A college student becomes very cautious and afraid when others show interest in her. How can we help her?
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By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024
I am a college student, and one of my friends unknowingly became someone else's mistress. Here is what happened: My friend told me one day a year ago that she was in love, and the other person was 6 years older than her. They showed their affection everywhere, and as a friend, I was happy for them too, until a month later, the other person's wife came over and kept scolding her for ruining someone else's family, and even hit her. It was pretty serious at the time, and the most outrageous thing was that initially, it was clear that the man took the initiative to pursue her, but on that day, he evaded responsibility and actually said that it was my friend who seduced him. Later, my friend's reputation was ruined, and she was constantly being gossiped about. In the end, she could no longer bear it and sent a chat record to prove that the other person pursued her first, and she was the victim. Only then did the matter come to an end.
But since then, she has been afraid to fall in love again. She becomes very cautious and even a little afraid when someone shows interest in her. How can I help her get over it?
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Comments
I can see why your friend is feeling so hurt and cautious now. Maybe start by reassuring her that what happened wasn't her fault and that there are genuine people out there who won't take advantage of her.
It sounds like your friend has been through a lot. Encouraging her to express her feelings, whether through talking, writing, or even art, could help her process everything she's been through and gradually rebuild her trust in others.
Your friend must feel incredibly betrayed. Supporting her by spending time together doing activities she enjoys might remind her of the joys in life outside of relationships and help restore her confidence.
Given how deeply this experience has affected your friend, it might be beneficial for her to seek professional counseling. A therapist can provide a safe space for her to work through her fears and insecurities about dating.
What a terrible situation for your friend. Perhaps you could introduce her to positive role models or stories of healthy relationships, showing her examples of mutual respect and support that can exist between partners.