What is the psychology behind my husband wanting me to revolve around him, making him the center?

Good day, my name is Strawberry.

It is important to recognize that an individual's behavior is often driven by underlying needs and motivations. By understanding the other person's behavior, it is possible to gain insight into their thoughts and concerns. This understanding can help identify issues that may otherwise go unnoticed.

The influence of outdated concepts

The issue that the questioner is facing is that her husband desires for her to prioritize him and revolve her life around him. This dynamic suggests that the relationship aligns with a traditional model of husband and wife that originated in ancient times.

Historical and cultural evidence indicates that in ancient times, men held a dominant position within the family unit, while women were expected to adhere to the "three obedience and four virtues" and the adage "the absence of talent is a virtue." During this period, wives appeared to be largely subservient to their husbands.

Despite improvements in the influence of old concepts and the pursuit of gender equality in today's society, some individuals still adhere to traditional gender roles. In these cases, the wife's focus remains on the husband, and this mode of interaction is perceived as normal.

Fulfilling the inner longing and needs

Men who desire their wives to value themselves and prioritize them exclusively may have experienced rejection and denial of their needs at various stages of their personal development. This has potentially resulted in an inability to gain or rebel.

They mature at a slower pace, lacking in self-confidence and self-assurance, and gradually develop their own strength and abilities. It appears that they are maturing, but the inner child, burdened with regrets, is not maturing alongside them. The gap in their hearts is consistently seeking an opportunity to make up for it, and they find it through their partner.

The husband of the original poster is seeking recognition and affirmation from the original poster to gain confidence and a sense of security. However, it is not the original poster who is causing the husband to feel insecure and lacking in confidence. Therefore, despite his constant demands, the husband is still unable to find what he needs to fill the void in his heart.

It is important to understand your husband's psychology.

The individual who is able to establish a good rapport with her husband is the one who asks questions. It is only through questioning that she can gain a deeper understanding of her husband's thoughts and feelings. Given the limitations of text-based communication, it is not possible for anyone else to fully comprehend the nuances of her husband's inner world. Asking questions is an effective method for gaining insight into the situation and identifying suitable solutions.

☀️Maintain communication: Communication is essential to maintaining a stable relationship. However, it is not always possible to guess accurately about another person's thoughts and behaviors. It is important to recognize that only the individual in question is fully aware of their own thoughts and motivations. In this case, it seems that the questioner and her husband lack effective communication.

The questioner is seeking to understand the root cause of her husband's thoughts and behaviors. Direct communication can help clarify any confusion. She can inquire about the emotions her husband experiences when she is not centered around him and to what extent he desires her to be so.

Upon viewing the photograph, it is important to identify the specific understanding you are seeking.

Once the answer is obtained, it is not necessary for the questioner to adhere to her husband's suggestions. Instead, she should endeavor to comprehend her husband's requirements as outlined in the response and identify any potential shortcomings on her part that may have contributed to her husband's feelings of insecurity within the relationship, thereby prompting his demand for more.

It is important to seek professional assistance when dealing with the psychological impact of growing up. This is because, when a person is unable to find a way to let go that suits them and truly grow spiritually, the effect of the help and cooperation of others will be short-lived and temporary.

It is recommended that you seek professional assistance to guide the husband in recognizing his inner child, his true unmet needs, and in healing himself in a constructive manner. This will help him to gain a sense of security and increase his self-confidence.

Many conflicts between couples stem from a lack of understanding of how to manage intimacy, a failure to address and resolve issues in a timely and proactive manner, and an inability to solve problems. This can result in the accumulation of problems that negatively impact the relationship, or it can lead to hasty decisions to separate.

It is important to note that relationships are mutual. Ideally, a couple should be able to understand, tolerate, support, and grow together. The questioner's desire to understand her husband indicates her intention to improve their relationship. However, if he is not aware of the need for change, she may consider suggesting a course on intimacy to facilitate positive problem-solving in their relationship.

I hope my response is useful to the individual who posed the question. Best regards,