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By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024
Hello, question asker!
I am certain that many young people will behave differently when they are with the opposite sex.
You will also be particularly sensitive and nervous around the opposite sex.
I am happy to share what I know with you. I am confident that you will find it inspiring.
1. Understand the characteristics of our period.
Tell me, have you been in love before?
Tell me, have you been in love before?
It is a normal psychological reaction during adolescence to be sensitive or nervous when facing the opposite sex.
Everyone expresses it differently.
You will feel more sensitive.
On the one hand, you are "particularly interested in the opposite sex, will initiate conversations with the opposite sex, and will unconsciously add a lot of opposite-sex friends." In this situation, you will feel safe and comfortable.
When it comes to familiar people of the opposite sex, we know we don't know how to behave, especially when a friend of the opposite sex is with their boyfriend.
This basically means that we haven't figured out our relationships with the opposite and same sexes yet.
You get along well with your childhood friends and female classmates from university, but you don't know how to behave when they have boyfriends.
We may know how we should behave, but we still feel unnatural and constrained when facing the opposite sex in such situations.
Adolescence is a time when we are all curious about the opposite sex and want to get attention.
We act overly nervously because we don't know how to get along with the opposite sex. This is something we can work on.
Relax. This is just a phase. It's not a problem with you.
Relax. This is just a phase. It's not a problem with you.
At this stage, we are constantly exploring relationships with the same sex and the opposite sex. We are also exploring what boundaries we should maintain in order to feel safe and not arouse suspicion.
We must learn how to socialize, become friends with others, and view acquaintances and lovers in a balanced way.
When you start a relationship, the problems you have now will no longer bother you.
2. Find a method that works for you.
Take the initiative to strike up a conversation with the opposite sex on other occasions. Act as if you were a different person.
Have you tried developing a deeper relationship with the opposite sex?
You have to get in the water to swim.
You have to try to fall in love with yourself if you want to feel it. Don't let other people tell you otherwise.
If we are not in a relationship, we are unable to navigate all kinds of relationships.
Tell me, are you sensitive and nervous when you initiate conversation with the opposite sex?
Or are you only nervous or sensitive when it comes to people of the opposite sex you know well?
We must ask ourselves: are we afraid of being judged by the opposite sex?
Or are you nervous because you think they'll gossip and tell your family or someone you care about about your behavior?
Get in touch with the opposite sex more. Look at men and women intimately together with equanimity. It could be a buddy with his girlfriend or a childhood friend with her boyfriend.
Separate yourself from them. That way, they're just them, and you're not as nervous.
It's simple. It's like separating individual topics.
You must learn to deal with couples and the opposite sex in different situations. Find a way to make yourself comfortable and also make the other person comfortable.
Greet them with a smile.
If you're nervous, fake it.
It's like performing.
Keep trying until you see what happens.
As you said, "It was the first time I met her boyfriend, and normally I would have said hello and greeted him, but I unconsciously ignored his existence." Now that you're aware of it, next time something similar happens, just do what you want to do, instead of what you subconsciously want to do.
Your university likely has a psychology teacher. Talk to them. They can help you get through this period more smoothly.
Read some books on your own if you want to. I suggest "Intimate Relationships" and "Love Needs Learning."
Just share these.
Best wishes!
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Comments
I think I might be overthinking the interactions with people in couples. Maybe it's just a nervous reaction because I'm not sure how to act around boyfriends and girlfriends. I guess I need to work on being more relaxed and natural, like I am when I meet new people of the opposite sex.
It seems like I put too much pressure on myself in those situations. Perhaps I should remind myself that it's okay to acknowledge everyone present without feeling awkward. After all, it's not about me; it's about respecting their relationships and being polite.
Maybe I feel this way because I want to make a good impression. With my university classmate and her boyfriend, or my childhood friend, I was probably worried about intruding. But now I realize that it's better to be open and friendly, even if it's just a simple greeting.
I wonder if my behavior stems from insecurity. When I see friends with their partners, I feel out of place, as if I don't belong in that dynamic. But that's silly because I can still be part of the group and contribute positively without feeling constrained or nervous.
Reflecting on this, I think I have a fear of stepping into someone else's space unintentionally. It might help if I practiced more inclusive body language and greetings, so I don't come off as ignoring the partners. That could ease the tension and make these encounters smoother.