A senior high school girl with poor self-regulation, how to alleviate the stress from the current situation?

Hello, classmate! I'm here to tell you that you can overcome this feeling of being watched. I wish I had a magic spell that could silence all thoughts with a single incantation and return you to a world of peace.

As I write this, the first mantra comes to mind: Sit back, relax, and let go of your furrowed brow, clenched fists, and tense heart. I'll be with you. Let's take a look at why the demon of "peeping" is hovering in the shadows, staring at you as you prepare for the college entrance exam. But don't worry, I'm here to help!

Your former classmate, the male student, has been your good friend since the second year of high school, and you have helped each other. It's a great relationship! Helping each other improves each other, so if he can help you, why would he secretly spy on you, afraid that you will surpass him?

The college entrance exam is a very stressful event, and it is also a battle that has been exaggerated as being too tragic. For example, improving by one point means eliminating thousands of people. This kind of exaggeration can make it seem like if he really changes from being friendly to being jealous, hoping that you are not as good as him, then he has been hypnotized by the atmosphere of the college entrance exam competition, and sees all his former friends as enemies. But if he doesn't think this way, for example, if he really just looks, or if he just habitually glances and accidentally sees your exam paper, or if he likes you and what he likes to look at is not your homework but you, then you have been hypnotized by the tension of the college entrance exam, and your brain is filled with competition, so you see any kind of gaze as a gaze of competition and challenge. This is exciting because it means that you can choose to see any kind of gaze as a gaze of competition and challenge, or you can choose to see it as something else!

This is not something I made up. From a psychological perspective, people in a state of excessive tension and competition may experience perceptual distortions and heightened interpersonal hostility. For example, I once met a high school senior who, due to excessive tension, felt as if the playground suddenly rose up during his morning run. This is perceptual distortion, an illusion of spatial perception. Interpersonal hostility means seeing enemies everywhere, and feeling that everyone is treating you as an opponent.

This is a reaction of our brain in a state of high alert. So, to help you get rid of this lingering feeling of being "spied on," you can try to exclude your classmates from looking at you from the outside! You can explore from within whether you are too nervous and see your classmates' unintentional actions as spying on you.

Or, if it is the classmate who is too nervous and really always spying on you, how can you turn this around and use it to your advantage?

Hello, Questioner!

From your description, I can sense your inner confusion and helplessness. At the same time, you also have a very good ability to perceive this uncomfortable emotion and to face it bravely, which is admirable.

You mentioned that the college entrance exam is coming up soon, and that what happened with the boy you were close with in your sophomore year made you feel uncomfortable. It seems that this has affected your studies and life, and you feel somewhat helpless in the situation. Is that correct?

I would also like to offer you a warm hug.

All problems can be viewed as resources. We all have the capacity to solve problems. As long as you are aware of them, you are already on the path to change.

Based on your description and my feelings, I would like to offer some suggestions in the hope that they will be helpful.

It might be helpful to consider seeking support from external resources.

It seems that you may lack inner strength at this time. You might consider talking to your parents and teachers, who could help you. You could also seek the support of a counselor, who could provide you with the inner strength you need to adjust your state of mind and have the strength to study for the exam and get the results you want.

Secondly, you might like to consider diverting your attention.

From your description, it seems that your classmates may have influenced you in a way that makes you constantly aware of uncomfortable emotions. It's understandable that you want to change this. One way to do so might be to think in reverse, find the positive side, find positive experiences, meditate, and use positive mental suggestions to adjust yourself.

It would be beneficial to learn how to adjust your state.

In life, we will encounter all kinds of problems. It may be helpful to adjust our state of mind, learn to release emotions, find someone to talk to, or find a way to release and vent emotions through exercise. We can also consider learning some communication skills and learning to express our feelings without emotions. This could be beneficial for our interpersonal relationships.

It would be beneficial for you to learn to look within yourself. From your description, it seems that you still care a great deal about what other people think and feel, as well as some of your own actions. It would be helpful for you to turn your attention to yourself, learn to look within, become more self-aware, and adjust yourself so that you become more confident and powerful inside. This way, you will not be influenced by others.

It is often said that our relationships with others are shaped by our relationships with ourselves. Those who have experienced healing in life are often the ones who are willing to embrace it. If you persevere, you may find a way through to overcome the problem.

I would like to suggest a few books that I hope will be helpful.

I would like to suggest the following books for your consideration: "Mr. Toad Goes to the Psychiatrist," "The Courage to Be Disliked," and "The Brain Code for Happiness."

I can feel the pressure and pain in the questioner's heart. However, the questioner lacks sufficient awareness, understanding, and knowledge of their inner emotional feelings. They are not aware of what these emotional feelings are expressing, and they have a strong sense of self-morality, which is why they are caught in their current predicament and unable to extricate themselves. The questioner needs to deeply perceive their inner emotional feelings and what they are expressing to extricate themselves from such a predicament.

The questioner noticed the boy looking at her. She thought he was looking at her homework and afraid she'd outperform him. Her brain did a series of "conscious processing" about the boy looking at her. But what was the truth? Only the boy knew. If he liked her, he'd look. If not, he wouldn't.

The questioner should think back to how they feel about boys looking at them. Do they dislike it, or not dislike it, or do they like it? The series of mental processes that follow is something they should think about too. Is it really like that, or is there something else? This line of thinking is provided here for the questioner's reference.

You have a basic human instinct to be noticed by others, and there's nothing wrong with that. Even if the opposite sex likes you, it's because you have something about you that makes others like you and accept you. Don't suppress your instincts—it'll only make you feel more miserable.

Listen to your heart and understand your inner needs. Give yourself what you need without affecting your normal study and life. These troubles will turn into happiness for you.

Good day.

As you approach the college entrance exam in just over three months, it's understandable that you might be feeling some anxiety. After all, third year of high school is a pivotal time, and it's natural to experience a range of emotions as you prepare for this significant transition.

In the third year of high school, students are typically divided into classes according to their chosen major, which can sometimes lead to a competitive dynamic within the class. The competition can become quite intense.

A sense of unease and a competitive spirit have led to some unusual dynamics in the relationships between classmates. In the second semester of your second year of high school, you came to realize that a boy you had considered a close friend was monitoring your activities.

In the first semester of your senior year, you become aware that your classmate, a girl, may be observing you. This could be attributed to your keen sense of competition.

It is understandable that you are in competition with each other, as you both aspire to take the national college entrance exam. Given that you have chosen the same major, it is likely that you will compete with each other within a limited circle. In such a situation, the individual with the higher grades may be perceived as the winner, while the one with the lower grades may be seen as the loser.

It is therefore particularly painful for you when someone spies on you and interferes with your studies. You feel that they are infringing on you in a way that is not respectful of your feelings, and that your academic performance is the result of your personal efforts, which should not be copied, spied on, or marked by malicious competition.

The voyeurs tend to distract you and take your attention away from your studies, as if they were there to annoy you. They do seem to succeed in that, and you feel annoyed and worn out. You find yourself always thinking about them and on your guard against them, which unfortunately prevents you from concentrating on your studies.

You also experience headaches. You share this with your parents, but over time, they don't seem to understand your perspective and think you're being overly sensitive. You feel like you're going crazy. You scolded the boy classmate and now you're writing notes to the girl classmate.

The more you think about it, the more uncomfortable you feel. It is becoming increasingly difficult to concentrate on your homework, and you are also finding it challenging to focus in class. You are constantly worrying about the possibility of being spied on, distracted, and unable to compete with others.

It may be the case that the high level of tension and anxiety is making it increasingly challenging for us to manage our emotions. It seems that we are struggling to understand the other person's intentions by monitoring their actions, and in turn, the individual being monitored may become perceived as an 'imaginary enemy'.

If it is a challenging competition, it may feel as though we are rushing to the front line together before the college entrance examination. It's possible that we may perceive a lot of 'imaginary enemies'.

It is important to remember that our human energy is limited, and our attention is easily distracted, especially when we are overly anxious. However, as a senior high school student, the college entrance exam is just three months away, so it is understandable that you might feel anxious.

It might be helpful to consider seeking professional psychological counseling to reduce your anxiety before the college entrance exam.

It might be helpful to consider that the "imaginary enemies" you're facing are just thoughts that come up alongside your anxious emotions. There are many thoughts you have, and this is just one of them.

It might be helpful to consider ways of giving ourselves some rest or breathing space, given the pressures we face. Making sure we get enough rest is also a good way to restore motivation. Stress relief for the college entrance exam is a popular topic in our area, and it is a main focus of psychological counseling. You might find it beneficial to explore this option and let a counselor accompany you through this challenging period in your life.

Hello, question asker! I'm June Lai Feng.

Thanks for letting me know how you're feeling. You seem like a girl who knows herself well.

From what you've shared, I can see that you're experiencing a range of complex emotions, including disgust, anxiety, and pain.

We need to tackle each of these issues.

If you think your classmate is checking your homework because he's afraid you'll do better, it might be because he's competitive or insecure. It's a sign of competitive anxiety and insecurity. There are complex psychological factors behind everyone's actions. If this makes you uncomfortable, you can talk to that person to express your feelings and see if you can create a more positive and supportive learning environment.

Meanwhile, focus on your own learning process, maintain your personal academic integrity, and try not to let the actions of others affect your emotions and motivation.

In psychology, when you notice your classmate peeking at your homework and feel disgusted, you may feel that your personal space and personal efforts have been violated. In a learning environment, everyone wants their own independent space and time to complete their homework, and when someone tries to peek, it can cause a strong sense of discomfort.

You think your classmate is peeking at your homework because he's afraid you'll outperform him. This may be because he doesn't trust you. This sense of mistrust may have made you view his behavior more negatively.

Disgust is an emotional reaction that's usually tied to a negative evaluation of someone or their actions. Your disgust might be a natural response to your classmate's behavior, especially when it goes against your personal values and expectations. It's a way of protecting yourself against unfair and disrespectful behavior.

Stay calm and confident in the face of his sideways glances. Don't let his behaviour affect your emotions or studies.

You can keep focusing on your own studies and let him know you're not distracted by his gaze. Or you can take steps to protect your rights and emotional well-being, like communicating your feelings to your tablemate, asking the teacher to intervene, or changing seats to avoid direct visual contact.

The key is to find a way to reduce this discomfort and maintain a good learning environment.

At the same time, you can also try to understand his behavior from his perspective. Maybe he didn't mean to disturb you on purpose; it was just an unconscious act. Thinking this way may help you feel better.

Have confidence in your abilities and value, and don't let other people's actions affect your confidence and self-esteem.

"I think he's afraid that I'll outperform him, so he's watching where I'm writing in my homework." This kind of mentality may be a sense of competition or a sense of comparison. You may value your own grades and want to achieve good grades in your studies, so you think he's peeking at you because he's worried that you'll outperform him.

However, this kind of psychology may also make you focus too much on other people's behavior and neglect your own studies. In fact, everyone learns at a different pace, and other people's behavior doesn't really reflect your learning level.

So don't get too caught up in his gaze. Stay focused on your studies and work on improving your abilities. At the same time, try to stay calm, don't take academic performance too seriously, and relax yourself appropriately so you can better cope with the pressure of studying.

What are your thoughts on this?

There are lots of reasons why he might be looking at you. It could be that he's worried you'll outperform him, or it could be that he's more interested in you, or maybe he was just daydreaming and looked in your direction without realizing it.

Have you thought about speaking with him?

Try to take this matter lightly, don't let it weigh on you, and keep a positive outlook. When you find yourself starting to think about it, try to take a step back and do something else, like look out the window or take a quick walk.

I hope you have a great day!

Hello, question asker! I'm Gu Daoxi Fengshou Slender Donkey, your Heart Exploration coach.

I totally get where you're coming from, so please, let me give you a big hug.

It might be helpful for the questioner to ask themselves a few questions:

If you give all your homework to someone else to copy directly, will they definitely get good grades on the exam? The college entrance exam may test the same question type, but not the same question. Copying homework cannot copy the logic of answering questions. The question owner is worried that the other person thinks that they are afraid of being surpassed by them, and that using the logic of copying homework will not work. After all, copying in the college entrance exam is not possible, and the consequences will be very serious.

I'd love to know how the questioner's usual grades compare to those of these two classmates! Are they first and second in the class?

I'm just wondering, who is the person the questioner wants to surpass? Is it the top of the class, or the college entrance exam score?

It might help the questioner to try to be clear about their goal, so they don't get caught up in comparing themselves to others.

It's totally normal to be sensitive sometimes. We all have our own unique experiences and perspectives. It's easy to form stereotypes, but it's also easy to break them.

It's so easy to form stereotypes and have a prejudice against someone, isn't it? And when we do, it's only natural that whatever they say will sound like an excuse. I really feel for the questioner in this case. It's so hard to believe the explanations other people give when we have a prejudice against them.

~ I know it can be hard to believe, but let's assume that the other person doesn't want us to surpass her. Does that mean that we can't surpass her? I really like a saying I once heard: "I like the way you can't stand the way I look, but you can't get rid of me."

From this perspective, would the questioner be more willing to show the other person what they think by taking action? I like it more than you do, making you feel bad?

~ Does the questioner sometimes catch sight of something without realizing it? It could be someone else's books, the clock on the wall, or something else. Sometimes, these little glances might be a subconscious habit.

It's important to remember that the other person doesn't have any bad intentions.

How long did the first classmate work before the questioner had a conflict with him? It's possible that the pressure of the college entrance exam was just too great for him, and he needed to give himself a "suitable emotional reason" to distract himself.

In "The Courage to Be Disliked," the girl with a blushing phobia never dares to confess her love to her crush because she is afraid of being rejected. It's so hard when you have a reason not to speak up, isn't it? It means you don't have to face the result of failure.

When you sort out your own problems, it may help the questioner find a better solution. The questioner may even try to make some adjustments!

It's okay to accept your classmates' behavior. We all have different strengths and weaknesses. If you're struggling with your test scores even though you're putting in the effort on your homework, it might be helpful to seek support. If you're doing well in your homework and you're curious about how your classmates approach it, you can chat with them about your different learning styles. This can be a great way to learn from each other and help the person asking the question to feel more comfortable sharing their thoughts.

It might be helpful to rethink your goals. Have you thought about which school you'd like to apply to? And what score you'd need to get in? It's probably not a good idea to compare your grades with your classmates'. Having clear goals can help you focus on what's important.

If the other person doesn't want to do well, it doesn't make you bad! Just as if the other person doesn't want you to eat, you wouldn't stop eating, right?

Maybe the question asker will say, "What does it matter to you whether I eat or not?" It's okay to feel this way! Try to separate the issues. Whether other people want you to do well is their business, and whether you want to do well is your business. When you separate the issues, you can focus more on the main goal.

It's okay to let your emotions exist. When they come, you can try to let them flow. Our brains process thousands of unconscious messages every day, but not many of them enter our consciousness. It's often the things we care about that enter our consciousness, and the more we resist them, the stronger they become. So, try to accept them and allow them to exist, and you'll feel better.

Happiness and unhappiness both come from comparison. It's totally normal! Trying to figure out the best way to compare yourself can really help you feel better. Think about how far you've come, or how much you've grown. These things make us better and better!

I'd highly recommend reading "The Courage to Be Disliked" and "A Change of Heart." And if you'd like some one-on-one coaching, you can click on my avatar for that too! I'm not a counselor, but I'm always happy to help in any way I can.

Wishing you all the best!

Hello, I'm Jokerev. My dear friend, I totally get you! The pressure of senior year is already high, and coupled with the conflicts and confusion in these interpersonal relationships, it really makes you feel exhausted. But you can do this!

First of all, I want to give you a big, warm hug! It's so important to recognize and honor your feelings. You have every right to protect your own space and dignity.

From your description, I can deeply feel your desire for respect and equality, as well as the kind of powerlessness and anger you feel when faced with behavior that may violate personal boundaries. This is not only about competition in learning, but also about establishing boundaries in interpersonal relationships and personal space—and you can do it!

I want to say that your intuition and your reaction were both based on your instinct to protect yourself, which is completely reasonable—and totally commendable!

But life is sometimes like a mirror, reflecting the waves in our hearts. So, let's try to look at this issue from a different perspective! The actions of that boy and the girl who came after him reflect more of their own anxiety and unease than any ill will towards you.

Of course, this is not an excuse for their behavior, but I really hope you can try to let go of the hatred in your heart. It's so important to remember that hatred will only consume you and will not change others.

In the days to come, when you feel uncomfortable, express your dissatisfaction directly but politely. This is a great way to protect yourself and help them understand how to get along with others!

Embrace the opportunity to devote more energy to self-improvement and learning! Your value is not in the eyes of others or in comparisons, but in your own progress and growth.

If parents or other close people cannot give enough understanding and support, don't worry! You can learn to face and accept your emotions and release them reasonably, such as through journaling, exercise, or artistic creation, to relieve inner stress. There will always be ups and downs in life, and the college entrance exam is just one stop. It is important, but it does not mean everything.

Embrace the challenge! Learn to adjust your mindset and believe that no matter what difficulties you encounter, you have the amazing ability to cope with and overcome them.

Everyone has their own unique rhythm, and that's a wonderful thing! There's no need to force yourself to keep up with others. You only need to move at your own pace. The world will be more wonderful because of your uniqueness. Come on, friend, I believe you can get through this difficult time. What awaits you in the future is an even broader sky!

Peeping is wrong, but it's not unforgivable. If you're afraid he'll surpass you, it's because he's competing with you for self-affirmation. To accept and forgive, you have to know how to truly love others. That means wishing them happiness and giving them happiness. If there are mistakes or shortcomings, you can change them. This is the only way to improve your emotions and interpersonal relationships. Everyone has the right to happiness. Don't retaliate, make conflicts worse, and make the other person suffer. Temporary venting to relieve emotions isn't a fundamental solution. You'll still encounter similar conflicts until you learn how to truly love others and resolve conflicts. You can refer to the following content.

To grow and change, you have to learn how to love others, adapt to different situations, correct your energy field, and avoid or alleviate negative emotions.

To truly love others is to want them to be happy and to accept, forgive, and forgive everyone, including the weak, whether they are outstanding or ordinary people. If there are mistakes or shortcomings, they can be corrected. Everyone has the right to happiness, regardless of the closeness or distance of relationships, whether they are right or wrong, gains or losses, and so on. We all hope that others can be happy. People can bring mutual comfort and even joy to each other. It is good to love and accept others and oneself, to tolerate shortcomings and deficiencies, and to be kind at heart. In other words, it is beneficial to others or society, not to despise or reject ordinary people, and not to be jealous or intolerant of outstanding people.

If you don't get along with most people, it can lead to negative energy and emotional problems. To find and have love and suitable relationships and careers, you need to truly love others, adapt to people and things, and correct your energy field. You can also share and exchange what you see, hear, think, feel, or are interested in, including books, movies, music, etc., with others in real life and on the Internet, such as Douban communities.

At the same time, it's important to be content with the little things in your love life.

Negative energy can affect your physical health. To keep your body comfortable and healthy, you can have a full body massage. A head massage includes the forehead and face, which also have meridians. Use deep and firm hand movements to massage the head, and use a firm massage comb to press the stomach. Don't press the stomach on an empty stomach, and then take a walk.

If you're carrying negative emotions or thoughts, you're not going to feel physically or mentally comfortable. You'll find yourself surrounded by unhappy people and situations, and you'll experience interpersonal conflicts, emotional and marital disharmony (which will also affect your magnetic field), and even problems in your academic or career life. This is because when you're too self-centered or focused on self-interest, negative energy builds up. The more self-centered you are, the more your magnetic field will be out of tune with other people's. You need to learn how to truly love others and adapt to people and situations, correct your energy field, resolve conflicts, improve your emotions and interpersonal relationships, and better solve the above problems. In addition, if you know how to truly love the people and things in this world, you'll be less attached to love, experience fewer negative emotions such as separation anxiety and pain, and won't feel a lack of happiness inside. Only then can your life become fulfilling and meaningful.

If needed, they can also help their colleagues grow and change together.

How excessive self-centeredness shows up varies from person to person. It can manifest as a psychological motivation to pursue self-satisfaction, compete for self-satisfaction, suppress self-deprecation and ingratiate oneself, blindly give in order to get, or fear losing. It can also show up as being too narcissistic or inferior, paying too much attention to oneself, generating stress and worry, social phobia, being caught up in one's own emotions and thoughts, attaching too much importance to what others think of oneself, not accepting one's own shortcomings and deficiencies, demanding one's own perfection, being obsessive, controlling, possessing others or demanding that others satisfy oneself, otherwise resenting and being discontent, being unable to let go of oneself to forgive and be forgiving, brooding, and so on.

They're obsessed with pursuing the self, anxious, depressed, and tired, and may even be unable to adapt to people and situations in school or the workplace. If they truly love others and adapt to people and situations, they'll naturally look down on the self and restore positive energy.

In short, do your best, be kind, and don't harm others.

I totally get it. It's totally normal to feel upset and angry when you're in this situation.

It's important to remember that your feelings are totally normal, and that anyone in this situation might feel the same way.

It's so important to find a way to deal with your emotions and focus your attention. I've got a few suggestions for you:

1. **Communicate**: Find a good time to have a calm chat with your classmate. Let her know that you've noticed she's been looking at your homework, and that it's making you feel a bit uncomfortable.

Communication is the first step to solving any problem, and I'm here to help you with that!

2. **Adjust your seat**: If it's possible for you, you can try to chat with your teacher to see if you can move your seat to make things more comfortable for you.

3. **Focus on yourself**: It's so important to focus on your own studies rather than the actions of others. You can try using earplugs to reduce external distractions.

4. Relaxation techniques: Learning relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, or yoga can be a great way to help you relax when you feel stressed.

5. Seek support: Talk to a friend or family member you trust about how you feel. It can be so helpful to just unload your thoughts on someone you trust!

6. **Professional help**: If this state of mind continues to affect your studies and life, don't hesitate to reach out to your school counselor. They're there to help!

Remember, the college entrance exam is a big deal, but it's just one part of your life. Stay healthy and positive, and know that you can get through your current difficulties.

Wishing you the very best of luck!

Perhaps it would be helpful to give yourself a hug.

In light of the situation you described, we would like to offer some suggestions that we hope will help you relieve stress and improve your learning environment.

You might find it helpful to speak with a school counselor or a professional psychologist. They can assist you in managing these emotional challenges and provide guidance on effective coping strategies.

It might be helpful to communicate with your parents again. You could try to have an in-depth conversation with them to let them understand how you feel and what is bothering you. They may be able to offer support and help.

If it is possible for you to do so, you might consider communicating with your teacher to request a change of seat. This could help to reduce the immediate cause of your discomfort.

It might be helpful to learn relaxation techniques. These could include deep breathing, meditation, or mindfulness exercises. They can help you stay calm when you feel anxious.

It might be helpful to build a support network. You might consider finding some friends or classmates you can trust and sharing your feelings with them. Sometimes just talking about it and getting it off your chest can help reduce stress.

It might be helpful to focus on your own learning and progress, rather than the actions of others. Everyone has their own learning rhythm, so it's probably best not to pay too much attention to others.

You might find it helpful to set learning goals. Having short-term and long-term learning goals in place can help you stay motivated and focused.

It would be beneficial to maintain healthy habits such as getting enough sleep, eating a balanced diet, and exercising regularly. These practices can help improve your overall well-being.

It is important to accept your emotions and to recognize that everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses. It is not helpful to be overly critical of yourself in this regard.

In light of the current circumstances, it may be helpful to focus on preparing for the college entrance exam. This could be a valuable way to prioritize and potentially ease other distractions.

It might be helpful to remember that you are not alone, and that many people also have difficulty when faced with stress. You might find it beneficial to seek help and take positive steps to overcome these challenges.

I wish you the best of luck!

First, I want you to tell me what learning is. It's not just about acquiring knowledge for yourself. It's also about helping your classmates improve together.

Knowledge is high-frequency energy, and virtuous children are its favorites.

You are obsessed with your grades, which fills you with fear. You have nowhere to vent this fear, so you project it onto your classmates.

They are mirrors, reflecting your current state. Thank them, don't resent them.

First, accept yourself as you are, whether it's your grades or this scattered state of mind. You must accept yourself to make peace with yourself.

Second, you must approach learning with an open mind and enjoy the learning process.

Don't study mindlessly for results. Don't live up to your parents' expectations or shoulder their fate.

You study to gain knowledge, expand your horizons, and use that knowledge to help others. That is the meaning of learning.

If you want to succeed, you must have an open and relaxed mind.

There's an old saying: "Be willing to give." If you're not willing to share your knowledge with your classmates, you can't expect others to help you.

When a classmate peeks at your homework, you ask them directly, "What don't you understand? I can help."

Helping others is how you achieve self-fulfillment. When you explain a problem to someone, you feel happy. In this happy and highly charged atmosphere, you will gain unexpected inspiration.

New ideas will spring up, and you will unintentionally consolidate your knowledge.

Be brave. Be yourself. Find your original self from childhood.

You've got this!

Dear questioner, I would like to begin by expressing my empathy for your situation. It is evident that you are currently facing significant challenges and uncertainty. I want to reassure you that you are not alone in this experience.

It is inevitable that we will all experience periods when the pressures of the world seem overwhelming. However, it is important to have faith that these difficulties will eventually subside and that we will emerge from them with greater resilience.

I would like to offer an alternative interpretation of the situation you describe. It is possible that the actions of these two students were not motivated by malice, but rather by their own stress and their attempts to find a way to balance.

In attempting to comprehend the motives of others, it is frequently the case that circumstances are not as unfavorable as initially perceived.

I will now present a narrative that may evoke a positive emotional response. The story concerns a young girl who was preoccupied with the fear that others would ridicule her perceived deficiencies.

One day, she encountered an elderly man of discernment. He informed her that "every individual possesses a unique radiance, though some may require a period of time to discern it."

After listening to the story, the young girl began to search for her own radiance with great fervor. She learned to appreciate herself and also to accept the differences in others. Ultimately, she became a happy and confident person.

This narrative illustrates that when individuals cultivate self-appreciation and regard for others, they can attain a state of inner tranquility and resilience.

In psychology, a method known as "mindfulness meditation" has been demonstrated to facilitate greater attention to present-moment feelings, which in turn has been shown to reduce attachment to past experiences and fear of the future. One may consider setting aside a period of time each day to engage in this practice, which involves quietly paying attention to one's breathing and feelings. This approach has been shown to promote relaxation and nourishment of the mind.

In response to your inquiry, I would like to proffer some specific counsel.

1. It is recommended that you attempt to communicate with the two students in a frank manner. Identify an appropriate moment to discuss your feelings with them. You could say, "I observed that you were looking at my homework, and it made me feel somewhat uncomfortable."

"It is hoped that we can all concentrate on our studies without disturbing each other." Through communication, they may come to understand that their behaviour is causing distress and be willing to make changes.

2. It is advisable to seek external support. This may be in the form of close friends or family members, who can provide emotional support and encouragement. Alternatively, one may wish to consider consulting a psychological counselor, who can offer more professional help and guidance.

3. Build self-confidence: Identify your own strengths and work on them. Develop a study plan, set daily goals, and reward yourself for achieving them.

Such an approach will not only facilitate enhanced learning efficiency but also bolster self-confidence.

Fourthly, it is advised that students learn to relax. This can be achieved through the utilisation of relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing, meditation, or yoga. These techniques have been proven to be effective in the alleviation of stress and anxiety, thus facilitating the attainment of a state of peace and equilibrium.

5. Develop Hobbies: In addition to academic pursuits, it is important to allocate time for relaxation and recreation. Engaging in leisure activities such as painting, music, reading, and others can foster a sense of enjoyment and well-being.

Such activities will not only facilitate relaxation but also enrich one's life and spirit.

6. In conclusion, it is imperative to emphasize that regardless of the difficulties and challenges one may face, it is crucial to have faith in one's ability to overcome them. Each individual is a distinctive and invaluable entity deserving of a radiant future.

It is imperative to have confidence in oneself and to proceed with courage.

Hello question asker!

You didn't finish writing.

I can't think straight. I can't concentrate in class. I'm always worried and in pain. I feel like I'm going crazy. I'm like before, but worse.

I feel your pain. Hugs!

High school is hard. Anything can make us feel bad. The college entrance exam is important to us. We feel afraid and nervous, and we show this in different ways.

In high school, I had a bad experience with my homeroom teacher. He never changed our seats, and I was always in the window seat, which made it hard to see the blackboard. I went to see him about it, but he ignored me. I was angry all day and didn't pay attention in his physics class. I just burned myself out, not wanting to study in his class or be his student. It was a really tough time for me.

Sometimes people think strange things and there's no reasoning with them. This is how you see things and think about your feelings. It's real and painful. I think high school is so stressful that we need an emotional outlet to relieve the burden. This is another way to protect us.

High school students usually experience discomfort, but the reasons may differ. To cope, you can face your feelings directly and accept them.

Knowing this, but a senior high school student is in adolescence, in the prime of youth, why should I be so angry? I just want to talk about it, I just want to fight for it. Fortunately, you already have experience dealing with this kind of feeling. You can also find a trace of meaning in the experience of the last time. It is because you don't want to repeat the approach of that time that you come here for help. This is your own growth.

You're aware of yourself and have come here to seek help, which is half the solution. You've grown since your sophomore year. You say your feelings haven't changed, but I think you've reflected on them and realized how painful they are. You're aware of the pattern, and you've come here to talk about it, which has already helped. Spend some time feeling and experiencing whether it's been alleviated.

Weak ability to adapt is not a disadvantage. We can adjust. It's not even four months until graduation. Think positively. Even if a classmate doesn't want you to do well, you can surpass him. We have studied for more than ten years. His thoughts from the past few months can't stop us.

If he's that capable, he'd be a god.

You're spying on me, aren't you? You want to make me look bad.

I'm not going to let you succeed. Let's learn from the Gaori period. This time, we won't confront him. Our father will focus his energy on us. You can spy on him. Just keep your eyes on your textbooks. It's only 100 days.

Just cheer for yourself.

Have a favorite school in mind? Imagine it beckoning to you and talk to it every day.

You can see the difficulties, you know what to do, and you will find a way to make it work. You will spend these 100-odd days of high school life in a colorful way.

Good luck! I love you!

Dear Sir/Madam, I am honored to be able to answer your question and hope that my suggestions will be of some assistance to you.

From your description, it appears that the issue may be rooted in our internal cognitive processes. It seems that you have developed a strong sense of animosity and misunderstanding towards your classmates, which has led to an increase in internal distress and the creation of non-existent problems to occupy your mind, resulting in a significant negative impact on your well-being.

It is recommended that students seek the assistance of the school's mental health teacher in a timely manner to help regulate their emotional state. If conditions permit, students can also request that their parents take them to the hospital for a detailed examination and seek the help of professionals.

Furthermore, it is possible to be self-aware. In the event that one's studies are significantly disrupted and the resulting circumstances are not conducive to one's classes and courses, it is possible to request advice from one's class teacher regarding the possibility of arranging a special seat. This could entail sitting alone in the first row, looking up, and seeing only the teacher, with the aim of avoiding distractions on a physical level and separating oneself from other students.

Nevertheless, this approach is only a short-term solution and does not address the underlying issue. To effectively address the core problem, it is necessary to implement regulatory measures to reduce the learning pressure and internal friction.

It is my hope that with the assistance of qualified professionals, you will be able to better manage your anxiety and maintain a healthy balance between your daily studies and other aspects of your life.

I extend my love and affection to the world and to you.

Dear student, I just wanted to send you a quick note to say hi and that I'm thinking of you. I hope my reply can support you in some way.

Senior year is tough. Studying is a challenge, and you also have to navigate relationships with your classmates. It's a lot, and you might feel like your classmates don't want you to succeed because they're afraid of being left behind. The more you think about it, the worse you feel. You can't concentrate in class, you're always worried, and it's affecting your mental health. It's time to take a break.

Are you worried that your classmates will do better than you, and do you also want to do better than your classmates? This is human nature. Exams are inherently uncertain, with highs and lows. What is being tested is the foundation and mentality. You are afraid of falling behind, which also shows that you are motivated. What happens if you fall behind? Will you fall behind forever?

University admissions are ranked nationwide, with the reference being the national college entrance exam candidates. If you change the reference, it'll make you feel suddenly enlightened. Even if your classmates get better results than you, it doesn't mean anything; it's just a momentary presentation. What's more important is to accept yourself and believe in yourself.

It takes courage to enter the college entrance exam room. Every year, many people are too afraid to take the exam. They worry about failure and think that the exam determines their entire future. They have too many expectations of the college entrance exam, and the school also encourages this, creating a tense atmosphere. Many people who currently enter college think that they have entered the safety zone and are confused about life.

I admire your ability to face problems head-on. Your classmate spied on you, and you had the courage to voice your confusion and pursue it step by step. The other person denied spying on you, and you felt that they wanted to surpass you. You were worried and scared, but that shows that you are not bad. Do you see your own advantages?

You can choose to keep comparing, or you can choose to do better than you did last time. It's not easy to see all the hard work you've put in over the years, but you should thank yourself for being motivated and persevering. The college entrance exam is a battle without smoke or gunfire. Because of the exam, life is more complete. Think of it as an experience. Whether you succeed or fail, just do your best.

Best of luck!

Good day, question asker. I'm Evan, a counselor of the Jingliu school of thought.

From the description of the questioner, I can sense a range of negative emotions, including worry, pain, and helplessness. I can deeply empathize with the distress and pressure the questioner is currently facing.

It is not uncommon to feel nervous and anxious before a college entrance exam, and it is understandable that the conflict with your classmates has added to your psychological pressure.

The third year of high school is a very important period. The pressure of studying is already very great, and when this is combined with problems in interpersonal relationships, it can really make people feel very tired and troubled. When the questioner falls into a state of doubting others, and the more they try not to care, it could be perceived from a psychological point of view as falling into negative reinforcement.

It may be helpful to consider that your care for the relevant things might be perceived by the questioner as a negative emotion, which could potentially lead to a sense of being unable to move forward.

As the question was posed on this platform, we are unable to delve deeply into the underlying issues. However, we can offer some straightforward suggestions to assist the questioner:

It might be helpful to adjust your mindset. You may wish to consider that your feelings are reasonable, while also understanding that they are not necessarily the truth. Sometimes, our imagination and speculation may exaggerate the truth, which could cause distress.

It may be helpful to try not to avoid or suppress your emotions, but rather to face them, understand their source, and accept their existence. Emotions are not the problem; the problem may lie in how we deal with and respond to them.

It might be helpful for the questioner to communicate with their classmate, a friend they trust, or a teacher to express their feelings and concerns. Sometimes, direct communication can help to resolve misunderstandings and problems.

When communicating, it is helpful to pay attention to the words and phrases used. Rather than simply describing your classmate's behavior when you are excited, it might be more productive to ask her directly about the underlying reasons for her actions or the message she is trying to convey.

It might be helpful to consider seeking professional psychological counseling if you feel that this situation is having a significant impact on your life and studies. A psychologist or counselor can provide guidance and treatment options tailored to your needs.

It might be helpful to set some boundaries. If the questioner feels that the behavior of the same table has caused interference, for example, they could try to set some boundaries. They could tell her that they don't want to be disturbed when they are doing their homework. At the same time, the questioner could also seek help from the teacher or parents to see if the seat can be adjusted.

It might be helpful to try some self-regulation methods, such as deep breathing or meditation, when you feel anxious or uneasy. These can help you calm down and reduce tension and anxiety. While the college entrance examination is important, it is not the whole of your life.

It's important to remember that temporary gains and losses don't define your abilities. Believe in yourself and your ability to overcome the difficulties you face. It's also helpful to arrange your study and rest time reasonably and ensure you get enough rest and sleep. This can have a positive impact on your physical and mental health, as well as your learning efficiency.

It might be helpful to focus on your studies. You may find it beneficial to make a clear study plan and work hard to implement it. When you are fully engaged in your studies, you may find that those chaotic thoughts will gradually subside.

It might be helpful to try to focus on your own growth and progress, rather than focusing too much on others. It's important to remember that the value and achievements of the questioner do not depend on others.

It might be helpful to find support by sharing your concerns with family, friends, or teachers. Their support and understanding could potentially help you reduce your psychological burden. They may also be able to offer advice and support. Sometimes, talking and sharing can also be a good way to relieve stress.

It may be helpful to try to maintain a positive attitude and believe in your ability to overcome this difficulty and achieve good results. If the questioner feels that their situation is more serious and is affecting their daily life and studies, they may wish to consider seeking professional psychological counseling.

Psychological counselors may be able to assist you in better understanding and dealing with your emotions and problems.

I would like to reassure the questioner that they are not alone in facing these challenges. Many people encounter difficulties and challenges during their growth process. The college entrance examination is only one stage in life, and it does not represent the full picture of who you are.

Regardless of the outcome, the questioner has the potential to create their own future. The key is to find ways to face and overcome these challenges.

It is my sincere hope that these suggestions will prove helpful to the questioner in alleviating their distress. I would also like to extend my best wishes for success in the college entrance exam!

Good day. I am Qu Huidong, a psychological counselor who employs visualization techniques.

The individual in question is on the cusp of sitting the college entrance examination, and the kind of intense atmosphere is bound to be a part of life. In such an atmosphere, the individual is becoming increasingly nervous about studying. As a result, the "sneaks" and "peeks" of nearby classmates make the individual feel as if they are facing a great enemy, and the constant distractions have caused the individual's grades to decline.

This is undoubtedly an unfavorable outcome, yet it remains a persistent concern. The excessive nervousness and anxiety that accompany it have become a significant source of distress. If these symptoms abate, the current problem may no longer be as problematic.

Following the observation of your performance by them, it is understandable that you are concerned about being compared and surpassed. However, it is important to consider whether this fear should be indulged. Additionally, it has been noted that when you direct your attention towards them, it naturally results in a reduction in the amount of attention allocated to your studies.

One has the capacity to regulate one's own concentration and may opt to cease any given activity.

It is important to recognize that the thoughts that have a negative impact on you are the ones that repeatedly enter your mind. Rather than resisting these thoughts, which can be ineffective, it is more beneficial to avoid following or engaging with them when they arise. Instead, maintaining focus on the task at hand, such as learning, can be a more productive approach.

Should one's thoughts become unmoored, it is advisable to gently reorient one's attention.

Human energy is limited, and it is preferable to concentrate on the subject matter of the study rather than on unproductive thoughts. As a senior high school student, the pressure to study is undoubtedly considerable, and it is not uncommon to experience some anxiety.

It may be beneficial to seek professional psychological support to assist in managing anxiety, organizing thoughts, and identifying effective solutions. This could facilitate successful completion of this significant life challenge. It is also an opportune time to consider psychological counseling. If this is a suitable option, it is recommended to discuss it with parents or guardians. Appointments for psychological counseling can be made. It is hoped that this support will contribute to a positive outcome.

I wish you the best of success!

Hello, my name is Coach Yu from Xin Tan, and I would love to chat with you about this topic.

We all have an inner world, and it's made up of characters. We're the main character in our story, and everyone and everything else is there to support us. Our emotions, desires, and logic are all part of the story, and they influence how we interact with the people and things around us.

When we meet people and things in real life, we often find ourselves using internal scripts to understand how we relate to them. And those people in our lives who we care about deeply will also be pulled onto the internal stage by us to "perform" our inner drama together.

So, it's up to us how we view relationships! The reason the questioner saw the boy across from her and the girl next to her as prying eyes may be because we're used to getting attention from others and our story scripts are set.

The boy across the street and the girl at the table are our dear friends on the inner stage of our hearts. We use the emotions in our inner world to construct our imagination of real-life relationships.

So, if we pay attention to our relationships with others, we'll see that what we're really looking for is a deeper understanding of ourselves.

Let's ask ourselves: when I looked up and noticed the boy across from me looking at me, what were my thoughts? What emotions and feelings did it bring up in you?

When I happened to see the girl at my desk looking at my exam paper, what were my thoughts? I'd love to know what emotions and feelings that brought up for you!

We can also ask ourselves, when my attention is captured by the fact that the boy across from me is looking at me, and I hate him very much, what is my inner need? What is my inner need to scold him on WeChat voice?

When my attention is captured by the girl sitting next to me, and I really dislike her, what is my inner need? What is my inner need for writing her a note?

We can also ask ourselves some other really helpful questions, like what we've been worrying about lately, what we've been suffering from, and where our suffering is coming from.

If these difficult emotions could express themselves right now, what would they say to themselves?

However, awareness is the first step to making a change, so we can try to be kind to ourselves. When these uncomfortable negative emotions arise, we can say "stop" in time, take a deep breath, and watch them quietly without any judgment. Let the emotions come and go freely like clouds, and drift away slowly like fallen leaves in the water.

We can learn to know ourselves better by taking some psychological tests to see our personality traits and whether we have high sensitivity traits. But we should not simply classify it as vulnerability and engage in self-attack and internal conflict. Try to learn to distract yourself, especially from overthinking, and stop the replay of events in your mind.

When we think about those past peeping incidents, we can try to give ourselves a little pep talk. Take a deep breath and do something else, like listening to music or doing some stretching exercises. Meditation and mindfulness are also great ways to regulate.

And finally, love yourself! We all know that bad moods can affect our lives, but the good news is that you're aware of your emotions and have very clear values. So let's start by caring for ourselves, taking care of our bodies and our feelings.

We can ask for help. We know this thing is bothering you, and we know it's not easy to overcome it immediately. We're here for you! Try to find a family member or friend you trust and who has always given you positive support to talk to. If you feel the need, you can also find a counselor, because emotions must be released to relieve the heaviness and blockage in our hearts.

Finally, we just need to adjust our mentality and let go of some of the burdens of thought. After all, we are now in the critical stage of our senior year of high school, and we try to create a quiet and peaceful atmosphere. On weekends, we can go out and experience the real nature, feel the birds singing, the flowers blooming, and the wind and sun shining. We believe that by combining work and rest and maintaining a happy mood, we will be able to live a wonderful life.

We highly recommend reading the book "5% Change" in your spare time.