From time to time, his personality changes drastically and he becomes very irritable. Is it necessary to continue to be friends with someone like this?

Ultimately, it's up to you to decide whether or not to continue the relationship.

There are a few areas you should focus on:

1. Will his negativity affect your emotions and values? When we interact with others, we can't help but consider how our surroundings influence us. In other words, the environment affects how we grow and change, and this is subtle and often goes unnoticed.

Take a look at how you are now compared to how you were before. Have there been any big changes in your attitude towards life?

2. Do you have the strength of will to maintain your initial intentions and progress? If so, you can continue to interact because he needs your influence.

3. You've been together for a while now, so you probably know each other pretty well. He might have done this because of certain pressures on the one hand, and to show his true self on the other.

So, does your relationship with him now make you feel stressed or even at a loss compared to how you felt in the past?

No matter how a relationship develops, you need to remember that you are an independent individual. You can only adapt and change your environment by protecting yourself.

Ultimately, it's up to you, not your subjective feelings, but whether your decisions will make you regret them.

All the best!

Hello, host.

I am letmefly, and I am here to help you and get your help.

The original poster has a friend who was initially very nice, but now he has discovered that the person's world view does not quite match his own. The original poster is confused about whether or not to break up. I am here to tell him that he should not break up with this person.

The original poster's problem is not serious. We all know that friends are defined by us. We don't define as friends anyone we know, and it's not true that just because someone has known you for a long time, they must be your friend. At most, they are just an acquaintance.

Furthermore, I don't know what the criteria are for choosing friends, but I know we all have criteria for judging friends. Confucius said, "Three friends are beneficial: a friend who is straightforward, a friend who is forgiving, and a friend who is knowledgeable." Modern psychology also tells us that we can have friends with similar interests, friends in the workplace, and friends of different ages. Well, since they are different types of friends, the way we get along with them will definitely be different.

The original poster should accept the friend as they are. The parts you approve of are the things you get along with, and the parts you don't approve of, the original poster can just find other friends.

Let's be real, no one is perfect. And friendship is the same. It's a process. Sometimes we grow closer, and sometimes we grow further apart. But here's the thing: a 90-year-old Japanese psychologist once said something that I really like: don't reject those who come, and don't chase those who go.

Get along with those you can, and don't regret it if it's over with those you can't.

I am confident that this will be helpful for you. I look forward to your feedback, attention, and praise.

Friendship, forgiveness, and knowledge.

Hello. Thank you for inviting me.

You ask me if it's necessary to keep such a friend. I say it is. You've defined him as a friend, which means you care about him and have him in your heart.

Your hesitation represents those uncomfortable feelings you have when you are with him, such as worry, fear, dissatisfaction, and disappointment.

You need to ask yourself: what is the answer you long for? If it is not necessary, you can leave. You just need to decide what you cannot leave behind.

You need to decide what it means for you to leave him. And if necessary, you need to learn how to deal with the feelings of discomfort you experience when you are with him. You need to understand what about these feelings has to do with him and what about them has to do with you.

I am convinced that behind every relationship is our relationship with the various parts within ourselves. What parts of him make you uncomfortable? They touch which parts within you?

This relationship is a channel for us to better understand ourselves.

Every relationship is an opportunity to practice clear boundaries. We must distinguish between what is mine and what is his. Have I taken on some of his responsibilities or his homework?

Ultimately, whether a relationship begins or ends is always about separation. We all go through different kinds of separations in our lives, but the meaning of separation is unique to each of us.

What are you afraid of when you can't leave a relationship? It's likely to be one of the following: our inner sense of security, our relationship with our close parents, or our fear of loss.

Don't rush into a decision. We all have to face these lessons in life, so take your time and be true to yourself!

If you feel unsafe and worried about getting hurt, trust your instincts, protect yourself first, retreat to a safe distance, and then think slowly. You are the most important thing in the world to you!

Best wishes!

Good day. I extend my utmost support and encouragement in this challenging situation.

In your initial inquiry, you indicated that you have formed a friendship. However, over time, you have observed that your friend displays a negative attitude, exhibits laziness, and displays a tendency to alter their personality frequently.

Furthermore, you have been together for a considerable length of time and are reluctant to part ways. Do you believe it is essential to maintain this friendship?

It is likely that you already have an answer in mind. It seems that you do not believe it is necessary to end the relationship, but after spending so much time together, you may feel that it would be unwise to do so.

My inquiries are focused on how I can assist you in navigating this relationship.

Firstly, the decision of whether or not to continue a friendship is one that can be made independently. However, you have sought assistance in this matter.

Please clarify your objective in seeking assistance. Do you require a definitive recommendation? Or are you hesitant to make a decision?

If someone were to inform you that continuing the friendship could pose a danger to you, for example, you should immediately terminate the relationship. Would you accept this advice?

If someone were to inform you that friends should learn to be tolerant of each other, that you have been together for a considerable length of time, and that it would be unfortunate to part ways, and that you should remain on good terms,

Would you be amenable to this suggestion?

It is possible that a different opinion may be provided, or even a completely different opinion.

This will make it more challenging for you to make a decision, as you will now have to consider the opinions of online users, which may impact your ability to make a clear choice.

However, other individuals, regardless of their level of empathy, can attempt to empathize with your situation. However, they are not you, and they may not have all the relevant details.

The information provided is based on the individual's own knowledge and may not be applicable to your specific circumstances.

Overall, I believe you have already considered the options regarding whether to continue. Asking here is probably hoping that someone will take responsibility for making the decision.

It is important to note that the opinions expressed here are those of an internet user, not a personal advisor. In real life, some individuals prefer not to make decisions, often because they believe it is more beneficial to defer to the judgment of others.

For instance, if an individual wishes to pursue a career in art but their parents believe that accounting is a more suitable path, and they choose to study accounting, but subsequently encounter difficulties in securing employment after graduation,

You may simply inform your parents that they are responsible for your current situation, given that they encouraged you to pursue accounting studies and now you are unable to secure employment.

Naturally, this is merely an illustrative example and does not reflect your specific circumstances.

In your current situation, the only person who can make a decision is you. Of course, the only person who will be held accountable for the outcome of this decision is also you.

It is important to note that circumstances can change. If you are currently determined to continue a relationship, but feel that it is not the optimal choice in the future, you have the right to reconsider. This is not a one-time decision.

The second question is whether the decision to select an individual as a friend is often based on the value that person can provide.

In essence, these values can be classified into three main categories: sexual value, material value, and emotional value.

As a married couple, we typically seek a partner who can provide three types of value. It is, however, possible that some individuals may place a higher value on one particular type of value in their partner.

As colleagues, we typically have a greater need for emotional value. What is more important, the positive or negative emotional value that the other person can provide?

It is important to note that in most cases, there are both positive and negative aspects to consider. After weighing the pros and cons, if the positive aspects outweigh the negative ones, it is likely that you will choose to continue the relationship. Conversely, if the negative aspects outweigh the positive ones, it is probable that you will choose to terminate the relationship.

It is possible to evaluate the value that the other person can provide to you and the negative emotions you have to put up with from the other person. This evaluation can then be used to determine whether the relationship is worthwhile.

It is important to note that no relationship is perfect. However, with the right approach, a relationship can continue to be a positive force in one's life. The decision to continue a relationship is often driven by a cost-benefit analysis, weighing the pros and cons of the relationship.

Third, while we may not be able to alter the behavior of others, we can certainly endeavor to modify our own actions and leverage our personal changes to encourage similar adjustments from the other party.

This is a significant challenge. First, we must alter our mindset and cease expecting the other party to alter their behaviour. Then we must implement changes to our language and actions to motivate the other party.

However, it is often challenging to motivate individuals with low psychological energy to embrace change. They are more likely to be influenced by external factors.

I recommend that you consult with a counselor to gain clarity on these issues.

I am a counselor who is often Buddhist and sometimes pessimistic, occasionally positive, and motivated. I extend my best wishes to you and the world.