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Always alone inside, how can I escape the feeling of isolation that I can't seem to shake off?

high school bullying loneliness introverted state suicidal thoughts mental exhaustion
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Always alone inside, how can I escape the feeling of isolation that I can't seem to shake off? By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024

Because I have always been alone in my heart, after experiencing being bullied and isolated by high school classmates, I reflected on the problem, and thus I returned to that introverted and defensive state of loneliness. Some relatives said I am too immersed in my own spiritual world, unwilling to interact with others, but what can one do about it? I have even wanted to commit suicide because of interacting with others, and because I couldn't accept my own shortcomings, I constantly negated myself.

Now, as a second-year university student, even when the teacher calls me out to answer a question in class, I don't have the courage to speak up. There is no one willing to come close to me, pull me out of the feeling of loneliness, and I want to break free yet enjoy this sense of loneliness. As a result, my mental exhaustion has become increasingly severe. How can I escape this feeling of being isolated from the crowd?

Isabella Marie Roberts Isabella Marie Roberts A total of 4978 people have been helped

Greetings.

A gesture of encouragement, such as a pat on the shoulder or a hug, can be beneficial in providing comfort and support.

"I have consistently experienced a sense of solitude and isolation. How might I overcome this pervasive feeling of loneliness?"

Given that I have consistently experienced feelings of solitude, I was subjected to bullying and social isolation by my high school classmates. Upon reflection, I reverted to a defensive, introverted state of loneliness. Family members have asserted that I am excessively preoccupied with my own mental world and reluctant to engage with others, yet this observation is inconsequential.

Your inquiry leads me to conclude that you have not had the opportunity to form a reliable emotional partnership. You have consistently maintained emotional secrecy, neither expressing nor refusing to express your feelings. As a result, others are unable to comprehend your authentic thoughts and feelings, and you are unable to identify a facet of yourself in life that evokes a similar sense of belonging, which further exacerbates your feelings of loneliness.

If this sentiment has been present since childhood, it is to be expected that it will persist into adulthood. This is due to the fact that one's "old interpersonal patterns" have been in place throughout one's life, and the experiences that one associates with these patterns will therefore remain consistent.

It is important to note that this does not imply any inherent deficiency in the individual, nor does it suggest that they are undeserving of forming new relationships. It merely indicates that, at this particular point in time, they are not yet prepared for the demands of a new relationship.

Such an individual may find themselves in a situation where they are compelled to leave behind a life of comfort and ease, entering into a social circle that is incongruous with their existing lifestyle. This transition may not necessarily result in the alleviation of their inner loneliness, but rather may potentially exacerbate feelings of self-doubt, a sense of worthlessness, confusion, and feelings of helplessness.

It is essential to recognize that an individual's emotional state is shaped by their unique circumstances. When confronted with discomfort or a need for change, it is crucial to identify the underlying cause and determine whether personal growth is a necessary step.

It is only when a solution is found that the individual can accept themselves and subsequently effect change.

To illustrate, as previously stated, during my formative years, I was subjected to bullying and social isolation, which instilled in me an apprehension and negative outlook regarding interpersonal relationships. Despite my advancing age, I still exhibit a reluctance to form social connections and seek recognition. This is due to my tendency to replicate the relationship patterns observed during my younger years. Consequently, I am now in a position to leverage new insights to transform my long-standing sentiments and experiences.

For example, if the other person smiles at me, I can return the same smile to demonstrate friendliness and openness. Over time, a healthy emotional connection between us will be established, and my expectations of interpersonal relationships will evolve in a more optimal direction.

The environment is undoubtedly a significant factor, yet it is the cognitive model and thoughts of the individual that play a more pivotal role. These elements shape the individual's ultimate feelings and experiences.

One may choose to alter one's own characteristics or opt to refrain from such changes for the time being. It is of the utmost importance to maintain self-care and to view circumstances with benevolence and optimism. As a result, one's emotional state may become more tranquil and serene.

It is my hope that this response will prove useful to you.

I wish you the best of success!

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Aria Marie Bell Aria Marie Bell A total of 832 people have been helped

Hello, question asker. I can see the confusion you are facing now. Let me be clear: you will get through this. Hugs to you!

You enjoyed that sense of loneliness.

Your classmates bullied and isolated you in high school.

As a result, you made a point of being alone.

You won't be hurt unnecessarily again as long as you don't get along with people.

This is a self-defense mechanism your body is using.

You should seek help from a professional counselor.

A counselor can and will address your experiences of being bullied and isolated by your classmates in high school.

You will be able to return to the crowd normally and resume a normal experience of interacting with people after processing.

This is likely related to your inner child.

Read Embracing the Inner Child.

Read the books of the psychological counselor Ren Li (Our Inner Defenses: Coping with Everyday Psychological Harm).

I am confident that you will find a solution to your problem soon.

That's all I have to say on the matter.

I am confident that my above answer is helpful and inspiring to you, the questioner. As the answerer, I can assure you that I study hard every day.

You are loved here at Yixinli. Best wishes!

You will find the answer you are looking for!

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Comments

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Violet Knight Life is a song of the soul, let it be heard.

I can relate to feeling like an outsider. It's hard when you've been hurt before and it makes you want to retreat. The road to healing is long but taking small steps, like talking to someone you trust, might help ease the pain and isolation.

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Timothy Davis Success is about taking responsibility for both your achievements and your failures.

Sometimes we build walls around us not to keep others out, but to see who really cares enough to break through. Maybe finding a hobby or joining a club where people share your interests could open up new connections and gradually let more people in.

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Ralph Davis The most successful people are those who have learned the most from their failures.

It's okay to take time for yourself and heal at your own pace. Sometimes professional help can offer tools and strategies to cope with these feelings. Therapy has been beneficial for me; it might be worth considering if you're ready.

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Russell Jackson The more we grow, the more we understand that growth is a process of self - discovery and rediscovery.

Feeling alone can be so overwhelming. Remember that it's okay to reach out for support. Even reaching out online or through anonymous forums can be a start. You don't have to go through this all by yourself. There are people who want to understand and help.

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Gage Davis Growth is a process of learning to turn our fears into fuel for growth.

The desire to isolate comes from a place of selfprotection, but it can also prevent us from growing. Perhaps setting tiny goals each day, like smiling at one person or saying hello, can slowly build up your confidence and make social interactions less daunting over time.

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