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By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024
Hello, question asker.
You know that some of your behavior is influenced by your father, and you are bothered by the fact that you display the same behavioral patterns as him.
You don't need to act like your father. You have your own career, your own mind, and your own rationality and calmness. These elements are enough to make you satisfied with your material life and gain a certain social status. However, you have been influenced by your surroundings since childhood, and this has led you to have the same attitude and behavior towards love as your father. You know that is not the attitude you should have, and now, this attitude and behavior are negatively impacting your personal psychology, career, and finances. You feel anxious, irritable, and resistant.
First, know this: your thoughts and actions are yours alone. You are not forced to act in any particular way, and you are wholly responsible for your actions.
Second, you know you're moving on from your father's influence. You're aware of your problems and you're fighting against them.
Your behavior can be understood as a lack of security and a love of motherhood. This aspect may come from your own inner needs. When approaching this from the perspective of needs, be careful about "moderation" and avoid "overcompensation." You need to be restrained and coordinated in your actions and awareness.
Finally, I will provide some suggestions.
1. Think of yourself as separate from your father. Take responsibility for your own actions and thoughts. Start from your own inner needs. This is the only way you will find your own path in life. You will no longer regard your father as an influence on your child.
2. Start with your ideas and concepts. Absorb the ideas and concepts of the current mainstream culture. Then, develop your own views on marriage, love, and values in a diversified way. This will help you improve and correct your concepts.
Best wishes!
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Comments
This is a complex issue that involves deeprooted behaviors and beliefs. I feel like I need to address the underlying reasons for why I've adopted my father's habits despite being financially independent. It's important to recognize how this pattern affects my life negatively and seek healthier ways to build relationships.
Understanding where these behaviors come from is one thing, but changing them is another challenge altogether. I think it's time to reflect on what I truly value in a relationship and work on establishing connections based on mutual respect and trust rather than physical intimacy alone.
I'm starting to see that my actions are not only hurting me but could also be harmful to others. It's crucial for me to break this cycle and find a more meaningful way to relate to women. Perhaps therapy or counseling can help me unpack these issues and develop better habits.
It's clear that my approach to relationships has been misguided. I should focus on personal growth and building a strong foundation for genuine partnerships. By doing so, I can create a more fulfilling and balanced life that doesn't revolve around unhealthy dependencies.
The realization that my behavior is selfdestructive is a wakeup call. I need to take steps to change my mindset and learn new ways of interacting with people. This might mean stepping out of my comfort zone and learning to appreciate the value of nonphysical aspects of relationships.