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By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024
Hello, question asker. I'm Evan.
The question asker said he hates his father and men! Where do these views come from?
You said you were a child and envied men. Why did you feel disgust? Did you feel this way only after understanding your gender?
Why do family members prefer boys? Who taught them to discriminate against girls? When the questioner realizes that her family only likes boys and she is a girl, does she feel powerless or even develop an aversion to men?
The questioner is disgusted by men's dominance in today's society. They feel powerless and project their disgust onto others' approval of men. The questioner needs to perceive these feelings and work through them.
The original poster once envied men, but after coming to terms with her gender, she developed hatred for her father and an aversion to men. Is she also resentful of her gender?
Has the questioner thought about why men were valued in the past? Was it normal to value men in the original family?
Men often represent productivity and the ability of a family to survive.
In the past, men were the strongest and needed to work harder. So it makes sense that men are respected more. These ideas are still around in families and affect children. They are more common in the past.
These views put pressure on women and cause them harm. But times are changing. Machines are replacing men's roles, and women are taking on more roles than men. Girls are catching up to boys.
Give the author a hug, give the author strength, and I hope the author can be themselves. I will give the author simple advice based on the author's question:
Understand why the family treats the questioner this way.
Why are the parents treating the questioner this way? What happened to make them treat the questioner this way? How did the parents learn to treat their daughter?
This is common in China. How to treat children is taught by parents.
This is how they think parents should treat their children.
Why should you understand your family's views? Because you can calm down and relax.
The questioner will also accept that women are equal to men.
Talk to your parents.
The questioner can talk to their parents when they're in a good mood. They can tell them how they feel and what's going on in their life.
Tell them how you feel about their behavior. Find out what they think and why.
Parents often have different views on their children because of the values of previous generations. These can affect the questioner too. The questioner can talk to their parents to understand the situation better.
Get moving!
If you're dealing with family members, it's normal to feel negative emotions. The best way to combat this is to get active.
To cheer yourself up, get active and go outdoors. Exercise will speed up blood circulation, giving your brain plenty of oxygen and relieving tension. It will also make you feel happy.
Get professional psychological help.
If you have trouble accepting your family members' actions and don't know how to communicate with them, you can seek professional psychological support. Look for psychological counselors or listeners on psychological platforms. They can help you communicate with your parents more fluently.
The views of a certain era were correct at the time, but they are outdated now. You can also talk to a counselor or friend about your views.
Accept yourself.
Do more of the things you like. Find the meaning of your life in these things. Accept yourself. When you are in a low mood, please yourself.
Make yourself happy. Eat something sweet. It will make you feel good. But don't hurt anyone.
Don't let negativity take over.
I hope this helps.
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Comments
I can totally relate to feeling stuck between wanting to improve and finding it hard to start. It's tough when you're unsure about your path and feel like you're constantly comparing yourself to others, especially family members who seem to have clearer directions.
It sounds like there's a lot of pressure on you right now, not just from yourself but also from the expectations around you. Sometimes we need to take a step back and realize that our worth isn't tied to what we achieve or how quickly we do it.
Feeling powerless can be so overwhelming, especially when you've been conditioned by societal norms that don't value you as you are. Recognizing this is already a big step forward; it's important to acknowledge these feelings without letting them define you.
The desire to become a better person is commendable, but it's equally important to recognize that you're already valuable just as you are. Progress doesn't always mean pushing harder; sometimes it means being kinder to yourself and setting realistic goals.
It's challenging when the people closest to us become sources of stress rather than support. Maybe this is an opportunity to redefine what success means for you, separate from external pressures. Remember, it's okay to go at your own pace.