Feeling out of place among colleagues, differing in values and worldviews, how should one interact?

Help the troubled and depressed. It feels like you've only been working for a short time, and I felt the same way at the beginning. Here are a few tips from someone who's been there.

You think you're responsible, while your colleagues are just so-so. This feeling is worthless.

Your leader's opinion of you and your colleagues matters. This is the harsh reality of work. I hope you can realize it and appreciate it soon, or it will have serious consequences.

Second, admit you feel this way. Many people feel the same, but don't show it or let it affect your actions.

What they are facing is not a big deal for you. If you think about it too much, it will affect your relationships with colleagues, your superior-subordinate relationships, your work environment and results. It will also affect your value, development and future.

If you don't fit in or it's not challenging, you can change to a more challenging work environment. But even in a challenging and promising unit, you'll encounter people who seem to be goofing off.

You may not understand everything I say, but I hope it helps.

A young man (ID: qingnianJIA2020) looking to keep in touch.

Yixinli Answering Questions Hall Mutual Aid Community, World, and I Love You

Hello!

It's clear you have some questions about your relationships with your colleagues. I'm excited to share my thoughts with you!

First, it's important to remember that the closeness of our relationships with others and the purpose of those relationships are different.

For example, we have the incredible opportunity to be more intimate with our loved ones, and our relationships with colleagues are more collaborative.

That's why some people say, "Embrace the adventure! Don't look for friends in the workplace. The workplace is not the place to find friends."

You don't choose your colleagues, and that's a good thing! We all work together because, quite frankly, we want to earn money, get promoted, and get a pay rise. And you know what? You're not looking for friends among your colleagues.

So, your common goal is to work together with your colleagues to get the job done. And who knows? Maybe you'll even develop a friendship along the way!

It's always great to have the best, but it's totally normal if you don't.

I've been working for many years now, and there are still few women in the office, with men being the majority. The few women who were there at the time were doing quite well, but over the years everyone has changed jobs, got married, returned to their hometowns, etc. It's a shame we've lost contact, but it's great to see so many men in the office!

So, it's only natural to have disagreements with colleagues over values. We can choose our friends, but we can't choose our colleagues, so it is only natural to have disagreements with colleagues over values.

Second, you get to decide whether or not to join in with colleagues' small talk and the like!

It really depends on your personal preferences and the company atmosphere!

From what you've told me, it seems like your company is pretty small, maybe even a private company. It's great that your colleagues are mostly locals or well-qualified!

But you are different! You want to work hard, change, and go further!

Do you want to join in on the small talk with your colleagues? In my opinion, if this kind of joining in makes you uncomfortable, then don't join in — but if it doesn't, go for it!

At work, it's all about your work performance! While interpersonal relationships are important, your work ability is what really matters.

If you are outstanding, but you keep a cold face all day, others will still think you are aloof. Just like Zhang Xiaolong from Tencent, who developed WeChat. He is probably the only person in Tencent who can't attend morning meetings because he can't get up. Even Pony Ma can't do it!

Absolutely! It really depends on the company, but most people are outstanding, and being a bit eccentric doesn't affect promotion or salary.

In my opinion, if your worldviews are different, don't worry about fitting in! You don't have to integrate into the company.

You're just using the company as a springboard anyway, so just work hard to improve your own abilities!

I am a psychological counselor who is often depressed and sometimes optimistic. The world and I love you!

Just keep getting along well?

Colleagues are just the people you see a lot at work. Not everyone is someone you chat with regularly.

As a general rule, people in the same department who are working next to each other will interact more.

At the end of the day, though, we're all adults here.

At the end of the day, work is about getting the job done.

If the other person can get the job done without being perfunctory, I don't think it'll cause any problems in your business interactions.

If you have something to talk about, then a normal chat is fine.

Ultimately, it's not always the case that you'll feel out of place with each other. You might not even realize it, and others might feel the same way.

In the workplace, it's definitely a plus to have compatible values. But if you don't, you're on your own when it comes to your finances, family, and even work content, right?

And unless you're in the public sector with a guaranteed salary or a company that provides generous benefits, everyone is just getting by. They're trying to live up to your standards of being better and working harder, but it's tough.

I think you need to take a step back and look at your position in the company from a more objective perspective.

To put it another way,

If you're really conscientious and serious about changing to a better job and working hard to get promoted, why would you want others to progress just as much as you?

They're not your family members or partners. You don't get any tangible benefits from their hard work, and there aren't any targets for income generation in the joint team.

Otherwise, the more outstanding they are, the more they'll take away from you—resources, promotion channels, and even opportunities to learn.

Doesn't that make it less consistent with what you want to achieve?

And if they slack off, they can still keep their jobs. Either they're happy with little to show for it, or they've become so skilled that they can do it with ease.

You just aren't studying hard enough to advance.

As you gain experience, work should become less demanding so you can learn more.

There's a hidden rule at play here: the so-called little reward of ease.

How can you be sure that other people aren't just sitting on a mountain of wealth?

If you can get away with it without being criticized, how do you know that other people aren't also backed by various people?

If you're still wondering how to gain more knowledge and skills, while others can climb faster than you and gain more just by chatting and helping others for a living,

At the end of the day, they think that life and work are pretty good, really good.

You have goals and interests that don't get in your way. How can you use your strengths and adapt to the needs of the group?

Or, at the end of the day, where are you in terms of needing to work or learning to be a person?

There's always someone you can learn from.

I personally believe that everyone has strengths and weaknesses.

So, there's definitely a way we can learn from each other and benefit each other. Especially when it comes to things that aren't that important to you, can you really turn this into a favor or benefit?

You can gain a lot from interacting with other people.

If you can, when you have the chance, try to get to the bottom of things.

There's still something you can learn from them, and there's definitely something about you that will make them see you in a new light and recognize you.

After all, it's not necessarily the case that the last three views we developed during our growth process are as harmonious as those with our family members, who will be our close colleagues in the future.

That doesn't mean we have a deep relationship or love each other, though. In the workplace and in social situations, it can even be about mutual benefit and a win-win situation.

Some people want to be the host and perform, but there will always be people who love to be the audience. A good play or story is only complete with an audience. Otherwise, everyone will grab the microphone and play the leading role, or everyone in the audience will only care about themselves and no one will want to participate.

A lot of things lose their true essence that way.

Just a heads-up: The above is for reference.

Fingers crossed it's good!