Why am I always compelled to overthink and worry about the worst-case scenarios?

Let the past go with the wind.

Your anxiety stems from your preoccupation with past mistakes. You're stuck in a loop of obsessing and regretting, fixating on the scar on your back. Even the doctor said you don't have an infection, but you're still holding on to it. The reason is that you haven't achieved your goal.

Worrying is a real burden.

I suggest you read the book or watch the movie of the same name: "The Secret." It talks about a law called the Law of Attraction, which means that what we think about in our minds will eventually become reality. However, the universe cannot distinguish between what you want and what you don't want. For example, if you worry about illness, the universe hears "illness," and that illness will be created by your thoughts and appear in your reality. Therefore, worrying is a curse.

Make the most of the moment.

People tend to worry about the past and future, which is why most of us live in the past or future and worry about what might happen.

The present moment is the only one that's peaceful and quiet, but most people ignore it. They don't realize that life is made up of countless moments. True happiness can only come from the present moment, and it's the only one we can grasp.

Letting go of the past doesn't mean forgetting or betraying. It means rising above experiences and not letting past emotions control you. When you do that, you can be the true master of your life and truly be at ease.

Please stay calm and everything will be fine.

Wishing you well!

Hello, dear question asker!

Thanks so much for inviting me!

It sounds like you're really worried about getting HIV, and I totally get it.

It's totally understandable to feel this way. You're very anxious, aren't you?

From what you've said in your previous posts, it seems like your hypochondriacal symptoms might be linked to some unclean sexual behavior.

I can see why you're worried. Sexual behavior can be a tricky thing.

This can make your anxiety about your hypochondriasis worse.

On top of that, your repeated checking has led to some pretty intense thoughts.

Have you ever found yourself wondering:

Our normal way of thinking is based on cause and effect.

It's a bit like a straight line, with lots of assumptions and tests to verify them.

It's a bit like the police investigating a case. You start off by exploring for clues.

We all want to be sure that what we think is true, and that what we've been told is true too. It's only natural to want to verify and seek proof until our initial assumptions are verified.

I know this process can be a bit anxiety-provoking. Some automatic cognitive distortions can cause us to...

We all have a tendency to deal with problems in a black-and-white, right-or-wrong way.

And even distorting our perception, which can lead us to overestimate things.

I can see how your sensitive and suspicious personality traits have led to this current situation.

You know, to get rid of the problem, you might want to think about finding a counselor.

Could you be a mirror for yourself and continue exploring your own mind?

It's possible that some of your experiences in your early years might be the root of the internal conflict you're facing.

Oh, it's just that it was activated by HIV today?

Oh my, activated?

Come on, I'm your counselor Yao, and I'm here for you!

I'll always be here for you, my friend!

The act of obsessive worrying compels individuals to ruminate on matters that have already been addressed, albeit in the distant past. This incessant thinking leads to a proliferation of potential scenarios, impeding the ability to achieve a state of repose during the nocturnal hours.

Furthermore, your energy is affected, which impairs your ability to concentrate on enjoying your current life. You have observed firsthand the circumstances that prevail. You find that you are constantly compelled to anticipate the worst possible outcome, despite the unlikelihood of such an event.

Nevertheless, the issue persists. Our world is inherently challenging to comprehend in its totality. Our understanding of the universe is limited to a mere one ten-thousandth of its totality. It is plausible that our entire corpus of scientific and medical knowledge represents a mere fraction of the vast ocean of knowledge that exists.

It is therefore imperative that we continue to learn and transform our anxiety into motivation to learn and improve ourselves. I previously engaged in an unsafe sexual encounter with you, but that was in the past. It does not define who you are now, nor who you will be in the future.

Thus, the subject experiences concern regarding the potential presence of symptoms indicative of the acute stage of AIDS, despite having undergone a series of diagnostic tests. It is possible that the window period has already elapsed, yet the subject continues to perceive themselves as normal and healthy. The medical professional has provided assurance that the subject is not infected. However, the subject maintains a lack of trust in the medical professional's expertise and in their own condition, exhibiting a persistent sense of distrust.

The confusion experienced is a result of the individual's own distrust, which subsequently leads to a lack of trust in the world and a high level of anxiety. It is often the case that the human body is susceptible to a variety of ailments, and as such, it is vital to ensure the protection of the body and to endeavour to confront the challenges of life in a positive manner.

It is recommended that you seek psychological counseling and ensure the quality of your sleep. Should you require further assistance, you may wish to consider visiting the psychiatric department of the hospital.

Please clarify the question.

Good afternoon!

After listening to your statement, I'd like to offer some advice based on the issues you've raised.

First, let's talk about the problem you've been obsessing over and thinking about a lot.

From what you said, I get the feeling that you're dwelling on this issue not because you're worried about the disease itself, but because you're concerned about the consequences of that risky behavior.

The tests show that you're not sick, so you're healthy. Don't worry too much about the disease. Worrying too much will give you other diseases.

Some studies have shown that your mood can affect how severe your disease is. Some people with incurable cancer take drugs that stimulate dopamine.

These kinds of drugs stimulate the nerves and make people excited. I need to stay happy and optimistic, and stop thinking about things that don't matter.

Firstly, we have been diagnosed by a doctor and we are not infected. You should trust the advances of medicine and your own body.

Secondly, it would be a good idea to exercise more to improve your physique.

Finally, try not to give yourself any hints about something so that you unintentionally think about it. It's a good idea to clear your mind a bit, keep the good memories and get rid of the bad experiences.

Secondly, regarding this unsafe behavior.

From what you've said, it seems like you're a perfectionist. It's clear that you're preoccupied because someone's words have made you doubt and resent this matter.

It's also a good idea to have a stable sexual partner. In the adult world, you need to learn to reasonably satisfy these needs and not act recklessly like you did this time.

If you're still struggling with this, I've got a few tips that might help.

First, stop reading negative opinions and don't put the same labels on things. Just because something happened to someone else doesn't mean it will happen to you. Believe in science and the development of medicine.

Why do you think bad things are going to happen to you?

Secondly, during this time, keep your mind busy, work hard, learn a new skill, in short, do anything that interests you and that you can easily achieve. This way, it is less difficult to accomplish, and it will bring you inner satisfaction. You will continue to do this for a long time, and you will also have a sense of joy from your achievements, which will help you slowly forget these negative emotions and negative things.

Finally, set aside about half an hour every day to clear your mind and do something relatively quiet. This will help you calm down and think about things more clearly. Ask yourself: What have you gained today? What is happiness?

What is happiness? What did I do wrong?

What have you done well? This sentence is a way to make yourself not think about this matter, let alone search online for information related to it.

As the old saying goes, "If you keep company with the good, you'll become good; if you keep company with the bad, you'll become bad." If you do positive things every day, your mood and thoughts will be positive. You will hear some negative news and things every day, and your mood will be affected, pulling you from a high place to a low one.

Everyone makes mistakes. The key is how you handle them. The best approach is to identify the root cause and avoid the risk!

Don't dwell on it and torture yourself mentally. Love yourself!

I believe in you! You can do it!

"I am currently experiencing a state of cognitive dissonance, and I am attempting to engage in conscious reflection on this matter." What would be the outcome if the questioner were to refrain from becoming overly invested in the issue and instead maintain a state of detached observation?

Given the preoccupation with obsessive and compulsive thinking, it is pertinent to inquire as to how the questioner will occupy their time.

One day, an individual made an observation that something had developed on my back.

At the time, I was unaware of any sensation due to the presence of a shallow mark on my back.

However, I recently observed that the mark on my back is not particularly conspicuous, prompting me to consider whether it might be a consequence of HIV infection and the onset of acute symptoms.

If the subject had not engaged in the act of unsafe sexual intercourse due to ignorance and lack of judgment, would the questioner have exhibited such behavior?

Do you have a strong suspicion that you have been infected with the human immunodeficiency virus (HIV)?

"I had an unsafe sexual encounter prior to this due to my lack of knowledge and judgment," it is possible that the questioner's superego is particularly stringent in its standards of conduct. Consequently, when such an incident occurs, the questioner's superego may be inclined to impose a swift and decisive form of retribution.

The current obsessive thoughts and compulsive thinking may be a form of self-punishment imposed by the superego. It is as if the individual is being made to remember and fear repeating the act in order to reinforce the superego's belief that such behaviour is deserving of punishment.

Alternatively, the "superego" may perceive the act in question as analogous to an HIV-like infection on the "spiritual" level, which is perceived as a terrifying and dreadful occurrence.

The past is irrevocable; it cannot be altered or erased. Therefore, you are certain that if something does indeed grow on your back, it must be caused by the undetectable HIV that you have contracted. Despite having undergone numerous tests and receiving confirmation from medical professionals that you are not infected,

Eliminating this virus from the heart is a challenging endeavor. One potential strategy for alleviating the questioner's concerns is to conduct daily monitoring of the back for any growth. It is crucial to maintain persistence in this process.

I am sincerely convinced, and it is my hope that my reply has been helpful. Best wishes,

Greetings, My name is Xincheng Guitou.

A review of the question description reveals the emotional distress caused by the worry about getting sick.

Problem description

The questioner was concerned because, following unprotected sexual intercourse, a friend informed him of the presence of a growth behind his back. This raised concerns that the sexual behavior may have resulted in HIV infection symptoms.

Despite undergoing numerous tests, the results consistently indicated that he was not infected. Nevertheless, he remained concerned.

Despite the low probability of infection, the questioner remains highly distressed, preoccupied with concerns about the potential link between his condition and HIV. This persistent worry and the recurrent thoughts associated with it are a significant source of distress.

[Problem analysis]

I have once again reviewed the questioner's problem description.

The questioner is concerned about the possibility of being infected with the HIV virus, which has led to a state of persistent anxiety.

When our minds perceive a situation as real, our brains emit a distress signal, prompting the body to respond in a manner that mitigates the perceived danger and eliminates potential risk factors.

Despite undergoing numerous medical examinations and receiving confirmation from multiple doctors that he is not infected, the questioner remains convinced that he contracted HIV from the aforementioned inappropriate sexual behavior and has already developed corresponding reactions.

The questioner indicated that, approximately one week after the sexual encounter, a friend observed an anomalous sighting.

Has the questioner ever observed whether the object in question precedes or follows the sexual act?

The brain is an intriguing organ. It is adept at discerning and interpreting evidence, particularly when it aligns with a preexisting belief.

It is unlikely that the questioner would be concerned about contracting HIV if they had previously observed the mark in question.

It can be reasonably deduced that this pattern of unsafe sexual behavior is the primary source of the poster's emotional distress.

It is generally accepted within the field of psychoanalysis that obsessive thoughts and behaviors are often associated with sexual themes. The questioner, too, had experienced such concerns following a sexual encounter.

Typically, if an individual engages in sexual intercourse with a person they do not particularly desire, particularly if it was not something they were eager to do, and this is coupled with a cognitive evaluation shaped by some negative sexual concepts, it will lead to a desire to eliminate this negative emotional state.

It is recommended that the following course of action be pursued:

It would be beneficial for the questioner to become aware of the following:

The question thus arises as to whether she has a negative concept of sex and how she perceives sexual behavior.

2. Was the other individual in this sexual encounter satisfied with the experience?

3. Does she wish to eliminate the feelings aroused by the sexual act, or the relationship itself?

A friend of mine was not permitted to express her anger within the domestic environment during her formative years. Her parents were austere, and she frequently exhibited a capacity for reasonableness.

However, following the birth of her child, she found herself unable to tolerate a number of the child's behaviours, which caused her considerable discomfort and distress. The child itself was not the result of her desired circumstances, having become pregnant unintentionally and given birth, which led to a pervasive sense of anger.

However, she is unable to express her anger.

Consequently, she is perpetually concerned that she will harm her child. For instance, she is anxious that her child will be struck by a vehicle, that she will transmit infectious agents to her child due to inadequate dishwashing, that she has HPV and will infect her child with it, resulting in uterine cancer, and so forth.

Following communication, it became evident that the subject was experiencing feelings of overwhelming fatigue and exhaustion. This was attributed to the presence of depressive symptoms during the gestational period, coupled with the emergence of interpersonal challenges within the couple. The responsibility of meeting the energetic demands of the infant, including activities such as play and shopping, and the necessity of maintaining attention, were identified as significant contributors to her fatigue. However, these feelings remained unexpressed.

Consequently, the mind is exceedingly angry, which results in self-denial and the conviction that the individual is malevolent. This ultimately manifests as a desire to eradicate all thoughts and circumstances that may pose a threat to the child.

It can be seen, then, that if the objective is merely to eliminate external dangers, this is a relatively straightforward process. However, if the aim is to eliminate one's own unexpressed needs and emotions, this is a considerably more challenging endeavour.

It is recommended that the questioner consider postponing the appointment for a brief period and scheduling an appointment at a more renowned and authoritative medical facility for a comprehensive examination, including an identification of the cause of the mark behind. It is also advised to reassure oneself while becoming aware of the emotions and genuine needs behind these concerns.

It is my hope that this response is of some assistance to you. I wish you the best of luck!

Hello, question asker! I can feel your inner anxiety, worry, and confusion from your description, but I'm here to help!

After having an unsafe sex act and being reminded by someone else that you have something growing on your back, you start to worry that you have been infected with the HIV virus.

Even if you've done lots of tests and the doctor says you're not infected, you still have this niggling suspicion that it's not possible to detect the cause.

This fear makes you feel anxious, but you can take control! You just need to know what to do.

You can see that you feel remorseful about your actions and consider yourself ignorant and foolish. This incident has made you feel very uneasy because it has made your life lose control — but you can take control again!

☻️ This incident has damaged your narcissism, but you can fix it!

You had unprotected sex, and you regret it. You think you shouldn't have done something so stupid, but you're going to make up for it!

You are more afraid of letting things get out of control than you are of being infected with the HIV virus. This sense of loss of control is something you are unwilling and unable to bear, so you can't help but want to do something to take control in advance!

If it is not resolved immediately and you do not get a definitive answer, it will damage your self-esteem. But don't worry! There are ways to get the answers you need.

So even if the doctor tells you that you are not infected, you will still try to take control of the situation and put your mind at ease.

☺️ Embrace yourself, just as you are!

You might want your life to always go according to plan, and that's okay! It's not easy for anyone to do that, but you can still make it happen.

Absolutely! We can accept the current situation.

No matter what, it's already happened. Be brave and face the fact that your narcissistic fantasies have been shattered. Try to experience the feeling of being unable to change something bad that has happened. It's an amazing feeling!

When you try to accept that we can't control life every moment, you'll be able to forgive yourself for any mistakes you make and move on to a brighter future!

Wishing you the very best!

Good morning! Allow me to extend a warm greeting from afar.

It is not uncommon to experience feelings of unease, fear, anxiety, and a lack of self-acceptance following an incident of unsafe sexual intercourse.

Even if you have undergone a series of tests at a medical facility and have been diagnosed as not having HIV, it is still important to address your inner anxiety and worry. Furthermore, this anxiety, unease, and excessive worry about your physical health have clearly affected your normal life and require you to make certain adjustments and changes.

From your description, it is evident that you have reservations about your own sexual behavior and feel a sense of disgust towards it. This has led to a strong sense of guilt and self-blame. It is important to recognize that our past actions, regardless of how they may be perceived in hindsight, were driven by genuine needs of the body and mind at the time. Everyone who is self-aware makes decisions based on what they believe to be the best choice at that moment.

It is important to remember that regardless of whether you choose to engage in sexual activity voluntarily or are forced to do so against your will, you must believe that you have done your best to protect yourself. What are your thoughts on this matter?

Sexual behavior is not inherently shameful or dirty. It is an instinctive physiological need, similar to eating. Many individuals feel ashamed of sex because they have suppressed their sexual needs excessively and then satisfied them in an inappropriate manner (which can result in harm to themselves and others). As long as you are an adult and have taken appropriate self-protection measures, you should not be overly critical of yourself or feel disgusted, as sexual needs are not shameful. All legitimate needs should be satisfied, provided that the method of satisfaction does not cause harm to yourself or others.

It is important to accept your sexual needs and the fact that you have satisfied them in a way that you think is not good enough for the first time. You may find it helpful to conduct further research into this topic. We recommend the following resources: "Heidi's Sexology Report," "Kinsey's Sexology Report," and "The Wonders of Sexology." We hope you will be honest about your experiences and accept your sexual needs.

My name is Lily, and I am the Q&A Center's point of contact for your inquiries. On behalf of the entire team at the Q&A Center, I would like to extend our warmest regards to you and our sincere appreciation for your interest in our services.

Hello!

I am a heart exploration coach, and learning is the treasure of the body!

From your description, I can feel your inner doubts, worries, anxieties, struggles, pain, and a sense of being overwhelmed. But you can overcome these challenges!

The worries and anxieties you have about a single unsafe sex act are not worth dwelling on here. But I would love to give you three pieces of advice that I think you'll find really helpful!

I have a suggestion for you! I think you should try to accept your current situation.

Doing so will make your heart feel slightly lighter, which will help you think about what to do next!

You said that you had unprotected sex out of ignorance and stupidity, and a few weeks later, someone told you that you had something growing on your back. So you suddenly suspected that you might have contracted HIV when you noticed that the mark on your back was not very obvious. You also did a lot of tests because of this, and although the doctor told you that you were not infected, you are still worried about your current situation and are very conflicted. You have been thinking about this problem all the time. In fact, your situation is understandable, because anyone who has had unprotected sex is likely to worry and suspect that they have been infected with HIV. So you have to try to understand your own state and "see" that anxious and worried, but temporarily confused self that doesn't know what to do. This will take your mind off things, otherwise your brain will be filled with all kinds of negative emotions.

And the best part is, when you allow yourself to try to accept your current situation, it makes it possible to promote change in the status quo! It may sound contradictory, but that's because change is based on allowing for no change.

Secondly, I suggest you take a deep breath and look at your situation with a fresh perspective.

Rational thinking is a great way to understand yourself and reality better!

To gain a rational view of the situation, you simply need to do two simple things:

The first thing you need to know is that modern medical technology is really impressive and the HIV test is very reliable.

You did the right thing by getting the relevant tests done because you had doubts. The doctor said you didn't have an infection, so you can choose to trust the doctor. You've got this! Current medical technology is sufficient to give you confidence.

Second, get excited because the person who said you had something growing on your back was probably just talking casually and was probably referring to that shallow mark.

In other words, you probably misunderstood the meaning of the person who said you had something growing on your back. But don't worry! It's an easy mistake to make.

When you look at it in this rational way, you'll be amazed at how quickly some of those negative emotions will disappear!

Once again, I suggest that you focus on yourself and think about what you can do to feel more relaxed. You can do this!

When you look at your situation rationally, you'll know exactly what to do! Focus on yourself and do your best.

For example, when you are in doubt, you can tell yourself, "I have already had the relevant tests, and the doctor said that I do not have an infection. I need to trust the doctor." This kind of suggestion may make you feel better, not to mention the fact that you also know that the possibility of you being infected is very small. So, go ahead and trust your doctor!

You can also try the method of "free association" when you force yourself to think about this issue, let your mind wander, and see what happens. You may well realize that the worst things that worry you are just imagined in your mind and are not facts! You have enough evidence (the doctor's instructions) to prove that such things have not happened, so you can relax!

You can also force yourself to do other things when you are stuck. This method of distracting yourself may make you feel better because part of your attention has been diverted. In short, you need to know that you can do something to improve the situation, and you can!

Once you start taking action, you'll be amazed at how quickly those negative emotions start to melt away. It's incredible how action can be the best remedy for so many of life's challenges!

I really hope my answer helps you! If you want to chat some more, just click on "Find a coach" at the bottom of the page and I'll be in touch!