A high school girl, liked by an annoying boy, how does she get along with someone like that?

Hello, host!

I can feel your worry and your troubles when you just started school and encountered such a thing. You just entered high school and are eager to study hard and focus your energy on your studies. You have your own plans for your future, and I know you'll succeed! But encountering someone like this will indeed affect your mood and your studies.

Let's find out what happened!

You were noticed by a boy in high school right after you arrived, and you feel that he has a crush on you. Every time he acts in an exaggerated manner to get your attention, I believe that your appearance must be outstanding and you must be an excellent girl. In high school, adolescent boys will pay special attention to and behave in a special way towards the girls they like. Girls are harassed by boys, but they secretly feel a little happy inside. They feel affirmed in their own excellence and have a little sense of superiority inside. This boy, in attracting your attention, also has an inferiority complex and is afraid to face you directly, which shows that he is also well aware of your excellence.

If you want to switch seats, you can just talk to the teacher! After all, in high school, learning is the most important thing. If you feel that your learning plan is being affected, you can directly communicate with the teacher!

You're worried about being embarrassed when you meet this boy in the future? You have a similar mindset. I can tell you don't want to hurt this boy. You're a kind and good girl. Let's keep our minds straight and treat the naivety of adolescence correctly.

Good day. I extend my sincerest apologies for your recent difficulties. I am at your disposal to provide any assistance you may require. Please accept this gesture of goodwill: a 360-degree hug.

From your initial inquiry, it is evident that you have faced this challenge at a pivotal point in your high school experience, which can undoubtedly be a significant source of frustration.

This situation is reminiscent of a popular idiom: "What do you like about me? I'll change if that's what you want." While this may be amusing, it is nevertheless a source of considerable frustration. However, it is important to remain focused on the task at hand and to recognize that progress can still be made despite these challenges.

What options are available to you? Changing classes seems impractical, given that you have already switched to a new class.

Furthermore, even if you are not in the same classroom, it is still an uncomfortable situation to be aware of the existence of such an individual.

From a psychoanalytic perspective, when we experience strong negative feelings towards someone, it may be because we admire certain aspects of their personality or because we are drawn to them.

As children, boys often engage in teasing behaviors towards girls they are interested in, or they may develop negative feelings towards individuals they perceive as more successful than themselves.

This is a defense mechanism in psychoanalysis called reverse formation. As the name implies, the opposite is bound to occur.

Naturally, this is merely a theory. I am unaware of the specifics of your situation, so I am merely providing this information for your reference. You are encouraged to consider this objectively. Aside from your negative feelings towards this individual, are there any positive aspects you admire about him?

Furthermore, you are currently in high school and will soon be taking the college entrance exam. Your parents may advise you to avoid forming romantic attachments, or may make other statements indicating that it is not advisable to do so at this time, as it may impact your future prospects. You may concur with your parents' views, but subconsciously desire to challenge them to some extent, which creates a certain degree of internal conflict.

You may wish to either fall in love or rebel against your parents. However, you then realise that this is wrong, so you find someone else to blame. This is often the other person, who you perceive as repulsive.

There is no viable course of action.

Naturally, this is merely a conjecture.

It may be necessary to identify the psychological reasons behind your negative feelings towards this individual. Once you have a clear understanding of your own emotions and needs, you will likely be able to make an informed decision.

There are also some straightforward and somewhat unorthodox methods. As you mentioned, you're unsure if you're being self-absorbed, so it might be helpful to assume that you are. Then, remind yourself that self-absorption is not a sustainable approach and that focusing on your studies is a more beneficial use of your time. You'll eventually become someone they'll regret not pursuing, and this approach might help you achieve that goal.

You may also wish to consider speaking with a counselor.

I am a counselor who is often Buddhist and sometimes depressed, but I am also capable of being positive and motivated. I want to extend a message of love and support to the world.

Dear Sir/Madam,

The definitions of like and dislike are at the discretion of the individual. If the situation does not affect you, it is advisable to refrain from involvement. If the situation does affect you, it is essential to develop the necessary skills to navigate it effectively. In all cases, mutual respect is paramount.

During the formative years, one's preferences are frequently met with a multitude of unusual responses, particularly from males, who often leave individuals perplexed. This may be a contributing factor to why males often remain immature until the end of their lives. In contrast, females tend to be more mature and perceptive, and many of them have their own feelings. However, sometimes they are too shy to confirm these feelings, which can result in missed opportunities or the addition of unnecessary complications due to self-absorption.

The original poster's immediate reaction was prudent. It is inadvisable to make assumptions about a person's feelings without receiving a clear indication from them.

It is important to recognise that individuals express themselves in different ways. Therefore, it is not appropriate to substitute your own thoughts for those of others. In the current climate, if a male is genuinely interested in a relationship, he will find an opportunity to express his feelings. If he is lacking in the courage to confess his love, it may be advisable to allow him the space to develop.

If you have an interest in someone, it is advisable to communicate this clearly.

Regardless of how the boy expresses himself, it is essential to maintain a firm stance on your beliefs. If you are fully focused on your studies, then you should tactfully decline the boy's confession. The most successful relationships are those that are tested during the maturation period, when both parties are still young.

High school represents a significant transition point in the learning stage. If a connection is present, exercising restraint and perseverance will enhance future interactions. Conversely, if no connection is evident, it may be more prudent to refrain from involvement at this time. If the individual in question has never expressed romantic interest, it may be advisable to disregard such overtures. Ultimately, the peacock's tail display can be both intentional and physiological.

The ability to practice self-control and not be distracted by external factors is an essential skill to develop during this learning phase.

If the boy's behavior affects your daily life and he does not make a clear statement, the host should take measures to protect themselves, such as requesting assistance from the teacher and class committee in maintaining normal class order. It is challenging to assess the situation without distraction when someone is consistently acting inappropriately.

Furthermore, you can disseminate your ideas through other individuals. This allows you to accentuate your commitment to academic pursuits and your disinterest in forming friendships during your high school years. This will help to mitigate potential issues. Thirdly, it is beneficial to spend more time with individuals who share similar interests. You can engage in joint study, practice questions, discuss or participate in other group activities. A full schedule will serve as a distraction, and the various activities of the aforementioned individual will not be as noticeable.

Hello, question asker.

From your description, I can sense your embarrassment, your feeling of being at a loss, and a hint of fear. You are in high school, have never been in a relationship, don't want to fall in love, and feel that the attentions of a boy you don't have feelings for are more of a nuisance. So you want to stay away from him, but you don't know how to do it without hurting his feelings.

You can gain a comprehensive understanding of the situation by analyzing your own psychology and that of the boy's psychology. Then you can decide how to proceed.

1. Develop self-awareness and understand the reasons for your emotions.

I believe you are a studious and well-behaved student who instinctively rejects flashy boys because you think they are "bad" students who may not have good intentions towards you and will not care about your feelings. You also subconsciously feel that good students should not fall in love or have contact with such boys, so you will reject him very much. Since he has shown that he has a good impression of you, it also shows that he is attractive, so you don't need to feel embarrassed or apologetic.

There's another reason, too: you don't like this guy.

You don't know how to respond to his behavior. You can ignore it. You're afraid to refuse directly and also afraid that you're overthinking it. If his behavior has seriously affected your studies and emotional stability, you can refuse his request the next time he asks you. Consider his feelings and don't embarrass him. Immerse yourself in your studies or spend more time with your friends.

2. Analyze the inner psychology of his behavior.

2. Analyze the psychology behind his behavior.

He's always looking at you, talking loudly to show off and get your attention, and even often leaning over to look at your notes. He's got a crush on you. He's also got a showboat personality, wanting to show off to get attention.

It's also possible that he's only briefly focusing his attention on you. It won't last long because he's just enjoying seeing you at a loss for what to do in the face of his behavior. After a while, you keep ignoring and rejecting him, and he'll find it uninteresting and stop or change his goal.

It's also possible that he likes you but doesn't know how to show it. If so, he'll try to get closer to you by attracting your attention. If he really likes you, he'll also care for you in other ways. Look out for this behavior.

3. Speak up and take control of the situation.

You said you want to talk to the homeroom teacher about changing seats. If he doesn't stop after a period of time of ignoring and gentle refusal, you should discuss with the other students in the class to see if you can switch seats with each other.

If he's trying to disturb you and get his own satisfaction, ignore him. Let him watch if he wants, just immerse yourself in your own things. When you don't pay attention to him, you'll feel calm inside. If he has further behaviors that disturb you, explain to him that you feel uncomfortable and hope he doesn't do it.

If the situation gets worse, seek help from other students and teachers.

I am confident that the above will be helpful to you. Best wishes to you.

Hello!

I'm a mindfulness coach, and I believe learning is the greatest gift the body can receive.

From what you've said, I can tell you're feeling conflicted, worried, embarrassed, and like you're stuck.

I'm not going to get into the nitty-gritty of why you're having trouble getting along with a guy you don't like. But I do have three pieces of advice for you:

First, I suggest you try to understand and accept your current situation.

It'll also help you feel a bit more at ease, which will give you a clearer idea of what to do next.

You say you're a high school girl who's just started a new class. It's only been a week or two since the semester started, and you feel like a boy is always looking at you and always attracting you, intentionally or unintentionally. You feel like he likes you, which makes you really uneasy and embarrassed because you want to study hard and have never thought about falling in love. So you're really torn. In fact, if you were in the same situation as another girl, you'd probably feel the same way because you've just started a new class and are often looked at by a boy you don't know that well. Most people would feel uneasy, and the feeling of being liked by someone can sometimes be worrying. Not to mention that you're now in high school and just want to study hard, so you have to try to understand and accept yourself. You need to "see" that inner, somewhat embarrassed, but temporarily anxious self that doesn't know what to do. This will give you extra mental energy to think about other things. Otherwise, your mind will always be surrounded by all kinds of negative emotions.

It's also important to allow yourself to understand and accept yourself so you can make changes in your current situation. It might sound contradictory, but it's true because change is based on allowing for no change.

Secondly, I suggest you take a rational look at your own situation.

Rational thinking can help you understand yourself and reality better.

To take a rational approach, you need to do two things:

First, remember that you're in high school, and it's normal to be interested in the opposite sex. It's also understandable if he really likes you.

It's normal for students in adolescence to experience physical and psychological changes. They'll also be curious about the opposite sex, like to get close to the opposite sex, like to show themselves off in front of the opposite sex, and even have hazy thoughts of love.

It's likely that he's interested in you and has a good impression of you. This includes the fact that you're sensitive and concerned about what he does to you. It's also possible that you've become interested in him. All of this is understandable. Once you understand this, your state may seem like this because you know he doesn't mean any harm and it's probably due to puberty.

Second, remember that things don't have to stay the same. You can change them if you want to.

When you take the initiative and put in the effort, your mindset will shift, as will your relationship with him. This can help you feel more positive.

Once again, I suggest you focus on yourself and think about what you can do to feel more at ease studying.

When you take a step back and look at the situation rationally, you'll probably have a good idea of what to do. At this point, you just need to focus on yourself and do your best.

For instance, you could have a chat with him and let him know that speaking loudly affects other people. When you're talking to him, try to be calm and collected so that he'll stop speaking that way. You'll feel better too.

If you're sure he always looks at you, which is affecting your learning state, you can also try asking him why he always looks at you. This way, you may also know what he means. Even if he says he likes you, you may not be so embarrassed, because you can tell him that you like him, but you don't want to fall in love now, and you hope he won't affect your studies. At the same time, remind him to concentrate on his studies, which is the key now. This way, he may well turn his liking for you into a driving force for learning, and it won't affect you anymore.

If he still looks at you all the time and it's affecting your studies, you can talk to your teacher and ask to change seats. Just say that the boy next to you always talks. But be prepared for the teacher to say no, because she may think it's a trivial matter. Even if you change seats, if you're still attracted to his every move, he'll affect your learning. What he does is his business, but whether you approve of him or whether he affects you is your business. You need to focus more on your own studies so that you won't be affected by him so much.

You might also want to try to accept his current situation (that way, you won't hate him so much and be less affected by him). Just understand that he might be doing that to attract your attention or that he might have a good impression of you, but you can choose not to identify with it or care about it. Focus on your studies, and that will also make you feel better. You won't be embarrassed when you get along with him, and so on. In short, you need to know that you can do something to improve the situation.

When you start taking action, the various negative emotions in your heart will naturally start to dissipate, as action can often be the best way to combat them.

I hope this helps. If you want to talk more, just click "Find a coach to interpret – online conversation" at the bottom, and I'll be happy to chat with you one-on-one.

All individuals serve as beacons of light, whether they are the ones asking questions or answering them. Words have the capacity to illuminate the hearts of many people, and this is our shared energy.

Good day, I am Xin Tan, Coach Fei Yun. I empathize with your concerns regarding self-discipline. As you transition to high school, your primary objective is to excel academically. You have adapted your mindset to prioritize your studies and plan for your future. However, you have encountered an individual who has caused you to become more vigilant, temporarily distracting and confusing you.

Let us examine the nature of the problem.

1. Interpret the other person's behavior in a straightforward manner, given your concern about not being unduly influenced by others in your studies.

From a series of behaviors and mannerisms, it can be surmised that the other person may have a crush on you. They may be using small actions to attract your attention.

As you stated, he vocalized his actions in a boastful manner, as if he did not intend for the entire class to be aware of his actions. It is understandable that he would want to share his accomplishment with others, rather than limiting it to a single individual.

Adolescent high school students are still in the process of developing their identity and are concerned about the opposite sex, especially during the period of intense pursuit of self-fulfillment. This is often manifested in questions such as "Who am I?" and "I'm different from everyone else." Some students use behavior to "prove" themselves, while others focus on their studies, which also implies an element of "proof."

Given that children at this age require a greater degree of trust and respect, it is understandable that they seek to be seen, affirmed, recognized, and accepted. However, it is important to note that this classmate's behavior is more overt than what might be typical.

It is also possible that he has a romantic interest in you. It is preferable to maintain confidentiality and avoid damaging the friendship. Once the secret is revealed, the other person, particularly a male, may be inclined to deny the situation, even if it causes them embarrassment.

?2. It is imperative to respect the other person while simultaneously maintaining one's own sense of boundaries.

Given that all students are enrolled in this particular high school, it can be reasonably assumed that they share a common objective: to gain admission to college and advance their lives to the next level.

In light of the fact that the new school year has only been in progress for approximately a week or two, it is akin to a child who has not yet reached maturity and has therefore "gone wild." One may choose to "observe the consequences" and subsequently assess how the individual in question fares in terms of academic performance and classroom discipline.

Should one wish to be free from distractions, it would be advisable to tactfully request a seat change from the teacher, citing nearsightedness as the reason. It is likely that the teacher will understand.

Furthermore, if one is so inclined, one may utilize this individual as an opportunity to "train" one's ability to resist distractions and "temper" one's determination. After all, in the context of a college entrance examination, a multitude of variables may potentially arise. In the past, I responded to a student's inquiry regarding my inability to tolerate the proctor's presence during their walks around the examination hall. Similarly, in a classroom setting, I found it challenging to concentrate when my classmates were moving their desks.

On occasion, one's energy may be unable to be focused on the present, and this may also be caused by anxiety. It can be said that "this moment is the time for practice." One can either attack or defend; one can decide for oneself how to choose.

It is my hope that the aforementioned information has provided you with a new perspective and a greater range of options. Best regards,

Should you wish to pursue this discussion further, you are invited to click on the "Find a Coach" link, which you will find in the top right-hand corner or at the bottom of the page. I will then be in touch to continue our dialogue on an individual basis.

Hello, questioner! Perhaps we could try learning to be our own spiritual gardeners, watching over the blossoming of spring and the harvest of autumn.

From your description, it seems that you have welcomed a new opportunity for growth. You have entered a new class, need to integrate into a new environment, and encountered new problems, which will undoubtedly bring new growth.

Life is about learning and growing through adapting to new things again and again.

It has only been two weeks since the semester started, and you have encountered a new challenge. You feel that you are being liked by a guy who, in your opinion, is the type to frequently enter into relationships. Some of his actions make you feel somewhat passive and unprepared. You are unsure of how to interact with him, and you are concerned that it may impact your studies.

You are feeling a little embarrassed and anxious about this, and you would like to know how you can face it and deal with it calmly.

By addressing the issue, we may be able to make the following efforts:

1. Perhaps it would be helpful to approach this matter with a proactive and courageous attitude, without avoiding or being afraid of it. It might also be beneficial to view it as a lesson for your own growth.

Learning is not only about books, but also about life. Your decision to seek help on the Yi Xinli platform is a testament to your proactive approach as a student. I also encourage you to reflect on your attitude.

Could I ask you to consider which direction you would like things to develop in? Perhaps you could also think about what you could do to achieve this development.

I believe that after this emotional experience, you will gain valuable insights into how to best interact with yourself, others, and relationships.

2. It would be beneficial to reduce mutual projection and communicate well.

Your current impression and feelings about the boy may be influenced by your personal judgment, and you are not sure whether this judgment is accurate or whether you are just "hoping to be self-obsessed." It might be helpful to seek the opinions of other girls in this situation.

It might be worth considering that if a guy really has a crush on you, that's something to be happy about. If you're brave enough, you could also ask him what he thinks of you and whether there's any projection in his view of you.

It's also possible that because you respond to and accept his behavior each time, he may feel that you're paying attention to him. This suggests that everyone sees people differently for the same thing.

It is often best to avoid causing unnecessary panic due to "assumed" projections when making judgments. Thoughts (judgments) can affect emotions, and emotions can create reality. Therefore, it may be helpful to consider the truth of judgments.

3. Consider your attitude and express it in your words and actions.

It is important to remember that, regardless of the sincerity of his feelings, you have the power and responsibility to influence events. This should be expressed through your actions. If you are feeling worried or scared, it may be because you are allowing this to happen.

For instance, if you're not ready to get to know him, you might consider ignoring the various signals he sends. You could also adjust your seating position if you feel it would help. Over time, he may sense your preference and adjust his own behavior.

It might be that you simply want to be friends. In that case, you could respond to his interactions in a way that doesn't avoid communication but clearly sets boundaries. He might be able to read your notes, but you could be at peace with that.

Perhaps you have other ideas and would like to make your own decisions.

In short, this is a wonderful time when schoolwork is important, but youth is also a time of growth and development. The relationship between the little excitement of being liked and the deeper rules of studying hard is also a topic of growth. You should believe in yourself and, whether you are a boy or a girl, take the initiative to find a way to handle it.

I hope the above analysis is helpful to you. I wish you the best of luck in your studies!

It's like trying to calm a tree in the wind.

The original poster wants to study without getting distracted by love. But love is a natural part of adolescence. It's like a 2-year-old learning to walk — it's all practice for a better life.

This means that when a boy notices her, she will blush, her heart will pound, and she will have complex thoughts. These are normal signs of physical development. The looks and actions of the opposite sex also affect your emotional acceptance system.

It is recommended that the questioner accept that they have reached puberty, crave attention, and crave to pay attention to others.

I accept that I can choose to think more or less. Either way, there will be consequences.

I take responsibility for my choices. This is how I deal with it.

Think about it. Everyone has different goals. If you don't want to be in love, that's fine. Just don't let it affect you.

Hello, I can see you're feeling confused, so I'm here to support you.

You seem to be having some interpersonal issues. Please accept my warm hug.

I can see how you might be liking the annoying boy, but I think there's another way of looking at it.

I think you might be influenced by the "law of attraction" in psychology.

So, what is the "law of attraction"?

It basically means that when you focus your thoughts on a particular area, people, things, or objects related to that area will be drawn to you.

(The above definition comes from Baidu Baike.)

The next time you feel like that annoying boy is looking at you in class again, just concentrate on the task at hand.

What does that mean for us?

When you see him looking at you, just bring your attention back to the present.

For instance, try focusing on taking down the teacher's notes on the blackboard.

When you're focused on a task, you don't have time to dwell on irrelevant issues.

It's also likely that the boy who was bothering you didn't realize he was looking at you.

I really hope you can resolve the issue you're facing soon.

I'm afraid I've nothing more to add at this stage.

I hope my answer was helpful and inspiring to you, the girl. I'm the answer, and I study hard every day.

Here at Yixinli, we love you and the world loves you too! Best wishes!

Hello, dear questioner!

After reading what you wrote, all I want to do is study hard. I never want to fall in love. You have so much positive energy! It's great that you made studying your priority in high school. It really helped you grow. First of all, I want to give you a big thumbs up!

High school is such an exciting time! It's the period of adolescence, when you're at your most active and thinking about all kinds of things. It's totally normal to have lots of different thoughts at this age. Just as you said, your classmate wears flashy clothes and seems to be in a relationship a lot. He might not be the most active among you, but it's still totally normal for people at this age.

It's totally normal to feel like you don't want to concentrate on studying. At this age, there are all kinds of differences among the students around you, and these are all totally reasonable. So, I think the first thing we have to do is to see this, accept this, and allow others to exist in their own way.

I really think that if I can think of so many things, then I may be able to solve the problem of how to get along with this classmate in the future, just like you said. If you feel so embarrassed, I'm sure we can work it out together!

You might say that I don't pay as much attention to my focus-all-your-energy-on-your-studies-21525.html" target="_blank">studies as they do, and I don't appreciate that about them either. What should I do in the future? Let me give you my personal opinion!

I think it would be really helpful to observe this student for a few more days. It'll help us understand whether he really has such a personality or whether he's just paying too much attention to you. Maybe she really cares about someone next to you? When he looks at your notes or smiles at you, it'd be great to see whether she has other intentions. In other words, you can see how he treats other people. As you said, let's not flatter ourselves.

I feel like we're all pretty self-absorbed, don't you think? It's just our human nature! We're all a little narcissistic and always think that our thoughts are the thoughts of the other person. And it's not just you, it's almost everyone! So it's really important to look at other aspects of performance.

If you can do it now, as you said, I will focus on my studies, and that would be best. We don't have to worry about how he is doing. He'll figure it out!

She pays special attention to us, but we don't care about him. He has his own agenda, and he just has a crush on her. We don't pay attention to him either, because our hearts and minds are fully focused on our studies. We don't take him seriously anyway, because our goal is to study, and we just want to bring our abilities into full play and use them on our studies, doing this wholeheartedly. I think that all your problems will be solved if you can focus on the facts.

I have another idea, too. If you really can't do it and you really can't focus on observation, we can think about it this way: you said it yourself, he's wearing fancy clothes like someone who's been in many relationships. Then I don't think we have anything to fear. It's just that he's paying temporary attention to us, but if you judge him accurately, then he will definitely transfer his attention to someone else in a few days. So there's really no need to worry too much!

I have no doubt that you'll find a way through this, just like you always do. I know you're going to have an amazing high school experience and get the university of your dreams!

I'm sending you all the good luck in the world! I love you!

Dear little sister, I just read your words and I like you! You must be a good girl with excellent grades and conduct. You must also be smart and beautiful, otherwise you would not have been able to attract the attention of the boys just after entering a new class. Am I right?

It's also a good thing that the boy likes you because it means you're attractive. As you said, he's a "flirtatious and often in love" person, which means he's seen a lot of people at a young age.

He's been around the block a few times, so the fact that he keeps his eyes on you and tries hard to get your attention shows that you have something that catches his eye and that you are different from the girls he usually hangs out with.

You said you only want to study and not fall in love at this stage, and I think you're doing a great job of that! You have a very strong sense of purpose and know what you should and shouldn't do at the moment. If more children had clear goals like yours, many families wouldn't be so chaotic every day.

Your issue is that you're unsure of how to tactfully tell your teacher that you'd like to switch seats, and how to interact with this person in the future. In reality, the best way to handle this is to ignore him.

You watch all his performances without reacting, and he gets no response from you. After a few days, he stops looking at you and goes back to hanging out with his usual group of friends. At this point, whether or not you switch seats is not that important.

I hope my answer helps you figure out what to do. Love you.

Good morning,

While there is a boy who frequently pays attention to you, you feel a sense of satisfaction, yet you are not well-acquainted with him and have formed a negative impression. Furthermore, his loud speech in your vicinity impedes your learning. In light of this, I believe you are experiencing considerable frustration and uncertainty.

The teacher and you can analyze it together, if that is agreeable to you.

[Regarding boys]

The boy in question has been observed to engage in behaviors such as staring, talking loudly, and displaying himself in an ostentatious manner. Based on these observations, it may be inferred that he has a favorable impression of you and is attempting to gain your attention.

However, he is apprehensive about contacting you due to a fear of rejection. This indicates that he may still have an inferiority complex and a desire for attention from others. It's also possible that he is an outgoing and carefree individual.

You may draw inferences from his behavior, such as whether he follows you in secret. Alternatively, you can allow time to elapse and observe how things unfold.

[Regarding adjustments to seating arrangements]

There are several options available for your consideration. You may wish to discuss this with your teacher.

1. Due to your vision requirements, you need to adjust your seating position.

2. Due to physical limitations, you require a seat near the window.

3. You wish to change seats and sit with a classmate who is a model student, with the intention of learning from her.

In summary, as long as you present your case with reason and evidence, the teacher will be receptive to your request.

[How to foster a positive work environment]

1. He is currently impeding your studies. If you wish to avoid him, switching seats is an effective solution. This allows you to focus on your studies without interruption.

2. Further reading on the subjects of physiology and psychology will help to dispel any remaining mystery and curiosity about the opposite sex, as well as the tension that may be experienced when interacting with them.

3. Normal communication with classmates. For example, when he looks at you, you can also look at him. His gaze may turn away immediately due to fear.

Should he fail to look away, you may stare at him and enquire as to whether he requires assistance.

It is recommended that you treat the communication as normal communication between classmates. This should help to reduce any feelings of nervousness or anxiety.

Thank you for your question, Mr. Zeng. As a listening teacher, I hope my answer will be of some assistance to you. Best regards,

Hello, I am a psychological detective coach and a psychological listener at One Psychology, Ms. Liu the Panda.

I can understand your confusion. We often want to know how to gain the favor and even the favor of others. However, it seems that when faced with the favor that someone we don't like may convey to us, we feel awkward and don't know how to handle the boundaries of this interpersonal relationship. We are afraid that we may be being paranoid, that our interpretation is subjective, and that we will cause an awkward situation. At the same time, we are also worried that this is the case, because the prerequisite for feeling happy about being "in love" is that you don't dislike the person.

Firstly, it is important to recognise that we will experience being liked and disliked in our relationships throughout our lives. Our minds have information processing systems that help us to screen and analyse the feedback from the outside world, and respond accordingly.

First of all, it's important to recognize that the meaning of "he" is not as crucial as the impact it has on your current state.

Ultimately, your goal should be to minimize the disturbance caused by this person. However, it is important to acknowledge that you may not have a positive opinion of this person, even if they show goodwill.

It might be helpful to remember that you always have the right to say no.

If I might humbly offer my perspective, I believe there is indeed an error in our social feedback because none of us are others.

If we act on a wrong judgment, we may make a mistake. I'm thinking that perhaps, in this situation, running over to reject it abruptly might create some unnecessary conflict and contradiction, and might be interpreted as "wishful thinking." It might also make us feel uncomfortable.

If you're uncertain about someone's motives, you can take comfort in knowing that their feelings are genuine. It's natural to want to protect our boundaries while also trying to avoid negative consequences.

On the other hand, I believe it would be beneficial to give your intuition some moderate trust. When encountering such situations, in addition to worrying about how to avoid the impact, we may also have self-doubt about whether we are overreacting. However, since the problem has already arisen, it is likely that your feelings are not sudden. Our senses are very keen, and we can notice different looks, tones of voice, and attitudes.

From your description, it seems that he frequently looks at you, which could be interpreted as an attempt to gain your attention.

2. If we assume that this person really has a crush on you and wants to get "attention," especially to gain the favor of others, it is easy to fall into the trap of blindness. That is, we will think that every move we make will be appreciated and interesting by the person we like, and we will feel that we are special. However, the truth is often quite the opposite.

Perhaps it would be helpful to take a closer look at his words and actions.

While we cannot be absolutely sure of this person's attitude, it seems likely that he wants to be noticed and become a "socialite" in the peer group. When we face a new group environment, we tend to adopt different strategies. Some people are afraid of being marginalized, some are afraid of being ignored, and some hope to be accepted by the group quickly.

As a result, they may try to show off to others, raise their voice, and desperately try to stand out and be in the "spotlight." However, it is important to remember that expressions should also pay attention to the occasion and boundaries.

Sometimes this kind of behavior can have a positive effect, but sometimes it doesn't. It's possible that excessive self-aggrandizement might lead to a situation where the person creates a seemingly flowery social atmosphere for themselves, and might become so lost that they can't even sympathize with the feelings of the people around them.

It would seem that he does not consider the learning environment of his classmates, and even talks during self-study, which may affect the learning environment of some of his classmates. Could it be that

His behavior is causing you some concern.

It seems that, especially with you, this person may be trying to present themselves in a certain way, which could be perceived as offensive.

Perhaps he is unaware that his words and actions may not be as polished as he believes. It seems he is trying to gain your attention in a way that he thinks will be effective.

In this matter, if you feel that you are not being selfish, then perhaps he is. Either way, it would be beneficial for us all to learn how to handle relationships in society.

It would be beneficial to learn to regulate your own feelings.

Dear friend,

I understand that romantic relationships may not be your current focus. You have other important life goals and aspirations, and you have something you want to hold on to firmly. If I may suggest, it might be helpful to establish your own boundaries. Any emotional relationship is based on mutual affection. You don't have to become friends or even lovers with someone you don't like or appreciate.

You have the option to stand up for yourself.

As you grow up, you may encounter people who have negative feelings towards you, or people you like who have negative feelings towards you. You may also experience confusion when someone touches your boundaries. It's okay to feel this way. After clarifying your thoughts, you will gain the understanding needed to solve the situation in an appropriate way. Then, you also need to get yourself back on track.

Perhaps it would be helpful to try not to let this matter bother you all the time.

III. Based on your situation, I would like to make the following suggestions:

(1) When you feel that this person may be sending you signals, it is important to remain calm, avoid becoming hostile, and refrain from making any hasty compromises.

It is not uncommon for relationships in school to be delicate at times. We all hope to work hard to create a relatively stable and harmonious interpersonal environment for ourselves, so that we can focus on our studies. However, it is important to consider the potential consequences of our actions. If you rush to tell the teacher that the boy might be secretly in love with you, ask to change seats, or go over and say in front of everyone that you don't like him, it could cause relatively serious damage to his self-esteem. Additionally, it could also affect your own emotions and affect your academic performance.

You mentioned the issue of changing seats. If you feel it would be beneficial to change seats, you could consider speaking with your teacher. You might explain that you're having difficulty seeing the blackboard clearly or that the discussion in the back row during evening study is a bit too loud and distracting for you. You could suggest moving to the front row. Teachers are very sensitive to the issue of early love, so once the teacher makes a judgment, it might not be the best approach. You might want to proceed with caution.

At the same time, you may wish to consider indicating that you are not interested in him. "Not responding" could be perceived as a kind of response. It may be helpful to remember that the more eager you are to be noticed, the less you should respond to him. Even if he talks about this and that, you may wish to ignore him. It's understandable that people's attention will always be affected by the variables in the environment. It's like someone playing music and arguing in a quiet library. People may be inclined to go and watch. It's not because they like it, it's just our instinctive reaction.

However, it would be beneficial for you to learn to do the opposite. When he wants to talk to you, you could calmly tell him you have something to do, or that you need to go to the bathroom or get a glass of water. Even if you know he is looking at you, it would be helpful for you to stay calm and focus on listening to the teacher or reading a book. Or you could calmly ask him what he wants. If you remain calm, he will slowly understand and "know when to quit."

It might be helpful to remember that if you seem nervous or flustered, he might misunderstand.

I believe that rejection can also be a courageous thing. It is important to remain calm and collected so that he understands that he will never be able to cause any distress or upset you.

(2) Should he cross your boundaries, you may politely express your attitude. Given that you have only just met, it would be best to be polite as a classmate.

If he is truly interested in pursuing a relationship with you, he may try to find ways to connect with you, such as asking you out or sending you messages. You can politely let him know that you are currently unavailable and that it would be inconvenient for you at this time. With time, he will likely understand. However, if he expresses a stronger interest, you can also find an appropriate time to gently explain that you do not have any romantic feelings for him and that you are not interested in pursuing a relationship with him further.

If he doesn't do these things, perhaps it's best not to say anything beforehand, as it might be more embarrassing.

It might be best to avoid exaggerating things before the facts are really clear. At school, getting along with your classmates doesn't necessarily mean you have to be best friends with everyone. You will meet people who really share your interests. You might not have to accept all of them. You will find friends you trust in your school life. Everyone is a classmate who shares educational resources in the same environment. When group activities are needed, it's already great to do your part step by step. After class, you can play with your classmates you get along with.

It might be best to treat him as you would any other classmate and maintain a certain distance.

(3) In a new environment, many things are subject to change, and it is helpful to have faith that things will evolve over time.

It might be helpful to consider that when we first enter a new class, our own and others' state of mind may be somewhat unstable, particularly given that many classmates will not yet know each other. This can result in a relatively noisy classroom environment, with many people choosing to remain silent and observe the situation. However, it's worth noting that after about a month, the situation will likely change, and everyone will begin to adapt to the new environment and follow the class rules.

It's also possible that he's going through a period of adjustment and trying to find a balance.

It would be beneficial for you to find your own rhythm of learning. It is important to remember that human energy is limited. It seems that you may be expending too much energy on this person because you dislike this classmate. This could be causing you to feel nervous about what he thinks, afraid of whether he really likes you, and troubled. These feelings could be affecting your state of mind.

Perhaps what you could benefit from is learning to focus on your tasks and goals without letting worries get in the way.

It might be helpful to make a study plan for the week and to take a deep breath and open your books when you feel anxious.

Allow yourself to be influenced by the winds from all directions, but remain calm and collected.

I truly hope things improve for you.

I am grateful to you for taking the time to read this.