar didn't thank him! He asked why.

A beggar said, "If you gave me everything, then I would be the one who is rich, so why would I need to say thank you?"

A compliment is so simple! Compliments from me, no matter how sincere they are, are also compliments.

But to you, I am just a passerby. If this compliment is just made up, and you are happy and satisfied and feel happy,

And the best part is, it doesn't really matter if it's humble or not!

The absolute best kind of praise is the kind that comes from the heart. When someone genuinely and sincerely gives you praise, it makes you feel incredible!

I really hope this is helpful!

Hello.

It is normal to crave the approval and affirmation of others. This can gain external affirmation, verify one's abilities, and enhance one's sense of self-worth.

Modesty is not in conflict with your needs. It is a quality that respects others. It is about recognizing and valuing the abilities of others and the willingness to learn from them. This does not mean that you have to suppress your talents or desire to express yourself.

I believe the reason this issue is troubling you is because you feel that if you remain humble, you will have to give up the opportunity to gain self-affirmation and you will "lose" part of yourself.

From this perspective, I believe it is more important to focus on the benefits of humility rather than on the question of whether or not one can be humble.

(1) Humility is a response that has no impact on how others see us. In fact, if you observe, humility is typically a response when we praise ourselves to others, so before displaying humility, the outside world already has a positive view of us.

In this case, being humble is just an attitude, and it doesn't directly make the other person think that success has nothing to do with them. Imagine someone you admire a lot. When this person says that their success is all down to luck, it's clear that this person is not completely incapable.

(2) Humility is a positive signal for outsiders to establish relationships. Outsiders evaluate our abilities based on our results, while humility is an attitude.

For outsiders, attitude is more useful in determining whether we are easy to get along with than whether we are capable. There's no doubt about it: maintaining a humble attitude means that we are more likely to listen to the opinions of others, respect others more, be more approachable and cooperative. Outsiders are more likely to benefit from establishing a positive relationship with us.

This is not at odds with seeking approval and praise from others.

(3) For the individual, modesty means more about helping to improve one's ability to deal with criticism and negative feedback. You don't have to take your success and abilities completely out of the equation just because you're being modest. Being modest helps us objectively view our shortcomings, see criticism and negative feedback as opportunities for personal growth, and take action to improve ourselves rather than resist them as personal attacks.

Modesty does not mean repressing yourself and denying yourself. You can express yourself and share your talents and abilities with others while remaining humble.

It's simple. Just make sure your words and actions don't belittle others and speak to them respectfully and kindly. This way, you're not denying yourself and you're not showing off to make yourself look more confident.

Greetings.

A pat on the shoulder is a traditional Chinese gesture of modesty. Coupled with the fact that China is a country that values etiquette, there is more scope for interpretation of our words and deeds. In interpersonal relationships, if we know how to show respect to the other person and give them a gentle and comfortable feeling, we will be able to win their respect and appreciation.

Despite the common assertion that humility is a virtue, I am not inclined to embrace this quality. Indeed, I am not humble.

I am particularly susceptible to criticism and also highly receptive to praise. I experience a profound sense of joy, elation, and contentment when I am praised.

Furthermore, I aspire to express myself in public. I am disinclined to emulate those who are modest and claim that their success is merely fortuitous.

The question thus arises as to the feasibility of this proposition.

The questioner's understanding of the description, namely that "modesty" is merely a facade of hypocrisy, and that it is incongruous and not reflective of reality, is somewhat myopic. As with any noble quality, it is not merely about pleasing others or satisfying one's own self-serving desires. When an individual possesses the capacity to be recognized by others or even a greater capacity, they are obliged to examine themselves more rigorously and to self-regulate in order to prevent themselves from becoming arrogant and condescending. Instead, they must strive to maintain motivation and remain aware of their own shortcomings.

However, maintaining a humble attitude does not entail the denial of one's feelings or the revocation of the right to express one's inner feelings. When one achieves outstanding results, performs good deeds, helps others, and experiences happiness, the aspiration is to share these experiences with a larger audience in order to gain recognition and visibility. This is also a typical human need and emotion. One can express one's inner feelings sincerely, but this does not constitute a basis for arrogance. After all, it is through these actions that one achieves outstanding results and helps others. Ultimately, it is oneself who benefits from such growth and advancement, and this is not a matter that concerns others.

Accordingly, maintaining a low profile and an attitude of humility necessitates self-awareness. Analogous to the organs in the human body, we possess two ears and one mouth. One ear is tasked with perceiving external stimuli, while the other is dedicated to attuning to the voice of our inner wisdom. However, we must exercise restraint in our verbal expression. This practice prevents the ego from becoming overly expansive and losing touch with its true self. Additionally, it is essential to learn to observe our emotions without deliberately suppressing certain feelings. When faced with confusion, we can express ourselves, thereby facilitating a more comprehensive understanding of the confusion and becoming a more balanced, disciplined, and abundant individual.

I wish you the best of luck and encourage you to persevere in your endeavors.

Hello, question owner.

[1] A person can be unmodest. Everyone has a different definition of modesty. But excessive modesty is also conceited. Not being good enough on your own is not an act of modesty.

It's not true that we have to be humble from an early age.

People change as they grow up. You were taught to be humble as a child. We believe that being humble is right. But is it? Is being humble always the right thing to do?

Once you're in the workforce, you need to show what you can do. You don't need to be modest. You need to grab opportunities and don't regret missing out.

[3] Some people are humble to protect themselves.

If we don't show off, we're protecting ourselves. We think we need to be humble to avoid being destroyed or framed. But being unhumble can also harm us. We need to choose whether to be humble or not.

[4] Know when to be humble.

In the workplace, we don't have to be humble. We should be brave and seek our own opportunities. We also need to think and be independent. We should see when it's okay to be humble and when it's not.

Modesty helps us see our true feelings.

If we're good at something, we can express our feelings without repressing them. This will improve our motivation and confidence.

I hope these ideas help you.

I believe the questioner has a good point.

My name is Kelly Shui, and I'm from Xin Tan.

With regard to your observation about the advantages of modesty and the encouragement it offers us to be humble, I wonder if modesty is truly essential.

I would like to suggest that modesty is a virtue, but we can also approach things with a critical mind. Everything has two sides: there is good and bad, there is suffering and joy, and it always exists dialectically.

Perhaps we can allow for its diversity, not be bound to the positive side, and accept it gladly as human beings.

Many of us accept modesty as a virtue, just as many people are taught from an early age not to be proud.

I'd like to share an example that might help illustrate this point. I have a friend who, through his own hard work day and night, was admitted to graduate school. However, he would often say that I was lucky and fail to acknowledge the effort he had put in.

It could be said that this was also due to the parents' education, which had always involved a certain degree of suppression and criticism, and which had discouraged them from expressing pride.

I would like to share another example. When I was studying family therapy, my teacher told us about a case. There was a girl who had always been a top student, participated in many competitions, and won many awards. She had a strict father who had always encouraged her to work hard and be excellent. Her grades were consistently high, and she had won many awards, but she never received the same level of encouragement or appreciation from her father.

Subsequently, she was accepted into university, but subsequently developed depression. As you mentioned, there is a common perception that modesty is beneficial and encourages us to be modest. However, I personally do not feel the need to be modest, and I do not consider myself to be modest.

If, as previously discussed, our families primarily instill humility in us, but do not also encourage us to recognize and value our own efforts and resilience, we may become insecure and prone to self-doubt.

If someone who has consistently demonstrated excellence in their academic pursuits transitions to the workforce without having cultivated an appreciation for their own abilities, they may find themselves at a disadvantage if they are not at the top of their class or if they do not possess certain skills that set them apart from their colleagues.

[Self-acceptance]

Our culture teaches us to be humble and to be a good person. However, what exactly is humility? One definition is, "Know what you know, and what you don't know, you don't know." Humility is a traditional Chinese virtue, probably derived from Confucius's words.

The interpretation of this is a topic of debate among scholars, but the general public tends to view it as a matter of not claiming knowledge one does not possess and of maintaining humility when offering guidance to others.

In Western cultures, such as the United States,

It is also worth noting that encouraging everyone to express themselves freely is something we often see Chinese children being afraid to do. This may be a one-sided understanding of the "modesty" culture.

It would seem that they are only aware of one side of the story and are perhaps not fully aware of the other.

I have also observed this phenomenon in the workplace. Even in roles that may not be of significant importance, many foreigners tend to exude confidence.

However, when it comes to communicating with colleagues, we Chinese are always mindful of saying the wrong thing and are always careful to be humble.

In traditional Chinese culture, modesty is highly valued, and knowledge is either absolute or non-existent. It is considered best practice to reserve judgement until you have gained sufficient knowledge on a subject.

(For example, some parents may believe that modesty leads to progress, but may not fully understand what modesty is.)

I believe that one of the most effective ways for an individual to grow is to engage in activities that allow them to explore the world through their own independent thinking. By doing so, they can gain a deeper understanding of the world around them and uncover a multitude of possibilities.

Perhaps it would be beneficial to gradually let go of your attachments.

It's important to recognize that every situation has two sides. Allowing for the existence of multiple possibilities is essential for navigating the real world.

Similarly, I am open and accepting of my sensitivity to criticism and eagerness for praise from others, as the original poster has expressed.

I would be grateful for any praise I receive.

Such a reaction is understandable. For instance, if I achieve 100% in an exam and receive praise, I would be pleased. Similarly, if I wear a beautiful dress and am complimented on it, I would also be gratified.

If I were to say that I got a good grade and someone praised me,

I believe I was fortunate in that regard. Would the other person feel that I am being hypocritical?

If someone were to say that I am pretty, I would be grateful for the compliment and accept it with a smile.

Or, perhaps I'm not as attractive as I'd like to think.

I must admit, I do like to show off a little.

If you truly wish to showcase yourself in public, a psychologist once suggested that self-expression is a fundamental aspect of human nature, akin to how birds display their beautiful feathers.

If you avoid over-exhibiting yourself, you can help ensure that your enthusiasm is not perceived as hypocritical or contrived.

Such behavior may inadvertently lead to feelings of disgust.

It is important to note that there is nothing wrong with us genuinely wanting to showcase our abilities and talents. However, it is crucial to avoid any form of deliberate showmanship.

The renowned relationship expert Carnegie once observed that attempting to solely showcase oneself to others may limit the number of genuine and authentic friendships one can cultivate.

It would be beneficial to strive to be a sincere person, a genuine individual, and someone who is comfortable with themselves.

If it might be of interest, you may also wish to read "The Courage to Be Disliked."

We have the opportunity to grow together.

I would like to take this opportunity to wish you a very happy birthday.

Hello, I'm Gu Yi. I'm modest and humble.

Everyone feels pleasure and courtesy differently.

The Chinese have always been polite. People on Chinese soil treat each other with courtesy. This is the most basic thing we learn in school.

It will be easy to understand your confusion, and the cause of your emotions is reasonable. As China and the West interact more, our culture is affected.

You don't want to be as humble and tactful as people in the past. You hope that you can be more direct and accept everyone's affirmation of you with courage and generosity. This is fine.

Find what you have in common and accept differences.

The Internet has made things more accessible, and our thinking has changed. This is normal.

How do we be the best version of ourselves in a changing world? How do we respond to others? This is also a problem. Just do it when you see the emotions you want.

Different cultures clash, creating beauty and conflict. To understand this, we must know ourselves, be true to ourselves, and embrace change.

Dear Questioner, I appreciate your decision to seek guidance. It is evident that you wish to express yourself in public to gain the approval of others. However, you are concerned that your performance may not meet the standards of humility you believe are necessary. You are uncertain about the best course of action.

Let us proceed together with this exploration.

First and foremost, each of us is the master of our own destiny. We have the power to decide what kind of person we want to be.

While our society encourages humility, it is also a pluralistic society. Pluralism allows for a variety of personalities, including humble, outgoing, inferiority-stricken, and confident individuals. As long as we adhere to the law and do not negatively impact society or others, we have the freedom to pursue our desired personal and professional paths.

We are the architects of our own future. We have the power to follow our hearts and pursue the path that aligns with our true aspirations, rather than succumbing to external pressures.

Secondly, accept yourself and care for your well-being.

Modesty is a commendable personal attribute, and all the other commendable personal attributes are worthy of respect, except modesty. In the title, you mentioned that you hope to receive praise from others and express yourself in public, which are also commendable personal attributes.

It is important to accept yourself, whether you are a humble, low-key person or a confident, outgoing individual. Accepting yourself, loving yourself from the heart, and paying attention to your inner feelings is the best way to care for yourself.

Finally, learn to respond to criticism in a constructive manner to enhance your professional development.

In your title, you indicated that you are highly sensitive to criticism and eager for praise. It is possible that you perceive criticism as a rejection of your abilities and experience negative emotional reactions to it.

However, if we view criticism from a different perspective and see it as a tool for self-reflection, we can gain a different kind of insight.

It is inevitable that we will receive criticism from external sources in our daily work and life. When we can maintain composure in the face of constructive criticism and use it to identify areas for improvement, it can serve as a driving force for personal and professional growth, ultimately leading to a more fulfilling life.

I hope this information is useful to you. Best regards,

Hello, question asker!

You have raised an absolutely thought-provoking question!

I love that you're thinking about this!

There is no standard answer to this question, which means there are endless possibilities!

And there are so many aspects that can be discussed!

I'd absolutely love to share my insights with you and explore them together!

1. The first step is to understand what true humility is.

We live in a society that values modesty, and it's a wonderful thing!

We live in a society that values modesty, and it's a wonderful thing!

It is considered a virtue, which is great!

This is our culture, and it's a great one!

Generally speaking, modest people are more popular—and for good reason!

For example, we may have heard the fantastic saying:

Modesty is the path to progress! Pride is the path to lagging behind.

And social development encourages us to be bold and express ourselves!

For example, when applying for a job, most of us will present our best side, and we should!

Is this contradictory? Absolutely not!

Psychologist Lewin defines modesty as "not thinking about yourself at all."

It means doing something without worrying about whether you'll be praised or criticized!

I'll be the first to admit that I find it very difficult to do so.

Humility is a quality that belongs to people with real strength!

For example, some people are indeed not outstanding in a certain area. When they say they are not good at something, that is not humility, but just being realistic—and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that!

When it comes to exploration and innovation, some professors say that Chinese middle school students have room to grow in comparison to their American counterparts.

Chinese middle school students have so much potential! They just need to find their voice and speak up in class. When they do, they'll realize they have so much to contribute.

This may all be related to the education we've received, which means there's so much room for growth!

Take, for instance, the virtue of humility and the value of placing one's trust in authority.

If we understand modesty more comprehensively, we'll know that

There's absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to show yourself off in public! There's also no need to "act like those humble people and say that you are not that good, that it is just luck." Some people might say that such people are not being truthful or sincere, but I say they're just being themselves!

There are so many different opinions on modesty!

The great news is that the more capable you are, the more humble you can be!

For example, if someone is needed to go on stage and sing to liven up the atmosphere, and you yourself sing very well and volunteer to sing, you will get praise from everyone! There is no need for you to be humble.

On the contrary, if we can't sing, for most people who listen to songs, it's not enjoyment, but a desire to perform. At this time, what you may get is unpopularity. But that's OK! It just means you have the chance to try something new and exciting.

2. Get to know yourself better and think about how you perceive criticism and praise.

"I'm very sensitive to criticism and I really want others to praise me." In fact, this is a common psychological need for many people, and it's a great one!

Who doesn't love being praised and recognized by others?

Or who likes to be criticized?

I'd love to know how old you are this year!

I truly believe that if you read more books, experience more things, and are willing to reflect on yourself, you will change for the better!

And you might be wondering, why do I say that?

That's why when we truly accept ourselves, we gain a whole new understanding of praise and criticism!

For example, I used to be just like you, very sensitive to criticism. I could not remember ten compliments, but I could remember one criticism for a long time and feel unhappy for a long time. But then I discovered something amazing!

It seems as if being criticized is a reflection of one's own shortcomings, and one feels rejected. But there's so much more to it than that!

Later, after studying psychology, I was thrilled to discover there's so much to learn!

For example, the exact same person, the exact same thing, viewed from different people's perspectives, some people will like it, some people will dislike it or even hate it. Isn't it fascinating how our perspectives can differ so much? If you think about it carefully, is there anything like this around you?

Isn't it great that no two people have the same opinion of the same person or thing?

We know that everyone wears their own glasses. And that's a good thing! In the eyes of some people, we are exceptional, while in the eyes of others, we may be ordinary. But that's okay! We can't all be extraordinary to everyone.

This is why external evaluations are actually unstable.

And the best part is, we get to approve of ourselves!

The great news is that other people's judgments won't affect your definition of yourself!

No matter what it is, whether it's praise or disparagement, we shouldn't take it to heart completely!

You are the only one who can decide your own value!

People who criticize us are not necessarily trying to deny us. A fair criticism points out something we've overlooked, and if we can calmly accept it, we can grow from it!

3. Be brave and be yourself, while also considering the surrounding situation.

You ask, "Can't I just be humble?"

I'm so excited to share with you all that…

I truly believe that modesty should be treated differently!

We have the amazing ability to behave differently in different situations and in front of different people!

For example, in front of friends, you can let your hair down and express yourself however you want!

We want to stand out in front of many people who are better than us, which may make us annoying, but it's also a great chance to learn and grow!

This is when we have a fantastic chance to learn with an open mind!

What we say and do is appropriate in one situation but not in another—and that's a great thing!

So, if you want to make yourself happier, I think the best thing you can do is express yourself while taking into account the feelings of others and considering the situation!

Absolutely! We can definitely look at the feedback that others give us.

Just share these!

If you're interested, you've got to check out "The Nature of Self"!

Wishing you the very best!