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By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024
Hello, question asker! I'm Jia Ao, and I'm not looking for anything. Just wanted to say hi!
I can see that you've been through a lot. It's totally understandable to feel the way you do. I'm here to help. You mentioned that you're particularly afraid of being stared at and being the focus of attention. I can relate to that. I've been there too. It's not easy. It sounds like someone who was like a psychopath stared at you for a long time before. They followed you and harassed you all the time. They stared at you every day during class. No matter how you changed seats, they would turn their head and body to stare at you. They were deliberately staring at you, no matter what you were doing. They were making all kinds of expressions. After this series of things, you now feel particularly uncomfortable even when you turn on the camera in class. I get it. I've been there too. You don't know what to do. I'm here to help.
It's totally normal to feel uncomfortable when someone is staring at you. It can feel like they're watching you all the time, and it can make you feel like you don't have any privacy or personal space. It's not easy being the center of attention, and it can feel like endless harassment and torment. You've made it clear that you don't want to engage with the other person, but it's not working. This situation has left you feeling upset, even when taking online classes, and you always feel like you are still being watched. How can you start to feel better?
I'd love to have a quick chat with you!
1. [Problem analysis] It's totally understandable that you're feeling overwhelmed. It's clear that your nerves are getting the better of you, and it's even affecting your ability to take online classes. It's totally normal to feel this way! It's just a matter of adjusting your mentality and trying to face reality with a bit more calm. If you're still struggling, it might be helpful to chat with someone in the psychology department of a regular hospital. They can help you work through your feelings in a safe and supportive space.
2. [Fear] It's totally normal to be a little nervous about making eye contact, especially if you've been stared at before. It's okay to feel a bit unsure about where to look when you first meet someone new. It can be a bit overwhelming, and it's natural to feel a little mentally drained when you're going through it.
3. [Systematic desensitization] It's totally okay to feel nervous! It's recommended that you remain calm and face it with an ordinary heart. You can usually try looking at the camera yourself, which is a more classic method: [systematic desensitization]. Take your time to strengthen your confidence in overcoming your fear. You can also participate in more social activities, actively express your opinions, make more friends, and actively integrate into group life. Try to persist in this way, and your fear will change. Don't worry too much, and I wish you all the best!
I really hope my answer helps! Sending you lots of love ??
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Comments
I understand how uncomfortable and unsettling that situation must have been for you. It's completely valid to feel uneasy now when the webcam is on during class. Maybe you could discuss your concerns with a teacher or counselor who can offer support and possibly help manage the classroom environment to make you feel safer.
It sounds like you've had a really tough experience, and it's natural to feel anxious in situations that remind you of what happened. Have you thought about adjusting your webcam angle or using a virtual background to feel less exposed? Sometimes small changes can make a big difference.
Feeling watched can bring back those unpleasant memories, especially given what you've gone through. Perhaps reaching out to classmates you trust might help. Sharing your feelings with them could lead to finding allies who can provide comfort and distraction during class.
That past experience must have been incredibly distressing. If you're feeling uncomfortable with the webcam, you might want to talk to the professor about alternatives, such as participating without video. Many educators are understanding and may accommodate your needs.
It's understandable that you feel this way after everything you've experienced. Consider if there are ways to set boundaries that make you feel more at ease, whether it's positioning yourself differently in the frame or having a conversation with someone in authority about your discomfort with being on camera.