How to explain to my parents that I want to assess my mental condition?

Hello!

Host:

Hi, I'm Zeng Chen, a heart exploration coach. I've read the post and I totally get where the poster is coming from.

At the same time, I also noticed that the original poster has been really brave in facing their own inner feelings and actively seeking help on the platform. This could really help the original poster to better understand and know themselves, and thus adjust themselves.

I'd love to share my observations and thoughts from the post with you, because I think they might help you to view yourself from a more diverse perspective.

1. It's totally normal to look for things you can't get in real life in the virtual world.

It has been observed that the original poster mentioned that he likes chatting with friends online because he feels that they don't know my situation and can often play the role of a confidant. I feel that no one really cares about me, that no one values me, and that the world is unfair. I feel symptoms of world-weariness. What I feel from these comments is that the original poster seems to be because in reality their needs are not being met.

At this time, we'll turn to online dating. Of course, there's absolutely nothing wrong with it!

It's totally okay to just feel the feelings you get when making friends online and experience the "benefits" you get. Through such exploration, we can better understand and know ourselves. Find out what your real needs are, and then we can explore other ways to meet those needs.

2. Give yourself a break! It's okay to feel whatever you're feeling. Just try to express your emotions in a way that's respectful and reasonable.

In the post, the poster mentioned that sometimes when emotions run high, they often injure themselves, and sometimes they even want to jump off a building. Sometimes they always want to smash things or something else, and when they are confused, they want to hurt the little animals they usually like or my sister. It's so sad to see how much pain the poster is going through. It seems like their heart is suppressing a lot of emotions.

It's totally normal to want to escape when you're feeling bad. We've all been there! Sometimes, we might lash out or even harm ourselves temporarily to make ourselves feel better.

These are just some of the ways we know, but there are also some really lovely, more reasonable ways to express our emotions.

I think you'll find it really helpful to try this! For example, in psychological counseling, writing therapy is often used, which involves writing down one's feelings, thoughts, emotions, and naming one's emotions and the situations in which one feels them.

It can be really helpful to write these things down. When we write, we can express our emotions in a way that we might not be able to do otherwise.

On the other hand, if we can find a way to listen to and accept our emotions, they'll start to subside. And by writing about them, we can gain a deeper understanding of ourselves! I truly believe that when we learn to express our emotions in healthier ways, the host will be able to reduce some of the behaviors that are harming themselves.

3. Give your body a little love!

In the post, some physical symptoms mentioned by the poster were observed. If these symptoms rule out the possibility of an underlying medical issue, it could be that our emotions are expressed through our bodies.

It's totally normal to experience physical symptoms when we have strong emotions. For example, when we're feeling nervous, our body might start to feel a bit stiff.

Some folks have a racing heart and feel a bit uncomfortable in the chest when they're feeling anxious. So, when we notice emotions or physical discomfort, it can be really helpful to focus some of our attention on the uncomfortable area for a while.

You can also imagine what this part would want to express if it could. Explore yourself in this way.

This can help us feel better and also help us understand what we need. The original poster can try the book "The Body Knows the Answer" by the famous psychologist Wu Zhihong.

I really hope this helps you find the answer you're looking for!

4. Take a moment to reflect on your own personal journey of growth.

In the post, the original poster mentioned that she lacked confidence, had low self-esteem, social phobia, and was afraid of communicating with others, but she didn't know why. I totally get it!

It can also be really helpful to take a look at ourselves together. Often, our inferiority complex and fear of communicating with others may be related to our early upbringing.

When we're young, we live in a world shaped by our families, schools, and communities. As kids, we don't have the knowledge to understand ourselves yet. That's why we rely on the feedback of the people around us, like our caregivers, teachers, and others. When we get positive feedback, it can make us feel more confident.

If the feedback is negative, if people don't accept us or don't like us, it can be really tough to stay positive. It's totally normal to have self-doubts in these situations. The good news is that we can always try to review our own growth experiences to better understand and know ourselves.

On the other hand, I've noticed that the original poster said they're in high school. So, at this stage in their life, the psychological changes that come with adolescence might make them feel less confident. It's totally normal! During this time, many people want to be the best version of themselves, and it's natural to feel a bit self-conscious when there's a difference between the ideal and the real version of yourself.

So, the original poster can also look at themselves from this angle. It's always good to have a reference point, even if it's not a concrete example.

As for the evaluation you mentioned, I have observed that some teachers have given really detailed replies, so I won't repeat them here.

I really hope these comments are helpful and inspiring for you!

Hello, student!

I am Sunshine, and I am grateful to have met you here! Let's connect through a virtual hug, reassure each other with a pat on the shoulder, trust our inner feelings, and cheer together as we take this on!

Thank you for your self-awareness and for bringing up the topic of asking for help: "I want to assess my psychological condition, but I'm not sure how to explain it to my parents."

Carefully reading the question the questioner seeks to discuss will undoubtedly bring more possibilities for the answer you want.

I have also considered this topic and am happy to share my thoughts with the questioner.

Let's first sort out the specific situation described by the student and then interpret and analyze it.

As a high school student, I am aware that I lack confidence, have low self-esteem, social phobia, and am afraid of communicating with others. My body trembles from time to time for no reason, and sometimes when I get emotional, I self-harm. I am aware that I sometimes want to jump off a building. I often reject communication with others, but sometimes I am very talkative. I want to make friends who I can chat with, but I often push people away. I have no interest in studying.

As can be seen in this narrative, the student's actual psychological perception and feelings are accurate. I presume that the questioner has also learned about relevant information about their own psychological changes. Have you ever used psychological scales on the Internet to test your own psychological state?

How long have you been aware of and experiencing these feelings? These feelings are a clear sign that you need to pay attention to your physical and mental health.

This allows me to see the changes in my classmates' inner world, which is beneficial for them.

– When I get emotional, I often injure myself. Tell me how you do it and how you cope each time. What kind of people/events usually trigger self-injury?

Is wanting to jump off a building just an idea? Have these practical actions/ideas ever been mentioned to parents/someone at home by the student?

These self-harming behaviors clearly indicate that the questioner is unable to control their emotions and needs immediate medical attention.

Classmates have never had the opportunity to actively communicate with others. What is the way/pattern of interaction between parents and classmates like?

Or is it always just my own world?

The student describes themselves as lacking confidence, having low self-esteem, suffering from social phobia, being afraid of communicating with others, sometimes trembling for no reason, sometimes getting emotional, and often self-harming. This may also be related to the student's upbringing and the attachment patterns between them and their main caregivers (parents or family members). They often did not receive positive encouragement from their parents, or they received suppression, criticism, blame, or complaints. This has led to a self-deprecating and lack of self-confidence personality. Do they have less communication with their family?

This has led to the current social phobia and fear of communicating with others. The "unexplained trembling" of the body is a manifestation of the somatic symptoms of psychological anxiety and other reactions. It is the result of the interaction between mind and body, which shows that psychological problems have affected physical health.

I enjoy chatting with friends online. I feel that they don't know my situation, and they often play the role of a confidant. I also have an inexplicable sense of dependence on electronic products such as mobile phones and computers. The school doesn't allow mobile phones to be brought in, and I feel a sense of regret after being caught. I know it's wrong, but I'll do it again next time.

Yes, we all have an innate "social nature," especially when we are feeling negative emotions inside. We need someone to talk to, and that's what the app does. It's a good thing, and it deserves recognition.

Some students find it difficult to find suitable people to talk to in reality, so they use electronic devices (mobile phones, computers) to communicate and talk to strangers at a distance. This can relieve some of their "depressive moods," but it also seems to avoid facing their own inner selves. It may also be the result of long-term suppressed emotions.

I am certain that there is something wrong with my body. I experience angina pectoris, headaches, and stomach aches intermittently. I feel discomfort in every way, and I am torn between avoiding communication with others and craving it.

I feel that no one cares about me, that no one values me, and that the world is unfair. I am tired of this world.

The questioner's occasional angina pectoris, headaches, and stomachaches, along with the feeling of discomfort in every part of the body, are clear indications that the questioner needs to prioritize their physical and mental health. These symptoms are likely the result of the interaction between the mind and body.

Avoidance and longing for communication are internal conflicts that drain energy and motivation. If one has experienced neglect or abandonment from family members, this reinforces a sense of being disregarded or abandoned.

The reason for feeling unloved and unappreciated is not the fault of the questioner. It is directly related to your upbringing. However, perhaps the parents and family members themselves also had cognitive limitations and did not know how to raise their children, which resulted in the current situation of their classmates.

Yes, I sometimes want to smash things or hurt other people, especially little animals and my sister.

Prolonged emotional suppression is also a factor in such cases. We all have emotions, especially when we are not satisfied with our needs or angry. We need to express and vent these emotions outwardly. When this normal way of expressing emotions has no outlet, we transfer the inner "aggression/anger" to point at weak people or small animals. This can also be understood as a way to vent emotions.

In summary, psychological testing is relatively straightforward when it comes to the student's actual situation. However, if you want to explain it to the parents, you may need to prepare the student psychologically first. If you want to express your needs to your parents, I will share some of my thoughts with you here.

[1] It is crucial to accept all past experiences, including those with parents and the way you interact with them. It is important to recognize that parents may not fully understand their children's feelings and thoughts, and that they too have limitations in their understanding.

[2] You should take the initiative to communicate with the school's psychological teacher. Pour out your true thoughts and feelings to a professional psychological teacher. This initiative to break through requires classmates to muster the courage. The psychological teacher can do relevant psychological tests. Nowadays, general middle schools are generally equipped with full-time/part-time psychological teachers (school psychological counseling is usually free).

[3] Once the school psychologist has tested and assessed the student's psychological condition, they will provide guidance on how to communicate with parents. If necessary, the psychologist can also offer advice or contact parents directly.

[4] The student can also first use the excuse that they don't feel well, for example, with angina, a headache, or a stomachache, and ask their parents to take them to the hospital for medical treatment. After ruling out physical illness, if a professional doctor recommends seeing a psychologist, the student must "follow the doctor's advice." This is to deal with psychological problems by first dealing with physical "problems," and if necessary, "treat both the body and mind." This is a true expression of the student's physical needs to their parents, and is also the first step towards changing the student's life.

[5] The questioner has a lot of room for psychological growth. They need to work on their self-confidence, overcome their low self-esteem, cope with social fears, and stop depending on their mobile phones. These are all things that require gradual psychological adjustment. When you have the energy, read some books on psychology. I suggest "Beyond the Original Family," "Why Does Family Hurt," "Love Yourself Back," "When You Start Loving Yourself, the Whole World Will Love You Back," and "Meeting the Unknown Self."

The above is a response that combines the questioner's question. It is my hope that it will spark further discussion and bring about more thinking. I am certain that it will be enlightening and helpful to the questioner. I welcome more in-depth exchanges. I am confident that the questioner will soon adjust to the situation and enjoy their high school life!

You will be blessed!

I am sunshine, the world, and I love you! ?

It is of significant concern to read your detailed account and observe the presence of self-harm and extreme thoughts in your life. This is a highly alarming indicator, as self-harm and extreme thoughts have the potential to endanger your life and precipitate profound changes within your family.

In the event that one's extreme thoughts and misanthropic complex have resulted in significant difficulties in maintaining a normal daily routine, it is advisable to contact a crisis intervention hotline at the earliest opportunity. This will allow for a confidential discussion with a trusted teacher or friend, as well as the commencement of psychological counseling.

The objective of this assessment is to evaluate my current psychological state.

How might one explain an inferiority complex and social phobia in the context of high school?

The individual displays a fear of communication with others, as well as trembling and self-harm and attempted suicide.

Self-harm

Social phobia

Despite your current reluctance to engage in communication with others, it is important to recognize that as a human being, you also have a fundamental need to belong and to achieve a sense of coherence in your current state of mind. It is essential to understand the underlying reasons behind your inclination to engage in self-harm.

It is recommended that you cease self-harming behaviors and seek psychological counseling to alleviate your feelings of world-weariness.

Your experiences in high school were particularly noteworthy.

The manner in which these experiences are managed is also of great consequence.

It is not uncommon for our thoughts to result in disparate outcomes. One may desire companionship, yet simultaneously crave solitude. Concurrently, one may experience a sense of world-weariness, a reluctance to attend school, feelings of inferiority, and an inclination to rely on one's mobile device, while simultaneously violating established norms. Additionally, one may confront a range of physical ailments, including angina pectoris, headaches, and gastric distress, which may be intricately linked to one's emotional state.

Given the intimate connection between the physical state and the brain, fluctuations in our thoughts can significantly impact our emotional state. When there is an excess of these fluctuations, hormonal and nervous system responses can also influence our perception of pain, leading to a cascading effect throughout the body.

The individual may experience a sense of discomfort, potentially due to a lack of satisfaction with the current circumstances and a perceived discrepancy between self-image and reality. Avoidance of communication with others may also indicate a form of self-disapproval. It is therefore essential to identify the type of self-concept that fosters a sense of worthiness and confidence.

In the absence of external validation, it is crucial to avoid self-devaluation, self-harm, and self-attack. Respecting oneself is an essential aspect of this process. Only by recognizing one's intrinsic value can an individual foster respect from the external world. Given the inherent unfairness of the world, it is imperative to strive for personal growth and make informed decisions that promote a sense of relative fairness.

These are the lessons learned during adolescence and upon entering the adult world. It is therefore imperative not to inflict harm upon others. It is recommended that you contact the crisis intervention hotline when extreme thoughts arise, as well as undergo long-term psychological counseling to stabilize your mind. It is also advised that you inform your parents in a timely manner that you require assistance.

Please clarify.